Chapter Text
Show me, show me, show me, how you do that trick
That one that makes me scream, she said
The one that makes me laugh, she said
Remus knocked on Sirius’s door, but he couldn’t contain himself so he opened it. Sirius was standing right there, the room was smokey and smelled strongly of weed. He was a vision, though, standing there amongst all the chaos and disorganization of his room, perfectly kept, with perfect hair and perfect eyes and perfect teeth.
He took a step closer, snatching the joint out of his hand, taking one drag before tossing it into a mug. He could hear it sizzle. Sirius let out a half hearted protest of, “Hey.”
He didn’t care though. Remus stepped completely into his personal space and put a hand underneath his chin, forcing his finger up with one finger. Sirius’s silver eyes looked slightly confused, but there was also eagerness there. “You are perfect,” Remus said in a whisper of a breath. And then he leaned down to kiss him.
It was everything. It was nothing. It was imperfect until Sirius kissed back and then it was perfect. Perhaps Remus was a bit rough in the way that his hands slipped from Sirius’s neck to his hair, and pulled until Sirius let out that little gasp that he always did, but honestly Remus did not give a shit. He had Sirius again and he was going to have to be pulled away by force before he had a chance to have him once more.
Threw her arms around my neck
Show me how you do it, and I promise you
I promise you that I’ll run away with you
They kissed and Sirius’s hands went to his hips, finger slipping underneath his shirt and drifting upwards. He pulled away just enough to whisper, “Moons.”
Remus closed the distance again, however, because he couldn’t get enough. He was desperate, fucking gagging for something as simple as a kiss. But that was Sirius. Sirius was everything to him—in that moment, probably for the rest of their life, no matter what happened.
“Moons,” he repeated. Forcing their foreheads together and grabbing Remus with his hands, keeping him just far enough so their lips weren’t touching. “Please, I need to know. Is this—is this just sex?”
He let out something between a laugh and a sob. “I fucking love you, Sirius. I’m in love with you.”
“Really?” He was crying. “Still?”
“Never stopped.”
I’ll run away with you
Spinning on that dizzy edge
I kissed her face and kissed her head
Sirius forced their lips together. It was rough, passionate, frenzied, everything that Remus needed in that moment. He was practically dragged to the bed, turned around and pushed on top until he fell on his back. He got on his elbows and greedily took in Sirius as he ripped off his shirt, and those tattoos, those fucking tattoos. Sirius climbed on top of him, sitting firmly on his hips.
Soon, almost too quickly, not that he would complain, they were kissing again. Remus let his hands trail up and down Sirius’s sides, light and teasing. It was passionate, fierce, but they were in no rush. “ Please ,” Sirius murmured between kisses.
Remus smiled, Sirius brought out this side in him, teasing and demanding. He was like it with others but it certainly wasn’t as strong nor natural. “Please what, Sirius?”
He moved to nuzzle into Remus’s neck, not quite kissing, but something adjacent. “Please call me baby.”
Oh. He didn’t know why that sparked so many emotions inside of him, but he pushed them aside. Remus could think about them later, this moment was about Sirius and them . “Such a good baby, asking for what he needs. My perfect baby.”
Sirius let out a sob, he moved his head up and looked directly at Remus, “I love you, I love you so much, I love you so much it hurts. And I’m so sorry, I’m,” he was full on crying now, “so sorry. I never want to hurt you, never wanted that.”
Remus put his finger against Sirius’s lips. “You don’t need to apologize. It was a fucked up situation, everyone was hurt in some respect.”
“You’re too kind.”
He shrugged, which was awkward against the bed. “Maybe, but I don’t blame you, Sirius. Not anymore. And we can talk about it, we can obviously talk about it, but right now—I want—”
“Me too,” he whispered, wiping his eyes with one hand. “I’ve missed you.”
“Missed you too.”
Dreamed of all the different ways
I had to make her glow
Why are you so far away?, she said
Sirius put on a matter of fact expression. He tilted his head, running his hands over Remus’s clothes chest. “Missed your cock too.”
He chuckled, because he didn’t expect that but it was Sirius. “I’ve missed your sweet little cock too.”
A deep flush came across his face, his voice was small when he said, “It’s not small, is it?”
He shook his head. “Well, compared to your ego, very much so. But,” he let his eyes linger lewdly across his body. “Compared to the rest of you, it’s the perfect size.”
He nodded with authority. “Good,” he started toying with the edge of his shirt, “Take it off, Moons.”
“Your wish,” he mumbled, taking the shirt off awkwardly since he was laying down with someone on top of him.
