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23 and Not Me

Summary:

All for One finds out the Todorokis are his secret children, and goes into vaulting mode. Dabi would rather the boss never realize that he’s Touya Todoroki, because there’s quite literally a vault with his name on it.

Notes:

I’ve already gifted All for One to Dabi for his birthday. But then my sister came up with a hilarious idea that I just had to write. I suppose I haven’t done All for One as Dabi’s biological father yet! I keep hitting the Todoroki family like a piñata but they’re just so dysfunctional, they create great Dad for One AUs. Abuse is how both me and my sister show our love for our favorite characters.

The fic cover art is also a gift for my sister. Thank you to suugiart for the awesome commission, I love how adorable you drew them. This shows Dabi realizing how much he looks like Yoichi. Tumblr link at: https://www.tumblr.com/suugiart/739901697504198656/why-is-my-reflection-someone-i-dont-know

This fic takes place in an alternate universe (if All for One being Dabi’s father wasn’t enough of a divergence already.) Touya/Dabi ran away from home at a younger age. The incident where he set himself on fire still happened, and everyone believes he died, but he was younger and survived with lighter injuries because his quirk was weaker. Endeavor was an even worse dad for reasons that will be addressed in this fic. Dabi never tried to kill Shouto or had his full fall to darkness. Because of divergent events in his past, Dabi’s character will be different from many of my other fics. The change is also partly All for One’s genetics.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Dabi slouched into the headquarters of the League of Villains with his hands in his pockets and his hat pulled low. Although he’d dyed his hair, and burn scars ran across his face, he still feared someone might recognize him as the presumed dead Touya Todoroki. Fortunately, he’d never looked much like his old man. Unfortunately, he couldn’t do anything to change his quirk. Although Endeavor had been quick to declare his oldest son dead after the self-immolation incident, if Dabi started throwing around strong flames, someone might remember Touya had never left a body behind. Dabi couldn’t have that. Not before he had a plan to keep his mom and siblings safe. So Dabi had been keeping a low profile since running away from home.

Fine, he’d gotten caught up in a few vigilante incidents, but those hadn’t been his fault! He entirely blamed Birdbrain for dragging him into those messes. Or at least for publicizing the aftermath.

The League of Villains were not people who Dabi normally associated with. He’d caught a glimpse of Muscular and Moonfish on his way in, and those two gave him the willies. They were real villains—not like him, a nameless down-on-his-luck dude dodging a few vigilante charges. Dabi had a plan: to use the League to spread the dirt he’d collected on Endeavor while he remained in the shadows. When Endeavor was distracted, Dabi would swoop in and save Shouto.

At least Fuyumi and Natsuo were old enough to leave home, and Mom was relatively safe in the hospital. But poor Shouto was suffering Endeavor all alone now. Dabi touched his trench coat pocket, where he kept pictures of his family in his wallet. He’d run away from home before Shouto had ever been born. Yet he’d lingered around his family from a distance, helping where he could. Shouto was an adorable kid, and Dabi was a big brother, so it was his job to rescue the kid.

Opening the door, Dabi said, “Hey, I brought a flash drive of number two hero scandals, you can take it and let me know if you have any questions—” His voice trailed off abruptly. A heavily scarred man with breathing equipment sat behind a cherry desk. It looked like an ordinary office room, but the villain in the chair could not be called ordinary. Dabi swallowed. Even as a vigilante, he’d heard the rumors. How exactly had little old him rated a meeting with the Lord of the Underworld?

“Sit down.” All for One gestured at the chair on the other side of the desk.

Dabi did not sit so much as feel his legs go out from under him. He smoothed back his hair, trying to look professional. Reaching into his pocket, he dusted off the flash drive before handing it over. “Everything should be on there…sir?”

Answering the unspoken question, All for One said, “Taking down Endeavor has just become a much higher priority for the League of Villains, in light of recent new information.”

Dabi blurted out, “Shit, what did Endeavor do to piss you off?”

In a voice as frigid as Antarctica, All for One said, “Hurt people very dear to me.”

Bye bye, Dad! Endeavor could die knowing he’d finally surpassed All Might at something—angering the number one villain. Dabi felt a little resentful at not getting revenge with his own flames, but protecting his family was more important, so he’d be happy if Endeavor died no matter who did it.

