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"Ozzy, bitch, what are you doing here?! It has been a hot minute! Where've you been, boy?"
I stop and watch Ozzy catch Bee out of the air. She barely left him any time to put our beach umbrella down before hugging him, but I know he doesn't mind. He fills the whole place up with his laugh.
"Bee, babe, you know exactly where to find me. How come you don't come down and visit me at the lounge anymore?"
Bee sighs loudly and plants her face into Ozzy's shoulder.
"Oh honey, believe me, I try to. Things have been fucking crazy these past few months. I was just thinking about you the other day, though. I saw some hot little succubus walk into my party and I was like, 'I have not seen my fag hag bestie in forever, I should do something about that.' Trouble was I had about three kegs worth in me at the time so, by the time I woke up the next evening I totally forgot."
Ozzy puts her down and she turns to me. My entire body runs hot, and not in a sexy way. Interacting with sins other than Ozzy has always felt intimidating, but Bee is a different kind of intimidating. She's got this 'cool, popular chick you don't wanna look awkward in front of' energy.
"Hey, Fizz," she says sweetly, bending her knees to greet me. "How's my favorite imp boy doing?"
She smiles. I clear my throat and smile back up at her. Fuck, I forgot how tall she is.
"Doing just fine, Bee. You look as dazzling as ever."
She puts a hand to her chest and fakes a gasp. She shoots a glance over her shoulder at Ozzy, who hugs me with his eyes.
"I am just surrounded by gentlemen, today," Bee coos. "Vortex, you better get your pretty butt over here, baby, these boys are showing you up."
Vortex, who I've never actually met before steps out from the shade of a nearby tree. He nods to Ozzy and I before putting an arm around Bee's waist.
"You guys here for some peace and quiet, too?" he asks.
"Mm, something like that,” Ozzy replies. “Fizz and I are taking a much needed vacation after Greed's latest clown pageant—thankfully, Fizzy’s last.”
Ozzy's huggy eyes have become fucky eyes. I'm trying not to become a gibbering tomato.
“Fuck, I almost forgot to mention that,” Bee says. She gives me the biggest shit-eating grin I've ever seen from someone who isn't Blitz. "Fizzy, honey, your 'fuck you' performance to Mam was beautiful. Literal magic."
"Oh, you thought so?" I chuckle. "Thanks, you could say it was a long time coming."
"I saw a video of it at last week's party. You should have seen me cheer and lose my shit right there on the table while doing shots with everyone."
"I can confirm," Vortex adds, pulling Bee's waist closer to him. "I'm the guy whose phone she watched it on and then proceeded to throw in a honey vat."
"It slipped out of my hand while I was cheering!" Bee laughs, playfully smacking him in the chest. "And I apologized and got you a new one, didn’t I? Don't just tell them I wrecked it. I swear, I cannot take you anywhere."
Vortex smirks, and his other arm wraps around her waist. Now they've both got fucky eyes.
"It's a huge relief for both of us," Ozzy says, picking up our umbrella. "Fizz most of all of course, but no more sex robot manufacturing or business with Mam has had me in a good mood for days."
"Seriously, good for both of you,” Bee says. “Fuck that guy. He sweats bad vibes. Ozzy did I ever tell you about the time he tried to sell me on the idea of charging admission to Gluttony parties? Had some poor imp create a whole-ass presentation for it."
Ozzy scoffs. "Uh, no, but you better be giving those sweet deets right now girl."
I can feel my face lighting up. "Are we about to chill on the beach together and shit on Mammon? Please say yes. I so need this.”
Bee laughs. "I mean, I'm not usually first in line to shit talk but, for that sleazy bastard? I could make an exception. How about it, Tex? You okay to chill with these boys for a bit? There are some tasty cuddles in it for you, maybe."
Her voice drops to a dangerously lewd octave right at the end, and she throws her upper arms around Vortex's neck. He raises the coolest brow I've ever seen.
"Can't be mad about that," he says. I chuckle. I can appreciate a man with simple motivations.
I shoot out my arms and wrap them around Ozzy's huge, bulging shoulders and climb up on his back. My esteemed steed.
"You two are welcome to lay your towels out next to us if you like," I say invitingly to Bee, just before curling my lip. "Just give us a heads up if we end up in a splash zone."
Ozzy nearly buckles over. Vortex turns red and looks away.
Bee just stands there, encoring that shit-eating grin.
"You little fucking pervert, I love you."
We head out onto Envy's beach together, largely void of other demons right now. Ozzy said something about an event on the other side of the ring, but I have to admit I was only partially paying attention. He was taking his shirt off at the time.
I watch Vortex stake out a spot for us on the beach while Ozzy clears his throat and walks up alongside Bee.
"So Mam tried to woo you with a presentation? Are we talking spin-able boards and graphs?"
Bee nods. "I felt so bad for the imp he sent, too, especially since he’s the one who probably made it. The little guy put on his best suit and tie that morning just to get turned down after his opener."
Vortex audibly 'oof's.
"What in the fuck would Mam have been getting out of this, anyway?" Ozzy asks.
