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Burnt Offerings

Summary:

The dry twigs and grass ignited, a beautiful orange and red inferno licked the rafters. Shyvana stared in awe, she couldn’t have made a more wonderful fire if she tried. The smell of smoke and burnt food mixed with burning sweetgrass and hints of wood smoke in a heavenly scent.

Burning… wood…

The house!

---

Shyvana tries to bake a cake and nearly burns down the house. Luckily, she has friends who can help her.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

By the gods, why did this have to happen today?

Shyvana grabbed the pan, yanking it out of the fire. While the scent of charred bread was enticing to her nose, she remembered the last time she tried to cook for Quinn. That was the same day she learned humans only had two sharp teeth meant for tearing tough bits of meat.

Shyvana ran her tongue over her fangs as she bent down to pick up the scalding pan. The oven mitts combined with the slick, well-seasoned cast iron to create a recipe for disaster. The pan (and cake!) went flying into Valor’s old nest. Which Shyvana should have cleaned up long ago.

The dry twigs and grass ignited, a beautiful orange and red inferno licked the rafters. Shyvana stared in awe, she couldn’t have made a more wonderful fire if she tried. The smell of smoke and burnt food mixed with burning sweetgrass and hints of wood smoke in a heavenly scent.

Burning… wood…

The house!

Shyvana sprung forward, stomping on the dried grass, trying to smother it with her body. While the heat felt nice, she knew she needed to get rid of this fire before it brought down the entire house. What did people use to put out fires?

Water!

She charged out of the house and to the well, cranking the handle so hard it broke off in her hands. The rope spun, and the bucket plunged back to the bottom with a splash.

Gods damn it all! Why was this happening today! Fury simmered inside her.

The river then!

She transformed, body warping and twisting and growing into a mass of muscle, scales, and fury. Wind blasted past her as she streaked toward the river, diving down into the cool water and scooping up as much as she could into her mouth. The house still stood when she returned, although the thatch had started to smolder in her absence. If this took much longer, the entire house would be ablaze.

Steam sizzled and rose to the roof as she sprayed the water out of her mouth, dousing the remains of Valor’s nest. She directed the spray up, making sure to destroy any embers remaining in the dry thatch. Shyvana stood for a moment, taking stock of the situation as she slowly returned to her smaller form.

Black soot covered the stone wall, the wooden rafters were charred and flaking in some parts. A large hole in the roof let streams of light into the house, dust and ash mingling in the bright yellow beam. The pan (and cake!) were flattened, a perfect dragon footprint stamped into the glowing orange iron. Maybe this was the “pan-cake” Quinn talked about so longingly?

No time for that! She only had the afternoon!

She groaned. She had no idea what she was doing. Who knew how to bake a cake?

 


 

“Hey Shyvana!” Lux chirped, eyes widening as she looked up at the roof, at the large black stain on the wall. “Wha…”

“That is not even close to the problem!” Shyvana growled, gesturing at the pan-cake on the ground.

“Oh! Is this your first attempt?” Lux asked, poking at the flattened cast-iron pan with the tip of her boot.

“Of sorts. I am trying to create a cake,” Shyvana said, gesturing at the atrocity of ingredients on the kitchen table.

“You’re… baking a cake?” Lux asked, standing on her toes to try to see the table behind Shyvana. “I can help!”

She picked up the mixing bowl, grimacing at the contents. “We need to wash this out first,” she said, walking out the door to the well. Shyvana opened her mouth to say something, but was too late.

“Shyvana?” Lux asked. “Where is the handle?”

“A mile or so west,” Shyvana mumbled.

“Did you say… a mile?” Lux asked, looking off to the west, through the towering silver petricite trees.

“I got mad, I threw it, it’s not that big a deal, okay?” Shyvana grumbled. “I can just go get us some water with my mouth!” She was frustrated now, she could easily channel that into enough anger to transform.

“Wait! You can’t do that! It’s unsanitary!” Lux pleaded, stopping her just in time.

“Then what do we do then!” Shyvana demanded. They were wasting time.

Lux thought for a moment, looking at the splintered wood of the well crank. “I know someone who can help!”

 


 

“What in the gods’ names happened here?” Garen gasped. “Lux said you needed help fixing the well, not the whole damn house!”

Lux and Shyvana turned to the house, taking in the scorched hole in the roof, the blistered wooden beams. “Ohh…” Lux said. “Right.”

“That is no matter!” Shyvana hissed. “The priority is the cake!”

“Cake?” Garen scratched his head.

“Yes, the cake! That’s what I’ve been trying to do all morning!” Shyvana was growing annoyed now. Before long, all of Demacia would be witness to her failure.

“I think the fact that your house almost burned down should take prior-”

“Enough!” Shyvana snapped. “Are you going to help create this cake or not?”

“Uhh… Let me get someone who can help us.”

 


 

“By the gods!” King Jarvan IV exclaimed. “Your house!”

Shyvana was definitely annoyed now. “Would everyone stop talking about the house!” she shouted, throwing her hands in the air. “Focus, everyone! The cake!”

