Chapter Text
Buggy sprawled out on the beach fuming. The other side of this island was where Shanks was camped out, had been since forever apparently. Mihawk went ahead to give Shanks the wanted poster and warn him that Buggy was with him... or whatever.
*WHATEVER*
He was supposed to wait for Mihawk to give him a signal to join them.
*A SigNAl*
The longer Buggy waited on the empty beach, the more he hated the idea. Why should he have to wait? Was Shanks suddenly some delicate princess who needed her hand held through every complicated conversation? No he wasn't, that's what.
He'd been waiting for an eternity, twenty two minutes at least. A life time, Buggy was sure he'd go grey before they even remembered he existed. What if they just left him here? What if they sailed away? OR what if they sat down to eat dinner or have a drink and got so distracted making moon eyes at each other that they completely forgot about good ole Buggy Bear the fair and completely reasonable!?
No, no way was he letting that happen, that was it. Buggy couldn't stand anymore waiting. He ran down the beach, heading in the generally correctish direction. On impulse He took a small short cut through the dunes. He only got tangled in vegetation three times... Gawd damn misbegotten dune vines trying to eat him.
Finally he struggled out of the bush with such determined force, momentum tossed him across the beach and landed him in a heap at Mihawk's feet. Perfect landing.
*Ten out of Ten Buggy ole boy*
Buggy blinked up at Mihawk, who being a better showman then one might immediately assume, blinked in sustained quiet amusement and then continued on unperturbed as if a pile of irate clown parts hadn't just stumbled into his proverbial lap.
Hawk eyes barely even paused, waving blandly at Buggy as if this had been the plan all along.
"- As I was saying Shanks, I came to tell you about your child friend, or nephew rather... adopted son? The boy's been making big moves for a brand spanking new pirate, quite passionate about it really. He might just have a chance at becoming king of the pirates after all... also as it's become somewhat obvious, Buggy would like a word"
To Shanks immediate credit he only looked worried about Buggy and Mihawk being together and possibly getting along for a split second before the well oiled machine of his charisma engaged. His voice always so soft and soothing.
"Bug... I'm so glad you're here..."
"Please Shanksy Wanksy, pudding pie, you sound so sincere... don't lie to me. I don't want-, I don't need that. That's not what the hell I'm here for."
Looking at him the way you looked at your sails right before a particularly bad storm was going to blow in, concern balanced with a particular kind of pragmatic need, Shanks deflated minutely
"Ok... then what... are you here for my friend?"
"Your... friend? Your FRIEND?! Good to know you still piss me off I guess... friend. No, you know what I'm not a teenager anymore. I won't be baited. You know, as a kid I never knew how insecure you were. You always made everything look so fuckin easy. Look... W-, we just need to talk, you and I."
Shanks closed his eyes, a sizzle of honey sweet pain passed over his otherwise serene face.
"Isn't that what we're doing? Talking?"
Buggy made a disgusted dismissive sound but didn't respond. Shanks nodded at the unspoken denial anyway. He took a deep complicated breath and started again.
"Ok, we can talk then... about whatever you want...need. Fuck Bug, I don't really know how to do this part, I always bailed before I had to learn. I-, yeah of course I was insecure. You always knew exactly who you were. From the time we were babies. I only ever knew who I wasn't. I was never gonna be the future king of the pirates, not like he wanted. You could've, maybe they didn't see it. I didn't have an excuse. I knew, I didn't even know how to tell them they picked the wrong orphan to carry their legacy. I was never gonna be your anchor. I knew everything I couldn't be, but had absolutely no idea what I could be, what I wanted to be"
Buggy gawped af Shanks
"The fuck?!"
"... You asked the question. Maybe the answer wasn't what you expected-"
Buggy relaxed, shaking his head, he fell back laughing.
"Oh, holy fuck, we are so fuckin dumb. We were just sad and dumb."
