Chapter Text
Following the lesson was impossible.
Felix couldn’t stay focused, couldn’t listen, couldn’t take notes.
The other students were responsive and attentive, interacting with the professor and participating in the lesson, asking questions and showing interest.
While he couldn’t do anything.
He had no idea how…Hyunjin? Would have reacted?
Could he call him Hyunjin in his head?
Or should he call him Mr. Hwang?
Professor Hwang?
But Hyunjin.
Hyunjin.
Hyunjin was a really beautiful name.
But technically, he should have called him Professor or Mr., right?
And it was at this moment that his consciousness divided into two sides.
The first, the good, intelligent and correct side told him: "everything is fine, you now have found out that he is your professor - *cough* what a shame - but there is nothing you can do about it so you will maintain a professional relationship with him and behave properly, as any other person would".
But obviously the other side, the second, the horny side, told him, or rather, it was constantly yelling at him inside his head to jump on that magnificent man.
And it wasn’t correct.
He knew it was totally wrong and inadequate.
But..
Fuck.
It seemed so right just a few hours before.
The way he made him feel, the atmosphere surrounding them, the whole absurdity of their encounter. It all seemed so right, so correct, the exact way things were supposed to go.
He felt such a deep connection, so pure and natural.
Without any problems, he had listened to him for fortyfive minutes, forty fucking five minutes, talking about one of his favorite authors without even seem bored by his speech for a second.
Felix always talked a lot, he was aware of that.
Many of the boys he had dated informed him about that. They found him boring and often shut him up, without caring at all about his hobbies and the things he liked.
But to him.
To him the things Felix yapped about were interesting.
With his imposing aura, which at the same time seems so soft, so easy to destroy and unmask.
It was as if Felix could see the effort, the difficulty, that the man had behind some gestures, such as asking him for his number or the fact that he was imposing himself not to tell him what was his favorite book.
They seemed like rules that he had imposed himself.
He seemed a very reserved person, with this strange air of mystery. Felix realized only in that moment that in less than an hour the man already knew one of the things that most mattered to him, while he knew nothing about him, absolutely nothing.
And now?
Now what was he supposed to do with him?
If he had followed his instincts, his horny side would probably have prevailed.
But how would the man have reacted?
How will he act towards Felix now?
Now that they are a student and his professor.
Felix was sure he had felt a strong connection between them at the bar.
And he was sure the other man had felt it too.
When he had stopped him, grabbing abruptly his wrist between his big hands, then asking for his phone number.
He had seemed so needy.
He seemed to need so much to take courage and ask for the number of that strange boy with blond hair and a mouth too big and beautiful to not yapping continuously.
As if there were a lot of input in his head telling him to do it, "do it now, the more you think about it, the more you convince yourself not to do it."
Did he mention that he was a professor?
Did Felix get so caught up in talking about his stuff that he didn’t even heard the man mention his work?
Was Felix that looked older or the man that looked younger?
Felix watched him from afar as he finished presenting french literature and its most important writers to the class.
Compared to this morning, he had now loosened his black hair and rested on them his glasses, which could not hold all his ruffled hair, so small strands ended up on his perfect face.
They were probably reading glasses, Felix had noticed that he only wore them when he had to take a look at the book lying on the desk.
Without glasses he was even more beautiful.
He was stunning.
He screamed sex from all parts of his body, he was so elegant in every movement, so slender and delicate, a skinny body but with well-defined and powerful muscles.
And God.
His arms.
His fucking arms.
The black t-shirt he was wearing perfectly wrapped around his wide chest and squeezed his big biceps, which twitched at every little movement he made.
And only then Felix remembered that he was wearing his sweater.
Immediately his body was hit by strong chills.
The idea of having his sweater on, his professor’s sweater, who was now explaining to about 25 fucking students, and none of them had the faintest idea that the sweater he was wearing was of the new super-handsome literature professor.
This drove him crazy.
It was a strange feeling.
He felt the adrenaline flow all over his body.
Only the two of them knew.
Only the two of them knew that not even a few hours before they were sitting in a bar talking about great classics and the best works of Virginia Woolf.
Only the two of them knew that the hot black-haired professor had asked Felix for his number.
Only the two of them knew that the taller had even chased him out of the bar to ask his name.
Only. Them.
It was a secret.
They were each other’s secret.
And no one would have ever known.
Felix had his perfume on him.
But no one could have ever know that it belonged to their new professor.
No one could even suspect it because no one could have ever smell his perfume as close as Felix had.
No one could ever have his sweater in their hands.
Because they were his students.
Just like Felix.