Once his chest was revealed, Sirius ducked down and started rubbing his face against it like a cat. “I’ve missed your chest so much.”
Remus chuckled. “What else have you missed, baby?”
He had been going for teasing, but either Sirius ignored that completely or it went over him. He looked up, veracity written across his expression, “You. Your mind, first.”
His breath caught and he nodded. “Second?”
Sirius giggled. “Probably your cock, second.”
Remus let out his breath with a smile—fond and affectionate. They were back to where they were a few minutes ago, and Remus wouldn’t particularly mind going back again and again because the happiness wasn’t fading. If anything it was growing.
Why won’t you ever know that I’m in love with you?
That I’m in love with you?
“How do you want my cock?”
A pensive expression crossed his face, hands moving across his chest over and over again, almost seemingly of their own will. “Preferably inside of me, but I’ll take anything that you’ll give me.”
He chuckled, pushing Sirius off of him. He lifted his hips up to take off his belt and then Sirius was on him again, pulling everything off—shoes too—to leave him naked. Sirius ran a single finger lightly, like a feather over his cock.
“ Fucking missed you, ” he murmured quietly.
“You have far too many clothes on, baby.”
Sirius grinned with a mischievous sort of expression. “Your wish.” He got on his knees and took off his own belt, then his fucking heavy black boots which seemed to have grown in size, and lastly he pulled his pants and underwear down in one fell swoop. Then Sirius was back on top of him and he positioned himself so their cocks could rub against each other. And it was hardly enough, but it was so very good because it was fucking Sirius—on top of him, staring down with lust.
You
Soft and only
You
Lost and Lonely
You
He reached his hand out and tucked a loose piece of hair behind his ear. “So beautiful.”
He didn’t flush like he usually did, instead a kind smile took over his face and then they were kissing again. It was languid compared to before, not rushed or as rough, but no less passionate. Sirius’s hands had found purchase on his throat, and at first Remus assumed it was unconscious, but then he started pushing more and more until Remus’s breath was cut off—only for a second.
“You trying to choke me?” He asked between gasps, pushing Sirius away just slightly.
Now he did flush, a deep pink color, heat radiating from his face.
He shrugged. “You can choke me, but I’d prefer it be via your cock.”
Then they were kissing again, slow and gentle, tongues clashing until Remus just let Sirius gain control—a little treat for the moment. Too quickly, though, Sirius pulled away and went to his neck. Gentle kisses became open mouth and kitten licks became sucking and biting. He was sure he’d bruise and he had no clue how he would explain that, but he could not care less.
Strange as angels
Dancing in the deepest oceans
Twisting in the water
Soon, too soon, Sirius pulled away and reached for the drawer. He got out a lube bottle with barely any left in it, but it had to be enough, they would make it enough. He handed it to Remus. “So demanding,” he teased.
“I didn’t say anything.” He said with a grin.
Remus shook his head. “Nah, you’re just a little prince and your demands are implicit.”
Sirius shrugged.
He tapped his thigh. “Can you get on your back?”
He rolled off of him with delicate ease, positioning himself on the bed with his legs apart. Remus got between his spread legs and poured some lube directly on to his hole. Sirius shivered and Remus savored that.
Perhaps he was cruel, “Too cold, baby?”
Sirius shook his head, staring up at the ceiling. “No, I can handle it.”
Remus cooed, rubbing a single finger around his rim, “Such a good baby, ‘m so proud of you.”
“You are?”
“Of course I am, I’m always proud of you.”
He let out a hiccup masquerading as a breath. He swallowed and swallowed until he whispered, “ Love you, Moons .”
Remus pushed in a finger, there was resistance there but not an exorbitant amount. He got to the second knuckle before he responded, “ Love you too .”
You’re just like a dream
Just like a dream
After the first finger was fully in and he started thrusting it in and out, the moans and gasps started. But with the second finger, the babbling began, “ Moons, Moons, Moons .”
“ Yeah? ”
“ Please .”
He straightened up so he could look Sirius directly in his eyes. “Please what?”
“ Need you ,” he wasn’t exactly crying, but the tears were coming down. “ Need you now, please, please, please, please Moony, please. ”
He chuckled, pulling his fingers out. He covered his cock with lube while saying, “Anything, baby .” Remus was really partial to Sirius begging and if he weaponized it, Remus would be utterly helpless and probably do whatever he wished. “Ready?”
“ Please .”
Remus plunged in, perhaps a bit quicker than he should have, but the warmth and the tightness after only two fingers, it was barely enough to bear. He might as well have died in that moment, because everything was perfect. Sirius looked blissed out beneath him, taking everything with ease. When his eyes opened they were petulant and he had a pout on his face. His hands moved up to grip Remus by the shoulder and he pulled him down roughly.
