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Shinji couldn’t explain why, but High School so far felt like it was passing much faster than Junior High ever did. The three years of Junior High had gone by at a snail’s pace, and it felt like so much had happened every month.
Well, maybe because to Shinji, so much had happened every month. In Junior High, he had gone out with new girls frequently, he had been so focused on basketball season and training, him and his friends had had a great time getting to know each other better and hanging out…
Now, somehow, he had blinked and it was already the second semester of High School. He would have thought it would have felt slower, because he definitely didn’t have as much of a social life as he did before. He couldn’t even remember the last time he spoke to a girl. Unless you counted a teacher or his sister.
Now his days all kind of merged and felt like one long, never-ending night. He had fully dived into the world of hacking and rebellion, and everything else had taken a backseat. It was like nothing else felt as important.
Well, almost nothing else.
“You’re coming next Sunday too, right, Shinji?” Yutaka asked him, snapping him out of his thoughts.
That’s right, the reason Shinji had started thinking about how quickly time was passing, was because it was Yutaka’s birthday coming up in ten days. They never really did big birthday parties in their group, but they did always make sure they spent it together. Hell, Shinji even showed up to Keita’s birthdays. Even when he insisted on doing an Under the Sea theme.
So when Yutaka asked Shinji whether he was coming or not, Shinji couldn’t help but frown.
“Of course,” he replied, looking at his friend with slight confusion. “Do you think I’d miss it?”
Yutaka looked a little embarrassed at the question. Like he didn’t really want to answer.
He didn’t have to, because Shuya answered for him.
“Well, you’ve kinda ditched everything else lately,” he said with a sheepish grin.
“Yeah, I guess I didn’t come to the movies, and I skipped the get-together for Iijima’s fish’s funeral down the toilet –“
“- Rip, Magikarp,” Keita said, bowing his head in respect. Yutaka copied his bow.
“- But I’d obviously not miss something really important.”
“You missed my Martial Arts tournament too,” Hiroki whispered. Shinji stared at him like he was insane.
“You can’t compare that to Yutaka’s birthday,” he said seriously.
“Why would you want more people to watch that 13 year old beat you up anyway?” Yoshitoki teased Hiroki. Shinji did kind of regret missing out on seeing that, although the others mocked Hiroki about it so often, it felt like he had pretty much been there too.
Keita and Shuya joined in on the teasing now as well, asking Hiroki whether or not he needed Takako to protect him when he passed the primary school.
Yutaka however, turned his attention to Shinji.
“I know you are busy,” he whispered, careful not to draw any attention to it. “That’s why I asked. I know you want to come.”
Shinji felt a pang of guilt, and then almost annoyance with himself. He shouldn’t feel guilty! He was doing really important stuff; stuff that, hopefully, would ultimately benefit Yutaka too. Stuff that would make sure he could live a life as safe and happy as possible.
But he hated the thought of Yutaka even considering that he might not be Shinji’s priority.
“I want to, and I will,” Shinji confirmed again. “Have you thought about what you’d like to do?”
Yutaka shook his head, smiling. Shinji thought he looked a little relieved; like he had actually been worried that he wouldn’t show up.
“I don’t care. I’ll be happy just hanging out.”
“We’re talking about Sunday?” Shuya suddenly jumped back into this conversation. “Because I’m thinking, we’ll sneak in some beers, have a mini party with the six of us.”
“Play some games,” Keita joined in with a grin. “They don’t have to be video games. We can play spin the bottle.”
He winked as Shinji as he said this, and Shinji felt himself shudder. Having Keita around should be advertised as some kind of free birth control.
Yutaka just laughed at the suggestion, though a little too loud.
“The beers sound good,” he said. “But I get to pick the games!”
“Is there anyone else you’d like to invite?” Yoshitoki asked. Shinji wondered what on earth he was talking about; it wasn’t like Yutaka had any friends outside of the group.
To his confusion, Yutaka seemed hesitant before he answered.
“No, I’m… It’s fine. I think just us.”
Shinji wanted to press more on this, but Shuya spoke instead.
“What about those girls you have Math with? You said they’re nice?”
“And one of them is pretty cute too,” Yoshitoki pointed out. “Tsukomo?”
Shinji felt like he was from an alien planet as he stared blankly at the other boys. What girls from math? Who the hell was Tsukomo? Why had he never heard that name before in his life?
“Oh, Hana,” Yutaka nodded, looking a little embarrassed. Shinji was staring even harder now. Hana? Yutaka was on first name basis with this girl?
“No, we don’t have to invite her. Or her friends,” he shrugged.
Shinji nodded in agreement. Yeah, they didn’t need to invite her. They had the boys!
Shuya and Yoshitoki shared a look that seemed to indicate they were a little disappointed. Of course it made sense now, why Shuya had suggested a so-called “mini party”. Whoever Hana was, she and/or her friends must be attractive. Not that Shinji cared.
“It could be a good chance for everyone to get to know each other better,” Shuya kept going, again with a sheepish smile on his face. “It’s just an idea.”
Shinji wanted to tell him to just get the hell over it.
Yutaka laughed, sounding a tiny bit nervous. “No, I mean, we don’t have to invite her because… We’re celebrating my birthday next Friday.”
The boys all went quiet for a moment. Shinji felt like his brain didn’t quite register what Yutaka was saying. We? He needed a confirmation that he was indeed going crazy.
“Sorry, I don’t think I got it right,” he said slowly, as if having trouble wording it. “When you say we’re celebrating your birthday next Friday, you mean…?”
Yutaka looked at him with a nervous smile. “Me and Hana.”
Yeah, that’s what Shinji had been afraid of.
Upon hearing the confirmation, the other boys all started talking over each other.
“For real? Is it a date?!”
“Did she suggest it or did you?”
“Do you like her? How long have you liked her?”
Shinji however, said nothing. Not even when Yutaka started almost defensively explaining that he and Hana were just friends, and that they were just going to watch a movie. He just kept staring at Yutaka like he didn’t even know him anymore.
And did he? Yutaka had gone and made himself a whole new best friend. A cute girl best friend, apparently. All because Shinji had been a little busy this year? Was that all he had meant to him?
Yeah, he might not know who Hana was, but he knew he didn’t like her.
Shinji had a hard time concentrating for the rest of the day. It didn’t help that it was Math class right now. Math was one of Shinji’s best subjects, and one of Yutaka’s worse. That was why they had been split up into different classes. It hadn’t been something Shinji offered a second thought before; he and Yutaka had plenty of classes together. And saw each other a lot after school. Usually at least weekly! Besides, Yutaka had both Keita and Shuya in his class. So why had he needed to branch out and meet new people?!
