Chapter Text
If any of the awkward tension of the wedding had resolved with Seiji and Nicholas' intimate relations of the morning, they soon returned when it was time to bathe.
"You go first," Seiji blurts out, just as Nicholas opens his mouth to say something, anything as ridiculous as the idea of them bathing together. Seiji saves himself the headache this way.
Nicholas nods, and almost seems a little surprised when Seiji faces away from him, carefully lowering himself into the tub. It doesn't matter that they've seen each other naked and then some, Seiji still feels like he owes his new husband some privacy.
Once they're both bathed and dressed, a servant appears at the door with breakfast. Seiji is immensely thankful that he doesn't have to greet the rest of the family right now. He knows he's a Coste now, or a Katayama-Coste at least, but he's not quite ready to live it.
There's a small table and sofa in the room, and he and Nicholas sit on opposite ends of it, quietly picking fruit off the tray.
"What's the villa like?" he asks, making the minimal effort of conversation. "Have you been there?"
"Oh, yes," says Nicholas, a beautiful smile warming his face like dawn. "A few weeks after my father took me in, the family went for a visit. It's really beautiful and quiet out in the country, and I imagine even better now that the weather is warmer."
Seiji nods. "I hope so."
They sit there silently for a few more minutes, and Seiji is surprised Nicholas doesn't have much to say, given how the past few times they've spent in each others' company, he's usually the one talking, giving some story or asking Seiji questions.
Cazzo. This situation has gotten so complicated, he's not sure what the rest of their married life will be like, exactly, if it will be this awkward. He hopes he might get some good sex out of it, at least.
"Well," says Seiji, shifting in his seat anxiously, "we should get going soon."
Nicholas glances to the tray in front of them, something troubled in his expression. "You've hardly eaten anything."
Seiji notices he's right, that all he's had is a few grapes. "It's just not what I normally eat for breakfast." Seeing Nicholas frown, he picks up some bread and tears off a small piece and eats it. "It's fine, really."
Nicholas watches him, but doesn't press further.
***
When they arrive downstairs in the entryway, Robert is the first one to see them, a glowing expression on his face.
"There they are, the lucky couple!" He puts a hand one of each of their shoulders. "I trust you slept well?"
Seiji tries to ignore the wink he gives Nicholas. Nicholas seems unbothered by it, his face very still.
"Yes, father," he says, and then he places a hand on Seiji's arm, one so warm and tender Seiji nearly jumps, and says in an unnecessarily soft voice, "I'm going to check on the horses."
Seiji watches him disappear down the corridor, feeling his own self uselessly rooted to the spot.
"Well, anyway," says Robert, turning to him, "There's someone here to see you."
Seiji's jaw falls open a hair. "Me? There's someone here to see me?"
"Yes!"
He follows Robert as the man cheerfully leads him into the receiving chambers, and there, standing with a bored expression on their face, is Yoshimi.
"Oh, hi," Seiji greets them, and Robert leaves them both.
"Hey," they say, flashing a humorless smile. "How are you doing?"
"I'm well," he answers automatically, and then adds, "Well, as well as I can be doing in these circumstances."
Their expression remains unchanged. "Great. Listen, I was just thinking, since I'm headed back to France, and since you and your husband" (and Seiji could not get used to the phrase your husband) "are headed along the road that way towards the villa, I was wondering--Merde, this sounds sounds as ridiculous as when she suggested it. Listen, mother wants me to accompany you on your journey to the countryside. Something about keeping an eye on you, and I told her that you're a grown man, you can look after yourself, but she doesn't seem to agree with me. So just tell me to go away, and I'll leave, alright?"
Seiji stares back at them, dumbfounded. He could believe his mother would try to send someone to look after him, and he certainly didn't need any help making a mere day's journey, but he thinks of this morning, lying awkwardly next to Nicholas, the thought of them sitting next to each other, alone, for the entire ride up to the villa, and--
"You can come along," he says.