All for One plugged the flash drive into his computer and looked through the evidence. He did not seem to care if he kept Dabi waiting. Dabi had more common sense than to disrespect the Lord of the Underworld by bolting out the door…though he was tempted.

Abruptly, All for One asked, “How did you get so many pictures of my—the Todoroki children?”

Dabi shuddered under the pressure of that hellish glare. Had he done something wrong or did someone piss in All for One’s cheerios this morning? He said, “I’ve got an old grudge against Endeavor. I know the ins and outs of his home’s security.”

All for One pointed out, “In your videos, you triggered the alarms a couple times.”

“By accident.”

“You sounded the alarms deliberately when Endeavor was beating Shouto badly and you wanted to distract him.”

Dabi winced. “Look, I’ve got a little brother who I’d do anything to protect. The kid reminds me of him.” The best lies had an element of truth. Also, even if All for One had a lie-detecting quirk, technically Dabi’s words should pass muster.

All for One smiled, and a nearby fly dropped dead. “Dabi, I like you.”

“You do?” Sweat poured down Dabi’s forehead. Those terrifying eyes bore into his skull. He wondered how All for One treated people he didn’t like.

“You’re a fire-wielding vigilante with a sickly body. You remind me a lot of someone from my past. Once, I had a little brother too…”

Dabi nearly objected to being called sickly, but All for One’s gaze had taken on a dreamy look and he didn’t want to interrupt the crazy. He just smiled, nodded, and measured the distance to the window.

All for One’s eyes refocused on Dabi. “Here’s my offer. I’ll give you a fire resistance quirk to cure your difficulties using your power. In exchange, I need you to protect Shouto while I plot his tormentor’s downfall. I want to destroy Endeavor before I kill him. I want his hero reputation to be in tatters and the public to turn on him. I want to see him rot in jail before I finally slit his miserable throat like a pig. While I’m undertaking my masterpiece of revenge, I need a reliable pawn to watch over Shouto and ensure Endeavor doesn’t have another chance to hurt him before his arrest.”

“Whoa.” Dabi had to admit that sounded like a better revenge than he could have managed on his own. And he was being offered a quirk for a task he would have done for free. What was the catch? There had to be a catch. All his life, Dabi had learned no one ever gave him anything for nothing. But he needed the fire resistance quirk too badly to refuse. Rumor had it that no one refused All for One regardless. “I accept. I’m very grateful, Your Evilness.”

All for One struck like a snake, grabbing Dabi’s wrist. The transfer happened so fast Dabi barely had time to feel it. But he noticed the sudden lightness of his body. The room felt cooler and more comfortable.

“Uh, thanks?” Dabi mumbled, massaging his wrist.

All for One said, “Now that I own you, I can reveal to you the full importance of your mission.”

Dabi really didn’t like the sound of that. “Um, not to be rude, Your Evilness, but I never agreed to join your band of evil boy scouts.”

All for One talked over him. “I probably shouldn’t tell you this, but I have an uncontrollable need to monologue my problems to someone. You really do remind me of Yoichi, and it was always great fun to lecture him. Besides, you’re completely expendable so I can kill you if you ever tell anyone.”

“Actually, I’d rather not hear this.” Dabi edged for the door. He could sympathize with the need to monologue, it was a weakness of his own as well, but no one enjoyed being on the receiving end.

All for One said, “I’m the biological father of all the so-called Todoroki children.”

Dabi froze with his foot raised. “On second thought, please continue.” This sounded insane but if he had the slightest chance to have literally anyone except Endeavor as his father, then he’d be thrilled. He sat back down.

“I had no idea until recently.” All for One sagged in his seat, the tired lines on his face making him look nearly human. “My cursed doctor betrayed me and stole my DNA to use in his experiments. The traitor Garaki has already died for his offense. While he still had the voice to beg, he attempted to justify himself saying that he’d been creating genetic experiments designed to defeat All Might. He teamed up with Endeavor for this purpose. Endeavor is infertile. He wanted a sperm donor with the strongest quirk to produce the most powerful children for him to claim as his own.”

