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English
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Published:
2024-02-03
Updated:
2024-11-05
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6,982
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8/?
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The Grifftonian Scriptures (The Bible As God Intended)

Chapter 8: Live life, Don't Let Life Live You (Pt 1)

Summary:

Many years before the conflict between William Afton and Brian Griffin froam Family Guy, a son was born.

Notes:

Yeah, heh, it has been awhile heheheheehehheheheh... The voices have been reunited for a bit now, and with winter coming maybe we will be able to grind out some more chapters, that being said, I think this is the most I've ever committed to something in my entire life. We give to you this brand new chapter (they always look so much girthier in the google doc) and the next part is already almost completely written so that will def come soon!
With this new chapter we are also going back in and making some alterations to the seven deadly sins, so if you are interested you should go check out chapter one for details! Thankies for reading! -SloppyNuts

Chapter Text

Twilight Sparkle laid in her bed, head in her hooves. She was in quite the predicament, and was contemplating how she even got to this point in the first place. Many years ago Twilight Sparkle had met the love of her life. A kind, caring, funny, and handsome blue bird named Mordecai. Their meeting had been by chance, but from that first moment Twilight was head over hooves in love. Twilight winced, as she remembered the looks of admonishment that had appeared on her friends faces after she told them about her brand new boytoy. “I thought you were gay…” mumbled Apple Jack. “Does this mean you're leaving the polycule?!” shouted a distraught Pinkie Pie. After that day Twilight's “friends” had tried desperately to convince Twilight that Mordecai was bad news. And for a time it had worked. Twilight had distanced herself from Mordecai and their relationship nearly ended for good. But one day as Twilight sat and stared up and the star speckled New York City skyline she noticed an airplane headed straight for the Twin Towers! This plane had reminded her of a mystical shooting star. With tear filled eyes twilight wished upon that Boeing 767, that Mordecai would take her back. This wish had been followed by a ring on the doorbell of her apartment, the ringer was, of course, Mordecai and the two have been nearly inseparable ever since.

Besides the disapproval of their friends and families there had been a few other... hiccups. The first one being that they lived in a society, strangely enough, in a world with all sorts of funky creatures running amok, interspecies relationships were generally frowned upon. Another issue had come from a doctor few years ago, that issue being the fact that they would never be able to conceive a child. Twilight let out a bitter laugh that echoed through the bedroom, if only that doctor could see her now… “Twilight? Is everything alright dear?” A concerned Mordecai poked his head through the door. Twilight looked at her lover and so desperately wanted to spill her guts to him, but not yet, she wasn’t ready yet. She had to be sure. She held back her equine tears and formed her muzzle into a gentle smile. “Everything is fine my love, I hope you have a good day at work.” Mordecai stared skeptically at her for a moment, far from convinced. “Are you sure Twi? I can call in sick today and we can watch a movie or something?” Twilight was quick to wave him off, she felt sick with how eager she was to push away the only man she had ever loved. She reached for Mordecai’s hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “I’m fine honey, we can watch a movie tomorrow when you’re not scheduled.” Mordecai smiled at Twilight and the both mumbled quick “I love yous” before Mordecai had finally left for work.

Twilight let out a sigh of relief. She used her unicorn magic to open the drawer to her nightstand and pull out the pregnancy test. She closed her eyes and held her breath. When she opened her eyes and let the air escape her, she was met with two lines boring into her soul. She let out a sob. How could this be, me and Mordecai have never even done anything- I have never even done anything. Her thoughts were interrupted by the groovy sounds of Latin hip-hop “Excuse me, I couldn’t help but notice, are you... going through a tough time?” Twilight’s bloodshot eyes glued onto the source of the disturbance. “Who- who are you?” She kept her eyes locked onto the bald headed and dapperly dressed individual as she frantically reached for her phone in order to summon Mordecai back to their residence. But she was too slow, her assailant held up Twilight's Samsung Galaxy S16 and responded cool and confident. “That doesn’t matter, all you need to know is that I’ve been there, done that.” He nodded his head at the positive pregnancy test. Twilight looked at the figure in shock, but before she could question him, he went on “You see, I look at this game from a different perspective. You must be wondering how you are pregnant, luckily for you I am experienced in such issues- In all issues as a matter of fact" he paused for a moment to ponder and stroke is chin. “The lazy creator of this universe needed a vessel for his kin. A back up plan of sorts. It’s likely you were selected at random.” The man pushed up his shades and dropped the Samsung Galaxy S16 onto the floor and headed towards the exit, before stopping and nonchalantly turning his head a bit to the side. Giving Twilight an odd look through the corner of his sunglasses as he said, “Nothing personal.” Then Mordecai’s voice echoed through the house “Twilight are you listening to music? Ugh you know I hate Latin hip-ho- Pitbull?!” The man, Pitbull, looked at the blue bird a moment before sighing. “With all the negativity going on in the world right now, people need an escape. When you give them a hit record or a great record, it allows them to escape for at least three to four minutes. They're not thinking about the economy or immigration or capitalism or war when you create that kind of ambiance.” And with that he took his leave,  aura trailing after him. 

Mordecai sat next to Twilight on the bed, he looked beside himself, “Twilight wha- why was he here? What was that man doing in my house- our house?” Twilight put her hooves up in an attempt to placate him, “Mordecai I’m…” she trailed off “You’re what? Spit it out.” Mordecai’s tone was commanding “I’m late.” Mordecai’s eyes widened in shock, but before he could react Twilight broke down into tears. “I-I don’t even know who that man was, he just appeared in our bedroom! He- he said something about the creator of this universe, and and and a vessel, and about how he has been there done that?-” She was inconsolable, “I swear Mordecai, I have only ever seen you, loved you, wanted you.” Mordecai looked at his feathered hands, he had a choice to make. And a choice he made, the whole truth could be extracted later, but for right now Twilight needed him. He took the mare, his mare into a tight embrace, “It’s okay Twi, we’ll get through this, just like the last time and the time before that.” He paused for a moment searching for words to say, “And who knows, maybe this was a blessing in disguise, we will finally have a child of our own.” Twilight nuzzled closer into his arms, and the two sat like that for awhile, content to be in each other's company, only being interrupted by the blaring ring of a cellphone, it was Mordecai’s boss, “Where the fuck are you!? You were supposed to be at work an hour ago you lousy sack of-” Mordecai ended the call and sighed, guess I’ll need to find a new job…