Chapter Text
Tweak bros was, as it normally was at 1 in the morning, dead as a door nail. Tweek was behind the counter, gently yawning as he texted Craig, the gentle night around him almost abnormally silent.
Tweek then bolted upright as the door"s bell rung, only to relax as Mysterion and Informatrice walked through the door, a smashed robotics project under Mysterion"s arm and a large backpack over Informatrice"s arm,
"oh hey," Tweek said, followed by another yawn,
"you too huh?" Informatrice smiled, "seems everyone"s a bit exhausted today."
"A Mysterion and an Informatrice please," Mysterion said, audibly holding back a yawn,
"Add an espresso shot to both please," Informatrice said, shouldering the shorter hero out of the way, "I"ll pay for this one Myst."
"Thanks." Mysterion growled, before sitting at one of the tables, gently fiddling with the broken machine.
A moment later, Informatrice joined him at the table, their drinks in hand.
"Where"d you find this?" Informatrice asked, prodding the shrapnel on the table. It had, at one point, likely been spherical in nature, with 4 narrow legs to move around on and a large lens in the middle that made the whole thing look like a sickly eye, but it had been smashed and battered, cracking the pale blue and silver shell in pieces, and breaking it half.
"Random alleyway," Mysterion answered with a yawn, "Judging by the color and design, looks like a Professor Chaos original."
"I"m inclined to agree," Informatrice smirked, "How do you think it got all..."
Informatirce picked a piece of the cracked plastic off and flicked it back into the rubble.
"fucky?" She finished.
Mysterion shrugged, "I figure Chaos was doing something last night, broke it, and left it behind."
"You think? He usually cares quite a bit about his bots," Informatrice hummed, sipping her drink, "ah, sweet caffeine!"
Mysterion sipped his drink, and made a noise in agreement.
"Seeing as both you and Comet slept through Patrol last night-" Informtrice teased, pulling an old laptop and cord from her gear.
"You were also asleep last night Informatrice." Mysterion growled.
"That doesn"t matter!" Informatrice said quickly, waving him off, "Lets see what this reveals!"
informatrice fiddled with the rubble and her gear for a few moments, before speaking again.
"why do you figure hes started making camera drones?"
"Something stupid or nefarious or stupidly nefarious probably." Mysterion growled, rubbing his eyes,
"you"re grumpy when your tired." Informatrice mused, "Grumpier I guess."
"why does everyone say I"m grumpy?" Mysterion asked, "I feel like I"m not mean or anything? maybe a bit deadpan?"
"I feel like grumpy is more like a vibe, oh here we go!" Informatice grinned, bringing up the several hour long video. "do we want to watch all of this?"
"Do you?"
"Valid, lets just," Informatrice rolled the video back a few hours, to where she first saw activity that wasn"t darkness,
There was no audio as the pair watched a beaten, bruised and tired Chaos slowly walk into frame, a blown out candle in one hand. His Helmet had a crack through the reflective shield, though his face was still hidden. He still looked profoundly upset as he dropped to his knees, and gently closed the shutter to the camera, showing only darkness.
"Well then." Mysterion smirked,
"That"s kinda...pathetic actually." Informatice giggled,
"Nah, its sorta sweet." Mysterion smirked, "makes me feel almost bad for the guy."
"sure," Informatrice rolled her eyes, "I"ll rewind to the beginning."
---
Butters yawned, slowly drifting off into sleep even as he was soldering something for one of his prototypes.
As he drifted off he was suddenly woken by a searing heat in his hand.
"OW SHIT!" Butters yelled, suddenly very awake, tossing the iron aside and waving his hand, "shitshitshit that hurts."
Butters blinked tears from his eyes, as he inspected his burn. It was a very mild burn, but still stung, though it was far from his first time stabbing himself with the hot end of the device. He turned off the device, set it on the proper pad, and went to go dress his wound.
With the wound addressed, Butters returned, inspecting his half asleep work. Deeming it good enough, he slotted it into the new prototype minion and pulled on his helmet, flipping on the internal components powering the device.
"Alright, Upgraded Camera minion test 7," Butters smiled before flipping on the drone.
The camera drone was a sphere, save for the large black lens in its center, with a pale blue enamel coating. Slowly, the legs from underneath the minion shifted and it stood up to attention.
"eee!!!" Butters bounced in his seat, clapping his hands together, "okay okay!"
Butters tapped the side of his visor and connected to the drone. A small screen popped up in the corner of his view, showing what the drone was recording, an awkward angle of his own face stared at him in his peripheral vision.
"ahaha! YES!" Butter smiled, jumping to his feet and pumping his arms in the air, and the drone turned to follow him. Butters beamed, beginning to move around his small workshop and watching his done following his movements.
