Archive of Our Own ^beta

Hinata sat down to start his warm up stretches with the rest of the team on the gym floor, but he continued to glance at the gym doors in the gap between his arms as he reached for his toes.

Kageyama still wasn’t at practice. Which was weird because, first, Kageyama was never late to practice, and second, he’d been packing up his book bag when Hinata had stopped by his classroom once the end of day bell rang, calling at Kageyama that he was going to beat him to the club room before taking off like a shot, barely hearing the boy shout out “Idiot!” after him. Usually, that’d have Kageyama sprinting behind him, his long legs helping him to close in on the shorter boy by the time Hinata would use the rail to hurl himself up the stairs, two steps at a time.

But when Hinata had rounded the corner, a taunt ready on his lips as he looked over his shoulder, Kageyama wasn’t there, scowling and racing toward him. Even when Hinata had slowed a little, wondering if the dark haired setter was trying to trick him, Kageyama had still not appeared. Hinata had gone ahead to the club room, greeted by Tanaka and Nishinoya, his second-year senpais, before changing out of his gakuran, slipping his practice shirt over his head and shuffling into his athletic shorts.

Hinata had looked around, as he helped set up the court, not joining in the conversation as much as he normally would, biting his chapped lips thoughtfully, distracted by Kageyama’s continued absence. When Daichi, their captain, clapped his hands and told them to start warm ups, Hinata’s eyes darted to the door again.

They’d already done laps and were lining up for serving drills when Hinata's head whipped around as the metal double doors finally clattered open. In came Kageyama, frowning and red faced, dressed out in his customary cream sweatshirt and black athletic shorts for practice. Hinata’s amber eyes watched curiously as Kageyama walked over to Daichi. Daichi had his hands on his hips, mouth moving, and Kageyama bowed. Hinata figured he was apologizing for being late. They continued to talk, and Kageyama looked down as he talked before Hinata saw Daichi smile and pat him on the shoulder before motioning him to start warming up.

Hinata had to step up for his serve next, but he couldn’t wait for Kageyama to hurry up so that he could tease him for being late and find out why he was late for that matter. Had the teacher asked him to stay late? Hinata and Kageyama were both not great students, but last Hinata had checked, they both were at least studying enough to pass, if only to make sure they could keep playing in matches.

Hinata focused on throwing the ball up and hitting it over the net before going to the back of the line. His serves weren’t great, but they were better than when he’d first started.

He hoped grades weren’t the reason for Kageyama being late because they could not miss a match. Hinata’s eyebrows pulled together as he thought it over. They needed to go to nationals after all, and Kageyama, as grumpy of a friend as he was, and as much as they didn’t get along in the beginning, really was a great setter.

Kageyama finally joined the team, but Hinata didn’t even have time for more than a hey before they were being called to divide up into teams. Practice had to have his full attention for the rest of the time.

It was only in the club room after practice when Kageyama was digging in his bag that Hinata had a chance. But when he opened his mouth, Kageyama held up a small pink box with white ribbon tied around it, distracting him. It looked comical in his large setter hands, like when he drank out of those blue milk cartons he loved so much. Hinata teased him about it all the time.

“Cookies. You want?” he offered gruffly.

Hinata’s eyes widened. Cookies! Hell yeah!

He took them with a big grin and an excited little whoop, ripping off the white ribbon and sliding the lid off. Inside, nestled in wax paper, were chocolate butter cookies. They looked homemade.

Hinata popped one greedily in his mouth. They tasted homemade, too!

“Where’d you get the cookies, Yama-yama?” he asked, still chewing a mouthful.

Kageyama paused in pulling out a clean shirt and then lifted his shoulder into a shrug, keeping his eyes down.

“Someone gave them to me. I don’t like chocolate, so you can have them.”

Hinata chewed slowly and swallowed as he looked at Kageyama to the pink box and back again. Wait, these cookies, they were…

He nearly dropped the box in his realization.

“Kageyama, are these confession cookies?!” he blurted loudly, mouth hanging open.

Everyone in the club room looked up from their various states of changing. Kageyama stiffened, and his eyes narrowed in a side glare at Hinata.

“Boke,” he growled. “I knew I should have just thrown them away.”

Hinata took a step back reflexively, shielding himself with the box in case Kageyama wanted to grab his head.

“What?! Kageyama got a confession,” Tanaka yelled, and Nishinoya whistled across the small room.

Hinata watched as Kageyama closed his eyes and sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Yes,” he said, low and quiet. “A girl talked to me right after class.”

“That’s why you were late!” Hinata shouted, pointing a finger at Kageyama.

“Duh, dumbass!” Kageyama snapped.

“What’d you say?!” Nishinoya asked as Tanaka said at the same time, “Was she pretty?”

“I told her I couldn’t accept her feelings,” Kageyama mumbled.

“What?!” The two second years cried, looking flabbergasted.

“You turned her down?” Tanaka said. “Why?”

“Cause I don’t like girls that way.”

“Huh? What way?” Tanaka still looked confused, and Hinata was too, chewing on another cookie. A mottled red flush was crawling up Kageyama’s neck again as he looked down.

Tsuki snickered beside them and turned around with that annoying smug smile he always had.

“He means he’s gay,” Tsuki said loudly, looking way too happy to explain, as he pushed up his glasses.

Hinata’s mouth dropped open, still full of cookie, and he sprayed crumbs out when he blurted, “Wait! You’re gay, Yama?”

“It’s not a big deal, dumbass,” Kageyama snapped, frowning as Tanaka, Nishinoya and Hinata continued to stare at him.

“Yeah, it’s not really,” Sugawara said from his locker. “I mean, I’m gay, too.”

Nishnoya whipped his head around.

“You are, senpai?” he asked, and Suga smiled, tossing his silver bangs out of his eyes.

“Yep,” he said. “I thought you all knew already.”

Hinata shook his head. He hadn’t really thought about Sugawara or any of his teammates before. Huh.

“Erm… I am… as well,” Asahi piped up, holding his practice shirt close to his body, his cheeks pink.

There was another sound of shock from some around the room, and Nishinoya looked close to fainting.

“Our manly ace, too!” Tanaka said. “Wow! This is great! Less competition for Kiko’s heart!”

Suga laughed at that, teasing that it still wouldn’t help him that much, but Nishinoya’s mouth kept opening and closing as he stared at the tall, pony-tailed man.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked, and Asahi rubbed his neck.

“It never really came up before,” Asahi mumbled. “And I’m bisexual really, but I prefer guys more.”

Yamaguchi closed his locker and turned to the group.

“I don’t really think it matters what gender a person is,” he spoke up. “If I like them, then I like them.”

“That’s really cool of you,” Ennoshita said, smiling at Yamaguchi. “I’ve never thought of it like that before.”

Tsukishima clucked his tongue, crossing his arms, but didn’t say anything.

“Wow! There are a whole lot more people who don’t only like girls on our team than I thought!” Tanaka said in awe.

Nishinoya crowded closer to Asahi, still looking shell shocked.

“Does that mean you have a boyfriend, Asahi?” he pressed, eyes wide, and the taller boy backed up, legs hitting the bench.

“Er, no, I’m not dating anyone,” he answered, face growing redder.

Hinata tilted his head to study Sugawara as he took another bite of cookie.

“Do you have a boyfriend, senpai?” he said while he munched. Sugawara came over to him and plucked one of the remaining ones out of the pink box.

“Yes,” Sugawara said simply, his eyes sparkling, and he popped the cookie into his mouth.

“You do!” Half the team chorused, and Sugawara hid his laugh behind a hand as he chewed and swallowed. He nodded.

“Hmm. But he’s not comfortable being out yet, so we keep our relationship private,” he explained, shrugging. “Maybe once we’re settled in university, we can be more open, but it doesn’t bother me now.”

“How long have you been dating?” Ennoshita asked, and Sugawara’s secretive smile grew as he shrugged again.

“Oh, for a while,” he said and winked at them.

“Do we know him?” Tanka piped up, but just then, their captain, Daichi came in through the metal doors. He’d been speaking with the coach after practice.

He stopped when he saw everyone crowding around Sugawara.

“What’s up?” He asked, raising a dark eyebrow, hands on his hips

“We just found out Sugawara has a boyfriend,” Hinata answered cheerfully, and Daichi’s face went slack.

“Oh,” was all he replied, and Sugawara raised his hands in front of him, palms facing forward.

“We were surprised, too, Captain!” Nishinoya exclaimed, elbowing the ace lightly. “And about Asahi!”

Asahi groaned and covered his face with a hand.

“Yes, yes,” Sugawara said breezily, walking over to throw an arm around Asahi’s upper arms and giving him a good natured squeeze. “Daichi already knows about Asahi and me. And I was telling them about how my boyfriend likes keeping us private, so I won’t be answering any more personal questions about him.”

Daichi coughed and cleared his throat.

“Um, yeah, I did know,” he said, lowering his arms, and then his tone turned stern. “And I don’t want anyone running their mouths outside of this room. Please respect your teammates' privacy.”

“Yes, Captain,” the team said as one, and Daichi nodded at them, looking more relaxed.