Maybe he should fail a couple of math tests on purpose in order to get dumped down to the dumb class. No, that would be crazy. But he did have to find a reason to get out of class early, so he could wait outside Yutaka’s classroom and finally spot these girls he had been hanging out with. Yeah, that was a better plan.
Shinji tapped his pencil thoughtfully against his paper, thinking about what excuse he could use. Stomach problems? Dead grandma? Teacher who had asked him to deliver something to them before school ended?
Just as he decided he would most likely go for dead grandma, Hiroki nudged him from the seat beside him.
“Are you okay?” he whispered.
“Huh?” Shinji asked. He must have been more lost in thought than he had realized in order for Hiroki to become worried.
“You look a little… out of it,” Hiroki whispered again, studying his friend. “I doubt it’s because you don’t understand some of these problems. So I thought… Is something wrong?”
It looked like he felt a little uncomfortable even asking; Hiroki wasn’t one who liked to pry in anyone else’s business. Even his own friends.
Shinji however was grateful for the questions; it gave him a chance to escape.
“No, I’m not great,” he replied, a little louder than Hiroki’s soft voice had been. “I don’t feel so good. I think I might head home.”
He was packing his bag as he spoke, ready to leave in three seconds.
Hiroki blinked. “Oh. Okay. I’ll talk to you later?”
“Yeah, see you,” Shinji said uninterestedly, not even looking back as he headed for the door.
The teacher looked like she was about to stop him, so Shinji just called out an “I’m sick!” as he left. Despite how cocky he could be, and how his attendance wasn’t always the best this year, the teachers generally liked him; he did what he was supposed to do and he mostly did it well. Maybe that was why she didn’t fight harder as he went out the door.
Or maybe it’s because I’m too hot to argue with.
Yutaka’s classroom was at the opposite side of the building. It occurred to Shinji that class wouldn’t be out for him for another 25 minutes. Was he just going to wait by the door, to catch a glimpse of Hana? He couldn’t do that, for obvious reasons. If Yutaka saw him, he would probably approach him and leave Hana in the dirt (at least Shinji hoped so, but now that Yutaka had a secret double life, he couldn’t be too sure). Or worse, Keita could see him, and insist on walking home together. He just couldn’t risk it.
Instead, Shinji sat down in the cafeteria, which Yutaka would have to pass through to get to the exit. There were enough people there for it not to be suspicious or even very noticeable that Shinji was hanging behind too. Part of him did still worry a little that Yutaka might smell him or just have some kind of Shinji-radar that went off when he was close, but he had to tell himself that that wasn’t very probable.
As he waited for them, Shinji found himself imagining what Hana looked like. He imagined some kind of Sakura-Takako hybrid, but with an even more amazing ass. Then he had to stop himself; after all, Yutaka had shit taste in girls. She was probably really basic looking. And flat as hell.
Then Shinji thought, it didn’t even matter what she looked like. It probably didn’t matter to Yutaka. Was he really not interested in her? Shinji had always insisted boys and girls couldn’t really be friends, but that was mostly just to annoy Hiroki, who was obviously close friends with Takako. But Yutaka was usually kind of awkward around girls, at least when it wasn’t a big group of them mixed together. So Hana must have been the one to make contact and really push the friendship…
Shinji heard a mix of voices grow louder, snapping him out of his thoughts. The last classes of the days were over, which meant the cafeteria was about to get more crowded with everyone ready to pass through to go home for the day. Shinji sat up straighter, trying to spot Yutaka’s face amongst the sea of different ones.
He could see Keita, Yoshitoki and Shuya walk together. The three of them kept throwing glances behind them, and Shinji tried to get an idea of what they were looking for.
That’s when he saw them. Yutaka and a girl Shinji had never seen before. At least he had never noticed her.
Yutaka was talking, seemingly quickly judging by his hand gestures that went along with it, and she was listening intently, laughing every other second.
It felt like a punch to the gut that Shinji had to admit she was pretty cute. Not beautiful, not sexy but… Cute. She looked like what he assumed Yutaka’s type would be, judging by his one previous crush.
Shinji knew he had to make a decision. He could stay back and try to imagine what on earth was so funny, that this girl couldn’t keep herself composed. Yeah, Yutaka was hilarious, but come on.
Or he could get up and join them. Introduce himself to Yutaka’s new… friend.
They were almost out of his line of sight when Shinji decided fuck it and jumped up from his seat. Walking at a quick pace, it didn’t take him long to catch up to the two.
“Taka!” he called out, making Yutaka stop in his tracks and turn. He looked a little surprised at first, but quickly broke into a smile.
“Shinji! Hey, did you wait for me?”
“Yep,” Shinji confirmed, looking straight at Hana. “I thought we could walk home together. Anyway, I wanted to meet the friend you’ve told me so much about too.”
No need to mention the fact that he hadn’t even heard her name until a few hours ago.
Still, Hana lit up at this. Shinji felt his smile grow more forced as she reached out a hand.
“Then you must be Shinji Mimura. Yutaka has told me so much about you too!” she beamed.
Shinji thought it was some kind of sick power-play to pretend she didn’t already know exactly who he was. He was the basketball star and dream hunk of the school; of course she knew. But he wouldn’t let this girl walk all over him!
He accepted her hand, still with a stiff smile on his face. “Nice to meet you,” he said with as much conviction as he managed. “Can’t wait to get to know you better.”
He couldn’t help but feel like this was the start of something that would be a gamechanger for their whole friendship group. And no, he was definitely not being dramatic.
The first thing Shinji learned about Hana, was that she could definitely not read a room at all.
After he and Yutaka agreed to walk home together, she had smiled brightly and announced:
“I’ll walk with you too! My house is on the way to Yutaka’s.”
Had she really not taken the hint that Shinji and Yutaka wanted some alone time? He hadn’t seen him in hours, and now he had to share him with her?
Shinji had almost expected Yutaka to tell her it wasn’t a good idea; that they were going to focus on each other on the walk. Instead, Yutaka smiled back at her.
“Cool,” he said simply. Shinji wanted to explain why it was very much not cool, but he felt like he couldn’t. If her house was on the way, then he found it difficult to explain why it didn’t make sense that she walked next to them.
He did make a vow not to speak to her.
As if she knew his plan, Hana made it impossible for him not to talk to her.
“So, Mimura… Yutaka has seriously talked so much about you. I know everyone says that, but I mean it. He always goes on about how nice you are, and how cool, and –“
Yutaka chuckled, looking a little embarrassed. “Hey, Shinji’s got enough confidence. We don’t really need to boost it right now.”