So the right thing to do would had been to stop making these thoughts.
He was his professor.
And he was one of his students.
But he couldn’t.
He couldn’t help but feeling special.
Couldn’t stop thinking of all the chills that were running through his body at the thought of him.
Couldn’t stop thinking about how things would have went if he had missed class this morning.
How things would have went if they weren’t a student and his professor.
The man would have text him to return his sweater, washed and cleaned, and then maybe he’d come up with an excuse and invite Felix over to his house to give it back.
He would have wait for a rainy day and told him that meeting outside would have made them get too wet.
So he would have invited him to his house, where Felix’s body would not have been wet from rain, but from the dampness of Hyunjin’s tongue on his skin, from the sweat of their bodies, one clinging to the other, without the humidity of the clouds but with the one of their own breaths, hot and panting, one on the other’s neck.
"Excuse me, could you move?"
He was awakened from his thoughts by an acute and annoying voice.
The girl standing on his right looked down at him, the same bored face she had as when he arrived, waiting for Felix to make room for her to pass.
Where was she going?
He lowered his head, touching the screen of his ipad, turning it on.
01:06p.m.
Was the class over already?
He turned again to the girl with a stunned look, as she kept looking at Felix, waiting for him to move.
He moved closer to the table with the chair, making room for her and letting her out of the row of desks.
He missed a whole lesson.
A two fucking hour lesson.
This year couldn’t have started any worse.
He picked up the phone to see what Jisung was up to, not noticing a pair of eyes staring at him three rows away.
He turned off his phone with a melancholy expression after read the text from his friend where he told him he would have finished his class at 3p.m.
So now he has to spend lunch without his best friend and wait until afternoon to share all the story to his roommates.
He couldn’t even call Seungmin since he told him yesterday that he would have start classes next week.
He began to put away his things without rushing, slowly and lazily, unaware of the man who sat at the big chair just a few rows below him.
"Apparently you’re lost in your own world even when you’re supposed to follow a lesson".
Felix immediately raised his head, frightened by the voice that had just spoken to him.
He thought he was the only one left in the classroom.
But apparently he wasn’t.
There was one more with him.
Felix and his professor.
Only the two of them.
The professor was leafing through the pages of a book, one leg crossed over the other, sitting comfortably in the chair.
Felix was motionless, he did not know how to answer, how to act.
Should he have answered him as his student or as the boy he met a few hours before?
Think with your brain Felix, not your dick.
"Sorry, I didn’t sleep well last night" he decided to say.
The man did not answer, continuing to observe his book.
Felix took it as a good sign to finish putting away his things and run down the class stairs, heading for the door.
But he was stopped by a cough just before reaching the exit.
"You know,” the man started, “you have a pretty big mouth," Felix froze, "which you often use to... speak, a lot." he continued, specifying, "Yet you have not opened it once during all the lesson, nor you have followed it".
“I-“
"I’m really curious to see if you can use it properly when it comes to real literature".
Felix looked at him speechless, his eyes wide open, not knowing how to respond to the man who wasn’t even looking at him.
Oh fuck him, was he challenging him?
Was he suggesting that he was all talk and no action?
"My mouth is useful for a lot of things, Mr. Hwang," he started, making the man turn around in his direction, shocked, "surely I will not have problem in using it for talking about the real literature you have mentioned”.
Damn, temperament had never been one of his qualities.
Silence filled the room.
This time it was no longer a pleasant silence like when they were at the bar.
It was a sort of awkward silence, he had just responded to one of his teachers by alluding to what his mouth was capable of.
Fuck.
The two kept looking at each other, as if it was a contest for who gave in first.
The tension was tangible, Felix wanted to know at all costs what the man was thinking about him.
If Felix kept acting the same way he did at the bar, would the man go along with it?
What if Felix tried to flirts with him? Would he have refused him? Would it have been difficult to refuse him?
What are you feeling right now, Hwang Hyunjin?
Unexpectedly, the professor was the first to give up, looking away from the younger boy and returning to his book.
"I invite you to not pull out this attitude in front of your classmates, it would be unpleasant for both of you".
"Until a few minutes ago they were all around me while I was sitting with your sweater on".
Slam.
The man suddenly turned to Felix, closing the book abruptly, "Watch your mouth."
He was just stating fact, why he had to react like this?
"You were the first to provoke me, talking about my mouth," he said in a pungent tone, he would never have allowed himself to respond like this to a professor, but in that case it was the man that had started making allusions on his mouth.
"And I’m simply telling the truth, I have your sweater on and you have my number, after asking for it this morning, whether you like it or not this is what happened".
