Work Text:
The water that filled the bathtub had run cold long ago. Rhaenyra gripped the edges of the copper bathtub making her knuckles turn white. She looked at the white soapy water around her, the pain between her legs had barely passed but returned again when she got on Syrax and went to stop Daemon from cutting Otto Hightower’s head off at the bridge.
She and Daemon had just returned from Storm's End after trying to find pieces of Luke or Arrax that might have washed up the shore—nothing but a mangled dragon wing.
Her son—her sweet boy, was truly gone.
She looked down at her stomach peeking from up the water. It was still a bit round and soft from the babe that rested there just a few days ago. The sweet girl she never got to meet, who never got to take her first breaths, never opened her eyes. She looked around and spotted the empty crib and rocking chair in the corner of her bedchamber. She and Daemon had everything ready for her. Is this what her own lady mother felt every time she lost a child? Rhaenyra doesn’t know how Aemma found the strength to go through that more than once.
In the span of almost 20 years, she had gone from a motherless child to a childless mother herself.
She thought of her other boys, how would she explain to the little ones that their brother was never returning home? She wanted Jace to stay in Winterfell to save him from the pain of knowing his brother, his childhood companion, was no longer here. She thought of Baela and Rhaena, Daemon’s girls whom she fiercely loved as if they were her own, how did they react? She wasn’t there to see it.
Her hands slipped from the edges of the bathtub and landed in the water making it splash around her. She let her body slip down until her knees were fully out of the water and her head floated above it. Water slipped into her ears, she listened to the muffled sounds of her heartbeat.
She closed her eyes, opened her mouth, and let her head fully submerge under. Water rushed inside her nose and mouth almost reaching her lungs, this was it, she was going to see her babies again. She knew her children would be taken care of, and that Jace would be a good king after her, she knew Daemon would make sure of that.
As she was sure she was reaching some kind of afterlife, she felt familiar calloused hands grab onto her shoulders and lift her out of the water. She was rapidly lifted from the bathtub choking on the remaining water that had entered her body. Someone wrapped a towel around her as Daemon rubbed her arms trying to get warmth into her. She spat water and cried burying her head in his chest.
“Do you need help getting her dressed?” she heard Baela’s voice, surprisingly soft and a bit hoarse, possibly from crying.
“I’ll take care of her, go and look after your sister,” Daemon said.
Rhaenyra’s eyes were still closed and she heard a door softly close. Daemon kissed her wet hair and wrapped the towel tighter around her.
“I don’t want to be here anymore” she cried “My babies are gone, they took them from me. I want to see my children again”
Daemon didn’t have the heart to tell her those were his children too. He was also hurting. His Visenya, named after the warrior conqueror whose sword he wielded and planned to gift to her once she turned of age, a girl that was half him half Rhaenyra, a girl he would never get to know. He loved Lucerys as if he were his own son, he helped raise that boy into the kind and sweet soul that he was. It didn’t matter to him that he didn’t sire him, he was part of Rhaenyra and that was enough for him, he loved everything that was part of her. Everything she gave him.
He carried Rhaenyra and sat her at the edge of their bed still holding her close to his chest. “You’re not allowed to die,” he whispered, “I need you, our children need you, you can’t leave me alone to take care of them, I’m afraid my heart wouldn’t be able to take it.”
Rhaenyra opened her eyes and looked up at him, his cheeks stained with tears, she didn’t think she’d ever seen him cry.
(He hadn’t cried since he was a small boy after his mother died.)
He kissed her forehead once more and finished drying her body. It was a quiet affair, the last time they had done this was just mere months ago, the night they had possibly conceived Visenya. When Daemon’s hands touched every single inch of her body, soft and changed from all the babies she had carried. Back when Dragonstone was full of life and laughter.
Now there was a grim appearance to their ancestral home, more than usual. The metallic smell of blood hadn’t left Rhaenyra’s nose no matter how often the maids scrubbed the stone floors.