"It was some pitch for advertising," Bee replies. She waits until Vortex lays out their towels, then she summons a bunch of drinks with a flick of her wrist. She hands them around to us before continuing. "He said he'd promote my parties on his channels and socials if I implemented an entry fee he could keep a portion of. He just wanted an easy income from Gluttony, so I told him to pop up to Wrath and suck on a cactus."
"...that is the dumbest thing I have ever heard," Ozzy says, laying out our towels. "The most extroverted soul pleaser in all of hell needs help with outreach? Okay, Mam."
Everybody laughs at that one.
We're all laying down now, and I have to admit it's pretty damn cute watching Bee cozy up to Vortex. The guy is basically being smothered by a sentient lava lamp and couldn't look happier about it.
"Mammon doesn't believe in the concept of female talent," I say, losing myself between Ozzy’s pectorals. “Speaking as someone who spent a lot of time around him, I can confidently say he sent an imp to talk to you because he didn't want to risk pissing you off with his sexist remarks, Bee.”
“Oh I'd pay good money to see that smack down,” Ozzy muses.
“He hasn’t reached out to me about anything since then and, you know what? That's fine by me,” Bee says, chuckling. “I’m perfectly happy to ignore him and his toxic little slice of hell. I'm just sorry you had to put up with his crap for so long, Fizz.”
“Yeah, me too,” I mutter.
Ozzy and I are quiet for a while. I feel him lightly tap my back once or twice to check up on me, and I just squeeze him to let him know I'm still good. It always makes me smile when he does that.
Bee’s contagious giggling pings my ear just as I begin to feel my eyelids getting heavy. I turn my head on Ozzy’s chest to glance at her, but I can't even see what's going on from this angle. Thankfully, Bee leaves very little to the imagination.
“Oho okay, you wanna play games, boy? We can play games. Don't think you'll win with just two hands, though.”
Vortex starts to laugh instead of Bee, and I can see her hair and Vortex's tail flail around a bit. I laugh too, and so does Ozzy. We both sit up to get a better look.
“Wow, big bad wolf, look at all these weak spots you have,” Bee says teasingly, managing to both securely pin the guy and tickle him senseless with just three hands. Her saucy grin is back, just inches from his face.
I expect Vortex to surrender, but he doesn't. His tail brushes against Bee's leg and makes her squeak and flinch, and it only takes him a moment to turn the tables on her. Now he's on top of her instead, pinning her with an arm and making her convulse by tracing a claw around her thigh.
“All the better to lure you in with, Queen Bee,” he says softly, drawing out more giggling by wiggling his fingers. His smile is sly, but it looks so sincere. “Maybe having a tail with fur can come in just as handy, huh?”
I just watch them for a while. It's kinda mesmerizing, and I mean that in the least creepy way possible.
“They're so…open,” I mumble to myself. My heart skips a beat when I hear Ozzy hum to himself in reply.
“Something on your mind, Fizz?”
“Sort of. How's the saying go? ‘When in Rome?’ I guess I just feel a little…envious.”
Ozzy chuckles. “Well the cat is out of the bag now, Fizzy Frog. I’m happy to be as open or private with things as you're comfortable with being.”
I smile. “I guess there really isn't much point in staying subtle for subtlety’s sake, now.”
“...‘but?’”
“...but I guess I don't really wanna go full hog right off the bat, ya know? I've already learned a few lessons lately about where not being subtle can get me. Not raring to get into more of those situations. I want this, but...I don't wanna rush.”
Ozzy’s hand gently comes down across my back. I instinctively put my hand on his.
“That sounds like a wise plan for now, Froggy. We'll get there. And whenever you’re feeling the time and place, you let me know.”
“Thanks, Oz.” My smile gets a bit slutty, you know, like it usually does. “Still can’t get over how hot you looked standing up to Mammon on stage, by the way. I need to find reasons for you to come to my rescue more often.”
Ozzy’s smiles get sluttier, too. His whole body shifts, and me with it. Fuck, my heart is pounding.
“I mean, I’m sure I can find all sorts of safer ways to evoke that response from you.”
“You promise?”
“Please, babe. Just try and stop me. Finding fun, thrilling new ways to make my froggy croak is simply what I live for.”
He pulls me up to him, and I’m suddenly surrounded by conniving looks.
That’s all, folks. I’m officially putty.
“Ozzy, Fizz, come walk with me! Let's find some seashells. Someone's lost his cuddle privileges after antagonizing me so much.”
Bee is up again, shooting Vortex a bratty smirk. He just smiles back with that half-lidded, suave look.
Ozzy glances at me, and I nod.
“Seashells by the seashore~” he sings softly, standing up again and brushing sand off of himself. “Lemme guess; the next Gluttony party is gonna have an ocean theme?”
“How dare you read me like an open book,” Bee says. She's already taking strides down the beach, exploring the tide as it goes in and out. “I'm thinking cute little bracelets made up of teeny shells. Besties can get them together when they walk in and then they'll match and be all cute. The disproportionate amount of demons who get feelsy when drunk will be all over that shit and I. Am. Here for it.”