"yesyesyes!" Butters bounced up and down a little,
He had been wanting camera drones for a while, mostly as a second set of eyes on his surroundings, but being able to get a good view of somewhere before entering it was probably smart.
---
"Looks like he"s just testing this thing." Mysterion poke the robot, which whirred angerily, "oh sorry."
"Don"t apologize to the spy drone." Informatrice groaned.
"what? it made a noise!"
Informatrice rolled her eyes and skipped ahead a little,
---
Butters looked around, the night was still and tense, like the air before a good storm. He sparked against the night, his lightning normally enough to bring any hero right to him. The skyline was empty of heroes though.
"hmm." He hummed, looked down to the road. Empty and quiet, save a few likely drunk people leaning against the walls and lamp posts, asleep.
"Hmm???" Butters hummed again, before pulling out his phone,
Butts: Hello?
Butts: why is my name butts again????
Butts: where the heck is everyone????
Butts: fine, you all leave me no choice
Butts: FUCK
Butts: really??? nothing?????
"Ok this is a little unnerving," Butters said to himself and the drone, "Where is everyone?"
He sighed, putting his hands on his hips.
"right, lets get Mysterion to come out of hiding, shall we?" he grinned down at the drone at his heels.
---
"I do not like that grin." Informatrice glowered,
"Sup heroes and hero adjacent caffeine dealer," Comet said as he entered the coffee shop, before leaning over the pairs shoulders, "The fuck is that angle?"
"I know right?" Informatrice gestured at the screen
"Hey Comet," Mysterion nodded at him,
"Hey Mysty," Comet grinned, before pulling up a seat and sitting the wrong away around, "what did I miss?"
"Chaos being kinda dorky." Informatrice rolled her eyes, continuing to skip ahead.
"cool."
---
Butters was attempting to look relaxed and in control as he sat on the glass countertop of the jewelry store, the diamonds in his hands twinkling like stars. Unfortunately his attempts to look cool felt more like a toddler throwing a tantrum. It had been a solid five minutes, and still nothing, no sign of his nemesis, his new assistant, or even the cops for that matter. The alarm was still blaring loudly, which was starting to grind against his nerves.
Butters slipped off the counter, with a loud-
"FINE!" Butters huffed, ruffling his hair as much as he could past his helmet.
He turned and watched his video drone scale the counter. He smiled despite himself and scratch the top of its head, before offering his arm. The drone climbed up onto his shoulder, before he straightened his back and pushed past the halo of glass shards from the smashed counter towards the back of the building.
He kicked open the door to the security office, finding the security guard slouched over the desk, dead asleep. Butters felt a bubble of frustration rise in his chest.
He grabbed the officer by the hair, lifted their head, and let go, letting their head smack against the desk with a satisfying Thunk.
He smiled in satisfaction, before before frowning.
---
"Chaos was that necessary?" Mysterion asked,
"Its chaos, is anything necessary?" Comet groaned.
---
Butters hummed in confusion.
"Hello?" he asked, poking the stranger in the face.
No reaction.
He picked the stranger up by the lapels, and dropped them to the flood. The stranger merely snored in a crumpled head on the floor.
He gestured wildly at the crumpled form on the ground.
"What the fuck?!" he gasped, "Is everyone like this? Am I seriously the only one awake?"
Butters asked, frustration growing in his chest before blinking, "holy shit I might be the only one awake. wait!"
Butters beamed, looking at the drone on his shoulder, "That means I can, oh I totally can, ok ok ok! eheheh come on minion!"
He smiled, before pealing off towards the collage campus.
---
"What"s he planning?" Mysterion leaned in,
"Looks like the worlds easiest heist." Informatrice purred, skipping forwards a little, "lets see,"
----
His feet clicked satisfyingly against the linoleum floor as he strode through the darkened, empty halls of the art gallery. He looked left and right at the paintings and photos that hung on the wall, while his spy drone sat on his shoulder, watching his back.
Butters smirked as passed the crumpled form of the security officer, asleep on floor. He merely stepped over them, and practically skipped down the rest of the hall to the exhibit.
He cackled as he took the painting from the wall, and looked at it, before bursting out laughing again.
The warped face of the particularly poorly rendered infant stared back, and Butters took a breath, before dissolving into laughter again.
"oh my- phff, oh my god," Butters giggled,
While the rather bitchy artist had refused to sell him and Kenny the painting, he had been dreaming of owning it, and had figured if she wouldn"t sell it, he would steal it, but there was always the issue of the stupid security officers who tended to watch the art gallery like a hawk.
