Actions

Work Header

Blood of Iron and Steel

Chapter 6: Will mommy be okay? - Five

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

“When you know, you know

When you know, you know

It kinda makes me laugh, runnin' down that path 

When you're good as gold

'Cause when you know, you know”

 

Kudelia helped her sister, who was tidying up her things in an excited manner. Lucine really seemed much happier, knowing that from that day on she would live with her older sister and would have someone to play with all day long.

Izuna and Akatsuki were helping as best they could, namely, playing with their aunt's toys and being quiet, without getting in the way. Akatsuki was just annoying her sister, other than that, nothing bothersome.

Lucine's room was a shock with so many pink things, it was making Kudelia dizzy. There were too many things in the room, especially at that moment, that they were moving everything out of place. Lucine herself had commented that she found the room too pink, and that sometimes she couldn't sleep well because of the exorbitant brightness.

She folded another one of Lucine's clothes, putting it in the suitcase. She was thinking about how to explain to her wife that she had left with two children and would return with four, it would take a while, but she knew that Atra wouldn't mind much. The biggest problem was, in fact, where she would put her sisters for now. 

Kudelia could buy the house before she returned, but she would need the furniture. She would need to do everything urgently. The girl took a deep breath, looking at her younger sister, who was having trouble reaching one of the shelves in her closet. The older one stood up, reaching the shelf without difficulty: 

–Which one do you want? – Kudelia asked calmly. 

–The pink one. 

–Which one of the pink ones? Be more specific, they’re all pink. – The older one joked. 

–The rabbit. 

–That one? – She said, taking it. Lucine nodded and happily took it from her sister’s hands, putting it in her suitcase. Once again, only that day, she sighed deeply, running her hands through her hair. She thought for a moment, despite everything, this was a situation for a good cause, to keep her sisters safe. 

–How are you, Aina? – said a boy a little older than Kudelia from the doorway. The young woman recognized that timbre, which made her spine shiver. She didn't like hearing that voice.

The blonde turned to face her older half-brother. One of the twins. The youngest. Scarily similar to herself and, at the same time, to her daughter, Izuna. The man had orange-blond hair and extremely blue eyes, which were so dark they seemed opaque. He was tall, taller than her, and robust, the result of years of military service. He had a broken nose, because when he was younger, he had fallen off a swing while playing with his twin. His features were frighteningly reminiscent of Kudelia's own features, the only difference being their noses. A cynical smile burned on the man's face, which exuded sarcasm and inflated ego:

–I was fine before I arrived with your illustrious presence, Tion. What do you want, brother? –Kudelia asked. Tion enters the room, still with a smile on his face, passing straight past his stepsister and approaching Izuna and Akatsuki, who were extremely alert with their uncle's sudden approach. They both had a bad feeling about him.

–Yeah, your kids aren't bad at all, sister. Congratulations. – Tion says, bending down to the children's height. Akatsuki stands in front of his sister, protecting her. –What scared children. Don't worry, I don't bite. I'm your uncle, Tion. What's your name, boy?

–Akatsuki. – He answers dryly, the boy's expression hardening more and more with each second that the man remained in front of him.

–Akatsuki? What a beautiful name. And yours, princess? – He asks, touching Izuna's face, who feels increasingly uncomfortable, squeezing his brother's wrist. Kudelia notices this and intervenes, separating them and standing in front of the children. – Wow, Aina, your daughter didn't even tell me her name.

–Her name is Izuna, Tion, in case you want to know so much. Just leave my children alone, brother. It's better for your skin. Don't mess with them, if you do, you know what to do. – Kudelia warns, making her brother move away and his smile diminish.

– Are you threatening me, little sister? – He asks.

– If that's what you interpreted, I believe so. – She mocks without fear.

– Don't challenge me, girl. – He warns.

