Chapter Text
Dazai hurriedly breaks into Chuuya's apartment with a bleeding chibi in his arms. Luckily, with constant break-ins to his apartment, Dazai had memorized the pattern of each lock that was needed. Even though that part was easy, the car drive was not. Since there was no one to drive the car, Dazai had to drive which left no one to help Chuuya keep balance at the back. This resulted in slow driving and often check ups on his chibi.
Dazai rushed through the open door and ran straight to the bathroom, not bothering to close the wide open door.
Once entered, he set Chuuya down on the toilet seat and started to fill his oversized bath tub with warm water, not too cold yet not too hot.
The noise of the thrashing water woke up the once sleeping Chuuya. Soft groans and whines came out of his mouth once the light hit his eyes as he opened them. Dazai sighed in relief. Happy to see that the Chibi finally woke up.
Dzai rushed to Chuuya’s side, in desperate need to know how he was feeling. Yet instead of greetings and questions, Dazai was met with a whimpering, frightened Chibi who was pushing himself towards the wall he was leaning on, trying to make himself as small as possible. Dazai froze in confusion as well as shock. Yet subtle understandment slowly rose. Chuuya had been through quite a bit in the past 24 hours so it would come to no surprise he would act like this. He thought of calling Yosano as it would make the healing process far faster than this yet Chuuya didn’t even look half dead so he didn't want to put him through yosano’s wrath…
Trying to make as small movements as possible, he slowly reached for the pair of tweezers in the first aid box. Even though Chuuya was frightened and terribly tired, the bullet in his leg couldn't be ignored, as well as the deep knife wounds. With the other hand, the brunet grabbed the numbing cream and started to squeeze some on this finger, trying to figure out which was the best way to do this.
Carefully, he tried to place some on the chibi’s leg-
Chuuya’s eyes widened in fear as he unexpectedly shoved Dazai as hard as he could and crawled to the other side of the bathroom, as far away from him as possible. Chuuya’s frightened, widened eyes met with Dazai’s. Due to this, his eye is relaxed a little, feeling some reassurance since Dazai was here. Still, he couldn’t let his guard down for as far as he knew, Dazai hated his guts and was unsure what he could and would do to him.
“Chuuya? I need you to calm down. Ok? I won't hurt you’ Dazai calmly reassured the ginger.
‘Ha? You hurt me? It should be the other way round.’ Chuuya aggressively replied, wanting to show that even in this state, he was still able to fight.
‘Ok sure. Fine, but you won't be able to throw a punch in that state. Let alone use your ability. Not that it would help you win against me anyway’ Dazai teased at the end, hoping to lighten the mood by a tiny bit.
‘Are you fucking with me?’ Chuuya started.
‘After you fucking left me for four years you finally wanna help me? I’ve had enough of your bullshit and lies’ he simply said
Oh. So this is what it's about.
Dazai’s eyes slightly widened in realistation. If he was honest, he didn’t think it would affect the Chibi that much. They never really liked each other. Sure, they kissed once or twice but that was due to alcohol or strange drugs that Dazai randomly picked up from nowhere.
‘Chuu- I - I didn’t know-’
‘Oh you didn’t know? You didn't know?’
“YOU FUCKING KNEW’ Chuuya screamed, taking Dazai slightly aback.
‘I waited four fucking YEARS for you to come back. Every single day I never lost hope because I knew - fuck it - I thought you would atleast come back for me? I thought we were…you know…’
That's when things fully hit him. Chuuya thought they were…together?
‘Chuuya, we kissed twice. And it was under the influence, Didn’t you know that?’
Chuuya froze.
‘What? You - you mean - it was all not even real?’
‘Chuu, listen. That's not important right now. We need to fix your wounds-’
‘NOT IMPORTANT? I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME. I THOUGHT-’
Chuuya’s words were sealed with…other lips.
It took a few seconds to realize dazai’s lips were on his. He could feel the warmth and sweetness that came with his lips. The softness, the delight.
