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If Fischl had a Sommernachtgarten, a domain, of her own, she knew it would take the form of a library. Whenever the smell of old pages and ink met her nose, the anxiety in her heart subsided. The library had been her companion even before taking Oz as her familiar. It supported her when she wept and remained by her side when she was alone. To her, it was home.
After arriving back from her trip to the Golden Apple Archipelago, she couldn’t help but feel a spring in her step. While she didn’t want to face her mirage at first, she left feeling anew. That day, she truly became the Prinzessin der Verurteilung. It made her want nothing more than to rush to her beloved library to read once more the book that started it all, to reminisce on how far she had come. So the first chance she received, she sent Oz on an errand and hurried to the home of her heart.
It didn’t take long to find it within the library. She knew the places of her favorite books by heart. With its deep violet spine and black adornments, it stood out amongst the other books on the shelf. So with joy in her heart, she made her way to its side only for it to be suddenly plucked out by another hand.
“Hey!”
You jumped as the sound of her voice caught you by surprise. But when you turned to see her, then her outfit, your expression went blank. Fischl felt her chest tighten ever so slightly. It wasn’t rare for her outfit to catch the eyes of others. Many found it strange and over the top, and she was positive your eyes would be soon telling her that too. Never did she expect a shy smile to find its way to your lips instead.
“Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to stare. I’ve just never seen such an amazing replica of Fischl von Luftschloss Narfidort’s Dunkelnacht Sakrament before. Your outfit is phenomenal! Did you make it yourself? Did you use pictures or did you just go off of the descriptions in the book? I have to know!”
“Uh… I…”
As if finally catching yourself, you took a step back nervously with your arms up.
“Sorry, am I making you uncomfortable? Flowers for Princess Fischl is my favorite book series. I’m a bit of a hardcore fan as you can see…” You began with an embarrassed smile.
“No… I… I just… never met anyone who recognized my outfit before. I really like Flowers for Princess Fischl too.”
The voice that left her sounded different than usual. It was soft and hesitant, as if just peeking out into the world for the first time. But you didn’t notice. Instead, you perked up and hopped close.
“Really? Are there not many fans in Mondstadt? It’s an amazing series. It really deserves more fans, don’t you agree? What is your favorite part? My favorite scene is in the third volume when…”
As fast as her heart beat in her chest, her brain was blank. Could anyone blame her? She was so used to hearing unkind whispers and seeing judgmental eyes. Never once had someone shown such an excited interest in something she liked. Never once had she been so quickly praised by someone who knew nothing about her.
Her reverie was broken when you gave a sheepish laugh.
“I am weirding you out, aren’t I? Here, you wanted to read this, didn’t you? I’m sorry, I’ll leave you alone now,” you let out apologetically as you handed her the novel.
Her breath caught in her throat. Were you going to leave? Did she completely ruin it with the first person who could possibly understand her? No, she didn’t want that!
“No, don’t leave! I… I’m sorry.”
Her gaze glued itself to her feet. How pathetic. How quickly she was brought from her high back down to reality. She would never be more than–
“Would you like to chat about Princess Fischl together then? If you’re free, of course. I’d love to hear your favorite parts!”
You smiled a kind smile as your warm eyes crinkled at the corners. As if the sun just came out on a dreary day, the creeping darkness faded from her heart, and in its place, something small started to bloom. She gave a shy smile.
“Um… sure, I’d love to.”
You grinned in return. Before you could turn to a table to sit at, you gasped as a thought suddenly popped into your mind.
“By the way, my name is First. What’s your name?”
The answer she gave left her lips before it even took form in her mind.
“Amy.”
She learned much about you that day. You were not a citizen but a visitor to Mondstadt. You came with your father from Fontaine to learn more about the windmills that sat on the edges of the city. You mentioned with a wink that you already had a new invention brewing in your mind. Once you nailed down the specifics, you would tell her all about it. She would be lying that grin of yours didn’t make her heart stutter.
You talked so naturally with her that it was as if you had known her for years. You cracked jokes and laughed with ease. Without even realizing, she found herself getting carried along by the melody of your tune. For the first time as… as Amy, she was happy.
But in the recesses of her heart, guilt pulled at her veins. Didn’t she just become Fischl von Luftschloss Narfidort? Wasn’t her speech in the glorious Immernachtreich her declaration that she accepted who she truly was? She reclaimed her heart, didn’t she?