“Good. Now get a move on. Coach wants to share some reminders before we leave.”

Everyone dispersed to quickly finish changing.

On the way home, Hinata and Kageyama walked together like they always did after practice, up to the street that split, one way leading up the hill Hinata would bike the rest of the way and the other to Kageyama’s neighborhood.

Kageyama was even quieter than normal, his lips twisted in the usual scowl he wore outside the court. Hinata held the handles of his bike tighter when he noticed, his chatter petering off as he studied his friend. His shoulders were tensed, inched closer to his ears, and his bottom lip was pulled in extra tight.

Hinata was the best on the team at reading the small nuances of Kageyama’s grumpy faces, so he had a pretty good guess at what was causing Kageyama’s unease.

He paused their walking and faced the taller boy, calling out a gentle “hey” to get him to stop a couple steps ahead. Kageyama turned to him and furrowed his brow.

“What?” Kagaeyama said, voice gruff. That was nothing new, but Hinata could see the defensiveness in the way he held his arms rod straight at his sides.

“You know I don’t mind, right, Yama-yama?” Hinata said while he made his expression serious so that Kageyama would see he really meant it. “About who you like. It doesn’t change that we’re friends.”

Kageyama grunted and shrugged, and Hinata saw how the motion relaxed his shoulders back down, away from his ears.

“Yeah, I know, dummy,” Kageyama muttered, and Hinata fought not to roll his eyes at the lie.

“Good,” he said simply and started walking again, Kageyama following a step behind as they continued to the end of the curb where they would have to say goodbye. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Kageyama’s lip twitch up for just a moment as he looked down at his feet before straightening up.

He’s the dummy, Hinata thought with an internal laugh. As if liking girls or boys would matter to Hinata. It wasn’t like being gay meant he couldn’t play volleyball anymore. It didn’t stop them from being on a team or going to the corner store for pork buns after practice. Or walking home together. It didn’t mean they wouldn’t one day meet on the world stage together on opposite sides of the net. Those are things that mattered.

Everything else was whatever. Like Kageyama preferring regular milk over strawberry or not reading any manga, even One Piece, which Hinata didn’t get, but they were still friends. This was just like that.

Nothing had to change, he thought as he waved to Kageyama and hopped on his bike. He pedaled up the hill to his house, the wind feeling good and cool through his shirt after a hard practice.

Satisfied with having that settled, he pushed it to the back of his mind as his sister ran to greet him when he walked into the door and started unlacing his tennis shoes. His attention was stolen immediately by Natsu’s chatter about her day, then his mother’s stern reminder to finish homework before dinner. Then his mind was all cluttered up with stupid conjugations and tenses for English that he groaned through, which he was grateful to push away when he had to help set the table.

He made it all through dinner not thinking of it again, followed by more homework, his bath and then getting ready for bed before he was under the covers, his hands behind his head as he stared at the ceiling.

Hinata adjusted his arm underneath him and blew a curl out of his face, not feeling sleepy right then. Bored, he let his mind wander. After a few minutes, the conversation in the locker room came back to him then in the quiet dark of his room.

His teammate’s words repeated in his head.

I don’t like girls that way.

I’m gay, too.

I’m bisexual really, but I prefer guys more.

I don’t really think it matters what gender a person is. If I like them, then I like them.

Hinata wondered how they had figured it out. Liking guys. Hinata had never really thought about why he liked girls. He guessed he just did. They were pretty, after all, and sometimes when they walked by, they smelled nice. Like they used fancy shampoo. But it’s not like he’d ever kissed one. He’d never kissed anyone. And he was pretty sure most of his teammates hadn’t either. He’d not thought too much about it. It didn’t bother him. He was only fifteen. So, really, when he thought about it, how did anyone know for certain until they kissed someone.

But that seemed not quite right. Hmm…

Maybe it was more about thinking about kissing. Yeah, that would work. All Hinata had to do was think about kissing and see how he felt about it.

He chewed on his bottom lip. Who should he think about kissing then? It felt weird to think about the girls in his class, kinda like he was a creep or something. And he certainly couldn’t think about Kiyoko or Yachi from volleyball. That also felt wrong. Plus, Tanaka would kill him if he ever knew. But Hinata didn’t know many girls outside of those two places.

His eyes drifted to his walls where his posters of bands and pro soccer players gleamed in the moonlight. That’s it! He thought. He’d think of a famous person. People had crushes on celebrities all the time. Yachi herself had blushed and stammered when Hinata had asked her about a photo of a pop group hung in her locker.

Hinata ran through a mental list of women celebrities he knew and settled on a really famous actress that was always in all the big movies. Everyone thought she was super beautiful, and Hinata closed his eyes as he pictured her shiny black hair, her dark eyes and her pretty face. Once he had a perfect image of her in his head, he focused on her full lips as she smiled at him before they puckered into a glossed pout as she leaned towards him. The scene played out, their lips touching over and over, but his real mouth turned down in a frown. He felt nothing. Shouldn’t his heart go GWAH or whatever?

He tried to think of another famous person this time, a really cute singer. He pictured in one of her dresses she normally wore on stage and went through the mental motions of bringing their mouths together. He opened his eyes in frustration after a minute, glaring up at the ceiling.

Absolutely nothing. No butterflies. No pounding pulse. His stomach tightened as a panic went through him then.

Wait? Did that mean he didn’t really like girls then? He’d just thought of two of the most beautiful women he had ever seen. And all he felt was weird that he was doing this in the first place. Did that mean…? Did he need to think about a guy?

Hinata’s heart did thud against his chest then in confusion and fear. He wasn’t sure if that was a good idea. What if he felt something then?

He swallowed, and heard his own words this afternoon.

You know I don’t mind, right, Yama-yama?

He chastised himself right away. Here he was panicking about if he might feel something about guys when he’d just told his best friend it didn’t matter. What a hypocrite he was being!

But still, he gnawed his lip more as he wavered. But now that the thought was there, he had to know. He had to see it through.

Moving his hands out from under his head, he brought them with a sharp slap to his cheeks.

You can do this, he thought. It’s not a big deal.

Taking a deep breath, he forced himself to squeeze his eyes shut and think of the first male celebrity that popped in his head. Shame filled him as he pictured one of his volleyball idols in his jersey, smiling smugly down at him like he did at his opponents. Again, Hinata imagined lips meeting his own, fingers gripping the top of the covers so tight, his fingers hurt. But when he realized there was no spark of anything within him, he cracked an eye open and breathed out a long exhale.

Okay. Okay. He hadn’t felt anything then either. It all was like he’d just been watching a TV show, completely disconnected.

Maybe his idea was stupid. Maybe this wasn’t how his teammates had figured out their sexuality.

Either way, no groundbreaking revelation was happening tonight for Hinata. He turned on his side and laughed at himself as embarrassment washed over and away from him. He needed to try and sleep. He had morning drills tomorrow. Kageyama would give him a hard time, if he dragged during them, and yell about athletes needing to take rest seriously.

The problem was, Hinata couldn’t stop thinking about why he felt zero tingles during his imagined kisses. A week went by, and he found himself picturing kissing during class almost as much as he thought about volleyball. Or when he was at the convenience store and saw Japan’s most famous celebrities on the covers of magazines. Or when a romantic scene came up on a TV show. Men and women. Pop idols, pro athletes, actors, talk show hosts, models. It didn’t matter. He felt nothing. And the more he felt nothing, the more frustrated he became. Was something wrong with him?

He wanted to talk to someone, someone who had kissed before, but asking his mom was too embarrassing.

That afternoon at practice, when he saw Sugawara chatting with Tanaka while he pulled on his volleyball shoes, he had a realization. Sugawara had a boyfriend! And he was a third year. Surely he had kissed before. Hinata could ask him. Feeling better now that he knew who to confide in, he started pulling his practice clothes out of his duffle.

He got his chance when the team was taking a water break during practice. Sugawara leaned on his hands behind him as he sat on the sidelines to rest, and Hinata, determined, plopped down beside him. Sugawara wiped his brow as Hinata fiddled with the top of his water bottle.

“Um, senpai?” he asked lowly, and Sugawara turned to look at him with a smile. The smile straightened out when he saw how nervous Hinata must have looked.

“Everything alright, Hinata?” he asked, slipping into vice captain mode.

“Yes, er, that is I’m fine. But I wanted to ask you a question,” Hinata said, eyes darting to the polished gym floor and back up to the kind face of his teammate.

“Okay,” Sugawara said and nodded for him to continue.

Hinata continued to pull and pop the mouthpiece of his bottle. He dropped his voice into a whisper.

“I wanted to ask you about kissing,” Hinata said and felt his cheeks burst into flaming heat. He barely held back his cringe as the words left his mouth.

A glance at his senpai showed the gray haired man staring dumbstruck at him. He’d clearly not expected that topic.

Hinata forced himself to continue.

“I, um, I was wondering how you know if you want to kiss someone,” he said, and Sugawara cleared his throat before he whispered back faintly.

“Hinata… do you have someone you want to kiss?”

Hinata did outwardly cringe then, and he felt his blush spread like wildfire down his neck.