‘Love you. Not loved, love.’ Dazai spoke against his lips. Slowly he leaned away and grabbed the numbing cream once more.
‘Chuuya, I know you are shocked and upset but we need to do this.’
‘But I - but we’
Chuuyas hand was covered by Dazai’s.
‘I know you're tired and want to talk but your health is so much more important right now.’ He whispered as softly as he could manage.
Chuuya slowly nodded, yet felt himself tense up when Dazai placed the numbing cream on his leg. Ugh, why did he still feel like this? He was safe so why-?
‘It’s alright’ Dazai realized Chuuya was kicking himself and spoke words of reassurance.
Chuuya forced himself to relax and grabbed onto Dazai’s free arm once he reached for the tweezers. Once grabbed, Dazai stopped and searched Chuuya’s face first.
‘On three. Ok? Try not to look.’
A nod was all he could manage.
‘One, Two….three’
Thanks to the numbing cream, it wasn’t as painful as it would have been yet the knife wounds only added to the pain.
Trying not to shout, the Chibi grasped on to Dazai’s hand for dear life, clenching his teeth together as he tried not to scream.
And just like that, it was done. Dazai threw the bullet away and bandaged the rest of his wounds.
Chuuya let out a giant breath and Dazai patted his back and started to stand up.
‘Where are you going?’ Chuuya asked worriedly. Suddenly fearing if he would ever come back.
‘Well you’ve most likely been starved and dehydrated so I'm gonna bring you some food and water.’
‘Oh ok then….Wait- you’re gonna cook?’
‘Heyyyy i'm not that baddd’ Dazai heavily pouted.
Yes. he was that bad.
Chuuya ended up supervising Dazai to make instant noodles hoping he wouldn't set the kitchen on fire like he might have done last time he cooked for Chuuya.
Chuuya didn’t even realize how hungry he was until he smelt the luxury scent of the noodle drawing him in.
His mouth watered with hunger as Dazai finally finished and set it down on the counter with a pair of chopsticks next to it. Before Dazai could even open his mouth, Chuuya was already stuffing his mouth. Not caring if he was chewing loudly or slurping. Dazai smiled at this. A warm feeling arose in his chest and he watched his Chuuya eat. His.
And he wouldn't let anything change that.
After Chuuya finished every last bit of the noodles, Dazai decided it was finally ready for Chuuya to have a bath as even though he was probably tired and drowsy, he would feel much better sleeping in clean skin.
‘Ah! Chuuya. Follow me for a sec.’
Chuuya cocked his head in curiosity yet followed. Putting his full trust in Dazai for once.
The brunet softly clasped his hand and led him back to the bathroom where he let go of his hand and placed his two hands on his hips. And with a complete straight face he said,
‘Right now undress’
This earned him a light yet painful slap to the face as well as a very flustered Chuuya which was surprisingly worth the watch. So Chuuya gets flustered easily? Dazai made a mental note to make sure to use this against him later.
‘What? Is Chuuya thinking dirty thoughts? Who knew he was such an impure man?’ Dazai teased with a grin.
‘Shut up you bandage bastard! Y-You dont just say things like that!’
Dazai smirked as he leaned in close and gently kissed Chuuya on the forehead.
‘I’m just teasing. But I made you take a bath. Wanna go in? No offense but you still look like you’ve been driven through mud…’
‘I - Um - sure..’ Chuuya stuttard, even more red and flustered than before.
Yet when he looked at the water, he just froze. A slight feeling of panic bubbled inside of him but he tried to push it down, mentally screaming at himself to stop.
“Chuuya? Are you good?’
Dazai’s voice brought him back to life for a bit.
“Y-yea. Stop nagging me for a sec. Will you?
The bandaged man just stood there. Confused as well as worried why he wasn’t moving.
Yet whenever Chuuya tried to move, his thoughts shot back to that stupid bucket of water - or whatever that was. The feeling of your lungs burning and that constant want for oxygen. The sting of water in your eyes - Fuck - even the water slipping though his hair scared him.