– Never, brother. I'm fully aware of what you're capable of and I feel disgusted by you. – She answers with a smile. – And, Kion, stay away from Lucine. – The other twin looks at her disappointed for having lost a target. Lucine runs to her sister, sticking her tongue out at Kion right after hiding behind her older sister's legs. Kion's expression hardens in hatred for the younger one's insolence. The two were identical twins, the only difference between them was their noses, since Kion's wasn't broken.

– Aina, I was just messing with our younger sister. – He says in a sad tone. –We just came to say goodbye to them, right, Tion? – He asks as he hugs his twin from the side, who looks to the corner in disgust before saying anything.

–Yes. We just came to say goodbye to our little sister and meet our nephews. Especially the girl . –He whispers the last sentence.

Who you almost killed before she was born the last time we saw each other. –She remembers, answering in the same tone, so that none of the children can hear.

Accidents happen, sister. That was an accident . –Tion retorts.

“As if a seven-month pregnant woman tripping and falling on her belly against an extremely sharp table was an accident, when her brother was in front of her when she went to pass and pushing her wasn't the least bit suspicious.” Kudelia thinks, but doesn't share her opinion.

–Guys, enough exchanging barbs and fighting! We're family. –Kion says. –And we're in front of children.

–If you've already said goodbye to her and met your nephews, leave now, I have more things to pack. Or do you want anything else? –She asks impatiently.

–No, no. We're going to say goodbye to our other sister now. – Kion answers, leaving the room. – Let's go, Tion. It was great to see you again, Aina.

It was an accident. – The last thing Tion says to Kudelia before leaving, which makes her think.

The two leave the room, after a few seconds, Lucine comes out from behind her sister and checks the hallways, returning soon after happy:

– They're gone. – Lucine says. – Finally. Zuzu, let's get some dolls. You can choose some for yourself too.

– Really?! – She asks excitedly. Lucine agrees. – Let's go!

The two girls go to the happy dollhouse. Kudelia feels Akatsuki's hand squeeze against hers, she quickly bends down to his height:

–Are you okay, Atsu? –Kudelia asks worriedly.

–Mama, I didn't like them. Not at all. They scare me. –Akatsuki says with a choked voice. Kudelia takes a deep breath, cradling him in her arms, in a way that only a mother could. She strokes her little boy's head, placing a kiss on his temple.

–Don't be afraid, my brave boy. I'm here with you. And your mother too. We will always protect you. –Kudelia calms down. Akatsuki seeks more comfort in his mother's arms.

–Is mommy going to be okay? –Akatsuki asks worriedly. –I heard Aunt Merribit saying it was serious. Is she going to be okay?

Kudelia doesn't say anything for a few seconds, searching for the right words. She couldn't find a way to answer that other than "I don't know, Akatsuki.", which would be the correct thing to say:

–I don't know, my son. I really have no idea how your mother is going to be. But I hope she will get better and be fine. –Kudelia answers. –Then have hope too. In this uncertain world, which will still hurt much more, don't stop having hope. That is the light at the end of the tunnel. And, never lose, under any circumstances, your humanity, your will to live, your hope, your essence and your faith. Not faith in other people, but faith in yourself.

–Hope and faith in me? –Akatsuki asks. Kudelia agrees. Akatsuki hadn't successfully understood everything his mother had told him, but he believed that that advice would be useful to him, so he kept it in his childish mind. –I didn't understand anything you said, mama. But it seems wise, so I'll obey. –He answers. Kudelia laughs at the boy's comment. –Mommy will be fine!

–Yes, she will. –Kudelia agrees. –But I think she'll kill me for bringing the girls without warning.

–She won't, mommy. I think she'll just be shocked, I think. –Akatsuki reassures.

–I hope so. Thank you, Atsu. –She answers gratefully, while ruffling his hair. He blushes a little with his mother's affection.

 

At home, after helping Neoma and Lucine to tidy up their temporary rooms and Atra receiving the news, the two adults left the children to talk alone.