Shinji squinted at him. This felt like a perfect time to boost it, actually. Considering Yutaka had worked so hard to make him feel second best.
He turned to Hana, nodding. “Everything you’ve heard is true,” he declared. “And if you have watched any of our school’s basketball games, you’d know I’m great at that too.”
Hana laughed, clearly thinking he was making some kind of joke.
“He did say you were funny too! But I doubt you’re as funny as he is!”
Hana nudged Yutaka’s shoulder playfully as she said that, and Yutaka grinned to her. Seriously? For a moment it was as if Shinji might as well not be there.
He thought he felt his face heat up a little. The audacity of this girl!
“You’re right, Taka’s the funniest guy I know,” Shinji told her through gritted teeth. “Are you funny, Tsukomo?”
Hana looked like the question surprised her a little, before she hummed and shook her head.
“Not really,” she said sheepishly. Shinji wasn’t surprised; it was typical Yutaka to fall for girls with zero personality.
“Not really?!” Yutaka asked her, his mouth hanging open in an overly dramatic way. “Dude, the other day you made me laugh so much, my stomach actually hurt!”
“What, in class?” Shinji asked. The question probably came out more snappy than he intended; he just found it hard to believe Hana could be so hilarious Yutaka was basically pissing himself at school.
“No, at the cinema!” Hana elaborated as if this was the most natural thing in the world.
Shinji felt Yutaka eye him a little, probably testing to see his reaction. Surely Yutaka felt guilty about his betrayal, and that was why he was looking at him so closely.
Well, Shinji wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction of knowing this hurt him.
“The cinema, huh. Cool. What did you watch?” he asked, very proud of himself for managing to keep his voice calm.
“We went to see that new alien thing! Big Green Goo. It was sooo ridiculous, but wild. Do you like those kind of movies too, Mimura?” Hana asked. She spoke in an upbeat and quick tone, clearly warming up to him quickly.
No, Shinji hated it, actually. He had never understood Yutaka’s alien obsession. Still, Yutaka always convinced him (or forced him) to go see them with him. It was almost a tradition; Shinji would protest and complain about how lame those movies were, but Yutaka wouldn’t lose hope, and kept begging until they went together.
Not this time, apparently. This time Yutaka had a new friend who he didn’t have to beg or force. Because she genuinely liked them too.
And shouldn’t Shinji be happy about that? Why did It make him feel so… shit?
The fact that Hana had asked him a question had totally slipped his mind. The silence stretched on until Yutaka spoke.
“Uh, no, Shinji isn’t really a fan,” he explained, looking at Shinji nervously. “Which is why I didn’t ask him! That, and he got this new library job that keeps him busy, so…”
Shinji just stared at him. Unlike Hana, he could take a hint. He knew Yutaka was indirectly telling him that he would have brought him, but because he had turned down so much lately, he had gone with Hana instead. Fair enough, maybe, but still… It didn’t feel great.
“Hope you two had fun,” Shinji said flatly. “Well, sounds like you did, since you were laughing so much.”
Hana nodded. “Yeah, it was great. I’m so glad I started talking to Yutaka! He’s definitely made High School so much fun so far.”
She was really intent on rubbing it in, Shinji thought. And it wasn’t going to bug him.
“He made Junior High and Elementary school fun too,” he agreed. That’s right, I’ve known him for a long time.
They had walked for about ten minutes, and Hana stopped. She nodded towards a street to the right that led into a residential area.
“This is me,” she informed them. “But I’m so glad I finally got to talk to you, Mimura. Seriously! I hope we can all hang out again sometime.”
She gave them a little wave, shouting “I’ll text you later, Yutaka,” as she walked off.
Wow, she just had to have the last word, Shinji thought. Still, he gave an unenthusiastic wave to her back as she walked away.
Yutaka bit his lower lip softly as the two began walking again, looking like he was thinking of how to express his thoughts.
“So… What did you think? Did you like her?” he finally asked.
“Does it matter?” Shinji replied before thinking too much about how harsh it could sound. Yutaka blinked.
“Eh, kinda. I mean, she’s just a friend, but I’d like her to get along with my best friend.”
Shinji wondered if Yutaka’s best friend was still him, or if he was about to reveal it was now some thot from History class.
“She’s alright,” he sighed. “I don’t know her, obviously. She seems fine.”
Yutaka seemed to relax at this, apparently thinking fine was good enough for now.
“Would you want to? Get to know her better?” he continued. Shinji wondered where he was going with this.
“Sure?” Shinji shrugged. “Why not.”
Of course, he wasn’t really interested in Hana or getting to know her. But if Yutaka was going to suggest they all hung out together, it would decrease the opportunities Yutaka and Hana had to hang out alone.
“Okay, good,” Yutaka nodded. “I’ll tell Shuya then. That we can invite them to my birthday party?”
Shinji immediately regretted saying he would want to see her more. How was this fair? Hana would get next Friday with Yutaka, and crash their mini-party celebration? When would he and Yutaka get any time together?
Still, it was Yutaka’s birthday. If this was what he really wanted…
“Sounds fun,” Shinji mumbled. He doubted it would be.
Shinji had ended up joining Yutaka at his place for a second. He really didn’t have time for this; there was a whole file back home waiting for him to decrypt it. He had until 8 PM to fix it, but hell, he figured this was an emergency too. He clearly needed to spend some time with Yutaka to remind him how awesome he was.
Yutaka had immediately messaged Shuya to let him know his party would be on.
And Shuya had, even mire eagerly, replied within seconds with a bunch of party emojis. Shinji rolled his eyes.
“Can’t this guy settle down soon? He’s worse than me in my hay-day,” he commented, well aware he sounded like he was 80 years old.
Yutaka chuckled. “But when he had a crush on that band chick, you told him to hurry and get over it, so you could pick up girls together…” he reminded him.
It felt like a life time ago that Shinji had suggested something like that. It did ring a bell though.
“I just don’t think desperate is a good look on him,” Shinji defended himself. “Would Tsukomo even be interested in him?”
Realistically, he figured she should be. Shuya was probably the second hottest guy in their class, next to himself. Not that Shinji really rated boys based on hotness (other than ranking himself first).
Yutaka seemed to consider this for a moment.
“Maybe?” he said, not sounding too sure. He didn’t seem bothered by the thought though, which Shinji found a little comforting. “I don’t know if Shuya is really into her either, or if it’s just… new girls in general. I guess it’d be good if he and Nobu got the chance not to fall for the same one again.”
