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Chapter 8: A Temporary Stand-In For Your Face

Summary:

The chapter where Gerard is a flustered mess and goes to the beach.

Notes:

Sexual content warning.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

The next morning, Gerard's heart hammered at his ribs as he got ready for work. He hadn't slept well, his mind racing with thoughts of Frank and the conversation they’d had. He was embarrassed by how he behaved, how he broke down so easily in front of Frank, but somehow Frank didn’t make him feel annoying or like a burden once. They watched Star Wars movies as if nothing happened, Frank even drove him back to his apartment with some dinner to heat up when he got home, even if it was three o'clock in the morning.

 

As he stepped out of his apartment, prepared to walk to work, he was startled to see Frank standing by his car, holding a familiar Starbucks cup in one hand.

 

"Morning, G," Frank said, offering a small smile. "Thought you might need this."

 

"Frankie…” Gerard blinked in surprise, then accepted the cup, his hands trembling slightly. “You’ve done so much already.”

 

Frank shrugged, gesturing to the passenger car door he began to open for him. "How about you get in? We've got to get to work."

 

It was as if Gerard did nothing to weaken their relationship; Frank was using his nickname, buying him coffee, and being so… casual? Gerard didn’t know if that made him relieved or frightened.

 

They drove in comfortable silence, the tension from the previous days slowly melting away. Gerard glanced at Frank, who was focused on the road, occasionally tapping his fingers on the steering wheel to the rhythm of the music playing softly on the radio. Frank's presence was comforting, yet Gerard's mind buzzed with thoughts of how much he depended on this friendship.

 

When they arrived at work, Frank parked the car and turned to Gerard, sucking on a cigarette and practically blowing smoke in his face. "Lunch break, my treat. Sound good?"

 

Gerard nodded, a faint smile playing on his lips. "Yeah, that sounds good."

 

When lunchtime finally rolled around, Frank and Gerard slipped away from the office chaos and headed to a small, cozy café nearby. The place was retro, with mild music playing in the background and the warm aroma of freshly baked pastries filling the air.

 

Frank ordered their food and led Gerard to a corner table, tucked away from the rest of the patrons. As they sat down, Frank reached into his bag and pulled out a small sketchbook.

 

"I got you this," Frank said, handing it to Gerard. "I thought maybe you could use a fresh start, for your art."

 

Gerard took the sketchbook, noticing how it was a hardcover and lacked the cheap spiral most of his sketchbooks had, his eyes widening in surprise. "Frank, this is... thank you."

 

Frank smiled, his eyes twinkling. "I figured we could start over too, you know?” He paused, scratching at the inked flesh on his neck as he spoke. “I remember when we first met, I laughed at you. Not to mention on a day that already seemed pretty shit for you at the time, something about the boss being on your ass and you coming into work like a fucking used mop, no offense.”

 

Gerard chuckled, his nerves easing slightly. “None taken.”

 

Frank gave him a knowing smile, his hand digging in his pocket before he lit a cigarette, most likely to ease his nerves. He spoke around the smoke, his eyes bouncing between the employees at the front counter and Gerard. “My point is, I want this to be what we look back on, you know? I became your friend ‘cause I felt bad for treating you like shit, but now it’s so much more different than that.”

 

Gerard carefully placed the brand-new sketchbook on the table before him, his palm stroking the rough cover as he spoke. “Okay, we can do that. I sorta regret the way I spoke to you that day, too.” He paused, hesitating and fixing his eyes on the window. “I-I was having a shit day, boss wanted to lay me off if I didn’t put in some more work on this project. Wanna know something silly?”

 

Frank noticeably relaxed, taking a long drag before flicking the ashes in his coffee cup, tilting his head at Gerard when he encouraged him to continue. “Hm?”

 

“I was barely working that month because I lost my favorite pen.”

 

“Seriously?”

 

“Seriously.”

 

Frank's face lit up with laughter, his hand running through his shabby mohawk as he shook his head in disbelief. He took another drag before speaking again, his voice husky from the smoke. "I get it. I remember losing my favorite guitar pick and not playing for weeks. When I replaced it, I bled all over my guitar strings because my calluses were gone."

 

“Guess it’s a bit unmotivating, huh?” He was a bit comforted knowing Frank could relate, and share his awkward story to make him feel better. Gerard was bright red in embarrassment, thinking back on it now entirely humiliating. He shyly glared at Frank, his fingers twisting around his scarf as he spoke.

