Chapter Text
The air feels cold against your face, the greenery of the forest below you with the clear blue sky overhead. It’s refreshing, invigorating, and you know that you need to savor these sights. Cling to the memory of the cool air blowing against your skin, running through your hair, because you know you’ll never feel it again.
You spent all night thinking about how you would do this, how you would free the world of Homelander. So many plans passed through your mind, but each one had its faults. Ways that it could go horribly wrong and result in mass death, ways that he could survive to take out his rage on your loved ones. The only plan that wouldn’t leave any potential for him to survive would mean dying with him.
Your eyes slide to the side, looking at Homelander as he flies beside you. He’s looking straight ahead, his lips set in a straight line with a hint of irritation tugging at the corner. You know what he’s thinking about without even asking. Being with him for so long, being so close, you know him better than anyone else.
Homelander is reflecting on your proposal the other day. How you emasculated him in front of the media at the girls’ Power Day celebration. What kind of woman proposes to a man? Don’t you know how weak you made him look? You made him look like one of those spineless oat milk drinking gamers that you used to work with.
There’s a twitch in his cheek muscle as he thinks about what he wanted to do when you popped the question. He wanted to wrap his hand around your throat and lift you off your feet. He wanted to slam your back against the table and knock the cake aside. In that moment, he wanted to show you who was really in control, but the cameras were on and everyone was watching.
He still has time. Homelander’s lips lift at the corner and he moves quickly. Slipping his arm around your waist, he tucks you beneath him so you’re facing up. Immediately, he feels your body tensing against his. You’re lifting a leg to wrap around his, clenching his thigh between yours and desperately gripping the top of his suit.
Satisfaction makes his smirk bloom into a full smile. Something sadistic, something that sends a chill down your spine when you look up at him. He can see the way your eyes widen, feel the way you cling to him with that fear still present. Even though you can fly now, you know that it would be so easy for him to fly up and hurl you down into the ground. You’d be lying broken and bloody on the forest floor…or maybe even impaled with tree branches like that manchild Jeremy.
To his surprise, your hands release his shirt and you slip your arms around his neck. It’s only seconds later that you lean up and bring your lips to his. Your hips roll upwards, grinding against Homelander as you release a small fake moan into his mouth. You can feel his arm move, feel his hands settle on your ass to pin your pelvis to his.
When you touch down outside of the cabin, you let your arms linger around his neck. Gently trailing your lace-gloved fingertips down his chest and leaning up to steal one last kiss. “We’re going to spend the rest of our lives together, aren’t we, John?”
He chuckles and presses a hand against your back. “At this point, you don’t have a choice. I said “yes” to your little proposal. You’re not getting away from me now,” he murmurs, fingertips pressing into your skin through your suit.
This is going to hurt. Even as you’re smiling and leading him toward the cabin, holding his hand, you can feel your throat tighten. You’ve gotten good at managing your pulse. Keeping your heartrate low enough that if he hears it, he won’t suspect that you’re slowly being consumed by panic and dread.
You’re both going to die today and you won’t even have the chance to say goodbye to anyone. Jeremy, his kids, Ryan…none of them will know how much they mean to, they’ll never know that you’re doing this for them. If everything goes according to plan, Vought won’t even suspect that anything is wrong until it’s too late.
The cabin has been stocked with ingredients to cook for yourselves. Even some fancier items for you to make a special meal to celebrate your engagement. There’s a bottle perched on the island countertop, a red ribbon secured around its neck. Beside that is a cake from one of the most popular bakeries in the city.
Walking into the kitchen and leaving him near the door, you smile at him over your shoulder. “You’re really making me feel special today,” you comment, letting just a hint of warmth slip into your voice. Your fingers wrap around the neck of the bottle and you take it to the other counter so you can pour a couple of glasses. As you open the bottle, your eyes lower to the label and you tilt your head. “Sparkling juice?”
Homelander strides toward the kitchen, hands clasped behind his back and a smile on his lips that makes goosebumps rise on your skin. “Oh, don’t worry. We’ll have plenty of time in the future to get a nice bottle of wine to celebrate. May I?” He takes the bottle from you without waiting for a response and he pours two glasses, sliding one to you.