Shuya’s crush on Noriko was something he had drunkenly confessed to Shinji one day, but never acted on. When Yoshitoki had declared that he was no longer into the girl, Shinji checked up on Shuya and asked if he’d be interested in pursuing anything now. But Shuya had just insisted he was over it too, and that it was better not to complicate things.
Maybe Yutaka made a good point. Even though both Shuya and Yoshitoki had insisted they were over Noriko, it was probably better that they really proved it. Shinji was a firm believer in the best way to get over someone, is to get under someone new. So maybe adding some girls to a party would be a good thing.
Keita and Hiroki would obviously not be interested, as they were both dating someone now. And both of them were way too committed to even dream of cheating. Shinji could probably use a a hook-up (hell, it’d been like a year), but he couldn’t bring himself to be remotely interested.
As if reading his mind, Yutaka continued:
“Hana has like, three good friends who she’d probably bring. I don’t know if you’ve seen them around, but maybe one of them could be… Your type?”
Shinji didn’t think so. “I haven’t noticed them. Haven’t really been looking,” he answered honestly.
“Even if you don’t wanna hook up with any of them, it’d be fun to get to know new people, right?” Yutaka asked him.
Shinji wanted to say no. Why would he want to get to know more people? They were a good group. Six people were more than enough. Shinji quite literally didn’t have time for more friends.
But he couldn’t tell Yutaka that, not when the other boy was looking at him with so much hope for this merge of friend groups.
“Sure,” Shinji forced himself to say instead. “It’ll be good.”
Besides, he did have to get to know Hana better, if Yutaka was gonna like… marry her.
The next days, the boys were already buzzing with excitement about Yutaka’s upcoming party the following weekend. It was almost a little sad; Shinji knew he didn’t have a social life, but he thought maybe his friends were more involved. Clearly this was one of the few parties they had been invited to though.
All of them were gathered in the cafeteria for lunch. Except Yutaka, who was eating lunch outside with Hana and some of her friends. Shinji couldn’t believe the pace of which this was happening. Yesterday she didn’t even exist, and now Yutaka was ditching the boys for lunch with her. He wondered how long Yutaka had been sneaking around with this girl, and if he felt like he could be more open about it now, because he had been busted.
“Do you think Yutaka will be okay if I bring Kayoko?” Hiroki asked thoughtfully. The two of them had just dated for around a month, but Shinji worried they were were eloping any day now. “And maybe Takako, too? I want her and Kayoko to get to know each other better and –“
“- Yes! Bring Chigusa,” Shinji answered quickly. Although he was pretty sure Takako wouldn’t go for it if he shot his shot with her, he thought he might as well give it his best go. Yutaka would probably spend the night with his tongue down Hana’s throat, or worse places. Shinji needed a good distraction.
Hiroki looked at him as if he regretted this suggestion, but he didn’t get a chance to say anything before Keita joined in.
“Cool, and I’ll bring Yuka! And maybe she can bring her friends too!”
Both Shuya and Yoshitoki looked a little uncomfortable now. Shinji figured the last thing both of them wanted was to see Noriko there. Not so over it as they claim, he thought, which just proved his theory. Besides, would Yutaka be fine with Izumi being there? Ugh, if Keita would drag all the girls the guys had been in love with in there, it would totally ruin the mood.
“We have to make sure Taka’s house isn’t trashed,” he reminded Keita sternly. “Anyone we invite has to go through him first. He could have objections.”
“Come on, he loves Yuka!” Keita insisted, laughing. It was true. Yutaka and Yuka got along great, always cracking jokes together. Shinji knew he wouldn’t protest at Keita’s suggestion.
“I’m just saying, we are counting like, 15 people soon,” Shinji explained. “Add Shuya’s beers and vodka to that, and we have a potential disaster on our hands.”
Yoshitoki shook his head. “We’ll keep it under control. Pinky promise,” he insisted. “But you’re right, we should ask Yutaka first.”
“I’ll find him right now,” Shinji declared, getting up from his chair. The others looked at him somewhat confused.
“He’s having lunch with those girls, so… There’s no rush, is there?” Shuya said, running a hand through his hair.
“Yeah, don’t be a cockblock, man!” Keita laughed.
Actually, that was just what Shinji wanted to be. He rolled his eyes at them, and without further explanation, went to find Yutaka.
It wasn’t difficult to find Yutaka outside. He was sitting with Hana and two other girls by the benches near the main entrance of the school, having his lunch. It was such a weird sight to Shinji; Yutaka surrounded by girls. Although Yutaka could get along with anybody, it was still hard to see him so comfortable with the opposite sex. Shinji couldn’t remember him interacting much with girls in Junior High.
The ease of which they were all hanging out now too, made Shinji think this wasn’t the first time they had hung out outside of class as a group. How could he have missed this?!
The group hadn’t spotted him yet, and Shinji slowly made his way closer. He felt like a stalker or something straight out of a horror movie, but part of him was hoping he wouldn’t be seen. He was so curious about what Yutaka could be talking with girls about.
Careful not to make a noise, he stayed close to the wall of the building, inching closer.
“… - and so cute,” he could hear Hana tell Yutaka. Her hand rested on his arm for a moment, and Shinji could tell Yutaka was blushing. He was clearly too immersed in the conversation with his friend to notice Shinji nearby though.
“Hana, come oooon, you’re embarrassing him,” one of Hana’s random friends laughed. Yes, random girl, you tell her, Shinji thought. Something about the way Hana touched Yutaka made him want to go feral. But other than seeming slightly embarrassed, Yutaka didn’t seem to mind.
“I’ll leave him alone… for now!” Hana laughed too, pulling her hand away from Yutaka. “I cant wait for your birthday now though. Are you sure it’s okay we’re all coming to your birthday party?”
“Hana, don’t give him a chance to say no!” the other girl spoke up. Shinji thought she had an interesting look (unlike Hana); she had a nose piercing, which he was sure she must have been asked by the teachers to remove a hundred times, a long bob, and thin, nicely shaped eyebrows. She looked a little edgy. “I want a chance to get to know Nanahara.”
Yutaka was the one to laugh now. “Don’t worry, he sounded ready to mingle last time we spoke. Uhm, in a not desperate way, of course.”
Smooth, Shinji thought. He was really grateful he had never needed Yutaka to wingman him.
Hana gave Yutaka a warm smile, and Shinji felt his stomach drop again.
“Whatever, Hiromi. Whast’s important is to make sure Yutaka has a good time! It’s his birthday! Ah, it reminds me, I need to find a gift…”
Shinji started backing off towards the building. He had wanted to catch a glimpse of Yutaka and Hana’s friendship, but he felt like he was seeing too much. The touching, the meaningful smiles, how comfortably they spoke to each other…
He tried to remind himself that this was a good thing for Yutaka. That he had clearly been lonely and needed new friends. That this was probably somehow Shinji’s fault for not being there enough. And Shinji needed to prepare himself for the fact that Keita would probably end up being his main friend, as everyone else distanced themselves from him...
