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Their return to Camelot was silent, though it was filled with unspoken conversations between Arthur and Merlin. Uther pretended to be unaware, struggling with his reaction to what he had witnessed. The power demonstrated had been astounding, breathtaking, if he was being honest which, he admitted to himself, he rarely was where magic was involved. Hengist and his men had ambushed them, aided by a sorceress, imprisoning them in a dark tower and threatening to kill Arthur. He wondered if the sorceress had realised that Merlin had magic – why else would they have chained him using cold iron cuffs? Not that it had stopped him. But the thing that stuck in Uther’s mind, amongst everything else – the power, the loyalty to Arthur - was the way the woman had knelt to Merlin. What was it she called him? Emrys?
They crested the rise and the towers of Camelot were a welcome sight, as were the red and gold of the knights’ capes as a patrol rode in their direction. He roused himself.
“Arthur, you will come with me.” For the life of him, he could not bring himself to order Merlin to take care of the horses, or any other mundane task. He remembered the marks left on the boy’s wrists. For the first time, he looked in his direction. “Go to Gaius and have your injuries tended.” He almost laughed at the shock on both their faces.
Uther waited until Merlin had, with many a backward glance, trailed off towards Gaius’s rooms. He wasn't mad - to suggest that Merlin be arrested for using magic to save their lives would be a step too far even for him. He sighed. “It would be for the best if he left Camelot.”
“No, father. I think we’re a great deal safer if he stays.”
Uther was proud of Arthur’s calm, resolute response, even if he had hoped his hold on his son might still be paramount. Clearly not. “How can you say that, Arthur? Now that you know what he is. He lied to you -”
“No – well yes, I expect he’s told lies a-plenty. But it’s not like he had a great deal of choice, is it?” It was a rhetorical question and Arthur barreled on. “How could he possibly have told me about this, father? I can never blame him for being afraid.”
Uther stared at his son. How could Arthur not realise? How could he not see how dangerous this young man was? Emrys, the sorceress had called him - treating him like someone to be bowed to and revered. The power he had displayed had been incredible and Uther was afraid.
This boy had been hiding amongst them. Uther himself had appointed him as Arthur’s manservant. He felt cold suddenly. Merlin must have used magic to save Arthur that night. Perhaps he had even set it all up to get himself into a position close to the Prince. He inhaled deeply. Despite what many believed, Uther was not completely blind to how his fear of magic prejudiced him. The memory came clearly to him now, mainly because it had entertained him so much at the time. The utter horror on both their faces had quietly amused him. No, that younger Merlin had known it was dangerous to be so close to the prince. What had changed, he wondered now, to make the boy so loyal. To make Arthur so loyal to Merlin in return. Had Merlin done something? Had he cast some spell over his son?
He didn’t like the path his thoughts were taking and shrugged them aside for the moment.“For now, I will not banish him and knowledge of his magic will remain between us.” An unwelcome thought surfaced then, “Did you know?”
Arthur grimaced as if he had been afraid this question might be asked, but his gaze was direct when he answered.“I guessed he might have some magic – there have been so many lucky escapes. But I had no idea just how powerful he was.”
Uther frowned. Arthur had guessed but had said nothing to his king. “For this reason, he will no longer be your manservant and you will limit the contact you have with him as much as possible.” Arthur looked like he was about to argue.“This is not a discussion, Arthur. Gaius needs a full-time apprentice and that can be the explanation.” Gaius – someone else he needed to talk to. It seemed inconceivable that Gaius did not know. It was also clear that Arthur was concerned about Merlin’s status in the castle. Dismissal from the royal household would be a cause of shame, by suggesting he concentrate on his studies there would be no stigma. He watched his son as Arthur came to the same conclusion, pleased when he saw Arthur’s shoulders slump, and he released a long breath.
Arthur still had one surprise for him, though.
“I want to talk to him. One conversation in private and I give you my word that if anything he tells me is a threat to us, I will deal with it.”
Uther considered him, and shook his head, raising a hand as Arthur took a deep breath, preparing to argue.“There will be a conversation. And you will be present. As will Gaius. But I will be asking the questions.”
“An interrogation? Father-?”
He should have expected nothing less, but disappointment stirred in him anyway, as he acknowledged now that Arthur did not trust him. Not the way he trusted this boy. A memory of a resolute stance and a cold fury surfaced. This man, he amended. This man who had usurped the unquestioning loyalty Arthur should offer his king and his father. For a moment he thought he should feel rage, but instead, he merely felt tired and sad and old.
His raised hand stopped Arthur before he could say anything else, but the downturned mouth and lowered brow were enough to signal his displeasure.
