Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It was safe to say that Teru, just like all of the other nights he has spent in this hell hole, slept like shit.

After he had eaten like an animal and made a fool of himself in front of Kageyama, Serizawa, Suzuki, and probably even Nomura, Teru was left dealing with not only the repercussions of his lost battle but also a nasty fever.

He lay on the icy floor, his skin and blood boiling while the pressure behind his head grew stronger. He had flipped up the back of his sweater to let his skin rest against the tile, but somehow he still had enough dignity to not be willing to take off his sweater and pants in front of Kageyama.

He numbly thought that it was strange how he knows his name now. 

Shigeo Kageyama. 

It makes him more… real.

He’s a real kid. He’s not just some moving animatronic to intimidate Teru, he’s a real person. Who…has thoughts and a voice, despite what he wants Teru to believe. 

Nothing much had gone on with him after he had asked Teru to eat the food. He just went back to his bed until their next meal was delivered.

Teru decided that he would spare Kageyama the panic of asking him to eat again, so Teru swallowed his pride and choked down the food. Now that he wasn’t starving as much, it was quite possibly the most horrible thing that he had ever had to ingest. His taste buds revolted, and he plugged his nose as he forced himself through it in the hopes of making it better.

He laid himself back down on the icy tile to try and help regulate his body heat as soon as he was finished, but he barely had any rest before his mouth filled with saliva and he was racing off to the restroom.

Somehow, it didn’t taste as bad the second time.

He spent a fair amount of time hacking away in there, sweat dripping off his nose and splashing into the toilet water as his gag reflex had the time of its life. By the time he was finally able to get his stomach under control, he leaned back on his folded legs before he lost balance and fell back entirely, his head clunking against the tile. He groaned softly and blinked up at the shower faucet above him and remembered the ice-cold water. 

So then he took a surprisingly long shower— after cleaning the bathroom tile again just to make sure that there was no leftover blood. 

He went ahead and washed himself off, glaring at the bruises from his fight with Serizawa. The one that annoyed him the most was the deep purple and black mark that made him look like he had gotten slammed with a bat across his waist. Which, to be fair, was basically what happened. It stretched along his middle, curving upwards towards his chest. Within the discolored mess were spots where bursted blood vessels decorated like freckles. It was painful to even graze his hand across, and as he moved around, he could feel the skin ache as it stretched.

Eventually, his legs grew weak and he lowered himself to the floor. He let the limp stream of water rain down on his burning head, the icy liquid trickling down his back and sending chills down his spine despite his fiery insides.

When he finally felt like he had cooled down, he shook himself off and begrudgingly got back into his clothes from before. He had yet to have been given a change of clothes—

—Which made him remember the clothes he had been wearing before this mess had been stolen, and he mumbled several curses as he pulled back on his sweatpants.

“Whatever,” he grumbled, shoving his foot through the pant leg. “Not like those were my favorite jeans. Not like I got a good deal on them.”

Then that reminded him of his roots, and he grabbed onto the sink and peered into the mirror as he shoved his bangs back. He looked past the bruising on his forehead and his tired eyes and instead focused on his hairline. The brown was barely visible, he knew that. When he was first kidnapped, he was five days out from getting it redone, and by looking at it now, he was pretty sure that he had missed his appointment.

Ok, well. Five days isn’t that bad. Five days is almost nothing.

Wait, how long did he sleep after the battle with Serizawa? He was pretty sure that had been his three-day mark, so…. Did he sleep through a full day? More than a full day?! And still got a fucking failure fever?!

Teru angrily brushed his bangs down and stomped out of the bathroom.

Kageyama was in his bed, and if it weren’t for his empty tray on the floor, Teru would’ve thought that he hadn’t moved at all. He hadn’t eaten his food in front of him yet, aside from the time that Teru left the bathroom on his first or second day here and saw him shoveling his food in his mouth. Maybe he got embarrassed about eating in front of people..?

Whatever, Teru doesn’t care.

He glanced around, searching the bare room for something to occupy him but… well. There’s nothing. So he decided that he’d just suck it up and get back in bed. Nothing was happening, and he didn’t have anything to do to keep him occupied. He’d just. 

Sit there. 

Maybe think about life?

Dammit.

Life is boring when you’re kidnapped.

-

Teru wasn’t sure how long it was until a Claw worker came in for him. He knew it was six meals though, so potentially three days. However, as Teru thought about it more, they probably fed him and Kageyama at inconsistent times. Yeah, the passage of time was already a mess in his mind, but he was realizing that sometimes the wait time between meals was unpredictable. And it would be an easy way to mess up their sanity some more.

Which Teru was beginning to realize. His mind was running around in circles, constantly running out of things to think about. He could only replay so many movies in his mind before the locked away box of memories and feelings titled ‘pretend they don’t exist’ got dangerously close to existing again. And then thinking about those only made him feel worse.

His eyes were almost constantly burning from the brightness of the room and he was starting to feel old and stale underneath the lighting. His muscles were tired despite not being used, but he couldn’t find a lot of reason to get up and do something.

Eventually, he was starting to wonder when it would be his turn to leave the room rather than Kageyama. Even though he realized that it wasn’t good when you left the room.

Within the six meals, Kageyama was taken out four times. 

The first time was relatively quick, and he came back with no injuries. Just even more unresponsive than usual. His eyes were glazed over and his hair swung limply as he lugged himself forward, each step taking at least fifteen seconds to complete before he collapsed in his bed. He didn’t even bother to cover himself with his blanket.

Teru had felt pretty bad about that, especially when Kageyama had started shivering, so he decided to give up his blanket for a few hours. It took him probably an hour to make that decision though, going back and forth between telling himself that he needed his blanket too and didn’t want it to get dirty from him, and between the scene of Kageyama asking him to eat replaying in his mind. 

What really did it though was Nomura’s words from however long ago. ‘I'd say that you’d fit in well with Claw.’

A Claw member probably wouldn’t give up their blanket for an exhausted and definitely abused kid, would they? Nope. So Teru gave him his blanket.

He draped it over his shoulders and was…kind of surprised at his unresponsiveness. Kageyama, despite hiding under his covers, seemed to be fully aware and on the defensive at all times. He wondered what they did to make him so tired.

The second time he came back, he didn’t seem to be physically hurt. He just came back and was attacking his escort, wrapping around him like a feral cat.

Teru watched as the door opened gracelessly, completely in shock as the worker fell inside. Kageyama was climbing him and almost growling as he scratched at his skin and tugged at his clothes. The man yelled before grabbing Kageyama’s hair and yanking him off. He swung the flailing boy before sending Kageyama flying into the wall opposite of them.