“ Move now, now, now .”
Remus reached out and traced the features of Sirius’s face. “Bossy little baby.”
Sirius swallowed and he rubbed his teary eyes. “ Please. ”
He pulled out slow and thrust back in just as slow, searching for his prostate, chasing every sound that left Sirius’s mouth. When he found that spot inside of him, he could tell because of the intense moan, eyes rolling back, and shiver. Sirius opened his eyes and he looked needy, desperate, beautiful. “ Kiss? ” He whispered in a plea.
He leaned down, uttering, “ Anything ,” before kissing him.
Sirius was falling apart beneath him and it was glorious. Remus would give absolutely everything to dwell in that moment for the rest of his life. To be able to see Sirius break down, succumb to pleasure so intensely that he couldn’t even kiss adequately. He wanted to make it good for Sirius, make it last. But he also wanted him to feel great and have the pleasure wash over him so he would feel it.
He wrapped a hand around his sock but it was batted away awkwardly. “ No Moons, no, just, just your cock.”
He smiled and then they were kissing again, or Remus was kissing, exploring his mouth with ease as Sirius was breathing out little sounds. Remus was falling apart too, the way that Sirius was clenching and the fact that was existing, taking pleasure was enough to make him close. He was doing his best to hold off, however, because he wanted Sirius to come first, he needed that.
“ Oh ,” his eyes shut and he gasped as he came. Remus was entranced, watching his face as he took it. And he was taking it, Remus didn’t stop thrusting, he was close and getting closer until he collapsed on top of Sirius and came—seeing fucking stars.
They stayed like that for far too long, recovering. At first he felt like it was hard to breathe, winded, but as the air filled his lungs over and over again he fully relaxed. He was laying on Sirius’s chest fully now, smearing the cum, probably making a mess but he could care less.
Sirius’s voice broke as he said, “Moons.”
“Yeah?”
“You’re still . . . inside of me.”
Remus hummed. “So?”
He chuckled. “Alright.” He shifted a bit and his arms came to wrap around Remus. “You gotta,” he shifted a bit and forced the both of them so they were both on their sides, holding each other. “Sorry, you were crushing my dick.”
“Oh, sorry, want me to move?”
Sirius pulled him even closer. “Fuck no.”
A thought popped into his head. “I never locked the door.”
“‘s fine, we’ll move in a second.”
Remus nuzzled into his chest like Sirius had a bit ago. It was repetitive, they had fully exchanged their statements about missing one another. But he still said, “Missed you so much.”
“Me too.” He whispered. “We—I, you love me?”
“Yes.”
“So, are we—are we together?”
He swallowed. “I want to be.” He tilted his head up, moving away just enough to make out the conflict on Sirius’s face. “Do you?”
“Were we, together, y’know, then? The tour and Vegas and after, because you sort of, you made it seem like we,” he sniffed, eyes watering again, “weren’t. But we were, in my mind, at least.”
Remus nodded, moving his hand to pull Sirius’s face down. “I was unsure of what you were thinking, especially in the beginning, but I figured with the, with Vegas, and what you said about telling people that you wanted some sort of commitment.”
“All of the commitment.”
He chuckled, “You wanted all the commitment, but you know, with everything after, I wasn’t sure. And when you, I wasn’t sure how much I actually meant to you, you went to Caradoc and that hurt.”
Sirius sighed. “I wasn’t in a good place, my mind wasn’t good. He helped. And I’m not going to say that it meant nothing, because it didn’t. But compared to you, everything that happened to him was nominal, infinitesimal. I think I love him, but like how I love Marlene. I love you, I love you like how the stars love the sky. It’s incomparable. You’re the,” he paused dramatically, “the only person I’ve been in love with.”
Remus swallowed. “So, we’re together, then?”
“Well,” he said in a joking tone, “we are married.” He pulled away so they could fully look at each other, “Will you put the ring back on?”
He smiled for a moment before he bit the inside of his cheek, trying to stop the grin. He tried to make his eyes look critical, even if it was a mock version of so. “You’re not even going to propose?”
Sirius grinned wide, all teeth, but he schooled it within a second. “I’ll propose. But not now, wanna make it special for you.”
Remus shrugged, secretly thrilled. “You don’t have to.”
“I wanna.” Then he looked into his eyes, something earnest, “You deserve something special.”
He smiled, leaning into his chest again. “Thank you.” Then he thought of something else, something he had to be sure of. “They know, right?”
“What?”
“Marlene knows that we were . . .”