So why was she so quick to throw it away?
But that smile of yours and the warmth of your eyes chased away the negative thoughts from seizing hold. You made her feel it was okay that the quiet awkward Amy that everyone whispered about existed. Even though people called her weird and her interests embarrassing, she could still be Amy and nothing was strange about it.
So caught by your flow she was that one of the days she met you in the library, she brought her writings along with her. Never had she shown them to anyone before, but somehow she knew you wouldn’t let her down.
“I honestly feel like I’m reading Mr. Nine’s next installment in the series!” You exclaimed with a grin. “You write Fischl and Ozvaldo so naturally.”
She played with the straps of fabric that hung from her sleeve shyly.
“You really think so? I wasn’t sure about that part…”
You laughed.
“I don’t say things I don’t mean, Amy! Would you mind if I took this with me tonight? I don’t think I’ll be able to finish it all here.”
She could barely stop herself from reeling back.
“Do you really like it that much?”
You rolled your eyes before glowering at her.
“Didn’t I just say that I don’t say things I don’t mean? Don’t doubt me. I really like this, Amy. In fact, if you’ve ever written anything else, I’d probably ask you to let me read them too!”
She felt her cheeks flush at your honest declaration. Really, she didn’t think her writings were that great…
“Have you?”
Her brow scrunched at your question.
“Have you ever written anything else?”
She flinched before waving her hands wildly in front of her.
“No, of course not! I don’t know what I’d even write about!”
Your shoulders dropped at her frantic confession.
“Well, I am telling you now that you should try. You have a wonderful writing style. You know Yae Publishing House in Inazuma often has light novel competitions. If you ever write one, you should send it in! But…” Your lips pulled back into a playful grin as you nudged arm her softly. “You’ll have to let me read it first. Promise me, okay?”
She sighed.
“Fine, I promise.”
Things seemed to be going too well for her. Out of all her friends, the person she showed the face of Amy to the most was Mona. But even the dear astrologist didn’t know Amy as well as you did. But that’s all you knew. You never met Fischl and she hoped the day would never come in which you would.
It was at times like this that she was thankful your work in Mondstadt kept you busy. When you weren’t in the library, you were off with your father studying the windmills. When night came, you went straight back to the inn to sleep your exhaustion away.
So when you ran into her in front of the Adventurers’ Guild, it was safe to say that her heart stopped. She would have been fine had she been alone, but Bennett was at her side.
She saw you before you saw her, but she didn’t have the chance to run before your eyes met hers. Immediately you broke into a wide smile and you waved to her, but she couldn’t mirror your excitement. Even though she saw your lips move to the motion of her hidden name, she couldn’t hear a sound. It wasn’t long before your expression shifted to one of worry. As you took steps toward her, her urge to flee only grew.
“Fischl… Fischl? Someone’s trying to talk to you. They’re calling you Amy for some reason.”
By this point, you were only a few yards away. Much to her despair, confusion flashed across your face.
“Well, of course. That’s her name, isn’t it?”
Bennett frowned.
“No, it’s Fischl. That’s what we’ve always called her.”
You took a step back hesitantly. And for the first time, you looked at her as if you didn’t know who she was. You looked at her as if–
She turned away.
She didn’t want to see more.
“My loyal servant, I shall bid you adieu. The echoing of the clock within mine Sommernachtgarten calleth me. Vagrant of Fontaine, thy time spent in my presence was indeed of a blessed partaking. Though our fates may not be twined with silver thread, I will always thank thee with the multitudes of gratitude within my heart. Good…”
Her voice cracked and suddenly she could not do it anymore.
She ran.
“Goodbye.”
She didn’t visit the library after that. Far from it, she ran. She knew your stay in Mondstadt was limited to a month, so she took commission after commission, quest after quest. The farther she was from Mondstadt, the farther she was from you, the better. Even as Oz pleaded with her to open her heart to him, she kept quiet.
Shame dragged her soul into the depths of self-hatred. What would Oz think of her if he found out she abandoned her title of Prinzessin so easily? And to tell you her real name as if she was ashamed of being Fischl. Was she implying she was rejecting him too? After all, she’d always send him on errands before coming to meet you. Was that a sign she was ashamed of him as well?