Teru winced as he watched Kageyama smack against the metal before crumpling to the ground in a heap, his hair shrouding his head.

He glanced back at the man and saw that he had blood dripping down his hands from the insides of his sleeves. He shot a nasty look at Teru and stomped out, slamming the door behind him.

The blond sat frozen still, not really wanting to have to deal with an insane version of Kageyama. He wondered if that’s where the description ‘feisty’ came from.

But he’s so…docile. 

Teru blinked at his limp body, trying to ignore the guilt crawling up his spine. 

Kageyama’s a real person. And they’re treating him so… so much worse than what Teru’s getting.

Some sick, twisted part of him wondered why he wasn’t getting such awful treatment. Was he not powerful enough to warrant that? Did they think less of him for some reason? Or…was he more powerful? And they were treating him better because Teru is better?

And then he cursed himself out because seriously, what the hell? He shouldn’t have a complex about this. This is Claw he’s talking about. He doesn’t want them to think anything about him other than that he’s intimidating and terrifying and they should leave him the fuck alone.

Except they don’t. So he’s kind of stuck.

The third time Kageyama left, he missed their meal. And came back bloody.

He stumbled inside their room as the door shut behind him, his hollow eyes staring blankly ahead. His hands were held out in front of him, holding neatly folded, fresh clothes. Probably to make up for his sweater and sweatpants that were ripped and torn. The skin that Teru could see through the holes as he limped towards the restroom was raw and pink, with what might’ve been puncture wounds. It looked like he had gotten attacked by vines.

He took a long shower, and when he came back, Teru switched with him so he would eat his food. 

Unsurprisingly, the bathroom was a bit of a mess. There was blood staining the shower floor and he had left destroyed clothes in a clump on the floor. Black hair was sticking to the wall of the shower and some strands found themselves in the watered-down red.

But Teru didn’t have the heart to be annoyed about it and instead cleaned it as best as he could.

When he came out, he saw that Kageyama had eaten his food and was back in bed, trembling violently under his blanket.

Teru paused outside of the bathroom, staring at him as his heart twisted. He felt like he should do something…he just didn’t know what.

And then the sixth meal came and passed.

Neither Teru nor Kageyama were doing anything. Both just sleeping in their respective beds. Like they always do.

Teru was starting to get to the point where he was scratching his fingernail against his pillow, playing the rhythm of whatever song was stuck in his head. At the moment, it was Barbie Girl.

He was going insane.

A loud click interrupted him mid-chorus and both he and Kageyama rolled over to look at the door. Teru made quick eye contact with him before he ducked back down. Teru frowned and turned to watch the door slide open, wondering if it would be for him or Kageyama. As much as he didn’t want it to be for him, he figured Kageyama would like a break.

Judging by who came in, it was for him.

“Oh, good. You’re still alive,” Nomura said, his face perfectly neutral. He kept his hands in his pockets as he crossed the room, the door slowly shutting behind him.

Teru sat up more and narrowed his eyes at him. “Didn’t think I’d survive?” Why did all of these Claw people think that he was weak? He’s perfectly strong, he’s just— he’s just being put in situations where he’s set up for failure!

Nomura raised an eyebrow, looking him up and down. “Did you fight Serizawa or Suzuki?” He stopped in front of Teru’s bed and crossed his arms, staring down his nose at him.

Teru pressed his lips together and laid down again, snuggling his cheek into the rock-hard pillow. He closed his eyes as he waved a hand out from under his blanket. “Serizawa. Easy stuff.”

“Uh-huh…” Nomura pulled the blanket off of Teru.

“Hey—”

“I thought you lost,” Nomura continued, shaking out Teru’s blanket as he glared at him.

Teru shivered as the man folded Teru’s cover neatly, narrowing his eyes at him. “Losing is relative.”

“I have access to all the security footage, you know–“

“I didn’t—”

“And that sure looked like a loss.” The man corrected, inhaling deeply. Teru got the sense that he was stifling a yawn. Teru averted his gaze and scowled, resulting in a loud sigh from Nomura. “Serizawa’s hard to beat. No one expected you to win.”

The back of Teru’s neck burned and he frowned, pulling his legs up to his chest. “That doesn't make me feel any better.”

Teru was supposed to win. He’s— he always thought he was the strongest but clearly he…wasn’t. Which made his blood grow hot and an ice-cold shower sound good.

Nomura rested the folded blanket on the foot of Teru’s bed before slipping his hands into his suit pockets. He glanced over at Kageyama, who was faithfully watching their interaction. “Suzuki sure did a number on him,” he muttered under his breath. He turned back to Teru. “How’s he been holding up?”

Teru followed his gaze over, scrunching his nose. “Does he ever get a break?”

“Ehh.” Nomura pulled his hand out of his pocket and looked at his watch. “Well, you know the drill. Time to head out.”

Teru twisted his hands into his sheets. “So are you my designated escort now or what?”

“Depends,” Nomura replied, making his way toward the door. “Could get a promotion soon, actually.”

“So no more standing by a door with a badge?” Teru asked, not making any moves to get out of bed.

“No, I’d probably still have to do that,” he muttered, pressing his hand against the door before pulling it open. “Out of bed.”

Teru ran a hand through his bangs, rubbing his hair between his fingers. He wondered if Nomura could see his roots. “Or you’ll zap me?”

“Yeah, basically.”

Teru sighed and got off his mattress, each step towards the door full of dread. He looked over at Kageyama, who was watching with wide eyes. Teru wondered if he was thinking about how differently he was treated too. Nomura wasn’t harsh with him compared to the men and women who took Kageyama.

He kind of wished that Kageyama could take his place right now and that he wouldn’t have to be injured.

And then he…kind of felt bad about that way of thinking.

Teru stopped at the entrance of the door, ignoring Nomura’s dull look and keeping his eyes on his roommate. He put his arm in the air before waving it widely, inhaling loudly. “Bye, Kageyama!” He exclaimed, causing him to immediately duck under the covers. 

Nomura raised an eyebrow at him as Teru left the room and stood to the side. “You two friends now?” He asked as he shut the door, tapping his card against the keypad to lock it. 

Teru shrugged, crossing his arms at the taller man. “If we’re stuck with each other, we might as well talk.”

Nomura thought about it for a moment before shrugging. He tucked his hands back in his pockets and made his way towards the elevator. “So you’ve gotten him to talk then?”

Teru pressed his lips together, taking long strides to catch up with him. He wasn’t going to be walking behind him. He had to prove that he still had some dignity. “A little.” Though only because Kageyama didn’t want Teru to waste away in the same room as him.

