Work Text:
The cover I used as inspo for this fic : Vincent ¬ Sophia Kruithof
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02 November 2024
Charles didn’t want to look at his phone. Not at all. He went to sleep last night after he had shut off his phone and he was scared to turn it back on. Normally he was glued to his phone. Pierre always made fun of him for it. However, now he was afraid of what he’d see when he turned his phone back on. He had done something, you see. Something he wasn’t sure if he regretted or not. Quite frankly, he wasn’t ready to find out. So instead he just kept staring at the black phone screen lying in front of him on the table.
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Max awoke to the sound of his phone ringing. He groaned, normally it was on silent but he might’ve forgotten that last night. Or someone was calling him so many times right after another that the safety feature had kicked in and started ringing anyway. When he looked at his phone to see who was calling him, it had to be the latter option.
“Lando it’s fucking-” Max started and quickly looked at the time.
“- 7:30! Why are you calling me?” he said, very very annoyed. He loved the Brit but he hated being woken up, especially on his day off.
“You’ve got to see what Charles did! He released a song!” Lando exclaimed on the other end of the line.
Max frowned, what was so special about that? Charles released music more often, being quite the piano lover. “And that’s special because? He has like 7 songs uploaded already.”
“First of all, why do you know the exact number? But second, he sings Max! He actually, genuinely sings!” Lando said adamantly.
That got Max seated straight up in his bed. “He what?!” he asks the Brit. “Yeah! Insane right? And he’s actually not all that bad. The song is quite sad though,” Lando said.
“It is?” Max asked worriedly, “What’s it about?”
“I don’t know, mate. Like, nobody knows. It just got released randomly. He hasn’t said anything about it on his socials or on text either. It was just… there. I tried texting him but my texts aren't coming through,” The Brit explains, sounding kinda worried.
“Fuck, okay, uhmmmm. I’ll- I’ll go check on him. I’ll call you back,” Max said hurriedly, while springing out of bed in the meantime. “Yeah, okay. Good luck! Let me know if everything’s alright, okay?” Lando asked and Max made an affirmative noise before ending the call.
He immediately went to his spotify and searched Charles’ profile. The first song that popped up under
“New release”
Was a song named “Vincent”. Max got goosebumps all over. He didn’t like this. His mind immediately went back to a conversation he very much dreaded at this moment. He clicked play and sat down somewhere.
Max was surprised to hear the guitar instead of the piano. He didn’t know Charles played the guitar. The voice started singing and it was very clear that this was Charles himself. Max would recognise that voice anywhere. He listened but with every lyric his heart sank more. The song itself was absolutely beautiful . He did not know Charles could sing this wonderfully.
The lyrics however, gave him goosebumps all over. It was sad, everyone could hear that but Max knew . He knew exactly what these meant. His mind transported him a few weeks back when a drunk Charles had called him, asking him if he was home.
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“Are you home?” Charles asked, slurring his words a little. Max frowned at his phone and looked at the time, it was 9 pm.
“Yes… why? Are you drunk?” Max asked back. Charles giggled a bit and then responded with, “I might be… a little bit. I’m on your doorstep.”
“You’re what? Why are you at my doorstep?” the Dutchman asked, confused and walked to his front door. Only to see the Monegasque standing on his doormat, when he opened the door.
“Maxieeeeeeee,” Charles said with a sloppy grin and stumbled inside. “Charles, take off your shoes first,” Max said sternly and the Monegasque promptly tried to bend down and remove his shoes, almost falling down in the process. Max chuckled a little and said, “Wait, wait, let me help.”
Charles held on to the wall while Max helped to take off his shoes. “Done,” Max said as he looked up with a smile, only to find that the Ferrari driver was already looking at him. “Hey,” he said softly. “Hi,” Charles smiled back. “Are you alright?,” Max asked. Charles stayed silent for a long time.
“Could I stay with you for a while?” the Monegasque asked in a small voice. Max had never seen the other driver look so vulnerable and he couldn’t do anything other than nod. He let him to the sofa and went into the kitchen to get something to drink.
When he got back, Charles had already curled up in the corner with a blanket thrown over himself. Max took a seat next to him and turned to face the Monegasque. “Want to talk about it?” he asked with a soft smile.
Charles looked away and Max saw the tears forming in his eyes. “I uhh- Am I not good enough?” He suddenly asked, turning back to face Max. The Dutchman frowned, “What? Of course not! Did someone say that to you? Who was it? I’ll-”
“No, not someone specifically,” Charles whispered, cutting the Dutchman off. He sniffed and continued, “I mean people say it all the time. How I’m not performing well enough, that I make too many mistakes, that they should’ve sacked me instead of Carlos.”
