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Opposites Attract

Chapter 14: Song and Dance

Summary:

Bowser learns a thing or two about ghost-hunting. Luigi embraces his courage when they all need it most.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

 

“HahahahaHAAA!” The Professor brought his slender hands together in a giddy little clap. “EXCELLENT!” He walked forward towards his very own pop-up laboratory. 

“Waaah…?” Luigi was stunned by the sudden expansion of the portable structure. It was an engineering miracle! 

“Come now! Posthaste!” 

“Sure.” Bowser answered as he ventured forward. Luigi shuffled in apprehensively, but Bowser got caught on the door. Specifically, his shell was too tall AND too wide to enter.

“Ah, apologies Bowser. You would have fit splendidly in my laboratory back in Evershade Valley! Eh…but my portable lab? No such luck.”

“...guess I’ll listen from here with Dante.” 

 

The koopa king let out a harumph as he crouched down to see inside. The Polterpup at his feet rubbed against his leg with a wagging tail. Bowser looked down briefly and grinned. 

 

“Sorry, amore…” The Italian-American winced as he looked up at him from inside the portable lab. 

“It’s fine, babe…” 

“SO!” Professor E. Gadd continued his introductions. “So you’re both probably wondering why I’m in this hotel…? It’s a long story-”

“I don’t really care.” Bowser replied. “Skip to the part where we come up with a battle plan.”

“...is he always like this, Luigi?”

“Not always.” Luigi answered with a noncommittal shrug.

“Hmph. Very well, Bowser.” The elderly man pointed at the various monitors behind him. “Here is where we were, and this is where we must explore further. If we want to capture the missing ghosts.”

“And save our friends!” Luigi added.

“...ah! Yes! I almost forgot entirely! To save your friends as well, yes yes.”

“So. We need to find those buttons. And I’m guessing we need to reach the top?” Bowser suggested.

“I believe you’re right, young feller.” 

“What kinda ghosts are we dealin’ with?”

“All of the ghosts I’ve been working with in Evershade Valley! And, some of those trapped in portraits! And-”

“Woah woah WOAH!” Bowser made them all pause. “You brought MORE ghosts?”

“Yes, but, well you see…I was invited under the guise of a ghost collection convention…quite the enticing offer!”

“JEEzus, Prof…” Luigi began to shiver where he stood. “Not a-all of ‘em…?”

“Yes, I am afraid…all of them.” He shook his head solemnly. “They’re normally very peaceful and friendly! But I suppose King Boo’s crown always had a way of….riling them up.” 

“W-we can’t HANDLE all of th-them!” The younger human began to breathe harder. "I b-barely survived...th-the last time..."

“That is where you are wrong, young feller. We will all be working together! We will be successful.”

“Gee, so we’re ALL gonna get vacuums?” Bowser asked dryly.

“Oh nonono! I don’t have enough car batteries for that! Mine died this morning, you see.”

“... C-CAR batteries?!?” Luigi began to call foul. “But I’ve never needed one!?”

“Ah. Right you are! You, Luigi my friend, do not require one!”

“W-why’s that?”

“Why, the Poltergust series can run off of your self-produced lightning!”

“.........r-really?” Bowser wondered. “Huh. I mean…you do look a little greener than normal right now, babe…”

“A-all this time…I’ve been…” Luigi looked at his own hands. Sure enough, he could feel a small surge of electricity dancing under his skin. “Mamma mia….”

“You are quite the magical and scientific marvel, Luigi.” Professor E. Gadd stated. “And that’s also what might help us with another invention of mine.” 

“What invention?” The two other men asked. 

 


 

The night was chilly. As it should be. Another crow flew past the penthouse windows. 

 

“Ah, there you are sir!” Helen Gravely floated forward. “Everything is going as planned.”

“If by ‘according to plan’, you actually meant ‘COMPLETELY WRONG’!?!?! Then yes, Helen. THEN you would be correct.” King Boo sulked. 

“Don’t gain heart, my king! The night is still young, and Luigi is completely helpless!”