They almost weren't listening, distracted by a loose thread on their shirt sleeve. "What?" they say, looking up at him in surprise. For a moment, they study him with their dark brown eyes, a serious expression on their brow. "Are you sure?"
With no one around to witness, he gives them a pleading expression. "Yes. Could you, Yoshimi? It's only a day."
They look at him and take a deep breath. "Alright, brother. If that's what you want."
***
The carriage is hooked up, horses idly lifting their hooves against the cobblestone street. Nicholas is hanging from the open door, smiling as Seiji approaches.
"There you are! Are you ready to go?"
Seiji glances back to him, face feeling hot in a sudden bout of shyness. He glances over to where, behind the carriage, Yoshimi sits mounted on their piebald, telling their squire where to pack their belongings.
"Um, I think I'm going to ride outside with my sibling, if that's alright."
Nicholas' face falls to an empty expression that Seiji could almost account for disappointment. Almost. But the man doesn't argue.
"Oh," he says. "Sure, whatever you wish."
Seiji nods his head, and Nicholas disappears into the carriage.
Yoshimi lifts an eyebrow when Seiji appears beside them on his horse.
"Should I even ask?"
"Let's just get out of here," he replies, not even looking at them, keeping his gaze forward.
***
They're just out of the city on a quieter country road, the warm sun on his shoulders as Seiji saunters along. Then, Yoshimi remarks pointedly,
"I would have thought that after your wedding night, you would be too sore to ride."
"I'm fine," Seiji replies curtly, and then closes his eyes in a pained expression. He doesn't even want to know how Yoshimi is side-eyeing him now. Maybe asking them to come along was a bad idea.
"You do like him, don't you?" they ask in Japanese. The servants around won't understand, and Seiji prays that Nicholas can't overhear them.
"Yes."
They snort a laugh. "I see. But you prefer ladies?"
Seiji grows bright red. They've known about his preference for men ever since his hopeless crush on their shared primary school tutor. "Enough, Yoshimi."
"You're saving yourself, then? For what? You don't want to ruin his--" they say the Latin word, "virtus."
"I don't think that means what you think it does."
"I think I do. I think he has plenty of virtus, and you know it."
Seiji grips the reigns of his gelding, feeling quite flustered. "We have shared some already."
"Shared what, Seiji?" they reply in mock innocence, and upon seeing his perceptible frown, they grin back at him. "Well, good. that's a relief."
Seiji gives a nod, focusing on the road ahead, hoping they won't try to make much further conversation.
***
The sky is dimming to a grey-blue when they reach of the top of a small winding road, leading to the gentle sloping red roofs of the Villa Coste. Candles flicker from inside the windows, the house already set up with servants. As they approach closer, Seiji notices how sizeable it is, same as anything touched by the Coste family fortune.
They reach the outer courtyard, and a man appears to open the carriage door and assist Nicholas down with care. The man peers inside the dark booth of the carriage.
"But where is your husband?" he asks. He looks to be about middle aged, in dark clothing, likely the steward of the property.
"Oh," says Nicholas, eyes blinking wide, and no sooner has he looked over at Seiji does his new husband ride towards them and dismount from his horse.
"That's me," says Seiji, giving a bow of the head. "I was in desperate need of some country air" (been working on that excuse most of the way up) "and decided to ride on my own." He gives the man a polite smile.
"Very well, Sir. Dinner has been prepared inside."
"Thank you, Dmytro," Nicholas tells the middle-aged man, and he bows his head and disappears inside.
Nicholas turns to Seiji, some word hanging on his lips, but he doesn't seem to make it out. Before he can, however, Yoshimi appears beside them.
"Well, Seiji, it was good to see you. And Nicholas," they place a hand on his shoulder. "It is an honor to meet you. I wish you both the best."
"You're not leaving, are you?" Seiji says, a sudden panic hitting him.
They glance up at him to reveal a patient, neutral expression. "Yes, Seiji."
"But you must be starving," says Seiji. "We've been traveling all day. Come eat with us, dinner is already prepared."