“Huh,” Dabi said. On the one hand, it was all too insane to be real. On the other hand, this would explain why Endeavor had treated his children so coldly. He’d never acted like a father to any of them. He’d been a ruthless trainer to Dabi and Shouto, while ignoring Natsuo and Fuyumi. At times Dabi had feared his dad didn’t even care if he died during their brutal spars. If he’d never been Endeavor’s son, just an experiment, then it would explain how easily he’d been thrown away. But… “Then why do all the kids have fire and ice quirks?”

“My children are capable of inheriting any of the quirks I’ve stolen. I have more than one elemental ability. Garaki genetically engineered all the Todoroki children to have ice or fire quirks. My DNA holds the ability to wield more than one quirk, which Garaki used as a template to create a chimera ice and fire quirk. He failed until my youngest son.”

This was all starting to make too much sense. It was world-shattering. Yet it filled in holes from his life. A thousand offhanded insults from his father made more sense now. Why had Endeavor always seemed to resent his children for not being his own DNA when he’d been the one to decide to use a sperm donation? Because he was an asshole, obviously. Slowly, Dabi asked, “Why would Rei Todoroki have agreed?”

“She didn’t know. Her children were conceived through artificial insemination, but she had no idea they were not her husband’s.” All for One shrugged. “She’s not my family, so she’s irrelevant to me. From now on, my most important mission is to protect my children from further harm. Family means everything to me. I hate that I never knew I had children or got the chance to raise them. I hate that they suffered without me. From now on, I’ll make it up to them.”

Oh, how interesting—maybe Dabi could use this to get out of being treated like a disposable minion. All for One seemed a bit unstable but completely sincere. Although Dabi wasn’t exactly in the market for a new dad, he might tolerate a villain for a father just to stick it to Endeavor. Better yet, All for One might let him join in on the gruesome revenge. “Actually, I’m T—”

All for One said, “I already have vaults prepared.”

Dabi’s words died on his tongue. He cleared his throat. “Vaults, you say? Please tell me more.”

“I was going to whether you asked or not.” All for One turned his computer screen to show images of three furnished bank vaults. The one on the left held children’s toys, the one in the middle had been decorated like a clichéd pink princess room, and the one in the middle had posters for Natsuo’s favorite sports teams. “I’ve long been of the opinion that family is only safe when locked inside a bank vault. My little brother died after he escaped my vault, proving my point.”

“Fascinating logic, Your Evilness.” Dabi swallowed around a dry throat. Dammit, his old dad was freaking Endeavor, how had his new one managed to be even more nuts? He had no luck in the paternal department, none at all. This looked bad. How was he supposed to protect his siblings from the number one villain?

All for One said, “I intend to at least try to reach out to my children first and develop a relationship. After I’ve destroyed Endeavor, I’ll introduce myself as an ordinary salaryman who became a sperm donor without his knowledge. If they don’t seem amendable to my attempts to protect their safety and improve their lives, then it will be time out in the bank vault.”

Seeing a way out, Dabi laughed with relief. “Oh, don’t worry, the Todoroki kids have dealt with such a bad dad, literally anyone would be an improvement. I’m sure they’ll be delighted to meet you.”

“Although, Shouto has been through such a rough time, and he’s the littlest baby, maybe I should just take him straight to the vault to love and look after.”

“But!” Dabi cried, his mind groping around for inspiration. “If you put only Shouto in a bank vault, then the other kids might think that you love him the most.”

“Hmmm, good point.” All for One tapped his chin, considering. “I don’t want to start out this family by breeding resentment and showing perceived favoritism. I’d better not vault one of them if I’m not going to vault all of them.”

Dabi breathed a sigh of relief that he’d correctly interpreted and manipulated the crazy.

All for One said, “Although if Touya was still alive, he’d have to go straight in the vault no matter what.”

“He would?” Dabi croaked.