“...perhaps you’re right.” The spectral king of the undead sighed. “As long as he never finds a vacuum, then we shall capture him soon enough…” Then he grumbled as he shook his head. “I don’t want to have to WAIT so long! Tell the staff to be on higher alert!”

“Of course.” She quickly set her face once more with her little powder puff before activating the hotel intercom system. 

 

“Attention all staff. Be on alert for-”

“Extra HIGH alert!” King Boo cut in.

“...yes. Extra high alert for the human guest wearing green: Luigi! If you find him, immobilize him, and bring him in…alive.”

 

“Ooh, a nice touch.” The king of the Boos floated closer after Helen turned off the intercom. “I DO want him alive. That way, he will experience his torturous, painting-Hell forever.”

“How wonderfully evil, sir!” Helen giggled at such a great plan for revenge. 

 


 

Bowser growled as he kept thinking about what was said over the intercom.

 

“….heh. Like I’ll EVER let that happen. They'll have to get through me. I'd like to see them try.” He grumbled as he scanned the area. He was stalking the halls of the shopping complex. “I just hope this Ghost-Cop sucks at his job.” He sighed as he got no answer from Luigi. 

“G-oooo!” A green slime creature with the stolen likeness of Luigi walked through the bars of another shop. 

“I don’t like that he looks like you…”

“Goo-oooh…” Gooigi flopped until its head hung down and its shoulders went slack. At the same time, Luigi took a stuttered breath back into wakefulness.

“Hhh- I know, Bowser. It’s weird, but ya know why we can’t just bust through walls…like last time…”

“…yeah.” The koopa’s face heated up in mild embarrassment. “That was too many ghosts. I’ll give you that, Luigi.”

“It’s just until we save ‘em. Okay?”

“...ok.”

“Cool… hh..” Luigi slumped back into Bowser’s arms as he began to pilot around Gooigi once more. The koopa could feel the gentle thrum of electricity just behind his partner’s eyes. It was unnerving. Still, there was something about Luigi’s bravery in regards to accepting to work with Gooigi in the first place…

“I’m still gonna complain.” Bowser grumbled. 

“-mm.” Gooigi nodded absentmindedly while shrugging its see-through shoulders. It was a sign Luigi had heard him loud and clear. 

 

Finally, they found the star-shaped key they needed to unlock the star shaped lock that was keeping the guard room closed. Gooigi was returned to the empty chamber of the Poltergust G-00 after a random sprinkler was turned on, and Luigi was placed down so they could walk together again. 

 

“Damn, didn’t realize ghost-hunting got so tedious.”

“I guess I’m gettin’ used’ta it. Which is probably NOT a good thing…” The human sighed. 

“Let’s get up there and tear that mall cop wannabe a new one-wwwwwwun?!”

 

The escalators began spinning faster and faster downwards, far too speedy for either of them to handle. 

 

“WAHH!!” Luigi was shot backwards. Bowser simply slid back down. 

“What gives!?”

“Gggggrrrr-UH!” A large, red, blocky looking ghost appeared on the floor above. As the specter charged, it took one look at Bowser, and halted where it floated. Dead stop. 

“...huh?” It confused the king of the koopas.

“Rrrr...?” The ghost was puzzled, as if they vaguely recognized Bowser. Then, they spotted the small human hiding behind the koopa's massive shell. “GRR!”

 

They fought the brute together. 

Luigi blinded the ghost, and Bowser lit it’s twin tails on fire. Then, after the powerhouse had clocked Bowser in the jaw, Luigi had the chance to start vacuuming the sucker up. They flailed and waved, scraping along the marble floors for purchase. Nothing. Luigi slammed the brute down four times across the floor, then they disappeared.

Reappearing behind Luigi, the human among them was punched into a nearby cleaning cart. Bowser was having none of that. He lit up the offending shade with another jet of flame. Bowser used his own shell to hide the fact that his boyfriend was sneaking around to the backside of the ghost. 

