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The portal dropped the heroes on the twisting path leading the way up to a welcoming ranch. Time jumped up, recognizing their surroundings and began half-skipping, half-walking his way to the house. The others followed behind, vaguely recognizing the land from the last time they had been in this Hyrule.
Upon reaching the top of the hill and entering through the wooden arch, they were spotted by Malon, who put down Time from the hug the two had engaged in. She eyed the others, taking a careful glance back at Time.
“Oh, Fairy Boy. Ya certainly do like ta get yourself into trouble.”
Time scoffed. “What’re you talking about? I think trouble is drawn to me.” His smirk took over face as his arm crossed over his chest.
“Well can ya at least help me get ‘em settled inside if you’re gonna go ‘round ‘attractin’ trouble.”
Time nodded enthusiastically before schooling his expression and gesturing for the others to follow, ready for a break from the constant traveling.
As the group settled into the house, everyone broke off to put their stuff away and prepare for their stay that night. Malon and Time had already walked to the back of the house, Twilight trailing after before coming back, while the remaining heroes stayed within the living and dining rooms, carefully moving stuff out of their way to sit down.
Champion began settling onto the couch, no longer wincing when she sat down, but still favoring her right side. Wind watched inquisitively as Advent came to sit beside her, asking about foraging in other eras. The two began holding a calm conversation in sign, Advent started to bounce his leg.
“I’d show you here, but I think I should stay and help Malon with dinner. Tomorrow ma-”
“No! You two are going to go into that forest, get covered in mud, and make Age go fully gray when you come back telling him the countless bears you fought without weapons!” Wind shouted, already getting a sigh out of Age.
“Well, how can we ignore that?”asked Advent, helping her up and pushing Champion out the door.
The door closed behind the two as Malon emerged from the kitchen. “Now I wasn’t expecting this much comp’ny, so I’m gonna need more supplies from town to feed all y’all. Fairy Boy’s already comin’ with, anyone else wanna tag along?”
Light raised their hand, jumping to their feet with the movement, boots softly thudding on the floor.
“Anyone else?”
A few of the remaining shook their heads, the others continued to sit around avoiding eye contact.
“Well, we’ll be back in an hour or two, just make sure that the two who already left clean up ‘fore comin’ back inside.”
Mumbled agreements were said as the three left the house. After waiting a few minutes, listening for any early return, Twilight jumped up, rubbing his hands together and facing the others, who looked up unimpressed.
“Any y'all wanna help out with a surprise for Champ?” they asked.
Sky raised his hand, but the others kept to themselves. “Wind? Age?”
Wind was about to agree, but after looking at the mischievous grin on Majora’s face, hiding behind Twilight, quickly shook his head and followed them out the back door.
“I’d love to help, but something tells me those two’ll need watching. Maybe Legend can help. All their adventures must a taught them something useful for whatever your doin’,” Age explained, slowly rising and tracing the steps Wind and Majora had just taken.
Sky and Twilight both turned to Legend, who looked up from the book both were sure they weren’t actually reading.
“Not that I’m opposed to helpin’, but what exactly is this surprise for Champion?”
“Well, I was thinkin-”
“Be careful doin’ that,” Legend interrupted.
“I was THINKIN’, we could bake something for her. She’s always cookin’ and doin’ stuff for us, so I wanna repay that.”
“You do remember that we’ve all been banned from cooking for numerous reasons, right?” Legend raised an eyebrow with this question.
Twilight huffed before starting again. “I know that. It’s why I asked Malon for a recipe ‘fore she could find reason not to and left. We’ve got a few hours to try out this cookie recipe she gave me. An’ the more help we get the less likely somethin’ bad ‘ill happen.”
Legend sighed, slowly standing and looking up to Twilight’s face. “This isn’t going to end well, but I’ll help you. Hopefully we’ll get something edible out of it.”
~ ~ ~
Light skipped down the streets of Castletown, idly listening to the conversation between Time and Malon, who walked behind them.
“So, all y’all are heroes through time brought together. But for what?” Malon asked.
“We don’t really know. We’ve just been traveling around and killing monsters with black blood. Though we did come across this weird lizalfos once, but it just ran off.”
“A lizalfos? An’ it escaped ten heroes?”
Time scoffed. “It was stronger than normal. Almost reacting as if it were Hylian. Believe me, if I had a chance to kill it, I would have taken it.”