Ozzy chuckles. He turns to me, sitting in the sand on my butt, and his smile fades slightly.
“Coming, Fizz?”
I pause. Thankfully, Bee’s distracted, digging around in the sand. I don't think I’d have been able to handle both of them watching me when I say, “nah, go ahead, Oz. You two barely have time to see each other. Go and collect shells—I’ll chill here a bit and keep poor Vortex company.”
Ozzy blinks. He looks unsure, but shrugs it off. He goes over to join Bee, getting even deeper into the tide than her. Judging by the collection she's already managed to stack up on the beach, though, I'm not sure she'll even really need his help.
“I appreciate the company.”
“No problem. I take it she got fed up with your teasing?”
Vortex chuckles. He's got that seven mile stare in his eyes.
“Yeah, well, she usually does sooner or later. I assume you've been up to the human world, too, given your situation?”
“Once or twice with Ozzy, yeah. Why?”
“Humans got these little creatures called cats. They're soft and cuddly looking as all get out, so you just wanna pet them, but most of them are real independent and only want attention on their terms. You sorta end up playing a game of chicken with them, see how many pets they’ll let you have before the claws come out.”
I watch Ozzy playfully splash Bee, then immediately regret it when she sends a small wave into him by swinging her leg through the water. I can hear their laughter from here.
“So that's how it is, huh?”
“That's how it is.”
“I gotta ask, since you’re with a sin too. Do you...do you ever wonder how she chose you? Like, how you got chosen out of all the demons in all of hell? Cause’ I sure do—with Oz, I mean. Sorry if that's a weird question. I guess it's just been on my mind lately.”
I look up at him. His eyes haven't budged from the horizon but he's got this real zen look, now.
“You know, Bee is more than a celebrity in Gluttony; she's the reason hellhounds have such a strong sense of community,” he says. “Her parties might seem immature to other rings but they're a part of our ring’s culture. She brings out the energy of everyone that comes to them, and is a host, an entertainer, and an empathetic ear for anyone who might need one, to boot. So, do I ever ask myself how I managed to land a girl like that? All the time, my man.”
Bee shrieks and flies into the air when Ozzy uses his powers to heat the water around her. She cusses him out something fierce but laughs the whole time, legs pulled right up to her chest.
“I am thinking about things like that a little less often every day, though.”
“Really? How? You got any tips for struggling ex-clowns?”
“Honestly, it's sorta something you just realize over time. At the end of the day sins are just demons. They've got wants and desires like the rest of us. They want love, and they've got love to give. Well, most of them at least, right?”
He winks at me and stands up, stretching his palms together against the sky. He holds out his hand and nods in the direction of Bee and Ozzy.
“My advice? Just focus on each day as it comes and enjoy spending time with him. That's what Ozzy and Bee seem to do. Now c'mon, I bet you can't beat Bee in a wrestling match when you two are on our shoulders.”
Something in my chest ignites. I grab his hand without hesitation and put on my biggest, snarkiest grin since standing on stage and telling Mammon to go fuck himself.
“I’m sorry, are you challenging a performer to a game of balance? While he rides on a demon almost twice as tall as you? I like, I—I didn't hear you wrong, right?”
Vortex chuckles. “Let's just say I'm curious to see how well you hold up against Bee compared to another imp I know.” He looks over at Bee and whistles. “Babe, come here! Fizz says he can push you right off my shoulders without even trying!”
I choke on my own saliva as Bee turns right around.
“He said what?”
“He said you got no game, babe!”
Bee’s brow raises and I feel my earlier grin retreat fast. She puts a hand on her waist and crosses two more.
“Oh okay Fizz, come show me what you're made of, you little tough guy. I'll take you on. You game, Ozzy?”
My eyes connect with Ozzy and I watch his smile dawn like a sunrise. For a long moment we share a conversation with our eyes, and then he starts to stretch.
“Doesn't seem like a fair match to me, but sure. If Fizzy is in, then I'm in.”
“Aw, I'm sure you'll both do fine," Bee says. "Besides, we're here to have fun, yeah?”
“Oh, no, I was talking about you two. You've got no chance, Bee.”
Bee looks flabbergasted. Ozzy blows her a teasing kiss while his adjacent heads wink.
I feel my stomach leap into my chest as I'm suddenly lifted up high on Ozzy's shoulders, looking down on Bee's now fiercely competitive face, and on Vortex, who just looks happy to have his head sandwiched between her thighs. I extend my arms down to lock hands with Bee, and we start to push against each other.
"You may have the high ground, Fizz, but don't count this bitch out just yet—she might have a few tricks for you up her sleeve!"
I smirk. "I wouldn't dream of it, Your Highness. I humbly await whatever you have in store for me. I gotta warn you though, being half metal, I don't have nearly as many weak spots as your boyfriend. If you've got any medium-rare burgers on your conjuration menu though I'll fold like a cheap suit for one of those!"
Bee's facade fades in an instant when a snort becomes a laugh, and my smirk warms up just as quickly.
You know, Ozzy is always saying I need to take a break and relax more. If relaxing looks anything like today so far, I could probably get used to it.