“We will meet in your chambers.” It was a concession and he knew Arthur recognised it as such when his shoulders slumped and he ran a hand through his hair. “One candlemark, Arthur.” Uther pressed a hand to Arthur’s shoulder, feeling his own hurts and weariness and knowing Arthur must be feeling worse. It would be enough time for them to bathe and change, and for him to pull some semblance of authority together, to feel like a king again. Arthur nodded and Uther watched him as he walked away.
After a few directions to some nearby servants, Uther made his way to his chambers. It occurred to him as he walked, people bowing and curtseying as he passed, that Arthur probably knew all their names. He swallowed suddenly. Ygraine had always been the same, chattering on about random common people and their lives. He made it to his chambers though there was no real respite for the moment, not until a bath had been drawn, food placed on the table, and his manservant had completed his duties and been dismissed.
**
The hour passed with frightening rapidity and Uther had come to no firm conclusions, still mulling over everything as he made his way to Arthur’s chambers. He struggled as his mood veered alarmingly between rage, shame, and gratitude, and he retained enough self-knowledge to appreciate that this interview would not end well if he did not at least attempt to be calm.
He didn't knock, walking into the room to see Gaius dressing Arthur’s injuries, servants bustling around removing the bath and the remains of a meal that had hardly been touched. Frowning, he dismissed them before they could take the food.
“Where is the boy?”
Gaius met his gaze. “He will be here in a moment. I sent him for some wine.”Of course, Gaius knew. The silence is palpable, and neither Arthur nor Gaius will meet his gaze.
The uneasy hiatus is disturbed by a thud outside the room as if something has fallen. The door opened, and Merlin backed in, looking as if he was juggling whatever he held.
“Oh, blast and bother it,” a pewter goblet tumbled from his grip and rolled across the floor, stopping only when it came up against Uther’s boot. “If we need any more wine someone else can go,” announced Merlin, his back still to the rest of the room. “Cook’s in a foul mood, and I don’t see why -” He was unloading the jug of wine and remaining cups onto the table, spinning around and down to rescue the fallen vessel, suddenly looking up.
He scrambled backwards, falling, as he gazed up at Uther.
With a sigh, Arthur stepped forward and grabbed a flailing hand, hauling Merlin up off the floor and shoving him into a seat. “For pity’s sake, Merlin. Is there ever a chance that you can come into a room without making a production of it.” It sounded irritated, but Uther is watching closely, and saw the comprehensive look Arthur bestowed on Merlin, and the press of one hand to a shoulder. A touch that immediately seemed to ease the tension there.
Uther turned his attention to Gaius. “I assume Merlin has told you what happened with Hengist?”
“He did, Sire.”
“Very well. In light of the fact he saved our lives, it seems rather ungrateful to put him on a pyre. I assume we are all agreed on that?”
“Oh, definitely, I agree.”
For some reason, Uther is not surprised that it’s Merlin who speaks.
“Merlin!” Arthur sounded as if he’d been pushed beyond reason.
“What? It’s my life we’re talking about. Am I not supposed to have an opinion?”
“Nevertheless,” Uther broke into what was likely to degenerate into a full-blown spat. “Magic is still outlawed in Camelot.”
They all seem a little stunned by his calmness, and it gives Uther a moment of pleasure to see them all so wrong-footed. He gestured to the table and poured four goblets of wine, effecting not to notice when Arthur added water to Merlin’s goblet, or Merlin’s scowl, or Gaius’ mouth twitch in amusement. Instead, he waited until they are all settled.
“Could I burn you at the stake?” It’s perhaps not the opening gambit Uther would have planned given more time to get used to the whole situation, but it’s not bad as it turns out, because the bumbling servant is suddenly gone.
“No. You could not.” Merlin meets his gaze then, chin raised and expression stern.
There’s an uneasy silence.
“The sorceress called you by a different name. Emrys?”
“Yes.”
Gaius touched Merlin on the sleeve and for the first time, Uther noticed the dressings around the man’s wrists.
“I think the time for secrets has gone, Merlin.” His voice is gentle.
Merlin sighed, but it’s Arthur he turned to then. “I wanted to tell you, Arthur, I promise I did, but I didn’t want to put you in an impossible situation.
Arthur reached across the table and pressed his hand to Merlin’s forearm, careful to avoid the dressings. “I know Merlin, but I agree with Gaius. Answer my father’s questions honestly.”
“Honestly? Yes. You have no idea how much I hate lying, Arthur. How afraid I was that you’d hate me. I want to tell you everything, I do.” He hesitates. “But I can’t tell you things that would put other people in danger. I just won’t.” He turns his attention back to Uther. “Where I can, I will speak true.”