Atra sighed deeply after receiving her wife's clear explanation:

–So that's it? – Atra asks, leaning against the desk in their room. Kudelia agrees, sitting on the edge of the bed. – Okay, they can stay here. I know how much you wanted to get them out of the mansion, but you could have warned me before, Kudelia. And, we'll have to find space for them somehow, our house can't accommodate six people at the same time. What are you going to do?

– I was thinking about buying a new house, closer to the city, for us to live in for now. I think it would be better, because of your treatment and my work. – Kudelia puts her idea on the table, while Atra begins to weigh her wife's suggestion. Atra hadn't really enjoyed leaving that house and the farm, where she had created so many memories and the place where Mikazuki wanted to continue his life, after fulfilling his duties with Orga, and worst of all, Kudelia had thought about buying a new house, because of Atra and her illness.

–Atra, I know you don't want to leave all this behind. I don't want that either, but for now it's the best for all of us. –Kudelia continued, as if she had read her wife's mind. She had stood up while saying those words, soon she was in front of her wife and took one of Atra's hands. –It's better for you, Atra. I didn't want to leave the place he wanted to live with us after everything, Atra, never, but he wouldn't want to force you to live without proper treatment. There are times when we have to abandon, temporarily or permanently, our desires for our survival.

Atra looked at her wife, apprehensive, very apprehensive. Atra's heart ached to leave that place, she didn't want to. For her, it was like leaving Mikazuki's dreams behind, leaving him behind in some way. Abandoning his memories behind, out of selfishness. Even though she knew it wasn't like that, Atra would always have his memories with her, including more than vivid memories, she feared. Atra only remembered Mikazuki's appearance, from the photos and the children, but if she didn't have that, she wouldn't remember, her memory was already playing tricks on her, failing Atra:

–But, it's like abandoning him. Kudelia, I can't do that. – Atra says in a tearful tone. Kudelia lowers her head and shakes her head negatively at her wife's comment, then looks back at her. Those beautiful violet irises stared at Atra, and the younger girl could see a bit of melancholy and... disappointment, deep in those eyes.

–Atra, you are not abandoning him by temporarily leaving this house, but rather, fulfilling his wish. His greatest wish, above all, was to see you well, above all circumstances, he wanted you well. Mikazuki made me promise that we would be well. And I do not want to break that promise, not only because he wants you well, but because I do too. –Kudelia says in a firm but at the same time drawn out tone. Atra widens her eyes, surprised by her wife's words and moved. With her other hand, the older one caresses the younger one's face, affectionately. –I could not bear to lose anyone else, Atra. I could not bear to lose you too, Atra. After his death, I only held on because of you and theirs . If you die, I will have no direction, how will I take care of our children without you? How will I live without you?

The younger one feels tears appear in her eyes, as she presses her wife's hand against her face. Atra had never imagined that:

-Oh, Kudelia… - Atra says with regret.

-I never told you, but… I no longer remember Mika’s tone . My memory failed me. I try to remember, but I don’t remember. It hurts , Atra. It hurts a lot. - Kudelia reveals with tears in her eyes, which ran down her face. - I can’t remember his voice. I forgot his and Fumitan’s voices a long time ago, I don’t want to forget yours either.

The younger woman doesn’t answer anything else, she just pulls her wife into a warm hug. In those moments, one always sought comfort in the other’s arms. It was a pain that only they shared. A pain that only they had any idea how to comfort each other. The pain of loss. The loss of a part that became crucial to them. Atra takes a deep breath:

–I think it’s better if we move, maybe… that’s what he would want. – Atra says finally.

–We’ll go back, Atra. After you're well, we'll go back and I'll renovate this house. –Kudelia answers, while wiping away a tear.

–Kudelia.

–Yes?

–I love you. I'll never leave you. –Atra declares in a whisper, while inhaling her wife's scent in that embrace. Kudelia widens her eyes on the other side, but smiles, while sighing.

–I love you too. –Kudelia states with conviction. –I will always love you.

They both think the same thing: "I love you both." Neither needed to say it out loud, they both knew it.