“Hm.”

Nomura tapped the keycard against the elevator panel and the door slid open. Teru followed him in, wondering if there would be any more conversation between them. But then the jazz began to play and both of them seemed to slip into their own worlds.

As he left his room more and more, he made sure to keep track of the things he would need to know in order to escape.

His door seemed to only unlock from the outside, and it had to be locked again. It didn’t lock automatically when the door shut, or else the grunts wouldn’t be able to take him or Kageyama out after they shut the door. So someone would have to unlock it from the outside, come in, and then Teru would have to escape.

After that, he’d need a code to get into the elevator. 

Teru’s eyes slid over to Nomura’s hand in his pocket and wondered about his keycard. He assumed there were different codes for each door or type of lock, so he’d either have to find a way to memorize them all or get a master keycard like Nomura’s seemed to have.

Nomura yawned loudly and Teru looked away from his pocket. He watched as the man ruffled his salt and pepper hair, wondering if he could get away with asking any questions. 

“So are you always gonna be the guy bringing me around?” Teru interrupted the jazz as the elevator lurched into motion, going up a level.

He shrugged and leaned back against the elevator wall, his droopy eyes watching the red numbers slowly go up. “Depends on your behavior and how willing you are to join Claw.”

“So the more willing I become, the less I’ll get to see of you?” 

The door pinged and swung open. Nomura stepped in front of Teru before leading the way out, blocking his sight. “The more unwilling you become, actually,” he corrected, his voice low as he left the elevator.

Teru clenched his jaw and exited, leaving behind the awful music. He was pretty sure that once he was out of this place, he’d never be able to listen to jazz again. 

But more unwilling? Teru’s already severely unwilling to join. How can he become more unwilling? Like…Kageyama level? But he tends to leave pretty calmly— unless the person provokes him immediately. He doesn’t seem all that unwilling.

Though he has been here longer.

Did he start off with a guy like Nomura?

His thoughts once again trailed off when he looked around the small room they entered. It looked similar to a doctor’s waiting office, with beige walls and several cushiony seats down the middle of the room and on the sides. On round coffee tables were newspapers and magazines, all looking somewhat outdated. Further in was the counter where a man and a woman were behind, both in a serious-looking discussion.

“I’m completely healthy,” Teru told Nomura as the elevator closed behind them. Nomura looked at him from the corner of his eye while Teru looked around, shifting uncomfortably. “I don’t need to see a doctor.”

Nomura stopped in the middle of the room and sat down in one of the seats, patting the cushion next to him. “It’s not that.”

Teru looked over at the two people behind the desk, wondering if either of them would address them. As if in response to his thoughts, the two walked out of sight and left Teru and Nomura seemingly alone in the waiting area. 

Teru swallowed thickly before forcing himself to sit down next to Nomura. The room was uncomfortably cold. He tapped his fingers on his knee, hunching forward while Nomura lunged back. “What is it then?”

Nomura crossed his legs and swung his arms over the back of the seat, clearly unbothered by the situation. “It’s kind of like a check-up, actually. If I recall correctly, it’s less of a physical check-up on you,” he added, looking at Teru through lidded eyes, “since we all know you’re not in tip-top shape right now.” 

Teru bristled, trying to think of a way to soothe his pride while Nomura continued. “It’s to get a basis on your abilities and to see what areas you're weak in.”

The blond scoffed, clenching his fists. Getting beaten doesn’t mean that he’s not strong. 

Nomura groaned loudly and Teru jolted, unprepared for the sudden burst of emotion. “Teruki,” he sighed, rolling his head over to make lazy eye contact with him. “You just got your ass whooped by another esper who is worlds stronger than you. In fact, from what I hear, you already got beaten by Suzuki too. Why do you think that you keep losing?”

Teru scowled at him, hating that his face carried no more emotion than disinterest. “Because each time I’ve been forced to fight, I’ve just come out of a sucky situation, like being attacked on the street, or not eating any food, or just suffering from the general abuse of those around me!”

Nomura nodded as he talked, his stupid customer service grin slipping onto his lips despite his dead eyes. “Mmhm. You know, you should try to consider accepting that you’re weaker than the other people here. It might do you some good.”

The back of Teru’s neck burned and his ears turned red. He gritted his teeth and ducked his chin, deepening his glare. “If this collar wasn’t on my neck, I could kill you, you know,” he hissed, vile dripping off his tongue. “I could harm almost anyone here. And then I could take your stupid keycard and get the hell out of here before anyone could stop me.” He inhaled through his teeth, the air warping around his aura in his neck. “I’m not weak.”

Nomura’s smile fell and for a second, a real emotion flickered in his eyes. It kind of looked like… disappointment?

Teru reeled back in his seat, giving him a strange look as Nomura turned away and went back to staring at the wall ahead of him.

What— what was that for? Teru didn’t do anything! Why make that face? He didn’t— why is he disappointed in him?!? That's something only parents are supposed to feel towards kids, not some stranger! Besides? He didn’t do anything wrong! He just told the truth!

His chest heaved and he snapped his head away from Nomura, seething at the ground while his skin crawled. His aura deep in his neck bulged and pressed against his innards, crawling up his throat like bile and seeping into his chest like heartburn. 

“Teruki,” Nomura said, his voice low and empty. “You—“

“I don’t need any sort of lesson from you,” Teru cut him off, turning his head away. His messy hair tickled the back of his neck and cheeks, sending his nerves on fire as the heat spread to his shoulders. 

Nomura tapped his foot on the ground absently. “I’m a security guard, not a teacher,” he corrected lazily. 

“I don’t care.”

There was a long pause and Teru ducked his head, the quiet of the waiting room settling in. He could hear a clock ticking from behind the desk and he briefly wondered what time of day it was, or if the clock had a calendar feature. He studied the grout between the tile on the floor, trying to focus on anything rather than the uncomfortably itching underneath his sweater and his burning skin and scalp.

…he might’ve taken it too far by threatening to kill Nomura.

He should’ve just said beaten him up or something, not that he could take away his life in the blink of an eye.

But… but he’s a bad guy. So why does Teru feel bad..?

Nomura sighed, causing Teru to glance his way. “Don’t be like them,” Nomura said quietly, a strange tone in his voice that Teru couldn’t identify wafting through. “Threats don’t mean anything to me. And you’re frustrated, I understand. But do not overestimate your own abilities or else you won’t be able to get out.”