He drew a deep breath in and to Uther it seemed as if he grew taller in some way, his hunched shoulders dropped and his head rose. He has taken his stance and drawn his battle lines. Despite the fact this is a sorcerer, Uther cannot find it within himself to doubt his word. It affects them all – Gaius looks proud, he feels his reluctant respect alongside the fear and, yes, the hatred of magic, and Arthur? Well, Arthur looks like a love-struck fool. His gaze meets Gaius’s and he can feel the way his own eyes roll at the heated looks being exchanged by the two younger men. Something else to contend with in the days and weeks to come.
All his long-held sureties seem to be seeping away from him. He almost lost his son today, and he has the thing he hates and fears the most to thank, both for the danger and the rescue. His dearest Ygraine had died at the hands of magic, giving him his precious boy. For the first time, he wondered what she would have thought of his reaction to her death. He shied away from that quickly, turning his attention back to the cuckoo in this particular nest.
“Why did you come to Camelot?”
“I needed help. My mother thought that Gaius would be able to teach me – about, about my magic.”
Uther glared at Gaius, who appeared supremely unconcerned. “You gave me your oath.”
“I did. I gave you my oath to never again practise magic – and I have not broken that oath.”
It’s a fine line and they both know it, but it hardly matters now, and Gaius always had been a slippery character.
“Why did you stay?”
Merlin looks at him as if he’s daft.
“For Arthur.”
“Explain.”
Merlin sighed as if he’s a particularly dim student, and once again this young man managed to generate several different emotions all at the same time as anger wars with a sudden spurt of unwelcome amusement. Arthur passed a hand across his eyes and shook his head slightly as if this is familiar.
“The dragon called me.”
Uther had not been expecting that and knew his shock was as clear as Arthur’s.
“Dragon?” Arthur’s voice squeaked on the word, which might have been funny if Uther was not currently feeling disconcerted by the accusing gaze of an extremely powerful sorcerer.
“Your father imprisoned the last dragon under the castle. He called me.”
Uther flashed a look at Gaius then, seeing the slight shake of his head. Gaius had kept some of his secrets then. This boy is not just a sorcerer, but it seemed that he does not know his heritage. Kilgharrah would only have called someone with Dragonlord blood. He shoots another comprehensive look at the man in front of him and with his new knowledge, he can see the resemblance. “And what did Kilgharrah have to say for himself – other than trying to get you to kill me, I suspect.”
“Kilgharrah? Is that his name? He’s never said.” Merlin brightens at the knowledge before he shrugged. “Well, yes, he’s not your greatest supporter and who can blame him, really?”
Arthur let out a slightly pained sound at Merlin’s cheek, but Uther recognised that Merlin is done with subterfuge in all things.
“He said I had a destiny, that Arthur is the Once and Future King and I had to help him.” Merlin threw a quick smile in Arthur’s direction, an Arthur who is looking suddenly despondent. “I told him he was mad and that Arthur was a pompous, self-important ass – something like that, anyway.”
Arthur, for some reason, looked happier at that assertion and it takes Uther a moment to understand why. He exchanged another look with a quietly amused Gaius. It strikes him then that, despite the situation, Gaius was having the most fun he’d had in many years. He rolled his eyes yet again.
Merlin smiled at Arthur. “Then I saved you from the witch and your father made me your manservant and I got to know you. I would die for you, Arthur. Sometimes it frightens me, what I’ve done, what I would do, to keep you safe. Not because you’re supposed to be some great king – but because you’re already a good man and you’re my friend.”
There is a pause as Merlin visibly settled himself, before launching into a narrative, taking them through his actions since he came to Camelot, making it clear where there are gaps when he will not put others at risk, and there is a freshness and clarity to his delivery that rang with the sound of truth.
It staggered Uther, though he could not let that show. This boy, this young man, had saved his kingdom a dozen times or more. He had saved Uther’s life – a man who would have slaughtered him without thought or conscience – just because he was Arthur’s father.
When he finally stopped, Merlin sighed, sitting loose-limbed and relaxed, as if a huge burden had been removed from him. He looked up, his gaze lighting on Arthur’s face like a lodestone and what passes between them, without a word being spoken, closes Uther’s throat. He remembers when someone looked at him like that once.
“So what happens now?” Merlin asked, his attention finally coming to rest on Uther.
“If I banish you, will you go?” he asks.
“No.”
Hardly a surprising answer and neither Arthur nor Gaius react, as if they wouldn't expect anything else.