The way they look at him, he wonders if after all their time in France, they still understand Italian. "You want me to join you," they say flatly. "For your honeymoon dinner."
When they put it this way, it does sound silly. Seiji glances nervously to Nicholas, wondering how he's going to explain this, but to his surprise, Nicholas just smiles warmly at his sibling.
"It's no trouble for you to join us," he says. "Seiji seems to think highly of you, it would be my honor to get to know you a bit before you depart to France."
Seiji hides his immense sigh of relief. Yoshimi just glances back at their brother with a quiet disbelief that they're too polite to voice.
They turn to Nicholas and bow their head. "Very well. In that case, I am honored to be your dinner guest."
***
As they enter the dining room, Seiji notices the long table has been set for two, a grand display of flowers and ribbons tied to two chairs. Nicholas catches Dmytro by the elbow and quietly informs him,
"Sira Katayama is joining us. Could you bring out another place setting?"
The man looks to Yoshimi, whose expression is purposefully unreadable, nods, and disappears into the kitchens.
The servants work quickly and soon, Seiji finds himself seated between his new husband and Yoshimi, letting them make conversation so he can bury himself in the freshly cooked venison.
"So what's France like?" Nicholas asks, somewhere in between politeness and seeming genuinely interested. Seiji finds his cordiality something admirable. "Have you lived there long?"
"A few years," says Yoshimi, gulping down a sip of wine. "It's not as warm as Italy, but there's much to do."
"That's interesting!" Nicholas says, "Seiji told me it's not much different than here."
"Is that so?" They turn to him with a vaguely quizzical expression. "You seemed to like it when we were kids. Perhaps you were too young to remember."
Seiji is surprised Nicholas has remembered anything he's told him at all. Now, he turns to Yoshimi, finishing one bite, remarking, "I remember. Father took us to that sweets shop."
"That's right," they say with a wistful smile. "Father had a hard time dragging you out of there. He wanted to try everything," they inform Nicholas, who finds this information more amusing than Seiji would like.
"Anyway," they say, wiping their face on a cloth napkin, "This has been lovely, but I think I should head out--"
"You're going already?" Seiji turns to them, frowning.
They glance to him wordlessly, and then to Nicholas.
"It has been nice to meet you," the other man says with a warm smile, but makes no obvious effort to keep them.
"You as well," they reply with a polite nod. "Seiji, can I speak to you outside for a moment?"
"What about?" he asks, but they're already getting up from their chair.
"Come, brother, it won't be long."
Seiji knows this can't be good, but nonetheless, he stands from his chair and follows them.
Once they're outside in the corridor, and the door creates a sound barrier between them and Nicholas in the next room, Yoshimi turns to him with arms folded.
"What are you doing?" they ask, sounding disappointed and impatient.
"What do you mean?" he replies innocently, although he can already feel the guilt seeping in. "I haven't seen you in ages. Can you blame me for wanting some time to catch up with you--"
"That's not what this is about, and you know it."
Seiji closes his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Things are fine between me and Nicholas. Stop worrying."
Yoshimi lifts an eyebrow. "Good. So I can leave, then?"
"No," Seiji pleads. "Um, can't you stay the night? It's too dark to travel anyway."
"Seiji," they say, sounding tired, "you already told me you like him. That's apparent. And he likes you. What exactly is the problem?"
He does not like me, Seiji thinks to himself. "I don't know. It's just, I don't think he wants to be spending time with me? He probably has better things to do."
"Better things to--" they stop themself, looking like Seiji is really testing their patience. They take a deep breath and place a hand on his shoulder. "Seiji, it's going to be fine. You'll figure it out."
Seiji just stands there, unsure how to explain to them what a mess he's gotten into.
"Well," they say, "I'm heading out. Tell your husband he's been an exceptional host, but I'm eager to start on my journey."
They begin to walk down the walkway, but Seiji hurries after them. "Now? This late at night?"
"It's not too far to the nearest town. I'll rent a room at the inn."