 

“What I’m trying to get at is, if it wasn’t for you — and our boss — I wouldn’t have continued to work, to draw… Most likely would’ve gotten fired, and probably would have had to move back into my mom’s basement. You’re the only thing getting me through this shit life I have. That’s why I can’t afford to lose you, even if this relationship doesn’t mean this much to you — “

 

“Hey, I never said that,” Frank took one last drag of his cigarette before putting it out in his cup, his hand reaching for Gerard’s before he could respond. “This means a lot to me, too. I wouldn’t have forgiven you if that was the case.”

 

Each time Frank touched him felt like a shock straight to Gerard’s brain, his eyelids squinting slightly as he pressed back, his body wanting to hide away from the world and have Frank’s touch just to himself. It was mind-numbing.

 

“Okay, I believe you.”

 

They lingered in the café for a while longer, sharing stories and laughter. And Frank never let go of his hand. It was sort of grounding at this point. It was like Gerard’s lifeline, his stability. When the time came to return to work, they walked back together, the conversation light and easy.

 

Back at the office, they parted ways, but not before Frank gave Gerard a reassuring pat on the shoulder. "I’ll see you later, okay?"

 

Gerard nodded, a smile tugging at his lips. "Yeah, sounds good."

 

Over the next two weeks, their bond only grew stronger. They spent lunch breaks together, exchanged late-night texts, and even hung out on weekends. Gerard found himself looking forward to every moment spent with Frank. The dull ache in his chest that had been his constant companion for so long was slowly being replaced by something warm and hopeful. He didn’t need drawings or photos. He had these memories now. Even if it wasn’t enough, Gerard was content with what he had. He didn’t want to risk losing Frank again.

 

Despite this, he couldn’t stop himself from drawing Frank occasionally, but instead of keeping them and drooling over them, he typically gave them to Frank. He sometimes took suggestions, like this one cartoony drawing he was working on of Frank was him, but as the vegan vampire. He had long fangs, his mohawk was now slick down on his head, and he wore a less punky attire, more vintage.

 

Gerard was leaning back in his chair, his sketchbook pressed to his knees since he had his legs to his chest. He constantly tried to make himself smaller when he drew, so entranced in the drawing, that he practically disappeared into another world. It took a lot to get him out of his trance, so much so, that he didn’t even notice Frank braiding some of Gerard’s hair while speaking to him.

 

“Geraaard…” Frank released the clumsy braid, his fingers now tugging at the strands before he started to kick at his chair. When his pen flinched under his grip, Gerard glanced up, his eyes like saucers when he realized how close Frank was.

 

“Yeah? Yes, Frankie?”

 

“It’s getting warmer,” Frank murmured, glimpsing at Gerard’s sketchbook before snatching it, his smile widening across his lips as he viewed the drawing.

 

“Yeah? Frank, it’s not done, give it — “

 

“G, I bought this! Plus it’s me, so…” If it was even possible, he widened his dopey smile further, his finger tracing the thick lines on the page. “It’s Friday, it’s warmer, so, you’re road-tripping with me.”

 

“I-I get that, but I’m not done!” Gerard flailed his arms a bit, grabbing at the sketchbook before yanking it out of Frank’s grasp. He paused for a brief moment, his eyes fixed on the drawing before he murmured, staring at Frank slightly puzzled. “Road-tripping? Where?”

 

Frank glimmered at him, standing from the chair he stole from a nearby cubicle and placing a hand in Gerard’s hair, scruffing at the top strands. “Don’t ask questions! Just be ready at six, okay?”

 

“Uh, okay? But — “

 

The hand in his hair was suddenly pressed to his lips, Gerard — for once — having to look up at Frank to make eye contact. He was still giving him that wide smile, his face practically glowing as he whisper-spoke. “Shh, six o'clock, okay?”

 

Gerard only nodded.

 

⋆⋅☆⋅⋆

 

The sun was beginning to dip below the horizon when Gerard heard the knock on his apartment door. His heart skipped a beat as he hurried to open it, revealing Frank standing there with a deviant grin, his hands hidden behind his back.

 

“Are you ready?”

 

Gerard nodded shyly, reaching for his disheveled bag.

 

“Wait!”