“Vaulting is always the punishment for dying.” All for One’s face twisted and his voice shattered in pain. “Oh, my poor, dear Touya! How I regret that I never got to know him! Especially because he looked the most like Yoichi after his hair turned white.” All for One clicked to another picture on his computer screen, this one showing an empty vault with a photograph of five-year-old Touya Todoroki smiling at the camera. Dabi remembered taking that picture at his birthday party, one of his rare happy childhood memories. All for One sighed deeply. “I keep his picture in the vault because that’s the closest I can come to sticking him in there. What a shame his body was cremated.”

Holy hell, that was a whole lot of crazy. Dabi swallowed down a whimper. “What a shame…indeed…that you will never, ever see Touya Todoroki again. That kid is extremely gone.” And soon to be gone further away from this lunatic at the first opportunity.

All for One slapped Dabi on the shoulder. “Now you know the true importance of your mission, you understand the price of failure will be your slow and painful death if Shouto gets a single bruise. This was a good talk.”

Yeah, actually, Dabi knew a whole lot more than All for One at the moment. In particular, Dabi knew that he could never let All for One find out his real identity.


For all that Dabi wanted to flee the country, he needed to fulfill his mission first because he truly was worried about what might happen to his little brother if Endeavor snapped. The man had one legally dead adopted kid, he might go for two. Dabi already had surveillance equipment set up around the Todoroki mansion. He’d even gotten a small camera into the dojo. The dangerous period would come later tonight after All for One released his video of Endeavor’s crimes. Dabi headed to a convenience store to buy snacks to keep himself fed during his all-night stakeout.

As Dabi emerged from the grocery store, Hawks dropped from the sky and called, “Got a moment?”

Dabi groaned. “Not now, Birdbrain.”

Hawks clutched at his heart in mock-offense. “After all the times we’ve worked together, I get insults? I thought we were a team!”

“Don’t let your publicist catch you admitting to working with a vigilante.” Dabi rolled his eyes. Since it didn’t look like Hawks would be leaving him alone anytime soon, he sat down on a nearby street bench. He even pulled out a cigarette and lit it. “Is this another sales pitch trying to convince me to join the fucking HPSC?”

“Vigilantes have short lifespans. I really do worry about you, my dear friend.” Hawks batted his wings in a way that his fans no doubt found charming.

Dabi blew smoke in the hero’s face. “Worry about yourself, shithead. The HPSC is rotten to the core. I don’t know how they got that leash around your neck, but if you need help getting it off, I’ve got some dirt on them.”

“Thank you.” Hawks’ smile became a tad more genuine, less showman. “I’m fine, really.”

Dabi looked Hawks over in an exaggerated way. “Would someone who’s ‘fine’ dress like that? Dude, your pants look like they’re about to fall down without a belt.”

“Excuse me, I don’t want to hear that from someone who dresses like it’s Halloween all year round.”

“Tell your hair stylist not to quit his day job, Birdbrain.”

Putting his foot up on the bench armrest, Hawks leaned in until their faces nearly touched. “Old buddy, old pal, there is one huge way that you could help me out. I’ve heard you’re meeting with the League of Villains. If you could introduce me—”

“No.”

“What if I told you that I’m interesting in going rogue? Leaving the HPSC like you’ve always wanted?” Hawks waggled his eyebrows.

“I’d call you a liar and a spy,” Dabi said flatly. He took a long drag from his cigarette. “I know you, Hawks. You’d never become a villain. You’ve got an idealistic glimmer under your armor of cynicism. You want to make this shitty world a better place. And you’ve got huge daddy issues, trust me, it takes one to know one. Was your father a villain?”

“Ha-ha, let’s change the subject,” Hawks said brightly. “Come on, would you at least give me a clue about how I could arrange my own meeting with the boss of the League of Villains? I promise not to mention your name.”

“There’s too much of a risk they’d figure out I helped you. I’m not getting vaulted because of you, idiot.”

“Vaulted?”

“Never mind.” Dabi tossed his cigarette on the ground. He hadn’t yet decided if he would tell All for One his identity if he was ever in a position forced to decide between that or being murdered by the villain. Some fates were worse than death. He’d sacrificed a lot for his prized freedom. On the other hand, a dead man couldn’t protect his siblings. Should he warn them? But it seemed like they had better odds of staying out of the vault if they didn’t know the truth about their about-to-appear new father.