But Shinji didn’t feel ready to lose Yutaka to this girl. He had to do something.
Yutaka’s birthday party was becoming less of a casual friend hangout, and more of an event that it seemed like the whole school was coming to. Shinji thought that was probably for the best at this point; he would prefer a large crowd rather than the boys and Hana and her friends being forced to socialize with each other all night. The party had also been moved to Saturday instead of Sunday; it seemed like it would go on into the night. Especially if party planner Shuya got his way.
Shinji was getting more and more set on flirting with Hana’s friend, who he found out was named Hiromi Kiryuin. That wasn’t petty, right? Yutaka couldn’t be offended by that, if he was planning on hanging out with Hana all night, right?! It didn’t occur to Shinji that overthinking these things a week in advance might not be normal.
It didn’t help that Hana kept testing him. That Monday, she had actually approached him when he was headed to basketball practice, to ask him for advice on something.
“I want to get Yutaka a gift he would really appreciate,” she explained, smiling shyly. “Obviously, you know him better than I do. Is there anything he really wants?”
Shinji had to take a deep breath. It took everything he had not to answer sarcastically.
“I’m sure he’ll appreciate anything you give him. He can be pretty sentimental like that. It’s the thought that counts and bla bla bla,” he waved his hand. “But you can’t go wrong with anything alien or space themed, I guess. He’s also on a deep sea exploration kick after seeing that Loch Ness documentary…”
“- Oh yeah, he talked about that one!” Hana clapped her hands together eagerly. “I’m not sure I can get him a submarine, but at least I got some ideas now. Thanks, Mimura-kun!”
She had ran off quickly after, and Shinji could finally roll his eyes. Why even bother being his (fake!) friend if she couldn’t think of a gift?! Yutaka was the easiest person to buy gifts for, because he was excited about so many different things! Shinji had his gift for him ready for a while now. And it would definitely beat out whatever last minute thing Hana would pull out.
The rest of the week passed by surprisingly quickly. All the boys were busy planning what to prepare for the big party (Shuya had taken the lead of the planning, but it was still a joint effort). Keita had surprised them all with an actually sweet idea, which was to hire an ice cream van for Yutaka, but the prices and availability had made it impossible. Still, it inspired the idea of a very elaborate snack bar that Keita would be in charge of. It was probably the one thing Shinji would trust him not to fuck up.
The others were mostly thinking about what they would drink; and what girls would be there. After the Neutrals had RSVPed with “yes”, the mood had been a little more tense. Although Shuya did try to lighten it by saying he would have to provide even more vodka now.
Shinji quietly thought this whole thing would probably turn into a disaster; but he didn’t want to say it out loud. Besides, his main problem with this whole event wasn’t the snacks or drinks or the Neutral girls; it was Hana and her annoyingly big smile and loud laugh everytime Yutaka spoke. They all still hadn’t hung out properly together yet, but Shinji felt like he spotted her and Yutaka everywhere throughout this week. Which seemed so… wrong. Why wasn’t Yutaka always close to him, like he used to be?
The Friday, Yutaka again reminded them that he and Hana were going to the movies to hang out as an early birthday celebration (why did he keep rubbing it in?!). Some of the other guys took the opportunity to nudge him and teasingly tell him to use protection, whilst Shinji just looked at him blankly.
“Have fun,” he had told him, thinking he did a good job in disguising that he hoped Yutaka had a horrible time. Hiroki sent him a funny look though, so he might not have been as smooth as he thought.
Shinji had a hard time concentrating on coding that night. He kept expecting an encrypted text from one of his acquaintances telling him to hurry the fuck up, but the only text he got ended up being from Yutaka at 9 am asking him if he was excited for tomorrow.
“Aren’t you at the movies? Turn your phone off,” Shinji texted back.
“That ended an hour ago. Home now. What are you up to?”
Shinji didn’t really have time for it, but ended up texting Yutaka for most of the night anyway. Clearly he had to fight to keep this friendship. Who knew what Yutaka would replace him with next week if he didn’t? And, of course, he always wanted to talk to him.
The afternoon of the party, Shinji had volunteered to come early to help set up. Shuya was there too, as was Keita (of course, setting up the snack bar with a new kind of determination Shinji had never seen from him before).
Yutaka’s new best friend was no place to be seen though. Shinji couldn’t help but scoff at this. How much did she really love him if she didn’t even bother to help set up for his birthday event?!
Not that he wished she was there. It was actually kind of nice, helping Yutaka tidy and prepare a drinks table and set up a playlist.
"I don't even care that Noriko is coming!" Shuya declared from over at the snacks table, where he and Keita were arranging chips bowls. Shinji thought he probably cared a little, because he had opened a second beer, and none of the guests had arrived yet. "It'll be good to see her. And who knows, maybe Nobu will actually go for it?”
"And get totally humiliated!" Keita laughed. Shinji theorized Keita was happy as long as someone else was the one being the embarrassment of the group.
"I thought Nobu was over her..." Yutaka frowned, hooking his phone up to the speakers.
"Well, yeah, he says he is. I dunno. I think it could be good for him to like, get a chance?" Shuya said thoughtfully, taking a big sip of his beer.
It was apparent he still had some guilt about Noriko liking him more than she did Yoshitoki. Which Shinji thought was ridiculous. It wasn’t Shuya's fault. It wasnt like how Yutaka had suddenly invested all his time and energy in Hana, making her fall head over heels for him. Shuya hadn’t hung out with Noriko in that way.
"I think Hiromi will like getting to talk to you, at least," Yutaka told Shuya, trying to get him more upbeat again.
Shinji frowned; Hiromi had been his backup. Why did Yutaka sabotage everything? Okay, Yutaka didn’t know, and Hiromi had expressed interest in Shuya, but still!
" Wow, she's hot! " Keita exclaimed. "Date her, so we can double date! We tried with Hiroki and Kotohiki, and man, let me tell you, what a disaster. You won’t believe how he -"
"- Whatever!" Shinji interrupted him, raising a hand as an extra signal that he should stop talking. "Look, I don’t wanna ruin anything here, but I was gonna go for it with Kiryuin. If that's cool, Shuya. I'm not gonna cause any drama."
He thought he had sounded pretty casual as he said this, but Yutaka looked at him with the kind of stunned look as if he had just slapped someone.
