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Fairy tales tell children that finding their mate was as simple as smelling someone who was scent compatible, falling in love and mating.
Mating was supposed to be a wonderful time in a couple’s life. The scarring of a mating bite was a point of pride for omegas. Because a True Mating Bond looked like a birthmark, a tattoo that proclaimed them as bonded to their soulmate.
A True Mating can only happen with compatible pairs, and bonds that weren't True scarred silvery like old wounds. It wasn't uncommon to see an omega with a scarred bond or two. Not uncommon, but still considered shameful in some circles.
Daniel bopped his head in time with the music in his headphones. The omega danced around his kitchen before opening his daily pill tracker and upended the slot labeled Tuesday. A chalky white pill, a golden oval liquid gel and a yellow capsule turned out. His usual cocktail of supplements to help his body stay in tip top shape.
His morning workout was complete, he needed to get ready and head to the factory for his sim sessions.
His shower was quick and he danced around the bathroom while he brushed his teeth and prepped his curls. Staunchly avoiding looking at the silvery scars in the junction of his neck. Washing his hands of the sticky product, he opened the cabinet to grab the small jar of scent neutralizing cream.
He scooped out a dab of product and smeared it in his palms before applying it evenly along the thick column of his neck and over each of his scent glands. The omega barely even noticed when his citrusy sweet scent faded into a bland note normally associated with linens or a clean room.
The rest of his routine was simple and efficient even if he did choose the sweater that Max had complimented him on that one time. He didn't even know if the alpha was coming to the sessions today– but, just in case.
The day passed by quickly when you were locked in the sim with your engineer. Outside of an early break, Daniel had been in the zone and hadn't wanted to interrupt the solid lap times he was putting in.
A hand tapped his shoulder as he took off his helmet, Max's crinkly eyed smile greeted him.
“Daniel, I was hoping to catch you.”
The omega preened, climbing out of the cockpit. “Hey Maxy.”
He didn't know when he'd started noticing Max. Noticing how lovely he was. Noticing that he would make an amazing mate, rather than a friend.
They'd been friends forever, from when they were teammates and practically lived in each other's pockets. Max was there for a lot of things, unfortunately mostly Daniel's failures. He'd been there when things hadn't worked out with Lewis and Micheal. Had helped Daniel move back into his old apartment when the matings didn't take. He'd been there when life at McLaren had destroyed him.
Max was always there. A silent support when Daniel needed it.
Daniel didn't deserve Max's attention, not romantically anyway. Max was a great alpha, a great friend. Daniel was a poor omega who had a neck full of scars like a diary of failed relationships.
He wasn't mating material. That much was clear.
But he couldn't help the flutter in his chest when Max smiled just for him. The winged hope when Max took care of him– he would gladly choke on the feathers.
“Are you finished today? Wanna grab some dinner?” Max followed him as he put away his gear, leaning against the wall casually and folding his arms. Daniel wished he was being held between those biceps, leaning against that chest.
His own chest burned.
“Sorry Maxy, not tonight.” Daniel winced.
Max was the perfect alpha and he would make his omega happy. Daniel ignored the thought that it could be him, ignored the want for it to be him. It wouldn't and it wasn't. Period.
Because Daniel clearly didn't have a soulmate and he wouldn't keep Max from finding his own. The alpha couldn't possibly find the love of his life if he was spending all of his time taking care of Daniel. He was a young, successful alpha in the prime of his life, he needed to be out there on the prowl so to speak. Not babysitting his best friend who made a bunch of poor life decisions.
Besides, Daniel had a date tonight.
He'd met an alpha through his agent, he was cute and funny and he reminded Daniel of Max. It wouldn't be anything serious, Daniel already knew that. But just because he couldn't have Max the way he wanted didn't mean he had to be alone.
He looked away quickly when Max’s eyes widened in surprise then settled in disappointment. Daniel ignored the sadness that leeched through his system like dye. It would be fine because Max would realize that this was for the best and move on to find his perfect mate that wasn't a washed up driver who didn't even have a seat.
“Oh? Well we can of course rain cheque. Have plans?”
