Work Text:
“Hey Lucy. How was your appointment?” Angela asks as Lucy slowly makes her way back to her desk.
“It was fine. Everything’s fine.” Lucy tells her. Angela leaves it alone because Lucy’s thirty two weeks pregnant and miserable. Then Tim couldn’t make this appointment and Lucy sobbed when she found out.
“The baby is still measuring much bigger than expected and I am freaking out. Tim couldn’t make it and I feel like a damn whale.” Lucy huffs out in frustration. “Sorry Ange. It’s not your fault.”
“Hey. I’ve been there Lucy. I get it.” Lucy gives a small smile before Angela’s called away. This little girl, their daughter, a small piece of them, was the biggest surprise of their life. They had been dating a year and a half when Lucy realized she was late. She thought it was stress. She made detective and they were buying their first house.
Tim cried the happiest tears and can’t wait to be a girl dad. Lucy’s been nervous the whole time about being a good mom. She is petrified, but she’s also excited. It’s earlier than expected, but they can’t wait for their daughter to arrive. The thing is Tim’s very tall and their daughter is taking after him. Lucy is terrified of the birth and has needed Tim’s support. She hates being so needy and emotional, but he’s her partner.
Lucy gets up for a bathroom break and starts walking towards Tim’s office. He isn’t there and Lucy frowns in confusion. She decides to head for the food trucks since she didn’t eat lunch. As she rounds the corner to get her newest craving, she sees Tim. He’s sitting at a table, laughing and having a grand time with Isabel. His ex-wife. Why is her with her? Is this why he didn’t come to my appointment?
Lucy quickly turns around before being seen and rushes to the nearest bathroom. She slams the stall and stifles a sob. She feels sick to her stomach. She collapses to her knees and throws up whatever is in her system. Lucy already feels like she is not good enough for Tim. Now she feels huge and feels super insecure every day. She knows their daughter is growing, but no matter what she does, she expands. It’s hard seeing your body change so much.
Lucy has never felt this way, but his exes are blonde, skinny, and just gorgeous. Tim has never said anything differently, but he has seen different body types. She has worried about him wanting her, but he skipped this appointment to be with Isabel. The appointment that could be her on bed rest potentially. She’s on desk duty already, but her doctor is concerned about her blood pressure. Dr. Walker doesn’t want to see any complications. She told Lucy that she would be on bed rest until she delivers.
Lucy had Aaron bring her back to the station because he was the only one who could take her. She needed to finish a few files and talk to Tim. Now, she was in the bathroom, throwing up and causing more stress.
Celina picks that moment to walk in. She sees Lucy walk out and offers her a hand. “Can you help me to my desk?” Lucy asks weakly. Celina nods and walks her to her chair.
Carradine walks over as he sees Lucy fall in the chair. “What are you doing here? Your doctor called me to tell me you need to be on bed rest.” Lucy knew that was happening.
“I just needed to finish a few files and grab my things.” Lucy says smoothly. He shakes his head.
“Sorry Chen. Home you go. Angela will drive you.” Lucy wants to cry. It’s bad enough she’s on bed rest, but now Tim will really not want her.
“Don’t tell Tim.” Lucy says shortly as they start driving.
“Lucy-“
“No Ange. I cannot handle it right now.” She wipes those pesky few tears away.
“What’s wrong?” Angela pries because she knows Lucy.
“I saw Tim having lunch with Isabel. He cancelled on me for her. She’s so much prettier and they had this whole life Angela. He’s going to leave me for her.” Angela feels awful because her friend is so upset. “Don’t say anything to him. I mean it Angela.”
“I promise Lucy.” She says as she pulls into their driveway.
“Don’t worry. I got it from here.” Lucy slams the door and gets inside as quickly as possible. She heads to their room and changes into one of Tim’s shirts because nothing fits well and her body hurts. She lays in bed, crying herself to sleep. This was her life for at least six to nine more weeks. Lucy wasn’t sure how to get through it.
Tim says goodbye to Isabel. She came to settle one final thing from their divorce. There was property they had to deal with and it was easier done in person. He hated missing Lucy’s appointment, but he wanted this done once and for all.
Tim walks inside and heads to his office not seeing Lucy. He has no missed texts or calls which is odd, but it happens. He tries to call and it goes straight to voicemail. Before anything else can be done, he’s pulled into an afternoon training that slipped his mind.
At the end of shift, he doesn’t see Lucy. He sees Carradine. “Hey. Have you seen Lucy?” Tim wonders.
“You don’t know? She’s been placed on bed rest until the baby is born. If you need anything, let us know.” With that he scurried off leaving Tim confused. He runs to his truck and makes his way home. The house is dark and he quietly walks upstairs. He sees Lucy asleep in their bed.