"Technically I think we were just young, inexperienced-"
Scoffing loudly, Buggy kicked Shanks in the leg.
"Speak for yourself Buckaroo, I was so fuckin stupid. Deeply and profoundly fuckin stupid. I'm talkin bone deep fuckin life alteringly fuckin dumb. I really thought you two had somethin figured out I didn't... Now that I know we were sharing a fast train to Nowhereville, I don't know what to do with that information"
"Ahh so reassuring. I feel reassured babe-"
"Ugh, don't call me Babe till after we've talked."
-
Mihawk watched the two men he'd spent most of his adult life loving in every imaginable way, as they reacquainted themselves. Privately he still thought he'd probably leave this island alone tomorrow, no matter what Buggy promised.
The sea and the storm, inevitable, inseparable, mercurial. Why wouldn't they choose each other? They were so colorful. He was monotone. Still no matter what he hoped or feared, they deserved the opportunity to talk privately. He didn't bother to excuse himself, that talk wasn't about or for him. Instead he snagged a few unattended bottles of beer and settled in the chaos of the two crews saying hello to each other. Might as well, he'd need a drink or five for whatever was coming tonight anyway.
Mihawk peered over his beer bottle at Buggy and Shanks. They were doing the thing they'd always done that used to make him so damn jealous. Having whole conversations in eye contact.
Buggy was furious and vibrating, Shanks was confused and fond. Neither of them said a single word just looking knowingly at each other. Mihawk, slugged his entire first beer, trying not to think about it and his impending solitude.
Something popped him in the forehead, which should be impossible. Only two people could get that close to him without alerting his extremely deadly battle reflexes.
Ahh Buggy then.
The rapping on his forehead got more insistent
*Bop bop bop plink*
Mihawk hadn't actually realized he'd closed his eyes, opening them again provided an up close and personal view of Buggy's disembodied left hand hovering in radiant judgment over his brow. From down the beach Buggy was jumping around, spinning bits of himself in theatrical aggravation.
"What are you doing Bird Brains?"
"... Giving you space to talk"
Sneering, Buggy recalled all his pieces, coming together with a decisive condescending snap.
"Giving us space to talk? I'm surrounded by idiots. Gods why did you curse me with this dumb ass taste in men? Dracule Mihawk I swear to everything I hold holy, to the fine art of clowning, If you don't get your ass over here I'll lose my gawdamn mind. This concerns you too, Mr to many Bats in the Belfry. I said no more bullshit I meant it"
Mihawk sighed, took his beers and walked back, it still felt like an impending death sentence. With Shanks it was easy to keep his emotional distance, to never really feel disappointed because he was never fully there. But Buggy made it impossible, he was always pulling you in, by hook or crook, or terrible attitude. He demanded you look at him, and Mihawk at least found it nearly impossible to look away.
He'd gotten overly comfortable with Buggy's incessant demands for more, now the impending loss of it felt, painful, cataclysmic. And yet...
*I really am in love with him*
Even now when his well manufactured apathy would make this infinitely easier, Mihawk couldn't bring himself to look away from either of them.
The storm and the sea, his two favorite siren songs, the entwined loves of his strange lonely life.
At least he wasn't alone, Shanks was clearly also confused. Buggy, now flopped back in the sand, just looked pissed. Strictly speaking Buggy always looked at least somewhat pissed.
When Mihawk got to them he did his best to look, to be unaffected by the way they held his foolish unhelpful heart in their mercurial hands. He was no longer a teenager he would be an adult about it, no tears or tantrums.
The sea and the storm could tear a ship to pieces. It was their nature.
Resigned, sadder than he anticipated, Mihawk settled opposite them in the sand, forming a haphazard conversational triangle.
"Yes Buggy, how might I help you?"
