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Muriel had never been granted a corporation before. In Heaven, angels didn’t need bodies. And Muriel had never left Heaven until now, until this exciting new assignment.
Their mind whirled with all the changes. First investigating a miracle, and then getting put in charge of a bookshop, and reading books, and making friends…
It was a dream come true. Well, not the bookshop part. Muriel had only vaguely known of the existence of bookshops before coming to Earth and knocking on the door of this one. But getting to go new places and making friends? It was amazing!
Having a body was strange, though. Muriel still hadn’t tried any food or drink, but sometimes the food and drinks in the coffee shop smelled good. And they got tired sometimes now. Not tired enough to do what the humans called “sleeping”, but tired enough that they finally tried laying down in one of the bookshop beds.
And when Muriel sat back up after twenty minutes of longing to start another book, their hair felt weird. Different.
“Ooh.” Reaching around, Muriel felt at their hair. It was all bunched up, with strange waves that hadn’t quite been there before. “I wonder why it does that.”
And what else could it do? Humans wore their hair in so many different ways. And at different lengths. But they didn’t have miracles, so how did they take care of it?
Curious, Muriel looked around the bookshop for a book all about hair. But there didn’t seem to be anything specifically on that topic.
“Hmm. If I’m a bookshop owner,” Muriel said to the empty bookshop, “maybe I should try doing my hair like one.”
So far, the only bookshop owner Muriel had met was Supreme Archangel Aziraphale. Well, former bookshop owner. And since he was the Supreme Archangel, he must know everything, and he definitely knew what bookshop owners were supposed to look like.
Muriel tugged on their waistcoat and straightened their bow tie. They’d miracled up a proper bookshop owner’s outfit to replace the human police officer uniform weeks ago. Maybe doing the hair right would make the disguise even more convincing.
Eager, Muriel went to one of the mirrors and looked in. Right now, the hair was really messy and sticking up all over the place. So, things were definitely heading in the right direction to look like a bookshop owner.
Still not sure what to do, they slid their fingers through the dark waves and tried to fluff it up more. But it didn’t quite seem to work the same way as Supreme Archangel Aziraphale’s hair. It just got puffier and stuck out strangely.
Muriel giggled, combing it straight up with their fingers, and watched as parts of it drifted back down. This didn’t look right, but it was fun to play with.
Maybe it would be a good idea to ask the humans for help. Maggie and Nina each had hair, and they were Muriel’s friends now. Maybe one of them would know what to do.
Muriel checked over their outfit, making sure they looked proper aside from the hair thing, and then went across the street to the coffee shop. It looked pretty empty, aside from Nina behind the counter and Maggie sitting at a table.
Pushing the door open, Muriel waved enthusiastically. “Hello! I think I need help with my hair.”
“You think?” Nina straightened up from unpacking tea boxes. “You look like you stuck your finger in a socket and bloody electrocuted yourself!”
“Nina, really? I thought we talked about being more polite.” Chuckling, Maggie set down a clipboard, stood, and gestured for Muriel to come in. “What can we do to help?”
“Sorry.” Muriel gave an apologetic smile as they closed the door. “I didn’t mean to interrupt if you were working or anything. I can come back later if you want to do… whatever you’re doing?”
“Inventory,” Nina said in a grim voice. “We’re doing inventory.”
Unsure what that meant, Muriel glanced to Maggie.
“It means we’re figuring out what sort of things Nina has hiding in the corners of the coffee shop.” Maggie carried over the clipboard and showed it to Muriel. “See, I’m keeping track of things, like boxes of tea, so Nina knows what to order.”
“Oh!” Muriel brightened. “That sounds really fun. I’ll bet you really want to get back to that.”
“Inventory is the opposite of fun.” Lips pursed, Nina crossed her arms and leaned back on the counter behind her. She jerked her chin towards Muriel. “All right, out with it. What’s with the hair?”