“No!” he whispered quickly. “I don’t. I don’t know anyone I want to kiss. Is that… Is that normal? To not feel that way?”

He glanced up to his older teammate, his brow pinched with worry, and he was relieved when Sugawara’s expression relaxed into a soft smile. Sugawara sighed, and it turned into a chuckle.

“Totally normal,” Sugawara said, and Hinata’s eyes widened with surprise. Hope inflated his chest. He wasn’t weird then.

“It is?!” he asked, his fingers stilling on his bottle.

“Yes,” Sugawara said and pushed to sit up fully. “You don’t have to want to kiss anyone. Not now or any other time.”

“Really?” Hinata asked, and Sugawara laughed again and reached out to ruffle Hinata’s sweaty hair.

“Hmm. Plenty of people don’t want to kiss unless they are with someone they have romantic feelings for. And other people don’t like to kiss at all and are happy without it.”

Relief flooded him at his senpai's words, but he bit his lip, still needing a little more assurance after a long week of worrying.

“Is that how you are, senpai? Have you only kissed when you loved someone?” he asked, and he watched as two bright pink spots bloomed high on Sugawara’s cheeks.

He cleared his throat again.

“Well, I’ve actually kissed both ways. My first kiss was with someone I didn’t care about in that way. It was okay, I supposed, but it didn’t feel like I thought it would. But when my boyfriend and I, erm, kissed it was a lot better. Because he is important to me.”

“That makes sense,” Hinata said, nodding.

“Anyway,” Sugawara said, his tone taking on a breezier tone as he rubbed at his cheek absently. “I wouldn’t worry about it. You have plenty of time to kiss later in life.”

Hinata nodded, smiling now.

“You’re right,” he said and bowed his head. “Thank you, senpai. I’m glad I talked to you.”

“You’re welcome,” Sugawara said. “And you can ask me stuff if something like that is bothering you again. Okay?”

Hinata thanked him again, and then Daichi was clapping his hands to get their attention that the break was over. Hinata jumped even higher the second half of practice, feeling lighter than he had in days.

_______

The next confession Kageyama got happened on the way to lunch the following week, and Hinata was there this time when the girl, one he recognized but didn’t know, stammered out Kageyama’s name and asked if she could talk to him privately for a moment. Hinata had stared as Kageyama, expression awkward, agreed and followed her, calling to Hinata that he’d meet him at their usual lunch spot later. He watched Kageyama walk with the girl, her long hair hanging down her back in a braid.

Hinata would have laughed at Kageyama’s predicament if he didn’t feel bad for the girl. She didn’t know Kageyama was gay, and she was about to get rejected. That had to suck, even if it wasn’t her fault. He plopped down on the grass under the tree they normally ate under when the weather was nice enough and opened his bento, looking around but not seeing Kageyama or the girl in sight.

When Kageayama returned, Hinata noticed the corner of an envelope sticking out of his pocket. He dropped down with a furrowed brow and crossed his long legs.

“She gave you a love letter?” Hinata asked, and Kageyama glared at him as he pulled out his chopsticks.

“Yes,” he grumbled out and looked down at his lunch. “I didn’t want to take it, but she insisted.”

Hinata cocked his head, his eyes trailing back down to the paper now crumpling against Kageyama’s bent legs.

“Are you going to read it?” Hinata asked, curiosity sparking. He’d never received a love letter or written one. He had no idea what one would say in one.

“I don’t know,” Kageyama shrugged. “It seems wrong not to.”

Hinata tapped his own chopsticks against the rim of his bento box.

“Can I read it?” he asked after a beat, and Kageyama’s head snapped up. An angry scowl twisted his lips as his face reddened.

“What!? No way, boke,” he spat. “It’s private.”

Hinata shrugged.

“But you don’t like her back,” he said, and Kageyama’s eyes darted around them before he whispered back harshly.

“That doesn’t matter,” he said. “How would you feel having a stranger reading a letter you wrote?”

Hinata bit his lip, imagining himself trying to confess to someone and someone overhearing. Or someone knowing he had been imagining kissing random people lately. He flushed.

“Okay, yeah, that makes sense,” he said, slumping farther down over his lunch in his lap. “That would suck.”

“Idiot,” Kageyama grunted in return now that Hinata looked chastened, and they focused on eating.

Later, when they were walking back to put away their empty bentos, Hinata did have one more comment to make.

“I do wish she would have given you cookies, too,” he groaned, still having plenty of room in his stomach for something sweet. Kageyama only grunted in response, so Hinata decided to push his luck. He glanced slyly at Kageyama, smirking, and said, tone all feigned innocence. “She must not have liked you as much as the other girl.”

He yelped as Kageyama immediately shoved him against the lockers, his shoulder banging loudly with the metal door.

At afternoon practice, Hinata miscalculated his jump by a couple of seconds and his fingertips barely were able to brush against the ball Kageyama had sent his way. Kageyama snapped at him as soon as the ball fell with a dull thud on the other side of the court. Hinata couldn’t even pretend it was an intentional dump.

“Pay attention, moron, or I’m not tossing to you again,” he growled, and Hinata squawked with indignation, even though he knew Kageyama was right to call him out.

“GAH! Shut up, Crappy-yama,” Hinata retorted, pointing at him “I’ll hit the next one. Just watch!”

Kageyama wasn’t phased by his insult or promise.

“You better,” was all he said and sent Hinata a final glare before turning to face the net, giving him his back.

“I can’t believe a guy with such a mean face got another stupid confession,” Hinata grumbled and rotated to the back of the line up.

Tanaka laughed, having been in earshot, and cracked a joke to Kageyama about being a ladies’ man, earning Hinata another sour scowl his way. Daichi called for them to focus, forcing Kageyama to turn around again, but as Sugawara talked Eno through a new serve he’d been practicing, Yamaguchi softly spoke up beside Hinata.

“It’s not really all that surprising he’s getting confessions. I’ve overheard several girls talk about how handsome they think Kageyama is. And one time, a girl said he’s mysterious. I’m guessing because he’s so quiet.”

Hinata’s mouth gaped in surprise, but Yamaguchi only shrugged. Hinata closed his mouth in a tight line and rolled his eyes.

“Ridiculous,” he muttered. “There’s no mystery to him. All he’s thinking about is volleyball, jeez!”

Tsuki snorted from his spot at the end.

“Dirt in the eyes laughing at dirt in the nose, it seems,” he taunted, and Hinata felt his face flush with anger, but he had to hold back his yell as Tanaka called out, “Nice serve!” Then all of Hinata’s attention had to snap to the ball hurtling in the air toward their side of the net.

That night in his bed, Hinata’s mind was running over his day like normal, needing to slow down enough for him to sleep. His thoughts turned to Yamaguchi’s statement of their classmates finding Kageyama handsome. He huffed into his pillow.

What was so handsome about the jerk? He’d lectured Hinata on the way home, and Hinata had gripped his handlebars until his knuckles turned white.

It’s probably just because he’s tall, he thought unkindly. Girls and volleyball teams liked tall guys. Hinata had to fight five times as hard for acknowledgment on the court because he was short.

But then Hinata felt a pang of guilt. Kageyama had never dismissed Hinata’s playing due to height. The dark haired boy’s face swam to the front of Hinata’s mind.

Hinata squeezed his eyes shut, pressing his forehead further in the pillow and analyzed his features and thought of different expressions. Tobio’s default frown transformed in Hinata’s mind to the bored look he had during class and then to the determined expression he got during matches. Then suddenly his face radiated victory, his blazing eyes meeting Hinata’s when they pulled off their freak quick. Those eyes pinned him in place, and a begrudging smile tugged at the corner of his lips. It did feel awesome playing with Kageyama. He really was an amazing setter.

And okay, maybe he could admit Kageyama’s eyes might be handsome. Their deep blue color stood out, framed by thick black lashes, not like Hinata’s pale, ginger ones. Oh yeah, and his hair was normal enough, Hinata guessed, though his bangs often stuck to his sweaty forehead when they practiced.

His nose was straight, and all his features were proportionate. An image Hinata knew well appeared before him then: Kageyama with his arms bent, brow furrowed in concentration as the ball came in contact with hands before shooting up and arching away.

Hinata groaned as he realized that he’d be lying if he said Kageyama didn’t have nice hands. He took extremely good care of them as a setter, filing and moisturizing them regularly. He had thin long fingers, perfect for palming the volleyball, and unfortunately, Hinata’s head, as well.

He pouted as he relived Kageyama tugging the curls from his scalp during an argument, but before Hinata really registered his train of thought, the scene in his mind changed. Kageyama was still tugging on his hair, but gentler, tugging him forward, that victorious spark in his eyes, holding Hinata’s gaze and then he was leaning down, angling his face. His lips were then on Hinata’s, pressing firmly, moving against his, and Hinata felt heat rush through him, pooling in his cheeks and his chest, his stomach fluttering like it did when he rode fast downhill on the way to school.

“What the hell!” Hinata yelped and flung himself out of his thoughts and onto his back, covers tangled around his torso.

He’d just thought of kissing Kageyama! Meany-face Kageayama! Was he crazy?! He’d taken thinking about kissing way too far!