He shook his head. “No, I couldn’t, I couldn’t tell them. But I can if you want, because I—I think I can. I’m ready to share you Moons.”
Remus smiled. “Just those in the house is enough, I think. I don’t wanna have to hide you here and to the world.”
“Well, once the book is out,” Sirius said, “we don’t have to hide.”
He nuzzled further into his chest. “That sounds good, baby.”
And then they stayed in silence until their position and the fluids that were covering them started to grow uncomfortable. Sirius must’ve felt it too. “Moons, can you get me a towel?”
He chuckled, pulling away, cock slipping out. “Anything.”
After some more talking, Remus went back to the telephone in the hallway and Sirius got dressed, going downstairs and into James’s room. It was probably very obvious how happy he was, the smile on his face hurt.
James was sitting against his bed with his guitar in his lap, strumming along a familiar tone, notebook opened. James looked at him with slight apprehension. “You good?”
He sat down on the bed, mostly to hide his excitement from James. “I talked to Remus.”
“I’m assuming that went well, then.”
He hummed, trying to be nonchalant. “We slept together.”
James coughed. “Right, so you didn’t talk, you just had sex.”
“No, I told you we talked. We talked after.”
James turned his whole body to look at him. “So, what are you two? Back to being friends with benefits?”
He sighed, he thought James would’ve taken this better. “We’re married. I still need to propose, but we’re married. We’re going to tell Marlene and Mary later, whenever we see them. They left, anyway, so when they come back. I wanted to tell you first, Remus is calling Lily.”
He smiled. “I’m glad, Sirius. You two, you just seem right together.”
That was better. “Thanks. I think, I think this it—it feels more stable. It feels like something that could last.”
James nodded. “I mean, you two are married.”
Sirius grinned, “We are. Still gotta propose.”
“Why? I mean, you already had the ceremony and stuff.”
“Yeah, but I feel sort of bad that I didn’t exactly propose the first time. We got married because it was the next thing, not—well, for me it was everything to me. Is everything. But I didn’t do it right. I should’ve proposed.” He looked down at his hands which he had been playing with without realizing. “I asked him to put on the ring again, y’know, and he was joking, saying that I wasn’t even going to propose. It was a joke but it made me realize. I gotta do something grand for him, he deserves it.”
“ Something grand, you say? ”
The laugh burst out from Sirius. “You remember, I thought you would’ve forgotten. You were pretty drunk.”
He huffed in mock annoyance. “I would never forget my best friend’s wedding.”
Sirius chuckled. “I honestly barely remember myself, it’s all a blur. More leading up to it though, I think for the actual ceremony I was sober.”
James looked to him with eyes that said, really?
“Fine, not sober, but sober enough to remember how gorgeous he looked in that suit. And that kiss. And the hotel room, after, he was—”
“Alright,” he said through a laugh. “I get it, you are in love. But what are you going to do for the proposal?”
Sirius pursed his lips, trying to think. “Maybe, maybe, I don’t know.” He flopped on the bed, “I’m hopeless with this stuff. I don’t have a romantic bond in my body.”
“First of all, you have gotten the chance to be romantic because you’ve never been in a relationship be—”
“Married.”
“You’ve never been married before. It’s about practice, Pads. And second of all, you are romantic, you do have a bone, it just may be a different bone than everyone else. What would you call your songs if not romantic?”
“That’s different,” Sirius said petulantly, “they take time, and it’s not the same.”
“Did you ever think about singing him one of your songs about him?”
He frowned. “He’s heard pretty much all of the good ones.” He lamented. “And then there are the bad ones and the sad ones. There’s,” he smiled, “there’s this really love-y one. But it’s not done, I don’t know if it would be ready on time.”
“On time, he gave you a time frame?”
Sirius shook his head. “No, but I really want it to be official sooner rather than later?”
“When’s the earliest you can get the song done by?”
“You know that’s not how it works,” he said, “I can probably be confident in a rough draft tomorrow morning if that’s all I do.”
“Okay, okay, how about this?”
Sirius gave the excuse of being particularly inspired, which he supposed he was. He spent the rest of the afternoon in his room, writing and writing until his brain felt fried. He smoked a little bit, not enough to get truly high, just enough to try and get to the spot where his mind wasn’t realling. When he came up with rough but working lyrics he started with his guitar, workshopping all the ideas that he had saved.
Eventually Sirius found something that he believed worked well and only a few minutes later, as if divine intervention, Remus walked into his room, after a quick knock. He leaned against the wall, smirking at him. “How’s it going?”
Sirius shrugged. “Good, I think.”
“Can I hear it?”
He shook his head. “Not yet, but soon.”
“I was that inspiring, huh ?” He teased.