"But why? I'm sure it's perfectly fine for you to stay here."
At this, Yoshimi stops for a moment, turns to Seiji, and says, "Brother, as grand as this villa is, even the farthest guest room from yours will not be far enough tonight. Goodbye." And with that, they stride off, leaving him alone to figure out how the hell he's going to return to his husband.
You'll figure it out. Seiji doesn't believe this for a second. He already knows he's doomed.
***
Seiji has to work himself up to returning to the dining room. But he does it; he's made it this far, anyway. Nicholas looks up to him with wide eyes, setting down his fork.
"What happened?" he asks as Seiji returns to sitting beside him.
"They left," he says simply.
"I...see."
And then, to fill the awkward silence that ensues, Seiji adds, his gaze firmly in front of him. "I think they want us to have some alone time together."
"Right."
So Nicholas is aware of the situation, too. But before Seiji can say anything, his new husband is rising from his chair.
"I understand, Seiji. You don't want to spend time with me, I get it."
"What?" Seiji turns his head.
"It's alright," Nicholas replies, sounding quite serious. "It's like we agreed upon. I'll leave you alone now; I was finished eating, anyway."
Seiji watches as he walks away, but can't bring himself to call after him. Nicholas is right, this is just as they agreed.
But why does he feel like something awful is weighing down his chest?
***
When Seiji's finished eating, and he had had very little appetite after that, he doesn't go to his shared chamber with Nicholas. Instead, he wanders the empty halls, giving a polite nod on the couple times he runs across a servant. He reaches the end of a corridor and finds himself in some unused bedroom, with cloths still covering the furniture. A pair of doors open onto a balcony, and he steps outside into the cool night air.
The moon must be out, but he can't see it. It's hidden behind clouds. In the darkness, he looks out over the valley, deep, green hills that he feel like might swallow him whole if he stares too long.
He turns and sits on the ground, feeling the cold stone against him. What have I gotten myself into? he wonders, cradling his knees. Where am I? Is this what my life is to be like for the rest of eternity?
Before he realizes it, he feels something wet on his cheek, something he hasn't felt in years. Seiji would die before crying in front of anyone, even his own mother. But now, it seems he can't help it.
There's no one around. He takes a shaky breath in, and suddenly he's sobbing, long wet tears that don't seem to have an end or a beginning.
He doesn't know how long he sits like that. Eventually, someone finds him.
"Seiji? Are you there?"
He lifts his head at the sound of the young, boyish voice. Bobby. He had forgotten that his squire had accompanied them along the journey. Quickly, he pulls himself to his feet, soaking up what tears remain with his shirtsleeve.
"I'm here," he calls back. Thankfully, he doesn't sound too choked up.
"There you are!" says Bobby, appearing with a small oil lamp as a light source. "The other servants here said you disappeared after dinner, but that you don't know where your room is."
This is true. And Seiji hadn't made any effort to find it, in fact, he was making sure he didn't find it, wandering down a wing of the villa that didn't seem in use. "Yes, I was just...wandering to clear my thoughts."
"Of course, sir," Bobby replies, as though this were a natural thing for Seiji to do. Perhaps it was. "If you're ready, I can help you find your room? Your husband has already retired for the night."
Seiji considers the possibility of staying out further, but it's probably best if he returns to his husband. They need to keep up the appearance of a happy marriage, after all. He's not sure if Bobby has seen him cry, but either way, he can't let his image fall further. He straightens up his posture and replies, "Alright, take me to him."
***
Bobby shows him to his and Nicholas' suite, and thankfully, doesn't ask any questions along the way. Seiji bids his squire goodnight and quietly shuts the door behind him.
The bedroom is beautiful, a spacious room with glossy tile floors and vaulted ceilings, long velvet curtains dressing tall windows and doors that open up to a balcony overlooking the garden.
Seiji approaches the bed, and sees Nicholas is already lying asleep, facing away from the door. He doesn't seem to have stirred upon Seiji's entrance to the room. Something in Seiji's heart stills to see him lying there, peacefully.