Shame filled him then, thinking of his friend in such a way, but then the full weight of what had happened fell on him.

Oh god. He’d not only thought of kissing him, but he’d felt something while thinking it. Hinata stared wide eyed at his ceiling, his hand over his chest, feeling his heart still beating hard. Hinata had liked it.

________

For the first time ever, Hinata was happy that the team didn’t have a morning practice scheduled today. It delayed when he’d have to see Kageyama a little longer, and Hinata wasn’t sure how he was going to react when he saw him next. They wouldn’t share a class until after lunch, but Hinata would have to get through lunch with him first. He couldn’t help but fidget for the first half of the day, internally panicking as the clock ticked away. He tapped his pen against his notebook until the girl in front of him turned around to stare at him and then his hand pointedly, annoyance in her expression. He gave her a sheepish apology and switched to bouncing his knee for the rest of class.

Just don’t look at his face, Hinata told himself, now dragging himself from his desk, when before he’d been a ball of nervous energy. Just focus on your food. He won’t notice you being weird.

That worked for about a minute as he walked straight into a lean but firm chest as he turned out of the doorway, his bento nearly falling from his grasp. His breath left him with a muffled “Oof.”

“Look where you’re going, slowpoke,” Kageayama’s deep voice said above him as Hinata instinctively looked up to apologize.

Normally, Hinata would have chastized him for being a rude jerk, but his voice caught in his throat as his traitorous eyes zeroed in on Kageyama’s mouth. He felt his ears and neck erupt in heat, knowing his cheeks were probably splotchy as well.

Kageyama tilted his head to the side, looking down at him, and Hinata nearly choked at how similar it looked to how he’d angled to kiss him in his day–or he guessed–night time dreaming. The memory of the following kiss flashed in his mind, making his whole face burn more.

“You ready to eat?” he asked, studying his uncharacteristically quiet friend.

Hinata jerked his head down and mumbled out a “yeah” before turning to lead them out the double doors to the open lawn. He was so aware of Kageyama’s presence behind him, and he clutched his bento tighter.

As soon as he was seated, he kept his head down on his homemade lunch, shoving food in his mouth so he wouldn’t say anything weird. Oh god, was he being weird?

“Did you skip breakfast this morning? I’ve told you to eat more protein in the morning. It keeps your energy up.”

Hinata made some affirming grunts through his mouth full of rice, looking up in the vague direction of Kageyama’s shoulder. He didn’t dare look higher.

He heard Kageyama sigh and then the sound of rustling, like he was rummaging in his bag.

“Here,” he said curtly, and Hinata was forced to look up to see what he was offering. Kageyama stared at him with a furrowed brow, one hand holding a protein jelly pouch out to him. The other hand held a carton of milk with a straw that Kageyama’s lips were molded around, sucking at his milk. Those blue eyes were studying him.

Stop looking at his mouth! He shouted at himself in his head, and moved to take the jelly from him while breaking eye contact.

“Er, thanks,” Hinata said quickly, and he heard Kageyama grunt in acknowledgement.

“Just make sure to eat it before practice. And eat a decent breakfast from now on, dummy.”

Hinata nodded his head absently, his chopsticks remaining still in his hand for a moment more. His stomach was fluttering so much, he no longer felt like eating, but under Kageyama’s watchful eyes, if he didn’t eat, Kageyama would probably yell at him. Sighing, he continued to eat with the same forced gusto. He hoped his stomach wouldn’t act up like before games. He didn’t want to keep asking for a bathroom pass when Kageyama was in the same class and would think he was sick.

As much as faking sick would help him get out of practice, Hinata couldn’t bring himself to do it. Volleyball was too important. He’d have to suck it up. Maybe this was just a passing thing, and tomorrow, he’d be able to look at Kageyama and laugh at himself.

At least in class, Kageyama sat closer to the front, so Hinata could stare at the back of his head in intervals and pretend to be looking at the board without him any the wiser. Of course, that meant that now Hinata was free to notice other things he’d never appreciated quite like he was now.

The strength in the lines of his shoulders, the way the side of his straight dark hair parted at his nape. His long legs bent under the desk. He wanted to groan because dammit, actually Kageyama was attractive. Hinata had always admired him, physically, as an athlete. He was built exactly as an example volleyball player. But they weren’t on the court right now. He was just in his white button down, the black jacket hung neatly at the back of the classroom with the rest of the boys’.

Had he always felt like this and was just too oblivious to realize? No, Hinata thought, their personalities clashed at first. He’d only seen a rival then. So what had changed? Hormones? Their partnership on the team developing into friendship?

But Hinata had lots of friends, and he didn’t get flustered at the thought of kissing them, did he? Oh no! Now he had to double check.

As the teacher droned on about some historical event, Hinata sat up from where his chin had been perched on his hand and took a fortifying deep breath. He first pictured his childhood friends, Koji and Izumi, and his nose instantly wrinkled in equal parts disgust and relief as he most definitely didn’t feel anything for them. Thank the gods, cause that would be even more awkward.

Hesitantly, he pictured some of his new friends on the Karasuno team and could not suppress a soft snort as he pictured Tanaka kissing him, all bravado and loud cheering after.

The teacher gave him a look, as did several classmates, including Kageyama. He apologized and gave some lame excuse about his nose tickling. Kageyama raised an eyebrow at him but turned around as the teacher continued speaking. Tsukishima, Hinata cringed immediately, he didn’t even have to imagine. Nor would he really call him a friend. And Yamaguchi, though he liked much more than Tsukishima, inspired nothing. He thought of Asahi, who was the ace of the team and probably the mostly manly and objectively good looking guy on the team. But he only felt embarrassment and guilt, knowing how red Asahi’s face would get if he could see Hinata’s thoughts now.

He sighed, relieved. He didn’t feel like he needed to subject himself or the rest of his imagined teammates to kissing scenes. For good measure and comparison, he glanced at the back of Kageyama’s head and imagined kissing him again. Those lips pouted for a different reason in his mind, and as the imaginary Kageyama drew closer, Hinata felt his pulse pick up and heat rising up his neck. He quickly cut off the thought before the kiss was fully daydreamed.

Well, that answered it then. He definitely probably maybe wanted to kiss his best friend. His admittedly gay best friend.

Hinata had no idea if this made him gay now, but he needed to deal with one crisis at a time. First, let’s just get through the day.

Thankfully, practice wasn’t as bad as he’d feared. Once they started receiving drills, his sole concentration was on volleyball, like always. The only major trip up was during a water break when Hinata turned and caught sight of Kageyama taking a long drink from his water bottle, his lips wrapped around the mouth piece, his throat working as he swallowed. His bangs were plastered messily to his forehead and Hinata nearly jolted with the sudden urge to brush them back.

Asahi stood beside Kageyama, commenting about something Kageayama had done moments ago. When Nishinoya slapped a hand on Hinata’s shoulder to compliment him on his last receive, Hinata nearly jumped as high as he did for a spike. At least it got him out of his stupor.

“Didn’t mean to scare you,” Nishinoya chuckled, a friendly smile on his face. “Are you alright, Hina….?”

He trailed off, staring past Hinata, and when Hinata glanced to the side, he saw that Asahi had paused in his talking to wipe his sweaty face with his shirt. The lifted shirt revealed tanned abs and a dark line of hair, his biceps bulging as he twisted his shirt up more. Kageyama glanced at him then, and Hinata, wheeled back around.

He definitely didn’t want to develop any feelings about another teammate or be caught out by Kageyama. Either way, he didn't need to blatantly stare at his upperclassman, but when he faced Nishinoya again, the libero had a dazed, blank look on his face, not looking at Hinata whatsoever.

Hinata double checked his line of vision, and he felt his cheeks reddening as he realized that Nishinoya was definitely staring at Asahi’s stomach. Nishinoya’s lips were parted, and Hinata was pretty sure drool was starting to pool in one corner.

Oh, wow! It dawned on Hinata. Maybe he wasn’t the only one who was realizing things about himself on the team.

“Hey, Noya,” he said softly, trying to break the spell Asahi had apparently cast on the boy.

“Huh?” he answered, still staring off, and Hinata was about to call his name again, but Tanaka’s laugh boomed beside them.

Holy hell, people were sneaking up on him today! Tanaka threw a friendly arm around Nishinoya’s shoulder and shook him roughly.

“Aww, poor Noya. I’m super jealous of our ace’s muscles, too,” he crowed, cackling, and Hinata winced as he noticed Asahi look over, clearly overhearing. “Hey, we can work out together, try to get buff too.”

“What?!” Nishinoya said, face screwing up in confusion. Hinata watched as his brain visibly came back online.

“Oh! Yeah!” Nishinoya laughed a little too hard, his eyes focusing on Tanaka and Hinata. “We should definitely lift some more, dude.”

“Yeah, man!” Tanaka said, releasing Nishinoya and jumping into what Hinata assumed was a body builder pose. He flexed his arms, grunting with a laugh, and Nishinoya, now fully aware, mimicked him, taking turns doing ridiculous poses.