But now they were asleep, and he didn"t need to worry about it.
His drone turned back towards Butters, who pressed the new painting to his chest and smiled at it.
"ok, lets go put this away," Butters grinned, turning on his heel and walking out of the building, before sprinting home, leaving his camera drone on the roof of his building.
-----
"what did he take?" Comet asked, shoving Informatrice out of the way of the controls to rewind.
"hey!" she squeaked, slapping his hand away from the controls,
"I don"t think he showed it." Mysterion growled, ignoring the minor slap fight going down in front of him.
---
Butters smiled at the painting on the wall, admiring how it looked on his apartment wall. He normally didn"t like coming back home in costume, especially when the night was young, but putting the painting somewhere was a must, especially if there was a chance the heroes would make an appearance, despite the seemingly empty streets,
He had left his drone to keeping a watch on the roof, which is how he had noticed the odd percesion going past. A glimpse of their movement on his screen that caught his attention.
A small group of people, each donning black, tentacled masks, dragged 4 bundles wrapped in burlap behind them.
"oh nooo." Butters paled, before practically jumping out his window and scrambling up his building wall. He grabbed his drone and started to follow the crew from the roof tops, watching as they stopped at a seemingly arbitrary four way stop, made remarkable by the sheer amount of people there. the crowd opened for the group to enter, and closed around them again.
Butters hummed, squinting down at the gathering, unable to see anything past the darken forms. He groaned, before looking at the drone on his shoulder, and smiling.
"Oh I love you already," he grinned, before putting the drone down and sending it scrambling towards the cult gathering.
Butters silently watched, slightly kicking himself for not adding a way to record audio, as the cultists dragged a large stone slab with a candle on top into the middle of the four way, before they drew a strange symbol on the ground in red paint (or at least what Butters really hoped was red paint).
They suddenly unwrapped the burlap wrapped bundles, revealing a group of sleeping people.
No not people, people implied adulthood. The sleeping forms were children.
"NO! NO NO NO NO!"
Butters struggled down the building and stormed up to the group, chanting his objections the entire time, before roughly shoving some, very shocked, cultists out of the way.
"Are you Insane?" He shouted, marching up to and grabbing who seemed to be the leader by the lapels of their ritual garb.
"Our patron hungers." The leader stammered out.
"Its an elder god! It can get its own damn dinner," Butters gestured at the sleeping forms, the sleeping children, "And kids? That"s fucked up!"
"They are those molded by the darkness, by the very power which springs from our patron," the head cultist gestured about, "We feed our patrons back the power, and it grows in strength, and the scales of fate tilt ever so slightly in our patrons favor against its fated foe, your nemesis!"
The cultist gestured toward Butters, shoving their hands at him, almost like they were going to strangle him.
Butters stepped back and rolled his shoulders back. He quickly filed the "fated foe" comment in his mental "to be delt with later" folder, and hummed.
"Alright, but answer me this one question, how is this even supposed to work?" Butters shrugged, "are you just going to stab the kids and hope or?"
The cultist laughed, an echoing, unnerving noise that set Butters" teeth on edge.
"Oh no no no, this is far more complicated than drawing the sigil and spilling blood," they turned and walked towards the stone slab and candle. Butters followed "before this we"ve preformed a different ritual of a less deep, more elegant magic. It was rather more... resource intensive than this one, though quite worth it. The spell which has wrapped our fair city in the embrace of dream,"
"God this guy can talk" Butters thought, nodding along to the leaders speech.
After what felt like a solid five minute speech, Butters hummed, and spoke.
"So this candle," he leaned slightly closer to the candle on the stone slab, "is what"s keeping everyone asleep?"
"Indeed."
Butters smirked and blew the candle out.
The cultists gasped, and the seeping children stirred.
Butters watched the carvings in the candle glow slightly brighter before dulling slightly, the light slowly draining down the deep groves.
Butters grabbed the candle and broke through the cults gathering.
"Seize him!" the leader gasped, and the cult surged forward,
"shitshitshit," Butters though to himself, watching the spy drones perspective as the cult kicked them about.
Butters leapt onto a fire escape and scrambled up, before diving behind an ac unit to catch his breath.
He looked at the candle, its faint violet glow was steadily draining from it"s groves and swirls. He smiled, before turning his attention to his spy drone.
The cultists were spread out, looking around for him, though their searching seemed to be limited to the ground. He smiled, relieved, before he called the drone back to him. The drone returned after a moment, and Butters inspected it. It was slightly beaten up, its plastic crackled and its paint scuffed, but otherwise fine. He gave a relaxed sighed, before he stood, cracked his back, and stepped out from the ac unit, only to be met with a trio of cultist staring at him.