See? he thinks to himself. This is why this can't work.
Regardless of his inner voice, Seiji swallows it back and begins to undress, finding his place on the mattress beside his husband. The bed is big, plenty of space so that they need not even touch. Rolling away from Nicholas and gently tugging the covers over his shoulder, he wills himself to fall asleep.
***
Morning comes sooner than he realizes, sharp rosy-pink sunlight piercing his vision. He lifts his head, a few hairs plastered to his cheek. Had he really been so sound asleep?
Before he's really awake enough to process it, he's shifting his body to turn and look at Nicholas. But instead, he's faced with empty bedsheets. His eyes open wide.
Seiji sits up. The room is empty, save but for himself. Nicholas is gone.
Finding his trunk had been delivered to the room, he dresses himself, and heads downstairs to the dining room.
A handful of servants are already bustling about, one of them setting out a plate for him.
"Good morning sir," says an austere voice, and he finds the steward, Dmytro, standing beside him. "I hope the lodgings are to your liking, and that you slept well?"
"Yes, very well," says Seiji, and then adds, "Thank you."
"I am pleased to hear it. Sir Nicholas gave very specific instructions as to your breakfast, so I hope you might be hungry."
Seiji turns to him, having no idea what he could mean by that. "Alright?"
He sits down, and a servant brings out his usual breakfast of spinach and anchovies. Another brings a steaming pot with tea.
"You'll have to forgive me, sir," explains Dmytro. "This was all the tea we had on hand. I'm sure the Katayama family's tea collection is far more extensive."
The Costes kept tea in their kitchens? Perhaps their families had been making more efforts to prepare for this marriage than he was previously aware.
"It's alright," Seiji answers him, already inhaling the familiar aroma. "This is quite suitable. Where is Nicholas, by the way?"
If Dmytro is surprised by this, he doesn't show it. "He went for a ride, sir. I'm sure he'll be back soon."
Seiji nods, and thankfully, Dmytro leaves him to have his breakfast in peace.
***
The breakfast does calm him, somehow--a small, familiar piece of home for a man in a strange villa full of strange people and his elusive new husband. He considers finding some way to spend his idle time until Nicholas gets back, when inevitably, they will share another awkward meal together. But a curiosity gnaws at him.
"Sometimes I just want to ignore everything else and get on my horse."
He finds Dmytro to ask where Nicholas might have gone.
***
Outside, the sky is overcast. Bobby helps him mount, as is his job, but Seiji is quick to dismiss him after.
"Would you like me to watch for your return, sir?" he asks Seiji, knowing the man's preference to care for his own horse after a ride.
"No need," he tells Bobby. "Thank you."
The squire bows his head and takes his leave.
Seiji rides along the winding country road, just as Dmytro described. He soon finds himself surrounded by lush, green trees with budding new leaves. He's lost in the serene beauty of the forest before he realizes he's not sure how long he's been riding. He feels calmer now, anyhow.
And then, he comes upon a clearing.
Nicholas' horse is hitched to a beech tree near the edge of the woods. Seiji dismounts and does the same.
Seiji walks forward into the clearing, feet padding over soft grass. In the center, Nicholas sits on a low rock, facing away from him. When he reaches the other man, Seiji stands a few feet behind him, and calls to him.
"Nicholas."
He doesn't stir. Seiji wonders if this is perhaps another dream, but he calls out again, and suddenly Nicholas straightens his posture, looking around in surprise before turning to face his husband.
"Oh. Hello," he says quietly. The world around them is as quiet as it's ever been.
"Good morning," says Seiji, although it must be noon by now.
"I hope you don't mind that I left, earlier," says Nicholas. "I like to come out here to think."
"I can see that." Perhaps Seiji should feel fear upon seeing his new husband, as he had done the past day. But instead, he feels like his energy is replenished at the sight of him. There's a dry patch on the ground near him, and Seiji sits down on it. "Thank you for breakfast."