 

Julieta walked through Gjallarhorn Headquarters, pushing Gaelio's wheelchair. Rustal had requested their presence immediately, which was not expected by either of them. That request had been very unexpected.

The two walked in silence, which was occasionally interrupted by other soldiers greeting their superiors. Both were lost in their own thoughts.

Julieta thought about the squads that her master had sent a few weeks ago, of which Rustal did not want to reveal the reason for their departure.

Gaelio thought about his sister, Almiria, who became known after the Incident as the Widow Child. The girl, who had recently turned 16, disappeared without a trace. That was worrying the man absurdly, as there was no clue as to his sister's whereabouts since the search began three months ago. Gaelio did not understand why his sister had run away. She had everything good and the best, she had freedom, it made no sense.

Almiria Balduin had regained her original family name after her late husband's attempted coup and also returned to live in her old house, under her father's care. The girl became reclusive and stormy, and fell into a depression that she sank deeper and deeper into. She did not allow any servants to enter her room, except her own mother, who brought the girl food, bathed her and kept her company. Almiria feared all the men around her, created deep traumas for some reason, she even feared her own father and brother.

The two arrived at their destination without having exchanged a single word during the entire journey, they did not care to talk.

Julieta was surprised to see two guards protecting the door, but she said nothing. The soldiers recognized them quickly and let them pass, as expected. As soon as they entered, they saw Elion mumbling something, apparently... irritated? Okay, the situation must have been critical:

–Sir? – Julieta called out fearfully. Rustal takes a deep breath before looking at Gaelio and Juliet, smiling. That smile should have been calming, but it sent shivers down the spines of the bravest. –We’re here as you requested. What happened?

 –Remember the troops I sent four weeks ago? – Elion asks, sitting down, his expression becoming serious again. They both nod. –They were completely massacred.

–How? Massacred? – Juliet asks in surprise. 

–There were no survivors. They all died. – Rustal says. 

–What kind of enemy did they face? – Gaelio asks. 

–A small fleet of five ships, according to the cameras. – Elion replies, again irritated. 

–Only five ships? How could they defeat a complete Gjallarhorn fleet? – Gaelio asks in surprise. –It’s impossible for any pirate to be so powerful, maybe Teiwaz… 

–It wasn’t Teiwaz, or pirates. This enemy isn’t from here. He’s not from the Solar System. – The elder reveals, surprising his subordinates even more.

– Aliens!? – They both exclaim at the same time. Rustal agrees. Julieta and Gaelio look at each other.

– They started moving two months ago, massacring the ships that guarded the border. I sent a fleet to start with, which was extinguished in minutes. Then another larger one, which met the same end and finally this larger one, which you already know. I underestimated these invaders. – Rustal explains. – I didn't imagine they could be so powerful, it never crossed my mind. A troop managed to pass the images and… – He turns the monitor screen to his students, who watch attentively.

– What the hell is this? – Gaelio exclaims in surprise. The giant suit was what Rustal showed them, next to the monstrosity of… metal? there was a Gjallarhorn suit, which looked like a toy next to it.

–Their suit. I believe they got one, possibly a Gundam, and replicated it in their own way. We can see that the structure is similar, but it is a thousand times more technological than ours. We can see from this suit alone that their technology is more advanced than ours. –Elion explains.

–Our suits are 3 to 5 meters tall on average, some are 6, but they look like a toy compared to this thing. –Julieta observes. –But the bigger the suit, the heavier and slower it is.

–It was supposed to be, but… –Rustal clicks on the keyboard and the fight begins. The suit became almost invisible, only being seen by its red eye, which was just a line. Julieta remembered Barbatos when she saw the red light, which gave her chills. –That didn't happen. He is very fast and his reaction speed is on par with the Demon's.

–What is your plan? –Gaelio asks impatiently. –You two are my best pilots and the best chance of defeating this suit. –Rustal says. –I'll send you two there, along with the main Arianhord troop. We have to defeat these invaders before they pass Neptune. –he continues. –Is it okay to get back to work, Gaelio?