"We’re in a work place now, a school place, Felix." he said with gritted teeth and a stressed tone.
Of course he was stressed by the situation.
But hearing his name pronounced like that between the professor’s lips made him shiver.
"And what changes?"
"What changes?!" he asked in despair, "It changes that I am a 34 year old man and that you are one of my students, younger than what? Eight years?".
“Actually twelve..” he whispered embarrassed.
“Oh God.” he laughed hysterically and grabbed his head in desperation.
Felix held his hands to the sides, closed in tight fists, he felt so inferior compared to him.
Twelve years were not a few at all.
"Please, let’s maintain a respectful and professional relationship, I don’t even want you to feel uncomfortable in this whole situation-"
"I am not uncomfortable".
"Felix".
"Really I am not, I don’t care".
"You don’t even know what you’re talking about, you could be my younger brother".
"You have this type of kink? Interesting".
"What- Please stop that."
"I’m not doing anything".
"You’re acting like this morning".
"What’s wrong with that?".
"Everything" he said, then whispered to himself like a mantra, "Everything."
Things were starting to get tense, he didn’t like it.
He could sense the man’s frustration, and the discomfort of the position Felix was putting him in.
"Okay, I’m sorry," Felix said quietly, "you’re right, I didn’t mean to put you on a uncomfortable situation."
Hyunjin kept staring in front of him, his eyes were lost.
"It doesn’t matter, you can go now, you will have other lessons that are waiting for you".
Felix looked at him for a few more seconds and then exit the classroom with his head down, hiding a smirk on his face.
After going down the stairs and heading towards the dining area, a sense of guilt had prevailed him strongly.
The idea that he could be a burden, an obstacle for Professor Hwang invaded his thoughts.
He already seemed like a tormented man, what if with his cocky attitude made him suffer even more?
Maybe things were already complicated for him, after all he had just moved to a new university, new students, new colleagues, new ambient, everything new.
What if Felix was ruining everything?
Maybe his presence bothered him and he had made a scenario all in his head, while the older man found him an immature child.
No.
He was being dragged into a wormhole by his overthinking, after all it was useless to think about things that hadn’t happened yet.
He would have behaved correctly and respected Professor Hwang’s wishes.
Don’t give up but don’t cross the line.
If the man would have totally rejected him or have been annoyed then Felix would not have insisted.
Simple, isn’t it?
He came to this conclusion while paying for a salad at the dining hall inside the university, he was disgusted by their food but it was the only thing he could eat, otherwise he would have had to go out and buy something and he did not want to.
He didn’t even want to attend the Writing Techniques course, so as he approached Ryujin’s table, who was sitting with the other girls of his course, he decided that he would have come home once finished eating and skipped the class.
"Oh my God, and did you see how hot he is with glasses on?!".
“Oh fuck!! Yes!!”.
The girls turned to him when he took a seat at the table, "Lixie!!" they shouted in chorus.
“Ladies” he smiled, waving at them and started opening his pre-packaged salad.
"We were talking about the new professor of History of Literature," Kazuha explained, including him in the conversation.
"Ah, yes" he nodded without giving them a real reaction.
"And Ning was saying that she would let him bend her over his desk," Kazuha continued, mocking her friend.
“I mean- He’s fucking hot?” the girl replied.
"I think he might be gay," Ryujin stated.
“What?! Why?” one of the other girls asked.
"I don’t know, he gave me this first impression, he had too much style to be a straight literature teacher" Ryujin continued, reflecting on the man.
"What do you think, Felix?"
Felix tried not to choke on the salad.
He coughed, taking a sip of water from his bottle, "Sorry," he cleared his voice, "what do I think about what?".
"Of Professor Hwang"
“Ohh, ehrm, he seems nice?” he replied, unsure of what to say about the man.
"What does your gayradar say?" Ning asked.
Did he really have to answer?
"Well- Maybe? I don’t know.." he said confused.
"Surely he has money," a girl whose name he couldn’t remember exclaimed, "did you see the shoes he was wearing?! They were Rick Owens!".
"They say he washes once a month," Felix spat out of nowhere.
All the girls looked at him surprised, while he continued to eat his salad without looking up.
"What are you saying- When he passed by my desk I smelled a breathtaking cherry scent!" replied one.
"And he can’t stand girls with red hair," he added, frightening the redheaded girl who had made a disgusted face when Ryujin had said that maybe the man was gay.
This idiot girls believed anything.
The only ones he liked and who weren’t gossip-hungry snakes were Ning, Ryujin and Kazuha, the healthy ones.