Hawks picked up the fallen cigarette and threw it in the trashcan across the street with perfect aim. “I could arrest you for littering if you don’t help me.” The tone was joking. Dabi knew Hawks wouldn’t arrest him, or he wouldn’t have stopped to talk with the hero in the first place.

Leaning back on the bench, Dabi sighed. “Look, Birdbrain, you don’t want to get involved with the League of Villains. Their boss is a goddamn looney. Trust me, I met him earlier today. This is a mission you want to deliberately fail.”

Hawks asked, “Then why are you joining them?”

“I’m not joining those psychos, I only accepted one job. I have personal reasons.”

Hawks made a neutral noise in the back of his throat. “If you’re in trouble, then I could help you. We wouldn’t have to involve the HPSC. I have access to fake identities and money. If need be, I could get you out of the country quickly.”

Dabi looked up. Hawk’s face was completely serious. Dabi had never known what to do with sincerity. Sarcasm was easier to handle. He coughed and shifted his gaze downward. “I’m not in any trouble, not at the moment. But I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Can’t lose my favorite vigilante accomplice,” Hawks said brightly. “I’d miss these chats too much. You always have the best insults.”

By mutual agreement, they parted before this got soppy.


Dabi immensely enjoyed watching All for One’s video of Endeavor’s crimes. Not the parts where baby him got kicked around, but hell yes to All for One’s brutal takedown of Endeavor’s entire hero career. The ending had been the reveal Endeavor had been colluding with villains to destroy the beloved Symbol of Peace All Might. It was suitably dramatic, though Dabi would have included more dancing. As the clock struck midnight, Dabi started to hope Endeavor wouldn’t come home. Maybe the police had already arrested him for child abuse and treason.

While sitting in a tree and waiting, Dabi entertained himself by flipping through his Shouto scrapbook on his phone. His little brother was the cutest in existence. Through the half-open window, Dabi snapped another picture of sleeping Shouto for his collection.

An hour later, Endeavor staggered through the front door, stinking drunk. Ugh, this looked like a code red. Dabi scaled the wall of the mansion.

The pattering of feet announced Shouto coming down the stairs. “Dad? Are you sick?” From Shouto’s confused tone, he must not have seen the video yet.

Endeavor’s head shot up, an ugly expression twisting his features. “Don’t call me that, I’m not your father. You weren’t worth the money I paid for you. You’ve cost me everything.” He reached forward, hand flaming.

Dabi dashed through the door and jumped between them. “Kiddo, go up to your room and lock the door.”

“But—” Shouto started to say.

“Now!” Dabi snapped in his best big brother tone.

Shouto retreated up the stairs, but didn’t go into his room. He probably thought he might need to help, the little hero. Dabi appreciated the thought, but now he had a fire resistance quirk, he could handle this washed-up loser of a hero.

Endeavor blinked drunkenly, gazing at Dabi with no hint of recognition in his bloodshot eyes.

Dabi spread his arms wide. “I’m not a child any longer. If you have the nerve to hit an adult, give it your best shot.”

This provoked a reaction. Endeavor swung a flaming fist. Dabi flexed his abdominal muscles and let the blow land. Thanks to his new fire resistance quirk, the flames did nothing, although Endeavor did have a strong right fist.

While Endeavor was gaping in shock at his useless flames, Dabi grabbed the hero’s arm and threw him. Endeavor landed with a hard thump. Dabi kicked him in the head, then snapped a picture of himself posing with his foot on the unconscious hero. Smirking, Dabi said, “That’s one win of out several thousand fights, but the last one counts the most, ex-Dad.”

Damn, that had been satisfying. He’d just worked off years of childhood issues much faster than therapy. Although he felt like throwing up. He probably shouldn’t have let that punch land. Whatever, it had been cool. He finished off by doing a little jig on top of Endeavor’s unconscious body.

Whipping out his phone, Dabi called Hawks: “Is there an arrest warrant out for Endeavor yet? Sweet! Hey Birdbrain, get over to the Todoroki mansion and I’ll let you take the credit for bringing him in. Consider this my way of making it up to you after I refused to let you kill yourself trying to spy on All for One.”