He felt his face heat up. “It’s not about you.”
Remus hummed. “Right. We get back together and have sex, and then five minutes later you lock yourself in your room, claiming you were inspired. That has absolutely nothing to do with me.”
Sirius couldn’t really deny it, could he? “Fine, but you’re not hearing it yet.”
He put his hands up in a woah gesture. “That’s fine with me. I just hope you feel comfortable sharing with me sometime.”
“It’s not that,” he looked down at the lyrics sprawled across his notebook. “I feel comfortable, it’s just not ready yet.”
There was a slight smile on his face. “Alright, I came here to ask if you wanted to cook dinner with me? I volunteered.”
He narrowed his eyes. “And you’re trying to drag me into it?”
Remus leaned his head against the wall, lulling it from side to side. “C’mon baby, you don’t want to help me? We could be all domestic.”
Sirius smiled, he tried to hide it, but completely failed. He closed his notebook and got out of bed, stretching. “Fine.”
He laughed at him, something light and humorous. Sirius didn’t mind though, he walked down the stairs, across the living room, dining room, and into the kitchen.
“Are we making it for everyone?”
He made a slight sound of negation. “No, Mary and Marlene are getting something while they're out. But Lily told me she’s coming over.”
He grinned, “Sort of like a double date, then.”
Remus was smiling too. “Yeah, ‘pose so.”
They cooked together and it was domestic, easy going and playful being in the kitchen with Remus. Sirius still had to routinely stop himself from staring—because Remus was rather hot when he was confident and sure of himself.
When they put the roast in the oven and the salad was done, Sirius couldn’t control himself. He launched himself at Remus and kissed him, hands falling to his belt and pulling him nice and close. Remus chuckled into the kiss, “What happened to my sweet domestic Sirius?”
“Looked at you too long.”
Sirius grinned and he let his hand slip into the waist of Remus’s pants and—
“ Holy fuck! ”
They jumped apart and Sirius felt scared. He couldn’t remember the last time he felt that emotion inside of his house. Marlene and Mary were standing there, by the door, looking gobstruck, like a bomb was just dropped. Their eyes were wide, mouth slightly ajar, and Marlene in particular looked as if she had been slapped in the face.
“What the fuck?!” Marlene yelled.
Sirius crossed his arms, looking to the side. “We didn’t think you’d be back for a bit.”
She opened her mouth, almost looking angry. “Are you two,” she didn’t seem able to comprehend it; “together?”
“Yeah,” Remus whispered. “We are.” He reached down and grabbed Sirius’s hand, squeezing. Sirius squeezed back. “We were going to tell you tonight.”
“Tell us that you two are together?” Marlene asked as if she was unsure. “When?”
But they were distracted by Mary coming over and hugging each of them. “I’m so happy for you two. I thought there was something when I visited and—I’m so happy that you two are together.”
Remus nodded, looking ahead to Marlene, “To answer your quesion—”
However, Marlene forced her way in. She hugged Sirius first, whispering, “I knew it. I knew it.”
Sirius chuckled, full of emotion. “I know.”
Then she hugged Remus, whispering something to him as well. When she pulled back, she was beside Mary. They were both grinning. “When?” She asked again.
“The timeline,” Remus began, “is . . .”
“Messy.” Sirius added, closing his eyes, trying to keep his composure. “But we’ve, it began before the Peter thing , a while before, so it’s been a bit.”
Marlene nodded, suspicion in her eyes. “Alright, while we were on our way out. Just forgot something, so we’ll be back after dinner.”
Mary agreed excitedly. “And I want to know everything.”
They cleaned up the kitchen silently until they were gone. Once they were out of the driveway, Sirius sighed and let himself deflate. Remus ran a hand up and down his back. “You’re okay, baby. They were fine with it.”
“Yeah, yeah, I know. It’s just,” he looked up and his eyes were watery but he wasn’t crying. “I’m not a good person in our story.”
Remus’s mouth fell open and he looked surprised. “Baby.”
He shook his head simply. “I hate it, but I have you now. That’s all I need, Moons. And,” he felt sort of pathetic saying it, like he was grasping at straws, “we’re stronger now, right? Now that we’ve been through it. We’re stronger.”
He nodded and enveloped him in a hug. “We are, we just gotta keep talking. And we don’t owe anyone our story, y’know, that can just be for us.”
“And James,” Sirius whispered into his chest, “Lily.”
“That’s enough, and what’s it, ‘between friends is enough, grand enough to show the world, but precious enough to keep in my heart.’”
Sirius laughed through a sob. Pulling away, he leaned on his toes and kissed Remus chastley on the mouth. “I fucking love it when you do that.”