 

“HaHA!” Luigi caught hold of the bastard’s spectral tails once more, and finished the job. The ghost scrambled and wailed before being sucked up into the Poltergust G-00. 

“Damn!” Bowser huffed. “That thing hits almost as hard as a Whomp!”

“...that...was a Whomp...” The younger Alighieri brother mumbled. Then, the need to explain overtook him as he saw his partner’s disbelief. “W-well, E. Gadd calls ‘em ‘Hammers’, but…they’re uh… former Whomps.”  

“Oh hoho! Right you are, Luigi!” A small voice came through the Virtual Boo. “He was quite an aggressive one, wasn’t he? I’m surprised you both were able to catch him!”

“....r-really?” Bowser still couldn’t believe it. 

“...yeah.” His lover nodded. "Goobs were Goombas, Oozers were Koopas, annnnd...not really sure what Slinkers use'ta be." 

"He'll be a BIG help to my research, though!" Professor E. Gadd tried to make light of the discovery. "Hehe...you both keep up the good work, OK?"

"Sure." Bowser muttered before the professor ended the call. "You're serious...? They're all...?"

"They're almost all former troops of the Koopa Kingdom, amore. Though, I imagine most'a them are from before your time. I...don't think they really remember...?"

"The Great Jungle Wars..." The giant turtle in the room was unsure how to handle this information. "There were so many...WAIT. We're not. Killing them again, right!?"

"Nope. Just catchin' 'em. They're normally peaceful, actually." The human sighed. "Just...when King Boo is around, he has a way of makin' 'em just as angry an' violent as him...?"

"...I just never realized. That makes me want to take down King Boo all the more." Luigi relaxed as a familiar puff of fresh smoke left Bowser's snout. He was still in the fight. 

"C'mon. Let's take care'a that guard."

 


 

"I-it all just happened so fast! I wasn't even all the way awake when it happened!" Toad was still shaking where he sat inside the portable lab. "There was a broken piano, busted up theatre seats, and ripped up masks? What's THAT all about!?"

"I see..." Professor E. Gadd pondered as he recorded Toad's account of the night. For research. "The ghost captured, Amadeus Wolfgeist, was haunting that theatre. That piano, specifically."

"I-is Queen Peach and th-the others alright?!?"

"I won't sugar-coat it, young feller...most of them are captured, but Luigi and Bowser are doing their best to-"

"B-B-BOWSER?!??!?" Their rescued friend began to freak out. "...wait, why didn't I see Bowser helping him?"

"Huh? Now why would that be?" The elderly man activated a call on his monitor with one of the Virtual Boos at once. "...Luigi, my boy? Is there some reason that you and-"

"AAAAHAHHAHAAAAAA!!!" Luigi instantly hollered from the other end. Professor E. Gadd recoiled from the burst of sound. 

 

*Rr Rr Rr Rrrrr CRUNCH*   

 

Something was crunching in the middle distance. A menacing plant monster, and his spectral gardener friend, were attacking Luigi!

 

"PROF GIMME A SEC!!" Then, Luigi dropped his Virtual Boo. There was the sounds of screaming, hollering, crunching, munching, and the roar of a chainsaw. 

"AH!" Toad jumped back from the noises. 

"Hmm..." Professor E. Gadd ended the call. "Perhaps Bowser can give us a more clear, and far less loud answer...?"

"...I guess?" 

 

The human and Toad awaited the koopa king's response.

 

"Hello? Bowser? How are things-"

"I'M KINDA BUSY, OLD MAN!!!" Bowser roared. The volume of his response shook the portable lab!

"EEK!" Toad held his head in pain. 

"Bowser! Please! How did you and Luigi get separated?"

"RRRAGGGH!" Soon, the view switched to what Bowser was seeing. "I'm in the MIDDLE of something! SEE?" They saw a furious King MacFrights barreling their way atop a ghostly steed. Lance at the ready. 

"Oh... Could you...capture him?"

"Are you SERIOUS?!?" Bowser complained as he dodged. Then Bowser ended the call. 