When Dabi arrived at the ramshackle abandoned building where he squatted and called home, All for One waited for him. The villain sat in a folding chair in front of a card table. The broken table leg had a book propping it up. Cobwebs ran down the walls. All for One looked discordantly fancy in his nice suit. Waving a bottle of wine, All for One said, “Let’s share a drink to celebrate your successful mission.”

Dabi gaped. He was not the slightest bit happy to learn a legendary villain (who also happened to be his creepily obsessive biological dad) knew where he lived. But an invitation from All for One was an order. Dabi sat down. “Sure, I could use something to steady my nerves.”

“You did wonderfully,” All for One assured him, pouring wine into a crystal decanter that seemed to have materialized out of thin air. “I especially enjoyed how you took Endeavor’s punch to show him his own weakness.”

“Uh…” Dabi tilted his head. “You saw?”

“I have cameras everywhere in my son’s home, of course. However I preferred not to intervene directly since I want little Shouto to see me as an ordinary salaryman.” All for One smiled. “You were a more than adequate proxy. Your dramatic poise had real flourish. You even remind me of myself as a young villain.”

“Ha-ha! That sounds like a total coincidence you should never think about again. There’s no possible connection between a great villain like you and a lowly nobody like me.” Dabi drank to stop himself from babbling.

All for One agreed, “You are indeed lowly. But I see potential in you. Dancing on Endeavor’s body was a masterful touch.”

Yeah, Dabi’s last dad had said he had potential too. It hadn’t ended well. “With all due respect, Your Evilness, you’re probably blinded by your literal lack of eyes. I’m just a typical lurker at the edges of the law—wait, you liked my dance?”

“It was the perfect touch of humiliation for your fallen foe.” All for One took a sip of his drink. “My late little brother was a gloater, too. And he had your very unique dancing style.”

“Bird—uh, a friend of mine says no one dances like me.”

“Here, I’ll show you.” This time, All for One pulled out a worn brown book from thin air. “This is my Yoichi Scrapbook. It has candid shots of him from a baby to the vault. Here he’s wearing his pumpkin Halloween costume. We didn’t understand the concept of trick-or-treating back then, but I did understand theft. That’s why his candy basket has so many electronics. From ages five to fifteen, he wore nothing but Captain Hero T-shirts. See, his outfits only have a little blood from when I yanked them off my victims. Even when asleep, Yoichi had Captain Hero pajamas. He was such a fanboy. Oh, how I regret letting heroes corrupt him.”

As All for One flipped through the pages, Dabi peered over his shoulder. “I gotta admit your brother was cute.” Mainly because Yoichi looked a bit like Shouto as a kid. “Especially in the pictures where he’s sleeping.” Yoichi was asleep in more than half the pictures. Huh, how odd.

“Yoichi was less squirmy when he didn’t know I was filming him.”

“It’s normal to have a scrapbook full of pictures of your little brother that he doesn’t know you took…right?” Dabi felt a sinking sensation in his stomach. Oh, no, if All for One did it then it probably wasn’t normal. This was starting to remind him too much of his own Shouto scrapbook. But it was totally different in his case because he couldn’t talk to his little brother, so he had no choice but to lurk around out of sight. Yikes, he sounded like a total creep! The brocon might be genetic! Dabi felt goosebumps rise down his arms.

“Ah, yes, you mentioned you had a little brother too.”

Dabi hastily said, “I don’t like to talk about him. Um, I’m very overprotective.” He hoped that would be a reason someone like All for One would respect.

Sure enough, All for One nodded. “Understandable. Have you considered vaulting for your little brother?”

Dabi’s eye twitched. “No, I, uh…” Wait, Dabi had absolutely considered kidnapping Shouto to save him from Endeavor as soon as he had a better living space set up. He truly did have All for One’s genes! But surely Shouto would have understood and wanted to escape Endeavor, right? Right? And even if he hadn’t, then keeping him away would have been for his own good…oh no. Dabi whispered, “I’m going to try to be less overprotective from now on.”

“Ah-ha!” All for One flipped to the page of Yoichi dancing around his room wearing a crop top and holding a fake microphone. “Yes, I definitely see the resemblance between you two.”

