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ALKALOID had just finished another training session, exhausted as they usually are. The beloved juniors had plans to hang out right afterwards, so they hurried along after the end of their training. That left just the seniors: alone.
"Your teaching is always very helpful, Mayoi-san," Tatsumi broke the silence. "I feel I have improved a bit more this session."
"Yes! I think you have as well..." Mayoi avoided his compliment, as she usually does.
"Thank you, love." Tatsumi smiled at her very gently; she could never get over such a dazzling smile. Mayoi fell more in love with him every day, it seemed.
"I believe we should be going now, then..."
"Yes. Let's walk together?"
"Mhm..."
Logically, Mayoi can never deny to walking back to the dormitory with Tatsumi. Considering the two actually lived right next to each other, there was no reason to refuse other than Mayoi's classic reason: being avoidant. If it was anyone else, she may have just hid in the vents for a while and wait until she was guaranteed to be on her own. However, this was her darling boyfriend, so she could never get herself to say no to that adorable face of his.
Finally, they had arrived to Mayoi's door. Mayoi released her hand from Tatsumi's to unlock it (they had been holding hands the whole time). As she was about to enter, he called out to her.
"Mayoi-san. Before you go..."
"Hm?"
By time she had turned around, Tatsumi gently held her around the waist and leaned forward to kiss her on the lips. Startled, Mayoi deepened it just a little, placing her hands onto his forearms. A gentle bite on her lip caused her to squeak and flinch away, amusing her partner greatly.
In a panic, Mayoi darted into her dorm, swiftly closing the door behind her. Tatsumi is going to give her a heart attack one day! Her poor heart can't handle all his charming words and affections.
With nothing to do now, she might as well change into more comfortable clothes. If she's not going out for the rest of the day, she might already dress into her nightwear. After removing her jacket, she felt something softly poked into her side, around where the pocket was. Confused, she looked at the pocket to identify the strange prodding. It was an envelope. A letter? Why is it in her pocket? She never had a letter in there... More importantly, who addressed this to her? The anxiety inside of her refused to get dressed until she read this mysterious note.
She sat down on her crimson bed decorated with a gold regal embroidered pattern across it. The letter was sealed with a red wax, the colour matching quite similarly with her bed. Her anxiety unwavering, she clinged onto her black pillow and tried to lean back onto the head of her bed. With anticipation, she finally unsealed the envelope. Thoughts are spinning around in her head, wondering what this could possibly be. She really had no need to panic this intensely about a letter, but this is Mayoi we're talking about. She finally read the note.
__________
Dear Mayoi-san,
I apologise if this seems out of nowhere: It had occurred to me the other day that I could find ways to express my feelings towards you apart from meeting face to face. I believe writing a letter will soothe your heart a bit more.
I'm not sure where to even begin; there's too much that I love about you. You have me wrapped around your finger; how cruel of you! ♡
I suppose I can start with the most obvious thing about you: your beauty, that is. Mayoi-san, you completely bewitch me with your appearance: your eyes are just as stunning to look at as the sea, your teeth are sharp yet hold a wonderful uniqueness to them, the mole to the side of your mouth is one of my favourite places to kiss you, and your hair... You leave me quite speechless. Are words enough to even convey how much I adore it? The colour is stunning. The braid you have to your right accompanied by a beautiful silk ribbon highlights the divinity of your appearance. I've only seen your hair down under few circumstances, but I simply must compare you to a goddess walking among mortals. Is it possible to be addicted to another being? If so, I believe I have quite the addiction to you.
I believe I'll overflow you with my affection if I write any more. I shall leave it for another letter.
-Tatsumi ♡♡♡
__________
Mayoi Ayase has been killed on account of her boyfriend being an absolute sweetheart. She reread the words over and over, in utter disbelief. He was actively trying to kill her, surely. How could he be able to write this much about Mayoi of all people? He has more to say?? Mayoi can't imagine herself being alive when he finally writes the next one.
After another day of practice, ALKALOID collectively agreed to eat lunch together. They hung out all the time since they were a unit, but times like these allowed them to have proper conversations together and enjoy each other's company. The conversations were never really too special: their current work schedule, what they've been doing individually, Aira letting his minor frustrations out onto Hiiro after he doesn't fully understand something. They all prayed before their meal (a habit they picked up from Tatsumi) and began to eat.
Mayoi is a bit of an observer, so she can't help but look at the adorable faces of her unit mates. Hiiro always has a sparkle in his eyes whenever eating his favourite (omurice, that is). The innocent sparkle has Mayoi squealing internally. On the other hand, Aira is eating in a completely normal manner. However, the sauce from Aira's meal has found itself stuck nearby his mouth that he is completely unaware of. The ignorance makes Mayoi's heart race.
