Chapter Text
Phoenix had expected feeling many things during his last meal but never the crushing loneliness of it all.
In this entirely too white room with no windows and a blinding ceiling light bulb hanging from a single wire Phoenix found himself just as pitiful as this room. Thankfully the simplicity of his diner brought him a sense of comfort, a taste of childhood, of the innocence he had long lost. But Phoenix did not linger on his memories, as it would soon all be over. Tomorrow at 10am he would close his eyes one final time; what was the point of still clinging to life? Long ago had he agreed with himself that the best way he could spend his last hours were in complete numbness.
As he stood in that blinding room, plate empty, the ex-attorney wondered why had the judge accepted his plea. Phoenix knew it was a first in history, to shorten a death sentence by so much time. He also asked himself why had Miles not tried to convinced the judge to reconsider his decision. A few days ago, when Edgeworth came into the parlor with the two Fey cousins, he seemed so distressed. And the ex-attorney could swear that he had noticed a bit of moisture rise to Miles’ eyes when Phoenix affirmed that this sentence was still what he wanted. But he thanked Gumshoe and Maggey for taking Pearl outside before he could admit this.
Once he had enough of waiting, Phoenix got up, soon handcuffed back by some guards and accompanied to his cell one final time. Through the lone window, he could see the rising moon, the last he would ever see. It was full, round and bright in the cloudy sky. Something told him it would snow soon. Without another thought, he climbed into his bed and looked at the ceiling with an empty stare. A faint smell made his head turn to the side where the small branch of dried lavender was stuck between two planks of wood. A picture of his best friend flashed through his mind, and Phoenix wondered how was Miles. Surely, he was still awake, eating his diner with Gumshoe and Maggey. Deep down, the ex-attorney hoped he would not cross their minds a single time, they did not deserve to feel any pain because of him. The sooner the world forgot about him, the better.
At least it was what he vainly wished.
On his wrist rested a red leather bracelet, one he had never removed since Christmas. Phoenix wished he was never gifted such a wonderful present. It was too beautiful for his twisted hands, its maker was too pure for the tainted receiver of his work. Yet, just like the corrupt shellfish murderer he was, Phoenix promised himself this bracelet would be the last thing he would ever see. Yes, he would die just like he lived during these past 37 days: holding on to the memory of a friendship he knew he would never see bloom into what he had always wished.
Slowly, Phoenix raised the bracelet to his lips and slowly pressed them against it. Only recently had he realized that he had always felt something else for his friend; a different kind of affection, intimate and passionate like the warmth of the most tender embrace. For all this time, Phoenix had loved Miles Edgeworth with all his heart. But the fool had only realized the extent of his feelings not long before his final hour.
Vainly seeking the last bit of comfort he would ever feel, Phoenix reached for his pocket where something was digging into his leg, a green coma-shaped stone. He used to wonder how he was allowed to carry the magatama around in the prison, but the answer did not matter anymore. Perhaps he should have asked to send it back to Kurain where Maya would have put it to better use. At least, if the blood on his hands had not tainted its powers. The ex-attorney closed his eyes for a moment, thinking about Maya and her cousin, he wished they would not mourn him as well. These two deserved nothing but to live a happy and healthy life, that fortune would smile upon them and maybe that Maya would finally find that special someone Pearl keeps seeing in Phoenix. He kept his eyes closed as the image of a praying Maya and Pearl strangely stuck into his mind.
A faint warmth suddenly grew in the palm of his hand. When Phoenix opened his eyes, they were illuminated by a green light. The shine kept on getting stronger and stronger until he was completely blinded. For an instant, all the senses of the ex-attorney died down as if he had finally met his end, yet a cold sensation washed all over his body and a cold wind started blowing on his nose. Something was wrong. Phoenix reasoned that he may have already died and his form of personal hell was an incomprehensible mess. But when he felt a single snowflake fall on his cheek and turn to water, he understood that it was not the case.