"Eww! No sad boy Mihawk, I rebuke you Satan. This is-, Shanks you broke him. How'd you break him already? Is he always like this with you? Jesus H high falootin Christ on a dingy in the desert. SHANKS"
Shanks smiled, confused, tentative, a thin line of resigned sadness, just the right amount of ingratiating
"Babe-, Buggy really, nothing happened. Mihawk and I have an understanding. I couldn't break what's not mine to break. I-"
Buggy sent a hand flying to clap over Shanks mouth.
"Oh hell no, I didn't come here for that either. No more bullshit. Why is that so hard? This is not an agreement Red, this is a kicked puppy. This is Un-GODdamn-NaturAL. This isn't an understanding, this is you teaching him by example that he's not allowed to have opinions about his own relationship or you'll evaporate like morning gawdamn dew. This is him loving you enough to know you need freedom more than you need people... even the ones you love. So listen Shanks, me and Birdy we're a thing now-"
A shadow of something crestfallen crossed Shanks' face, the sadness deepening the lines of his face, expanding the hollowness in his chest, the lack washed over him for a titanic second before his reflexes kicked in with an easy seeming smile.
Both Buggy and Mihawk knew better but Shanks couldn't help it. He'd been playing the part for so long it was hard to put down these days... and anyway he didn't own either of them. That was the point right? People weren't objects, you couldn't own them, shouldn't want to.
"Oh, I see, well that's your right-"
Buggy scoffed, kicking sand in Shanks direction unenthusiastically.
"Yeah yeah, that's my right, his too, but as usual Red you don't see anything. You didn't let me finish. You never do. As I was saying, Birdy and I are a thing now. It's different then it was with you... but it's good. It feels... quiet in all the jangly bits ya know?"
Shanks leaned back finally actually looking at this adult more mature Buggy, who was so similar and so different from the one he'd loved so deeply and so poorly so many years ago.
Buggy hadn't called him Red at least not to his face, in ages, the old nickname warmed something old and despondent inside him. Shanks smiled a small genuine smile
"Yeah actually, I do"
"Ok great. Well, whatever you and I-, Whatever you and I sort out today... That's not interfering with what Mihawk and I have now. And! And Shanksy baby you're not breaking up with him over me either-"
Mihawk was doing his best to not be entirely present in his body while they talked, having decided it wasn't really his business as such. He kept his amber gold eyes on the horizon. Watching fluffy white clouds chase each other over the mysterious deep blue green of the ocean
That statement got his attention though, Mihawk snapped Buggy and Shanks back into mental visual focus.
Buggy was tapping his foot in theatrical disapproving housewife mode.
"-No Shanks don't say anything you'll regret for once in your goddamn life. Listen to me you won't convince me otherwise so give it up, I've got your gawdamn number babe"
Shanks leaned even further back, taking a drink of his rum, already settling into the rhythm of Buggy and Shanks despite himself... forces of nature. The sky and the sea meeting on every horizon.
"Really Buggy, what's my number then?"
"Easy Reddy deady baby boy, it's 3."
They watched each other in otherworldly communion for a minute. A loud pointed conversation broadcast in oceans of silence. Shanks broke the connection first, laughing heartily.
"It can't possibly be that easy"
Buggy snorted
"It can, you lack imagination and style is all. It's fine, Birdy & I, we have more then enough between the two of us to make up for your lack"
Shanks huffed a dry surprised laugh at that, pointed his Rum bottle in Mihawk's direction.
"I assume you're on board with this three-way disaster...?"
Mihawk nodded thoughtful.
"I wasn't aware it's one he was considering. I suspect the surprise nature of the prize is also punishment as it were, taxes due for past indiscretions. I think... It's a decent strategy...I don't have a better one. We've all had our moments of foolishness over the years. Now? Yes, I believe I am. I think... it could work... maybe even well."
"It won't be easy despite his big ideas. Buggy always has big ideas, details though"
"Nothing worth doing is ever easy Shanks, you know that. Besides, I think you'll find our Buggy has grown into his big ideas"
"Yeah... I'm definitely seeing that... So Mihawk, I'm worth doing then?"
