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mist you already presents: mist and claw

Chapter 8: election night shenanigans

Summary:

The country has gone to shit (again) and the demigods are barely holding onto their sanity.

Notes:

writing this through tears btw

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Associated Press ✓

@APNews:

Donald Trump has been elected 47th president of the United States.

> Piper ✓ — @pipes_mclean: IM BEING SO SERIOUS WHO VOTED FOR THIS CUNT UNFRIEND ME NOW IF YOU DID

 

Percy’s not my type:

Percy: Rachel I thought you were being sarcastic

Rachel: I didn’t actually know i swear to apollo

Rachel: I was just trying to get out the vote

Annabeth: why are we all registered in safe states what’s that about

Will: I’M registered in texas i did my civic duty

Will: can’t be blamed if my neighbors hate gay people AND the greeks

Piper: sorry for your loss rip

Nico: sorry i’m legally 100 they won’t let me vote

Piper: its hard for native folx to vote out here rip

Frank: IM CANADIAN I CANT REGISTER ANYWHERE

Frank: now is anyone going to explain wtf an electoral college is

Hazel: don’t get me started i swear to pluto

 

Camp counselors create chaos:

Stoll 1: soooo….

Annabeth: absolutely not

Clarisse: come on i think it’ll be funny

Annabeth: YOU CANNOT STEAL A PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION

Percy: annabeth, let him cook.

Katie: well i don’t believe in fighting wars so we may just have to let the stolls get to work

Annabeth: you need a better plan. don’t put it in writing, i’ll be there in 30.

Piper: that’s the annabeth i know and love

Percy: on a slightly sadder note: stay inside pls and tell your cabins not to travel long distances, we don’t know what’ll happen in the upcoming days, especially to people who are known as demigods

Percy: and if there’s anyone weird outside the magical border, well don’t talk to them, get chiron or mr d 

 

“Prince” Percy 🔱 ✓

@prince_perseus:

Hey donald, you should swear on the styx about something and then break it ,, idk i hear that’s all the rage nowadays

> “Prince” Percy 🔱 ✓ — @prince_perseus: or we can just duel idc whatever floats your boat

>> Georgie 🗡️— @percysgraystreak: and when percy jackson defeats trump in hand-to-hand combat then what republicans

>>> Kenneth Jordan — @kennethjordan: he’ll be arrested as is expected of all you deviants

>>>> Poseidon ✓ — @Poseidon: i dare anyone to try to arrest my son, they will suffer the consequences

>>>>> “Prince” Percy 🔱 ✓ — @prince_perseus: aw thanks dad so based

 

gracie 🍉 

@graceisbased:

reasonable crashout on my timeline today was hoping it’d be elon musk however 

> gracie 🍉 — @graceisbased: i am part of the crashout i seriously can’t believe yall are still racist

>> Usha | free palestine — @ushasword: i can but damn they can at least be quiet and shameful about it

 

screaming alone together

@finalgirls:

lmaooo this is great 😭😭😭 laughing so i don’t cry 😭😭😭 i don’t want my rights gone 😭😭😭

> sandy’s sea shells — @sandonthebeach: 😭😭😭 don’t think its working 😭😭😭

 

Rachel Elizabeth 🍉 ✓:

@OracleRachel:

And without further ado, here is my list of the people/deities who i would’ve preferred win (list gets more unhinged as it goes on):

> Rachel Elizabeth 🍉 ✓ — @OracleRachel

Kamala Harris (obvi), Joe Biden (im sorry we disappointed you gramps), michelle obama (mother i’m REALLY SORRY), Bernie (yall remember feel the bern?), Hestia (no explanation needed), Athena (would honestly fix this country in 3 business days), Dionysus (inauguration would’ve gone crazy), Demeter (climate change would be over), Hera (girlboss even when she’s hating), Zeus (runs his empire with an iron fist), Kronos (would’ve never let this happen), Gaia (should’ve destroyed the world LMAO piper why did you send her back to sleep)

 

>> Piper ✓ — @pipes_mclean: damn so if i let gaia destroy the world we would’ve never been in this predicament my apologies

 

>> local arsonist 🔥 — @boyonfire: hey i died for that last one !!

>>> Rachel Elizabeth 🍉 ✓ — @OracleRachel: so sorry that was a mistake on your part she should’ve destroyed the world and razed the earth

 

>> “Prince” Percy 🔱 ✓ — @prince_perseus: LMAOOOO should’ve let kronos win he would’ve NEVER let this slide

>>> Poseidon ✓ — @Poseidon: Perseus.

>>>> “Prince” Percy 🔱 ✓ — @prince_perseus: Father.

 

>> Phoebus Apollo ✓ — @Apollo: i cannot believe my evil grandfather made the list but i did not

>>> Rachel Elizabeth 🍉 ✓ — @OracleRachel: should’ve voted for Kamala then

>>>> Phoebus Apollo ✓ — @Apollo: rachel i am several millennia old and greek
>>>>> Will ☀️ — @will.i.am.solace: all i’m hearing are excuses

 

>> masha | check linked for support group info — @nobitezforyou: demigods and co: wow we fought two wars to make sure these ancient gods wouldn’t destroy the world

also demigods and co: still would’ve made a better president than trump bring them back

 

Richard 🇺🇸

@godsaveamerica:

Its time to send these gods back to where they came from with our president back in office

> Prince Niccolo ✓ — @prince_nico: L ratio you suck ass hope you die in a fire can’t wait to reap your soul

>> jason grace — @lightning boy: LMAO THEY GOT NICO OUT HERE ON MAIN

>> “Prince” Percy 🔱 — @prince_perseus: get him again for me ghost king

 

“Prince” Percy 🔱 ✓

@prince_perseus:

Once upon a time i was retired and now i realize atlantis is going to want me on the front lines because there’s no chance for peaceful talks with a polluter like him

> “Prince” Percy 🔱 ✓ — @prince_perseus: and tbh i don’t want peaceful talks i want to curb stomp him and dropkick him into the ocean (for legal reasons this is a joke)

> Rachel Elizabeth 🍉 ✓ — @OracleRachel: and when y’all realize percy can blood bend then what

>> “Prince” Percy 🔱 ✓ — @prince_perseus: and my beautiful fiancee gave me permission to use it 🥰

>>> Link — @lincolns6481463: only betas ask for permission

>>>> Piper ✓ — @pipes_mclean: it’s always the omegas pretending to be alphas putting down betas smh

>>>>> Isla — @mcleanonmeplease: the only saving grace on this terrible day is that piper knows what the omegaverse is

>>>>>> Piper ✓ — @pipes_mclean: obviously i wasn’t raised by wolves

>>>>>>> jason grace — @lightningboy: and wtf is that supposed to mean

 

(Used to) like percy jackson:

Rachel: ANNABETH IM SCARED

Rachel: THESE VISIONS ARE TERRIFYING

Annabeth: any prophecies?

Rachel: noooo but certain flashes of death and destruction

Annabeth: so any usual tuesday then

Annabeth: have nico bring you to the stoll’s, we’ve got work to do.

Notes:

LMAOOO im having a breakdown i got stressed last night so i smoked a flat blunt reread my favorite fanfics and then fell asleep, woke up at 2AM (PST) and trump had won pennsylvania so then i sat at my computer, deleted twitter, and wrote this piece of garbage

it's now 4am and i will not be able to sleep but i plan to get dutch bros today and then bake bread for 12 consecutive hours instead of being productive so i guess sleep doesn't matter

[i was working on a 5 1 for the next iteration of this and truly hadn't written anything about the political world building since like july but ALAS HERE WE ARE]

please give me comments and kudos im begging and depressed

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