"Oh." A humorless smile spreads across Nicholas' lips for a brief time. "That's good. I thought you shouldn't have to change everything about yourself just because you're a Coste now."
Something about this pains Seiji. He looks to Nicholas and asks, in a moment of realization, "Is that what you had to do?"
Nicholas looks to him and lets out a dry laugh. "Yeah, something of the sort."
Seiji frowns. Four months ago, neither of them had more than a little to do with the Costes, and now, here they were, honeymooning at the family villa.
"I'm sorry about the," Seiji wonders how to best phrase it, "confusion, last night. I don't want--we should be able to get along, you know? We don't have to be strangers to each other."
"I suppose that's true," says Nicholas. He takes a deep breath. "I want--" the man begins, but he stops himself, as though unsure how to tread further.
"To be friends?" Seiji supplies.
Nicholas turns to him, a calm surprise resting on his face. "Yes. I would like that."
Seiji smiles back. "Good. Even if the house is big enough for us to keep to ourselves, I would hope we can share each other's company from time to time."
"Me, too." Nicholas doesn't look at him as he says it, instead, focused on turning a blade of grass in between his fingers.
They sit there a moment longer, the warm gray sky blanketing over them, when Nicholas rises. "Are you ready to head back?"
"Sure," says Seiji, and he pulls himself to his feet.
He's following Nicholas back to the horses, neither of them speaking, and Seiji finds himself intently focused on the handsome shape of the back of Nicholas' neck. He doesn't notice a little tree root sticking above the earth until it's caught his foot.
Seiji stumbles forward, arms spread out to stable himself, and manages, accidentally, to tackle Nicholas to the ground.
"Ah!"
A sigh of air presses out of the other man's chest as he hits the ground. Seiji rests on top of him, near immobile in shock, when the other man manages, in a strained voice,
"You seem to have a habit of falling on top of me."
Seiji looks down at him, feeling the warm mass beneath him that is Nicholas, and a wild thought runs through his mind. He seizes the opportunity before he can regret it, rolling onto his back and pulling Nicholas on top of him.
"How about now?" he tells Nicholas, a slight smile stretching the corners of his lips.
Nicholas stares back at him, mouth parted as he rests on his elbows looking down at Seiji. His soft brown eyes gaze into him, deepening, and Seiji can feel the other man's warm, sweet breath on his lips.
He looks up at him, trying to parse that expression. He's reminded of their wedding night, Nicholas hovering over him as he had undressed him, how badly Seiji wanted to--
He does it. Feeling brave, Seiji takes Nicholas by the collar, pulls him down and kisses him.
The other man stiffens slightly at first, but then, he melts at Seiji's touch, a hand pressing tenderly into Seiji's shoulder. He closes his eyes, his wet mouth opening so Seiji can meet him, and suck gently against his lower lip. Kissing Nicholas is everything he imagined and more, compared to that stupid wet dream he had where he gotten off on the thought of kissing Nicholas alone.
And then, as quickly as it started, gray light floods his vision, and he finds himself staring up at the wide, clouded expanse of sky.
Nicholas sits a few feet away from him in the grass, facing away, and breathing heavily.
"We shouldn't," he says, his voice hoarse. "We shouldn't do that."
Seiji sits up feeling like the ground has opened up beneath him. He remembers back to Nicholas, sitting on the other side of the bed, Nicholas, turning away from him at the altar, unsure if he should even put the ring on his finger.
"Why not?" he asks.
"We made a promise to each other to fake this marriage. We just said we would be friends. I don't want things to get complicated. We shouldn't even, we shouldn't touch."
"But what about yesterday?" Seiji ventures, and then adds, in case it wasn't clear, "In the morning, I mean."
"I remember," replies Nicholas with surety. And then he adds gravely, "I'm beginning to think that was a mistake."
Seiji watches him, his own heart aching. After some time, he asks, "Do you hate me?"
"Hate you? No, I--" and here, Nicholas lets out a strange laugh, "No. It's worse than that."