They continued the conversation, while Felix did not pay attention and finished his salad, scrolling through Instagram reels.
"I don’t know what I’m going to do with Miss Yoon’s exam, we just started the year and she already wants to torture us," Ning’s words came to his ear.
He looked up at the girl, "When?" he asked.
"Wednesday!" answered his desperate friend.
He would have reviewed all the things from last year the day before the exam, which was tomorrow (fuck), hoping to pass it at least with a 60%.
After another 20 minutes sitting at that table he decided to get up, he was tired and upset by everything that had happened during the morning.
He reached the stairs, walking with the girls.
Ryujin stopped him just before he started going to the opposite part, down the stairs to reach the exit, "You’re not coming to class with us?" she asked confused.
"Oh no- I’m going home," he pointed to his head, touching his right temple in pain, "Headache".
The girl looked at him with an unconvinced look, "You sure? Just headache?" she asked raising an eyebrow.
Felix nodded with a small smile, "Pinky promise".
Ryujin nodded, sending him a flying kiss and going up the stairs in the opposite direction.
The walk back home has revealed exhausting, it seemed endless and the tiredness made everything worse.
He couldn’t wait to throw himself on the couch and finally vent to his two friends.
He needed so much to tell someone, to get advice (which by the way he probably wouldn’t have listen to) and know what they thought about all the situation..
But of course, he had also forget to take his keys this morning, so he hoped Chan was at home.
Fortunately, after ringing the bell, the door opened, a sign that his friend hadn’t left.
But the person who opened the door was not one of his two best friends, but Dino, a friend of Chan.
"Oh- Well, hi Dino" he greeted him slightly confused by see his presence.
Dino showed him a sweet smile as he watched him with big eyes, "Felix!".
Without expecting it, the tall boy embraced him in a warm hug, his strong cologne immediately invaded his nostrils.
The Felix of a day ago would probably have had red cheeks by now, chills ran through his body while the strong arms of the boy held him, head confused by the heady perfume of his colony.
But today’s Felix was almost annoyed by the gesture.
Today’s Felix would have liked if Dino didn’t hug him, if he didn’t flood Felix’s sense of smell with his strong scent, and didn’t send away the memory of his perfume.
He wanted to smell the sweet, delicate cherry scent again.
He wanted others arms around his body.
He broke away from Dino’s tight hold, smiling politely at him and heading to the living room, after taking off his boots at the entrance.
He threw his city bag and his leather jacket on the sofa, then moved to Chan who was sitting on it.
He laid a soft kiss on his friend’s head, wrapping from behind his arms around his shoulders, "Hi Channie" he said happy.
Chan raised his head, "Lixie" he smiled at him, then got up from the sofa, stretching himself slowly.
"How was the comeback?" he asked curious.
Felix coughed awkwardly, glancing in the direction of Dino, who was leaving the kitchen with a glass of water in his hand.
Chan looked at him confused but then realized Felix was trying to let him know that he wasn’t in the mood to have people around them.
"Oh- Hey Dino!" His roommate called his friend, "Felix is about to take a shower and I think I’ll go to the gym soo..” he noted, suggesting to the guy, without being too explicit, to leave.
"Yeah, no problem" he said with a sweet smile, "I’ll go home and going to take a shower too, see you tonight?".
"Where do you have to go?" Felix asked curiously, he didn’t want Dino to take Chan away from him, he needed his two best friends tonight.
"We were thinking of going to Hongdae, probably to some clubs," the boy answered unsure.
"Hongdae? For real?" he hated that place.
Chan gave him a warning look, a look that screamed: "Please don’t use your cocky attitude with him now".
Felix snorted, "I mean, don’t you want to relax tonight?".
Dino thought about it for a moment, "Hm, I don’t know".
"Well, it doesn’t matter cause I think I’m gonna stay home with the kids tonight, so we can organise something for Thursday, okay?"
“Yeah, sure” the tall guy smiled, heading for the exit after taking his shoes.
“Bye!!”
“Bye Dino!!” the boys said simultaneously.
At the same time the door opened before Dino left.
"Oh- Hey! Hi Dino!!" Jisung loud and excited voice filled the room.
God, Jisung had to come home in this exact moment?
Knowing his best friend, he would have been able to talk to Dino for another 40 minutes.
Thinks fast Felix.
He immediately walked to the soft-cheeked boy, taking his arm and moving him from the entrance, "Oh my God Ji! Did you know that Chan broke your new headphones this morning?" he lied to get his attention.
Jisung gasped dramatically, a hand pressed on his heart.