 

"The bell invites ye!" King MacFrights hollered as another haunting bell tolled in the distance. "Hear it, Bowser!! May it summon thee to hELL!!! HEYAHHH!!" 

"SHUT UP!" In one swift motion, Bowser took hold of lance in the ghost's hand, lifting him off of his horse. The fake crowd made of poster board cutouts gasped. 

"Eh heh heh...?" The Scottish ghost winced right before Bowser ripped his bulky armor apart.

 

It wasn't too much of a competition. Bowser was by far the stronger king in the room.

He tore up the armor, fought King MacFrights, and shoved him in a crystal-lined jar made by Professor E. Gadd himself.

 

"Hmm, that takes me back..." Bowser commented as he looked at the shrunken-down, frightened ghost slamming his see-through fists against the crystal to no avail. "Have fun in there, tough guy!"

 

Bowser eventually picked up the discarded elevator button and made his way to the elevator.

At about the same time, Luigi trudged over, covered in yard trimmings from several plants. 

 

"Rough fight?" Bowser asked softly.

"You too?" Luigi stared at Bowser's shell. There were tons of arrows stuck to him. 

"Oh, these?" Before he could object, Luigi walked closer and began to remove them. "It's nothing."

"...I know y' can feel through your shell. Don't lie ta me." His human frowned. 

"...ok." Bowser averted his eyes as he allowed his partner to tend to him for real this time. "Are you alright?"

"Better, now." Luigi admitted. "Just wish the Professor didn't keep callin' at the worst times..."

"You too? He just won't quit it!" The king of the koopas began to pick leaves out of Luigi's hair.

"...there. Feel a lil better?"

"Tons, thanks." Bowser smiled weakly before reaching lower. "One more....there." He carefully picked a twig out of Luigi's mustache. He leaned down for a little kiss.

"Ah good! You both have reunited!" E. Gadd announced over the Virtual Boo all of a sudden. 

"UGHHH!" Bowser grumbled as he backed away slightly. 

 

The mission was the same. Their next objective was to get to the next floor. 

 


 

"Hmmm..." Helen Gravely sat at her ornate hardwood desk and petted her dear Polterkitty. 

"...mrow..." He ghostly cat let out a soft, contented sound. 

"There there...I know all this chaos is getting you riled up, my little Beatrice." She sighed. "Don't worry, Mommy has this handled."

 

Just then, there was a flash of something massive on one of the surveillance screens. She turned to see a whirring, blurred spinning object. As she observed further, it appeared to be a massive, spiked shell, ramming into Morty's stunt dummies. 

She squinted as she watched a gargantuan koopa with menacing eyes set fire to the set. Then, the being jumped back as a human and a....goo-monster? Two similarly shaped beings countered an attack from a not-so-ferocious facsimile of Godzilla. 

 

"Beatrice..." Helen growled. She could feel her Polterkitty trying to break free of her grasp. "Fine then...go have your fun, Darling... Stop them."

"MRowwwww!" Beatrice lept into the air, and phased through the floor of the penthouse. 

"....no one can find out." She grumbled as she applied another round of face powder. "Especially not King Boo." 

 


 

They were nearly there! It had taken them so long, it felt like multiple days to Luigi. He couldn't be sure, none of the clocks worked right. It was always night out. 

The couple walked carefully along the neon-lit area. They were on the 14th floor, the Dance Hall.

 

"This has to be the weirdest hotel I've ever been to..." Luigi admitted. 

"Yeah. I've seen weirder." Bowser commented.

"What?"

"You don't wanna know." 

"I do, but I'm fine with askin' later." 

"Luigi?" Bowser walked closer. "When we get up there. To the top...are you gonna be alright?"

"Um..." Luigi clammed up as he thought about it.

"....just remember: We can do this scared. T-together." 

"HM?" Luigi looked over. The king of the koopas was holding his own tail nervously. "Don't be scared!"

"WHA- So YOU get to be scared? But not ME?"

"If YOU'RE scared, then I'm gonna be even MORE scared!" Luigi walked up to the dance floor with Bowser close behind. He reached quickly for the next elevator button. 