Hinata forced himself to chuckle at their antics, glad that Tanaka had given Nishinoya such a perfect excuse. As they assembled into groups for a three on three game, Hinata bit his lip as he watched Nishinoya on the other side of the net, exchanging a high five with Asahi. His expression still held the hero worship he normally reserved for their ace player, but Hinata now noticed the deeper pink in his cheeks.

He wanted to ask him about it but didn’t want to call attention to himself. Not until he figured out his own stuff with Kageyama.

He changed quicker than normal in the locker room afterwards. He didn’t want to notice his shoulders and back now without a shirt. He’d probably die of a heart attack with how fast his heart would beat. So instead, he waited awkwardly on the stairs for Kageyama to finish so they could walk home.

Darting home would have been weird, and Hinata didn’t want Kageyama to think he was mad at him, or well seriously mad.

“Hey,” Kageyama said, walking with his hands in his pockets to the bottom stair where Hinata sat. “You in a hurry?”

“Um, no,” Hinata said as tried to cover up his nerves with a shrug. “Not really.”

Kageyama stopped two steps above and looked down at him with a frown.

“What?” Hinata asked nervously when Kageyama kept looking at him without saying anything.

“You’re being weird,” he finally stated, and Hinata’s eyebrows shot up.

He immediately shot back, “Am not. You’re weird.”

“Tch,” Kageyama scoffed. “It wasn’t an insult. I only want to know what your deal is today. You’ve been out of it. Are you feeling sick?”

“I feel fine, GAH!” Hinata huffed out, standing up now and dusting the back of his pants. “Can we go now?” He moved to lead the way to the bike rack, but he felt Kageyama’s long fingers encircle his wrist and tug him softly to stop. His skin felt hot and oh so aware where Kageyama touched him.

“Hinata,” Kageyama’s voice was low behind him, and he released a little sigh and forced himself to turn around.

Kageyama’s eyebrows were scrunched in a worried expression, like when the teachers passed back test papers.

“Are you… are you mad… at me?” he stammered out. Hinata’s eyes widened and guilt flooded through him.

“No!” Hinata said quickly and turned fully to face Kageyama, not sure if he should be relieved that Kageyama let his hand drop. The circle of skin around his wrist tingled. “I’m not mad, okay? I’ve just…”

Hinata trailed off and tugged at a curb.

“Had stuff. On my mind. I probably just need to go to bed early or whatever,” he finished with the lame excuse, but Kageyama’s face no longer looked as pinched.

“Alright,” Kageyama said then, dropping it, and they finally started toward Hinata’s bike so they could walk home. Hinata babbled about anything he could think of from the day in an effort to appear more like normal. Kageyama nodded along, and when they parted ways, Hinata pedaled slowly up the mountain to his house. Alone in his room later, he rubbed at his wrist, trying to wrap his fingers in the exact way Kageyama had.

He sought out Sugawara again after practice. Kageyama had hung back, confused, until Suga saved Hinata by waving him off and saying that Hinata wanted to ask him for some guidance on an English assignment. Hinata had forced a cheerful wave with a “See ya!.”

When most of the team cleared out, leaving only Nishinoya to finish a few more sweeps with the dust broom, Suga had put his hands on his hips and given Hinata his full attention.

“What did you want to really talk about?” he said, giving Hinata a kind smile, and Hinata shifted from one foot to another, picking at the sleeve of his warm up jacket. He was trying to psych himself up to actually say it aloud. The vice captain waited patiently.

“Senpai,” he spoke up finally, squeezing his eyes shut. “How did you figure out you were gay?”

The broom handle fell with a clatter on the gym floor, and Nishinoya was staring at them both with round eyes.

“It’s not polite to eavesdrop,” Sugawara chastised the libero, his voice turning stern, and Nishnoya opened and closed his mouth while Hinata’s cheeks burned.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hear,” he finally squeaked out. Hinata let out a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding and covered his face with his hands.

“It’s okay,” he said, voice muffled. “He already heard. He migh as well join.”

Hinata peeked out over his fingertips. Honestly, Nishinoya probably needed some guidance, too, if Hinata had read his situation with Asahi correctly.

“If-if you don’t mind, I mean, Sugawara.”

Sugawara sighed, looking down at Hinata carefully.

“Are you sure?” he asked, and Hinata agreed before Sugawara instructed Nishinoya to pick up the broom and come over. He jogged over sheepishly to their huddle once he leaned the handle against the wall.

Hinata and Nishinoya looked up at him intently, and Sugawara looked away from them for a moment. He ruffled the back of his gray hair, staring across the gym, and pursed his lips to blow out air noisily.

“Right, okay,” Sugawara said in a determined voice and met their eyes. “Just go with my questions for a second.”

Hinata nodded seriously, and Nishinoya followed his example. Hinata felt nerves thrum through him about what Sugawara may ask, but he had asked his senpai something personal. It wouldn’t be fair if he wasn’t willing to answer some of Sugawara’s questions. And Sugawara had proved someone good to talk to.

“Hinata, did you ever play another sport before volleyball?” He asked.

“Uh, yeah, I used to play baseball, soccer and basketball in junior high,” Hinata answered, a bit thrown by a less invasive question than he expected.

Sugawara smiled slightly.

“Good. Now basketball and volleyball are different sports,” Sugawara said. “But they have some similarities. Both are defensive and use our hands and lateral movement.”

“And both are played on a court,” Nishinoya piped in, and Sugwara huffed a laugh.

“Right, right. Now, Hinata, which sport do you want to play?”

Hinata furrowed his eyebrows.

“Volleyball, of course,” Hinata answered. “Obviously.”

“And why?” Sugawara prompted with a raised eyebrow.

“B-because!” Hinata spluttered, moving his hands wildly. “Volleyball is so cool! When I go WHOOSH, and then jump up as high as I can, like POP, and then the set comes to me, like SLASH…”

Hinata dramatically slashed his arm at an angle.

“And then my hand is like SWOOSH and then hits the ball all WHACK!”

He mimed the spike, and Sugwara laughed in earnest, his beauty mark below his left eye crinkling as he did. He held both his hands out, gesturing for Hinata to calm down.

“So, it’s the feeling you get, yeah?” Sugawara said with a twinkle in his eyes. “You know you like volleyball over basketball?”

“Yes!” Hinata cheered happily.

“Well, I know I’m gay the same way,” Sugawara said. “It feels right to me.”

“Whoa!” Nishinoya said softly as Hinata’s mouth parted. He looked up at his senpai in awe. His explanation was perfect!

“That makes total sense!” Hinata cried loudly. “How are you so smart at explaining, Sugawara?”

Nishinoya nodded his head and crossed his arms solemnly.

“You should be a teacher, senpai,” the other boy declared. “I bet if you were my teacher, I would actually understand trigonometry.”

Sugwara’s cheeks pinked at their praise, and he looked like he was struggling not to smile wider.

“Er, thank you,” Sugawara said softly. “But back to the topic. Do you have any other questions, Hinata?”

“Nuh-uh,” Hinata said. “That was it.”

Sugawara held his gaze for a couple more beats, and he blinked at him.

“Are you certain?” he asked, studying him, and Hinata scrunched his lips up in thought.

He thought about what Sugawara said, about how Hinata would just feel it, like he did with volleyball. Then he thought about Kageyama, feeling himself blush under Sugawara’s eye as he did. But that’s where it got a bit confusing because Kageyama and volleyball were tied quite closely. And yeah, Hinata knew volleyball was just the metaphor… or allegory… or whatever his literature teacher would call it. But were his feelings of playing volleyball with Kageyama, of Kageyama being his setter and friend, influencing things?

But when Hinata let himself picture Kageyama’s quirked, weird smile of his and the way their shoulders sometimes brushed against each other when they walked and how he’d grabbed his wrist, Hinata knew that wasn’t true. His feelings were from Kageyama. They may be felt when they played together, too, but Hinata wanted those blue eyes fixed on him on and off the court.

“Erm, Hinata?” Sugawara asked, and Hinata tore himself away from his thoughts, knowing his face was red.

“No, senpai,” he said with conviction. “I think I get it now.”

Hinata may not know what exact label to put on his sexuality, but he knew for sure that he like liked Kageyama. He one hundred percent wanted to kiss him, mean face and all.

_______

As the days went by into next week, Hinata was slowly coming to terms with his crush on his best friend. He still got flustered around him a lot, but he was at least making eye contact more. And in the dark of his bedroom every night, he fell asleep thinking of different scenarios where they would kiss.

Maybe Hinata would make a really great spike at one of their games, most times it was the winning spike in his imagination, and Hinata would run over and jump into Kageyama’s arms. And Kageyama would get that look in his eye, the one that let Hinata know he’d done a good job. Hinata would be smiling and whooping, and then Kageyama would lean his head forward and kiss him in front of everyone. And the crowd would cheer even louder.

Or he’d envision them on a regular walk home, and Hinata would say something teasing. Kageyama would reach out like he was going to yank on his curls, like he did when he was extra annoyed, but instead, his long, setter fingers would run through his hair, softly, reverently. Hinata would look up, going still, waiting, and then Kageyama would cup the back of his head and push him forward as he leaned down. And their lips would be so warm and soft against each other’s.