Dabi winced. Crap, the skinny half-dead kid really did look a lot like him, especially around the face. He prayed for his scars to hide him. “No way, I’m not nearly cute enough to look like your little brother. Honest. I don’t have nearly as great hair as him.”

“Of course, no one had as great hair as Yoichi—except me.” Leaning over, All for One peered at Dabi’s face. “Your roots look lighter. Is your hair dyed?”

Dabi paled and thought fast. “You got me! I’m a dumb blonde, ha-ha. A very honey shade of blond, hardly pale at all.”

Casually, All for One said, “A little bleach would turn your hair light enough. I might even have kidnapped you if I didn’t already have a couple biologically related kids to use as replacements for my little brother. Family is always superior in my mind.”

Dabi turned red, then white. “You definitely don’t want me in your precious vault. I have a foul mouth. Shit, damn, fuck.”

“So did Yoichi.”

“I’ve never gotten along with an authority figure in my whole life.”

“Just like Yoichi.”

“I’m too incompetent a vigilante to resemble your perfect little brother.”

“Yoichi was a total fool, that’s another point you two have in common.”

“I prefer villains to heroes.”

“Now that’s more like me.” All for One chuckled. “By the way, you seem to be adapting well to your new quirk. Most people struggle to handle more than one power or at least have an adjustment period.”

“Oh, no, I’m not adapting well at all. I’m sweating a lot, see?” Dabi raised his armpit and sniffed. He certainly was sweating—from nervousness. “It must be me failing to adjust to the fire resistance. Ha-ha, another failure from silly old Dabi.”

“Your body seems naturally suited to more than one quirk, just like my family—”

Shit. Dabi had been caught. He tensed his legs, preparing to burn through the boarded-up window and run.

All for One finished, “—or people of limited intelligence, like Gigantomachia. I suppose you do seem a bit dense.”

Dabi laughed loudly. “Yeah, dumb runs in my family.” Clearly I got it from you, Dad.

“As long as you’re not as bad as Gigantomachia, I have use for you,” All for One said it as if that was meant to be a good thing. “You clearly have potential as a villain. I’ll be your mentor from now on.”

That had not been phrased as a request. Dabi shifted, trying to figure out how to turn this down without getting killed.

All for One continued, “As your first job, you’ll be coming with me when I introduce myself to my youngest son. Likely Shouto already trusts you since you saved him from Endeavor, so you can vouch for me.”

Dabi hesitated. He could not bear to leave his little brother alone with All for One. One wrong move, and Shouto would end up inside a vault. As much though it pained him, Dabi absolutely needed to be at this meeting in order to ensure it went soothingly. Oh, the sacrifices he made for family. “Happy to help, Your Evilness. And, uh, we can talk about the job offer afterward.” Ideally this conversation would happen from a safe distance.


From the street, Dabi spotted his little brother through the restaurant window. Shouto sat in a booth alone, kicking his legs. The restaurant looked completely empty—had All for One rented out the whole place for their first meeting? That seemed likely from Mister Always Extra.

As soon as Dabi and All for One entered the restaurant, Shouto shot to his feet. “Big brother!” With a happy cry, Shouto ran forward and hugged Dabi.

By instinct, Dabi’s arms went up to return the hug. Only too late did his brain process what Shouto was saying: “I got a letter telling me to meet a long-lost relative here. I should have known it would be you, Touya! Who’s your friend?”

Like a jerky puppet, Dabi’s head turned to look at All for One. “He’s joking! Kids say the darndest things.”

Shouto hugged tighter. “My big brother is my guardian angel who follows me around and protects me.”

“Oh, so you noticed me stalking you, huh…” Dabi shoved Shouto away, holding him off by a hand on his forehead. “I mean, I’ve never seen you before in my entire life, you strange and socially awkward child.”

“You were at my house yesterday.”

“Except that one time!” Now Dabi needed to use two hands to fend off Shouto. Sweat dripped down Dabi’s forehead as he gazed at All for One, afraid to close his eyes while facing a predator.

All for One’s expression flashed rapidly between shock, disbelief, acceptance, joy, and a dark sort of hunger. The villain purred, “How naughty of you to hide from me, Touya. But since I’m delighted you’re alive, I’ll forgive you. Come with me, clearly you need a medical checkup. That will give me time to prepare your new room.”