“I can tell.” He hummed, ducking just enough to give him a chaste kiss in return. It was like a trade. “I’ll memorize all your songs if you wish.”
He smiled, biting his lip. “I don’t wish, but it’s sweet, like you,” he thought back to the song he had been working on, “sweet like honey.”
Remus chuckled, smiling down at him fondly. He opened his mouth like he was about to say something but the stupid timer, which Marlene had painted to look like a cow, rung. He perked up, “Roast should be done.”
Sirius went to the oven, checking the meat. He felt a light swat on his ass, like he was hit with a towel, and sure enough Remus was standing there with a kitchen rag in hand. “Back to being my domestic baby.”
He turned away quickly so that Remus wouldn’t see his grin. Sirius shrugged, “I can do both.”
When Remus didn’t get Dorcas at home, he tried her extension at work. He caught her there, just as she was leaving. For a bit she talked about her editor and how she was assigned to supervise an intern who was nice but wasn’t very good at his job. Then talked about how she was going to visit her family soon.
Eventually she asked, “What’s going on there?”
He was both excited to tell her and nervous. She was the one who predicted that things would fall apart that first time. And she was his best friend—above all, Remus wanted her to happy for him. Because it had only been an afternoon but it was exciting, and it felt right. It felt so right. Whether he was looking at everything through rose colored glasses or Sirius was just that otherworldly that he could make everything seem different with just his presence—Remus did not care. He was happy.
“It’s about the same as last time, though, getting to know Mary under this capacity is interesting. I think her story will be good for the book.”
“And how are things going with Sirius?”
“Good, good,” he whispered, looking around, though it was hardly a secret anymore. “We talked.”
“How did that go?”
“It was good, it was a bit—we had sex.” He said the next bit in a rush. “But then we talked, we actually talked about what happened and what we wanted and we’re on the same page, Cas, we’re together, we—I love him.”
She didn’t say anything for a long moment. Her silence was deafening and anxiety inducing. Eventually she hummed, “You two really talked?”
“Yes, we talked, we want the same thing and he apologized.”
“I suppose, then, if you aren’t just glossing over everything because you are in love , then I’m happy for you.”
He smiled. It wasn’t grand or all encompassing joy, and it wasn’t exactly relief either. It was something between those two. “Thank you.”
“So you two decided on a committed relationship?”
“Ah-huh,” he muttered, “Committed and monogamous, I think we’re technically married, still.”
“Right.”
“I love you Remus, I really hope this works out with him. You deserve something real.”
Remus smiled, “Thanks Dorcas, I think that it is real. It feels so real.”
“I’m glad.” She paused, “I may have also been talking to someone . . .”
“Who?”
“Marlene.” Dorcas said pragmatically.
Remus frowned. “I thought she hadn’t—”
“Nope.” Dorcas cut off. Marlene hadn’t called since the whole Peter of it all, probably not wanting the connection to Remus, when she thought it was Remus, but now, “She apologized.”
“Really?”
“Uh-huh.” And then she talked a bit about their calls.
They had slept in Sirius’s bed together, it was delightful, leisurely, and slow—all languid kisses and light murmurs of happy, easy things. It was reminiscent—because it wasn’t exactly the same, there was a slightly different tone—of those weeks they spent in that same bed after the tour and after Vegas. Except now, they were free to show their affection and declare their feelings over and over again. No one, at least inside that house, was stopping them.
Make it up as we go
Feet on the ground, head in the sky
It’s okay, I know nothing’s wrong, nothing
Sirius had woken Remus up that morning by light kisses against his face, until those eyelashes fluttered and those warm brown eyes were revealed. Sirius sighed petulantly, “I was trying to kiss everyone of your freckles before you woke up.”
He chuckled, something low and hoarse, and when he spoke it was groggy. “Have to accomplish it some other time. I gotta use the bathroom.”
He nodded, pulling himself up and watching as Remus walked out of the room. As soon as he heard the bathroom door shut, he shot up and went down the stairs as quickly as he could. And luckily, all seemed to go according to plan, because James was standing at the bottom with the tray of food. Breakfast.
“Thanks Prongs.” He whispered before scurrying back up the stairs.
Fortunately, Remus wasn’t out of the bathroom, so he could set up the rest of the surprise. He put the food on the bed and locked the door, finding the candles and the lighter. Sirius didn’t want it to be completely obvious, but he also wanted to make it romantic. There was a knock on the door, sharp, and Remus’s voice called out, “Sirius?”
“Yeah, yeah, just give me a minute.”
“What are you doing?”