“What?! How-” he screamed.
“Yes, Chan, how could you?!” Felix supported him, faking his shock.
Dino was standing between the two with an astonished and confused look, he slowly moved away from the two boys, opening the door and leaving, mumbling a quickly "bye!".
Jisung was ready to throw himself at the older, "Do you have any idea of how much-".
"It was a lie." Felix said fast, stopping his friend, "I wanted Dino to leave, so I had to find an excuse".
“Ohw noo- Felix! Poor Dino!” Jisung stated sadly.
“Oh please, he’ll be fine” Felix said, walking to the sofa and threw himself over it, sitting comfortably and tapping on it to invite the other two to sit with him.
“Okay.” he cleared his throat, resting his feet on Jisung’s legs, who sat at his side, while Chan was laying comfortably in the armchair next to the sofa, “Now we can start our session!” the blond declared excited.
He started telling them every little detail of how he met Hyunjin at the bar, without immediately specifying that he was, in fact, his new professor.
The two boys were focused on the story, as if Felix was telling them the plot of an action film.
“And he didn’t tell me his name!”.
Jisung gasped dramatically, one of his hands covering his shocked open mouth.
“But he has your number, right?” Chan asked.
Felix sighed resigned, "And here’s the problem," the two looked at him confused.
"He won’t text me".
Jisung pushed Felix’s legs down from his lap, getting up quickly and pointing his finger at Felix, "Why shouldn’t he?! I swear Felix, if you start again with the paranoia thing, I will beat-".
“He’s my new professor.”
Silence.
Jisung froze, still standing, mouth open from shock.
On the other hand, Chan looked at him with his eyes wide open, an incredulous expression on his face.
"He’s your what?!" the two guys shouted together.
Felix hid his face in his hands, laughing in despair, "I knowww!".
“How is that even possibile?” the older asked shocked.
“Because I’m a fucking loser with no luck guys”.
“But- Like- Did he see you? In the classroom?” Jisung asked him.
“Yeah...”
“And?” they encouraged him to continue.
“And he was shocked, looking at me with horror.” he brought his knees to his chest, resting his head on them. "At the end of the lesson I thought I was left alone in the classroom and did not realize that he was still there, and when I decided to leave he stopped me, trying to provoked me. So I responded to him, maybe a little bit too harsh, and evidently my statement had made him so angry that he had to kick me out of the room, saying that I could be his little brother for the age I have and-"
Chan stopped him, “Please Felix, tell me you didn’t say anything awkward”.
“Well..”
“Oh God.”
"I just joked that he might have strange kinks for his brother!!" he justified himself.
Jisung, now sitting cross-legged on the ground, burst into a loud laughter, "Are you fucking serious?".
“All this situation it’s so embarrassing” he said, hiding his face behind the sofa cushion.
The boys remained silent for a few minutes.
Chan was the first to speak.
"Well. Let’s reflect on the situation, kids." he took a deep breath, "You now have his sweater, and he has yours and you must have to return it, and in addition to having your sweater he also has your phone number, right?".
“Yes” Felix whispered gloomy.
"And he made allusion on your mouth before you left the room but then he regretted doing it?".
Felix nodded.
"And then kicked you out, begging you to stay away from him?".
“...”
“Right, Felix?”
“Yes...”
Chan bit his lower lip while thinking, "Then that’s all, respect his decision and don’t fuck up things with him".
Jisung looked at the older in shock, "But- Why?!" he yelled confused, "He said there was a feeling between them!".
"So what? He is his professor! Do you have any idea what kind of trouble they could both get into?" Chan scolded him.
Felix remained silent, staring down at the floor.
Chan got up from the chair and sat down next to him on the sofa, "Felix," he called him, putting one of his hand on the blond’s shoulder, "I know you’re very interested to this kind of trope of the professor and the student" he started, "I imagine he’s also a handsome man and I’m sure you both had felt the connection you told us about," he paused for a moment, "But he’s your teacher."
"I know, I know." he said in a melancholy whisper.
"It’s very risky".
"But- I want to know him, I need to know him".
"Owh Lixie.." Jisung crawled to the sofa, placing his hand on his best friend’s thigh.
He then turned to the other, "I do not agree with you, Channie" the younger stated, softly caressing Felix’s leg.
Chan opened his mouth to speak and then re-closed it, taking a deep breath.
"How can you not be, Ji?" he asked confused, "He’s his fucking professor! He has a completely different life than Felix! He would lose his job! And his career would be ruined, do you even realize that?!" he said incredulous.
"But.." Felix spoke after being silent all that time, "It’s my last year".