 

Gerard stopped, straightening his back and peering at Frank through jet-black strands of hair that fell in his face. Frank revealed his hands, keeping his wimpy smile despite the softness in his eyes.

 

“I wanted you to have this leather one. It will hold up better.”

 

“Fraaankie,” Gerard blubbered his name, a tiny smile creasing at the ends of his lips as he approached him. The taller male carefully accepted the bag, his gaze taking in the cracked leather and the texture in his palms. He couldn’t help but feel overwhelmed by Frank’s adoring gift-giving.

 

Frank, smiling in pure accomplishment, leaned against the doorframe, waving a hand as he spoke. “Well? Put all your stuff in it! I want to see if it holds up.”

 

Gerard nodded, his heart pounding with anticipation. After moving his belongings to his new bag, they headed down to Frank’s car and shared a cigarette. It didn’t take Gerard too long to realize Frank was driving them to the beach, a place he scarcely remembered going to. He wasn’t a fan of swimming. But he would hold his breath for Frank. The drive to the beach was filled with the hum of the radio and their laughter, the cityscape gradually giving way to open roads and the promise of the ocean ahead.

 

By the time they arrived, the sky was a canvas of pink and orange hues, the beach was nearly deserted. Frank parked the car and they made their way to a secluded spot, the sound of the waves crashing against the shore creating a serene backdrop. Frank spread out the blanket, and they settled down, the cool sand beneath them contrasting with the warmth of the evening air.

 

Frank rummaged in his bag, cracking open two beers and handing one to Gerard. Gerard merrily accepted the beverage.

 

“This is… nice.” Gerard’s voice was soft with apparent gratitude. He felt amazing, he felt like he had won. The moon began to peer over the waves and everything just felt so perfect.

 

Frank smiled, his gaze lingering on Gerard for a moment before he spoke. "I wanted us to have a place where we could just... be ourselves. No work, no worries. Just us."

 

Gerard's heart swelled at Frank's words, and he reached out, placing his hand over Frank's. "Thank you. For everything." He paused, suddenly nervous by his confidence. His hand on Frank’s became so intimate, forward even, that he was painfully aware of the warmth. “I-I mean, like, more than just this. For giving me a chance, for being there.”

 

Frank's fingers intertwined with Gerard's, his touch sending a warm shiver down Gerard's spine. They sat in comfortable silence for a while, sipping their beers and watching the sunset, the sky now a deep shade of purple. The air was filled with the scent of saltwater and the distant cry of seagulls, creating a tranquil, almost magical atmosphere. This was perfect. Like, better than earlier perfect!

 

As the last rays of sunlight faded, Frank turned to Gerard, a serious expression on his face. "There's something I've been wanting to tell you, G."

 

Gerard's breath caught in his throat, his mind racing with possibilities. It sounded so unlike Frank. As if he was just as nervous as Gerard was. He didn’t want to sound desperate, or even hopeful, but it almost sounded like the beginning of a confession. Gerard couldn’t help to begin to lose that yearning, doubt settling like a gigantic wave. Why would Frank give him a chance after destroying their trust? Was it wrong that he desired to hold onto that hope?

 

"What is it?" he finally questioned, his gaze glued to his hand that cradled the beer close to him, seeking comfort. He swore Frank squeezed his hand a little tighter.

 

“Okay, I-I swear I’m being serious when I say this, okay?” There were apparent nerves strung onto his words, Gerard beginning to feel the bile rise in his throat as he attempted to remain composed. He noticed Frank place his beer in the sand, his gaze adjusted closely on Gerard’s face.

 

“Okay?” He didn’t mean to sound so confused, but his voice was trembling along with his body. The tension in the air was suffocating him.

 

Frank took a deep breath, his eyes never leaving Gerard's as he tumbled over his speech, gnawing at his lip ring between words. "These past few weeks... they've been amazing. You've become so important to me, more than I ever expected, especially since this entire thing was me feeling bad for you. And I can't keep pretending that what I feel for you is just friendship, it’s more than wanting to take care of you from time to time as a friend. I realized this a while ago, but I was kinda struck by your… you know," He used his other hand to run through the strands of hair atop his head, his mohawk a bit messier than usual. “Your obsession? If anything, it may have fueled my feelings a bit more. I-I mean you admired me so fucking much it was kind of sick, but like a good sick? Basically, what I’m trying to say is — “

 

“I-I like you too,” Gerard blurted, his face burning as he inched closer, his lips practically shuddering as he tried to stumble more words, to just explain how much he loved Frank, that like was just a small word and it barely covered his feelings. Fuck, like couldn’t begin to even explain his feelings for Frank! “I-I’m in love with you, Frank. And I’m being serious, too.”