I, I got plenty of time
I, you got light in your eyes
And you’re standing here beside me
He finished lighting the candles and set his guitar and notebook up, so that they were easier to grab when the time came. He walked to the door, unlocking it and opening it to find Remus standing there in just his boxers, arms crossed like he was hiding himself. Sirius stepped back and made a show of welcoming him in.
He looked around the room, first seeming to notice the candles, then the food. “How did you manage to do that?”
Sirius shrugged, attempting to act casual. “Might’ve persuaded James.”
Remus bit his lips. “Rather romantic of you.”
He couldn’t contain his grin despite his best efforts. “Sit down, sit down,” he grabbed the tray and allowed Remus to get settled before he put it on his bed. “I have eggs, James makes a mean omelet, and I have tea for you, it’s English Breakfast. James drinks tea more, he said it was good—what?”
Remus had been looking at him while he spoke, expression growing from something too earnest to slightly humorous. “You’re so sweet when you’re trying to be sweet.”
I love the passing of time
Never for money, always for love
Cover up and say goodnight, say goodnight
He huffed, sitting down on the bed beside him, “I’m trying to be romantic.”
“I can tell.” He leaned over and kissed his forehead. “And it is romantic, thank you, Sirius.”
He nodded, grabbing the other fork and stealing a bite of the omelet. It was meant for him but it was big enough to share. They ate in relative silence, only talking occasionally about the food—complimenting the omelet and the tea.
“I’ll go bring this down,” Remus said when they were done.
Sirius though, swiped it out of his hand and moved to put it on the dresser. “That was only part one.”
“Out of how many parts?”
“Three.” He sat back down on the bed, grabbing his guitar and opening up his notebook. “This is a little rough, I didn’t work on it for very long.”
“Is this is what you were doing yesterday?” He asked with a smirk.
He shrugged, finding the right page. “What I’m trying to say is not to judge me it’s—”
“First of all, I would never judge you, but second of all, I think all of your music is beautiful.”
“Alright, alright, thank you, but be quiet now.”
He started strumming on his guitar, playing the opening that he had practiced yesterday over and over again. Then he began to sing and it was slower, a song that could probably only be played acoustic.
“ Oh, my life is changing
Not hard to accept the truth anymore
I know I haven’t felt like before
Never quite what it seems
Sweet lovin’ like honey
Oh, oh, oh, honey
Warmth and thoughts dripping
Like honey
Hard wide open truth
Honey dripping down the combs
Into waiting mouths
Slip into my closed mind
Impossible not to understand
They sat what they want
I don’t hear the buzz
I tell you know, open my mind
You have my heart now
Sweet lovin’ like honey
Oh, oh, oh, honey
Warmth and thoughts dripping
Like honey
Hotel rooms and back to home
Making it up as we go
Amber light never fade
Despite how the sun changes
Nothin’ to be proud of ‘cept you
Sweet honey, gentle wings, harsh sting
Stays with you, on my body
Opened my mind with your truth
Sweet lovin’ like honey
Oh, oh, oh, honey
Warmth and thoughts dripping
Like honey
Wasn’t hard to accept
Once stung, felt it forever
Never wanna pull it out
Out of all those people
Hive mind
Until I found you
Sweet lovin’ like honey
Oh, oh, oh, honey
Warmth and thoughts dripping
Like honey
Like honey
Like honey”
He continued to strum on his guitar, entrancement of the music leaving and his thoughts slowly coming to the surface. Sirius kept his eyes down, closing his notebook and removing his guitar from his lap—until he got the courage to look up at Remus.
And to his shock, Remus was crying, he wasn’t making a sound but tears were surely coming down. Sirius reached out and cradled his face, “Moons, what’s wrong?”
He shook his head. “No, no—was that, was that about me?”
“Of course,” he whispered, running his thumb underneath his eyes to collect his tears. “You're the only person I will ever write love songs about.”
And then Remus was hugging him, nearly tackling him to the bed. He chuckled as Remus pressed kisses everywhere—all over his face and his hair and his chest and even his hands. His voice was joyous as he said, “I love you, I love you so fucking much. I can’t even— fuck , I love you.”
Sirius laughed and he did not care one bit how he sounded in that moment. He struggled to reach his beside drawer with Remus on top of him, but he still did it. He got out the ring and shoved it in the space in front of Remus’s face. “Remus Lupin, will you do me the honor of continuing to be my husband by wearing my ring?”
Home is where I want to be
But I guess I’m already there
I come home, she lifted up her wings
He laughed and then they were kissing. Sirius didn’t drop the ring, he held it in his hand carefully as he threaded his fingers through Remus’s hair, gasping when Remus pulled his own hair. The kiss wasn’t particularly leading, but that made it no less passionate. Sirius tilted his head to the side, breaking the kiss just enough to say, “Is that a yes?”