Malon stopped at a stall filled with fruits and vegetables, carefully checking the produce to see if it was ripe before setting it aside to be paid for.
“So, Light was it? What’s your home like?” Malon asked.
Light pondered the question, staring intently at the bell peppers held in a basket at the stand. “I don’t really know how to describe it. It kinda feels like this time, but smaller. Everything is closer together, but not by much. And everyone knows everyone, so you never feel out of place. Before and between adventures I mostly spent time with my Grandpa working in the smith, or maybe walking through the forest.”
“Oh, what would you do in the forest?”
“Catch up with friends mostly, but sometimes it’s nice to take a stroll. Again, I mostly work with my Grandpa.”
Malon exchanged rupees with the vendor and placed the produce in her basket, leading the way further into the market to pick up supplies for the heroes to continue on their journey.
The three stopped to pick up extra potions so Champion wouldn’t have to make all of them, more arrows as they always seemed to be running out, a couple of bombs to be kept from the heroes with more tendencies for pyromania, and an extra water canteen for Wind, who had found a crack in his the previous day.
As they approached one of the final necessary stops of the day—a butcher displaying the best variety of meats kept fresh by an ice rod that chilled the air— Time felt a figure moving in the shadows behind them. When fae turned around, fae found nothing standing out behind them.
They kept a close eye as Malon bartered with the vendor and Light wandered over to a stand selling knives and small metal sculptures. When Malon turned to them and asked him to carry the meat, as she was still carrying everything they had bought throughout the day, he turned back to find Light missing.
“CLUCK! MOO! OINK!”
Time, Malon, and the butcher all startled when the stall began to make the noises of the animals whose meat sat on display
“NOOOOO!! WHY WOULD YOU EAT ME! MY BROTHER IS MUCH TASTIER! DOES THE GLUTTONY OF HYLIANS KNOW NO END!”
The high pitched voice was coming from beneath the fabric hiding the underside of the table the meat was sitting on. More wailing came, begging for life to come again and to eat their family members instead. One “cucco” went so far as to threaten to begin eating Hylians (as if they didn’t already).
Time, much to the disappointment of Malon and the butcher, decided to join in with the voices floating from below the table. “Oh, forgive us ignorant Hylians for our shortcomings! I shall never lay a finger on any living creature again! Be it fowl or foe, I vow to treasure all life and never eat meat! I am at your service, lords of the meat butchered for the consumption of others!”
Malon sighed and rolled her eyes at the theatrics, bending down to pull up the fabric, revealing Wind, Light, and Majora, laughing at everything they said.
Age came sprinting, out of breath and pointed an accusatory finger at the three. “You are gonna be the death of me. Can’t you have fun somewhere else in any other way? Do you have to disrupt the market goers and vendors?!”
“Yes!” all three chirped, not even looking at one another as it was said.
Age groaned, while Time and the others all began laughing once more.
~ ~ ~
“Mix together the wet ingredients in a medium sized bowl,” Twilight paused. “Why is sugar listed as a wet ingredient?”
Legend turned to the recipe and looked it over. “Hell if I know. We should just do what it says though.”
“But sugar isn’t wet? Maybe we should mix it with the dry stuff first,” Sky offered.
“Nah, let’s do what it says at first, there must be a reason for this… mistake? Well, Malon was the one who gave it to me, and we haven’t died by her cookin’ yet, so I reckon she must know somethin’.” Twilight whisked together the dry ingredients as he said this, watching as the two followed the instructions despite what their logic would have them say.
They mixed together the two bowls, only dropping a cup or two of flour, and stared at the next part of the recipe.
“I remember Malon tellin’ me to not follow a part a this recipe, but I don’t remember what that was.” They frowned, looking over the next step, telling them to divide the dough and add different food dye to the separated doughs.
“Don’t you think that is something we should have known going in?!” Legend exclaimed, Sky standing back but nodding his head in agreement, struggling to keep an amused smirk off his face.
Though he agreed with Legend, Sky stepped forward and grabbed the recipe from Twilight’s hands. “I think we should just keep following what it says. It had to have been written for a reason.”
The three continued to work on the cookies, doing what they could to follow what the recipe said. As more ingredients were added to the bowl, more ended up on the counter and in the air, until they were left with two bowls of cookie dough, one a bright yellow, the other a deep blue.
Sky poked the dough. It stuck to his finger for a brief moment before falling back into the bowl. “Are we sure this is what cookie dough is meant to look like?”