Teru blinked before turning back to Nomura. “What do you—“

The door next to the desk flung open and a woman in a white lab coat walked out, her eyes stuck on her clipboard. “Teruki Hanazawa?” His heart skipped a beat at his name and he flinched.

Nomura stood up and strode over to her. “He’s here and ready. Hasn’t eaten for a day, like requested.”

Teru stalled and glanced between the two, his stomach churning on command. A day? It had been a full day since the sixth meal? There’s no— he thought it was breakfast and then dinner but twenty-four hours at least? What— what the hell?! How does time even work here? And— That means Kageyama didn’t get to eat either!

“Thank you,” the woman said, bowing her head to him before turning to Teruki. She seemed like she would get along well with Nomura, seeing how her face was even more emotionless than his. “Nice to meet you, Hanazawa. Please, follow me back.”

Teru’s lip pulled into a snarl as she left back into the room. “Do I have to?”

“You’ll be shocked to find out the answer,” Nomura replied, looking down at him lamely.

“You’re not funny,” Teru huffed. Then he swallowed his pride and stopped after her. Nomura followed closely behind, pulling the door shut with a soft thud.

Teru glanced around the hall, taking note of the two doors on the left and the lack of any on the right. At the end of the hall were two push doors, the only thing close to decoration being the keypad sitting on the right side. The plaster walls kept with the beige theme, making Teru more and more uneasy.

One of the best things about his parents leaving was that he never had to go to the doctor again. He wasn’t scared of it, he just had a strong distaste for it. The office was always too uncomfortably clean and bare, the people a bit too brisk and their gloves cold, and the sterile smell made the hairs in his nostrils burn.

He figured that after this he’d really hate the doctors.

“Why the lab coat?” He asked the girl as they neared the door, trying to distract himself.

“I’m a doctor,” she said seriously, looking back at him with an annoyed look.

Teru looked her up and down, narrowing his eyes. “Do you actually have an MD?” 

“Nope,” Nomura answered for her. “She’s a scientist and should’ve said that from the start.”

“Mr. Nomura,” she started, her voice darkening. “You know that we’re to refer to ourselves as doctors—“

“Yeah, but your background check says otherwise,” Nomura replied simply. Teru watched as he moved past the woman and tapped his keycard on the password panel. “No point in risking him seeing the code,” he explained, tucking the card back in his pocket while she lowered her hand.

The woman glowered but pushed past him and through the doors.

Nomura and Teru glanced at each other and the man brought back his dead grin. 

Teru didn’t share the sentiment. He followed the woman into the room, his stomach clenching in anticipation. 

One step in and he immediately felt sick.

They left the beige color scheme behind and switched it out for a much worse one. It was similar to the room that he fought Serizawa in, except this one’s tile and steel walls were a perfect white that made Teru’s clothes look gray. In the ceiling were small round light fixtures that blinded him each time he glanced up.

He looked to his left and watched as the woman made her way into two dual-swing wood doors. As she pushed them open, Teru saw a glance at what looked like a lab with several other people in coats hidden inside. Other than that, there was nothing in the room.

Teru swallowed thickly against the aura bulging in his throat. This room was smaller than the one where he fought Serizawa. Smaller than his and Kageyama’s room.

Teru clenched his teeth and took a step back before turning and trying to pull open the door behind him. Nomura stood to his side, studying his watch rather than Teru’s actions. “You’re not going to be able to get out—“

“What are they going to do to me?” Teru whispered, his voice tight as he turned back to the room. A check-up on his powers? What’s that supposed to mean? His powers work just fine, he doesn’t need anything like that.

Nomura looked over at the closed door before returning to Teru. “They’re going to put you to your mental limit and see how strong your powers can be,” he said quietly.

Teru’s aura pressed against the collar, stretching down into his sternum at the idea. “What does that mean?” He asked hoarsely, his skin crawling. “Mental limit? What does that–”

“You should know that psychic powers are connected to your emotions,” Nomura reminded him, his words empty. 

Teru bristled and glanced around the empty white room again, his heartbeat rising. “Why–”

“I’m not supposed to answer more.”

Teru ground his teeth before snapping to look up at Nomura. “Bullshit,” he hissed, dropping his voice. “You’ve talked so nonchalantly about this stupid place and all of their inner workings and only now do you decide to follow the rules?”

Nomura stared down at him, losing all sense of disinterest and exhaustion in exchange for such a stern look that Teru’s heart skipped a beat. “Not now,” he said slowly, furrowing his eyebrows at him.

Teru stared up at him in confusion before the doors swung open and the woman from before entered alongside a man with fluffy light brown hair and glasses. His pastel blue sweater had an image of a pigeon stuck on it, which made Teru wonder briefly where he had purchased it before his eyes got stuck on the small metal square he was carrying in his hand. “You’re Teruki then, hm?” 

Teru nodded stiffly, furrowing his eyebrows as he looked him up and down. This guy wasn’t intimidating. Nomura and the doctor were towering over him, and he was about the same height as Teru. And he was wearing a pigeon sweater. He wasn’t scared of him in the slightest.

The man hummed, smiling. “Good, nice to meet you then,” he said lightly, pushing his glasses up his nose. He strode across the room before standing directly in front of Teruki. “Turn around for me, please.”

Teru bit his lip and looked at Nomura, who had switched back into a more proper expression for a security guard. He just stared at Teru, not giving anything besides a slight nudge of his head while dropping his hands into his pockets.

Narrowing his eyes at him, Teru resisted the urge to step back or to try the door again. “Why?”

“I need to check your collar for a sec’,” he said, twirling his finger while his other hand cradled the small device. “Nomura will shock you if you don’t obey.”

Teru glared at all three of the people in the room before slowly turning around, knowing there wasn’t much point in fighting back. A hand unexpectedly brushed away the hair on his neck and Teru resisted the urge to shudder, hating how exposed he felt. 

Fingertips and nails tickled his skin around the collar as he heard the newcomer messing around with something. “Seems to be in working order,” the man said, his voice uncomfortably close. He tapped the icy metal and a quick shock raced through Teru, causing him to muffle a yelp. The man snorted before patting Teru’s back. “Suzuki sure does like to have that set high, doesn’t he?”

Teru clenched his fists at his side, wondering if now would be an okay time to punch someone. Instead, he whipped his hand up and scratched at the back of his neck, hoping to get rid of the irritated feeling– Except his fingers caught on a new metal patch attached to his skin just below his hairline.

He turned around and watched as the man turned to the doctor. “He’s ready now. I’m going to go in the back to make sure the information flows correctly.”

What does that mean?