“Uh yeah. I uh have–” Daniel fluffed his flattened hair self consciously. “I have a date.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah uhm, Nick introduced us. We're gonna get drinks.”
“And you are thinking he is your soulmate?”
Daniel laughed a hysterical sound, maybe. “Of course not. Maxy I haven't even met the guy. Maybe he smells like a dumpster or something.” He shrugged, not looking to see Max's reaction. He was fighting and failing at letting his alpha– letting Max know he was available. Because he was, but he shouldn't be available to Max. He couldn't be.
“Maybe you'll see him and gag because he smells so bad. Then you'll be stuck smelling like garbage the whole night.” Max teased and Daniel fought a losing battle to not focus on the jealous tone of his voice.
“Yeah if it's that bad then I'll call you to like pour baking soda on my head or something.”
“You know you can call me if you need help leaving, yes?” Max asked softly, earnestly. Daniel didn't deserve him.
“I know Maxy. I'll call you the moment it goes sideways.” He bit his lip so he wouldn't offer to cancel the date so he could spend time on the couch with Max. Offer to make one of his couch nests so they could cuddle together. He pressed his tongue flat against the back of his teeth to keep the words in their cage.
“Good. I of course hope it's not a shitshow. You deserve to be happy Daniel.” Max smiled at him and Daniel's heart whimpered.
— - —
Josh was cute and fun. Josh was silly and sturdy. Josh wasn't Max. And Daniel didn't want him to be. Max was Max. No one was Max.
And that was the problem.
Overall, it was fine. Because Daniel was just having a good time.
Their first few dates were fun, they had some things in common and Daniel felt that maybe he'd held out long enough, maybe. He liked a good romp and had a healthy sex drive and he was hoping to stray away from fucking around on the grid. Those relationships never worked out and it was sometimes painful to see his exes all the time. It wasn't a punishment he wished on anyone.
Besides, it had been a while since he had a knot that wasn't attached to a dildo.
Josh smiled widely when Daniel entered his hotel room and Daniel felt a small swoop in his belly at the evening to come. His face tingled with a blush.
There was no pretense of small talk, Josh's lips were firm and insistent and Daniel shivered when he was pulled close. Daniel rested his hand on Josh’s chest, moaning and tilting his neck for the alpha’s attention.
His skin felt hot, tingly. Daniel panted, then wheezed. He stiffened in Josh's arms, he couldn't breathe. His body felt like it was constricting, his throat felt swollen and his tongue heavy.
Daniel blinked up at the lights above him, his throat felt raw and sore. Max's face leaned over into his field of vision, eyebrows narrowed in concern.
“Max?” Daniel rasped.
“You’re in the hospital, Blake called me.” Max offered, knowing that was what Daniel wanted to know. He lifted a straw to Daniel's lips and helped him drink
“What happened?”
“Josh.” Max spat the name, “has a pistachio farm. You are allergic to him.”
Daniel groaned, how embarrassing. And for Max to be the one to once again see him at his lowest. Blake was Daniel's emergency contact, but the other alpha was currently in Italy with his new omega. Blake must have called Max because he trusted him.
Josh had a pistachio farm? And that hadn't come up at all in all of their dates. Daniel hadn't had any other reactions before now but that was probably because they spent a lot of time outside. This was the first time they'd even kissed. Fuck.
The doctor came into the room, halting whatever Max was going to say.
“Mr Ricciardo, how are you feeling?”
“I've been better.” Daniel tried and failed to clear his throat. Max gave him more water.
“My name is Dr Williams and I have a few questions, Mr Verstappen if you could give us the room please?”
“No, Max can stay– it's fine.” Daniel said before Max could argue. He saw the scowl forming before Max even realized he was reacting.
“Ah, if you're sure.” Doctor Williams nodded before looking at Daniel's chart. “We found some elevated hormone levels in your tests. Are you taking any birth control or supplements?”
Daniel opened and closed his mouth. He was, he has been for years. But they were never prescribed by a doctor. “Uh yeah I do.”