"Aira-san~ Fufu, you have some sauce on your face." Mayoi informed in a voice that wavered between sweet yet creepy.
"Huh?! Um, where..."
"Let me get it for you~" Mayoi grabbed a napkin and dabbed it onto the spot covered in sauce. Aira had no idea what to do but accept Mayoi wiping it off for him.
"Geez, I feel so spoiled sometimes..." Aira points out. "I feel like I'm out with my mother."
"M-Mother?!" Mayoi jolts back into her seat in shock.
"I've never really known what it's like to have a mother, but Aira commonly compares you to one, doesn't he?" Hiiro adds.
A small "eek" can be heard as Mayoi twists her head to look away from her adorable yet evil juniors. This results in her facing Tatsumi as they were sat right next to each other. He smiles at her. Mayoi gives a pitiful glare that says "don't you dare say what you always do". Tatsumi is either blissfully unaware, or feels like joining in on the classic joke (that he started). Most definitely the latter.
"You would be an excellent mother, Mayoi-san." Tatsumi states in such confidence.
"No I wouldn't?! I-I, I just like taking care of my cute juniors! There's... nothing motherly about it!" Mayoi squeaked out her excuses.
"You're always so worried about us!" Aira objects. "Sometimes you text me and Hiro-kun and ask if we're okay when we're out like a mom checking up on her kids who went out without her!"
Mayoi buried her face in her hands.
"Umu. You also tend to be fully equipped with anything we might need if anything happens to us," Hiiro concurs. "Like medicine, food and drinks."
"Not to mention all the times you pat our heads and love spoiling us to bits!"
"Fufu. That's enough, 'children'." Tatsumi interrupts. "I don't think Mayoi-san can handle any more rebuttals."
"It's weird seeing how shameless you assign yourself as our 'dad', Tattsun-senpai." Aira admitted.
"Hmm..." Hiiro pondered. "If Mayoi-senpai is our 'mother' and Tatsumi-senpai is our 'father', wouldn't that imply they would have a romantic relationship with each other?"
"You don't need to go that far..." Aira dismissed the confused redhead's comment.
The two seniors haven't really told their juniors about their relationship. Mayoi wanted to keep it a secret (or at least just not tell them) for a little bit until she felt fully confident in how their relationship was going. It's not like she didn't love Tatsumi - she couldn't imagine herself with anyone else - but the hateful thoughts in her head would tell her she never deserved someone so wonderful. Besides, this conversation alone seemed to prove that their usual mannerisms and attitude with each other seems like the ordinary for their 'children'.
"Mayoi-san, may you return to us?" Tatsumi leaned closer to Mayoi, signalling her to calm down and join the group again. Although Mayoi wishes she could sulk more sometimes, Tatsumi pushes her out what would be her very stubborn shell.
Her hands fell into her lap, taking a deep breath. Tatsumi flipped one of her hands over and held it with one of his own. He gazed into her eyes, nothing but love on his face. A silent 'thank you'.
Mayoi smiled back more sheepishly, glancing back to see his adorable face. Adorable? It didn't feel right. Tatsumi was a different type of adorable. Regarding Mayoi's appeal towards cuteness, her go-to definitions would be Aira-san or Hiiro-san or Chieftain (especially Chieftain actually). Pairing Tatsumi with that didn't feel right. Mayoi's odd love for her 'adorable' juniors was strictly platonic admiration. Tatsumi was different to that. They exchange affectionate words and petnames for each other, cuddle each other, kiss each other. She couldn't find the right word for him... But it was different.
"Mayo-san!"
"Eep! I'msorryI'msorryI'msorry I didn't mean to space out!!" Mayoi apologised profusely.
"It's alright, Mayoi-san." Says the man who made her space out in the first place. "I suppose we are all done eating?"
"Yep!"
"Umu!"
"Mhm.."
"I believe my next job will be quite soon, so I will be going then." Tatsumi announces his leave.
"Alright, good luck Tattsun-senpai!" Aira waved.
"Ah, before I go..."
Tatsumi grabs something out of his bag. A letter. Mayoi freezes up right then and there. Surely he wouldn't give it to her right in front of the juniors...
"Here, Mayoi-san. Someone wanted to give this to you earlier but couldn't find you, so they happened to hand it to me." Tatsumi lied, yet his smile made him sound so convincing.
"Ah, um, thank you..." Mayoi's expression was still full of horror.
"Farewell, everyone."
"Goodbye, Tatsumi-senpai!"