"You always have been, have you not?"
Swigging his rum again, Shanks waved between the three of them, loose and amused, more then a little surprised
*Shocked*
The only two men on earth that no amount of overpowered Observation Haki could completely prepare him for.
Shanks sighed into a smile, warmer now that he'd had a minute to process.
"Hmm and Blue too huh?"
Mihawk looked over at Buggy who coming near the end of his Internal script, was vacillating between irritated, hopeful, and unsure.
"I noticed him first that day you know. I never would've imagined I could have all this... But yes, Buggy too, but then, I suspect you already knew that"
Shanks laughed, nostalgic.
"That's true, I think in the beginning I wanted you just because you wanted him so bad. You were the only person I'd ever met who watched him with the intensity I did. We were two starving things at a feast. Maybe if I understood your hunger, I could understand mine"
Buggy sneered again, blushing a little despite himself.
"Gods you guys are disgusting. I hate you. I have the worst taste in men. Shanks only you would fall in love with someone so you could better understand you were in love with someone else."
Shanks smiled at him, genuinely easy in the late afternoon sun.
"Is that what it was?"
Buggy made a little disgusted sound in his throat.
"The pain I feel in my soul, knowing you mean that more then you wish you did. Yes Shanks that's what it was. When we desire, crave, long for physical and emotional intimacy from someone, it's because we have feelings for them"
For the first time since they arrived Shanks leaned forward, set his bottle of rum in the sand, and traced the line of Buggy's ankle with knowing fond fingertips.
"I like this new speaks his emotional mind Buggy. He feels more free"
Buggy slapped Shanks hand away, though it was playful not accusatory.
"Please, he's not new, you left asshole."
"Yeah I did"
For a while a quiet balance fell between them. This time Buggy stirred first, digging his fingers into the sand for the warm pressure of it on his hands.
".... Anyway, could one of you braid my hair before bed? .... Uh please or whatever ugh. Gross"
Shanks picked his bottle up again, back on emotional ground he understood.
"That will have to go to Mihawk and his two hands, though there are plenty of bed time rituals I'm more than capable of taking on."
Buggy watched Shanks for a minute more, then stood up, brushing sand off of him.
"Yeahhh, been back together for five minutes and I'm already looking forward to putting something in your mouth to shut you up"
Shanks laughed like they did when they were kids, golden in the sun.
"Me too Bug, me too"
A wave of emotions washed visibly over Buggy, he looked down the beach at the two crews, slowly working themselves into party mode.
"Ugh, you're both so fuckin sappy. What's a Clown to do? Ocean take me away. Okay, well... you guys need to talk now don't you? Bout damn time actually, decades over due. I swear if you two don't put down your fragile egos and actually talk it out... no orgasms for a month. Shanks I will park a hand in that stupid cloak of yours to make sure you don't go sniffing around elsewhere just to avoid your dumbass ass feelings. You already told me-"
Buggy set a gentle affectionate foot on Shanks knee, leaning into him.
"Now you just need to tell him Red. Doesn't he deserve to hear it after all this time? He's only been waiting forever..."
Buggy shoved himself back off of Shanks and jogged backwards down the beach, towards the crew's booming party bonfire. He waved at them both, making talking motions with both hands.
A comfortable silence settled between them for awhile. Eventually Mihawk reached across Shanks to pull the bottle of rum from his distracted fingers. He took a long pull then handed it back.
"We may as well talk. I'm finding, Buggy the Clown, as unlikely as it seems, is usually right."
Shanks laughed in complicated nostalgic agreement.
"Yeah, always kinda has been"
"... Shanks how come you never told me that the ditzy thing he does was an act?"
Watching Buggy down the beach, telling a story with animated gestures and a whole lot of screaming, Shanks took a swig of his rum, pressed the sun warm bottle against his cheek.