“Can’t people see that I’m trying?” he said as his voice broke and tears started to stream over his cheeks. “I try every. Single. Day. But it is never good enough.”
“Oh, Charlie,” Max said sadly, “Come here.” He motioned for the Monegasque to scoot closer together and Max took the crying man in his arms.
“Of course, you are good enough,” He said into Charles’ hair. “You are an incredibly talented driver and you should never ever think otherwise. Those people on the internet? Ignore them. They don’t drive the car, you do. We know that you try, Charlie. I know that,”
Charles cried into Max’s shoulder while Max tried to rub soothing circles on his back and combed through his hair. Max had known Charles had been struggling a bit. He just didn’t know it had gotten so bad. There was so much pressure on the Monegasque to perform. From Ferrari, from the fans, even from other teams and drivers.
“Sometimes,” Charles said when he calmed down a bit, “Sometimes I feel a bit like Vincent van Gogh. Do you know him?” The Ferrari driver looked up at Max with a questioning gaze. Max snorted a little, “Only you could bring up some old painter into a conversation like this.”
“I read an article about him yesterday. People thought he was crazy, you know,” Charles said as he looked down again, still firmly pressed against the Dutchman. “But in reality, he was just sick. He had a mental illness. No one understood him and sometimes… It feels like nobody understands me.”
“The pressure, the media, the travelling, everything. They only see the fun part of it. Like how people only see the beauty in van Gogh’s paintings but they don’t know the full story…”
“And then there’s the added pressure of Jules and papa, as well. You are the only person that sees me, really sees me .”
“Me?” Max asked, confused. Charles nodded into Max’s chest. Max had no idea why Charles felt that way. He had never had to go through the trauma of losing someone so close to him and Red Bull didn’t nearly put as much pressure on him as Ferrari did on Charles. He was honoured, though. He liked to think he had gotten to know Charles pretty well over the last few years. He had always tried to be there for him. Cheer him on or cheer him up. Laugh with him when he is happy or comfort him when he is sad. He always tried to make sure Charles was happy, though.
Max had no idea when exactly he had started to care so much for the Monegasque but he did. He was the first person to defend him when the media tried to say shit about him and he always told Charles he was there for him whenever he needed. He had gotten quite protective over the man.
“I will always listen to you, Charlie. Always,” he said as he buried his face into the other man's hair. “I’m here for you, whenever you need it. Even if it’s in the middle of the night and you know how much I love my sleep.”
That got a chuckle out of the Monegasque and Max smiled slightly. They sat there all evening, Max holding the younger man tightly. It didn’t take long until he felt Charles’ breath even out. He buried his face into his hair even more. He never wanted to see him so sad ever again. He didn’t like it. He swore right there that he would always protect the Ferrari driver.
When Max woke up the next morning, on his sofa, Charles was gone. There was a note on the table that said, “Thanks for letting me stay for a while :)”
When they returned back to racing the following weekend Charles had seemed somewhat back to his normal state but Max had tried to keep an extra careful eye on him anyways. Not careful enough though, apparently. He ran to his room to pull on some joggers and a shirt while calling Charles.
The phone rang and rang but no one picked up. Max cursed to himself as he desperately tried to get his shoes on. After that he grabbed his keys and ran out the door to the elevator. He tried calling again while desperately clicking on the elevator button.
“Come onnnnn. Come on!” He said impatiently to the elevator as well as his phone. He knew Charles wasn’t going to pick up, though. He had most likely shut off his phone. The elevator doors finally opened and he got inside. It felt like hours to get to his car alone and even traffic seemed to get in his way. Every traffic light he needed to pass seemed to be red. He probably drove way too fast but he didn’t really care at the moment. His breathing had quickend significantly and he had never felt like he felt at this moment.
He stopped with screeching tyres in front of Charles’ apartment building and sprinted inside. He didn’t even wait for the elevator but ran all 5 flights of stairs instead. When he finally arrived on Charles’ floor and started to pound on the door, he was thoroughly hyperventilating.
“Charles? Are you there? Please open the door!” he yelled, even to his own ears he sounded pathetically desperate but screw that. He was worried, okay? He heard some movement inside and finally the door opened. It revealed a very dishevelled looking Charles. “Max?” he asked, confused. Before he could say something else though, Max had already flung his arms over the Monegasque’s shoulders and squeezed him tightly. It took a second before the other man relaxed but when he did, he squeezed back. After what felt like an eternity, Max let go enough to look Charles in the eyes.