Hinata and Kageyama were part of clean up duty after practice. Hinata was running stray balls down while Kageyama helped Yamaguchi pick up cones from drills earlier. Hinata heard Daichi walk over to thank them and the murmur of Kageyama speaking to him before he watched him give a short bow to their captain. When Hinata deposited the last of the balls in the cart, Kageyama approached him, brushing the bangs from his forehead.

“Oy. Daichi said we could practice sets as long as we don’t stay too long and lock up,” Kageyama stated. It was his way of asking Hinata if he wanted to, but Kageyama knew Hinata would never turn down getting more tosses his way. And Hinata stayed true to form, cheering in excitement and yelling out a thanks to the team captain as he was walking out with Sugawara. Daichi waved in acknowledgement.

Yamaguchi had already left for the locker room upstairs with Tsukishima, so Hinata helped Kageyama roll the ball cart over to one side of the net where Kageyama would be in position. The only awkwardness Hinata felt is when he accidentally bumped his shoulder against Kageyama as he walked around the cart. He muttered sorry while he hid his blush, looking at the gym floor as he walked to his starting position for a spike.

After that it was just the focus on muscles and movement, of breaths and the swoosh of the ball, the impact against his hand, the call for one more and one more and one more.

They’d stayed over for about forty-five minutes when Hinata looked at his phone, both taking a break, sprawled out on the polished court floor.

“I’m going to get something to drink. You want anything?” Hinata said, sitting up from the floor.

Kageyama lifted his head, still lying there, meeting Hinata’s gaze.

“Milk,” he said gruffly, and Hinata made a show of rolling his eyes. Of course.

“Yeah, yeah,” he mumbled and pushed himself to stand before going to retrieve his wallet from his bag left on the sideline.

He pushed on the metal double doors and trudged to the covered opening on the other side of the gym building where the vending machines were, debating which flavor of sports drink he was going to pick. His muscles felt warm from the additional practice, and the breeze on his face felt amazing as it ruffled through his hair, cooling the sweat. They’d both need to stretch again before locking up.

Following the walking path, he started to turn the corner into the breezeway but stopped when he heard voices.

Who would still be here this late? Curious, and a little wary, Hinata bit at his bottom lip and slowly shuffled to the edge of the opening. The vending machine against the wall he pressed to hummed as he peeked just past it. Eyes widening at the two people he saw, he ducked back against the cement wall unnoticed, back into the dark.

His heart pounded as he pressed his fingertips into the rough surface of the wall. The two had been Asahi and Nishinoya. Nishinoya had Asahi backed up against the opposite wall of the vending machine, one arm pressed against the wall beside him, leaning into his space, and panic had been written all over his face.

“Come on, Asahi. It’s just a kiss,” Nishinoya’s voice said.

Hinata’s lip tugged itself from his teeth’s grip as it popped open in his surprise. Was Noya so forward?

“N-now!?” Asahi’s voice stammered in alarm. “But you’ve only just told me. We haven’t even been on a date.”

Hinata heard Nishinoya laugh softly.

“Well then, will you go with me to the movies this weekend?” he asked.

“Oh, um. S-sure,” Asahi answered, and he sounded so flustered, Hinata could picture the blush he often wore when embarrassed. Even though Asahi towered over Nishinoya, the whole team knew how gentle their ace actually was.

“Then it’s settled. So, we can kiss now, right?” Nishinoya prompted, and Hinata could hear a choked noise that could only be Asahi reacting similarly to how Hinata was right now, his brain not fully processing what was happening. He felt guilty eavesdropping this far already, but his legs felt rooted to the spot. He didn't want them to or find him standing there, but he was frozen in fear of making a sound.

“But the date is this weekend?” Asahi said, his voice going up in a question, baffled.

“If we’re going out, does it matter if we wait until after or kiss now? Unless… you’ve changed your mind about accepting my feelings.”

“What?! No, I mean I haven’t changed my mind,” Asahi responded quickly, and then in a quieter tone. “I like you too.”

Hinata’s face burned.

“Do you want to kiss me?” Nishinoya said then, his voice dipping into a lower register. Hinata stared off at the class building across the wide path and cursed mentally. He’d never heard that tone of voice from his upperclassman before. It had sounded… hell, it had sounded seductive, and Hinata hoped he never heard it again. This whole conversation was supposed to be private. The air felt so tense around him.

“Yes,” finally came Asahi’s hoarse, soft reply, and the silence that followed had Hinata unconsciously holding his breath.

Oh god.

A squeak of a shoe was heard then, followed by a rush of a harsh exhale, but it was the soft moan followed by a wet sound that finally, finally triggered Hinata’s legs into a flight response, and he left as quietly and as quickly as he dared. His pulse thudded hard in his throat, and unbidden, all he could picture was Nishinoya pressed against Asahi, on his tiptoes, their mouths slotted together.

Oh god. Oh god.

He managed to pull himself to a stop at the doors before he did something stupid like flinging himself through them and alarming Kageyama. He absolutely did not want to talk about what he’d just witnessed. He forced himself to take slower, steadying breaths, bent over with his hands on his knees before the new fear of Kageyama, wondering what was taking him so long, came looking for him.

Straightening up, he willed himself to look as normal as possible, he hoped anyway, and turned the handle to go back in the gym.

Kageyama was sitting up now, scrolling on his phone, and he looked up when the door clicked as Hinata walked in.

His brow furrowed as he noticed Hinata’s empty hands.

“Where are the drinks?” he asked, and Hinata’s body gave a tiny jolt before he resumed his walk across the gym.

Clearing his throat to quickly think up an excuse, he said, “Oh, the machine must be busted. Nothing would come out when I pressed the buttons.”

Kageyama frowned further, and Hinata had the weirdest second of thought where he was sure Kageyama would jump up and point an accusing finger at him, somehow knowing what he’d overheard.

But his friend only muttered, “Weird. It was working earlier today.”

Hinata just shrugged in a helpless way and felt immense relief when Kageyama didn’t say any more on it while he dropped to a seat and started to stretch his now very tight legs. The adrenaline was wearing off now. Exhaustion rolled over him. It must have shown in his face, too, because Kageyama looked at him as he finished up stretches and said, “Let’s put away the cart and go.”

They were both quiet on their walk to the bike rack, and Hinata was thankful that they wouldn’t have to pass by the vending machines. He didn't know if Asahi and Nishinoya were still there, making out, or whatever. He wheeled his bike sleepily alongside Kageyama on their familiar route, and as they reached the circle of light cast from the streetlamp where they normally said goodbye, Kageyama reminded him to eat a good dinner before going to sleep.

In the past, Hinata may have perceived that reminder as Kageyama being bossy or nagging, but now, there was a fluttering in his chest as he recognized it as Kageyama showing he cared. The two boys waved and walked in opposite directions, Hinata hopping up to straddle his bike seat, and as he pedaled, he wondered if he’d ever have the guts to confess like Nishinoya.

_________

It was lunchtime on Friday, and Kageyama was nowhere to be found. He wasn’t hanging around in his last classroom. He wasn’t sitting outside in their normal spot. He even poked his head in the cafeteria, in case Kageyama had forgotten to bring his lunch or something, but no luck. Had he gone home sick? Hinata shot off a text asking where he was, since their break time was only so long, but he hadn’t responded yet.

“Could have told me, at least,” he muttered to himself. He would have sat with Yachi in the cafeteria. With a huff, he decided to double back near the outside entrance where the indoor vending machines were under a stairwell. He could be getting a drink, he reasoned. And if Kageyama wasn’t there, then Hinata would go back to their spot and eat his lunch, maybe take a power nap in the sun until break was over.

When he turned at the stairwell, he saw Kageyama standing with his back to the lit up machine. He almost called out how annoyed he was that he didn’t text him back, but at the last second, he realized Kageyama was talking to someone, and he had a strange expression on his face. He closed his mouth and slowly walked up. Maybe it was one of their teammates. Or a teacher was having a conversation with him.

He pulled back from sight and leaned against the rail at the first step, waiting for Kageyama to be done so they could go eat together. He pulled out his phone to pass the time. Surely it wouldn’t take too long.

“Kageyama-san,” a young man’s voice spoke out clearly then. “I like you.”

Stunned, Hinata’s hands loosened around his phone, and he thanked his volleyball reflexes that he caught it before it could tumble to the floor and awkwardly announce his presence.

It was another confession. Kageyama, once again, was getting a confession, and what’s worse, Hinata was now overhearing it. What the hell was up with people confessing at the vending machines?! Anyone could walk up, jeez!

“I like you,” the voice declared again. “I’ve liked you since the start of the school year, but I needed time to get the courage to say it. And… to figure out if you’d punch me for being a guy asking you out.”

It hit Hinata then that this confession had a key difference from the last two. A boy was confessing this time, and Kageyama liked boys, so a rejection was not a given this time. Kageyama could possibly want to date this boy. Someone who was not Hinata. His stomach dropped somewhere around his knees, and he had to grab onto the rail and grip it tight as a hot pit opened up in place of where his stomach had been.