"No! That's not how this-"

"Good eeeeevening Last Resort! How we doin' tonight?" A smooth, velvety voice asked over the speakers. "Are we ready to get groovy, baby?"

"......huh?" Both men looked forward as the dance floor lit up into a rainbow display of blinking tiles. 

"I saaaaid.... ARE YA READY TO GROOVE??!"

 

Suddenly, they were both thrown back by a wave of music exploding from the larger-than-life speakers on either side of the stage. 

 

"AHHHHH!!!"

"Now THAT'S more LIKE it! HeeeEEEeeeyyyy!!!" 

"....oh shit..." Bowser looked on after helping Luigi up. There were several ghosts playing keep-away with the next elevator button.

"Oh man!" Luigi rubbed at his aching shoulder. "How're we supposed'ta get it now?"

"...well," Bowser dusted himself off before offering a large clawed hand. "We could always dance for it?"

"....ya sure?"

"C'mon babe. Dance with me?"

"..........okie dokie." Luigi put on a brave face and joined hands with his partner. 

"Awwww, how sweet!" The ghostly woman at the turntables faked being cutesy toward their gesture. "Too bad DJ Phantasmagloria was told Luigi's a Solo Act..."

"Huh? WHA- HEYYYYY!" The giant koopa suddenly fell through the floor as several panels disappeared. 

"BOWSER, NO!!" Luigi was left pounding his fists on solid floor again. 

"Come on, Lui! Show us what you've got...or are you too chicken t-"

"Start. The Track."

"Huh?"

"I said HIT IT." Luigi glared at them all, Poltergust G-00 at the ready. 

 


 

Luigi didn't get much of a break after that.

And he was more worried than ever! Where did they take Bowser? Did he escape this time? Was he in a painting? Or on one of the floors below? 

His only moment of relief for now was that he had just defeated Helen, and was freeing his brother at long last.

 

".....uh? WOAH! Ooof!" Mario fell down onto the marble floor with a thud. "Ah, my nose..."

"...M-m-mario?" 

"Lu?"

"MARIIOOOO!!!" Luigi ran towards his brother and scooped him up in his arms. "Oh my gawd you're ok! -You're ok, right? RIGHT? Tell me you're alright, bro- I was so WORRIED!! And we were lookin' everywhere for ya!"

"Aww, Lu! My hero." Mario gave a tired smile into his brother's shoulder. "I'm ok. S-slow down, who's we?"

"Well, I mean.... Professor E. Gadd, Toad, the others?" Luigi caught himself before saying Bowser as well. 

"Mama mia...!" He readjusted the hat on his head. "Wait. Where's Peach?"

"Not sure. Maybe the roof? At this rate, I've scoured every nook an' cranny of this gawd awful place..."

"Come on!" His twin brother pulled at his arm. "This way! We gotta hurry!" 

"M-MARIO! W-wait! Slow down!" Luigi tried, and failed, to keep pace with his brother. "I've got bad knees!"

 

The trek up to the roof was tough on his knees indeed. That, and Mario threw caution to the wind. He was leaping and tumbling every chance he got! 

"C'MON LU!!!" Mario began leaping between two walls 

"Ughhhhhhh.....Mar-i-oooooo..." Luigi grumbled. "Ya damn show-off..." He went the long way around, and up some ladder and stairs. 

"HELP! Luigi! C'mon c'mon C'MON!!!" Mario begged him to work faster. 

"Woo...woo-ok....." The younger of the twins pointed the Dark-Light device at the painting of Queen Peach on the roof. In a few moments, she was freed. 

"...-WOO!" Peach floated out of the painting gracefully. Then, she felt her face and checked her arms. "I'm....free?"

"WAHOO!" Mario hugged her tight. "You're ok!"

"MARIO! LUIGI! Y-yeah! Are you both ok?!" She made sure to hug them both. 

"Yeah..." Luigi sighed. Then he got a rather uneasy feeling... "Wha...AHHHH!" They all spun around to see a furious King Boo staring down at them. 