“Are you okay? Are you hurt? How do you feel?” Max shot out question after question, not even giving Charles the time to answer one of them. “I couldn’t reach you! You didn’t pick up and I called you a thousand times! I- I thought something happened! Please, don’t ever do that again. Please, please ,” he continued frantically while he pressed his forehead against Charles’.
The panic he had felt not knowing if Charles was okay was not something he wanted to experience ever again. He hadn’t ever felt this panicked in his entire life. He didn’t even know why he had panicked as much as he had.
“Yeah, I’m fine, Max,” Charles whispered as he grabbed the Dutchman’s face and caressed his cheeks with his thumbs. “I just… I was just scared of what people were going to say about the song and I wasn’t ready to see their reactions yet. I’m sorry if I scared you, I never meant for that to happen,” he added with a small smile.
“It’s just… those lyrics. Our conversation from a few months back… It all came back to me and then you didn’t respond and I-” Max choked out. “Shhh, I’m alright, Maxie,” the Monegasque whispered again. Their foreheads were still firmly pressed against each other and Charles' hands were still holding Max’s cheeks.
“I wrote the song the day after that evening,” the Ferrari driver explained, “I got help after that. I talk to someone once a week and that really helps. I promise I’m okay, I just really wanted that song to be heard. It’s a moment I’m not necessarily proud of but it needs to be heard too. We’re not perfect, we’re just human and I wanted people to see that.”
“I was just a bit scared about the reactions. Not only about the lyrics themselves but…. My singing,” Charles said shyly. “Charles, it was beautiful. I didn’t know you could sing. I’m just… really, really glad you’re okay,” Max said with a small smile. Charles smiled back and they just stared at each other for a while. Max’s breathing was still a bit quicker than it normally was, the panic having not quite gone down yet.
“Were you really that worried about me?” Charles whispered then, wonder in his eyes. Max nodded slightly. “I think I broke the speed limit by at least 80 km/h” Max with a small shrug. Charles let out a loud laugh as he threw his head back. Max could only stare in wonder at the other man.
“Maxxxxxx, you can’t do that! What if you get a speeding ticket?” He asked, laughing. “What if you were hurt? I find that a lot more important than a stupid speeding ticket,” Max said seriously but with a smile creeping around the corners of his mouth. “I’m glad you care so much,” Charles said with a giggle. “Of course I care about you! I care about you a lot,” Max said seriously.
The mood suddenly changed drastically as Max looked at the Monegasque in front of him. Charles’ eyes darkened significantly and the Dutchman flicked his eyes to the Monegasque’s lips. “Max,” Charles whined and it didn’t take long for Max to smash his lips against Charles’. They made out for a solid five minutes until Charles broke loose. He smiled one of those million dollar smiles, dimples and all and Max genuinely wondered why it had taken him so long to realise this.
He was in love with Charles freaking Leclerc.
Suddenly Charles started to giggle which changed into full blown laughter. Max had to laugh too, “Why are you laughing?” Charles kept laughing as he said, “We’ve been standing in the hallway for an hour, Max.”
Realising that, the Dutchman chuckled along with the Monegasque, still wondering how it could be that he was so lucky.
“I love you,” He said suddenly. He couldn’t hold it in anymore. He might’ve only just realised he loved the Monegasque but he now knew he had loved him for a very long time already.
“Took you long enough,” Charles said with a smile as he kissed him again.
“I love you, too,” the Monegasque whispered in between kisses and Max? He had never felt happier in his entire life.
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When Charles finally turned his phone back on a few hours later it was completely overflowing with texts from family and friends telling him how beautiful the song was.
“Holy shit,” Charles whispered with wide eyes.
“What? What’s wrong?” Max asked.
Charles smiled a smile so wide Max was afraid his face would break as he showed his phone to him. “Vincent is the number 1 song in 67 countries!”
“Congratulations, Charlie,” Max said with a huge smile as he hugged him.
“Don’t ever doubt yourself,” the Dutchman whispered into the Monegasque’s hair, just like all those months ago.
“I cannot promise that and you know it but I’ll try my best,” Charles answered.
“You always do,” Max said as he kissed the top of Charles’ head.
“Always,” Charles agreed.
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When Charles had fallen asleep again a little later, Max grabbed his phone and took a selfie of them with Charles sleeping curled up on his chest.
Max: He’s okay :)
Lando: Thank god
Lando: Also
Lando: FUCKING FINALLY
Lando: You’ve been dancing around each other for literal YEARS
Lando: Now you can be all cutesy on Christmas :D
Max: Shut up, Norris