When he finally dared opening his eyes, Phoenix could feel the vastness of the sky above; the stars were shining so bright even between the branches of the trees. In his hand, he felt warm shards of stone, giving out their last mysterious green hue before going completely dark. Things were happening too fast for his foggy brain, and the ex-attorney had to stand still for a few long minutes in order to fully come back to his senses. Already thick snow started falling from the sky when he stopped staring at it. The biting cold threatened Phoenix’s already low pulse to stop.
Somehow, from the depth of his brain, survival instincts awakened.
The ex-attorney got up and looked around himself. He did not know this blood curling forest. Around him were only thick tree trunks, fallen branches, rocks and the falling snow. Yet, almost invisible, a dull light shined through the trees. Instinctively moving forward and focusing in the odd shape in the distant horizon, Phoenix recognized the shape of a house. But he stopped in his tracks. why would he seek refuge? He was a prison escapee, all he would get is sent back to his cell, get punished for his escape with more time before his release from the chains of life. No, it would be quicker and far less painful to die from the cold in this unknown forest; he deserved nothing more.
Phoenix sat down, arms locking his knees close to his chest and watched the small light in the distance. He thought of who could live there: a couple with children, two lovers or a lone soul. He too would die as a lonely soul, one tainted with madness and blood. How pathetic, the ex-attorney thought as he felt his uniform becoming soaked from the melting snow on his shoulders. Just as he thought about closing his eyes and slowly letting the cold take him, he pictured the distant house one last time and felt its shape looked oddly familiar. The fact that it stood on a hill, the trees, the garden…
His legs moved on their own as he started running towards the house he suddenly remembered belonged to his best friend. As he slowly closed-in the seemingly infinite gap between him and his friend, Phoenix almost tripped over many branches or stone, but not once did he ever stop. A deafening voice in his head screamed to see Miles one last time, it begged Phoenix to give himself to that prosecutor, that only him could make the right choice when it came to his fate. After all, was he not justice incarnate? Loving towards the innocent and strict before those who dared defy him. As the ex-attorney got closer to the property, he recognized the red bricks and white painted wood of the windows, the smoking chimney and the garden he had only seen in the dead of winter but looked like the most magnificent of them all. After climbing up the stone steps leading to the courtyard, Phoenix finally arrived at the porch, its tiny roof shielding him from the cold already. Catching his breath, Phoenix readied his hand above the door.
Knock knock
A minute passed without a sound, without a single gust of wind freezing the tips of his fingers further. Phoenix wondered if after all he had not really been sent to his hell, doomed to forever wait in front of this door. No, maybe Miles was sleeping and had forgotten to turn a lamp off. With clenched fists of regret, Phoenix turned around and started leaving the once impeccable porch now covered in the mud from the soles of his cheap prison shoes.
But he froze when the sound of a lock reached his ears, turning around he was met with the sweet forms of a familiar face, eyes wide with shock. Edgeworth’s glasses were a little off on his nose and his messy hair only suggested that he was not expecting to see anyone so late into the night, yet his relaxed clothes did not indicate the prosecutor was sleeping. His mouth opened and closed a few times, seemingly not finding the words to express himself. Instead, Miles grabbed Phoenix’s arm and pulled him inside.
The house was just as warm as he remembered: the smell of dried lavender and burning wood floating in the air in a comforting perfume. When arms wrapped around him, Phoenix’s muscles completely relaxed, his eyes closing at the same occasion. The contact was warm, warm enough to slowly unfreeze Phoenix’s emotions. Trapped between those two arms, the escapee felt himself live again, he had missed them so much.
He has missed Miles too much.
"You're freezing." Edgeworth simply commented, unaware of just how much his precious action already helped.
Phoenix did not know what to answer and settled with lingering in the arms of his friend, feeling his heart clench when he let go.
Miles guided him to the fireplace. Of course, heat radiated from the hearth but the comfort it brought was nothing compared to his arms. The ex-attorney stood alone in front of the fire for a minute before Edgeworth came back with a tea and a warm blanket. He put the porcelain cup onto the coffee table but kept the blanket in his hands, peering down at Phoenix.