"MWAH-Ha-huhhh...!" The king of the Boos laughed."How brash of you to come and face me, Luigi! You should have just run away while you had the CHANCE!"

"...huhh....huh..." Luigi was scared stiff.

 

He couldn't move, no matter how much Mario and Peach tried to get him to run with them. The only thing that froze the other two was the sight of the Toads, Professor E' Gadd, and...Bowser stuck in a painting together? 

 

"ARF ARF!!" 

"HUH?" Luigi realized all too late that he was knocked to the ground by his trusty little Polterpup, Dante. With that, Dante ran after another butterfly. 

"MWAH-Hah-huhhhh...??? Hm??" King Boo stared at the painting again. "One-two-three...four-five six...seven-eig-!!!" He gasped. "WAIT! There should be EIGHT! Who's missing?!" 

"....mm." Luigi shivered again once King Boo gazed down at him once more.

"grrrrrRRRRR!! LUIGI!!! What are you doing over there!!!" When he got no response from the scaredy-cat human, King Boo began to shout even louder. "UGHH! That is IT!! I am sick to DOUBLE-DEATH of you!!! You want to fight me? ME?!??! FINE! Let's go, Luigi! This is the end for you, ONCE AND FOR ALL!!! HERE I COME!!!"

 

It was so much worse than the first time. And the second time. There were no spooky halls to run away through. It was just him, King Boo, and the roof...

He tried his best to dodge. At least Luigi was getting better at that. There were fireballs, bombs, oversized ghost tongues, and lightning strikes galore! 

 

"Hold STILL!! Let me KILL you!" King Boo and his double shouted at the same time. 

"..." Luigi gave them no answer. 

"And how come you got Bowser to turn on me!?!? HUH?? What's up with that!!"

"..."

"...oh?" King Boo laughed. "You LIKE him don't you! Ugh, as if he'd ever find you worthy!"

"...hm." Luigi raised a brow at that. "Got some bad news for ya..."

"Wait." King Boo paused in his attacks. "He...? You...?"

"Uh huhhhh...."

"UGH, disGUSTing!!!" 

 

Now the attacks came faster, fiercer, and with zero mercy. Trees were uprooted, chunks of debris spiraling around them, and lightning at every turn! 

Finally, Luigi was able to shoot that third bomb into King Boo's toothy maw. 

 

"HMMPH?!" 3...2...1... "BLEGH!!!! Huhh...." He fell to the ground with a smoky mouth.

"C'mon...one last time..." Luigi huffed as he mustered the last of his strength. He aimed the Poltergust G-00 at King Boo's tongue.

"...g-goooo!" At the same time, he extended his green electricity to get Gooigi to do the same. 

"Whaaaa- OOF! OOF! WAAA!" King Boo tried to shake his large, blue tongue free. "Un-han' meee, Lui'i! Le' GOOO!!! Sto' i'!!!!"

"Night night..." Luigi growled. 

"N-n-nooooooooO!!!" 

 

And just like that, King Boo was sucked into the Poltergust. 

 

".....WOOH!" The slightly younger Alighieri brother picked up the discarded diamond. "Woah! Woah no nononononNONONO!" He droped it just as fast to catch the falling painting with everyone he loved still trapped inside. "Wooooh.....HUH?" 

And that's when the building began to topple.

 


 

They each felt feathery light. Then, there was a tug bringing them forward. 

 

Peach.

Mario. 

Toad. Cremini. Blewitson.

Professor E. Gadd.

Bowser...

 

"Hmm? Luigi?" Bowser immediately turned to see his darling human, safe for now, but clearly hurt. "LUIGI!!" He scooped him up and spun him around.

"B-bowser!" Luigi was shocked the koopa still had enough energy to spin around like this.

"Are you OK? I was so worried!"

”Am I ok?! Whadda ‘bout YOU!?!? 

“I’ fine!”

"Thank goodn-“

"AHEM." Mario growled from the sidelines. 