Daemon finished drying her and dressed her in her sleeping clothes. He sat behind her as he braided her damp hair into a singular long braid. Rhaenyra had exhausted herself from all her tears and her husband’s hands had slowly started lulling her to sleep. Daemon took Rhaenyra in his arms and carried her toward their bed pulling the covers over her body. He set Dark Sister to the side and sat himself against the headboard as Rhaenyra laid her head on his chest. He didn’t want to dare to leave her again (he had already left her too many times) afraid she’d try to do something again.
“Don’t leave me. Promise me you won’t leave me” she faintly whispered.
He kissed the crown of her head, “I promise”
If you don’t leave me too he left unsaid.
Rhaenyra’s eyelids slowly dropped as Daemon traced circles on her arms with his fingers. He watched her chest rise and fall as her breathing evened out and he finally felt like he could breathe too.
Rhaenyra found herself breathing a familiar fresh air, not like the salty air of Dragonstone, no, this was the air she grew up smelling from her childhood well into her adulthood. The smell of grass filled her nose and the sun shined on her face. She opened her eyes and looked up at the red leaves of the weirwood tree. She relished in the strange sense of peace she felt inside her chest. She didn’t feel like crying anymore.
“Muña?” She heard a female voice call behind her.
Rhaenyra turned and saw not a girl, but not yet a woman. She could be no older than seven and ten. Rhaenyra saw so much of herself in her. Her eyes were the same shade of lilac as her own, and her nose was almost spot on, but her lips, almost hooded eyes, and cheekbones were the same as hers. It was as if she was looking at a mirror.
Rhaenyra took a shot in the dark to guess who the young girl was, but deep in her gut she knew she was right.
“Visenya?”
Visenya smiles and runs towards her mother, her light pink dress and long silver hair flowing in the wind. “I’ve been looking for you. Kepa said you’d be here, come on Luke and Rhaena just got here from Driftmark and I need you to help me get ready.”
Rhaenyra watched in awe as her daughter talked on. Visenya stopped and sternly looked at her mother. “You always get like this every year,” she said.
Rhaenyra cocked her head to the side and her eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
Visenya began explaining, “Every year on my name day you get really emotional. You say it’s because I’m your last baby.”
Rhaenyra smiled and took Visenya’s hands in hers bringing them up to kiss her knuckles. “I just miss you sometimes”
“I’m not going anywhere, you and Kepa are in no hurry to marry me off. Well, I don’t think Kepa wants me to get married at all. The only reason he was fine with Baela and Rhaena getting married was because it was to Jace and Luke.” She confessed as she hooked her arm on her mother’s and began walking.
“And there is no need for you to get married” Rhaenyra stated. “Unless you want to. Do you have anyone in mind?” She asked her daughter as they walked through the garden.
Visenya shook her head no.
“Then it’s settled. No marriage for you anytime soon.”
They walked back inside the Red Keep. Then to Rhaenyra’s old childhood chambers. There was a completely different bed and the setup of the room had been changed. Visenya’s ladies’ maids had left a selection of gowns on the bed. Rhaenyra reached out to them admiring the styles and touching the different materials.
Visenya sat on a stool in front of her vanity table. She turned her head and looked back at Rhaenyra as if she was waiting for her. A normal occurrence for them. “Mom” she called.
“Hmm? Oh sorry” She walked over and stood behind her daughter. She looked down pressed a kiss on the top of her head and started braiding her hair as Visenya the conqueror’s.
Once finished, she pressed another kiss atop her daughter’s head. Visenya leaned in on her mother’s embrace as Rhaenyra wrapped her arms around her. “My sweet girl. You’re so grown up,” she said as tears threatened to spill from her eyes. She was so happy, all was good in this world, she didn’t want to wake up from this dream.
“I’m right here mom,” Visenya said unwrapping herself from Rhaenyra’s arms and turning to hug her burying her head in the crook of her mother’s neck.
After a few short minutes, they pulled away and walked toward the dresses on the bed. Visenya lay down examining all of them.
“Which one do you want to wear?” Rhaenyra asked excitedly. She loved having a daughter. She loved braiding her hair and picking her dresses. Doing all the things that were ripped from her in her world.
