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i thought i saw a pussy cat

Summary:

Four cats Punz encountered and one he kept.

Notes:

Merry Punzblr secret santa, Kasey!
(Yes, I'm significantly late. However, I did manage to post on Punz' birthday :D )

Work Text:

The first cat belongs to his sister. Luke is just past his tenth birthday when she brings it home; a tiny lady kitty in a tuxedo and spats. Her friend gives his sister the catwhen said friend discovers she can’t take it with her when moving. The cat’s name is Lily and Luke’s sister excitedly introduces her to their parents and the house. Luke is more into the idea of dogs, spending much of his time playing with his best friend who owns two, and since his sister is very serious about proper cat care, Lily spends most of her first month in his sister’s bedroom and adjoining bathroom. Aside from short encounters, it isn't until a full three weeks post-cat acquisition that Luke gets the opportunity for actual interaction.

Lily is very small for her age and has been spending most of her time investigating the best places for sun worship and peaceful overlooking of her new kingdom. She has particular pleasure in stretching her full twelve and a half inches out across the back of the living room couch in the full afternoon sun, directly where Luke likes to sit when catching SpongeBob reruns. Their brief tussle for couch dominance ends in Lily triumphantly perched in the sun surveying her domain and Luke, nursing a scratched hand, sitting warily on the opposite side of the couch.

It doesn’t get much better from there.

Lily has decided the house is hers and Luke wakes twice to a cat staring into his sleeping face before he begins to sleep with his bedroom door shut. She lurks on the second stair from the top directly in his path when he descends so he has to catch himself by the railing. She even crawls into his school backpack and leaves heavy claw marks in an assignment. Luke spends more time in the cold Massachusetts winter weather than he likes, avoiding Lily’s anarchy, until his sister steps in and starts a training regimen. It mostly involves the word ‘No!’ and a hefty amount of picking the cat up and moving her to a more appropriate place. Lily is smart and does pick up the training well, but Luke remains free game for her occasional terrorization sprees.

The cold he develops over the next few months is a peculiar one - it mostly presents itself in the mornings with itchy eyes and the occasional sneeze, clears up during the course of the day at school, and sometimes comes back in the evenings when he’s watching tv or doing homework. It gets better as soon as spring rolls around and Luke can spend more time outdoors, so he doesn't think much of it.

Over the next year he learns to keep delicate things - art projects, school essays, his Gameboy - either covered or in his room with the door shut. Lily slowly learns to tolerate his presence and her reign of terror lessens into a mutual respect, but the sneezing continues until Luke’s mother, concerned, takes him to the doctor and they learn he is one of the unfortunate ten percent of the population who is allergic to cats.

They hold a family consultation to see if Lily will remain, since no one wants Luke to develop any allergy complications, but the end result is that while her territory is reduced from areas Luke has to spend large amounts of time in, such as his room, Lily stays and Luke becomes well acquainted with allergy medication.

***

Punz is delighted and excited to be hanging out with the boys. The Banter session is hilarious to record, the streams are great, he gets to hold conversations with the Beast himself, and just existing in the same space as Noah, Karl, and Sapnap is so much fun that he can’t quite imagine leaving. Quackity shows up late and they spend hours just talking and existing together - there’s plans for content they can make later, including car theft, competitions, and ,. Noah takes them all on a tour of the house he’s finalizing the rental on, and all in all, Punz is having the time of his life.
Everything’s coming up daisies, except Buffy.

Buffy is a beautiful, thick-furred, orange tabby that Karl is babysitting, universally adored both by Karl and the internet. She is introduced the day they arrive and when they take their ‘in North Carolina’ announcement photo, she is in the centre, accepting the many hands petting her.

She also sheds in an absolutely horrific way.

Punz and Foolish have an AirBnb they can go to, but more often than not, they find themselves falling asleep on Karl’s couch post-movie or -show marathon. One of their first nights doing so finds Punz sneezing himself awake at 4am. Foolish is sniffling next to him and Buffy is curled up on his chest, her thick fur directly in his face. As Punz sits up groggily, arm over his helpless nose, Foolish cracks his eyes open.

    ‘I’m in hell,’ Punz croaks when the sneezing finally lets up. Foolish has flicked the lightswitch and, in the glow of the room lights, his reddening eyes are visible proof of the affliction they’re currently sharing.

Recovery includes thorough showers and intense cat hair brushing, as well as a reluctant Buffy forced to sleep in Karl’s room for the remainder of their stay. While neither Punz nor Foolish make a tremendous effort to stay out of her way, they are certainly more cautious.