“Thank you, Mr. Hatori,” the doctor said with a quick bow. She turned back to Teruki and looked him up and down. Teru shifted under her gaze, unable to stand the feeling of her eyes probing him. “Mr. Nomura, would you mind restraining him for a moment?”

Teru’s eyes widened and this time he took a quick step away from both of them. “ Why?” He repeated, his aura swelling and slicing into his ribs. He might’ve been comforted that he could feel his aura expanding out from the ball in his neck, but instead, it felt like fire, burning his insides as it pushed against the barrier. 

“Because you’re going to resist, as you already are seeming to,” she told him, turning on her heel. “Just a moment, Mr. Nomura.”

Nomura nodded before meeting Teru’s gaze. Teru was already backing away from him, his heart hammering in his ribs as he tried to figure out what was going on. 

“It’d be easier for us both if you came here,” Nomura said calmly, his face blank. 

Teru gritted his teeth before glancing at the swinging doors that the doctor kept coming in and out of. There probably were powerful people in there, but there had to be some sort of exit, right? It’d probably only delay this but—

“Teruki.”

Chills ran down Teru’s spine at Nomura’s tone and he turned, watching as the man took a slow step toward him. “Don’t make this difficult.”

Teru inhaled sharply before he threw himself forward, barreling towards the double doors. There would have to be something he could fight with, he could do something to get out, right?!

He barely crossed the room before Nomura slammed into him from the side, his stuck-out arm digging into Teru’s stomach as he folded over it. He grunted before Nomura lurched behind him. His hands wrapped around his biceps and tugged him straight up and close to his chest, restricting much movement. Teru glared up at him as he tried to pull away while Nomura stared at him with some muted emotion. 

“You’re an asshole!” Teru snapped at him, stomping his foot onto Nomura’s shoe. He watched the man wince but his grip didn’t falter. 

“Just following my orders,” he said, his voice quiet and dull.

Teru’s eyes searched his before the doors swung open and the woman returned, this time with blue gloves pulled over her hands. She was carrying an average-sized shot, holding it up to the light and checking the level of liquid on the inside. She squirted a little bit of the liquid out onto her gloves before wiping it off on her jacket.

Teru’s heart lurched and he tried to pull himself away from Nomura again before slamming his head back and into the man’s collarbone. Nomura’s breathing hitched but aside from that he gave no reaction. Damn this guy! 

“I’m completely healthy and up to date on all of my vaccines, thank you!” Teru barked at the lady, panic rising up his throat. He may have lied to himself early about the doctors’ office, he was actually pretty uncomfortable when it came to shots—

“It’s not a vaccine,” she replied simply. She stopped in front of Teru before pulling out a swab. She nodded at Nomura and he slid his hand down Teru’s left arm, dragging the sweater down with it and stretching the collar to expose his shoulder. 

Teru grimaced at his open skin and sucked air in through his teeth as she rubbed the cotton swab into his shoulder. It felt cold and miserable, clashing with Nomura’s hands, which were so hot that Teru felt like he was being burned.

“So what is it then?!” He asked, the fear showing in his voice despite how much he was trying to stop himself from shaking. He didn’t want a regular shot and he did not want one from this place! He jerked back into Nomura as she brought up the shot again, this time their feet colliding. The man stumbled back before his grip on Teru turned painful.

Teru strangled a cry as he was pulled back flush against Nomura, forced to stay in line as she came closer. Her icy gloved hand wrapped around his arm to hold it still, her fingers digging in more than they had to. “Relax if you want it to hurt less,” she ordered, staring up dully at Teru.

He whipped his head around before staring up at Nomura. The man wasn’t even looking at him. He didn’t give one shit.

“It’s extremely hard to relax,” he hissed to the woman.

“Alright then.” She brought the needle up to Teru’s arm and before he could even yank himself away, Nomura pressed his arms against his side and forced him to stick in place. 

Teru’s eyes blew wide and turned his face away from the woman as a sharp, firey pain spread through his shoulder, pulling a hoarse cry from his throat. His mind flung into a panic, realizing that he had just been infected with a mystery liquid that who knows what it could do! And Nomura’s grip was not helping the pain level!!

The woman pulled away, running her gloved finger along the tip of the needle before turning and heading back to the swinging doors. “Nomura,” she called back while Teru was thrashing in his arms, trying to get away from his awful grip. “I suggest coming back to the lab with me.”

“ Why?” Teru begged, looking back up at Nomura desperately. He didn’t– he needed to know what was going to happen!

His heartbeat was accelerating quickly while terrible chills were running across his skin. His aura was thrumming within his neck, kicking and biting at his bones and underneath his skin, like a second heart that was attempting to claw its way out. Adrenaline was pulsing through his veins, along with whatever mystery shit they had injected into him.

Nomura’s eyes were strained as he stared down at him, his grip on his arms switching from painful to just strong and like an awful attempt at being reassuring. “You’ll be fine,” he said quietly, pushing Teru away from him and forcing him to stumble forward. He turned away and strode towards the room where the woman had disappeared too. 

Teru watched him leave, grimacing before whipping his head around the room, stretching his hands at his side as his palms tingled. The edges of his vision were blurring and his head buzzed, the feeling of his skin rippling growing worse. 

An involuntary groan bubbled up his throat and he turned back to the swinging doors and barreled towards them. He threw his shoulder into the middle, yelping as he was met with solid wood. He banged his fists against them, shaking the doors as best as he could in hopes of busting through whatever lock they had put on it. 

“ Let me out!” He screamed, pounding his hand against the surface with a loud slap. He pressed his forehead against the cold wood, panting loudly despite not needing to be out of breath. 

As if in response, Teru’s aura in his chest surged, snapping out of its strangled retainer. Horrible, electrifying waves rushed through his body, forcing his muscles to tense and for him to fall back from the door, clawing at his collar. Except it wasn’t a shock from the metal, it was his abilities.

Bolts of energy and lighting ransacked him before exiting through his hands and pouring off of his skin like liquid. It seeped onto the floor, the yellow liquid full of sickly greens and grays that stung him as he kept his feet on the ground. He roared as it stuck to his skin, unable to shake it off. He swung both of his hands blindly, falling back as he flailed. The yellow sludge followed his movement and split off into spiking balls that bounded around the room.

Teru ducked and dropped to the ground as they soared over him, except he lost all will to get up as soon as he bent his knees. He curled onto the floor, clutching at his chest as tears stung his eyes. He was sucking air in uselessly and sporadically while fear paralyzed him.

There wasn't anything for him to be scared about! But he was feeling all of the panic from the past however long he’s been here at once and multiplied to a hundred and it was painful and sickening and terrifying and he’s– he’s not sure!!