Mayoi was still processing receiving the letter in public that she didn't even say farewell to him. She just stared into the blank white envelope.
"Mayo-san? Do you know what the letter's about?" Aira asked.
"Huh?! Um..."
"Or who gave you it?"
"I... I don't know. I'll read it later."
"Why not now? I wanna see what it says!" Aira begged.
"Aaaah, um!! It's probably not important!" Mayoi lied, technically. These series of letters are going to be the highlight of Mayoi's week. "It's probably just to do with work. Or maybe just a fan letter."
"Hmm..." Aira pouts slightly. "Okay."
Mayoi sighed in relief. Now all she had to do was return to her dorm and freak out about whatever Tatsumi possibly has to say about her this time.
Very conveniently, Tomoya is out of the dorm, which means Mayoi can be as embarrassing as she wants. That is, by laying on her bed whilst kicking her feet back and forth, opening up her next love letter.
That's what they are, huh? Love letters...
__________
Dear Mayoi-san,
Please do not think I am anywhere near finished. I could write an infinity of letters to talk about my love for you. I hope my previous words were not too 'cheesy'; I meant every word I said. Now, what to discuss this time...
I suppose who you are, how you act - your personality. To think you were too terrified to meet us that you hid inside the vents in our first meeting, and now you're here. I'm amazed at your progress, Mayoi-san. Of course, you are not completely different. I do not expect you to be rid of all your worries and strong self image. Those will move slowly over time, I believe. However, it is incredible to see you prioritise yourself, become a little bit selfish, act more honest and put more trust into me and our fellow members: you truly have turned into something marvellous. You trust me a lot, I assume. I wish to never abuse that trust you have of me. Seeing you hand that trust and allow me to see the weaker, flawed sides of yourself is something I could not feel more blessed to obtain. You are extraordinary, love. Your caring nature to your beloved juniors can be seen as obsessive and strange to few, but a real glance at you can show you are an affectionate senior with too much love in your heart. I know too well that your thoughts tempt you to 'protect' them, but I assure you they are properly protected in your care. I have told you this quite a lot, but my thoughts will never waver. You would be an excellent mother. You are already a loving senior to our children of ALKALOID; I feel like I'm part of an actual family with you. This may seem awfully soon to ask, but... I hope we could have a family some day. I would be at complete peace with the world if that wish came true. Would you like that? The thought of us picking names and buying clothes and placing a crib to put in the room we'd share makes my heart flutter with ease. All these daydreams seem rather silly, don't they? I wonder if you have any about me... Do you?
-Tatsumi ♡♡♡
__________
Thank God Mayoi was alone because she looked like a total dork. She kicked her legs more out of excitement. The letter was by the side of her as she squeezed one of her pillows tight. She regained her composure more swiftly than last time. This letter felt more bittersweet. Tatsumi praised the progress she had made as a person, along with sharing his obvious thoughts of wanting a family with her. Tatsumi assigning himself as ALKALOID's father whilst claiming Mayoi would be the mother felt like an outright love confession. Mayoi definitely would've saw it that way if it weren't for how quickly Tatsumi was adamant on his role as a father figure. It was cute to see the true side of Tatsumi. 'Cute'? Mayoi still can't find the right word for it...
Another uneventful day found Mayoi wondering around the freezing climate of ES. Winter had arrived, so it was natural the weather would be like this. Although it would be much warmer inside, Mayoi felt like she needed to clear her mind. Her thoughts were growing rather unpleasant, so she walked in the chilled outside, allowing the surrounding snow and frost to wake her up.
Was the garden doing alright? Mayoi wasn't fully invested in flowers, but she grew rather attached to some ever since Tatsumi would invite her to the gardens as he cared for the plants. She hasn't seen Tatsumi this morning. There's no way he could be there, right?
Mayoi still went along anyway, just in case. She was walking around aimlessly anyway, so it didn't matter if nobody was there.
Oh, he is there.
Tatsumi was indeed at the garden. Mayoi noticed however that he was not tending to them as he usually does, but was instead sitting on a nearby bench with a slightly pained expression. Seeing that face hurts Mayoi heart whenever she sees it, so she ran over to him as fast as she could, ignoring the frosty pavement beneath her. Luckily, she didn't slip.
"Tatsumi-saaan!" Mayoi called out as she grew closer. "Are you okay?"
"Ah, um, not really..." Tatsumi confessed.
"What's wrong?"
"It appears my leg has gone quite stiff from the weather. I thought I would be fine at first, but I don't think it's feeling any better." Tatsumi smiled sadly.
Before she knew it, Mayoi's instincts kicked in.