"Oh hamburgers." he groaned, before turning, only to be blocked be a different group. Butters took a breath and pulled himself to his full height.
"Say Fellas," he sighed, "Have you guys ever been struck by lightning?"
There was a nervous silence between the cultists.
"Well if you don"t move," Butters lifted his free hand and crackled, lightning leaping around in a threatening display, "I think you get the picture!"
The cultist looked at each other, before closing in around him and looping their arms together.
Butters" face screwed up in confusion, before he sighed.
"That wasn"t a very smart idea," he said, reaching out his hand and poking one of the cultist in the chest with a loud crackle.
The group of cultist yelped and leapt back collectively, before laying on the ground, each stunned,
"Seriously, do you guys know nothing about electricity?" Butters rolled his eyes,
"THERE HE IS!" Butters jumped at the yell and turned around to see the leader of the cult climbing the fire escape and pointing at him,
"aw hamburgers," Butters groaned, before turning and running, leaping over the gap between the buildings,
The wind was loud in his ears as his legs pounded against the rooftops, scrambling over the ac units and structural components,
"Mysterion..." he thought to himself, "does this every night?"
Butters looked up, and gasped. Three cultists blocked his path, and were too close for Butters to change course.
Butters panicked, tucking his head into his chest and running lightning down his back.
Then something new happened- like the current of lightning had turned inward before launching outwards aggressively and knocking Butters to the floor.
Butters groaned and checked himself over. He was laying on a rooftop. A different rooftop then where he was originally. He stood up and looked around, finding the roof he was supposed to be, still occupied with cultists.
He still had the candle, and his drone sat on his shoulder.
"HahaHahHA!" Butters cackled, bouncing around as he laughed manically, "How long have I been able to do that?!"
Butters grinned before flipped the cultists on the far rooftop the bird. He snickered before looking out over the buildings. He picked a random point a few rooftops away and beamed. He sparked, surrounding himself with a current, before aiming it towards the roof, before trying to turn that energy inward and outwards again.
Then that current shifted, he was there, landing with a shower of sparks.
Butters gave his best maniacal laugh and lifted the candle above his head, before the voice of the cult leader caught his attention.
----
"Chaos can...teleport?" Comet asked, staring at the screen, "Is that what I"m seeing? How long has he been able to do that?"
"I...don"t know?" Mysterion muttered, staring.
----
Butters knelt down and glared down at the cult dividing below. The Leader bellowed orders. directing the few remaining cultists to look on the roads he hadn"t gone down, standing next to the still sleeping bodies. Butters hadn"t realized that he had circled around.
He smirked, tucking the candle into his belt before jumping down with a crack of lightning.
Butters mouth split into a cruel grin as he strode up to the leader, who gasped, staggering backwards.
"Either start running," Butters growled, crackling with lightning, "Or your going to regret a lot of your life choices."
The leader, wisely, ran, stumbling over one of the sleeping bodies.
Butters groaned as he left, before kneeling down to one of the sleeping children and gently touching their shoulder.
The young kid jumped up, suddenly waking and flinching back from Butters" touch.
"oh?" Butters hummed, "sorry, didn"t mean to startle you."
"you..." The child said, scooting away from him, "you"re him, You"re Professor Chaos."
"Am I?" Butters asked, before looking down and back again, faking a look of shock, "well would you look at that? I suppose i am!"
The child shifted, looking rather uncomfortable.
"Now then," Butters stood, "I believe you have some friends we should get up, before They come back."
They suddenly jumped up, "Oh no!"
Butters watched them dive for the closest body and shake them awake, before he moved to the person on his other side, gently shaking them awake. He looked over to see the first child shaking the last child awake.
The girl at Butters" knees groaned and perked up, rubbing one eye as she looked around.
"w-where am I?" she asked, blinking blearily before she focused on Butters at her side. She scrambled back, in shock.
"oh dear," Butters said sadly, offering her his hand before standing, "Its all right, deep breath."
the young girl took his hand and stood, and looked around, before stepping towards one of the other children. The young boy perked up and barreled into her.
Butters relaxed, glancing around to make sure the coast was clear.
"Alright fellas." he said, suddenly grabbing the kids attention.
He took a moment to look them over. The youngest couldn"t have been older than 7, and they jumped around wildly, buzzing around the other kids with seemingly endless energy, while the seemingly eldest followed behind, though she didn"t seem much older than 12. Butters" heart twisted.
"first things first," He smiled, trying to cover the boiling rage that clawed at his throat, "What are you 4 assumedly good kids doing in a situation like this with a villain like me?"
The kids looked at each other, and looked downright uncomfortable. Butters sighed and knelt back down.
