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The ‘star of the Japanese ballet’. The ‘greatest talent the country [had] ever seen’. The ‘dancer whose movements [had] amazed the crowd on four continents’. The ‘Spectacle’.
The man who was currently sitting on the couch, playing video games and snacking on a packet of Pocky sticks.
Sometimes, Kazuki had a hard time matching these images in his head. Watching his husband train for hours every day certainly helped, but it didn’t change the fact that the Rei of the stage and the Rei of their home were two separate entities. It was as though when the music faded, that Rei did as well.
Kazuki flipped the piece of French toast in the pan and kept on with his staring. He knew he had to appreciate these quiet moments, because within four days he would be the one sitting on that couch with Miri, watching the love of his life perform in Italy.
He always wished he could accompany Rei, but Miri couldn’t be absent from school. Besides, two weeks wasn’t much. He could handle it. Doing all the housework alone was nothing new to him, even though Rei tried to help more nowadays, and first-grade maths wasn’t too difficult, thank you very much. He could more than handle looking after their home and daughter all by himself.
What he couldn’t handle was the constant worry that overtook him whenever his husband was abroad. What if he got hurt, or overexerted himself? He knew it was illogical, but he had seen Rei after a performance, sitting with his feet bleeding and his shoulder wrapped in bandages.
The cheery music of Morio Kart and the sizzling of the butter were the only sounds in the room. Miri sometimes let out little gasps and giggles as she watched her papa race, but otherwise she was calm. No approaching tantrums, no crying. She had gotten better at the whole ‘Rei-papa is going away’ thing in the last three years.
Kazuki turned off the gas and dumped the French toast onto the awaiting plate. He poured a healthy amount of maple syrup on it. It was the last day they could hold a dinner like this, as tomorrow it was back to what Miri called ‘the uhh days’, when most meals consisted of vegetables and chicken or fish.
It was slightly boring, and Miri was rather picky when it came to vegetables, but rather that than listening to another one of Kyuutaro’s lectures on what a pre-tour diet is supposed to look like. An angry Kyuutaro was a sight that could put fear into the hearts of criminals.
“Oi, dinner’s ready,” he said over the cheering from the TV.
His voice distracted Rei enough that his go-cart hit a boulder in the way, and he fell back into the last position. He sighed and turned it off.
“Coming,” he muttered as he stood.
Oh, you will be. Kazuki thought as he placed the last plate on the table. Unhealthy food wasn’t the only thing they would be abstaining from in the next few days. Kyu-chan also had a strict ‘No anal sex before tours’ rule. Man, had that been an uncomfortable conversation.
Miri hopped onto her chair and gasped.
“Hurry up, Rei-papa! Kazuki-papa made French toast!”
Rei sat down beside her, in front of his husband. Kazuki reflexively placed his foot on top of his.
“Thank you for the meal,” the little girl said grinning, not even waiting for the others to finish the phrase and digging in like she hadn’t eaten in a week.
(Or like she hadn’t been eating Pocky sticks before dinner, don’t think I didn’t notice, Rei.)
“So, Miri, how are your friends?” He knew he had to keep her talking to avoid her getting a stomach-upset by eating too fast. They had learnt it the hard way.
“Well, Ichika-chan hurt her elbow on the playground yesterday, and has a plaster now,” she said, before shoving a piece of French toast into her mouth. A piece that was probably bigger than her whole fist. Kazuki had given up trying to understand the physics of the little girl.
“I hope she’ll be okay.”
“And Fumiko-chan’s mama and papa promised to get her cat for her birthday.”
Her tone was nonchalant, but in a forced way. And Kazuki didn’t miss the way she and Rei glanced at each other. This was a ploy. A very obvious one at that.
The two had been dropping hints at wanting a cat for the better part of the year. So far, Rei had been sort of reasonable, but Miri was a child, and saw absolutely no reason why they couldn’t just take a stray home. There were plenty in the alleys they sometimes crossed when going to school.
“Ah, good for her. She must have a family that is always home and lives in a building where cats are permitted.” he glanced meaningfully at his husband.
“Maybe some day we will be like that too,” Rei mused under his breath.
It was true. He was twenty-five, and his career wasn’t going to last forever. He had a good ten years, if he didn’t get injured until then, but afterwards he would have to look for another job. Maybe take up teaching. Or more likely try and forget the whole thing had ever happened.
“Yeah, maybe.”
…
Kazuki opened a can of beer. He tried to drink less now that they had a daughter, but tonight was special, and it wasn’t like he had much to do before going to bed. He and Miri were seated on the couch, two bowls of chocolate flavoured cereal in front of them, watching the TV.