"It wasn't mine to tell.... and he was right. I was afraid. You two... Buggy was always the substance to my style. It felt like I'd lose you both if I didn't stand in between you. No one else ever saw anyone but Roger's rightful heir in me. I never wanted any of that though Hawk, not ever. I always knew it wouldn't be for me. I'd never care long enough to pull it off. If all I had was an unwanted legacy and nothing of either of you. As a teenager it sounded like a fate worse then death."
"He wouldn't have ever left you, or betrayed you, even when we were kids and all we had on our minds were swords and playing hero"
Shanks leaned into Mihawk just a little, willing his body to relax. This could be ok.
"I know that now, back then it felt impossible that I could deserve him... keep him. He was always so damn dazzling. Did you know he's actually pretty good with a sword?"
"I'd guessed as much"
"He used to hate it, thought swords were boring, he fought everything back then, like his soul was always just broiling away, seething. But he stuck with it, swords, no matter how much it tore him apart with tedium, because I loved them. Kept at it too. It wasn't until you'd been coming around long enough to be taking lessons with us that he quit. I think it was a relief for him honestly, not carrying the responsibility of being my rival slash partner in combat. It was never a thing he really cared about. Not really. Being able to trust you with that part of me. It mattered to him. To me it felt like he'd rather give all the pieces of me away then keep anything at all. To much trouble"
"If you were afraid of it, why did you leave when Luffy ate that damn gum gum fruit?"
"I could say I knew the shit was gonna hit the fan, and I did but. In the moment, leaving seemed better then being left. I thought, if I left he could come back and be with the kid again. He was always better with Ace and Luffy then I was. Then they wouldn't be alone and I didn't get left behind"
"Shanks everyone chooses you. Why would you think that...?"
"No everyone chooses Red Hair Shanks, Pirate Prince, honorary keeper of the pirate king's legacy. Buggy chose me, before I even knew who that was."
"Mmm I suppose that makes sense but Red, Garp has always hated Buggy's way of being. He's probably the reason you were handed the Roger Legacy. He's made a life time of hating pirate attitude, despite having raised children with the king of them"
"I think I never got the full extent of that hate, because I was good at the decorum he liked so much. I just never really believed he would take Luffy from the only family he'd ever known over something so petty."
"Well that was your first mistake, you underestimated the self loathing petty of a down low Marine Vice Admiral"
Shanks, huffed a sad laugh
"Maybe Buggy was right about that too, maybe I was dumb"
"Not dumb, overly generous with someone you considered family"
In the end Buggy was right, they needed this talk, and they really were a bunch of traumatized defensive disasters back then.
Mihawk settled a hand on Shanks' thigh, pressing strong knowledgeable fingers in one of the muscles he knew got tense sometimes from compensating for the shift in his center of gravity, rubbing out the knots, a life long comfortable habit.
"We really were foolish weren't we?"
Shanks grumbled in appreciation as the meandering massage hit a particularly tense and tender spot.
"Well in our past defense, we were a bunch of kids raised by legally downlow pirates. Not great emotional examples"
"I suppose that's true..."
They both watched Buggy down the beach, running around, playing with and entertaining the crews, completely content to just live and be as himself. Shanks sighed, letting himself lean into Mihawk, letting himself feel the pressing need to touch and feel and bask in Mihawk's attentions.
"He's right about the other thing too you know. I did fall in love with you too. I'm not good at it Hawk. I'm not like Bug, bursting with an infinite amount of love for the people around me. He's like a dragon who collects odd ducks and outsiders. That's not me, and I'm never gonna be anything but me. I'll get itchy in my bones, you'll wake up and I'll be gone again. I don't ever mean to, I never want to. I always think this'll be the time I can sit still... but you deserve to know. Saying it out loud won't change anything really. I can't... "
Mihawk leaned closer, pressing reassurance into every place they were touching, letting the massage go so he could pull Shanks by his well muscled thigh, even closer.