Seiji frowns. He remembers back to what Jesse had said to him, that which he still thought must be a lie. Besotted. "You know what Jesse told me, he..."
He stops himself. The idea is ridiculous.
Nicholas turns slowly, meeting his gaze. "What did my brother tell you?"
There's no way Seiji can admit the truth. His brain searches for something else, anything Jesse told him so that he won't have to lie. "He said that you never take his advice."
Nicholas exhales slightly. "He's right about that."
A drop of rain falls from the sky. Seiji is the first one to speak again.
"We should probably get going."
Nicholas gives a nod.
Seiji pulls himself to his feet. He thinks to offer Nicholas a hand, but is reminded they shouldn't be touching, and withdraws it. Nicholas stands up of his own accord.
Wordlessly, they walk side by side, returning to the horses as a light rain begins to fall.
***
It's pouring as Seiji returns to the villa with Nicholas. They find shelter in the stables, both of them soaked through their clothes, and dismount. When it appears that no one is waiting for them, Seiji remembers that he told Bobby he would tend to his own horse upon his return.
When his horse is situated, he finds Nicholas next to his own horse, hanging the saddle on the wall. The man's damp brown hair clings to his forehead, and his breath is visible in the cool air. The air smells of wet straw and stone.
He's in love with you, a voice tells him. Not the memory of Jesse's, but his own conscience. He's not sure what has compelled him to this conclusion, and it shocks him. He stands there helplessly as Nicholas picks up a brush to remove a tangle from his horse's mane.
"I'll meet you inside," the man says without looking up. "There's no need to wait here for me in the cold--"
"I'm in love with you," says Seiji. The words out themselves somehow, if not from his own sheer willingness not to let them fall apart again. If they're to suffer together, Nicholas should at least know why.
Nicholas looks back to him, eyes wide. "What was that--what do you mean?"
If Seiji's dug his own grave, he might as well lie in it. "I'm in love with you," he repeats, this time sounding sure of himself, jumping into that earthen hole. "I think have been for some time, now."
Nicholas looks to him as though he's just told him that his hair is on fire. And then, he walks right up to Seiji and kisses him.
Feeling a rush of endorphins, Seiji kisses him back fervently, tugging at the arms of his shirtsleeves. Before he realizes what's happening, he feels himself being pushed back against the stone wall behind him, with Nicholas' glorious warm body pressed against him, kissing him like he's the first water the man's had to drink in days.
Their breaths intermingle between them, and he revels in the feeling. Seiji can feel something poking into his left thigh, and he cups Nicholas' chin in his mouth, giving it another gentle kiss.
"Please," he breathes, and he should feel embarrassed at how desperate he sounds, but he doesn't. Nicholas follows his gaze, eyes willing. "Can we go back to our room?"
***
The two of them hurry through the corridors of the villa, boots making squelching noises, leaving little puddles on the tile as they walk. When they reach the room, Nicholas throws the door shut behind them with a loud thud, and Seiji hungrily pulls him in for another kiss. Outside, pouring rain beats against the windows.
It takes some effort to peel their wet, clingy layers off their skin, and when they're both shirtless, Seiji stopping to admire the other man's form, Nicholas takes his shoulders and asks,
"What do you want?"
Seiji kisses him again. The sound of the storm rages outside. "I want you to fuck me," he breathes.
Somehow, Nicholas' eyes are wide as though he still can't believe where they are, and to show him he's serious, Seiji presses a thigh against the other man's erection. Nicholas lets out a moan.
"Cazzo, okay." He laughs under his breath, fingers pressing into Seiji's sides. "Okay, I'm going to fuck you."
Seiji responds with another kiss, and Nicholas kisses him back, the two of them staggering backwards towards the bed.
Seiji tears the covers back, and lets Nicholas push him down, his heart racing this time as Nicholas picks up one of his boots and tugs it off his foot. His own erection is already straining against the confines of his trousers, and it throbs as Nicholas lifts his other foot.