“You’re soaked… aren’t you cold in these clothes?” Edgeworth asked.
“I’m warmer now... I’ll be fine.” the ex-attorney answered.
“Nonsense, you’ll catch a cold. Take off your clothes, I’ll get you warmer ones.”
Miles dropped the quilt onto Phoenix’s shoulders before running away to his room, a hint of red on his cheeks. The fabric was woolly and soft, it even smelled just like its owner and would have lulled the runaway prisoner into a deep sleep had Edgeworth not pulled him out of it to ask him again to go change clothes in the bathroom. As he escorted him there, a thought came up to him. Why was Miles helping him? Why was he being so kind to him without even a sign of doubt?
Once they reached the door of the bathroom, Miles stopped.
“I suggest you take a shower to warm up. Don't go in all at once. Take it slow and please, don't hurt yourself."
The worry in his eyes was disarming, and an urgent need to reform the embrace they shared a few moments ago surfaced back into Phoenix’s mind. But the prosecutor was right, he should take care to warm himself first. Before that, however, he revealed the broken magatama to him and asked if he had anything he could put the shards in. Miles came back a few seconds later with a clean handkerchief and put them in it, looking strangely troubled. But Phoenix did not have the time to ask about it and was hurried inside the bathroom.
Now the ex-attorney was left all alone with his thoughts, and much like last time he was trapped in this bathroom, they drastically raised in numbers. One told him he should flee and return to die in the cold, the other begged to follow Miles's orders and a last one wished the prosecutor had decided to accompany him under the warm water, preferably naked. But Phoenix shut them all down, except for the second one, and stripped out of his soggy orange clothes.
The water flowed from the shower head like a light rain and smoothly rolled on his skin. Steam formed around him and the smell of Miles's shampoo filled his nostrils as he poured some onto his hair. Suddenly the clarity he had tried erasing from his brain a few hours ago came cashing back down on him. What had just happened? Why was he out of jail? How dared he try to escape his fate? No, he didn’t try to escape, it was a trick of said fate, still toying with him like a soulless puppet. He did not deserve this shower nor the everlasting kindness of Miles. What he truly deserved was to die like the scum he was.
"Wright? Do not boil yourself in there, please." Edgeworth's voice pierced through the ones pestering Phoenix's mind.
The ex-attorney immediately cut the water and reached for a towel. As he dried himself, he felt a cruel grasp on his throat and his eyes lighting stinging. Now that he was here, what would become of him? The softness of Miles’s voice as it echoed in his head only lead him to conclude that his friend had no intention of sending him back to jail. But this felt wrong, not doing so would make the prosecutor a criminal. The grip on his throat somehow tightened as he realized that Miles already was, he should have immediately called police, not helped him.
As the thought spined into Phoenix’s head he heard the door open and a shy hand place a set of new clothes on the edge of the sink. It really seemed that Edgeworth wanted to help him escape. The clothes were definitely warm, thick hiking pants, turtleneck and a wooly sweater. The fabric of each item felt soft and fancier than anything he could have dreamed of owning. It looked his friend did not hold back this time. Once dressed, he opened the door to the hallway to reveal his best friend, impatiently waiting for him. His eyes traced up and down Phoenix’s body with great attention.
“Is anything too big or too small? If that is the case, please tell me, I can lend you something else.” Miles asked with a careful concern.
“No, it’s perfect… thank you.” Phoenix answered, suddenly feeling like he had never thanked his friend enough.
He felt like he had been ungrateful since they had reunited. Who knew just how much Miles had suffered because of him this past month? Phoenix clenched his hands as he wondered the same for Maya and Pearl. He was awful was he not? Even after he had finally fallen out of his murderous frenzy, he could not stop hurting people. And yet it seemed that Edgeworth was forgiving him, as all the kindness he had showed lead him to believe.
“Why…” he started. “Why are you helping me? Why aren’t you sending me back to jail?”