"Exactly!!" Jisung agreed with him.
The older one shook his head resigned, "Guys I don’t know" he whispered, "I think it’s dangerous and I’m afraid you’ll get hurt, Lix".
"Hm" jisung was thinking, "Well you wouldn’t do anything wrong if you tried to flirt with him, would you?".
Both Felix and Chan looked at him confused.
"I mean," he got up from the floor, and decided to sit between the two guys on the couch, “Supposing Felix makes him understand that he is interested in him without caring that he’s his teacher," the two listened carefully, "If he wouldn’t want Felix and to risk his job, he would push him away".
"Okay and? We already know that, it doesn’t mean-" Chan tried to say, but Jisung stopped him.
"It means that," he started again, "If..." he looked at Felix with a questioning gaze.
“H-Hyunjin”.
"If Hyunjin wanted him, he would be smart enough to separate his work from his private life, and so their "frequentation" would just be a their thing, a thing, in fact, private, and other people would not care about it because they would never found it. And when Felix will have finished his last year and graduates there will not be any more problems of this kind, obviously if they still want to frequent each other".
"Hm.." Chan was thinking, a confused expression painted his face, "It might make sense but-".
"Ah! I knew it" Jisung exclaimed.
"But," Chan gave him a threatening look for interrupting him while he was talking, "This theory could only work if he is willing to risk this much, after all they only met today, he could also put boundaries now and decide to not interact with Lix until the end of the year".
"Yeah.. he’s right" Felix nodded.
"But in case he couldn’t help but try get to know you and then the thing become serious, well, at that point he would be already aware of the risk he’s running" Chan continued.
Felix snorted tired, "So? What should I do?"
The three boys looked at each other.
"We think you shouldn’t do anything," Jisung said, while Chan nodded, "Yeah Ji is right, you have to let him decide".
"Just- Be yourself, and let things take their course, do not interfere, do not force anything, if something has to happen it will".
"And please be careful, we don’t want you to come crying to us" Chan joked.
His other best friend nodded, "Right, and I’ll smash his face if he makes you drop just one tear".
Felix throw himself on the two boys' legs, laughing slightly and lying on their lap, letting out a sigh of relief, "Thank you guys".
The two seated looked at each other, then looking down at the blonde head resting on their legs, "You don’t have to thank us, Lix" Chan reminded him.
He smiled at the two guys softly, "By the way I don’t think there will be all these problems," he muttered resignedly, "I actually think he finds me immature and he doesn’t want to have nothing to do with me, indeed I probably get on his nerves, without remembering the fact that now he knows I’m one of his students".
"But have you seen yourself?! If I were a professor I would really struggle to contain myself with a student as beautiful as you" Jisung scolded him.
"And also as smart and interesting as you are" the other added.
“Pffttt, you joking guy,” the blond laughed, “you two say that only to comfort me”.
"Don’t worry if the old man doesn’t want you there’s always Dino" Jisung answered, with a smirk on his face.
Felix slapped his arm “Jisung?!”, rising from the lap of his friends.
Jisung and Chan laughed at Felix’s reaction when they had mentioned the buffy guy.
"He’s right you could give him a chance" the older confessed.
"What?!" exclaimed the blond, "I’ve been after him since we met and he never looked at me once!" he argued.
"Well today he ate you with his eyes, Lix".
"Oh- Really?" Felix’s tone completely changed with an amused one when Jisung flattered him, highlighting the interest of Chan’s friend.
“*cough* Attention whore”.
“Jisung- I swear to God-“.
Jisung hid behind Chan when Felix tried to catch him, "Worry about your old man, Lixie" he kept joking.
Chan stopped Felix from jumping on the brown-haired, "Okay, now stop kids" he said laughing.
After that long chat the three decided to go to the grocery store, since their fridge was literally empty.
Back home they ate together in their cosy kitchen, chatting, laughing and telling their day, as they had been doing for a year by now.
They were like a small family.
Felix did the dishes, Monday was his turn.
Once finished, he joined the other two in the living room, Chan was watching a film while Jisung was working on some designs with his computer, headphones on his ears, and thick glasses on his face.
He leaned on the back of the sofa, placing gentle kisses on their heads to say good night.
“‘night Lixie” they responded simultaneously.
Finally he could wash away all the tiredness accumulated during the day.
He entered the bathroom, taking all his time to remove the light make up that he had put it on this morning, then cleaned his face with the different products of his night skincare.
After a quick shower, and having carefully put his flowers cream on his body, he went to his room, finally throwing himself on his soft and comfy bed, located next to the large window of his room.