“My original plan was to remove you as Arthur’s manservant,” he raised a hand to halt the immediate response from Merlin. “However, I rather suspect such an attempt would also be fruitless.” he considers, taking his time and rather enjoying the way they all stare at him, obviously concerned about his judgement. “You will continue as you are, protecting Arthur and protecting Camelot. I still consider magic as dangerous, but there is no doubt that we have faced many magical threats and without magic working for us, we would have suffered great losses.” He can’t help but look at Arthur then and sees the sudden hope there. “I will allow magic practised by you for the protection of my son and kingdom. No one else must know. Is that clear?”
They all nod, though Uther knows – can feel – that the balance of power in the room has changed. He knows he should be angry, afraid, outraged, but somehow those emotions are washed away by utter relief. His son will be safe. There is little more to be said, and he leaves them there, walking to his chambers.
**
Uther watches Arthur and Merlin over the next weeks and months, and on the surface, nothing much seems to change. The two of them still bicker in a way totally inappropriate for a prince and a servant, they exchange smiles and touches they think he does not notice and they work together seamlessly. Occasionally, Merlin murmurs something in Arthur’s ear during a council session, covering it by ostensibly filling Arthur’s cup. There is a growing wisdom and insight in Arthur’s contributions and Uther recognises the source.
Interestingly, there seem to be few magical attacks, and no one has been dragged in front of him in chains, facing accusations of using magic, either. It was probably just as well, he thought. A couple of careful conversations with Gaius about Emrys was enough to suggest that he should leave the whole issue of magic to the person most fitted to deal with it. It occurred to him then, with some exasperation, that he seemed to have acquired a court sorcerer.
He is standing at the window and the subject of his thoughts comes into view. Arthur’s whole demeanour suggests disbelief, as Merlin gesticulates about something as they cross the courtyard. A young woman, intent on her own business, catches sight of them and bobs a hasty curtsey. As she does so, the provisions she holds tumble out of her arms, and fruit and vegetables rain down on the cobbles.
Uther watches as the two men scrabble around, gathering it all up. Arthur calls out and someone scurries up with a bag. Arthur grins at the man and says something that makes him laugh before he turns away. Arthur holds the bag open until Merlin packs everything away and then they speak to the girl for a few moments before moving on.
Ygraine, oh, Ygraine. How proud you would be of the man he has become – and how little I had to do with that. Your goodness shines through him. He thought of Ygraine and Nimueh walking across that same courtyard, and how jealous he had been of their friendship. He turns away, not liking the direction his thoughts are taking and instead muses, with thankfulness, on Morgana. She seemed happier these days and is sleeping much better. He has been worrying about her and her improved health is a real joy.
**
Uther has not been alone in a room with Merlin since the conversation between the four of them, and he hesitates as he enters the physician’s room and finds Merlin there on his own. Merlin looks up with a welcoming smile, which fades a little when he realises who is standing in front of him.
“Your Majesty,” he says after a moment’s awkward silence. “Gaius is on his rounds at the moment. Is there anything I can help you with?”
“My throat is sore.” Uther wonders what it is about the guileless blue eyes that have him admitting this when he had fully intended to return later.
“Ah, that’s sweeping through the castle at the moment, I’m afraid. It does mean that we’ve been brewing some potions to help, at least.” Merlin gestures down at the table. “That’s what I’m doing at the moment. We should still have some - “ he turns away and rummages through a shelf. “Here we are.” He hands two different-sized vials out to him, which Uther takes automatically. “The larger bottle will ease your throat during the day. Take a spoonful as needed. The smaller bottle is a gargle. Mix a spoonful with a goblet of water, gargle and then spit. Use it morning and evening. It tastes really horrible so don’t swallow it. That will help calm the infection. If it doesn’t improve in four days then come back to us.”
Uther placed the bottles safely in the pouch at his waist. “You still help Gaius?”
Merlin shrugged. “He needs the help, I like to learn and help people, and it means I can move about the castle and the town without anyone wondering too much about what I’m up to.” He meets Uther’s gaze – fearless.
Uther stared at this young man, who had saved his son’s life, who had saved the life of a man who would have killed him without a thought, simply because he was Arthur’s father.“You didn’t tell Arthur about your magic because you didn’t want him to have to make a choice.”
Merlin blinked at the sudden change of subject, then nods.
Uther weighed up what he wants to say now. Somehow it’s important – for Arthur and for Camelot, that Merlin understands. Now, more than at any time since he had lost her, he could feel Ygraine close, comforting and approving. “And if I tell you he had guessed? Not the extent of your power, but that you had magic. Do you understand what that means?”
Merlin is gaping at him and Uther can see the moment he understands, the moment he knows. Arthur had already chosen.
Uther inclined his head and turned to leave. There are words clamouring inside him, pushing to be let out. Love him. Protect him. Don’t hurt him. He doesn’t say any of them.
He doesn’t need to.
Fin