 

Frank stared for what felt like years. It was as if every thought in his head he was attempting to decode in his brain silently. Gerard’s head was full of the sound of the waves, the sound of their breathing, and the feeling of their hands pressed so tightly together. And also pure panic.

 

It was so sudden, the feeling of Frank’s hand pressing away the tears running down Gerard’s pale cheeks, their foreheads sliding into place, their breaths practically mingling into one. It was so intimate. Gerard felt like this was all he needed: to have Frank this close. Frank felt like a pure lifeline to his soul.

 

“I fucking love you, too. Gerard.”

 

Forget what Gerard said earlier; this was awesome, this was everything he needed! This was what life was worth living for! He loved the world, he loved the New York rain, he loved irritating people like Pete, he loved the miserable guy at the coffee shop who had his order memorized, he loved Ray and Mikey, he loved the bored lady who sold him art supplies, he loved his family, and he loved this punk-freak, Frank. His savior, his world, his everything. Like, seriously. This was perfect.

 

Frank's smile was radiant, and he closed the distance between them, capturing Gerard's lips in a tender, sincere kiss. They were both smiling so it was kind of awkward, their lips stretched and pressing against each other in giddiness. Gerard became even giddier upon feeling his lip ring there, his dreams coming true of all the wondering he did about the metal there. He remembers spending time making sure the light hit the jewelry just right in every drawing of Frank he sketched.

 

As the world around them blurred into the background, their smiles gently dimmed, their breaths became heavy, their hearts pounded with anticipation, and their lips lingered in a moment of unfiltered sincerity. Gerard wanted to feel this way forever. He almost wished to knit their lips together like this eternally. Was that weird? He wasn’t sure. But what he was sure of was Frank was definitely into him, like crazy into him. He had never felt him so close before, all of his body pressed against him with certainty as he pulled Gerard — somehow — closer.

 

The kiss was suddenly interrupted by Frank’s laughter, his hand finding Gerard’s clumsily. “C’mere,” he practically mouthed the demand against Gerard’s mouth, tugging and pulling at his hand. Frank hauled both of their bodies to their feet, wasting no time before dragging Gerard towards the waves.

 

“Wait, wait, Frank, were not even in bathing suits — ”

 

"Shh! Just come on!" The sound of crashing waves filled the air as Frank grabbed Gerard's hand, pulling him into the cool, refreshing water. New York was starting to warm up, but the ocean still held the chill from recent downpours. As they waded deeper, Gerard couldn't stifle a squeaky scream, which only made Frank cackle, like a bent-over-the-knee laugh. Both of them were shouting, partially from the cold and partially from the sensation of their clothes sticking to their bodies. Gerard just blundered out Frank’s name over and over.

 

Frank pulled them into the water until only their hips were visible, still holding Gerard’s hand. He then drew Gerard closer, wrapping his arm around his neck, calling him a dork before kissing him. Despite already sharing their first kiss, it still stunned him, Gerard being uncertain where to put his hands. Frank surely had no problem with that, he thought. His hands were running through the hair on the back of Gerard’s head, lightly tugging there. Luckily, he didn’t have to dwell on it much before a wave crashed into them, Gerard’s arms coaxing around Frank before they were almost toppled over. Frank practically hollered and burst into laughter, Gerard unable to conceal his honking laugh that bubbled from his chest.

 

The sight of Frank, so incredibly carefree, was something he had never witnessed before. It was as if relief swept over him, washing away all his tension and doubt in mere moments. Until Frank splashed him with ice-cold water. Gerard practically hissed like a feline before realizing he should get him back, which he did, eventually.

 

The playful water fight continued, their laughter echoing over the empty beach, the sound of waves crashing around them. Gerard couldn’t remember the last time he felt so alive, so untroubled. Every splash, every touch from Frank sent a jolt of excitement through him, his heart pounding, not just from the cold, but from the sheer joy of being with Frank like this.