–Of course, sir. –Gaelio says.

–Was it fixed? –Julieta asks Gaelio.

–Yes, it's completely fixed and ready. –Gaelio says.

–And Julia? –Now the question is directed to Elion.

–I sent it for adjustments, they must be finished. –He answers.

–When do we leave? –Gaelio asks calmly and a little anxiously.

–In two days, get ready. You're dismissed. –Elion says. The two agree and say goodbye to the man. Julieta takes Gaelio's wheelchair and takes him out of the room.

 

The engineer was in shock.

Too surprised to say anything.

Until she gave a confident and even, we could say, macabre smile. She turned to Hatsumi, who was already looking at her:

–Did you like what you see? – Hatsumi asked with a gentle smile, while leaning against a pillar.

–Of course, Hatsumi. – The engineer said. Hatsumi had taken the girl to the place where she took care of Mikazuki and where she hid Barbatos, with the intention of the girl improving Barbatos. It was only fair, since the girl had found that place alone, to give her some kind of prize. 

“How long have you had the Gundam?”

–For 5 years, Thalia. It’s not just Barbatos that I have, but his pilot is also here. – Hatsumi revealed, making Thalia’s eyes widen in surprise.

–The Demon didn’t die?

–He’s too stubborn and resistant for that. – Hatsumi replied calmly. Thalia bursts out laughing.

–I knew the guy in the rumors wouldn't die so easily, as they say. Julieta really couldn't kill him. – Thalia says. –Then he must be much stronger than they say.

–Julieta is no match for him. She only managed to leave him in a coma, due to his exhaustion. And she knows that and knows that he's alive. – Hatsumi says.

–Did she help you? – She asks.

–Yes. And what do you think of the proposal? – The woman with red eyes asks the girl with the same color curls.

–Being able to adjust Barbatos as much as I want, without budget limits, with a single request to design an interface that won't overload the pilot, even with the Gundam at its full potential? Of course I want it! – Thalia says. She had thought the proposal was wonderful, she had always dreamed of being able to touch that Gundam. Thalia was someone trustworthy, Hatsumi knew that, but even so, it was better to observe her. 

–Promise me this will be our little secret. –Hatsumi says, in a passive-aggressive tone.

–Promise. –Hatsumi smiles in response to Thalia's statement. –Now, can I explore him?

–I liked what I heard. Of course. –Hatsumi answers, while handing the tablet with all the Gundam's information to the girl. –Here is his file, you can look at it and study the Gundam for yourself.

–Thank you, Hatsumi. –Thalia receives the tablet and starts reading all the files, which were many. Hatsumi smiles, leaving the girl there. –Where are you going?

–It's time for Mikazuki's check-up, I have to go. –Hatsumi says goodbye.

 

The sound of hospital machines became even more common for Hatsumi in those 5 years. Every day checking on Mikazuki made her accustomed to it. Always the same routine, listening to his heartbeat, checking his eye response to light, his muscle response and his blood pressure. Mikazuki was fine, as fine as someone in a coma and with quadriplegia. 

That day, Hatsumi noticed that Mikazuki no longer needed respiratory support, so she removed the machines. For a few minutes, she watched the young man breathe, to be sure. 

Due to his lack of movement, his muscles contracted and he became quite slender, losing over time all the body he had. He also did not grow, perhaps all that data affected his growth or, due to malnutrition and the terrible life he had, something had affected it. But none of this stopped him from aging, he looked like a 20-year-old boy, despite the height of a teenager before puberty. 

He had several scars, but one in particular stood out more than the others. The scar that almost killed him. It covered a large part of his chest and almost went past his collarbone. It was terribly frightening. It would be a ghost that would follow him for the rest of his life, because Hatsumi doubted that it would disappear, perhaps become less noticeable, but disappearing… was impossible.