He opened Instagram to pass time since he wasn’t so sleepy.
And maybe he shouldn’t have done it.
As he scrolled through the home page, after some posts by his acquaintances and friends, one of his university’s accounts appeared on the screen.
Did he have an Instagram profile?
He immediately went into the followers of the uni profile.
After searching through all of the account who started with the letter h he finally found him.
@hwnghj
He started scrolling through his profile.
A cool and aesthetic boomer’s account, with cute reviews on the books he reads, and posts of the photos he takes with his not so little camera.
Most of the books belonged to Russian literature.
He thought how stupid he had been for not noticing it before.
It was so evident.
He obviously wasn’t one of Jane Austen’s hoes.
Worse.
He was a depressed, melancholy slut for Fedör Dostoevskij.
Oh God.
He was the perfect man for Felix.
★
It had been an harrowing day.
As he put his key in the lock to open the door, he felt fatigue flooding his body.
He took off his shoes listlessly, throwing his leather bag on the floor.
The large and empty atrium of the house was dark, the only source of light that illuminated it was from the street lamps and the moon that shone brightly in the sky.
He immediately went to the open kitchen area, taking a bottle of icy water from the fridge, then picked up his phone from his bag and walked through the long dark corridor, heading to his room.
He took the box of Sumatriptan pills from his bedside table.
He knew that after all the stress and tension he had accumulated during the day he would most likely have a migraine attack during the night, so he took the medicine to prevent it and keep it under control.
Once after taking the painkiller, he went back to the front door, the lights still off, and all the rooms still surrounded by darkness.
"Alexa turn on the house".
The white walls of the apartment finally took on color, filling the space with a warm and soft light.
He picked up his bag from the ground and went back to his room, this time throwing the bag not on the ground but on his bed.
After launching it, several objects had come out of it, the most noticeable was a large, white, fluffy object.
At the sight of the sweater he was immediately possessed by a sense of discomfort, guilt, injustice.
He took the garment and angrily threw it across the room, landing it on the ground.
Nervous, he left the room, entering the bathroom, and opening the water to fill his large bathtub.
He could still smell that floral scent, heavenly like the perfume of gardenias.
He wanted to get it out of his nostrils, out of his head.
He began to wash his face, rubbing heavily the skin to blow off steam and soak the palms of his hands with the smell of detergent, trying to replace the rich and delicate fragrance that had remained on himself after touching the sweater.
He then brushed his teeth while waiting for the tub to fill up.
He wasn’t hungry, even if all he had in his stomach was the breakfast he had this morning.
He rinsed his mouth from the pungent, fresh taste of the toothpaste, then took off his boxers and grabbed his phone.
As soon as he entered the tub his body relaxed, wrapped in warm water.
He took his phone, which he had leaned on the edge of the bathtub, he was looking at it for the first time since this morning, it often happened that when he was stressed or gloomy he did not look at it even for more than a day.
Instagram - 9m ago
@fefilix started following you.
Today, 11:57 PM
What the-
Was it him?
How the hell did he found his profile?
He took a deep breath, touching the notification and opened the app.
Oh, he shouldn’t have done that.
It took just one click to lose him in the photo gallery of the boy’s profile.
@fefilix
He had carried one of his two legs to his chest while scrolling through Felix’s account, and playing anxiously with the flesh of his inner thigh to relieve the tension he felt throughout his body.
Felix posted all kinds of pictures.
Of All. Fucking. Kinds.
He had to bite his lower lip, trying to contain himself when a photo of Felix’s bare thighs popped out on the screen.
He had almost finished seeing all the posts of the blond, and when he arrived among the last ones he wasn’t prepared for the photo that he would have seen in a few moments.
He just stared at the picture, his breathing getting heavier, his body warmer.
He stared at the puffy lips wrapped around the heart-shaped lollipop, then passed to the second photo, admiring Felix’s tongue resting on the candy, while licking it.
With an innocent but sinful look, Felix looked straight into the camera as he held the lollipop in his mouth.
Oh no.
Fuck no, not this.
He was hard.
Without really realizing it, the hand he had just laid on his thigh a few minutes ago was changing his direction, approaching his crotch.
The other hand held strongly the phone where Felix’s picture was occupying the screen.
His mind was filled with a thousand of inputs, it was as if he felt just now all the tension that had been between the two men during that day.
He returned to the third photo, the one where the boy had the lollipop in his mouth and looked at the camera with big black eyes.
He was trying to contain himself, but he couldn’t.
His mind kept presenting him images too sinful and completely wrong.