 

Frank's mischievous grin faded as he pulled Gerard close again, their wet clothes clinging to their bodies, adding an extra layer of intimacy. Gerard could feel the warmth of Frank’s breath against his lips, the cold of the water a distant memory as their bodies pressed together. Frank’s hands slipped down to Gerard’s waist, holding him firmly as their lips met once more. This kiss was deeper, more intense, filled with all the passion they had been holding back for so long. Gerard’s hands found their place in Frank’s hair, tugging lightly as he lost himself in the sensation, in the taste of saltwater and the softness of Frank’s lips.

 

Frank pulled back slightly, his eyes dim and filled with craving. “Come with me,” he whispered, his voice hoarse. He didn’t wait for Gerard’s response, just grabbed his hand and started leading him out of the water. Gerard followed, his heart racing, a mixture of excitement and nerves bubbling up inside him.

 

As they reached the shore, Frank pulled Gerard towards his car, their hands still intertwined, the wet sand sticking to their feet. Gerard’s mind was racing, his body tingling with anticipation. Frank opened the back door of his car, pausing to glance at Gerard, his eyes filled with something Gerard couldn’t quite decipher—an intense mix of lust, affection, and maybe a little bit of nervousness too.

 

“Are you okay with this?” Frank asked, his voice softer now as if he was giving Gerard an out, a chance to back away if this was too much.

 

Gerard’s response was immediate. “Yeah, yeah.” He bounced his head in a little nod that made him seem as if he was agreeing to a project or arranging plans with a friend.

 

That was all Frank needed to hear. With a grin that was equal parts wicked and loving, he tugged Gerard into the backseat, the door slamming shut behind them. Frank had Gerard pressed to the backseat in moments, hovering over him and stealing his breath away. Gerard's body responded eagerly, his jeans growing uncomfortably tight, his face flushed with a heat that rivaled the setting sun. It was a level of intimacy he had only briefly encountered once before, during a clumsy high school game of spin-the-bottle, or the innocent pecks on the cheek from his mom (which, thinking about it now, gross).

 

The confined space made everything feel more intense, their bodies pressed close together. Frank wasted no time, his hands already tugging at Gerard’s wet shirt, pulling it over his head before tossing it aside. Gerard’s breath hitched as Frank’s fingers skimmed over his skin, leaving trails of fire in their wake. He was suddenly aware of how vulnerable he was, how exposed he felt, but Frank’s gaze was filled with so much desire, so much affection, that all his insecurities began to melt away.

 

Frank’s hands were everywhere — cupping Gerard’s face, running through his hair, gripping his shoulders. Their lips moved together with an intensity that sent shivers down Gerard’s spine. Frank pulled back just enough to look into Gerard’s eyes, his breath warm against Gerard’s lips. “Are you sure you’re okay with this?”

 

Gerard nodded, his voice barely a whisper. “Yeah,” Uncertainty washed over his face despite his casual response. Frank gave him an unsure look, quirking an eyebrow as he stroked the side of Gerard’s face. Gerard paused, shaking his head as he muttered. “Yeah, yes, just… I’ve dreamed of this, Frankie. For so long.”

 

Frank smiled, pressing a tender kiss to Gerard’s forehead as he whispered, “Really?” Gerard felt insanely red, his hands wanting desperately to hide from Frank’s fanciful glimmer and dopey smile. Frank’s hands stilled from frantic searching to a tender caress. Gerard's nerves began to settle, replaced by a warmth that spread through him as Frank resumed their kiss, slower this time, savoring every moment. Gerard’s hands found their way to Frank’s cheeks, gripping his face as if afraid to let go as if this wasn’t real.

 

“Me too,” Frank whispered, his voice pinched as if he was scared to admit it aloud.

 

It was intoxicating, the way Frank touched him, the way he kissed him as if he couldn’t get enough. Frank’s hands found the button of Gerard’s jeans, fumbling slightly in his haste. Gerard moaned into Frank’s mouth as he felt the rough brush of denim being peeled away, leaving him bare. He barely had time to feel self-conscious before Frank’s hand was on his cock, his underwear to his knees, stroking him with a maddeningly slow rhythm that had Gerard gasping for air, his hands clutching at Frank’s shoulders.

 

“Fuck, Frank,” Gerard groaned, his hips bucking up into Frank’s hand.

 

Frank just smirked, leaning in to press his lips against Gerard’s ear. “Yeah?” he murmured, his voice low and rough. “This good?”