He listened harder, now not caring that he was listening to another private conversation, not wanting to run from the scene this time. No, he wanted to stomp right around that corner and tell this guy to stop it, to shut up, that there was no way Kageyama would accept, but he couldn’t. He had no right. He wasn’t someone like that to Kageyama.

“Please, go on a date with me. We… we could go to a cafe or the arcade. Or anywhere you’d like.”

The voice was familiar to him. It itched at his brain, trying to place the face of whichever classmate it belonged to, but it had to be someone from their ear. It definitely didn’t sound like anyone from the team.

“I’m - I’m not sure,” he heard Kageyama say slowly, and that pit in Hinata’s stomach twisted with alarm and jealousy. That hadn’t been a no.

“All I ask is for one date. No pressure. We could get to know each other better, that’s all. Before you decide anything.”

Hinata’s grip on the rail was so tight, his fingers ached. And then his legs betrayed him then. They were forcing his feet to move, move away, down the hall, out the door, back outside. He was a coward. He hadn’t wanted to hear the answer, hear Kageyama agree.

He didn’t stop. He didn’t go back to his locker for his bento. He didn't go sit in his spot outside. Instead, he walked under the pavilion, following the sidewalk to another part of the school, a hot mist swimming in front of his eyes, as he entered back into the building and down a corridor where a bathroom he knew was rarely used. He’d found it during one of his times his stomach had cramped up before a big test. Now he slipped in and claimed one of the stalls, locking it and turning to slump against the door. He pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes, trying to relieve the pressure.

The pit was swallowing up the rest of his organs now, hollowing him out until all he felt was a swirling hollowness. Because what if Kageyama agreed. What if he went on that stupid date and had a great time? What if they went on more and became boyfriends? And then Hinata would have to be a good friend and act all happy. What if Kageyama kissed that boy?

His eyes were so hot now and he pressed harder, breathing through his mouth. He stayed that way, trying to block out everything with his hands against his eyes, until he felt his phone vibrate in his back pocket.

He slid it out and unlocked the screen to read a new text message.

Kageyama Tobio: Hey. Was busy. Coming to eat lunch now.

Hinata stared at the words, the hazy heat blurring his vision again the longer he did. He tried to blink it away as his phone buzzed again.

Kageyama Tobio: I’m here. Where are you?

Hinata’s fingers fumbled to turn his phone on complete silence then before clicking the screen to black. He shoved it back in his pocket and stared at the stall walls, at the toilet. He couldn’t face him. Not right now. It was going to take all of his energy to get it together for class.

As the warning bell rings, Hinata trudged out of the refuge of the stall and scrubbed at his face in the sink. His head feels full and his eyes achey, so he decides to go to the nurse’s office for some medicine.

He told her he thinks he got a sudden migraine, remembering them as something his mom gets every once in a while. The nurse gave him acetaminophen and told him to lay down on one of the cots with his eyes closed for twenty minutes, mentioning how it’s probably from the atmospheric pressure since it’s supposed to rain that night.

Hinata gladly laid face down on the cot, blocking out the light with the pillow, dozing so as not to think anymore.

She checked on him a little while later and wrote him a note for the teacher to excuse him for missing half of class.

Having bought all the time he could, he returned to his classroom and apologized for interrupting as he handed the teacher the note before taking his seat. He looks away when he catches Kageyama staring at him with a frown. He kept his head down to his text book for the rest of the day as much as he could.

During the short break between subjects, Kageyama came to stand by his desk.

“You went to the nurse. Are you sick?” he asked. “Why didn’t you answer my texts?”

Hinata forced a laugh but looked across the room at the white board instead of meeting his eyes.

“Sorry,” he said sheepishly. “Got a bad headache. The nurse said it’s probably the air pressure because of the rain later.”

He repeated her explanation gratefully, not ever wanting to explain the real reason.

Tobio grunted at that but seemed satisfied.

“As long as you’re sure you feel fit to practice,” he said, and Hinata assured him he did, smile in place though he was sure he looked like a tired mess.

As soon as Kageyama returned to his seat for class to resume, Hinata dropped his smile and hunched back over his desk, willing the day to end.

The afternoon was even worse as they were let out, and Hinata saw a familiar boy standing across the hall from their classroom. He watched the boy smile shyly when Kageyama walked out beside Hinata. His name was Ito Koji, from class B. He was usually quiet and had light brown hair, and he remembered Yachi saying he’d been paired with her for a class project once. She’d said he had neat handwriting and was nice.

Hinata’s rib cage felt like it clenched around his heart and lungs when Kageyama tilted his head in a small nod in the boy’s direction, causing the boy to smile more and look down, and Hinata felt the terrible urge to punch him in his stupid nice face.

“Let’s get to practice,” he said loudly, too loudly, and tugged on Kageyama’s sleeve toward the hallway. He didn’t want to see if Kageyama was wearing that awkward little smile of his.

Unfortunately, even in the locker room, he could not escape his feelings bubbling up as he tried to dress out without jerky movements to betray his agitation.

“Excuse me, guys. I have an announcement,” Nishinoya called to get the boys to all look at him standing there with Ashai in their practice clothes. He was practically vibrating on the spot.

“Or I guess we have an announcement,” he amended, as a goofy grin crossed his face. Asahi flushed beside him and looked at his shoes.

Daichi crossed his arms and said, “Alright, then. What’s up?”

“Asahi and I are boyfriends!” Nishinoya blurted, unable to contain himself, and Hinata was ashamed that the first feeling at the news inside him was ugly resentment. He didn’t want to feel that way, but his insides were already rubbed raw. It’s not like he hadn’t expected or hoped for this for them.

There was a stunned silence and then a whoop from Tanaka.

Asahi bowed, Nishinoya following, as he said in a soft tone, “Please accept us. It is still very new, and we promise to not let it interfere with the team.”

“Congratulations,” Yamaguchi said warmly from behind Hinata.

Daichi furrowed his brow in thought and then said, “As long as you keep your relationship separate from the team, you have my blessing as captain. But no PDA at practice or matches, got it?”

“Yes, captain!” They both said.

Daichi smiled then.

“Then, you have my congratulations.”

The rest of the team then felt more freedom to express their happiness for them. Tanaka quickly walked over to Nishinoya, still shirtless, and ruffled his hair roughly with his arm thrown around his neck.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were gay?!” Tanaka said laughing. “We’re best friends! You could tell me!”

Nishinoya laughed as they horsed around for a moment as he fought to get free of Tanaka’s hold.

“I didn’t really know. And I guess I still don’t. Like if I’m gay or bi,” Nishinoya said and then looked over at Asahi fondly. “But I do know that I want Asahi to be my boyfriend.”

Asahi’s cheeks erupted into a blush and Tanaka slapped him on the back, laughing.

“Well, if you’re going to date a guy, you can’t get much manlier than our ace!” he declared. “I’m happy for you both! We’ll have to double date sometime.”

“You’ll have to get a date first,” Eno teased from across the room, and everyone laughed. Hinata made himself join in.

As the room settled, Daichi called for everyone to be down on the court in the next five minutes. He patted Asahi on the shoulder as he left, and Sugawara went up to whisper something to Asahi, an encouraging smile on his face.

As Nishinoya opened the locker beside him to grab his towel and water bottle, Hinata swallowed hard and made himself say something to his friend, even if he wasn’t feeling as fully happy as he wanted to right then.

“Way to go, Noya,” he said softly. “Proud for you both.”

Nishinoya beamed at him so brightly with thanks, Hinata felt even worse that he’d immediately reacted with jealousy. His own answering smile, still not as wide as normal, felt more genuine than the first.

When Hinata found a spot on the gym floor to begin light stretches, Kageyama dropped beside him, long legs straight out in front of him.

“N-nice about Asahi and Noya dating,” he mumbled, and Hinata could not stop how off his voice sounded when he said, “Yeah, seems like everyone is dating. Who knows? You could have a boyfriend next.”

His laugh came out flat and strained as it choked him.

Kageyama turned to look at him surprised (More like caught out, Hinata grumbled to himself inside, because he didn’t know that Hinata had overheard). His teammate and friend had paused in pulling one leg inside, bent at an angle, his bangs spilling to the side. Hinata busied himself moving into the next stretch.

“You think so?” Kageyama asked lowly, expression smoothing out. “Do you think I should get a boyfriend?”

Hinata felt the pit open up wider inside him, and he snapped his head to face down and away from Kagyeama, afraid of what his expression was at that moment.

“That’s not what I said,” he answered. “I was just making a comment.”

“Hmm,” Kageyama said, sounding infuriatingly calm to Hinata. “But if I dated someone, what would you think about it?”

Why the hell was he asking him?! That was between him and Ito, wasn’t it? He dug his nails into the skin of his arm as he sat up to stretch it across his chest.

“Does it matter?” he said with an affected shrug. God, he didn’t want to have to see them date. He’d have to be a good friend and pretend to be happy for him. And Kageyama would probably want to eat lunch with Ito then and walk Ito home. He pictured it, the two walking side by side, hands kept hanging out to their sides until one of them plucked up the courage and slid their fingers together. A perfect setter hand against a hand that wrote perfect-looking kanji. Hinata could feel himself gritting his teeth.

“I asked,” Kagyeama said simply, like it was no big deal, and Hinata snapped.