"Its alright, you"re not in trouble, with me at least," He smiled at them, tapping the side of his helmet, the opacity of his visor lowering so they could get a glimpse of his eyes, "But you are in danger, and unfortunately Mysterion and Super Comet aren"t around."
The kids shuffled, before the eldest, a young girl stepped forward.
"we....T-They took us," she stammered, her voice quiet and tight, "We all lived in the same neighborhood, and..."
Her eyes glittered as tears began to form. Butters relaxed, the grin and confidence melting away as the girl began to sob.
"Oh no, oh dear," Butters opened his arms and the young girl darted in his arms. Butters froze for a moment, before relaxing and wrapping her in a hug, running a hand down her back, "its ok."
"It was so cold," she whispered into his chest, "and there was always something in the shadows. it screamed so often. it was...."
"hell." Butters thought, gently running his fingers through her dirty, knotted hair as anger ran hot through his blood.
She gently pulled away and Butters set her free. She wiped her face with a muttered apology.
"oh dear, No." He said, gently reaching up to cup her face, only to hover gently above her skin, not wanting to hurt the girl, "You have nothing to apologize for, You"ve been through Hell, literal hell, no one should make you feel less for that."
A few tears rolled down her cheeks as she sniffled, before being tackled by the youngest.
"VAL NOOOO DONT CRY!" The young child sobbed, tears running down their own face.
"What? Kit?" she gasped.
Butters giggled to himself as the two other kids behind the pair laughed, before something caught his eye on his camera.
He looked down the road and sighed, standing up and rolling his shoulders.
"As fun as this," He sighed, calling his drone back to him, "We have unwanted company."
the group turned and shuffled closer to him. Butters blanked for a moment. He wasn"t used to being in charged of anyone, let alone children. He sighed, gently tapping the side of the eldest"s foot.
"Two blocks behind us, one block left, from there look for the sign that says police," He whispered, glaring at the gathering cultist as he pulled the candle from his belt, "Its not perfect, but they Should keep you guys safe."
"what about you?" the youngest asked, gently tugging on Butters" coat.
"Don"t worry about me," Butters smirked, a current of lighting crackling off his shoulder as he darkened his visor again, "just get yourselves to safety, Alright?"
The kids nodded, and ran off.
A few cultists ran to catch them, before Butters lifted a hand and struck the ground in their way with a bolt of lightning.
The cultists staggered back, as Butters marched forward, silent and thundering.
----
Kenny leaned back in his seat.
"well...." Comet popped his mouth, "Guess Chaos really isn"t That bad a guy then."
"Wow..." Informatrice hummed, "Myst I think I owe you a twenty."
Kenny said nothing. he just stared at the screen, musing on the brief glimpses of him interacting with the children and trying to ignore the carnage the supervillain ripped through the cultists.
"Mysterion?" she asked, snapping her fingers, "You good dude?"
Comet poked Kenny in the head, and Kenny jumped.
"you alive there Mysterion?" Comet asked, and Kenny shook his head.
"i am fine." He growled, poking the scrap, "Is anyone opposed to returning the camera to Chaos?"
The heroes at his side looked at him with shock and confusion.
---
Kenny glared out into the night, waiting.
he had been standing there for far to long, waiting.
Kenny turned his head a little, before a loud noise startled him.
A crack of thunder rattled Kenny"s ears and made Kenny jump about a foot in the air. This unflattering display was followed up by Kenny managed to land weirdly and roll his ankle, falling to the floor in an heap.
He didn"t even need to look up to know Professor Chaos was looming over him.
"Hello Mysterion!" Chaos laughed manically, "Like the new trick?"
"Why is it so god damn loud?" He growled, standing.
"Its thunder, Mysterion," Chaos beamed, snickering, "Its loud."
"ugh." Kenny groaned, "Well, its good that you"re here, I"ve been waiting for you."
"Oh?" Chaos cooed, intrigued.
Kenny rummaged around his cloak and pulled out the carefully wrapped wreckage of Chaos spy drone. Kenny gently placed it in Chaos hands.
"The internal components still work fine, but the exterior and the legs probably need repairs," he said slipping past the stunned supervillain, "I figured you just didn"t realize that it was still functional."
"You still work?" he whispered to the wreckage.
Kenny watched Chaos poke and prod around with the components, before freezing and making a noise that is usually otherwise only heard by giving a small child an even smaller animal.
"Figured you want that back." Kenny smirked, turning away, "Call it a reward for good behavior."
Kenny sprinted away, leaving the shocked ad offended Chaos in the dust as he disappeared into the night, only catching a call of;
"TELL NO ONE!"