 

Gerard could only nod, his breath coming in short, ragged gasps. Frank’s mouth was on his neck, sucking and biting gently, marking him as his hand continued its torturous rhythm. Gerard was lost, completely at Frank’s mercy, every touch, every kiss sending him closer to the edge. His face felt so hot, Frank’s hand felt so hot, his stomach was roaring in heat and he felt sticky with sweat. His hand reached to cover his face, embarrassed by the spurts of moans that managed to tumble from his damp lips, but Frank caught sight of that.

 

Somehow, he managed to slow the pace further, each tug to his cock making Gerard shiver. “Don’t cover your mouth, let me hear you, baby.” He tightened his fist, his thumb pressing into the head, making Gerard whine. Hearing the noise he made caused Gerard’s ears to go red. The pet name was enough to make him finish, but the pace made him want more.

 

Reluctantly, Gerard removed his hand from his mouth, reaching for Frank’s shoulder with more vigor. His teeth dug into his bottom lip, making Frank peer at him, widening his smile as he whispered. “What do you want, G? Tell me, don’t be shy.”

 

“More, fuck, Frank — ah — please?” Gerard despised the sound of his voice, but Frank's intense gaze and tender touches eased his insecurities. Frank responded with a silly smile and pressed a hand against Gerard’s soft belly, kissing his chest as he quickened the pace.

 

He kept his hand in a tight fist, somehow pressing tighter when he reached his tip, causing Gerard to squirm and moan. When he felt a hand reach his balls, his eyelids snapped shut and all he could feel was Frank; he didn’t care about being naked in the backseat of his car, or that his hair was damp, or that Frank’s wet jeans were making him shiver. All he could feel was the bliss of his dreams coming true. This was ten times better than his own hand, ten times better than his fantasies.

 

“Frankie, I-I’m so close,” Gerard gasped, his hands gripping the fabric of the seat, trying to hold on, but it was impossible with the way Frank was touching him, with the way his breath felt hot against his skin. He was sucking at his neck again, leaving blossoming bruises there that Gerard knew he was going to cherish for the rest of his life.

 

“Come on, G… Finish for me,” Frank responded by increasing the pace of his hand, his lips finding Gerard’s once more. Gerard’s body tensed, his mind going blank as he reached his climax, Frank’s name spilling from his lips in a breathless moan, right into his mouth. Frank held him through it, his hand slowing its pace, drawing out every last bit of pleasure until Gerard was left trembling and spent, his head falling against the seat with labored breaths.

 

“Was that okay?”

 

Frank’s voice was enough to pull him out of his cloudy mind, his head lifting from the seat and meeting eyes with hazel. Frank was cleaning his hand with a tissue, grinning at him. Gerard couldn’t help the shy smile that tugged at his lips, his hand sliding across Frank’s cheek and along the back of his neck, subtly playing with the hair there.

 

“Idiot,” was all he murmured before kissing Frank, open-mouth yet still intimate and peaceful. Gerard pulled away with practical stars in his eyes, his voice soft as he whispered-screamed against Frank’s lips. “Of course that was okay, more than okay! But… it’s your turn.” He tried to sound smooth, but Frank was sucking on his neck like a leech and making him squirm in the afterglow.

“Yeah?” Frank mouthed against his skin, kissing close to Gerard’s ear and making him wriggle. Gerard subtly shoved Frank away, unable to stop his awkward laugh as he murmured, hardly able to hold eye contact. “Is it too forward to want to… um — “

“To want to what, G?”

 

“Suck you,” Gerard couldn’t finish his request, his breath hitching in his throat as he attempted to distract himself by pulling his boxers back up to his waist. He had never given someone a blowjob, but a part of him desired to return the favor while also being able to taste him. The idea felt so intimate, it felt as if butterflies were fluttering in his stomach just at the thought.

 

He could feel Frank grinning at him, somehow still startling Gerard when he moved, seating himself properly and pulling off his shirt. Gerard’s eyes immediately locked onto pierced nipples. If he hadn’t just had the best orgasm of his life, he was sure he would be hard all over again.

 

“Well? C’mere.”

 

Attempting his very best not to look flustered, Gerard tried to get comfortable, letting his damp jeans sit on his waist unbuttoned as he leaned over, his face inches away from the tented denim of Frank’s crotch. Peeking up at him, Gerard swallowed hard at his hungry gaze, the way his hazel eyes looked so endearing driving him insane. He unbuttoned his jeans, hoping to relieve some of the apparent pressure. A satisfied smile pulled at the ends of his lips when he heard a pleasant sigh above him.