Wrong.
What he was doing was wrong.
It was wrong that his hand had grabbed his cock, starting to massage the base of it, moving the water around his body.
It was wrong that he was imagining those boba eyes watching him from below, sitting on the ground between his legs and with his thick thighs pressed against each other.
It was wrong that he imagined him wearing that knee-high socks that he had shown in one of his posts.
It was all wrong.
But he couldn’t help it.
He thought about how heavenly the feeling of his puffy pouty lips would have been around his dick, the boy’s tongue licking from the base to the tip.
He was sure that he wouldn’t shut up even with a cock in his pretty mouth, he would probably have mumbled small whimper while sucking it.
For what he had known of him on that day he was sure the boy was a little brat, and the idea of it turned him on, so fucking much.
He began to pump his cock faster, the phone now abandoned on the edge of the tub, his eyes closed while letting out low moans.
The water moved sharply around his body, due to the fast movements of his hand.
Images of Felix stuffing hungrily himself with his dick crossed his mind, increasing his body temperature.
If only he could have really had him between his legs, he would have shook his hands in his fluffy blonde hair, pulling his locks while fucking his mouth roughly.
He thought about how his colleagues, or his students, would have react if they had known.
If they had known that at that moment he was jerking off to the idea of his new student sucking him greedily, maybe under the classroom desk, between one class and the other.
The adrenaline of getting caught gave him strong chills.
He began to moan loudly when in his mind appeared the image of their bodies intertwined with each other, Felix lying on his desk, while he sink fiercely inside him, with precise and dry thrusts, reaching his most hidden and pleasant parts.
"Professor.." in his head echoed the deep and warm voice of the boy who in his imagination was looking at him with doe pleading eyes, lips red and swollen, with blushing cheeks that decorated his beautiful freckles.
He came strongly at the thought, staining the water with his cum and abandoning his head backwards.
He stared at the ceiling while waiting for his breath to calm down.
And shortly after, he heard it coming.
The sense of guilt.
The realization of what he had just done.
Did he really-
Did he really turned on by looking at simple photos? As if he were a sixteen years old teenager in puberty? And on top of that, did he really jerked off to one of his students? Imagining him bended over the classroom desk while thrusting into him?
What the fuck was wrong with him?
How did this 22 year old boy had get inside his head in just one day?
Hyunjin, by now, was no longer interested in finding a partner, he didn’t want relationships or anything else, he had resigned himself to being alone after what had happened in the past.
And yet - before discovering he’ll be one of his new students - after seeing his stunning face in that bar he couldn’t help but interact with the boy.
He couldn’t help but sit there, on the uncomfortable chair of the cafe, listening to that beautiful boy he had just met talking non stop.
He hated interacting with strangers, he hated people invading his personal space and people who talk too much without knowing him.
And yet.
Yet with that boy, so different from him, it had all gone in the opposite way from what he was expecting.
He didn’t recognise himself anymore, what he wanted or what he don’t.
Did he- Did he really chase him out of the bar to get his name?
If he wouldn’t had been 12 years younger than him and not one of his students, would he have contacted him?
After giving him his sweater back, would’ve he looked for him again?
Would’ve he liked to meet him? To know him?
He couldn’t help but admit the fact that the boy intrigued him.
Because he realized that after hearing him speak continuously for 40 minutes of one of the greatest writers in England, exposing accurate and profound analyses, he wanted to ask for more.
He wanted to hear his opinions about other authors, other books.
He wanted to hear his deep and sweet voice tell him about every single thought on his mind.
He had never found anyone with such interesting ideas about literature.
But no matter how much the boy attracted him, both mentally and physically, he couldn’t do anything with him.
He couldn’t fucking allow it.
He could not allow himself to make mistakes, he had just arrived in his new workplace and there was already a problem.
A huge problem.
Felix was a danger to him.
He was chaotic, noisy, too young, too energetic, everything that could have only ruined him.
He should had marked boundaries between them right away so he would be safe, so his career would be safe.
He should had stayed away from the boy, continuing his life unhindered.
Yeah.
It was the right thing to do.
He took his phone and typed the text he has to send and then removed him from his followers.
Good.
He’d be fine now.
He stepped out of the bathtub, looking remorsefully at the white spots in the water.
He dried his body, put on cream, and went back to his room, laying comfortable in his soft and cleaned sheets, a book in his hands and his mind finally relaxed.
He fell asleep while reading a few minutes later, tired from all the day and convinced in his decision to immediately put distance between him and the blond.
Except that Hyunjin didn’t know that fate wasn’t on his side that time.