Tim sits down on the edge of the bed while moving hair out of her face. Lucy stirs and sees Tim. The days events flood her mind and she turns over. “I’m tired.” Is all she says.
“Why didn’t you tell me Lucy?”
Lucy turns around so fast feeling herself getting stressed. “I tried to Tim! Then I saw you with Isabel.” Lucy doesn’t hide the venom in her voice. Tim’s face drops.
“Lucy, listen.”
“No Tim. This was a big deal today. I get you have to work sometimes, but this? You’re gorgeous, healthy, skinny, blonde ex wife shows up and you drop everything. I get it Tim I do. I don’t want me either, especially now, but I needed you. I know we aren’t bound by any papers, but this is your daughter too. I’m a whale and now I’m going to be even more difficult with bed rest.” Lucy feels defeated. She doesn’t blame Tim for wanting Isabel and not her. They had this whole life together. Now Lucy’s not herself and can’t even do anything for herself.
Tim’s face drops and his heart hurts. “Lucy, baby, look at me.” She can’t bring herself to do it. “Isabel needed to settle one last thing with the divorce. We had some things to divide up. Baby, I don’t want her. She was my past and you are my future. You’re pregnant. I know you’re not feeling yourself and you’re vulnerable, but you are the most gorgeous woman I’ve laid eyes on.” Lucy scoffs at that and goes to turn away. “Stop trying to hide from me.”
“Really Tim? How do you think I feel? You can do so much better than me. The looks women give me when I’m with you, they hurt. Isabel had all of you for so long.” She lets a sob out she’s been holding.
“Lucy you are all I have eyes for. I don’t want Isabel. You do not need to feel insecure around me baby. You’re growing our daughter every single day. I know it’s hard which is why I’m trying to do what I can for you. I’m sorry I haven’t done the best job.”
“I’m scared of losing you. Of you not wanting me.” Lucy finally lets out and the tears don’t stop once they start.
“Oh baby. I’m not going anywhere. He puts his hands on each side of her head. You won’t lose me. I promise it was nothing with Isabel. I’m sorry I missed the appointment, but it’s her last day in town. She knows we are together. Lucy she has so much respect for you. Do you trust me?” Lucy nods hesitantly. Tim holds her because right now she needs it. His hands gently rub up and down her body. His hands rests on her belly feeling their daughter kick away.
Lucy finally relaxes into his touch. “I’m sorry Tim. I’m just so stressed and she’s already measuring big. I’m terrified of having to deliver. The weight wont seem to stop. I can’t see my feet and everything aches.”
“Let me take care of you. I won’t leave you. I’m on leave for the next twelve to fifteen weeks depending when she’s born. I’m not leaving you.”
Lucy is surprised, but grateful. “You took all that time? To help?” He hates hearing the uncertainty in her voice. Tim nods and kisses her forehead. He starts rubbing Lucy’s feet before moving up her legs and moving to her back. He gives her a full body massage to hopefully help with the achiness.
By the end Lucy’s stripped down to just her panties. Tim kisses her golden brown skin in every place imaginable. “I love you Lucy. I love your body. I love every single piece of you. You. Kiss. Are. Kiss. Beautiful. I’ve got you.”
“Thank you Tim.” She whispers. He can feel the tension start to leave her body. Lucy knows Tim loves her, but she is still worried. Tim can see she has something to say.
“What is it?” He nudges her.
“Nothing.” She says and he gives her his TO look. “Do you not want to marry me?” She turns away as she says it.
“What? Of course I do. Why would you think I wouldn’t?”
“I’m pregnant, we have a house, but you never asked.”
“Luce. I know you would think it’s for her which it isn’t. I was trying to give you space to work it out.” Damnit this man knows her too well. “I’ve had a ring since after our second first date.” Lucy gasps.
Tim rolls out of bed and pads to the closet. He grabs something off the top shelf and brings it to the bed. He throws it to her. Lucy gasps at the ring inside. It’s a small moonstone engagement ring. It’s perfect.
“Tim -“ Lucy cries.
“Lucy I would have married you years ago if I could. You are everything I want and more. You’re the best thing to happen to me. My light. Marry me?” He says with the goofiest grin on his face.
“Yes Tim. Always yes.” She kisses him. “Thank you. For loving me, reassuring me and supporting me. I’m sorry about today. I just don’t feel like myself and with everything else I snapped.”
“You’re allowed to. I’ve got you and I need you to know that. Isabel is my past. We would have never made it. It’s always been you baby. I love you.” He kisses her before curling into her back and holding her close. They will always be okay as long as they’re together.