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About a decision

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'’It’s something I wanted to do, what it feels like a very long time now’ he said, a bit more slowly. ’And when we were so good during the summer, well, I wanted to do it even more. But I didn’t say, because, well, I don’t want to repalce your parents, De. I would never do that. It’s just… that… I hope that we can be a family as well? If you wanted?’
A hopeful, uncertain, green blink.
’And when will you change your mind?’ he asked softly.
’Never’ answered Sam, without missing a beat. ’If you are my kid, you are my kid forever. And your parent’s too, and my Dad’s and… You would be my kid. Period.’
’People always back of at some point’ wishpered Dean. ’I say the wrong things, I eat too much, I miss my Dad, or I’m not enough in some other way I don’t even get to know about.’

Notes:

Suprise! I promised this will happen at some point, and, well, here we are. I hope you will like it :)

Work Text:

Sam Winchester felt trapped, like he was running the same laps over and over again with this kid.

'Dean, could you stay for a moment, please?' he asked two days before the weekend started, after class. Singer paused, and closed the door to the room so they could be alone.

The boy was pale, and seemed to have lost weight since the summer: he looked sad, too, and Sam's heart began to ache for him. But he hardened his heart: the boy kept disappearing, and was already missing an astonishing number of classes.

’De, I don’t mean to be an asshole, I hope you know that’ said Sam. ’But your other teachers keep coming up to talk to me about the fact that you are skiping. Whats going on?’

A sad, green look.

’I just don’t see the point, anymore, Mr. Winchester’ he answered.

It did not escape Sam's attention that the boy did not respond to the nickname he had become accustomed to over the summer, and that he addressed him formally. Of course it was the better option, the more grown up perhaps, but it still hurt a little.

'I thought we had this sorted,' Sam said quietly, and he could hear the sadness in his voice. You can do it and you should graduate.'

'You don't know anything about anything, sir, so I'd like you out of my life from now on,' Dean snapped, and Sam felt as if he'd been slapped. There was no sign of their summer friendship.

A moment of silence passed between them, and Dean bowed his head.

’I’m sorry you feel that way, but I will try and respect your wish, Mr. Singer’ he then said, softly, but ceremoniously.

Dean winced: he also noticed the sudden change of form. He seemed even sadder now, and Sam wanted to comfort him, but he didn’t move.

You can’t have your cake, and eat it too, Sam thought sadly.

’Go on, Mr. Singer, or you will be late from next class’ he said softly, and Dean left the classroom with a nod.

*

'So, I hear your boy won't be with us much longer,' said Torian, when the next day Sam bumped into her in the corridor by the coffee machine.

’My boy?’ blinked Sam, who was tried, and yet again, had a terrible headache.

’Singer?’ asked the cem teacher. 'I heard that the Silver Forest is closing and the children are being placed in a new orphanage. The ones, of course, who weren't adopted or who didn't have the process started.'

’I just don’t see the point, anymore, Mr. Winchester’

 

 It made so much more sense now. A new placement, a new school for Dean yet again. Sam just blinked at Torian for a moment.

’You don't know anything about anything, sir.’

 

'Please excuse me, but I have to go now,' Winchester told the woman, and turned on his heel.

’You can’t help him, Sam’ Torian called after him, but the man just turned around, and smiled at her.

’Watch me, Tor’ he called back. ’Just watch me.’ He could still hear her good-natured laughter, then he turned into the next corridor.

If he remembered correctly, Dean was in a history class: he knocked on the right door and smiled sweetly at his colleague.

’Can I have a world with Mr. Singer, Collum, please?’ he asked, and just for a moment he questioned if he gone crazy or not.

Collum McAllen was a good man, and a bit off based in a good way, so of course, he said yes. Dean was even more pale, and sad looking, when he come out and closed the door behid himself.

’Look, Sir, I’m really sorry I was disrespectful to you, it’s just…’ Sam lifted a hand, and Dean fall silent.

'I've learned a few things since our last conversation, and I have a... proposition for you,' he said. He was just oozing nervousness, and Dean could see that. He raised a golden eyebrow.

'You might think I'm crazy, and of course you can say no, I won't be offended. I heard recently that the Forest is being closed and... never mind. I'd love to adopt you, if you don't have any objections.'

Here. He said it. God help him, he did.

Dean blinked at him.

’You want to adopt me, so I can finish school?’ he asked slowly.

’No!’ Sam said fastly. ’I mean yes, thats part of it, of course. I think you should finish school here, you deserve a chance, you are so smart, and…’ Sam takes a deep breath. ’But its not just that, you know? Of course, you don’t know, I never told you.’ Sam saw Dean smile very, very faintly out of the corner of his eye. Sam always babbled when he was nervous, like now.

’It’s something I wanted to do, what it feels like a very long time now’ he said, a bit more slowly. ’And when we were so good during the summer, well, I wanted to do it even more. But I didn’t say, because, well, I don’t want to repalce your parents, De. I would never do that. It’s just… that… I hope that we can be a family as well? If you wanted?’

A hopeful, uncertain, green blink.

’And when will you change your mind?’ he asked softly.

’Never’ answered Sam, without missing a beat. ’If you are my kid, you are my kid forever. And your parent’s too, and my Dad’s and… You would be my kid. Period.’

’People always back of at some point’ wishpered Dean. ’I say the wrong things, I eat too much, I miss my Dad, or I’m not enough in some other way I don’t even get to know about.’

’You can eat as much as you want’ shrugs Sam. ’Its just mean we need to do grocery runs together. I like talking to you, and missing your Dad is okay. As long as I’m allowed to miss mine, which I do. And no takebacks. If you are my kid, that means I’m part of your family too, if thats okay with you, and…’

Sam Winchester stoped because he just realised, Dean is crying without a sound, in the middle of the corridor.

’Oh, hey, Dean’ he said, a bit lamely, and akward. ’It’s fine, everything is fine. If you don’t want it, thats fine too. I just needed to try – that’s all..’

’I do want it’ Dean cut in, with big, green, shining eyes and a wet face, and the next moment, he was hugging Sam, which was unexpected, but good. He held the boy to him, and the boy put his head on his shoulder.

’Good’ Sam muttered, really, really gently. ’I want it very much, too.’

With one hand he gently stroked the back of Dean's neck, who was now hugging him even tighter.

’Don’t worry, man’ Sam said, kindly. ’It’s you and me now’ -

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