Dr Williams asked a few more questions that Daniel reluctantly answered, suddenly wishing he hadn't jumped in for Max to stay. This was all so humiliating.
“Mr Ricciardo, I'm gonna be frank with you. This isn't good. It's great and all that you've given yourself heat breaks, but taking unprescribed suppressants long term can be harmful in ways we don't even know. There's worry that this sustained high dosage may have affected your fertility or senses. You might have made yourself scent blind or worse.”
Daniel swallowed thickly, but nodded. So he made a poor judgement call, what was new? It couldn't have been that bad, he didn't think. He ignored Max's gaze, too embarrassed to look at him.
The uncomfortable feeling of his heart sinking into the bottom of his stomach was like an old friend. The disappointment followed on swift wings.
Well, he didn't have to worry about keeping Max from finding his perfect mate, he would no doubt be ready to start the search now that he knew for sure that Daniel was broken. Not a good omega in more ways than one.
Dr Williams left them alone after saying he would order some tests. The deafening silence was broken only by the beeping of the different machines.
“Daniel,” Max started softly.
“It's ok Maxy. I'll deal with whatever the outcome is– I mean maybe all this time I didn't have to like worry about getting knocked up by someone who I wasn't compatible with.” Daniel smiled a wide slash of teeth that was too brittle. Max held his hand softly.
“Whatever happens, I'm here too.”
“No– you don't like. It's fine Max. I can manage.”
“Daniel why–” he cut himself off and Daniel wondered what he was going to say originally. Instead he went down a different conversation. “When did you start these suppressants?”
Daniel looked away because here he was, a 34 year old omega with barely a job and the saddest romantic life ever. He always thought it couldn't get any worse and it always did. It always got worse. Just when he thought he hit rock bottom, he found another level.
This must have been the final circle of hell. Where he atoned for the sin of wanting to be liked, loved and adored. Wanting so badly to get mated and be happy so he settled for anything an alpha threw at him.
He rubbed his free hand along the scars on his neck, paying close attention to one just on the base. Daniel knew it by heart, the angle of the bite, the length of the scarred line. He knew it as much as he knew himself. It was the first one.
“I started taking them after Jev and I– well looking back it's clear but I thought he loved me I guess.” Daniel looked at their connected hands “I hadn't– not like– I was a virgin and we were teammates and always spending time together. I thought he loved me. He said he loved me and we were compatible and he wanted to mate me…” Daniel looked away so Max wouldn't see the shame on his face, the tears in his eyes. He cleared his throat and felt Max squeeze his wrist.
“So we mated, or tried to at least. It didn't take of course and Jev said I should go on suppressants so the scar would fade and I wouldn't go into shock or whatever he said and I believed him— I like didn't have a reason not to. He got them for me and we uhm dated for another year before he broke up with me when I got the call up to Red Bull. Turns out he just…wanted a regular fuck and who better than your omega teammate who was in love with you?” Daniel shrugged carelessly, as if it didn't bother him. As if the shame of it all didn't still coat his belly like acrid bile.
“And well by then I was used to taking the pills, and I never stopped. No one asked any questions. Not Jenson, or Lewis.” He named his other more serious relationships, the other scars on his neck. Not unlike notches on a bedpost. “Micheal knew– we had an argument over them once. But it was good to be on birth control you know? I could have fun with whoever I wanted.” Daniel sniffed and wiped at his tears quickly. “I mean it's probably fine. I'm not worried. It's not like anyone is trying to mate me anyway and the last guy I dated turns out I'm allergic to so yeah.” Daniel snorted a self deprecating sound. What a shit show.
“Daniel..” Max whispered softly.
“You– don't pity me Maxy. It's not all bad or whatever.”
“You have me–”
“I do and you're the best friend I could ask for.” He ignored Max's frown. “And when you find your omega, You're gonna make them the happiest person alive Maxy.”
“Daniel,” Max's frown was more pronounced now. Dr Williams entered the room and Daniel would never know what Max had been about to say.
— - —
Being scent blind was a lot like having covid, Daniel figured. Only, he could smell everything just fine– it was people he had problems with.