“...m-mario!” Luigi approached his brother after he was let down. “I have uh…I-I-I can explain!”

“It’s Bowser. Isn’t it…” Mario frowned. “Perché cazzo non me l’hai detto?”

“....” Luigi grew dead silent as his brother asked him why he 'didn't fucking tell him'.

“Come ‘ere.” Mario commanded. 

“Please. D-don’t be mad, I-”

“JUST- come ‘ere.”

“I-I’m sorry, Mario! I just-“

“DON’T! Talk…” Mario growled. When Luigi got closer, Mario wrapped him up tight in his arms. Luigi hugged him in kind.

 

They stood like that for a good long while. Just hugging, saying nothing. Luigi couldn’t help it but to start to cry. He was too nervous to hold the tears back, anymore. 

The others stared on as the brothers reunited. Cremini commented on how awkward this was, only for Toad to smack him upside the head. Bowser worried as they began to speak softer than what he could here from a distance. Professor E. Gadd offered to try to listen in on the Virtual Boo. Everyone declined.

 

“Lu. Let me say my piece. Capiche?

“...” His brother nodded silently.

“When you were in the hospital…after swimmin’ in the Hudson. I told ya… find someone that would fish ya outta that river, not toss ya back in. ” Mario sighed again, with a grumble. “And as much as I hate to say it, especially ‘cause he tried to rule the universe an’ marry my girlfriend a whole bunch’a times… Bowser did save your life ...” 

“More than once.”

“...we’ll get to that later.” Mario squeezed harder. 

“!!!……” Luigi hushed up again. 

“I was in Bowser’s mind, once. And I saw a lotta you there. At first, I thought he wanted to torture ya some more, it got me so fuckin’ ANGRY! …but I realize now that he likes ya instead. And…y’ really like him, too?”

“…” Luigi nodded yes once more.

“What I’m gettin’ at is…..…I’m gonna have’ta get over myself. Eventually.”

“Huh?”

“But you listen to me, Luigi Sebastiano Alighieri. If Bowser ever hurts you?...we’re all gonna kill that oversized terrapin. Y’ got that?”

“M-har-iooooo!” Luigi half whined-half laughed at the sentiment. 

“I’m not kiddin’!”

“Gawd, don’t!”

“A-and don’t stand here! Expectin’ me t’ HELP ya break it to the family! That’s YOUR mess, Lu!” 

“I know! I know!” Luigi finally began to smile again. 

“And I ain’t babysittin’ those little gremlins he calls kids!”

“Oh yes you are!”

“No I ain’t! You’re outta your FUCKIN’ mind!”

 

"Are they...ok?" Toad asked.

"They're fine." Bowser commented. "That's just how twins are." He snorted back a small laugh. "Trust me." 

"Bowser...?" Queen Peach approached. "You like Luigi?”

”Love, uh…actually.” 

”W-aaaaaaaah?!” All three Toads were astonished. 

“You both seem happy. I’m glad for you both.”

”Thanks Peaches…” Bowser sighed. “I’m assuming you’ll say next that if I break Luigi’s heart, the treaty’s off?”

”Instantly…” Queen Peach growled.

”Hmph. You’re pretty ruthless in your Queendom…I respect that.” 

“Good.” Queen Peach walked away. 

“….h-hey? Any way we can heal Luigi?” Mario suddenly asked. “He’s not feelin’ too hot.”

”…..ughhh…” Luigi looked exceedingly pale.

”I’d say, we could all use some healing and revitalization.” Professor E. Gadd proclaimed. “Gather around now, youngins! Posthaste! I have healing supplies!”

Notes:

Sorry, this last one took me a bit longer to hash out, but it is here!
This might be an unpopular opinion, but certain ghosts in the Luigi's Mansion series remind me of classic Super Mario enemies. So I ran with that. :D
The story is not over yet. I still want to cover Super Mario Wonder, as well as meeting the family!

UPDATE (06/12/24) - I'm going to be putting a pause again on writing, for the good old mental health. Hopefully will be back soon with another chapter. Life's just been crazy.