Chapter Text
The atmosphere in the church was heavy with grief and solemnity. The soft murmur of people paying their respects mixed with the faint scent of candles burning in remembrance. Maya and Carina sat close together, their hands tightly clasped between them, providing silent comfort to one another.
Maya stared ahead at the altar, her jaw clenched as the weight of yet another loss settled over her. The folded flag resting on the casket felt like a cruel reminder of the risks they faced every day.
Carina, ever attuned to her wife's emotions, brushed her thumb over Maya's hand, grounding her in the moment. She leaned in and whispered, "I'm here, amore."
Maya nodded, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. "It just never gets easier," she murmured.
As the service began, the eulogies painted a picture of bravery and sacrifice, echoing the deep camaraderie that came with the job.
****
Carina’s heart ached as she glanced at the rows of uniformed firefighters surrounding them, each face solemn, each carrying the same weight of loss. Her gaze shifted to Maya, who sat stoic and focused, her jaw tight and her hand gripping Carina’s like a lifeline.
A lump formed in Carina’s throat as the thought crept in, unbidden and cruel: One day, this could be me sitting here for her. The very idea made her chest tighten painfully.
She knew how brave Maya was—how dedicated, how selfless. It was one of the many reasons she loved her. But that bravery came with a cost, a constant risk that Maya accepted without hesitation.
Carina squeezed Maya’s hand, needing to feel the warmth and strength of her wife’s touch. Maya turned to her, her eyes softening when she saw the worry etched on Carina’s face.
"Hey," Maya whispered, leaning closer. "You okay?"
Carina swallowed hard, forcing a small nod. "I just... I love you so much, Maya. Promise me you’ll always be careful."
Maya's eyes flickered with understanding, and she pulled Carina closer, pressing a kiss to her cheek. "I promise, Carina. Always."
Carina nodded, her grip tightening, as the ceremony continued. She knew the fear would never fully go away, but in this moment, Maya's promise was enough to hold onto.
****
When they got home, the heavy silence of the day lingered around them. They moved almost in sync, each knowing the other’s rhythm so well. Maya changed into her favorite pair of sleep shorts and a tank top, while Carina slipped into soft leggings and an oversized shirt that Maya always thought made her look effortlessly beautiful.
They settled on the couch, Carina curling up tightly against Maya’s side, her head resting on Maya’s chest. She pressed herself closer than usual, her arms wrapped firmly around Maya as if afraid to let go.
Maya stroked Carina’s back in soothing circles, her lips brushing against the top of her wife’s head. She knew the weight Carina carried—the fear that always lurked in the background of their lives. Maya understood it well, even if she could never fully ease it.
"I wish I could make it easier," Maya whispered into the quiet.
"You make it easier by being here," Carina murmured, her voice muffled against Maya’s chest. "Just... hold me."
Maya tightened her embrace, her cheek resting against Carina’s hair. "Always," she promised softly.
For a long while, they sat like that, the weight of the day slowly easing in the warmth of each other’s presence. Maya knew she couldn’t promise that nothing bad would ever happen—life in their world was unpredictable. But she could give Carina this: her love, her touch, and the quiet assurance that as long as she could, she would come home to her.