***

Andi is somewhat apologetic during her phone call. Normally she would simply drop Zuko at her mother’s house, where he would be indulged like a grandson, but this time her mother will be in an entirely different state. She offers Punz all the Claritin he could need and there’s a note of desperation in her voice that leads him to agree. The boys drop him off at the apartment only an hour before Zuko’s cat carrier arrives in his kitchen, scarcely enough time to process the introduction of one of his greatest allergens to his house - he can only hope this new cat will be less fluffy than Buffy.

Zuko, however, is a majestic grey and white creature who spends his first two hours in the apartment surveying his new domain with a kingly air, investigating all the interesting smells and sights, and eventually deciding the strip of sunlight flooding across the floor of the mostly-empty living room is his new napping area. Punz is tired after the long car ride and leaves the cat to explore while he takes a long and well-deserved nap.

To Punz’s surprise and pleasure, Zuko is an incredibly well-behaved and gentle cat. There is no unexpected hair in his nose when waking, no ransacking of personal belongings or destruction of property, and he behaves after the manner of a dignified and stately ruler. During his first stream after returning Zuko curls up on the empty chair beside him tucks his little paws over his nose, and falls asleep during the entire four-hour stream, only briefly waking to show chat his adorable face when Punz rearranges part of the setup for the Zuko cam. Most of the streams over the next three weeks continue in the same fashion. Zuko is very interested in everything Punz does, whether it be making coffee in the morning or showering at night, loves climbing into Punz’ lap when he's sitting and rolling over to display a beautifully soft white tummy, sprawling across his desk in a lordly manner when Punz is preparing to stream - and Punz, for one of the first times in his life finds he actually looks forward to interacting with a cat. The Claritin definitely helps with this.

It's with a sad heart that Punz reluctantly watches Andi reunite with her pet on her return. He misses Zuko immediately and exacts a promise from Andi for regular cat snaps.

***

The dransion is even larger than Punz expected, based on descriptions - he pulls up in front and marvels at the sheer size of the place. Sapnap is already heading out the front door toward his car, grin excited and welcoming, and Punz shakes his head to clear it and moves to unbuckle.

The entry of the house is almost as large as Punz’ living room and kitchen combined. Under Sapnap’s guidance, Punz lugs his duffle toward the stairs, only to be stopped when Dream, watching sports on the frankly gigantic tv he can see around the corner of the kitchen, calls out to them. He’s seated on the couch, Patches perched gingerly across his legs, and apologizes for not getting up.
    ‘The princess is picky,’ he says. ‘Good to see you, man.’
Sapnap cautiously rubs a finger behind Patches’ ear and turns back to Punz.
    ‘Lemme show you your room before they suck you in,’ he says and starts up the stairs. ‘Hannah’s out right now but I think he said she'd be back around five, and Foolish is landing tonight.’

By the time Punz has dropped his bag in the guest room and headed back down, Patches has removed her dignified self from Dream’s knee and seated on a sunny living room windowsill, washing her face, allowing Dream to greet him with a backslapping hug and take him on a mini-tour of the house.

Patches winds her way around Punz’ legs while he drinks a beer and watches the sun go down. The barbeque only smells slightly singed because their conversation keeps distracting Dream and keeping him from checking things aren’t burning and the initially incredibly loud cicadas have either calmed down or they’ve just gotten used to the volume. She’s timid, shying away from his outstretched hand when he bent to greet her and only allowing brief touches to her tiny head, but she’s also as curious as a monkey and refuses to leave the patio, instead moving from person to person, sniffing their pants or legs, leaping up to the outdoor table and getting gently but firmly removed by George, and generally poking her tiny pink nose into everything. It’s precious.

He brings Cate over the next time and she spends most of the time sitting with Patches, half-listening to the conversations around her, attention focussed on the gently purring creature. Punz gets a sneaking suspicion that his life is about to change, a suspicion confirmed when a large portion of the drive home involves Cate talking about Patches and then quietly browsing on her phone. A glance shows she’s looking at animal shelters.

***

The shelter assistant handles the cat very gently as she leads them into a fair-sized comfortable room to ‘get acquainted.’
    ‘I know the tag said ‘Lily,’ she says as she places the cat down, ‘but he’s actually a male. Surrendered because the owner had flooding issues and couldn’t house him anymore.’
Cate is already on her knees, hand outstretched and letting the cat sniff her curiously. He’s as relaxed as he was in the kennel, letting her rub around his ears and twisting his head to follow her hand before flopping over and showing his entire belly, purring loudly. Cate smiles up at him.
    ‘I want him,’ she says confidently. ‘He’s adorable, look how happy he is!’

But first they change his name to Alluka. No reminders of childhood tormentors permitted.