 

When he pulled at the waistband of his boxers and locked eyes with his cock sprung in front of his face, he felt as if he saw God. The streetlight caught on the head, which was wet there with precum. Gerard felt his mouth salivate, his face leaning forward as he licked there, catching all the flavor on his tongue, tasting him. He kissed the tip softly, grinning when he felt Frank’s hands stroke along the sides of Gerard’s head until pulling back some of his jet-black hair.

 

Gerard wanted so badly to give Frank the best experience, but he could only rely on his knowledge from porn and magazines. He didn’t want to ask for help, not when Frank was so eager, his hands tight in his hair and his cock swollen red right in front of Gerard's eyes. So, he opened his jaw, wrapping his lips around the head, his tongue rubbing at the skin that felt so hot on his lips. He carefully pressed further, attempting to widen his mouth when his lips were sliding down his shaft, his tongue slightly floundering before stilling. He felt the weight on his tongue, the feeling enough to drive him crazy, but then he remembered the need to breathe.

 

He came back up, his vision blurry with tears as he tried not to cough, his hand wrapping around the base of Frank’s cock as he tried to regain his breath. Frank was lightly petting him now, but Gerard was too scared to look at him again. Instead, he silenced his panting by stuffing his mouth once more, attempting to take him further.

 

He was kinda proud that he hadn’t choked yet, but when Frank slightly rocked his hips and groaned, Gerard squinted his eyelids shut at how much it tickled, the need to cough making him adjust his head, only to feel Frank pulling him off. Gerard was breathing hard, his face flushed bright red when he noticed saliva dripping from his mouth, his hand quickly wiping it away. He almost jumped when Frank grabbed his face, but delicately, like his touch was barely there, yet just enough to hold his gaze.

 

“Take it slow, G,” he whispered, still holding a sincere smile as he pressed a thumb to Gerard’s lips, pushing lightly. It took him a moment to realize what he was implying, Gerard blushing furiously as he carefully parted his lips. He felt the rough pad of Frank’s thumb press onto the middle of his tongue, Gerard carefully closing his lips around the skin, his eyebrows quirked in a is this right? sort of way.

 

“Good, now relax.” He slid his thumb deeper, following the middle of his tongue as he stroked his face, tucking some of his hair behind Gerard's ear. He almost wanted to cry because of how generous and patient Frank was, a warm feeling settling down his skin seeing Frank was still nervous, his teeth fiddling with his lip ring in habit. He hadn’t wanted his help, but something about how he spoke and cared for him made him willing. “Breathe through your nose, baby.”

 

Gerard followed each of his commands until he could properly take two fingers, often closing his eyelids when Frank’s gaze became too much. When Frank thought he was ready, he carefully removed his fingers and guided him back to his cock, still hard and waiting for any friction. It made G feel a bit guilty, his mouth immediately becoming pliant to relieve the guy driving him crazy, who deserved everything, and Gerard was willing to give all of himself for him.

 

He wanted so badly to whisper how much he loved him, how he could see the beauty in his trust, and how he yearned for this very moment; but then he remembered he had Frank’s dick and his mouth. When he sinks down this time, he feels almost rewarded at the groan that flutters past Frank’s damp lips, his eyelids falling closed and his hand tightening in Gerard's hair. The noise goes to Gerard’s head immediately, but it only made it halfway before he felt the urge to gag, so he pulled back again and made up for what his mouth couldn’t reach with his hand.

 

It was hard to ignore Frank making noises, no matter if it was a sigh, or his head hitting the seat, Gerard just wanted to drink every moment of it. Not only did he want to taste him, but he almost wanted to be a spectator, so he could properly relish in Frank’s magnificence.

 

Gerard could hardly think straight with the heat of Frank's body so close, the deep groans spilling from his throat, echoing in the quiet of the car. It felt like a dream, but one so real it set his nerves alight. His fingers gripped Frank's thighs, feeling the tension rippling under his palms, every flex and shift of muscle adding to the strange excitement that buzzed through him.