“Garen, my man. This is not the ‘little project’ you told me about. We’re going to need backup if we’re going to fix this by the end of today,” Jarvan said, gawking at the scorch marks up the walls.

Fury boiled inside her. “Jarv-”

“Shyvana, it’s okay, we can bake the cake together. Let them fix the house. They would only get in the way anyway,” Lux said, trying to pull Shyvana inside.

“What about the well?” she asked, gesturing at the dried batter crusting the mixing bowl. “We need to wash the dishes first.”

“Oh yeah,” Lux said. She poked her head outside. “Boys! Hurry up and fix the well! Then you can worry about the house!”

A few grunts of confirmation, and the two burly men got to work on the well. Jarvan lifted up the splintered frame, narrowly avoiding Garen driving a nail straight through his thumb.

“Almost got me there!” he laughed.

“Heh, put it back, let me try again!”

Shyvana closed the door. She couldn’t bear to watch.

“Okay, now we need eggs, looks like most of these are broken,” Lux was saying, surveying the mess of cracked eggs around the table.

“I… do not know how you do it,” Shyvana admitted. “I tried to break the shell… But I just obliterate the puny things!”

Lux smiled. “Here, let me show you.” She took one of the few surviving eggs and gently rapped it against the wood table. It split clean down the middle.

“That’s not fair,” Shyvana pouted. “Your tiny hands are better suited for this task.”

“That’s okay!” Lux said, waving her hands. “Why don’t you check on the boys while I crack the rest of these? You can wash the dishes. I’m sure you’ll be good at mixing the ingredients!”

Shyvana grumbled to herself and creaked open the door, warped by the heat. Garen and Jarvan were nowhere in sight. The well was… fixed? She turned the crank and the bucket came right up, full of water, sure. But they definitely took some… creative liberties with the look. She hoped no one would notice the crooked frame.

While she washed the dishes and tried to ignore the growing anxiety within her, she heard the boys returning.

“Our finest work!” Garen proclaimed. He carried what looked like an entire oak tree on his shoulder. Jarvan sat atop it, arms full of grass.

“It is certainly your work,” Shyvana said. “What’s with the tree?”

“To replace the wood that burned!” Jarvan declared.

“You can’t just jam a tree into my house!” Shyvana cried, almost breaking the mixing bowl with rage.

Garen looked up at the rough bark, then at the house. “You know, Jarvan, I think she’s right.”

Jarvan nodded sagely. “A beam alone does not a tree make.”

“Uh…” Shyvana wasn’t sure what to say. “You guys don’t know how to fix my house, do you?” she asked.

“... No,” Jarvan did not look the slightest bit worried. “But I know someone who does!”

 


 

“By the g-”

“Don’t even finish!” Shyvana cut him off, walking back inside.

Xin Zhao looked at the tree, then at the house. “We are expected to finish in a few hours?”

Garen and Jarvan nodded. “We got the wood, though!” Garen said proudly.

“We need to carve it down into the same shape and then join it with the existing wood. Luckily, I brought tools from the palace.” Xin Zhao dumped the sack on the ground, clanging with metal and wood.

“Great! Let’s get to work!”

Shyvana was covered in batter. Lux stifled a laugh with the back of her hand. “I think… you were a little too enthusiastic, Shyvana,” she said.

“This bowl is too tiny!” she sighed, wiping her face off with a towel. Chopping and scraping sounds rang out from outside. Shyvana turned to look, but Lux stopped her.

“Let’s focus on the important part, right?” she said. Shyvana nodded. “How about you get the oven going? You’re good with fire.”

They both looked over at the scorched half of the house. Lux turned bright red. “N-Not like that…”

Shyvana stacked wood in the oven, not uttering another word.

An hour passed, a new pan filled with batter baked in the oven. Lux and Shyvana worked to clean up the mess in the kitchen.

“All together now!”

The end of a wooden beam crashed through the thatch in the ceiling. Dry grass rained down from above. Lux covered her head and shrunk away.

“Shit! We missed!”

Shyvana burst out the front door. “What the-”

Garen, Jarvan, and Xin Zhao looked over sheepishly. They were all covered in sawdust and bits of wood, and held the end of a massive length of wood. A massive length of wood currently puncturing what little of the roof remained intact.

“It’s okay! We can try again!”

“No!”

Both Jarvan and Xin Zhao let go, the beam slammed down on Garen’s foot. He screeched and hopped around, clutching the top of his foot.

“We need a crane,” Xin Zhao said.

“No, we need someone bigger ,” Jarvan said, driving his fist into his palm.

Xin Zhao looked over, eyes narrowing. “What could you possibly mean?”

Shyvana went back inside. She couldn’t bear to watch. And a delicious smell was starting to emanate from the oven.

 


 

Footsteps boomed, the ground shook. Lux looked over at Shyvana, eyes wide. “They didn’t…”

“Haha! Good start, lads. Can I crush the rest of it? Please say yes!”