She wished nothing more than to go home, to her beloved library. Getting lost in books never failed to chase away her stresses and fears, but she knew you would be waiting there if she returned. Every time she stopped at the Adventurers’ Guild, Katheryne mentioned you asked for her yet again. But she memorized your schedule. Until you left, she knew which areas to avoid.
So when she arrived at the gates of Mondstadt early in the morning and saw you, her heart immediately stopped. There was a heavy bag upon your back and your comfortable shoes were switched out for traveling boots. She wanted to laugh. It was just her luck to run into you the day you left. But if she backed away quietly enough, perhaps you would not notice–
“Mein Fräulein? Are you alright?”
Your eyes met hers and for that moment, you both simply stared at each other in shock. Fortunately for her, experience reigned her in faster. Before you could speak, she turned and ran. It wasn’t long before she heard the sound of your boots behind her.
“Wait! Please!!”
Though out of breath, your voice was tight with distress. You sounded like you were hurt, but why? Shouldn’t you be mad with her? And why were you so desperately chasing after her? Weren’t you supposed to be embarrassed for choosing to keep a loser like her company for so long? But before she could come to conclusions on her own, a voice broke through her thoughts.
“Please forgive your loyal familiar for what he must do.”
Flying before her, he spread his wings to block her from continuing.
“Oz!? Just what are you–”
“You need to face your fears before it is too late, mein Fräulein.”
The sound of your heavy footsteps slowly came closer. You were moving much slower than when she first started to run. But with your heavy breathing and gasps for air, it was easy to tell why. She wished nothing more than to turn to see if you were alright, but her feet were frozen in place. She couldn’t focus on anything but the odd blur of her vision and the hiccuping that matched the rhythm of the breath stuttering in her chest.
So when something touched her wrist, she flinched almost violently. She heard a soft murmur of apology before she felt it turn her hand around gently and slip something inside. It was thin and soft. A piece of paper? Lifting it up, it was only after she tried and failed to read it that she decided to wipe at her eyes instead. Perhaps had she been paying more attention, she would have noticed that her hand came back wet, but the paper was more important.
“A-An address?”
The thickness of her voice and the sniffles that seemed to want to interrupt her at every turn caught her by surprise. Was she crying?
“It’s my address for when you send me your first manuscript, you know?”
Her brain short-circuited. You weren’t going to– What in the world were you talking about?
“Yeah, you know. For your first story. You promised me I’d be the first to read it. But I wouldn’t mind some letters too, you know.”
She was confused. Something wasn’t right here. Why were you acting like she didn’t do anything wrong, like she didn’t lie to you and avoid you… like she would have been happiest had she never seen you again?
“I came up with a good story idea if you want to hear it.”
There was a playfulness to your voice. It was the tone that never failed to goad her into asking more. You knew she couldn’t help but give in and play along.
“O-Oh? And what is that?”
Her voice came out rough as she wiped her eyes. With all the despair she was feeling and wanted to feel, of course you had to pull her right out of it to match your tune instead.
“I was thinking it could be about a girl, one that isn’t necessarily brave or outspoken like Princess Fischl. Instead, I imagine she’d be soft and quiet. She probably was hurt in the past, so I don’t think she’d have a high self-esteem either.”
She scoffed in between her slowly weakening sobs.
“Who would want to read anything about a girl like that?”
“Well that’s the thing!”
She could hear the smile in your voice.
“That’d only be the way she sees herself. What I think would be great for your story is to have her come to realize just how amazing of a person she is. Like how she’s sweet and imaginative. How she cares so much about the people around her. How adorable her smile is… Oh! Also how she can read a book and instantly find the most profound things in it! I think that’s a very important part to add in. Honestly, I think a girl like her would be just my type!”
She broke into a startled laugh.
“I think you have strange tastes.”
The darkness of her heart begged to refuse your words. It would be much easier to hide where no light could be seen. But somehow she couldn’t. Your kindness bloomed something beautiful within her chest. Though small, it couldn’t help but hope, no, believe your words could be true.
“I have a name for her too, you know.”
You were closer this time. Right behind her. When you took her hand, she finally looked at you. Some place inside her felt she should have felt surprised, but you weren’t changed. Your eyes still brimmed with the warmth of the sun.
“And what is that?”
Then you smiled, that lovely smile of yours.
“Amy.”