Shuya just laughed though." Go for it. It's nice seeing you get back in the game. I was worried the ol' Shinji had faded away in High School," he told him with a genuine look of relief, as he put an arm around him.
Shinji made himself smile back, although he didn't like how everyone kept thinking and acting like he wasn't ever around. He would have to prove them wrong tonight.
As expected, the party quickly turned into utter chaos. No one was fighting or crying yet, but it was 9 pm, and Shinji didn’t think there was a single sober person at this party. Maybe Takako, who was sitting next to Hiroki and Kayoko at the sofa. The couple were making out passionately, which was very unlike how Shinji had ever seen Hiroki act, and Takako watched them with a slightly raised eyebrow. She was clearly both fascinated and disgusted.
Despite all the talk both Shuya and Yoshitoki had been doing about the new, cute girls Yutaka would invite to the party, they were both eyeing Noriko from across the room. Shinji wasn’t close enough to hear what they were saying, but Shuya had his arm around Yoshitoki and pulled him close, yelling something enthusiastically into his ear. Everytime they glanced over at Noriko, Shinji thought she seemed to notice it somehow. She looked a little embarrassed, tucking her head behind her ear, and trying to focus on the conversation she was having with her own friends.
Whatever mess they were about to get into, Shinji wanted no part of it. He would always be there to back up his friends, but not when it came to their own silly love triangles.
Speaking of messes, Shinji made sure to watch his steps, as Keita had already gotten into a serious popcorn battle with Yuka, with pieces of it now spread all over the floor. Needless to say, the snack bar had been compromised.
“Let’s not waste food! It still taste great!” Keita insisted, as he scooped whatever pieces he could get his hands on up from the floor, eating them eagerly. Shinji couldn’t look at him.
What he was looking at, was Yutaka near the corner of the room. They had pulled out some extra chairs, and Yutaka and Hana were sitting next to each other, talking as quietly as possible with the loud music surrounding them.
It looked like they were having quite a serious conversation, although Shinji wondered how that was possible; he could tell by the glassiness of his eyes and how red his face was, that Yutaka was pretty drunk. And drunk Yutaka was usually the laughing and talking gibberish-kind of person.
Shinji didn’t know Hana yet, but he thought her gestures seemed a little over the top now, and she spilled some of her drink as she swayed it around talking, so he guessed she was pretty drunk too.
Shinji did not yet feel drunk enough to witness them flirting passionately (though luckily still sittingone feet apart). He headed for Shuya’s drinking station, mixing himself what he thought was a very good idea of rum and vodka and orange juice.
“That’s… heavy stuff,” someone commented next to him.
Shinji looked down at the girl, and it took him a second to realize it was Hiromi Kiryuin.
“Oh. Hey,” he greeted lazily. “Yeah, I’m known to be quite the drink inventor. Want one?”
“That’s okay,” she laughed. “I’ll stick with this.” She showed him an apple cider that he assumed she had brought herself, it definitely hadn’t been on Shuya’s shopping list.
“Are you enjoying the party?” Shinji found himself asking as he mixed the ingredients. He didn’t really care if she enjoyed it or not, but right now, with Yutaka talking to his new best friend, he figured he could chat with her just to pass time.
Hiromi shrugged, taking a sip of her cider.
“It’s fun. Hana’s been really excited to go and – Seto-kun is nice. It was nice of him to invite us.”
Shinji thought something about what she said sounded weird. It took a moment for it to click, but then he realized:
“You still call him Seto… I think Tsukomo calls him Yutaka,” he commented. Of course he knew she did, but might as well keep it vague. “You’re not as close?”
“Not really,” Hiromi admitted. “He’s more Hana’s friend, I guess. We haven’t really hung out after school before today.”
Shinji finally finished mixing his drink, and took a large sip. It tasted pretty awful, but somehow also perfect for right now.
“They’ve gotten close pretty quick,” he remarked, not really having a point beside just that. Hiromi seemed to wait for him to say more, but when he didn’t, she nodded.
“I guess so. Maybe they have a lot in common? Like, they’re both pretty funny. And into movies,” she shrugged. “It’s cute.”
“Cute?” Shinji snapped, catching himself. He cleared his throat. “But they’re just friends, right?”
Hiromi grinned at him. “Come on. Are you trying to get me to spill the tea? That will cost you.”
Shinji thought about it for a second. Even in his fuzzy tipsy mind, he remembered something clearly about Hiromi.
“I’ll introduce you to Shuya,” he told her, nodding towards Shuya, who was still talking to Yoshitoki.
Hiromi looked at him curiously. If she was embarrassed by Shinji name-dropping a boy like that, she didn’t show it.
“Huh. Am I that obvious?” she finally asked, chuckling. “Alright. I’ll tell you. Hana adores Seto-kun, but it’s not romantic. Not that she’d told us, at least. So if you wanna wingman him, I think you need to work pretty hard.”
Shinji couldn’t believe Hana’s horrible taste. Yutaka wasn’t her type? Then what the hell was? A loser like Keita? Or some tragic bad boy, like Ryuhei or Hiroshi who were currently playing beer pong with Mrs Seto’s vases? (Who invited them?!).
The information did weirdly make him feel like slowing down on his drink though. And a deal was a deal, so…
“Come on. Let’s talk to Shuya,” he said, nodding in the boy’s direction. Hiromi actually looked a little uncomfortable, but she ran a hand through her bob and drew a deep breath.
“Okay. Cool, “ she nodded back to him.
Shinji guided her across the room, just in time to catch the last of Shuya’s loud rambling.
“So, like, if you wanna go for it, I say go for it. Seriously, Nobu! You like, loved her, for soo long. And yeah, I still like her lots, but you’re my best friend. I love you, man. I love you. You’re my brother, Nobu! I just want you to be happy!”
Yoshitoki smiled awkwardly, clearly aware of how loud Shuya was being (which Shuya was rarely aware of himself, even when sober). Yoshitoki also didn’t seem drunk enough for this.
“Yeah, man. You’ve said that. Six times already,” he laughed, giving Shinji a look as if begging him to save him.
“Sorry to interrupt,” Shinji said casually. He gestured to Hiromi, who was standing next to him. “Shuya, I want you to meet this really cool girl from Yutaka’s math class. One of Tsukomo’s friends- Her name’s Hiromi Kiryuin.”
Shuya finally snapped out of whatever trance he had been in that had made him think he and Yoshitoki were the only people in the room. He gave Hiromi a bright smile; the kind that almost made Shinji understand how Shuya was the second most popular guy in school, other than himself.
“Hey,” he said hazily. “Wow, love your piercing.”
Hiromi giggled; a sound that didn’t really suit her. “Thanks. Uhm, your hair is really cool.”