“Of course it’s a fucking yes.” He sat full back, so he was on Sirius’s hips. “I would’ve said yes if proposed over a fucking bagel.”
He chuckled. “Good to know,” he ran his hands up and down Remus’s chest, pulling his boxers down just enough to see that crescent moon tattoo in his entirety. Marking him as Moony forever, his Moon forever. “I wanted to make it romantic.”
Remus leaned down and kissed his nose. “You did, didn’t know you could be so.”
“Might’ve had some help.”
He grinned. “With the breakfast?”
“And the idea for breakfast, but the song, that was all me. Or all you, technically, you are a pretty good muse.”
“ I’m your muse? ”
I guess that must be the place
I can’t tell one from another
Did I find you, or you find me?
Sirius nodded, a little confused, “‘Course. My greatest source of inspiration. You didn’t know?”
A little hysterically he asked, “Am I just supposed to be assuming these things?”
He shrugged. “Thought it was obvious.” He looked into Remus’s eyes pointedly. “You’re pretty much everything to me, Moons, so you might as well go ahead and assume.”
Remus surged down and kissed him, all passion and need and connection. Sirius felt like he was one with Remus in that moment, like he had reached the acme of his being, because here he was, kissing the love of his life—his partner, his husband, his everything.
When he pulled away, he rolled off of Sirius and turned on his side. Sirius did the same and they were facing each other. So close they weren’t even breathing the same air but passing it between the two of them.
“Where’s the ring?” Remus whispered.
Sirius grabbed it and handed him the ring. “It’s the same one from before, but you can have anyone that I have, or, or I can buy you one.”
He chuckled. “I like this one,” he grabbed it and placed it on his finger, holding it out in front of him to examine it.
“Suits you,” Sirius whispered.
Remus turned back on his side and put his arm underneath his head. “I’m thinking I should buy you a ring, now.”
“Don’t have to.”
“Still, I think I should give you something to celebrate our marriage.”
Sirius shrugged. “It’s whatever you want, Moons, you’re enough for me.”
There was a time before we were born
If someone asks, this is where I’ll be, where I’ll be
I, we drift in and out
He closed his eyes and let out a shaky breath. When he opened them again, they looked like a much richer shade of brown—inexplicably so. His expression was solemn and he ran a hand over Sirius’s cheek. “Sweet talker.”
He smiled, “Just love you.”
Remus grinned too. “Good, because husbands should love each other.”
Sirius forced himself into Remus’s chest. “We never got a honeymoon.” He said that because it was one of the many things on his mind, it was one of the ones of lesser importance, one that wouldn’t really affect him. He would have to slowly work up the courage to ask the others.
“You want to take a trip somewhere?”
He nodded.
“We can do that,” Remus said and his grin was audible. “Where do you want to go?”
I, sing into my mouth
Out of all those kinds of people
You got a face with a view
“I’ve been to places, lots, so I think I’d like to explore somewhere new with you. You pick.”
He hummed and Sirius could feel the vibrations reverberate through him. “I’ve always wanted to visit one of the Nordic countries, or maybe China. I had this book about Chinese architecture, I was obsessed with it. I always thought that would be cool to see.”
Sirius smiled. “We’ll go then, once the album is released and the book is finished. I think that the Nordic countries are probably better in summer.”
Remus was quiet for a moment. And when he spoke, he was saying what Sirius had wanted to say, he supposed he was just braver. “So after the book and the album, what will, will we . . .?”
“Yes, Moons,” he whispered. “I mean we’re married, we’re going to stay together.”
“I have to—my job is in New York.”
“That’s fine,” Sirius said easily. “I’ll live with you in New York when you have to be there, we can get an apartment. And when I have to be with the band and you don’t have to be in New York, you can come back here.”
His arms tightened around him more. “That sounds nice, Sirius.”
“Nice, sure, but do you think it’ll work?”
He sighed. “Objectively yes, but my assignments, depending on what I get, could take me anywhere. I could be gone for months.”
Sirius leaned forward and kissed his chest. “We’ll make it work. Who knows, maybe the book will be successful enough and you could write your own books, whatever you want. You could write the next great American novel.”
Remus chuckled. “Maybe.” He paused. “You really want to live together?”
“We sort of are now, aren’t we?” Sirius said. “And it would be like the hotel room, constantly, our—”
“ Own little world ,” he finished.
He smiled. “Yep. We can start looking for apartments soon.”
He hummed. “That sounds good baby.”