“Thank you.” You’re smiling as you lift the glass to your lips, but you can’t help feeling like he’s onto you somehow. With your pulse relaxed and steady, with your eyes focused on his and your lips set into a gentle smile, you’re the picture of a happy fiancée.
Following him to the couch, you’re trying to decide when the time will be right to strike. Homelander is sitting beside you, his legs spread and one arm around your shoulders. Making you lean against him, making you listen as he talks about the engagement party that needs to happen next.
“We need to make this even bigger than the twins’ Power Day party. Something elegant. Something that’s going to have people talking about it for the rest of the year. I want our engagement party to be even bigger than the royal wedding, but we’re going to have to time everything just right. The wedding will have to be next year. I think that ten months from now should give you plenty of time.”
“Ten months?” You look at him with a sick feeling starting in your stomach. He doesn’t have to say it. You know him, you know what that smug expression means. Before he can get a word out to taunt you about planning to knock you up, you set aside your glass and grab his hand. “If that’s the case…we should probably get started, right?”
He chuckles and rolls his eyes, but Homelander lets you gently push him down onto his back on the couch. You climb on top of him, leaning down to kiss him as your fingers work at opening his pants. “So eager today,” he teases you, hands trailing down your hips and slipping beneath the edge of your suit’s skirt. “If I knew that commitment would get you soaking through your panties, I would’ve popped the question myself.”
“I want to spend the rest of my life with you.” The words are whispered against the side of his neck as you lift your hips, reaching down to pull aside the divider of your panties. A high moan slips past your lips as you sink down, letting the warm head of his cock push between your slick lower lips. Every inch you sink further down, you can feel his shaft opening your walls wider.
Homelander puts his hands on your hips and pulls you down as he thrusts his hips, fully sheathing himself in you. His head rests back against a couch cushion, his eyes closing as he groans. No matter how many times he fucks you, it always feels so perfect. He’s convinced at this point that you were made for him.
The other half of him, the only person that really knows and understands him. He can feel your slick walls clenching around his shaft and it almost makes him hiss. His hips start to move as your hands rest on his chest and he opens his eyes to look up at you. Watching you bounce on his lap as he pumps into you, the way your chest moves with each thrust. So beautiful, so perfectly his.
“Do you love me?” You whisper the question as you lean down, burying your face in the side of his neck. “John…do you really love me?”
“Of course.” His hips move faster, his hold on your hips tightening. Homelander leans up, bringing his lips to yours and only breaking the kiss when you push him back down with a hand to his chest. “I love you. I fucking love you,” he growls, lips twisting into a snarl as his thrusts become erratic. Rough, possessive, bordering on feral as he fucks you.
“How much? How much do you love me?” You can hear the wet smack of skin against skin, feel your slick arousal soaking into his pubic hair and wetting your inner thighs. The constant friction of his cock gliding along your inner walls has your toes curling, has your heart racing. Pleasure blends with flickers of panic as you know what you need to do. Now, while his guard is down. It’s the only way this will work.
“I love you more than anything. I need you, Y/N.” There’s something in his voice. A hint of desperation, longing, as he chases his release. “And as soon as we’re married, I’m going to be your everything.” His voice drops and there’s something sinister to his tone. “I’m going to make myself your whole world!”
Lowering your face to his neck again, you slip your arms around him. Your throat tightens and you can already feel tears swelling along the waterlines of your eyes. That cold, tingly sensation rapidly spreads through you and you lean down, phasing into him. You can feel Homelander’s heart beating inside of your chest, fast and getting even faster when he realizes what you’re doing.
The effect spreads to him before he can try to throw you off him. Ghost mode washes over both of you and your bodies slip into each other, blending and melting. Your bodies fall through the couch, through the floor, and you both begin to slowly sink through the earth.
There’s panic in his voice when he says your name again, his heart racing inside of your chest and sending vibrations through you. With both of you ghosting, he can’t fight you. He can’t claw his way back to the surface, he can’t use his eye beams to burn a path back up. All Homelander can do is watch layers upon layers of dirt pass you as you sink deeper into the ground.