"How could I?" Miles answered, grabbing his elbow in a familiar anxious gesture. "You never deserved this. I was a fool to listen to you the first time. I will not repeat this mistake."
Conflict raged inside of Phoenix's head; an old tyrannic yearning for the prosecutor to send him to death and a newborn will to live, shy as could be but warm. It was born from Edgeworth’s hands, caring and oh so soft; how could anything coming from them be impure?
"You do realize what you are doing, right?" Phoenix asked.
"I know. But I cannot bring myself to send you to your death a second time. You know I yearn for the truth, and it appears to be that I believe you do not deserve this fate. Even if it is cruel, I want you to flee.” Edgeworth paused, his eyes leaving the side and looking right at Phoenix. “Wright, I want you to live.”
Hearing it directly from Miles felt like a liberation. If he believed that Phoenix deserved a second chance then the ex-attorney would take it. After everything that Edgeworth had done for him, he owed him that much and maybe even more.
“Do you trust me?” Miles asked with a soft voice but serious tone.
Phoenix nodded. But he startled when he felt the arms of his friend once again embrace him, whispering “thank you” in his ears a few dozen times. The ex-attorney could never have enough of it, the comfort, the care, and dared he say the love? No, surely his dulled heart was being foolish. Either way he could not bring himself to break the embrace first, wishing it could last forever.
When a hand softly landed on the back of his head, fingers intertwining with his hair, Phoenix thought he might just die on the spot. He adored the way that hand spread warmth into his brain, mellowing it out like some kind of drug he could easily get addicted to.
“We have to cut your hair.” Miles suddenly announced, freezing his dearest friend on the spot.
Of course, Phoenix felt perplexed at first. He loved his hair, fully aware that it was the most striking thing about his otherwise banal appearance. At least if you excluded his eyes. But he fully understood why Miles wanted to make them disappear. It was for his safety, to maximize his chances of survival to get out of a country that wanted him dead. Phoenix would bear it. He had already lost so much that the idea of completely starting over did not feel so extreme.
“Let’s go, before I change my mind.” The ex-attorney said, a hint of playfulness hiding his remorse.
The two men walked back into the bathroom, the moisture and warmth from the shower still lingering in the air. Phoenix waited by the edge of the bathtub as Edgeworth gathered a chair, a sheet to cover the floor and his hair clippers. When Phoenix sat down, a towel was put on his shoulders and Miles ran his hand through the spiky locks before him. A shiver ran down the ex-attorney’s spine, the feeling sent like a thousand ants crawling in his entire body along with the chill icy. Surely it was because of the anticipation.
“Are you ready?” Miles asked, removing his hand.
A nod was all it took for the buzzing of the clippers to start resonating against his skull, and Phoenix had to close his eyes to bare the sensation. He dreaded opening them up, he knew he would not recognize himself in the mirror when he would do so, if he does not, then his chances of survival would be compromised. But he trusted his friend, he knew that he would not fail. Miles had put so much at risk because of him; his career, his reputation. These two were everything to him, and he bet them all away just for his childhood friend. Phoenix could not find a reason to justify this.
It was what felt like hours later that the clippers finally stopped, Edgeworth blew some stray hairs off of Phoenix’s head and finished it off by dusting it with his hand. The contact surprised the ex-attorney, the sound it made was completely new and hypnotizing. Each short strand of hair brushing against Miles’s hand made Phoenix feel like he was getting swallowed by a wave or like submerged into water. The best part of it all was that it overpowered the noise of his countless thoughts trying to drive him mad.
“Do that again.” He asked.
After a second of hesitation, Edgeworth complied and even more slowly dragged his hand along the curve of Phoenix’s freshly shaven skull. The sensation could have lured him to sleep if he was not actively fighting against it, especially considering the time of day. The snow muffled any sort of sound in the already still winter night making the two men feel like they were alone in this world.
“Does this feel good?” Miles asked, not stopping his hands.
“You have no idea…” Phoenix answered with a small pleased smile.