A hulking behemoth of petricite, might, and magic stomped through the forest, head mingling with the birds in the trees.

“We’re so glad to have you!” Garen shouted up at the living statue.

“What was that? You’re so quiet!” Galio crouched down, almost obliterating a petricite tree in the process.

“No crush!” Xin Zhao pleaded, looking over at Shyvana peeking out the front door, fear in his eyes.

“Right, no crush.” Galio’s voice almost shook the ground, birds and small mammals fled the sound.

“We need you to put this wood into that hole!” Jarvan shouted. Garen and Xin Zhao snickered, he turned and smiled wide at both of them. He knew what he said.

“This little toothpick? Count me in !” Galio said with a rumbling laugh. He bent over, and with two fingers, picked up the beam. Garen balanced atop it, directing him to the space in the roof. Jarvan and Xin Zhao hacked at the existing beam, dropping it into the house. Lux dutifully helped Shyvana drag the debris outside. The sun was getting dangerously low. They didn’t have much time.

“Who’s going to ice the cake?” Lux asked, as they dragged old thatch away from the house.

“Ice…” Shyvana blinked. “But we are baking it.”

“I mean, decorate it,” Lux said, with the patience of a saint.

“Oh. Certainly not me…” she trailed off, looking hopefully at Lux.

Lux shook her head. “ Definitely not me. I’d mess it up, too.”

“Then who?”

“Someone with taste. Grace. Sona is in Ionia. Which leaves…”

 


 

“By th-”

“No.”

They arrived back at the house. The boys were doing a surprisingly remarkable job. Garen and Galio already had half the roof back in order, and Xin Zhao and Jarvan were almost done with the rafters.

“That cake smells great!” Shyvana said, waiting for Lux and their newest recruit to hop off her back before transforming back.

“Is something… burning?” Fiora asked, sniffing the air.

“The cake!” Lux charged into the house, wrenching open the oven door. “Where are the oven mitts!”

Shyvana pushed her aside. “A couple miles south!” she said, crouching down and reaching into the oven with her bare hands. She pulled the pan out of the oven. It wasn’t nearly as charred as her first attempt, but it was certainly overdone. The top was supposed to be golden brown, and it leaned hard in the direction of brown.

“Gods damn it…” Shyvana muttered. “We burned it again!”

“It is not… too bad…” Fiora said, looking over Shyvana’s shoulder.

“We don’t have time to make another,” Shyvana said, eyes cast downward.

Lux put her hand on Shyvana’s shoulder. “I’m sure it will still taste good in the middle. Let’s ice it anyway. A little overdone is better than nothing!”

Shyvana nodded, and Lux mixed up the icing while Fiora examined the cake. “This will be my finest work,” she said confidently, grabbing hold of the knife.

“I’ll leave it to you then,” Shyvana said, walking outside to help finish the roof.

Ten minutes later, the roof was done, and the sun painted the sky with purples and reds.

“Fiora!” Garen said, moving to clap her on the shoulder.

“Do not touch me, oaf!” she hissed, whipping the knife around. A bit of icing slapped against the wall. Lux scrubbed it off with a cloth. “I am working!”

Shyvana looked over her shoulder. White icing covered the top of the deep brown cake. Lux had mixed some blueberries with the white icing to make it a purplish-blue color. A crude stick-figure drawing of an Azurite eagle graced the top of the cake, Fiora worked to fill in the outline.

“It’s… lovely,” Shyvana said, smiling wide.

“Let me see!” Galio shouted from above.

 


 

Garen and Jarvan dragged the table outside while Xin Zhao lit a campfire. Galio helped Fiora string some candles in jars between the trees while Lux quickly cooked up some venison steaks Shyvana hunted. Xin Zhao ordered a barrel of beer to be brought in from the palace, and Galio went to fetch it.

An eagle screeched overhead, and everyone gathered around the table, next to the pleasant warmth of the fire.

A figure dressed in blue and silver armor walked up the path. Quinn took off her helmet and looked around at everyone in surprise.

“I didn’t expect you all to be here!” she laughed, setting her helmet on the table. Valor landed on his perch near the house, looking skeptically at the new roof.

“We baked you a cake!” Lux said, gesturing toward the table.

Quinn looked over, smiling wide. “It looks delicious! Thank you all so much!”

“Shyvana was responsible for everything,” Garen said, putting his arm around Shyvana’s shoulder and giving her a shake.

“You did all this?” Quinn asked, looking over at her.

“The cake is a little burned. And the house…” Shyvana began.

Quinn rushed over and threw her arms around her, hugging her close. “Thank you so much!” She gave her a peck on the lips.

“Happy birthday, Quinn,” Shyvana said, face turning a deeper shade of purple.

Fiora expertly cut the cake, Jarvan tapped the keg, and Galio crouched down to join the festivities. Quinn and Shyvana returned to their friends.

Notes:

A cute little story I cooked up for fun. If I missed any obvious tags, let me know. I'm not good at tagging fluff lol.

I hope you enjoyed, constructive criticism always welcome!