"I've never asked anything of you but that Red. I wouldn't want one of your so pretty false faces. I think if you can handle the reality of it. He and I will fare fine when you get a case of the itchy bones... together."
"When I was a kid I hated the idea I was always running away in fear of it. Now? Now I think knowing you're happy together, that I'm not failing you... I like that. It's a comforting sort of burn"
"Like Rum..."
"Like Rum... Do you think you'll marry him Hawk Eyes?"
"Maybe, if he wanted to I think I would."
"He will, want to I mean. He's never felt like he belongs anywhere. It matters to him, knowing he belongs, formally, officially, irrefutably. He'll want that if you'll give it to him. That stability I never could manage no matter how much I wished I could."
They sat content to take their time, watching the crews down the beach playing touch football with one of Buggy's feet of all things. Buggy was chasing after his lost foot in a casual playful loping feat of acrobatics neither of them could even begin to understand, Mihawk looked back to Shanks.
"Wouldn't you?"
"I-, I want to argue for the sake of my reputation at least. But yeah? Yeah, you can't marry someone when you're gone half the time though"
"Who says?"
"Common decency I think"
"Red Hair Shanks do not make me call you by your full given name. Please remember that I know it. What does common decency have to do with it? We're pirates. We do what we want"
"Ok ok true, then...yeah maybe, if he'd have me."
"Oh he'd have you, for the smugness alone, if nothing else... and like you said, the formal claim would matter to him"
"Gods, you're so mean to me"
"Someone has to be"
"What does it say about me that I'm in love with the only two people in the world that don't buy my charm at all ever? That's just masochism."
"Sounds smart to me, fairy tales are for children. Real life requires more then a happily ever after stamp and a cookie"
Shanks nodded in comfortable agreeable silence. Eventually he picked up his rum, thunking it repeatedly in the sand making a dull shushing heart beat in their ears.
"So we're really doing this huh?"
"Could hell itself tear you away now that it's been set on the table?"
"Not even every single admiral in the Marines."
Instead of answering directly, Mihawk stood with the grace of a natural predator. Even now half buzzed and overflowing with decades of emotions he moved like a murderous dancer. The casual hand he held out to Shanks was as steady and concrete as the sun.
"Shall we go heckle one of the smartest men we know? I'm sure it'll be fun."
Shanks handed Mihawk the Rum then surprised both of them by accepting the offering of a companionable hand up.
"Oooh living dangerously already Hawk Eyes, heckling makes him horny"
Mihawk leaned in, kissing Shanks light, on the scruff of his morning after stubble, his voice thick with possibilities
"I know..."
Shanks laughed again, a lifetime of emotional weight he'd never even realized he was carrying, sliding away into the sand, never to be bothered with again.
Things weren't fixed yet. There would be a lot of work involved in making things good for all of them but this was a start that was decades over due. Shanks smiled into the sun.
"Mmmmm in that case, I can think of so many ways to make him angry"
"Perfect. I can't wait, it's a date then"
They walked down the beach, not hand in hand, not yet, maybe not ever.
But they were together
And together sounded like the natural music of the sea.
Perfect.
--
Sometime later, days or weeks, no one here was counting, much to early in the morning, 2 pm at least, Alvida, Ritchie, and Mohji came tumbling into the tent they'd been sharing.
The three Buggy crew members did their level best to look away so as not to invade the privacy of the barely dressed and half asleep pile of captain and captain lateral pirates.
Mohji cleared his throat.
"Captains, Mister Mihawk Sir- Father-, uh no, Daddy? Ack! Your warlord Honor Sir, we're very sorry Sir. We answered your Transponder. It's been ringing forever. Ritchie couldn't sleep? Ben said it would be ok. That you probably wouldn't kill us. But uh, it's a good thing we did we think. It's important after all. Captains-, and uh Warlord Sir. There's been an incident with Ace."