He had hooked up his laptop to it, so they could watch Kyuutaro’s live stream. He was kind enough to always make one during Rei’s most important performance on the tour, sometimes form the first row, other times from backstage. It might not have had the best picture quality, but it was always spectacular.
Miri was bouncing in her seat, staring at the screen impatiently.
“Hey, Miri?”
“Hmm?” she didn’t turn her gaze.
“Have you ever thought about taking up ballet?” Kazuki asked off-handedly.
“Nuh uh,” she said, suddenly serious. “I’m going to be a singer like Mama.”
Kazuki briefly wondered whether Rei had had a conversation with her about dancing before.
The curtains rose.
“Ha, it’s starting!” Miri leaned forward with her eyes wide.
And what a start it was. Rei reclining on a bed, smoking a cigarette, wearing an overall with only one of the clasps in place. It revealed almost all of his chest in a way that made Kazuki want to whistle at the screen. His hair was tied in his usual on-stage ponytail.
Kyuutaro had chosen a rather short piece by Roland Petit titled Le Jeune Homme et la Mort. It was about a young man whose lover persuades him to commit suicide by hanging himself. It wasn’t even sixteen minutes, yet the male lead was considered one of the most demanding ballet roles.
Almost a year had gone into the training, even though there were only two characters on the stage. The choreography was brutal. Leaps and jumps that defied gravity, a certain passion that not every dancer could give back.
But Rei could.
By God he could.
Miri gasped at the screen.
“Woah… Rei-papa is so amazing!”
He couldn’t have agreed more.
…
The airport was busy, despite the early hour. People were rambling about, waiting for loved ones and business partners. There were two drivers holding placards with some Italian names written on them, a family of four where the two children were asleep, a woman with a teddy bear and a man with a bouquet of roses.
Miri was sitting on the floor, playing on her papa’s phone. He didn’t use to have games before the adoption, but afterwards it became almost a necessity. He wasn’t a fan of the ‘plop her down in front of a screen’ parenting technique, but needs must, and sometimes you just couldn’t risk a toddler getting bored. Every so often she glanced at the displays above the sliding doors which still proclaimed ‘Delayed’.
It was already a thirteen-hour flight, but with the added thirty minutes, he could only imagine the general mood of the passengers.
“Papa, papa, look!” Miri pointed at the sign.
‘Landed’
Fucking finally.
“Okay, Miri-chan. What did we discuss about this?” he crouched down beside her.
“We still have to wait a bit.” she recited eagerly, handing him back his phone. “No shouting. No running. Be polite to everyone. And most of all-” she leaned forward and frown, holding up a stern finger. “don’t call Kyuu-chan Kyuu-chan in front of the others.”
“Exactly!” he gave her a thumbs up.
A few people exited through the gates, holding light carry-ons. They hadn’t had to wait for the baggage carousel. Lucky bastards.
A few minutes later other passengers appeared, now with larger luggage. Miri stood on her tip toes to see better, not that it mattered much. Kazuki leaned down and picked her up.
She didn’t normally like being lifted anymore, but sometimes, when height was an advantage, she allowed it.
Another three minutes later a familiar pair of glasses appeared in the doorway.
Kyuutaro was accompanied by the young ballerina who had played Death, a woman in her twenties with short black hair and a round face. They were pulling their suitcases behind them, walking slowly. Kazuki hadn’t known the instructor could look this tired. His shoulders were slumped, and dark circles lay under his eyes.
Despite his apparent exhaustion, he spotted them quickly in the mostly empty area, partly due to Miri’s enthusiastic waving.
“Hello, you two.” he smiled, stifling a yawn behind his hand.
“I see Rei is the only one of us who has people waiting for him.” the woman (Akari?) laughed good naturedly. “The lucky little-”
“Oh, well, I just- I thought-” Kazuki laughed.
“Rei-papa!” Miri fell out of his grasp as she practically launched herself at the man walking through the gates.
“I told her not to shout…” Kazuki mumbled apologetically.
If Rei had been surprised by her presence, he didn’t show it. He crouched down before her and the two hugged each other.
“We missed you. But we saw your show!”
Kyuu and probably-Akari bid their farewells, and walked away in silence, so as not to disturb the family.
“That we did. You were amazing.”
Rei stood, letting go of his daughter reluctantly.
“Thanks.”
Kazuki kissed him before he could say anymore or see the tears welling up in the blond’s eyes. The kiss might have been a bit longer than socially acceptable in front of one’s child, at least in Miri’s opinion, as she made a soft gagging noise.
“I missed you too,” the dancer whispered.