Someone grabbed onto the collar of Teru’s shirt and before he could turn around, the feeling of ice water splashed over him. He gasped and the next thing he knew he was falling towards the floor. He instinctively caught himself with his powers, ignoring the zapping, and cushioned his fall.

He sat up on his knees despite the trembling in his bones and turned around to get a look at a man standing across from him. Teru’s eyesight was wavering and the man seemed to be shifting unnaturally, mixed in with the darkening haze around Teru’s sight. If he focused on him, he could make out a pleasant smile on his face, his eyes closed. His dark hair was spiked and his hands were tucked into the pockets of his leather jacket.

“W— who—”

The man flickered out of Teru’s sight before he was right in front of him, his foot digging into Teru’s gut. 

Teru cried out as he was flung backward. He threw up a barrier behind his skull and at the moment of impact with the wall, he felt his aura explode everywhere around him, scraping his insides before shooting out from him. He crumpled to the floor, his head miraculously uninjured but with his aura lashing out from around him and flying into the air in tendrils. 

He forced his arms to prop himself up, tears unwillingly running down his face as he gasped for air. Chills came in waves over his skin and he tried to push past the feeling and he tried to focus on the man who was standing across the room from him. His vision wasn’t cooperating and the world seemed to spin around him.

“Why’re you so scared?” The man asked, tilting his head at him. “Your aura’s goin’ crazy.”

Teru gulped loudly, panting as he got to his feet. He swayed before pulling his hands up and glaring at the warping figure of the man. His mind spun and his knees threatened to give out. His eyes felt like they were bulging out of his skull. “Wha–” He sucked air in through his teeth as he shook his arms, trying to get his clinging aura to stop leaking out from the pores in his skin. “What did y– you do to me?”

This panic wasn’t natural. He felt terrified. He wanted to curl into himself and claw at his skin, raking his fingernails through his muscles to try and find the root of the sick. It wasn’t just on the surface, it was rattling out from his skeleton and infecting his nervous system, pushing through his thick muscles and overtaking his blood.

The man blinked out of existence and Teru whirled around, tripping over his heavy legs and falling over. The man popped in front of him, smiling down at him despite his eyes being closed. “We’re measuring your powers to the fullest extent.”

Teru sucked air in uselessly, staring up at him and trying to not let the fear show on his face with a grimace. He swung his hand up and his aura flung through the air, splattering on the wall rather than meeting its mark on his attacker. His eyes widened as the man’s leg slammed into the side of Teru’s head, sending him rolling across the floor.

Teru’s aura lashed out from around him while inside it ping-ponged in his ribcage. It twisted in his stomach and licked at his lungs, biting at his bones and filling them with electric fire. He stopped his rolling and got on his hands and knees, coughing as his head pounded while weak cries fell out of his mouth.

The man— he must be able to teleport or– or something because he shouldn’t be able to move that fast! How’s Teru supposed to fight back?! Especially— especially when he feels like he’s going to explode!

Teru’s blurred vision caught onto the yellow spilling all over the room and he tried to remember how he had pulled it back in before with Serizawa. He had sucked all of his aura back into himself and channeled it, right? Could— could his body take that right now?! He doesn’t think his body could take much more even though it feels like he should’ve already expelled most of his aura!

The man’s shoes appeared in front of him and Teru’s rapid-fire heart skipped a beat as his aura swelled. The tip of his black dress shoe tapped Teru’s chin before slamming up on his jaw with so much force that Teru’s whole body flung into the air. He cried out as his back slammed into the ceiling, blood flinging out of his mouth from his bitten tongue.

As he fell back down, the man appeared mid-air and brought his heel down on the middle of Teru’s back, flinging him to the ground.

Teru’s sludging aura cushioned his fall, the colors swirling and splattering out from under his weight. Teru turned his head up, yelling blindly as he flung his hands out, no longer carrying about the electric feeling his aura gave him. He had— he had to do something!

 He grabbed control of his aura and yanked it back to him, the colorful yellow that was splashing around the room surging towards him like a wave. It crawled up him and encased him in a solid, thick covering that threatened to make him topple over. He growled as he forced it to seep back underneath his skin and join the overflowing powers inside of him, making him feel like he’d burst.

The man said something, but the ringing in Teru’s ears was so loud that all it sounded like was buzzing. His hair was floating around his face and poking into his eyes, digging into the collar and the new metal piece on his neck. His huffing shook his chest as he struggled to withhold his power.

Teru forced his vision to come back into focus just as the man blinked away. A large hand grabbed the back of Teru’s head and swung him back before his legs were kicked out from underneath him.

As his back collided with the ground once again, the aura in him hit its limit and exploded from him. He screamed as it scraped his insides and it tore itself free, his back arching on the ground while his fingers dug at his collar like it could do something. The only coherent thought in his mind was that he wanted it to STOP.

A loud beep cut through the air over Teru’s screaming agony and his aura snapped into rigid shapes before tumbling back towards him and burrowing their way back into his chest and arms, bounding towards his throat. His aura wrapped tightly around itself in his neck, this time bulging further out and traveling to his collarbones.

The tension dropped out of him and he lay limply on the ground, his bloodshot eyes staring at the ceiling as he breathed unevenly. He glanced around him, unable to move the rest of his body to see if the man was still there, but it seemed like he was nowhere in sight.

His aura twisted in his neck, but it was trapped. He— he never thought that he’d be thankful for that.

Teru’s wide eyes flickered around his line of sight, the rest of his body heavy and numb. His breathing was loud and labored while his heart hammered into his ribcage and threatened to leap out of his chest. He could still taste blood in his mouth as his tongue ached. His mind was churning in routes that made no sense and made his body sick and heart squeeze, incoherent thoughts that made chills rack through him and remove any comfort that he had ever felt before in his life. The feeling of bees stinging his fingers and toes was uncomfortable, but it was like he was paralyzed and unable to shake it out. He tried to shut his eyes but wheezed painfully and shot them back open. The cold air against his tear ducts and waterline was more comforting than the darkness that shifted into shapes of things he couldn’t explain.

He heard the swinging doors open and footsteps trod out into the room. His still blurry eyes flickered over to the sound of a person coming closer. The doctor from earlier knelt next to him while the man in the pigeon sweater stood behind her. 

She slipped her hands under Teru’s back and lifted him, his head falling back and his skin bunching over the collar. She sat him up before moving his head so that his chin was tucked in against his neck. Cold fingers once again brushed the hair from his nape and Teru watched the pigeon man disappear behind him and felt him extract the metal patch off his neck.