"Here, let me carry you back." She offered.
"...That's very kind of you, Mayoi-san. I'd appreciate it if it's not a bother."
"Not at all." Mayoi gently raised Tatsumi to stand up from the bench. His leg did seem to be very still. Mayoi pulled Tatsumi's legs from behind as he placed his arms around her shoulders. As much as she would like to rush him back, she needs to be as gentle as possible. The walk shouldn't be too long.
"Mayoi-san? What were you doing outside?"
How honest can she be?
"Just clearing my head."
"I see."
"What were you doing out?"
"I still felt obligated to care for the plants in the garden. If they're left untreated many of them may wither away."
"Surely you could ask someone from Gardenia to do it? You need to take care of yourself, Tatsumi-san."
"...I'm sorry. I suppose there's much I need to learn."
"..."
Mayoi took Tatsumi to his dorm and immediately placed him onto his bed.
"Give me a few minutes, I'll be right back."
Mayoi heads into... the bathroom? Ah, she was running a bath, wasn't she? Tatsumi felt flattered by the realisation. His heart skipped a beat or two when he thought there was a possibility that Mayoi would help bathe him. However, that wasn't guaranteed, so he felt no need to be so flustered at the thought.
A few minutes pass until the faint sound of running water came to a halt. Mayoi walked back in.
"Do you feel any better?"
"Yes. It's much better than being outside."
"Can you stand up?"
"Ah, I think..."
Regardless, Mayoi helps him anyway, holding his hand as she leads him to the bathroom.
Tatsumi removed his jacket before remembering that Mayoi was still in the room with him.
"Ah, Mayoi-san?"
"Eeek!" Mayoi's body twisted away, hands covering her face, even if she couldn't see him from where she was facing.
Tatsumi smirked. Despite dating, Mayoi seemed terrified at the thought of looking at Tatsumi's body. It wasn't out of repulsion, no, moreso a fear of breaking boundaries. Tatsumi didn't have an issue with her looking at him, but he appreciated her thoughtfulness.
Placing his still leg into the bath, he instantly felt healed. Eventually, his entire body made it into the bath; the warmth was relieving.
"Mayoi-san?"
Slowly, his girlfriend turned around to face him, her smile as timid as ever. She approached the bath and kneeled beside him.
"Would you, um..." She started.
"Hm?"
"Uh, would you like me to... Bathe you?" She finally made eye contact. "I'msorryI'msorry that's weird! I'm disgusting for suggesting that I'm sorry-"
"Darling," Tatsumi cut off her rambles. "Please calm yourself. I would love that."
So she did. As she always is in Tatsumi's eyes, she was gentle, and precise, paying attention to every part of his body. Her eyes lit up slightly more when she was allowed to wash his hair. Delicate fingers with a few faint cuts brushing through mint green hair: it all felt so therapeutic. Tatsumi nearly wanted to fall asleep from it all; nothing felt better than having the girl he loved taking care of him when he's too weak to do it himself.
"I'm done now."
Ah, his daydream has to end now. Still in a very dozy state, he turned to smile at her. She looked back with her own smile, as beautiful as ever.
Still disgusted at the thought of being seen as gross, Mayoi was still firm on refusing to dry Tatsumi's body. The former still wanted to help though, so she settled on drying the latter's hair after he was dressed.
"Would you like to stay with me a little longer?"
"Um, maybe..." Mayoi sounded unsure. "Hold on..."
Mayoi was focused on her phone, checking something.
"Oh, I think I have a Sweets Club session soon..."
"Ah, what a shame."
"Sorry..."
"It's alright. Have fun, love." Tatsumi approached Mayoi, their bodies standing awfully close to each other.
Mayoi smiled. That smile, God. Like the needy boyfriend he was, Tatsumi pulled her in for a chaste kiss to the lips, followed by one to her cheek. It was hard for Mayoi to not giggle when her boyfriend got lovey-dovey with her.
Unfortunately, he couldn't smooch her for the whole day. A moment later, Tatsumi was left alone.
What shall I write this time?
A few hours later, Mayoi returned to her dorm.
"Good evening, Ayase-senpai." Tomoya greeted.
"Um, good evening, Mashiro-san." Mayoi smiled nervously.
"By the way, I found a letter by the front of the door earlier that was addressed to you." Tomoya added. "I've left it on your bed."
"Oh! Thank you..." Mayoi gulped.
Could she even read this in the same room as Tomoya? She's always such a mess when she reads these.
__________
Dear Mayoi-san,
I love you, with all my heart.