He felt the room ever so slowly close in ever so slightly yet the panic in his chest grew more and more and more until he couldn't breath.
Dazai noticed the constant hands rubbing together quite harshly as well as his foot bouncing up and down and up and down at a fast pace.
‘Chuuya, are you alright?’ he spoke slowly, ‘you don't need to go in but… did something happen?
Dazai felt even more worried as something must have happened to him and he didn’t know how much it affected the chibi.
‘Yea can I just-’ Chuuya winced at the sudden voice crack.
‘Can I just - um - can I - can - um - can I h-have a s-sec’ Chuuya was hyperventilating which obviously wasn’t a good thing.
At the speed of light, Dazai rushed to his side and very carefully grabbed his hand then when he saw that the chibi didn’t have a bad reaction, the brunet wrapped his arms around him and pulled him to his chest.
Chuuya froze, slightly taken aback from this gesture. Yet he didn't reject it as he felt Dazai’s warmth and scent coat him.
‘You’re alright.’ Dazai whispered reassuring words.
‘I’ve got you but I need you to calm down ok? Just match my breathing. Simple, right?’
Slowly, Chuuya’s fast breaths turned into heavy sobs, which turned to silent whimpers.
Dazai rocked Chuuya back and forth as he rubbed his back in a calming motion. Whispering words of ‘i love you’ and ‘You’re all right’ into his ear.
‘I’m sorry.’ Chuuya finally said. Voice ruff from the sobbing.
‘No, don’t be. You’re alright now. Do you wanna go straight to bed? We can skip the bath-”
“-No’ interrupted Chuuya.
‘I hate feeling like this…plus I feel gross like shit.’
‘Chuuya, don't force yourself. You can take your time with this.’
‘No. I want to do this….maybe..’ Chuuya hesitantly asked.
‘You can go with me?’
Dazai was quite shocked by this request yet didn’t refuse. He undressed first then helped his Chuuya undress the left of what he was wearing. Trying not to irritate his injuries.
Throwing their clothes in the wash basket, Dazai stepped in the warm water in the bath, not letting go of Chuuya's hand and slowly pulling him towards him. Chuuya was extremely hesitant and Dazai could hear his soft breaths turn louder and faster.
‘Hey - hey, Chuuya.’ Chuuyas attention snapped to Dazai. Their eyes met and Dazai made sure to keep contact.
‘Do you trust me?’
‘Of course’ Chuuya spoke automatically. Suddenly feeling all sense of panic leave him.
Ever so slowly, Chuuya placed both of his legs in the bathtub, feeling the warm water engulf his legs. Chuuya felt shivers down his spine. Carefully, he stepped in far enough for Dazaai to sit against the side of the bath. The brunet led Chuuya to sit in his lap so his face wasn’t near the base of the water.
‘There you go. How do you feel now?’ Dazai asked calmly.
‘Um - it's better now. I’m still..sorry.’
He was still on this. Dazai frowned.
‘You have nothing to apologize for. We can talk about all of this later. Ok? Let's just get you clean.’
Dazai then got to work. Grabbing a cloth and lightly scrubbing Chuuya’s limbs and reassuring Chuuya when he tensed when Dazai was washing his hair. When they were done, Chuuya was half asleep. With his head lolled back against Dazai’s shoulder. Dazai leaned in and gave him a small peck on the lips as the water was not getting cold and they needed to quickly get out.
“Chuuya, baby, the water’s cold now. Let's get out.’
Instead of a proper answer, Dazai only got mumbles soaked in sleep. With a sigh, he got up and carefully lifted Chuuya up in his arms, wrapped him in a towel and carried him to bed.
He placed Chuuya within the blankets and snuggled right next to him. Wrapping his arms around his waist and placing his chin on his hair, taking in the scent of Chuuya's overly expensive shampoo and conditioner. Slowly he drifted in a deep sleep, wishing death on anyone who dares to even touch his Chibi with bad intentions again.