“You’re pretty powerful,” the pigeon man told him, patting his shoulder before reappearing behind the woman’s side. Teru’s eyes locked onto him, the rest of his face slack. “That’s a lot of output you’ve got there. You should join Suzuki. You don’t want to be against him when you’re that kind of strong.” 

Teru blinked at him, swallowing the blood and spit in his mouth before the woman laid him back on the ground. 

“Nomura will collect you in a few moments,” she said, pulling out another shot from her coat. Teru made a pathetic noise as she brought it up to his arm, wishing that he could move his body. She pulled down the collar of his shirt and administered the shot. It was just as painful as the first and a whimper bubbled out of his throat as she pulled the needle away.

The two left the room and Teru went back to staring at the ceiling, his mind racing and twisting small ideas into horror stories.

He wasn’t sure how long it was, but his heart began to slow, giving his body a break. The waves of anxiety that had been crashing over him rolled off and slowed to a stop, only happening after long intervals. The paralyzing feeling on his body faded and he bent his fingers repeatedly until he was able to move his whole hand.

It took so long before he felt human again. But once his heart was only pounding against his ribs with slow beats, he finally closed his eyes and inhaled deeply.

The shape of his aura in his neck was shrinking significantly, reverting to the core that pressed against his throat. He didn’t think that he’d ever miss that feeling, but it was better than the larger shape from moments ago. It was better than his aura being free if it felt like that.

…no, no he shouldn’t say that. His psychic abilities make him him . He shouldn’t be thankful that they’re locked up again. It’s— they’ve never felt like that before. They’re doing— they did something with his head. That’s not normal.  

He sighed again before swallowing, his throat burning from his screams. He wished he could have a cup of tea. Or go lay down in his warm, safe, familiar bed at home and wrap himself in his blanket. Maybe turn on a movie in the background and let the sound of people living lull him off to a relaxing sleep where he could pretend that none of this was happening.

But then there was someone picking him up, and Teru didn’t have the energy to open his eyes back up.

He let himself be carried off to what he assumed would be his room, his body aching from that man’s blows and his own abilities.

-

Teru woke up lying on a rock-hard mattress with his blanket tucked firmly beneath him. The first thing he did was groan loudly, instantly hit with the repercussions of that fight.

He rolled onto his back and glared up at the ceiling. He rubbed at his bruised chin and neck, wincing at the touch. 

…what the hell was that?! What kind of drug did they give him to make him have that shitty experience? He had no control over his powers at all and could barely think straight!

Who was that guy in the dumbass leather jacket? And the pigeon dude? Why are these Claw people so weird?

All of his muscles ached and his mind still buzzed. His stomach growled loudly and he scrunched his face in a pained expression. He forgot that it had been over twenty-four hours since he had last eaten.

He felt brief relief over the fact that he was thinking normally again. But that shot… they probably had more than just that dose. Which meant that they could give it to him again.

The thought made his gut twist.

Teru sat up slowly in bed, no longer tired. He still seemed to have a bit of residual energy rumbling around in his chest, making his aura seem extra tight in his neck.

He glanced around his room as his fingers traced the outline of his collar, making sure that the added piece was still gone on the back of his neck. He saw that there were no food trays in the room, which he hoped was just because it had been cleaned up. Not that Kageyama hadn’t had to wait to eat for him, since he apparently already had to miss a day of food.

…damn. This…this place just kept getting worse and worse.

Teru pressed his wrists into his eyes and sighed. Kageyama shuffled under his usual hidden spot in his blankets, and when Teru dropped his hands, he saw Kageyama staring at him.

The two watched each other for a few moments, Kageyama’s hollow eyes taking in him. He noticed how they got stuck on his neck, and he wondered if there was something wrong with his collar.

“Hey,” Teru said softly, his eyes drifting to the floor so he wouldn’t have to look at his unsettling eyes anymore. He rubbed self-consciously at the skin above the collar. “How many meals passed while I was gone and/or sleeping?”

There was a long pause and Teru was just about to give up on waiting when Kageyama shifted again. “I think… one after you left, and…um…” Teru looked up as he was talking and watched Kageyama’s tense posture, hoping to read his lips to help him figure out what he was saying. He spoke so quietly. “One while you were asleep.”

Teru nodded, resting his hands on his knees. He was actually pretty surprised that Kageyama was talking to him. But he guessed they’d been roommates for…longer than he thinks.

“My name’s Teruki Hanazawa, by the way,” Teru said, making eye contact again. He watched Kageyama pull his face out from behind his blanket a little bit more. “I know your name now, so it’s only fair if you know mine.”

“Okay.”

Teru watched him, waiting for more of a response. It didn’t seem like he was good at keeping up conversation though. So. Whatever.

Teru got off the bed and stretched out his back, grimacing as the spots where the man had kicked ached. “I’m going to take a shower, I think,” he told Kageyama, who was still watching him intently.

“...Okay.”

“I’m just trying to not be awkward,” Teru sighed as he explained his chat, looking over at Kageyama. He really didn’t have the energy to dance around the other person in his room anymore. “If we’re stuck here, we might as well be on speaking terms.”

Kageyama seemed to think over that before sinking back into his bed fully. “Okay.”

Teru ignored the spike of annoyance in him and made his way towards the bathroom. It wasn’t like he was actually dirty. Getting kicked around in a clean room doesn’t do much more than make you sweat, but he just…needed something to do. He was at least thankful that his aura goop was back in his throat rather than staining his skin. 

He raised his eyebrows at the changes of clothes on the rack below the metal sink. They must’ve finally decided it was time to do laundry. Probably the only plus side of the day.

After a miserable and probably not-that-long shower, Teru changed into the fresh boxers and sweatsuit that they had given him. He dried off his hair with the old sweater before looking at himself in the mirror. He leaned in close and tilted his chin up, staring at the bruises and scratches on his neck, remembering how he had been clawing at it. No wonder Kageyama was staring. 

He was still dropping weight and it was becoming incredibly clear that he was not eating enough. His cheekbones were gaunt and his eyes sunken, the dark circles underneath painfully visible. And his roots were actually starting to show. Like a little over a millimeter. He would rather be fully brunette again than have both blond and brown. 

Well, he’d rather be blond. But they didn’t seem to have box bleaching kits here.

He sighed before messing with his wet hair, trying to get it to the point where it would dry correctly. As he preened himself, he stared at his face and realized that he looked about as miserable as he used to when his parents first left. Back when he’d come home from school and take off his makeup and have to look at tired eyes and injuries from Claw.