 

He tried to take it slow, to focus on Frank’s instructions and let them guide him. He breathed through his nose, relaxing his throat as much as he could, the salty taste of Frank’s skin lingering on his tongue. It wasn’t perfect, but the soft grunts and the way Frank’s hand trembled as it held his hair were enough to convince Gerard that maybe, just maybe, he wasn’t completely terrible at this.

 

Frank’s hips bucked again, involuntary, and Gerard couldn’t help but squirm, the motion startling him. He pulled back a bit, his lips wet and tingling, his cheeks burning in embarrassment. “Sorry,” he mumbled, feeling the heat of Frank’s gaze burning into him, a flush spreading across his own chest.

 

“G, you’re doing great,” Frank panted, his voice hoarse yet gentle. His hand slipped down to Gerard’s cheek, thumb rubbing the flushed skin as he smiled down at him, and Gerard felt that soft warmth all over again — like Frank wasn’t just watching him, but seeing him. “You’re perfect.”

 

Perfect. The word stuck in Gerard’s head, and it sent a shiver up his spine. He wanted to be perfect for Frank. Desperately. There was something about this, about Frank being so open and raw in front of him, that felt so precious. He couldn’t let him down.

 

He leaned in again, kissing along Frank’s length, feeling the warmth of his cock twitch against his lips. This time he let himself move slower, focusing more on the reactions — each hitch in Frank’s breath, every quiet moan that escaped his lips. Gerard’s hand, still wrapped around the base, gave a soft squeeze, feeling the pulse of life there as he dragged his lips and tongue back over the head.

 

He felt Frank's fingers tangle tighter in his hair, but the tug wasn’t demanding — it was guiding, a quiet encouragement. And when Frank whispered, “That’s it, baby, just like that,” it made Gerard’s chest tighten in the best way.

 

Gerard kept at it, letting Frank’s moans drive him. He couldn’t take him all the way in, not yet, but he compensated by stroking the shaft where his mouth left off. His lips felt swollen, and his jaw ached, but none of that mattered. It wasn’t about him — it was about Frank. About hearing his soft gasps grow louder, about the way Frank's body tensed under his touch, the way his hips moved without him even realizing.

 

Frank’s breathing was getting faster, more erratic, and Gerard could feel him getting close. He tried to pick up the pace, hollowing his cheeks as he bobbed his head, wanting nothing more than to see Frank fall apart in front of him. He wanted to know that he could do that — that he could make Frank feel this good.

 

“G-Gerard,” Frank groaned, his voice thick with need. Gerard’s heart pounded at the sound of his name, and he squeezed his eyes shut, focusing every ounce of his energy on Frank’s pleasure. His free hand gripped Frank’s thigh again, steadying himself as he sucked harder, taking him as deep as he could manage.

 

Frank's hips jerked, and Gerard felt the first twitch against his tongue, the low growl of pleasure vibrating through Frank’s chest. He barely had time to register it before Frank was coming, his fingers gripping tight in Gerard’s hair as his release spilled hot against Gerard's tongue. Gerard’s eyes widened in surprise, but he didn’t pull away. Instead, he swallowed, trying to keep up, the salty taste filling his mouth.

 

Frank let out a shuddering breath, his whole body relaxing into the seat, his hand still gently resting in Gerard’s hair, though the grip had softened. Gerard sat back slowly, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand as he looked up at Frank, feeling strangely proud despite the awkwardness of the moment.

 

Frank blinked down at him, a dazed smile pulling at his lips. “Fuck,” he whispered, his voice soft and breathless. He leaned forward, his hand cupping Gerard’s jaw as he kissed him — slow, tender, almost reverent. “You’re... amazing.”

 

Gerard couldn’t help the embarrassed chuckle that escaped him, the sound muffled against Frank’s lips. He was flushed, and his heart was still racing, but there was something incredibly fulfilling in the way Frank looked at him, like he was the only thing that mattered at that moment. Like they were both exactly where they were meant to be.

 

Frank brushed a few stray strands of hair from Gerard’s face, his eyes soft, hazel glowing in the dim light of the car. “We’re gonna be alright, G,” he murmured, his lips pressing gently against Gerard’s forehead, and for the first time in a long time, Gerard believed him.

Notes:

Ignore any mistakes, I wanted to put this chapter out as soon as possible since it's been a while! *Pending excuses.*

I recently got a new job and hit quite a bit of writer's block. But I'm back! Even with new ideas for not only this fic but for future ones.

Leave a comment? I would love to see your feedback.