“Well, the recipe doesn’t say we’re wrong,” Twilight reasoned.
Legend scoffed. “It also doesn’t say we’re right.”
“We should just keep going. I’m sure they’ll turn out fine. It’s the thought that counts anyway.”
“Sky’s right, Legend,” Twilight said, motioning to the dough, “if we just bake it and keep an eye on them, everything will turn out fine.”
Legend rolled his eyes as the three went to work, twisting the dough and setting it aside on the pan to be baked.
~ ~ ~
“Do you think this mushroom is edible?” Champion turned to Advent, holding up a brightly colored mushroom in her hand, bright pink with dark blue spots.
“I don’t know,” Advent said, taking a closer look before fae continued, “but Time would tell us if anything was super dangerous, right?”
Champion looked around and saw no other mushrooms resembling the one in her hands. She motioned for Advent to be silent, and carefully listened to the forest around them.
She heard the birds chirping and the light wind blowing the leaves and grass. Insects hummed, hiding in the low foliage and in the upper branches of the trees. Off to her left, she heard muffled laughter and quiet shushing, a smile coming to her face.
“Well, you know what to do with it then.”
“I do?” Advent asked with a puppy dog look.
“Yeah.” She took a few steps past Advent, carefully holding the mushroom into the light. “We eat it.”
The laughter suddenly stopped.
In a voice so low she could scarcely hear it, Champion listened as Wind asked, “Is that paint edible? Because I don’t think it is.”
Champion suddenly made a show of dropping the mushrooms she had collected in the mud, caking the surface and hiding the bright colors.
“Ah, here it is. Let me take a bite. It reminds me of one back home, so I’m sure it’s fine.”
As she bit into a mushroom, Wind jumped out, screaming for her to stop. Majora was pulling him back, watching everything play out with wide eyes and a feral grin.
Champion chewed carefully on the mushroom, giving Wind a confused look. She audibly swallowed before asking Wind what was the matter.
“I- I - Please drink a red potion! Please don’t get sick and die on me!”
Taking another, larger bite of the mushroom with mud sticking to her lips, Champion signed, “Why am I going to die?”
Wind wilted at that display, which only caused Majora to laugh. “Why are you laughing?! Champ is gonna die and it’ll be all our fault. That mushroom is poisoned and we let her eat it!” Majora only laughed harder at that as Champion continued to eat the mushroom until the entire cap and stock were gone.
“D’you mean this one?” she asked, rubbing the mud and some of the paint off of the offending mushroom.
Without looking at the mushroom in question, Wind wailed, “No, not that one, the one we painted and you ate! So please, drink this potion so that-” As he pulled the potion from he bag, he finally faced Champion and saw the full, uneaten, paint covered mushroom resting in her hand and a shit-eating grin on her face.
“You asshole.”
The whole group broke out into laughter as Majora led Wind back out of the forest and Champion and Hyrule continued exploring the surrounding woods.
~ ~ ~
Twilight, Sky, and Legend all stood before the kitchen, staring at the flour coating every surface and the two trays of “cookies” sitting on the counter. The vague smell of burnt batter was overpowered by the amount of powder still floating through the room. Every silent breath coming from the three sent the clouds of baking ingredients in swirls, causing each of them to cough as it entered their lungs.
The three could only stand there as they heard the front door to the house open, letting Champion and Hyrule in to see the mess before them.
They turned around sheepishly to see wide eyes and mouths agape at what the kitchen had turned into.
“Surprise?” Sky tried weakly, leading to laughter from Hyrule as Champion pulled at her locks, still not comprehending the mess laid before them.
~ ~ ~
After everyone else had returned to the upturned kitchen and frantic Champion, Malon led the charge in cleaning up the mess and preparing dinner. In almost no time, everything was back to normal, save the two pans of cookies that haunted everyone when they looked at them.
“Now, I thought I told y’all you didn’t need to divide the batter and that you’d work with it too much and cause problems when bakin’. An’ the rest of the recipe was simple, what happened?” Malon asked, forcing an inquisitive eye on the three.
Legend was the first to dare to speak up.
“There is a fine line between biscotti and batter. Unfortunately, we could not find it.”
Laughter filled the room, Malon’s firm look cracking. “Alright, alright. Why don’t y’all come into the dining room to eat. We didn’t go outta our way for y’all to not eat.”
The group all sat around the table, talking and laughing about their day as the sun set through the window, basking them all in a warm glow.