“Can I wear one of yours?” Visenya asked with a mischievous smile.
Rhaenyra was taken aback. “You want to wear one of mine?”
Her daughter nodded, “Yeah, I’m getting older, I’d like to try other styles, and since Baela and Rhaena don’t live with us anymore, I don’t have their dresses to try on.”
Rhaenyra smiled, “Of course my sweetling.”
Visenya jumped off the bed, took Rhaenyra’s hand, and pulled her out of the chambers. They walked the halls, Visenya leading the way. They made it to the King’s old chambers, which were now Rhaenyra’s. They entered and Rhaenyra saw her father’s old model of King’s Landing. It was dust-free and taken care of, unlike the last time she saw it. Before the war started and her daughter was safely nestled in her womb.
Visenya threw open the doors of the large wardrobe. Rhaenyra peaked inside at her abundance of dresses, a lot of Daemon’s clothes were there too. Visenya pulled out a black dress with embroidered dragons that were supposed to represent Syrax and Caraxes, and a squared low-cut at the front.
Rhaenyra raised her eyebrows at her daughter’s choice. “That one?”
Visenya nodded excitedly, “I love how it looks on you,”
“Well let’s hope it fits you,” Rhaenyra said and started helping Visenya get out of her dress.
She helped her put on the dress and tied it behind her, a perfect fit. Visenya smoothed out the skirt in front of her and looked at herself in the mirror. “I love it.”
Rhaenyra took a step back and admired her. “You look beautiful my sweet.”
“Thank you muña, ”
Rhaenyra walked over to the vanity table in the corner of the room. She opened the jewelry box that sat atop it and pulled out the Valaryian steel necklace Daemon gifted her. One of the many he had gifted her, but this one was the one he gave her that day in front of the iron throne.
She walked over to Visenya, who was already moving her braid to the side and clasped the necklace behind her neck. “Your father gifted this to me when I was around your age, many years before we married.”
Visenya touched the cool steel against her skin admiring it.
As if he was called on cue, the door opened and Daemon walked in. Rhaenyra turned and couldn’t help but smile at the sight of him. He looked older, there were more lines on his face around his mouth and forehead, yet her heart still pounded in her chest at the sight of him. To her, he was still the handsome man she had loved all her life.
He walked over to Visenya. His hard face softened at the sight of his youngest child, all grown up now. He noticed the necklace that rested on her neck. He took the pendant in his fingers and looked over at Rhaenyra. The pair smiled at each other as in a silent conversation. He let the pendant drop and kissed Visenya’s forehead. “Gevie. Like my mother and your mother.”
He went over to Rhaenyra and pressed a soft kiss on her lips. She smiled and wrapped her arms around his middle, resting her head on his chest.
“Baela and Jace just arrived from Dragonstone, they brought Daenaera” he said to Visenya.
Her face grew in excitement, “Really?” Daenaera was Jace and Baela’s first daughter, and Visenya’s favorite niece, born when she was but two years old. “May I go?” she asked Rhaenyra.
“Yes, you may.”
She kissed both her parent’s cheeks and skipped out of the chamber and into the hallway.
Rhaenyra and Daemon stood in the middle of the room still embracing each other. “Our darling girl,” he whispered.
“She’s so grown up now” she replied.
Daemon ducked his head down and pressed another deeper kiss on her lips. Rhaenyra felt her legs going weak and she had to hold on to the front of his doublet.
“Thank you for her. For all our children.”
Rhaenyra smiled as he peppered her face with kisses. She closed her eyes and relished the moment.
She opened them back again once she felt Daemon stop. She was back in bed in their chambers at Dragonstone. There was a fire burning in the hearth. She went to sit up but Daemon lightly pulled her back. “Go back to sleep” He whispered.
The harsh reality washed over Rhaenyra. She felt like crying again. There was no Visenya, no hair to braid, or dresses to try on. The only memories she’ll ever have of her sweet girl would be the dreams she made up in her head.
“Our girl. They killed our girl, and they shall pay for it.” She said as her voice cracked.
Daemon shifted on the bed, pulling her closer, “and they will.”