A second hand then joined the first one, enhancing the noise until Phoenix started feeling dizzy and very much sleepy. He even had to ask his friend to stop or else he believed he might have lost his fight against sleep. But now that this little moment of peace was over, the ex-attorney had no choice but to face his new self and get up from the chair. Opening his eyes was a hard task but getting up was even more. Yet he still managed to overcome these two challenges.
Miles had given him a buzzcut. It was the simplest and quickest way to change someone’s appearance through a haircut, perhaps it was even too efficient. Only his eyebrows and mismatched eyes were left of who Phoenix Wright used to be. In a way, it reassured him as he would be much harder to recognize him
In another, he already mourned the loss of his old self.
“You look… different.” Miles commented with a hint of regret.
“It’s all thanks to you. You did a great job.” Phoenix answered, turning to him and looking at his sweet face.
The prosecutor did do the same and shied away, eyes lost on the ground and hand grabbing his elbow again.
“You don’t like it?” the ex-attorney asked.
“It’s not you anymore… I know that is why we did this, but I know I’ll miss your stupid spikes too much.”
The small smile on Phoenix’s face turned to a endeared grin. He too, will miss them, but it was a necessary evil for a uncertain good.
“I’ll miss them too… but now they gotta disappear.”
A few minutes of cleaning later, the two men had moved back to the living room, a cup of now cold tea each in hand and sitting in front of the fireplace. Little by little, Miles poured the bits of hair into the fire. The smell was terrible but inescapable if they wanted Miles to avoid jail. It felt weird to think that the righteous prosecutor he knew so well was committing a crime, and all because of him. It seemed that he really did end up tainting him as he feared. As Phoenix felt his a growing disgust in his stomach, he drank a sip of his tea. Even cold, it was delicious and soothing, just like the one who brewed it. The way Edgeworth’s glasses reflected the flames of the fireplace and sat so elegantly on his nose was something to behold, even if it was so simple.
“I prepared you a backpack with some necessities and some money while you were showering. I’m not sure if there is any other way I can help you… I wish I could do more.” Edgeworth said, pouring the last shovelful of hair to burn.
“You’re already doing more than I could ever ask for.” Phoenix answered, watching the raven strands crumple up and fade into dust.
“It’s the minimum I owe you… If I listened to myself I would leave everything behind and run away with you.”
A bit of heat rose to Phoenix’s cheeks as he heard the confession. In a sense it was flattering that the prosecutor felt this way, but there was no way the ex-attorney would let him fall with so low. Miles had to stay, or else he feared the juridical system might just fall apart.
“You have to stay. Gumshoe and Maggey need you, Maya and Pearl need you too. And I know a lot more do too.” Phoenix looked at his friend with a sad smile.
Miles’ gaze was lost in the flames as his eyes reflected just how perplexed he felt. It all urged Phoenix to run away as soon as he could in case his friend changed his mind and forcefully started following him. Phoenix knew that he would never be able to push him away if that were to happen. The ex-attorney would admit that it would almost be a dream come true to have Miles forever by his side but the prosecutor belonged in his country, taking him away would was inconcevable.
“Where will you even go?” Edgeworth suddenly turned to look at Phoenix.
“I’m not even sure… maybe I’ll cross the border… find a way to Japan…”
Reading that book back at the prison library did make a lot of memories surface, Phoenix wondered if his grandmother was alive and well. Maybe he could say hello to her and stay for a while… or more.
“I know it may sound obvious but… you do know this will not be easy, right? Illegally crossing the border, or even getting false ID. You’ll only have one chance…” Miles added, worry on his face.
“Hey, you put me on this path! Why are you trying to make me change my mind?” Phoenix answered with a playful tone which soon faded. “I’ll have to try. I think… I don’t want to leave this world so soon. You gave me a reason to stay.”
Miles looked away as an answer, a hint of sadness in the way his lips fell downwards. He then got up, hand reaching for his arm and grabbing it tightly.
“I wish we didn’t have to separate. I’m worried about you, about what could happen to you. I don’t want this to become the last time we see each other.”