“My work here is done,” Shinji mumbled to himself.
“Ah! Mimura-kun!” he suddenly heard his name called over the music. Instinctively he knew where to turn; it wasn’t like he recognized her voice yet, but he just knew it had been Hana calling for him. She was waving for him from her chair, with Yutaka looking red and drunk next to hear.
“I’m gonna head over and see what’s up,” Shinji told Yoshitoki. Shuya and Hiromi had already engaged in conversation, and seemed to be getting along.
Yoshitoki frowned. “You’re gonna wingman Shuya and then just leave me alone?” he asked.
“Go talk to Nakagawa or something,” Shinji encouraged him with a shrug. It didn’t seem like the right thing to say, because Yoshitoki turned bright red. Shinji didn’t have time to care about it though; Yutaka might need him!
When he arrived, it seemed more like Hana had been the one who needed him.
“Where have you been all night?! Taka and I totally missed you!” she grinned.
Taka? Who the hell does this girl think she is?
“That’s sweet. Neither one of you even looked at me, so I didn’t feel too missed,” Shinji said, not even trying to hide the bitterness. Hana seemed to think he was joking, so she just laughed. Yutaka however, shifted uncomfortably.
“I’ll… Get another drink! Yeah, another drink!” he said, jumping off of his chair. He swayed a little, and Shinji found himself automatically reaching out to steady him.
“You okay, Taka?” he asked gently.
Yutaka nodded. “Yep! Yep, yep. I’m good. I’m feeling fiiine. Just want a new drink! Uhm, Hana, anything for you?”
Hana showed him her glass, which was still half fully. “No thanks!”
As Yutaka left, Shinji considered following him, but Hana gently took a hold of his arm and tried to guide him towards the now available chair.
“Sit! Let’s chat! It’s been ages!”
Shinji wondered how it could have been ages, when he had only known her name for barely a week. Still, he sat down, already waiting for Yutaka to return.
He had to take another big gulp of his drink now that he was alone with Hana. His glass was half-empty now; pretty rude of Yutaka not to offer to get him something, too. Why was Shinji expected to get up and walk, if Hana wasn’t?
“Are you having fun?” Hana shouted to him, almost drowned out by the music.
Shinji wanted to say no, but he remembered it was Yutaka’s birthday, and he had to play nice.
“Yeah. Lots of people showed up. It’s fun,” Shinji agreed unenthusiastically.
“I know, right?! I didn’t realize Yutaka knew all these people,” Hana said, looking around the room. Her expression changed to slight concern as Hiroshi was doing something that looked suspiciously like humping the lamp by the sofa; luckily Mitsuru quickly got him off it.
“I think some people just showed up because they heard about a party and wanted a place to drink,” Shinji said coldly. He wondered if he should slow down on his drinking, in case he needed to start kicking people out. But then he had to be sober-ish around Hana… Which sounded like torture. Man, what a tough choice.
Hana shook her head.
“As long as things don’t get like, too crazy! Anyway, I’m just glad you came.”
Shinji frowned at her. “What do you mean?”
He doubted his presence would make that much of a difference to Hana. After all, they weren’t friends. Nor did they really like each other. At least he didn’t like her. He had strongly considered attempting to make a voodoo doll out of his mom’s yarn to resemble her, but he wasn’t sure how to affect the voodoo doll to lose a friend. And killing her through witch craft seemed a little intense.
“Weell, just that, Yutaka always says you’re busy a lot. But I know you’re the most important person for him to have around today,” Hana explained.
Shinji wished he could believe that. Wow, this whole Hana-thing had really shaken his confidence more than he let himself believe. Normally, he would reply with an Obviously and genuinely mean that. Now…
“I don’t know about that,” Shinji shrugged. “He’s been spending most of the night with you, Tsukomo.”
Hana blinked, looking confused at this, like she hadn’t quite realized.
“Oh,” she said, tapping her nails against her glass thoughtfully. “I guess we got carried away talking. You should have come over before!”
Shinji figured he had said this much already, he might as well continue. “Nah, I didn’t want to interrupt. It seemed like things were getting a little intimate with you two.”
Intimate might not have been the right word, but they had seemed to be in their own little world. Why would Shinji want any part of that?
“Intimate?” Hana repeated. Shinji knew she had heard him, and he knew she knew what the word meant. So what exactly was the question? He stared at her blankly, with no intention of elaborating. Eventually it seemed to sink in to Hana what he meant, and her eyes widened.
“What? No, no! Did you think… Mimura-kun, did you think Yutaka and I were like, a thing? That we were flirting and stuff?!”
She seemed genuinely horrified, which almost offended Shinji. Yeah, I did think that, and you would have been damn lucky if it was the case.
“Obviously,” he said, finishing his drink. “You guys aren’t exactly hiding it.”
Hana shook her head now, repeatedly. When she stopped, she gave Shinji the same wide-eyed look as before. Leaning closer, she whispered:
“Mimura-kun… I thought you two were a thing.”
She was apparently not drunk enough, nor stupid enough, to announce this to the whole room, which Shinji had to give her some creds for. Well, if he wasn’t too busy choking on air.
“What?!” he whispered back, clearing his throat. “Me and Taka?”
“Uhm, well, yeah!” Hana confirmed. “It’s just… He always talks about how amazing you are, and how much he misses you now that you’re busy, and… I just thought it was a secret because, you know, but that it was like… A known secret kinda thing! And that maybe you were having a bit of a rough patch because of the time management-thing … -“
“- And you wanted to help us. By making sure I spent more time with him… Hanging out all of us together too…” Shinji continued for her, mostly thinking out loud.
Hana smiled, looking a little embarrassed.
“Yutaka has become my friend, for real! When we’re hanging out alone, it was obvious he wished you were there too. I guess it wasn’t my business to try to jump in and fix things…”
Shinji wasn’t sure what to say. He couldn’t really process how Hana had misunderstood something so badly. It wasn’t as if he and Yutaka sent out all these signals that they were madly in love or something. Because they weren’t.
“You didn’t have to try to fix things, because there’s nothing to fix,” Shinji told her quietly, not sure if she even heard him properly over the music. “There’s nothing like that between us. We’re just friends too.”
Judging by the thoughtful expression on Hana’s face as she studied him, it didn’t quite seem like she believed him. But she finally nodded.
“I guess we both misunderstood!” she concluded, forcing another smile. “Sorry.”
“Hey, guys! Sorry, the line was crazy. And I got in the line for the bathroom first, by accident, so I spent like 10 minutes just standing there. Anyway… What were you talking about?!” Yutaka popped up seemingly out of no where, beaming at them. Both Shinji and Hana looked up at him with empty stares.