That's very straightforward, isn't it? It's the truth, however. I am so thankful to have you. I have realised I've never had anyone close to me until you. I am well liked, I'm aware, but I cannot deny I pray for more than admiration. Something more. You and ALKALOID are so dear to my heart for that reason. To have all of you wonderful people trust me and see me as your friend makes me feel cherished. I am thankful to God for that. Life feels much more fulfilling now. It's still a new concept to have as many friends as I do now, but I will do what it takes to keep my friends and make them happy. I naturally grew fond of you when we first met. Something was different about you compared to our dear juniors. Perhaps it was because we were of similar age? No, it was always more than that, wasn't it? I was in love with you. I am in love with you. I will continue to be in love with you. I didn't believe I'd ever make it to heaven, but you've proved me quite wrong. Today and many other moments we've shared have made me believe that heaven could never compare to what I have with you. It's almost as if God has gifted me my own angel. I should thank Him for letting me be loved by you.
I love you, with all my heart.
-Tatsumi ♡♡♡
__________
"Ayase-senpai? Are you okay??" Tomoya panicked. "Why are you crying?"
Mayoi was, in fact, crying. From happiness. She really couldn't handle it; she's always felt so unloved. That brain in her head always convinced her she was unsightly, awful, undeserving of anything. She believed it, why wouldn't she? Now, her world is flipped outside down. Now, she has someone to hold her and tell her that she's beautiful, she's caring, she's heaven on earth, she's loved. Now, she has Tatsumi.
Before Tomoya knew it, Mayoi darted out of the room, tears still all over her face. She was gone, along with the letter.
"What could've possibily been in that letter?" He asked himself, completely bewildered. "Well... I hope Ayase-senpai will be okay."
Desperate to not sound aggressive, she attempted to gently knock on the door. She was still a mess, but she tried her hardest to wipe her face. How emotional of me...
"Heya, wha-"
That's not Tatsumi.
Mayoi failed to consider that Koga might've opened the door instead of Tatsumi, which wouldn't be that embarrassing if it weren't for the fact Mayoi looks like she cried like 5 seconds ago (which she did).
"Uh, you looking for Kazehaya-senpai?" Koga had no idea what was going on, but he could tell Mayoi clearly didn't look her best.
"Ah, um, sorry-" Maybe she should've just waited until tomorrow.
"Don't worry about it. I'll be headin' out, anyway." Koga turned his head to the inside of the room. "Kazehaya-senpai, yer... friend's?? Here?"
Koga walked out, allowing Mayoi to finally enter. Well, she stood between the doorway. She felt so embarrassed.
"Mayoi-san?" Tatsumi looked up from the bible he was reading. Upon looking at her face, he stood up and approached her. "Dear, are you alright?"
"I-I, uh..." She was going to tear up all over again. What was she even going to say? Thanks for the letter? I'm not as good as you say I am?
"Come here." Tatsumi's embrace grounded her, finally reminding her what she wanted to say. She buried her face between his neck, allowing his chin to rest on her head. "Would you like to talk about it sitting down?"
Too choked up to reply, she nodded, knowing Tatsumi could only tell from the movement he could feel she made beneath him. They quickly made their way to Tatsumi's bed. His covers were the same colour as his hair... Mayoi always smiled at the thought.
Naturally, they found themselves holding each other as they do when they cuddle. The familiarity calmed Mayoi down.
"It was about the letters..." She began abruptly.
"Do you not like them? I'm sorry if I've upset you, dear." Tatsumi immediately apologised.
"No, don't apologise. I love them. I love them so much..." She admitted. "It's just that... I'm so used to thinking I'm unloved. Everyday I think our relationship is too good to be true and you'll break up with me and tell me I can't be loved. I don't like thinking those awful things, but my mind convinces me I don't deserve you. But, the letters... they tell me otherwise. When I doubt how you feel about me, I read them; over and over, until my mind accepts it... What I want to say is: thank you, Tatsumi-san. I love you, with all my heart."
Mayoi was so focused on what she was saying, she simply stared at her fidgeting hand sat on her lap. Nervously, she glanced up at Tatsumi. He was... shocked? Surprised? No... In awe.
Tatsumi held her close and tight. Mayoi held him just as tight.
"I love you, Mayoi-san. More than anything." He whispered, just for her to hear.
"I love you, Tatsumi-san." She whispered back.
Koga was finished with his UNDEAD work for the night, meaning he needed to head back to his dorm. He always came back pretty early in morning, so he tried his best to enter as quietly as possibly, not really paying attention to anything other than getting to his bed. That night, however, he couldn't help but notice two lovebirds in the next bed over, cuddling each other, fully content with everything in the world.