Both of his boots removed and tossed aside, they set to removing his trousers, which is a struggle as the wet fabric clings to his skin. They manage to inch it over the curve of his ass, and his hard cock springs free. Nicholas breathes out a laugh, and then pulls roughly, finally ripping the pants off of him--Seiji isn't sure if they're still intact or not. He doesn't care. He just looks up at Nicholas, feeling a warm sweat already trailing down his back.
Nicholas leans in, placing a hand on his cheek, gently moving a wet strand of hair behind Seiji's ear. Seiji replaces his own hand over the top of Nicholas', taking it and moving the tip of Nicholas' thumb to the entrance of his mouth.
This is more than just sex, now. He doesn't have to hide his affections.
He kisses it at first, closing his eyes, inhaling Nicholas' touch. Then, he begins to suck on it gently. Nicholas presses in further, his thumb disappearing into Seiji's mouth as he cups the side of his face, his own eyes wide, slightly flushed.
"È meglio di quanto immaginassi," the other man muses softly. As he pulls his thumb out, Seiji smiles back at him. He feels like every whore in Rome at once, offered up for the taking.
"Nicholas," he exhales, filled with overwhelming desire. "Nicholas, I need you to--"
"I know," says Nicholas, squeezing his arm. "Hang on, I know there must be oil here somewhere."
He finds some in the drawer of the bedside table. Of course this room has been stocked for their honeymoon.
Nicholas opens the bottle and lets some drip onto his fingers. He returns to Seiji, who is shifting his heels back on the sheets impatiently, his heart beating quickly with his legs apart. Nicholas takes one of his knees in one hand, and after a nod from Seiji, he begins massaging the area, slick fingers working him open. When he's ready, Nicholas slides in one finger.
Seiji gasps. Nicholas' warm brown eyes are watching him, following Seiji's movements as he moves his finger in and out.
"Another?"
Seiji nods.
Nicholas works in a second finger, then a third, and when Seiji is just on the edge of being completely overwhelmed with pleasure, Nicholas leans in and kisses him, and Seiji kisses him back, one hand clinging helplessly to the other man's neck. Nicholas shifts his hand again, and Seiji realizes this may be all he's ever wanted, to kiss Nicholas with his fingers inside him, to feel his tongue lick inside of his mouth.
"I want to come inside you," he hears Nicholas' low, husky voice whisper into his ear. "Please, Seiji?"
Seiji answers him back with a kiss. He takes Nicholas' hips in both hands, gripping into the soft flesh of his ass and pulling him towards him, their hard cocks bumping together.
"Do it."
Nicholas moans, distracted, and then starts moving his hips, sliding himself up and down against the outside of Seiji's hole. Seiji isn't even being penetrated yet, and he feels like he's about to black out from the intense feeling of touch.
Nicholas takes hold of one of Seiji's knees to steady both of them. And then, he presses himself inside, and doesn't stop until the full length is sheathed inside Seiji.
Their eyes meet, and Seiji makes some sort of noise that would embarrass him in any other context. And then, long and slow at first, Nicholas fucks into him.
It's lovely. Seiji has never been quite so taken care of in his life, and yet he has to pull Nicholas closer and tell him, "I need you to fuck me as hard as you can."
Nicholas smiles, surprised, and then takes the suggestion, quickening the pace, and Seiji watches him let himself go, eyes closed as he thrusts harder, pressing Seiji into the mattress.
Seiji isn't sure which of them comes first. When he releases, it's like something has been stuck inside him his entire life, finally let free to flow through him. Nicholas pulls out, and his seed drips onto the floor, onto the bedsheets, onto Seiji, and they soon find themselves clinging together, reveling in the delightful warmth of their shared body heat as the cold from the storm seeps in through the windows.
Nicholas lets out a long, slow exhale, one cheek pressed against the sheets, eyes half-lidded when he mumbles,
"You're not going to regret this tomorrow?"
And to that, Seiji takes his face in both hands and kisses him.