Except he didn’t have any reason to hide his misery here. There was no one to impress or to try and make like him. Not when everyone around him was evil.

Even stupid Nomura.

Teru didn’t care if it was his job, he– Teru knew he couldn’t trust anyone here but— but Nomura seemed like he could’ve been different! But no, he held Teru down so that he could be drugged and forced to go fucking insane! And to think, he had the balls to look disappointed when Teru said that he could kill him! It was just the truth!!

Fucking… whatever. He’d let him have it the next time he sees him. Maybe he’d even attack him, make him have to zap Teru just to get him to stop clawing at his face.

Woah.

That’s…intense.

Did…did he always think like that?

The more obviously fake blond tucked his arms around himself before turning to leave the bathroom. He pushed open the door and looked around their small white room and felt something small inside his heart tear.

He doesn’t want to be here anymore. He wants to go home.

Kageyama stuck his head out from behind his blanket and watched as Teru lay down on his bed, studying the ceiling blankly.

Neither of them moved until their food was served. 

Teru stared at it, his heart still bleeding into his chest. He…he needs to do something to stop it.

He pulled himself out of bed and walked over to the pathetic-looking tray. He plopped down on the middle of the floor and pulled his tray towards him, turning to face Kageyama. “Want to eat together?” He asked, ignoring the way his throat still itched.

Kageyama’s eyes widened slightly and he looked at his own food.

“You don’t have to,” Teru told him quietly, mentally preparing himself to have to eat the shit. “Just. Figured we could talk or. I don’t know,” he mumbled, picking up a piece of the soggy broccoli with his fingers. 

Why was he even trying this? It didn’t matter.

At this rate, Teru wasn’t sure if he’d ever be able to get out of here, even with this guy's help. Not when they have drugs and… and damn Suzuki and Serizawa and whoever that dumbass teleporter is. 

And he doesn’t need any sort of friends here either. He was fine without friends before, and who knows who is actually trustworthy in this hell hole. This kid could betray his trust just as quickly as everyone else has! For all Teru knows, he could be on Claw’s side and just here to– to trick him!

But then Teru watched as Kageyama carefully extracted himself from his blanket, revealing his small, trembling frame. His hair dragged along the mattress as he slowly slipped to the floor, his legs folding beneath him and hiding his bony feet. He rubbed his scrawny fingers, staring at the tile before slowly pulling himself across the floor and grabbing onto his tray.

Teru’s eyebrows rose as he watched Kageyama pull the tray back towards his side of the bed, far enough away that he could lean on the frame. Of course, due to the room's size, they weren’t too far apart.

He tucked his long hair behind his ears so that he could eat without it getting in the way, and Teru wondered how he could ever think that this kid was on Claw’s side. He looked so… hollow. Pitiful .

But Teru figured it’d be weird if he stared at him for too long, so he decided to choke down the broccoli. “This food is awful,” he stated, even though they both knew that. But he was kind of pleased to see that Kageyama nodded slightly.

And then it was back to silence as they both watched their food.

It felt heavier now that Teru had started speaking. His throat and chest were itching, like he had to keep talking. He— the silence was buzzing in his ears and he could feel that anxiety brewing in his head and…

Teru ate another piece of broccoli. It didn’t matter if Kageyama was listening or not. He just…he just needed to talk. “Back home,” he started before swallowing against the itch in his throat. “I uh… I used to just buy my vegetables frozen from the grocery store. It was easier than having to boil them myself.” Kageyama didn’t acknowledge his words, but Teru didn’t…stop. He picked up some rice and put it on top of a piece of chicken, frowning. “Then I realized that I could roast or saute vegetables. I was pretty sure I’d never eat soggy broccoli again.”

Kageyama picked at his own chicken, not giving any sort of a response. But he wasn’t running away. And that was enough right now.

“I know their intent is to make this food awful,” Teru sighed after having eaten a little bit more. “But just a little bit of salt could make this whole thing better. Or…or cooking the rice a little bit more. It’s kind of chewy.”

Teru’s shoulders were growing heavier and he stopped blinking out of fear that the water in his eyes would break. He was so tired. “But… but at least they’re feeding us.”

They ate in silence for a while, Teru trying to force the tears in his eyes to go away without him having to bring attention to it. Maybe talking wasn’t the answer. He’s…he’s so tired.

“They– um…” 

Teru glanced up and saw Kageyama’s eyes boring holes into his food, his posture extra rigid. “They used to give me straw–strawberries.” He said the word with little confidence and glanced up at Teru like he was looking for approval. So he nodded, hoping that he was encouraging him. Kageyama’s eyes widened and he looked back at his food, continuing. “But um… they were kind of moldy and I got sick from it. Really badly. So I don’t get th-them anymore.”

Teru tried not to imagine what getting food sickness here would be like. He tried not to wonder how long Kageyama had been here. “I guess it's nice of them to not give it anymore then, huh?”

“I guess,” Kageyama agreed, eating more of the rice. 

It was quiet for a few more beats.

“H– Hana…” Kageyama started slowly, his brows furrowing slightly as he tried to finish the word.

The corners of Teru’s lips upturned ever so slightly. “Hanazawa,” he reminded him, hopefully gently.

“Hanaza…wa. Hanazawa.” Kageyama nodded to himself. He trembled slightly before he met Teru’s gaze again. “I– I might not remember it.”

Teru shrugged, waving a hand. “It’s ok. I don’t really mind.”

Kageyama watched him, tilting his head in confusion. “You…you don’t?”

Teru’s heart bled a little, but he smiled a tiny bit more. He was surprised to find that he wasn’t faking it. “Mhm.”

The dark-haired boy looked shocked. He stilled back into silence, going back to working on his food while Teru finished up his own. He couldn’t think of much reason to make the gross taste last longer.

Just as Teru was about to sigh and get up to wash his hands, Kageyama spoke again.

“I’m… I’m sorry that you’re here,” he whispered, trembling slightly. 

Teru looked away from him and at the rest of the room, pulling his legs up to his chest and leaning against them. “Yeah… me too.” He sniffed as quietly as he could, but in the near silence of the room, it was still pretty loud. “I’m sorry that you’re here too, Kageyama,” he added after a few moments.

Kageyama made a noise of acknowledgment before going back to his food.

Teru watched him eat, deciding that he wasn’t going to run off to the bathroom, just in case they could make any more conversation happen.

But Kageyama finished in silence, and Teru was tired. And. And kind of mad. Scared.

So instead of thinking about it, he got into bed after washing his hands, tucked himself in, and imagined a warm blanket around his shoulders and a fluffy pillow underneath his head.