“Well, I tried to make it stick up and look cool, but it mostly just sticks up and looks messy.” Muriel ran their fingers through it again, demonstrating. “I thought I should look like a proper bookshop owner, since I run a bookshop now, but…”
“Oh, hold on. I see the problem here.” Sighing, Nina came around the counter. “Were you trying to look like Mr. Fell? I don’t think your hair’s right for that.”
Muriel nodded. “It doesn’t seem to be. But I don’t know what it is right for. I never had a body before.”
The coffee shop was silent for a moment.
Then Nina shook her head again. “Right. Okay. That’s my quota of weird for the day. Are you ready to try any tea yet? Or coffee?”
Muriel hesitated. It did smell nice in here, lots of different scents, and humans really seemed to like ingesting things. But angels weren’t supposed to sully the celestial temple of their bodies, when they had bodies. “No thanks. I just really need help with my hair. I don’t know how to fix it.”
“Of course you don’t know. Never had a body before, it’s no wonder you don’t know what to do with it.” Maggie gave a kind smile. “Can I ask, do you really want to look like Mr. Fell? Or is that just what you felt like you were supposed to do?”
“Well, I am a bookshop owner.” Muriel gestured to their outfit. “I have to look the part.”
“So that’s why you’re dressing like someone who wandered out of a old painting from nineteenth century, eh?” Tearing open a box of tea, Nina gestured to the bow tie. “Do you actually like wearing that?”
“I… don’t know.” A little shiver went through Muriel. “I’ve never had a body. I don’t really know what I like.”
“Well, that’s all right. We can help you figure it out, can’t we?” Smiling, Maggie tilted her head and studied Muriel’s hair. “Why don’t we just start with getting your hair back to normal a bit, hmm? So it’s not quite so puffy.”
“Oh, yes. That would be really good. It just kept getting more…” Unsure how to describe it, Muriel just pointed at it. “And I couldn’t really get it to stop looking like a cloud.”
“Hmm, let’s see. Why don’t we wet it down a bit, and then brush it out?” Gently, Maggie rested a hand on the back of her arm. “Nina, we’ll be right back. Can you make me a tea too?”
“On it. And use the sink in the loo.” Nina stretched an arm out, blocking the one near her. “No hair in my workspace.”
“But you have hair,” Muriel said, confused.
“Oh, she only means we don’t want to get loose hair by the food and such. Come on, now.” Maggie steered Muriel off to a little room at the back of the coffee shop. “Here, let’s rinse your hair in the sink.”
“Why?”
“It’s a little easier to deal with hair when it’s wet,” Maggie said, “especially if you’ve got some curls. And yours is normally a little curly, isn’t it? Or at least wavy?”
“I don’t really know what any of that means. I think so.” Muriel shrugged. “But I’m not sure. Like I said, I’m new to this whole body thing.”
“That must be so confusing sometimes. Bodies can really be a lot to deal with. Don’t worry, though, we can help.” Maggie smiled a little and rested a hand on the back of Muriel’s neck. “Here, can you put your head under the tap for me?”
Muriel didn’t really know what that meant either, but they did it. Water ran across the back of their head, and they shivered. “That’s cold!”
“Sorry, sorry! Here we go, just a second. I’ll warm it up.” Maggie did something with the sink and then touched their hair, fingers sliding gently through it. “There, how does that feel? Okay?”
“It’s still kind of cold.” It was warming up now, though. And the careful touches felt really nice. That almost made Muriel feel tired again. Or sleepy? It was so hard to know how to describe things about bodies. “I like it, though. This is going to make it not stick out all over?”
“Well, it’ll stop it from sticking out more when I brush it. Or when you brush it.” Maggie combed her fingers though Muriel’s hair again, and then the water stopped. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t assume. Can I brush it for you?”
“Yep, you can totally do it!” Muriel laughed, enjoying the cool new sensations. “I really don’t know anything about hair. It’s so interesting, but I don’t know anything about it.”
