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Riddles For A Goon

Summary:

Trying to avoid Red Hood, Rex takes the day off and finds Riddler being ignored on the streets. Knowing that Riddler isn't that bad of a guy, Rex goes to talk to him.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

Rex was not going to work. He didn't even know how he could face Red Hood after sharing a bed and cuddling him. Rex cringed thinking about it. So, to him he deserved a day off. Even if he actually hasn't told Red Hood that he was doing this but oh well. That's a problem for future Rex.

 

Deciding that he needed fresh air, well, as fresh as the air gets in Gotham, he is pretty sure that all the fog and what the villains do mess up the air and create weird pollution but that doesn’t affect anyone, weirdly enough. Rex wasn’t complaining, even if he does seem like he is, as long as he can still live here he is happy. He would be more happy if he didn’t have to see Red Hood anymore, because how could Rex face his boss after cuddling him and drooling on him?

 

Rex shook his head not even wanting to think about what happened that night.

 

Grabbing a black hoodie, Rex slipped it onto his body. He wasn't on the heavy side but he did have a bit of a belly but that didn't stop Rex from buying bigger sized hoodies. He just loves how buggy and more warm they feel on him. With his hoodie on Rex grabbed his black cap that has the Batman logo on it. Now he was ready to face the cold winds of Gotham.

 

Walking down the street, Rex didn’t expect it to be so busy in the morning but that shouldn’t surprise Rex, after all in the morning is when villains aren’t around, or so Rex thought.

 

In the middle of the crowd, Rex saw flashes of a green suit and that normal means one thing. No one with a good fashion sense knows that a green suit isn’t that nice looking but one person seems to think so and that was The Riddler.

 

He was standing on the street trying to stop people to get them to talk to him but everyone just stopped and ignored him and sometimes even pushed him away. After multiple tries of trying to stop people and get them to talk to him Riddler seemed to give up and just crouched on the ground, his butt just not touching the sidewalk. 

 

Rex couldn’t help but feel a little bad. Sure, Riddler was a villain but Rex was a Goon and wasn’t the job of a Goon to protect a villain? Yes, he knows that Riddler isn’t his boss but he seemed sad and maybe hearing him out will not make him sad. Riddler wasn’t even the worst Villain in Gotham and unless their bosses were fighting, Villains never hurt other people’s Goons when just walking down the street.

 

Building up the confidence he needed, Rex stuck his hands in his hoodie’s pockets and walked over to Riddler.

 

Not wanting to show that he is coming over for pity reasons, Rex walked by. Getting as close as he could to Riddler without actually bumping into him or stepping on him. He seemed to have gotten Riddler’s attention because he looked up. His eyes met Rex’s and his sad frowned turned to a happy grin.

 

Riddler got off the ground and brushed the dirt off his pants.

 

“Hello, Young Man,” Riddler greeted, “Are you interested in a game?”

Rex stopped walking and faced Riddler. He seemed nervous like he thinks Rex would say no or be mean to him in some way. Instead Rex gave him a smile and agreed. 

 

“I have some riddles for you and if you don’t answer right…” Riddler went quiet, not knowing what the punishment would be, “If you lose… You’ll… have to give me your hat but if you win I’ll give you my green hat.”

 

“Seem’s fair,” Rex said.

 

“Riddle one! Kids can make it, but never hold it or see it. What is it?”

 

Rex thought about it. He didn't hang out with kids a lot. He does hang out with Robin but he doesn't think Robin is a normal kid. One of his friends Liam has a kid. He says that his kid makes a lot of noise. Especially when he comes back from school.

 

That's it!

 

“The answer is noise,” Rex said.

 

Riddler stayed quiet for a bit as if there was drumroll playing.

 

“That is… correct!” Riddler cheered.

 

Rex cheered in his head. He was surprised that he was good at this.

 

“Second one, What has hands, but can’t clap?”

 

Rex hummed on thought. People had hands but they could clap. He could guess animals or an animal but they don’t really have hands. Rex thought about other items that could be counted as hands and came up with a good reply.

 

“A clock?” Rex guessed, a bit unsure about this answer.

 

“That is….. CORRECT!” Riddler cheered, making a few people look at them as they walked by.

 

“The last one,” Riddler said, with a smirk on his face, “ What has a head and a tail but no body?”

 

Rex pulled a confused face. He couldn’t believe that Riddler would use this as a riddle. Especially  since there is a whole villain surrounding the answer.

 

“A coin,” Rex replied, already knowing the answer was right.

 

“You are… CORRECT!” Riddler cheered, “You have won the prize.”

 

Riddler took off his hat and flipped it in his hand before giving it to Rex.

 

Rex awkwardly took it. 

 

“This doesn't make me King of Riddles, right?” Rex asked.

 

Riddler looked him in the eyes.

 

“No, that is my title and no one will steal it from me,” Riddler’s mood changed, “you are good at riddles. You wanna work for me?”

 

Rex blinked in surprise. He didn't think talking to Riddler would turn into offering to be a Goon for him. But Rex knew he couldn't take the offer.

 

“I'm sorry, Riddler. I'm already a Goon for Red Hood,” Rex explained.

 

Riddler sighed in disappointment.

 

“Well, if you ever change your mind I’ll always have a spot opened for you.”

 

With that Riddler turned away and walked down the street, leaving Rex alone.

 

Rex looked down at the green hat in his hands and smiled. He has no idea what he would do with this hat. He would never wear it. Maybe he could put it on one of his giant plushies. Rex giggled quietly at the thought of turning one of his plushies into Riddler. With that idea in his mind, Rex started walking down the street heading back to his apartment.




On the other side of the street, close to where Rex and Riddler were talking, stood a man with black hair and blue eyes. He didn't look happy at the interaction between Rex and Riddler. He knows has to tell Jason, well Red Hood, he just hopes that his little brother will listen to what he has to say. Especially since Hood doesn't want him around Rex.



THE END

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