Hatsumi sighed, tired. With each passing day, it would become more difficult to reverse his quadriplegia. She had to race against time. She needed at least a little of his children's blood, a little bit from one of them and she would be able to do more. Just one drop:

–I know you hear me, I think. –Hatsumi said. In her moments of solitude, she talked to Mikazuki, even though he wouldn't answer. –With each passing day, it gets harder to save you, you know? The surgery you'll have to undergo requires a lot of blood, and your body doesn't accept just any blood. You really are hard to save.

 Silence. Hatsumi laughs:

–I only needed a drop of blood from one of your children who is compatible, but it’s very difficult. Kudelia wouldn’t allow it, she protects those children tooth and nail. –Hatsumi notices that when she mentioned Kudelia’s name, his heartbeat increased. He really should have listened. –You really love her, don’t you? Kudelia and Atra. –Again. –Them then. You’re really weird.

Just the noise of the machines:

–You must think about the reason I want to save you, right? Well, it’s because you’re kind of my nephew. More precisely, a second cousin, even though you don’t have the same blood, since my mother was adopted. Your mother was my cousin and you, being her son, are also my cousin. Your mother and I were raised together, why? My mother died giving birth to me, so my aunt adopted me. –Hatsumi reveals, a little emotional as she remembers Mikazuki’s mother. –I saw your mother grow up and marry your father, and have you and your sister. And I saw my little sister die, with my brother-in-law and my little niece. I thought you were dead too, until I found you, almost dead.

Even quieter:

–You look a lot like her, Mikazuki. Your daughter looks even more like her. –Hatsumi says in a choked tone. –And by a great coincidence, she was given the same name as your mother. Izuna . One was Izuna Haitani . The other, Izuna Augus . Grandmother and granddaughter .

Hatsumi wipes away a single tear that insisted on falling down her face:

–You probably don’t remember your mother. She was incredible, Mikazuki. She was the best person I ever knew. The kindest, the sweetest, the most adorable. She was too pure for this world. I remember that she had a very unique dream, Izuna wanted to make a garden with all the flowers in existence. In the end, she couldn’t fulfill this dream. –Hatsumi reveals. In the end, she couldn’t hold back her tears. How she missed her sister. She couldn’t wait to see him awake and tell him this while he was conscious.

How she wanted to go back to the past. Back to the night she met Izuna. It was all so simple back then, she was so happy. She was getting to know her little sister in her mother's arms. Izuna with those big, round eyes, which her mother said were that way because her little sister had a genetic condition called heterochromia, which made her eyes different colors. In her case, she had complete heterochromia, where one eye was green and the other blue. Izuna was a smiling, happy baby.

Hatsumi remembers how Izuna loved to hear fairy tales, sometimes she would run away from the nanny to go to the playground and come back covered in mud, how she loved flowers and was always humming. Then, how she loved her children, to the point of doing something that Hatsumi didn't know how to do, to save them, to save her oldest. Hatsumi remembered Izuna talking to her and saying: "You never love anything in the world the way you love your first child. That sentence has never made so much sense." At the time, Hatsumi thought that was nonsense, it was just a phrase from a character in a series that her sister repeated, until she had her Ryuu, almost 16 years later.

Izuna loved his children more than anything in the world. He loved his family more than anything. He gave his life to protect his son. It was Hatsumi's duty to keep him alive, in honor of her sister.

Little did she know, that the one who had killed her everything was closer than anyone had ever been.



Notes:

And she's alive! What a miracle! Guys, sorry for not posting in the last two months, I've been hit by a creative block that really knocked me down. I think this chapter is more melancholic than usual, since I was only able to write it while listening to sad songs. Hatsumi's POV must be the heaviest, since I listened to it while listening to Born to Die and The night we meet. I hope you had a good read. And guys, I read a Kudelia/Atra fanfic that took my breath away. It was simply perfect. I read it like a lovestruck idiot, screaming at the pillows because it was so adorable and spontaneous, it was so them and it was hilarious too. The name of the fic was: (Don't) Say Anything by user: grAveryard, read it. Just read it.