“It’ll be so fun for you to learn all about it. Here, let’s get a towel and pat this a little bit dry so it’s not dripping everywhere…”
Muriel let Maggie towel their hair, then straightened up and looked in the mirror. Their hair looked longer now. “Weird, why is it all straight and stuff now?”
“That’s just because it’s wet. It’ll go back to normal once it dries.”
They went back to the front of the coffee shop, and Muriel sat in a chair. There was a cup of tea at their spot already, and they eyed it. “Um. Did you make that for me?”
“Figured as long as I was already making two cups, I might as well make a third.” Nina came over and sat, leaning back in the chair. “You don’t have to drink it. But if you want it, it’s there.”
“It’s there, all right!” Muriel giggled, a little nervously this time. The tea smelled really good. Almost good enough to try it. “Um, what sort of tea is it?”
Maggie breathed in deeply through her nose as she picked up her own cup. “Mmm, that smells like mint. Nice and refreshing.”
“Have you ever had wine?” Nina asked Muriel. “If you want refreshing…”
“Oh, come on. Muriel hasn’t even tried tea yet, don’t start off by getting them drunk!” Shaking her head, Maggie chuckled. She took a sip of her tea, then went to dig in what she’d called a “handbag” when Muriel asked last week. “There we are! Knew I had a comb in here somewhere. Now, you don’t really want your hair to stick up like Mr. Fell’s, do you?”
Muriel shrugged a little. “I don’t think so, not really. But I don’t know what I do want it to do.”
“Anything that isn’t sticking up everywhere,” Nina said, a little smile on her face. “Seriously, though. You’ve got plenty of time, you can figure it out.”
“She’s right, you know. I think for now…” Biting her lip, Maggie looked Muriel over. “Let’s just comb it to start, shall we? And then while it dries, I can look up some hairstyles on my phone. Ooh, and maybe some cute little accessories, too!”
“Okay!” Pleased, Muriel settled back in the chair and wiggled. “Comb away, then!”
The comb ran through Muriel’s hair, a slow stroke that paused whenever it caught a bit. Maggie explained that some of the hair was “tangled”, and she worked carefully to “untangle” it. Muriel just sat there, a little bit lost but enjoying it.
Having hair combed felt really nice. It was really relaxing, and Muriel found their eyes drifting shut. Each slow stroke sent a sort of tingly feeling across Muriel’s scalp.
“There, that looks much better, doesn’t it?” Maggie ran a hand over their hair, and Muriel leaned into the touch. “Here, I had a little mirror in my handbag too. Take a look.”
Muriel reluctantly opened their eyes, almost tired again—or sleepy—and looked in the mirror. Their hair was already getting some curls back, like it was drying, and they smiled. “Wow, that looks really great! Thanks! That’s much better than it being a big fluffy cloud.”
“It really is.” Nina shook her head a little, looking Muriel over. “And if you decide to lose the nineteenth century style, let us know. We can help with that, too.”
“Oh.” Muriel tugged at the waistcoat. “I dunno. I kind of like it. But it might be fun to try some other clothes too.”
“There you are, then. We’ll get you some options for everything.” With a pleased sigh, Maggie sank into her chair again and picked up her tea. “Oops, it’s gone a bit cold. Maybe I’ll—”
“Oh! I can help with that!” Wiggling, Muriel straightened up. They snapped their fingers, heating the tea. “There! Now it’s nice and hot again!”
“That’s still weird,” Nina muttered.
“Oh, be nice.” Maggie laughed, holding onto the cup. “Thank you, Muriel, that’s really sweet.”
“No, thank you. You’re both really good friends.” Nervous, Muriel twisted their fingers together. Then they picked up the cup of mint tea, sniffed it, and took a tiny sip. “Wow! It’s hot, but it makes my tongue feel cold…”
Nina raised her own cup of tea. “Well done. Cheers.”
Muriel giggled. “Cheers!”
It was still really intimidating to know how much there was to learn about having a body. But hair was really cool and fun to play with, and tea might actually be pretty great to drink. Being on Earth really was a dream come true.