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Ash had dated far more people than Gary probably ever would, but he was an incredibly faithful person.
Still, Gary sometimes found himself getting foolishly caught up in the odd little reference Ash made. The taste of Brock's rice-balls and how they were always just a little too sweet. The fact that him and Iris would always sneak sweets from Clian when he wasn't looking. The way that Goh used to give him all the scraps that he didn't eat because he knew that Ash was always hungry. The way that Serena baked stories into her pokepuffs.
Actually, a lot of the few references Ash made to his exes were about food.
Once Gary realized that, he got a little self-conscious. Neither him nor Ash were very good cooks and though Gary could make a mean canned-beans, he wasn't great at much else to do with cooking.
Thinking like that, Gary's mind started wandering.
If there was one thing he was insecure about, it was his worth. Deep down, Gary sometimes didn't feel like enough. Ash had, of course, never given any indication that this was even true, but in the dark of the night it still sometimes kept Gary awake.
Just knowing that he wasn't technically the first...
It was stupid. He knew it was.
Still, it was hard to get his mind out of that gutter once it fell into it. He knew it wasn't a healthy insecurity, and if anything it would do more harm than good because Ash was loyal and he knew that. Still, he just couldn't wipe it out of his head.
Over something as minor as pokepuffs.
Pokepuffs...
Oh! He had an idea.
If he couldn't seem to wipe his self-deprecating insecurity away, he could at least try to lean into the references that had brought along the whole issue to start with! He wasn't good at cooking, that was for sure, but he didn't see what could go wrong. There was no harm in it, anyway.
That was how Gary ended up in the kitchen early before work, desperately trying to chop up onions to put in his potato leak soup. In his hazy, early morning brain, Gary couldn't quite remember if there even were onions in this recipe, but it was too late to go back. He dumped the chopped onions in the pot and watched them splop through the already mashed potatoes.
Huh, that didn't look quite right. Maybe it needed more leak?
He quickly shredded more leak and dumped it into the pot. Unlike the chunks of onion, it floated atop the potato mixture like a weirdly shaped garnish. Then Gary wished that he had chopped the leak more evenly or at least into a more attractive shape.
Think Gary, he thought to himself, think!
Maybe he could try blending it once more?
He quickly picked the immersion blender that Delia had given him and got to work. Once the green leaks disappeared into the soup and there were no more onion chunks at the bottom of the pot, he felt a little better. He still felt like he had done something massively wrong, though, and he swallowed. Maybe if he-
But just then, he heard Ash's feet hit the bottom stair.
"What are you cooking?" Ash yawned, rubbing his eyes.
And as Gary stared- like a deerling caught in headlights- at Ash in his black T-shirt and shorts (rubbing his eyes and looking downright exhausted), Gary realized that potato leak soup wasn't exactly breakfast food. "Uh," he tried to sound clever, but a pang of insecurity came back and his voice faltered, "Um, I made potato leak soup?"
Ash cocked his head to one side, surveying the mess of the kitchen. "Oh wow," he said.
Gary blushed as Ash quickly crossed the kitchen and peered into the pot. "I don't think I did it quite right, though," he managed, just barely keeping from stammering.
But before Gary could tell him that the soup wasn't done, Ash picked up a spoon and scooped out some of the goopy, potato-filled soup. Gary felt almost like he was going to pass out as Ash quickly slurped up the soup. It's horrible, it has to be, his brain spun.
...But, to Gary's complete shock, Ash smiled at him.
"This is really good!" he grinned, "It's still warm, too,"
Gary struggled to process this. He had managed to cook something that actually tasted good? Ash actually liked it? All he managed was a breathy, half-gasping, "...Really?"
Ash nodded.
He quickly pulled out a bowl and ladled himself some. Gary felt like the world had turned upside-down, so happy he was that his plan had somehow worked. He hardly noticed when Ash looked up and titled his head to the side.
"-but," Ash questioned, "why did you make this?"
Gary swallowed.
He thought about Brock and the rice-balls, and Iris and the sweets, and Goh and the scraps, and Serena and her stories.
"Um," he coughed (careful to lean away from the soup), "Well, I remembered all the stuff you mentioned about your... ex partners and how their cooked,"
Ash stared at him for a moment, then seemed to get sad. "Oh Gary, you didn't think that-?"
Gary shook his head furiously, "I wasn't being accusational or anything! I promise; I just wanted to try doing something like that,"
Ash set down his bowl on the counter and swept his boyfriend into a hug. Gary blushed down the the roots of his hair.
"Thank you, really," Ash murmured in his ear.
Gary swallowed, "No problem,"
Ash squeezed him tight, and then leaned away from the hug, smiling up at him. "But you didn't have to. You've got loads of other great stuff that none of them did, seriously. How many times have you seen Brock win against my pokemon?"
Then, Ash looked side to side like he was checking to make sure no one was listening. He leaned in close, and whispered. "But I wouldn't complain if you did keep cooking for me sometimes..."
Gary laughed, for now forgetting about all of the insecurity. None of that mattered, not at all.
"I'll think about it," he smiled.