Despite how drunk he was, Yutaka quickly realized something was up. His smile fell and he stared back at Shinji and Hana, his brows frowning in confusion.
“Eeeh….. What’s up?” he asked. He seemed a bit unsteady, despite standing still, and Shinji got up from his chair.
“Nothing. Sit down, Taka,” he instructed him gently, steering him towards the chair. Yutaka flopped down on it, but still looked up at him with big, confused eyes.
“Were you talking about me?!” he exclaimed. Sober Yutaka would probably not have been so direct in front of Hana… Or maybe he would. Shinji realized he really had no idea what their friendship was like.
“Don’t be so self-observed,” Shinji replied, hoping to casually blow it off. “If we were talking about you, it’d be about how rude it was that you only got Tsukumo a drink, and not me.”
“You have a drink!” Yutaka protested, pointing to Shinji’s odd cocktail… Which of course, now was empty. “Oh…”
“It’s alright! Mimura-kun can have my drink,” Hana insisted, jumping up from her chair. “I will just make myself a new one. I really have to pee anyway!”
Shinji wasn’t sure she did, but he wouldn’t argue against it. It’d be nice with some alone time with Yutaka again.
“You sooo had a drink before!” Yutaka insisted, sounding like he was trying to convince himself more than anyone. “I… I checked!”
“Did not,” Shinji lied, taking Hana’s chair. “You were just not paying attention to me.”
“Nuh uh! There’s no way. I always pay attention to you!” Yutaka insisted harder, leaning closer, as if Shinji hearing him better would mean Shinji would believe his words more easily.
“I’d hope so. Or else I’d know there was time to start working out again,” Shinji said, although he could hear himself not sounding as confident as usual. He justified that his alcohol was slowing him down right now.
“I’d pay attention to you no matter what you looked like,” Yutaka continued, slurring his words a little.
Shinji frowned. “Sounds like something you’d say to someone ugly.”
At this, Yutaka laughed loudly. Louder than he would at a line like that normally. “Come on, Shinjiii.”
“What? “I’d like you no matter what you look like” is like, what Iijima’s mom probably tells him,” Shinji rolled his eyes.
Yutaka looked confused again. “Are you comparing us to Keita and his mom? Is that like… Is that who we are?!” he asked, sounding a little concerned.
Shinji thought back to Hana’s wild assumption about them. What were they, exactly? Well, not Keita and his mom, that was for sure. But what then? Normally Shinji would have assumed they were best friends, but he didn’t know if he really deserved that term anymore. Was he Yutaka’s friend? Of course. Was he the best? Duuh, always. But had he somehow missed all these important clues that Hana claimed she had picked up on?!
“Shinji! Dude, are you drunk-drunk? Oh! Have this!” he seemed to just remember he had a drink which was now meant for Shinji, and pushed it in his face.
It looked very red and smelled like sugar; Shinji wasn’t sure he would really like it. But anything sounded good right now.
“Thanks,” he said hoarsely, accepting it. Almost wary, he took a sip of it. It seemed like it was meant to be a simple mix of cranberry vodka, but it tasted much sweeter than Shinji thought it was supposed to. “Is this your own kinda magic mix?”
“Yeah, I added some sugar. I thought maybe girls would like it sweeter?” Yutaka hummed. “I don’t make lots of drinks for girls! I mean, not that I want to. I… Mmm, forget it. Do you like it?”
“Yeah, well done,” Shinji complimented his attempt, although he wasn’t sure if he would say he liked it. But any alcohol would do right now. He took a couple of sips before pausing.
“Hey, Taka,” he said, hoping he could find the right words to express what he wanted to right now. It would probably help more if he knew exactly what he did want to express.
“Hey,” Yutaka said back, smiling drunkenly to him. “I’m glad you’re here.”
“Always glad to be here,” Shinji replied quickly. “And I’m sorry if I’ve been… Harsh on Tsukomo. I’m glad you’re making more friends and stuff.”
Yutaka didn’t seem to really understand what he was saying. “Huh? Harsh? You’ve been nice to her though? I’ve only seen you talk a couple of times but you’ve never been mean or anything!”
Shinji wanted to argue against it, but he realized all his animosity against her had been having its main outlet inside his own brain. And that hadn’t hurt anyone, right?
“I guess I didn’t always think the nicest thoughts about her,” he confessed.
Yutaka sat back on his chair a little, his lips moving wordlessly for a couple of seconds before speaking.
“Like… Like dirty thoughts?” he asked quietly. Shinji thought maybe he heard him wrong at first, but judging by Yutaka’s expression, he hadn’t.
“What? No. God, no. Like thoughts that I wished you guys had never become friends. Because I… I guess I felt bad. About myself because it felt like you were looking for someone to replace me with. And then I felt bad for you, because maybe I had it coming. Being replaced. Everyone seems shock whenever I show up to things these days. I thought maybe I let you get lonely.”
Yutaka looked down at his drink, tapping the sides of it rhythmically as if in a trance. He shook his head slowly.
“I guess I was lonely sometimes but… Shinji, you know no one can replace you, right? It was nice getting to know some new people this year, and I have lots of fun with Hana, but… I don’t miss you any less around her,” he explained.
Shinji thought back to Hana saying Yutaka always talked about missing him. Apparently it was true.
“I miss you too. I’m gonna try to find a better work-life balance. Or at least a work-you balance,” he promised, hoping it was a promise he could fulfill.
Yutaka smiled to his drink. “That’d be good. I’d like that.”
“And I’ll give Tsukomo a real chance too.” Somehow, Shinji didn’t feel as resentful towards her now that he knew Yutaka wasn’t into her, and vice versa. Weird coincidence.
“I’d say that means a lot to me, but I didn’t realize you weren’t already giving her a chance,” Yutaka chuckled, finally looking up. “But thanks. And I can keep bringing her to stuff I know you hate, like weird alien movies, so you get an excuse not to come!”
“I’ll come,” Shinji insisted. The movies might not be his favourite thing, but spending time with Yutaka was. “But maybe Tsukomo can come too.”
He didn’t hate the idea of getting to know her now. Maybe she was full of other surprises. Or observations. Even though she had been wrong about this one thing, Shinji thought she seemed pretty smart. But he couldn’t really explain why.
He also didn’t think about the fact that despite Hana having excused herself to quickly go to the bathroom, she never came back over. Keita had passed out in the guest room too, leaving Shinji and Yutaka uninterrupted for the rest of the night. And selfishly, Shinji thought that was the best way to spend Yutaka’s birthday.