“It will not.” Phoenix immediately answered, getting to his feet too.
“How can you be so sure of it?”
Phoenix suddenly turned to his friend and took a confident step further.
“I can at least try, just like a few years ago when you were accused of murder. The odds were against us, but we made it out and I kept my promise to save you. Believe me when I say we’ll meet again.”
Just as Phoenix hopped, Miles eventually sighed in acceptance, but all the worry in the world was still obvious painted on his face. Who could blame him? Just as a tensed silence started settling between the two, the large clock in the living room rang 4am, which completely took Phoenix off guard as he remember taking his last meal during the mandatory diner time and not before. Yet most importantly it meant that he should be leaving soon as every second got them closer to sunrise and the guards realizing that he was missing from his cell. He quickly grabbed the backpack on the table, put on a warm coat, gloves and scarf Miles gave to him. The two men walked out to the porch with heavy hearts.
“Wright, wait.”
Edgeworth suddenly grabbed Phoenix back into the house before pulling him into a final heartfelt hug. Slowly, the ex-attorney wrapped both his arms tightly around Miles’ back. The wind and the thick snow still falling from the sky paled before the warmth of their embrace: a last goodbye before a separation of an undetermined duration. Maybe Phoenix will not be able to settle, or maybe he will get arrested again, but thinking about it would not help preventing it from happening. Instead, the fleeing prisoner focused on the moment, the slow breathing of his best friend against his neck and the arms hanging so low on his back. It had been years since he had last felt so alive and so cherished, what a shame he will have to start anew so far away. But he had to leave and pick back up the pieces of himself he had shattered.
Much to his surprise, a few seconds into the hug Phoenix heard a quiet sob. It echoed in his ears and tightened his throat. Another one followed and brought a little bit of moisture to his eyes. Maybe it was late hour and the lack of sleep which caused this, but he had never seen Miles so expressive before. Letting emotions take freely control of himself was unlike the prosecutor. Yet, it was refreshing, and Phoenix soon pulled his treasured friend even closer, letting his own tears silently fall of his face. A few minutes passed with the two men standing perfectly still, wordlessly pouring their feelings onto each other.
“Wright, I want you to live. Please.” Miles suddenly broke the silence and aligned his teary face with Phoenix’s, looking deep into his eyes “I cannot stand the thought of you so far away from me. So promise me you’ll be safe. Promise me we’ll somehow meet again.”
How could Phoenix ever say no to this? How could he deny these stormy eyes from what they longed for? When Miles’ hands left the comfortable hollow of Phoenix’s back for his cheeks, intensifying that tender stare, a warmth the likes of which he had never felt erupted in his chest; one that even a thousand flames could not match. A tickle in his heart made him feel like hands had started to cradle it, gently holding it while it weld back together with the sheer heat of their embrace. It was like a magnetic force had suddenly manifested between them, as Phoenix’s eyes fluttered to Miles’ mouth and slowly, they both closed their eyes.
“I promise…” Phoenix answered as he irresistibly give into this warm felling.
Their lips met into a soft kiss, a touch almost worth the struggle they had been through. It was the finality of their history together in this country, but not necessarily the end, Phoenix told himself when they parted from one another, breathless. Hope finally flowed in his veins again, he would wait for Miles to find him and try his best to help him in this task. But now was the time for painful goodbyes, yet the hardest part of this long journey had yet to come.
“I think... it’s time for me to go.” Phoenix said, yet still could not find the strength to let go of the embrace.
Edgeworth nodded and was one to find the courage to finally let his arms fall off from Phoenix’s cheeks to his side, setting the other pair of arms into motion. The ex-attorney did not look away from the sweet face of the love of his life until he managed to tear them off by turning around and staring into the deep dark night. Neither of them found the courage to say farewell or goodbye. More words would only burden their hearts until the day they would meet again. As he walked off into the distance, Phoenix knew he had no plans, nowhere to go for sure. Yet he was sure that he had a goal: to someday see Miles again.