“Don’t do this! You can’t do this to me! Let go! Let me go!” His voice reaches your ears, but there’s no power behind it. Homelander sounds so genuinely scared right now that it makes your heart sink, but you know you can’t give in.
You’re not sorry. You can’t apologize to him, not when you know that he deserves this. “You’re not going to be alone.”
“Stop it! Stop it right now! Y/N, don’t this!” He sounds like a child throwing a tantrum now and you melt closer together, feeling your bodies sink into each other further as you fall deeper. Two hearts melting to become one throbbing mass, lungs kissed together, pelvises joining in an eternal union. He’s losing himself in you in the most intense way imaginable and despite there being no pain, Homelander is falling into a primal panic.
The begging becomes more frantic and though there’s no actual sound, you know everything he’s saying. You can feel it in the vibrations between you, the movement of his lips and twitch of his throat beside yours. If you were able to cry now, you would, but the best you can do is calm the heart that you now share. Soothing it to a slow, relaxed pulse and trying to ease him back from a rising madness.
It's just unfortunate that the calmness comes with something you’d hoped to suppress. A sort of confidence, as if he thinks he can convince you to stop this. “Do you really think you can get away with this? Do you really think that Vought won’t dig us up and do everything in their power to bring me back? Everyone will know what a cold bitch you really are.”
“I don’t care.” It’s a relief to finally get to speak your mind, knowing that this is the end. You don’t have to hold back anymore. You don’t have to be afraid anymore. “Even if I get remembered as a monster, at least I’ll know that I did the right thing.”
“You think this is the right thing? You think that killing me…Homelander…is the right thing? What do you think is going to happen? Your little manchild boyfriend is going to get his kids back and they’ll live happily ever after?”
You’re quiet as you both continue to sink deeper into the earth. Homelander takes it as a sign to keep going. “What makes you think this will kill me? As soon as you stop ghosting us, I’m going to get out of here and you know that I’ll bring you with me. If you think your life was hell before, think again. I’m going to make you wish that I would kill you, but I’ll keep you alive. I’ll-!”
“John. Neither of us are going to get out of this.” All of the dread and panic that you felt earlier returns as the gravity of your situation sets in. Your ghostly arms hold onto him the best you can, feeling your shared heart thump faster and feeling the movement in his throat as he chokes on his words.
“We’re going to die together, here in the ground. As soon as we’re deep enough, I’m going to stop ghosting. We’ll regain our solid forms in the dirt. Too far beneath the surface for air. Too warped for us to survive, even if we could breathe. We’re going to go into shock first…and if we don’t have a heart attack first, then we’re going to suffocate.”
The explanation comes in a gentle tone, despite your racing heart. You try to sound as calm as you can, try to say it without letting your fear leak into your voice. You’re both scared, but this way, you’ll know for sure that he’s dead and that he can’t harm your loved ones anymore.
“You really hate me this much? You hate me so much that you’ll die just to get rid of me?” he snarls, but there’s an edge of fear to his voice.
“I’m giving myself to you, just like you wanted. I’m not going to leave you alone, John. We’re going to be together forever.” You pause and your bodies stop moving through the earth, frozen in place among the dirt. You’re sure that you’ve gotten deep enough. This should be the perfect depth to make sure that neither of you survive.
“You’re never going to be alone again, John. I’m going to be with you forever.” The words are much softer and it’s now that you let your despair leak into your tone. “No one will be able to separate us.”
“Don’t this,” he warns again. There’s something different about his voice now as your shared heart begins to race faster. “You know that you’re not just killing us.”
Your throat tightens. “I know.” Your body presses deeper into his and more of your organs begin to melt together, fusing into masses as bones begin to connect. You can feel your forearms fusing into his shoulders, feel his hands fusing into your hips. “I love you, John.”
Those are your last words before you stop ghosting. It’s just as horrific as you described to him and your bodies are buried deep beneath the earth. Vought traces your last whereabouts to the cabin, but you’re so far underground that they can’t pick up your tracking chips. When they finally manage to locate your remains, it’s much too late. The ghosting left you both so entangled that they have no choice but to bury you together…ensuring that Homelander really is never alone again.