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Breathe., she told herself.
Stay calm, this isn't your first crush, let alone your first relationship.
And yet, Amelia had been pacing around the hotel room for the better part of the last fifteen minutes, randomly stopping to check her outfit and hair in the mirror before continuing her rounds once more.
To the bed, to the window, to the wall, to the mirror, to the bed, to the wall. Again and again and again.
In another life, she'd have poured herself a drink to calm her nerves right about now. But in another life, she'd also never be this giddy and ecstatic in the first place, her stomach filled with butterflies at the thought of who was going to knock at the hotel room door at any moment.
It had been two months since she had last seen Kai and god, it had been two months too long. Hitting relationship milestones wasn't exactly difficult when you only saw each other once in a blue moon, quite literally.
Had it already been half a year since their first kiss?
Amelia had reached the mirror once more, giving herself another look up and down. She was wearing a simple but elegant wrap dress, the dark red fabric reaching just below her knees. Truth be told, she had only put it on because it could be torn off in one simple motion. She bit her lip at the thought of what was about to come, tucking a strand of her otherwise loose hair behind her ear.
No possibly distressing hair ties or pins were going to dig into her scalp today.
A knock tore Amelia from her thoughts, and her heart was ready to jump out of her chest as she rushed to the door.
She didn't even give Kai a chance to say hello, wrapping her arms tightly around their waist and burrowing her face in their chest, not caring that they hadn’t even been able to put their bag down. She took a deep breath in, taking in their scent. Warm, a hint of cedar mixed with some sweetness. Most importantly, they smelled of home.
God, how she had missed them.
"I missed you, too," Kai murmured, pressing a kiss to her scalp. For a moment, there was silence. Then, a cheeky question: "Are you going to invite me in?"
Amelia wasn't going to be asked twice. "Yes, sorry," she replied, making room for Kai to enter the room, but never letting go of their hand.
Her stomach was fluttering with anticipation, but mostly, she felt relief.
"You're actually here," she said, almost in disbelief.
"Yeah, I am." Kai smiled at her, putting their bag on the floor and pushing the door shut with their foot. Their fingers still intertwined, Kai used it to their advantage and pulled Amelia close, letting their other hand drop to her lower back.
"And how have you been, Dr. Sheperd?" they whispered, their lips ghosting over Amelia's neck but never quite making contact.
Their outfit was simple: boots, a black t-shirt paired with black suit pants, and a simple dark brown jacket to keep warm. They looked absolutely stunning and Amelia couldn’t wait to get all those layers off of them.
Amelia shivered, hardly able to suppress a moan.
"Oh, Dr. Bartley, I can't say I've been too well..." her voice trailed off when she felt Kai let go of her hand and use its newfound freedom to trace her hip, up and down, down and up.
It was torture, and with each motion, she could feel the arousal grow between her legs.
"And why is that, Amelia?" She could hear it in their voice, could hear how much they were holding back.
Deciding to move things along, Amelia took a few steps back until her legs hit the bed. She let herself fall on her back, her arms stretched out above her head.
Total vulnerability, but first and foremost: an invitation.
She was lucky: It seemed that Kai had decided against playing coy, slowly approaching the bed like a predator. With a shrug, their jacket fell to the floor, followed by their boots that got kicked somewhere on the carpet.
Spread out like prey, Amelia had never felt safer. She wanted to be seen, to be touched, to be bare and taken.
"I've just been missing a certain someone's touch."
The mattress shifted as Kai climbed on top of the bed and her, moving up until they were seated on top of Amelia. Her breath hitched.
"Kai, please..." she begged softly, reaching her hand up where her lover caught it.
Kai stared at her, their eyes burning as they took Amelia's hand between their own and gently started kissing it. One finger at a time, each knuckle getting the attention it deserved. When Kai moved on to the palm of her hand, Amelia let out a small moan.
"Must be a special someone if they've got you worked up like that," Kai teased, their lips ghosting over the back of Amelia's hand.
They were barely touching her, and yet it was already almost too much for her.
She was wet, her center on fire with want. She couldn't wait any longer, couldn't suppress the desire that was running through every fibre of her being. She needed Kai, now. Propping herself up with her elbow, she wrapped her other arm around Kai and pulled them close, her heart nearly jumping out of her chest when their lips finally met.
For a moment, they just laid there, Kai on top of her, lips touching and carefully exploring each other. Familiar and yet still so new, never enough. But then, Kai pressed one of their thighs between Amelia's legs and she allowed her want to fully take over her.
Before she knew it, Kai's t-shirt had flown off, landing somewhere on the floor. In the meantime, Kai had found the ribbon of Amelia's dress, gently pulling it open with a single tug. It fell open, exposing her breasts and the simple black slip she was wearing.