He didn't know anyone's true scent apparently. Didn't know what his own scent smelt like anymore.
Also, Max had been hovering a lot more than usual. Daniel figured it was to help him find a new normal, and to make sure he didn't accidentally send himself to the hospital again.
Having Max close felt nice but Daniel felt guilty. Guilty because he liked having Max pressed against him in a sofa nest. And he liked having Max around for meals instead of only seeing him when they could spare the time on race weekends. And with the cuddling, came scenting and there was a lot of that. It felt lovely. But Daniel still felt guilty.
Max's omega was out there and Daniel had him here playing house. He was selfish, but not with Max. Not with the person who made him the happiest and deserved to be happy in return.
“Lando and Charles are going out.” Daniel said, popping his new birth control pills. They weren't suppressants, weren't strong enough to be. They were just a low dose hormone to prevent pregnancy. Max looked up from his Switch and shrugged before going back to his game.
Daniel couldn't help but admire him lying lazily in his hotel bed, looking for all the world like this was his room too, his bed. And not that he was going to leave in an hour or so to go back to his own room.
“You're not gonna go?” Daniel prodded again. Max wouldn't be able to meet anyone if he stayed here.
“Why do you want me gone so badly, have a date coming over or something?” Max said it lightly while looking down at his screen but Daniel still felt his shoulders rise to his ears and his stomach clench in shame.
“No– I.” He bit his cuticle and fought a sniff, even as his eyes watered. Stupid new pills. “I think I'm– I'm just gonna go to bed early, maybe.” He walked into the bathroom, hoping his scent stayed neutral, he’d never worried about his scent before. He splashed water on his face and then started brushing his teeth. Looking for things to keep him occupied.
It was silly to feel hurt by the jab. It was a joke. Daniel was a good time, everyone knew. Had this been a few weeks and hospital trips earlier, maybe he would have been bringing a date home. It didn't matter that it was Max. It didn't.
“Do you want me to go?” Max asked from the doorway.
“I think you should go out with the guys. Maybe get a date or two. Live your life a little, you don't need to be taking care of me all the time.”
“Daniel, you were just in the hospital.” Max pointed out and reasonably Daniel knew it was because he was worried. But the coiling snake of his anxiety tightened around his heart.
“I can take care of myself Max.” He snapped, spitting harshly into the sink.
“I know that, but I want to help you.” Max explained patiently.
“You don't have to babysit me.” Daniel looked at him in the mirror.
“Of course I know this. You are not a baby.”
“You should be out being an available alpha, you're hot and successful. Maxy you will make any omega happy.”
“Are you?”
“What?” Daniel blinked at the question. He turned around so Max could see the true furrow of his brow.
“Are you happy?” Max repeated simply.
“I– like right now?” Daniel gaped a little, Max snorted.
“Like overall Daniel.” He said it like he was talking to a child.
“I.. guess so? Outside of everything?”
Max beamed, happy. “Good.” He turned to go back into the room and Daniel followed him.
“What? I'm so confused.”
“Daniel, you brought it up. I think maybe you really are tired. I'll go.”
“No, Max what?”
“Are you happy Daniel?” Max asked again and Daniel looked at him like he was crazy but nodded all the same.
“Yeah, I just said.”
“And that's all I wanted to know.”
“Are we like talking about the same thing?”
Max snorted good naturedly. “First you are telling me to go party then you are saying I'll make an omega happy. I've asked if you're happy Daniel. You're the only omega I care about if they're happy.” Max pointed out and Daniel ignored ignored ignored the butterflies in his belly.
“Not like that Maxy. Like as a mate.” Daniel clarified softly, sadly.
“And?”
“Max, I'm not joking.”
“Neither am I?” It was Max's turn to furrow his brow.
“You don't need to be cruel. I'm just– I just want you to be like happy.” The butterflies were dead, turned to ash on Daniel's tongue.
“Daniel, I am happy.”