Dabi shoved off Shouto and ran.

As All for One ripped up the street looking for him, Dabi crouched behind a trash can and made a phone call. “Hey, Birdbrain, I’m taking you up on your offer to help me flee the country. Duh, of course I’m in a whole shit ton of trouble. Can you pretty please bring the entire top ten heroes to save me from the Symbol of Evil? No, this isn’t a prank call!”


OMAKE TIME!

Dabi: Funny how I never realized I wasn’t Endeavor’s biological son when he regularly called me a bastard while beating me.

Endeavor: You rotten little bastard son of evil!

Dabi: But can you blame me for thinking he was talking about himself?

#

Garaki: But master, I thought you’d be on board with creating designer babies to defeat All Might.

All for One: Well, actually, maybe I would have been if you’d asked for permission first and let me pick out the cutest one to vault.

#

Dabi: If I’m not Endeavor’s biological son then no wonder he replaced me. No one would do that to a child they loved. They definitely wouldn’t do that and think it a favor for the oldest kid.

Canon: …

#

All for One: I like this kid. I’m going to make him into my future righthand man.

Dabi: Uh no thank you. I have enough crazy dads in my life already.

All for One: I can cut down your number of father figures to one.

Dabi: Haha, but zero is a better number.

#

Shouto: I’m still confused who was that scarred man accompanying my big brother Touya. I saw him using fire, maybe he’s Hisashi Midoriya!

Dabi: Dumb really does run in our family.

#

All for One: Oh no, I promised to never give a quirk to family again after what happened with my little brother and One for All. I didn’t know Dabi was my son. This is a disaster.

Dabi: Come on, it’s a fire resistance quirk, what can I do with it besides resist fire?

All for One: You never know! With my luck it will turn out to be the legendary fire resistance quirk that grows stronger over time until you transform into a freaking phoenix.

#

Hawks: Yikes, clearly you win the Daddy Issues competition.

Dabi: Shut up and save me.

#

Dabi: I suppose you’re very angry that I hid my real identity from you.

All for One: Nonsense, I’m so happy you survived that I have a present for you.

Dabi: …It’s a bank vault, isn’t it?

#

All for One: Hmm, there appears to be a hero with somewhat spiky hair hanging around my eldest son. I know how this story goes.

Hawks: You know that I want to join the League of Villains?

All for One: Nice try, blond Second! You’re probably out to steal the rest of my family too!

#

Natsuo: I’m pissed we didn’t get to be in the fic. Does even the author forget about me now?

Fuyumi: I’m grateful. I did not like what happened to me the last time All for One was my relative.

#

Dad for One Dabi: Look, I just turned out a tiny bit different because I have a different backstory.

Canon Dabi: Don’t kid yourself! Instead of having a normal and healthy level of fratricide, you turned into a total brocon. It’s definitely All for One’s genetics.

Dad for One Dabi: I can’t believe I became a better person with All for One as my father instead of Endeavor…wait, no, I do believe it. At least All for One was completely absent from my life, making him slightly better.

#

Dabi: Why doesn’t Shouto remind you the most of Yoichi? Not that I’m trying to push you off on Shouto—okay I’m totally trying to shaft you off on Shouto. But shouldn’t the hero in the family resemble your little brother the most?

All for One: (Remembering Yoichi waving a flamethrower and laughing) You’d be surprised. Pretty sure the only thing stopping my little brother from becoming a villain was that I had the idea first.

#

Dabi: Holy shit, I really do look like my uncle. I never realized I’m so pretty.

Yoichi: Hi, I’m here to tease you about your love life as any relative should. You and Hawks are adorable but I win because I hooked up with two heroes to anger big brother.

Dabi: I see both you and your older brother are annoying.

Notes:

Credit goes to my sister for the pun title. I have to share some of her other title ideas because they were all hilarious: Father and Father Away; The Importance of Being Touya; How to Lose a Dad in 10 Days; A Fruitless Endeavor. I hope you enjoy your gift, sis! Thanks for being a better sibling than anyone in My Hero Academia (except Tensei Iida). The bar was low.