"Did you wear this on purpose?" Kai mumbled between kisses, and Amelia could hear the raised eyebrow in their question.
"Of course, who do you take me for?" she replied, trying to make work of Kai's belt without much success. She laughed. Every damn time. "Let me give you a hand," Kai said, somehow able to open the belt and wriggle out of their pants without interrupting yet another kiss even once.
"God, Amelia, you're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen." Their lips worked their way from Amelia's mouth to her neck, down to her collarbone and breasts, slowly getting lower and lower with each kiss. The closer Kai got to Amelia's hips, the more she arched her back. Her panties were soaked, she could feel it.
"May I touch you?" Kai asked, and the question alone drew a moan from Amelia's lips. "Please, Kai. Touch me, fuck me. I need you."
Long fingers tugged at her panties and she lifted her hips so that they could be pulled off. Her legs fell open, her core exposed. Kai's gaze darted downwards, their eyes darkened by want.
They leaned back down to catch Amelia in another feverish kiss, and just when she almost couldn't take it anymore, Kai slid their hand between Amelia's legs, their fingers circling her clit.
Waves of pleasure rushed through Amelia's body and she gripped the sheets, trying to hold on to something as Kai was slowly taking her apart.
They didn't alter their tempo, but the pressure changed every once in a while — just when Amelia got close, they'd move their hand so they were barely touching her until she had had enough time to cool down.
Amelia grabbed Kai's neck, her fingers entangled in their hair as her hips bucked upwards.
"I want you inside me," she begged, and with her other hand, she took Kai's wrist and guided them where she wanted them most.
The skin between her legs was damp from lust, and she spread her legs even further.
Kai was more than happy to oblige. Amelia knew how much it turned them on when she told them what she wanted, and she could hardly wait to return the favour.
But then, two fingers entered her and her mind went blank.
"You're so beautiful, Amelia," Kai whispered as they curled up their fingers, pressing a kiss to Amelia's hipbone. The slow rhythm was perfect and yet it was pure torture because no matter how much Amelia shifted on the bed, lifting her body to meet Kai with each movement, it wasn't enough to allow her to cum.
Yet.
Kai knew what they were doing, and Amelia adored them for it. Her lips were slightly parted as Kai elicited moan after moan out of her, and just when she was about to beg for more, Kai pulled away their hand.
"Kai."
But she didn't receive an answer, Kai busy continuing their earlier trail of kisses down Amelia's body. From her belly button down over to her hips, across her inner thigh where they bit down slightly. A mark only visible to Amelia and them, marking her as theirs.
For a moment, they stayed like that, enjoying the intimacy of the moment until Kai was satisfied with the blotty result on Amelia’s pale skin. Then, their mouth found a different destination.
Just like before, they started with just kisses, their lips brushing over her center. Amelia held her breath, waiting, praying for more, more touch, more Kai. It felt like hours, even though it was only a few seconds later that Kai pressed their tongue against her nub.
That feeling alone was nearly enough to send her over the edge, give her the relief she longed for, but then Kai started moving their tongue up and down and the sensation became almost too much to bear.
Amelia's hands found their way into Kai's hair as she guided them where she wanted their tongue most. Well, she wanted it everywhere, but this was about as close to perfection as she was ever going to get.
She allowed her entire body to relax into the sensation of Kai licking, stroking and sucking, working her open more and more. The arousal running through her every fibre was almost painful, her entire body overcome with lust.
Just when she thought she couldn't take it anymore, Kai gave her the final push she needed by penetrating her with their fingers once more. Two, three flicks of the wrist were all it took for Amelia to come undone, and a gospel of curses and moans fell from her lips as the orgasm washed over her, making her clench her legs together.
She needed a few moments to come back to herself, and that's when she noticed that she had accidentally trapped Kai's head between her thighs, face nestled into her core. Quickly, she opened them and propped herself up on her elbows to check on them.
"I'm sorry, I wasn't tryi—"
"Amelia, please don't apologize," Kai interrupted her, the smuggest smile on their face. They wiped their mouth on the back of their hand, Amelia's wetness spread all over their skin. When they leaned in for a kiss, Amelia could taste herself on their lips. "God, you're so hot," she whispered.
"You're one to talk," Kai replied, lying down next to her on the bed. Instinctively, they reached for each other's hands and Amelia cuddled up close. "And don't ever worry about me down there," they continued, "if this is how I go, it was a happy death."
Amelia giggled.
"I can see it written on my gravestone." Kai gestured with their hand, "in bold letters: They died doing what they loved."
"You're ridiculous. And perfect." And I love you.
The words were on the tip of her tongue, but she didn't feel brave enough to say them yet. But there was no rush. They had time, and Amelia had always been a fan of show, don't tell.
Her fingers wandered down to the hem of Kai’s underpants.
"My turn."