“Max! I don't– I'm not talking about me ok. I'm talking about you– you can't– you spend all your time with me, taking care of me. You don’t spend any time for you. For dating. For like– your person is still out there y’know?” Daniel deflated, shoulders sagging. He felt raw. “You can still find your soulmate, your true mate. But like you won't be able to if you keep babysitting me. I'm a big boy, I can manage the consequences of my own actions.”
“Daniel you are– always you are so oblivious I think. But Dr Williams was right I guess.”
“What are you talking about?!” Daniel snapped.
“What do you smell like?” Max asked instead. Daniel sighed.
“I dunno, last I remember it was like something fruity.” He shrugged.
“What do I smell like?”
“Max…” Daniel felt uncomfortable because well, he didn't really know. He shrugged, “I'm not sure.”
“You smell like summer, like oranges and limes in the sun.” Max said softly and Daniel's eyes widened. “Lando says I smell like warm vanilla. And whenever I come from seeing you, I smell like a ‘fucking bakery in Nice’ is what he says.”
“I don't…” Daniel didn't understand.
“We are scent compatible Daniel. I don't need to go looking for my omega because I already found him and I've been staying close to you, showing you that I'm a good alpha for you.”
“Max…” Daniel didn't know any other words it seemed because what?
“I always thought that I was too young, you were dating Lewis and then Michael. I want to kill this Josh guy by the way for trying to kill you.”
“He didn't try to kill me.”
“Who owns a pistachio farm and not say anything?!”
“He didn't know I had a nut allergy?”
“They're like one of the top three most common fatal allergies. He should be declaring himself a fucking biohazard!”
“Max!” Daniel snapped to get back his attention. He walked over to where Max stood in the middle of the room. “You can't– not me. I'm no good.”
“Daniel, you are kind and beautiful and so so lovely. You are perfect.” Max brushed a thumb through Daniel's stubble.
“I– how do you know?” Daniel held back a sob. Barely. Could it have been in front of his face this whole time?
He'd wanted Max for so long and he could have had him? Had he not fucked himself up?
“How are you so sure?” Daniel asked, he needed to be sure. His heart was pounding in his chest and his knees were buckling. He needed to be sure. Before he got his hopes up. They were already up, astronomically high, but there was a point of no return. A point where if this went south it could destroy him.
“Daniel, it doesn't matter if our scents are compatible because I'm in love with you and I want to be your alpha.” Max declared, blue eyes captivating brown.
“You do?” Daniel whispered in wonder.
“I do.” Max nodded.
And well, wasn’t that more important than finding the ‘perfect’ mate? Compatibility was one thing, but being completely in love was another. Maybe Daniel didn’t have a soulmate, but… he could have Max?
“I.. I love you too.” Daniel whispered, his voice wobbled.
“I haven't been eating any pistachios.” Max declared and Daniel made a face.
“What?”
“I'm going to kiss you now.”
“You're such a-” Daniel's laugh was cut off by the press of Max's lips to his own. He cooed into the kiss. He hoped his scent was happy, warm. Because he felt like he could vibrate out of his skin right now. Daniel clutched Max impossibly closer, wrapping his legs around the alpha’s waist when he felt large hands clench his thighs. Daniel sighed happily.
The following race weekend, Daniel was happy to stay close. No one said anything however, not like when Daniel and Lewis had obviously been courting. Not like when he and Jenson had clearly broken up. No one paid any attention and Daniel wondered if it was because he and Max had always stayed close. He wondered if people already thought they were dating. Especially if Max always smelled happily like Daniel, like an alpha ready to mate.
When Daniel went to do his Silverstone tire test he wore Max’s– his alpha's balaclava. No one questioned the choice and no one even mentioned it. Everyone focused on his times and performance. It felt like being enveloped in Max’s concentrated scent, like when they fell asleep together in Daniel’s nests. That was the only time he truly knew what they smelt like, and it was lovely.
When he got behind the wheel in Monza after the summer break, he was able to ignore all of the chatter and questions. All of the looks when he and Max entered the paddock hand in hand. Daniel had smiled at the cameras and waved, like normal. Then he’d turned to Max to grin at his joke, like normal.
Exposing his neck and his new mating mark that healed into a lovely rosy patch that covered his old scars.