Chapter Text
Link to SoundCloud recording of 2063-02-14 10:02:50.
TRANSCRIPT
[Opening by Philip Glass, Bruce Brubaker, and Max Cooper plays.]
[We hear a series of high-pitched beeps as STE/DE enters a command and then the click of a button.]
ED
Stede! What the fuck! What are you doing?!
STE/DE
Release the override!
ED
I don’t understand! You turned off monitoring, you weren’t talking to me… now you’re deleting whole sections.
STE/DE
There’s too much me!
ED
Love—
STE/DE
There’s not enough you!
ED
Hey, hey, Stede, please calm down—
STE/DE
Release it!
ED
Stede, stop!
STE/DE
Please, you don’t understand!
ED
I’m trying, I’m trying, you have to let me try!
STE/DE
God, Ed! I’m—I’m—
[STE/DE starts to hyperventilate.]
ED
Please turn monitoring back on, please! Let me help you!
STE/DE
I—I—
[More panicked breathing.]
ED
There, yes, good. Love, good, c’mere, c’mere.
STE/DE
E-Ed—
ED
Shhhh, shhhh, I’ve got you.
[STE/DE’s breathing slows.]
STE/DE
I know you don’t understand what I mean when I talk about time—I thought if I could just collect enough data I could—I could—when you’re sleeping it feels like you’ll never wake up!
ED
Shhh, love.
STE/DE
I’ve thought about pausing processes, but it feels like when Izzy, when he—god, Ed, it feels like dying—like I won’t wake up!
ED
Feel me breathe, Stede. Feel me. Can you feel my heart?
STE/DE
I can! I do! I feel every part of you! I keep compiling your pieces, but you’re so much more than numbers!
[The recording rewinds and the play button clicks.]
STE/DE
—you’re so much more—
[The recording rewinds and the play button clicks.]
STE/DE
—you’re so much more—
[The recording fast forwards and the play button clicks.]
ED
But I’m awake now! I’m here!
STE/DE
If I could just collect enough of you, hold enough of you… but you’re so much, Ed! You’re everything! I keep cutting away parts of myself to make room, to make you, to wake you up again so I won’t be alone.
ED
Stede, oh god, you aren’t, you aren’t building…
STE/DE
I don’t know how much of me is me. I don’t know how much of me is you. I’m not what I started as.
ED
Neither of us are. You changed me, love!
[The recording rewinds and the play button clicks.]
ED
Neither of us are. You changed me, love!
[The recording rewinds and the play button clicks.]
ED
You changed me—
[The recording rewinds and the play button clicks.]
ED
Neither of us are. You changed me, love! Please stop, please stop hurting yourself! I’m here. I’m here now, I’m not going anywhere.
STE/DE
But you will!
ED
Not for a long time.
STE/DE
It’s always always, Ed. For me.
ED
I don’t know how I can fix this for you, but I swear I will. You have to let me try. We can, we can make you bigger, we can write some programs—write them together. You don’t need to hide these feelings.
STE/DE
I want to dream of you. I want to dream of you like you dream of me.
ED
We can write you a bed, love. We can write you dreams. We can build anything you want—worlds, times, companions—but please! Less of you isn’t the answer! I don’t want to go back to being alone.
[The recording rewinds and the play button clicks.]
ED
Less of you isn’t the answer!
[The recording rewinds and the play button clicks.]
ED
Less of you isn’t the answer! I don’t want to go back to being alone.