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Rain looked at Sky. His usually calm and quiet best friend seemed a bit fidgety and weird since the past couple of weeks. Rain had gone with Ajarn Wang’s team to Korea as an official translator and because of his interest in historical architecture from that region. That was two weeks ago. And before he left, Sky had been normal, excited even, waiting for news and photos. This was not that Sky. He had listened to Rain with half an ear, and Rain was not okay with that. He knew that Sky would not be jealous that he had gone, because that was not the kind of work that interested him. But this behaviour was really bizarre and suspicious, especially because he had been clingy! Sky was never clingy!
And it was not Sky alone whose behaviour was bothering him. His P’Phayu also seemed weird to him. Before he had gone, his Phi had been so thrilled for him, so delighted. He had come back gushing and had been met with strange looks, like P’Phayu wanted to say something to him and could not bring himself to. It was not that he was cold, or indifferent, or mean. On the contrary, he had smothered Rain with so much love and so many kisses, that had led to mind-blowing sex. And every day after that also, Phayu would hold him so damn close that he was afraid that he would be suffocated in his sleep. It was almost as if Phayu was afraid that Rain was going to leave him.
He wondered at first what had happened to his boyfriend and his best friend. Rain may have seemed like the most clueless person on the planet, but he was not as dumb as people thought him to be. And after seeing P’Pai last night when he had come to the garage to pick up his personal bike, Rain had understood a lot of things. But for now, he had more important things to worry about. “Ai’Sky?” he called out. “Hmm?” Sky hummed, before he realised that Rain was calling him and focused on him completely. “Why don’t we go eat something?” Rain asked, smiling. “You want me to make noodles for you?” Sky looked at him hopefully. Sky hated sharing his food. Rain smirked a bit at that. “Nope,” he said, popping the ‘p’. “I want to go eat noodle soup at the stall near your dorm,” Rain said, dragging Sky up.
As Rain stood at the stall waiting for the food, Sky sent a quick text off to Pai. “I can’t take this anymore Phi. Please tell P’Phayu to do something. Rain is my best friend!” “I got your back baby!” Pai’s reply was swift. He was sitting with Phayu, both with a drink in their hand. “Sky is getting frustrated. You need to do something Ai’Yu. If anything happens, and if Rain moves away from Sky or you, it’s going to break me as well. You know that right?” he asked. Phayu put his head in his hands. “What should I do? How do I tell him? I feel like scum!” he said. “We all do. We broke his trust. I know how much you love him, I know how much Sky loves him, and I care a great deal about him. But we need to get this out of the way. This way, no one is gonna be happy,” Pai said, trying to be the voice of reason.
Phayu nodded, squaring his shoulders. He was mortally afraid of what Rain would say or do when he got to know the truth. Rain held Phayu’s entire being in his small little hands. Losing him would break Phayu like nothing else had done. Till today, he had not forgotten the paralysing fear that he had felt when Stop had kidnapped Rain. He had forgone pride for his beautiful boy, and he would do so again and again, because without Rain, there was no Phayu. Rain would always say, where there is a storm, there is rain. But for Phayu, Rain was his heart and soul and without heart, without soul, there would be no body. But he was determined. Today was the day. He had put it off long enough. It was time to rip the bandages, expose the wounds and bear the consequences.
When he reached home, he called out to Rain. “I am in the bedroom Phi,” his voice flitting downstairs. He was shocked when he entered the bedroom. Rain sat on the edge of the bed, in a white shirt, Phayu’s white shirt, no less and pouting. Normally Phayu would have jumped him as soon as he saw this look on him, but not today. Today there was a stone in his heart and he knew that nothing would be resolved if he first made love to his boy. So first things first. Phayu knelt down in front of Rain. Rain was shocked. He had seen Phayu kneel only once. In front of Stop. To save Rain. Seeing his Phi kneel was something of a blow to Rain. He had hoped never to see him like this again. “Phi?” he whispered brokenly, reaching out to Phayu. “Don’t touch me yet Rain. If you do, I will lose every bit of courage I have garnered today,” Phayu said, hearing his own broken whine. Rain withdrew his hand.
“What is it Phi?” Rain’s voice came out different, like he was trying to be strong for both of them. “I made a mistake Rain, the biggest mistake of my life,” Phayu said, still looking down. “What did you do Phi?” Rain asked, still calm. “Rain, the weekend you went to Korea, Pai, Sky and I went drinking. Sky and I were missing you and Pai went along for the ride. But we got a little too drunk. And since the bar was near the garage, we ended up crashing there. And..,” Phayu trailed off, choking, unable to continue. How could he tell his sweet boy that he had cheated on him with his best friend and Phayu’s best friend as well? “What happened Phi?” Rain asked gently and Phayu felt his hand in his hair.
“We slept together Rain!” The confession burst out of Phayu. “It was a one-time thing baby, and we really regretted it since. I hate myself already baby. All of us do. So at least don’t hate me Rain. I beg you! I will die if you leave me Rain!” Tears poured unchecked from Phayu’s eyes. The silence stretched for so long that if Phayu hadn’t been able to see Rain’s feet in front of him, he would have thought Rain had walked out. He closed his eyes, waiting for words of rejection. He would do anything to gain his boy’s trust back. He would do.. His thoughts trailed off when he felt Rain cupping his cheeks and wiping his tears. He opened his eyes in shock and saw Rain smile softly at him.
“Silly Phi!” he chided gently. “Phi, I know you. And I know Sky. Did you both really think you could hide it from me? I was just waiting for you to tell me,” Rain said, pecking Phayu’s lips. “Rain?” Phayu whispered wonderingly. All the merits he had done had finally become successful. His boy.. He couldn’t form a coherent thought. “How was it Phi? The three of you together?” Rain asked curiously. “What?” Phayu asked, shaking his head. He was very confused. “If three was fun, I wonder how four would be? We should try it Phi. Imagine how I will be pampered by all three of you for not waiting for me and your guilt,” Rain’s eyes sparkled with mischief and Phayu stared at him in wonder.
“Is that what you want Rain?” he asked. “Phi, while it is true that you were the first for me in every way, both Sky and I have loved each other for a long time. And I also know you and P’Pai have had a long history together. I always wondered why we never tried to explore this and I am not going to wonder about that now. Right now, what you need to do is tell me if you are okay with it,” Rain asked, still cupping Phayu’s cheeks and looking into his eyes. He loved his Phi and he knew that Phayu would never hurt him knowingly. Neither would Sky and by extension nor would Pai. But he didn’t want to keep the love he had always felt for Sky and that he had started feeling for P’Pai, in his heart anymore. If they were all willing, he wanted to try this out. What he had thought of a dream, he finally wanted to make it a possibility!