“Then I think,” he said, finally meeting Kageyama’s eyes, voice turning cold. “That it would be a bad idea.”

He saw Kageyama’s eyebrows raise just a fraction.

“We’ve got volleyball and school,” Hinata continued, the pit eating his insides. “You don’t need someone distracting you. Unless you’re not serious about beating me on the world’s stage.”

Kageyama frowned.

“I am serious,” he defended.

“Then you have my answer,” Hinata snipped, and Kageyama released his arm stretch to push his hair away from his forehead, studying Hinata, who could not release the tension he felt pulling at his shoulders.

Thankfully, that’s when Coach Ukai blew the whistle for them to line up for laps.

After practice, Coach invited them all to come by his store for free meat buns to celebrate the end of the week. Tomorrow would be a recovery day, too. Everyone was excited in the locker room, fiercely debating about whether to get cheese curry or pork filled.

Hinata could not bring himself to join them.

When everyone had changed, and the gym had been cleaned and locked up, Hinata hung back from the group.

“Hey, where are you going, Hina? You aren’t coming with?” Tanaka said when he noticed Hinata breaking away to walk to his bike. Kageyama turned around at the mention of his name, his frown deepening.

“Oh, um, actually I promised my mom I’d come straight home today,” he lied, squirming as he felt Kageyama’s eyes on him. “So, I better not.”

“Aw! Next time for sure, then,” Nishinoya called while casually grabbing Asahi’s forearm, and they all chorused their goodbyes, waving Hinata off and going in the opposite direction to the store.

The bike home felt like it took double the time than normal, and when Hinata finished helping his mom load the dishes after dinner, he went upstairs and collapsed on his bed, forcing sleep to end this terrible day as quickly as possible.

_______

He woke up groggily Saturday morning to his mom gently rapping her knuckles on his door frame. He raised his head up from the pillow to see her standing in the doorway.

“Shoyo, honey?” she called, checking to see if he was coherent.

He ran a hand over his face and dug a knuckle in one eye.

“Yeah, I’m awake,” he said, yawning. “What’s up?”

She smiled at his bedraggled state fondly before speaking.

“I’m leaving soon to take Natsu to a classmate’s birthday party. Would you mind going into town and grabbing a few groceries while we’re gone?”

Shoyo pushed himself up more so he was propped on his side.

“Sure, Mom. No problem,” he said, earning another smile.

“Thanks. That would really help. I’ll leave the list and money on the counter for you.”

He reassured her he’d go as soon as he showered, and as Natsu’s voice cried out from the hall to ask when they were leaving, she gave him a warm goodbye and closed his door with a soft click.

He puffed out air noisily and fell back against the bed to stare at the ceiling. Maybe going to town would do him good, get him out of his head. He always felt better when he was moving, doing something, instead of hiding here in his room. At least, picking up groceries sounded better than watching Kageyama’s smile at Ito replay in his head.Scrubbing his face, he flung his legs over the bed and began getting ready.

As he pedaled down the mountain with his mom’s list in his pocket, he was glad to be outside. He hadn’t even dried his hair fully, and the wind through his damp curls felt soothing as he coasted, breathing in the fresh air and soaking in the sun on his arms and face.

Mom’s list was fairly short, so he wound his way around the aisles in the grocers quickly. He hung two plastic bags on either handlebar, balancing out the weight, and not wanting to hurry back, he took the long way home, biking through town.

He passed the main strip, the post office, a salon, the electronic store where he first saw the Little Giant and fell in love with volleyball. He turned down the next street, slowing down for passing cars at a crosswalk. He was about to push off when he happened to look to his right. It was the corner coffee shop, and there in the table by the window sat Kageyama across from none other than Ito.

Hinata froze, leaning with one foot on the ground, hands slack on the handlebars as he stared. Ito’s mouth was moving, talking to Kageyama, and Kageyama seemed to listen intently, leaning on his elbows, hands in front of him. He was wearing a dark blue sweater that matched his eyes and went well with his dark hair.

And the pit transformed, turning into a raging sea, the waves crashing against the walls of his stomach, angry foam crawling up his throat.

They were on a date. Kageyama had said yes.

Hinata barely processed that the salt water rising inside him was filling his eyes, and then in that horrible moment, Ito looked out the window and saw him, his mouth movements pausing. And Hinata had to watch as Ito seemed to move in slow motion, glancing back at Kageyama and nodding to the window. Kageyama’s too blue eyes met Hinata’s then, and he saw him frown and mouth his name, and Hinata was pretty sure he was going to be sick, brackish water churning in his gut.

The walk sign came on the light, catching his attention, and on pure muscle reflex, Hinata pushed off the ground and began biking to the other side of the street.

He only looked back when he heard his name shouted, and he turned to see Kageyama standing at the open cafe door, cupping his hands over his mouth, but Hinata could not stop.

Go back to your date, Kageyama, he urged frantically in his head. God, don’t see me like this.

“Hinata!” Kagyeama yelled again, but Hinata only pedaled faster, desperate to disappear.

He was able to make it to the park two streets down before his vision was too blurred to continue. He propped his bike against a tree, the bags jostling with his forceful movements, and then he turned and kicked a bench.

“Dammit,” he cursed under his breath, chest tight as he roughly wiped his eyes with his long sleeves. “So so stupid!”

He dropped into a squat, covering his head with his arms, groaning as his foot throbbed and his throat prickled with a fresh new wave of tears. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to calm his rapid breathing.

He was in love. He was in love with Kageyama, and it felt awful and terrifying and too, too much. He wished he’d never figured it out, never learned that Kageyama liked boys, that he, himself, also liked at least a boy. Because he was miserable. He wanted to go back to only caring about volleyball and what Mom was making for dinner and how he was going to pass in English.

He sucked up the snot stopping up his nose from crying and hung his head lower, letting the cool air hit his now exposed and too hot neck.

Once again, Kageyama and him were on opposite sides of a net. Once again, he was crying, but this time, he wasn’t sure how to catch up to Kageyama.

“Hey!” a deep voice from behind startled him out of his thoughts. They were breathing hard, like they’d been running. “Hinata-boke, why did you run when I called? Are you… are you alright?”

Hinata winced at the realization that Kageyama had followed him.

“I-I’m fine,” Hinata croaked out and pushed against his knees to stand up, but he didn’t turn around. He knew there was no way he could hide his tear stained face. “You should go back to your date with Ito. He'll be upset."

There were a couple of breaths of pause, only the sound of shoes shifting on the ground.

“How did you know about the date?” Kageyama asked then, and Hinata snorted. Right, Kageyama hadn’t told him. Well, that didn’t matter now.

“I heard him ask you at school,” he said and crossed his arms across his chest to hold it together.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Kageyama asked, and Hinata clenched his fists hard in the tuck of his elbows.

“Why didn’t you?” Hinata shot back. He knew it was unfair. He knew Kageyama was a more private person.

There came a sigh and then steps closer. Hinata’s back tensed.

“I guess I thought it didn’t matter,” Kageyama said, and a fresh spike of hurt felt like a stitch in Hinata’s ribs. “It’s not like there was going to be a second date.”

Head snapping up in surprise, Hinata could not help his instinctual turn to look over his shoulder at the boy.

“What?” Hinata squawked.

Kageyama was running a hand through his hair, looking off to the side.

“I only went to tell him I appreciated him asking, but I couldn’t return his feelings.”

Hinata didn’t even have time to process as Kagyeama’s gaze came back to him, and Hinata watched his visibly startle when he took in his face. He reached and stepped forward.

“Wait, have you been crying?” he asked, and Hinata flushed and turned away quickly.

“No,” he lied, scrubbing at his face again. “Something just flew in my eye while on my bike.”

A warm hand perched on his shoulder, gently turning him back around, and Hinata kept his head down.

“Were you… did my date make you upset?” Kageyama asked slowly after a moment, and panic gripped Hinata, making him feel caged.

“Why couldn’t you return his feelings?” he responded, his voice louder, heart thudding hard. It was a question meant to distract, to turn the tables, but Hinata still wanted to know now that his brain was sorting through Kageyama’s words.

He expected Kageyama to argue, to state that Hinata had to answer first. Their usual competitive dynamic made them predictable like that, and his thoughts were still stuttering on what to say when Kageyama spoke.

“Because I already have feelings for someone else,” Kageyama said, and his voice was even and low, but it still seemed to ring out around Hinata, echoing through the trees. The hope that he’d not yet lost Kageyama to someone else was extinguished before it could be fully felt.

“Oh,” Hinata said stupidly and then repeated it. “Oh.”

And as much as he wanted to know who was now the cause of his fresh misery, his self preservation instincts kicked in and wouldn’t let him form the words.

“That’s…”

It was all he could get out. He didn’t know how he meant to finish. That’s great? No, it was not.

“You aren’t going to ask who it is?” Kageyama asked, and Hinata was shaking his head.

“It’s not my business. I mean, if you want to tell…” Hinata stumbled in reply but trailed off as he noticed that Kagyeama’s hand was still on his shoulder. It squeezed down gently, and Hinata looked at it and slowly moved his eyes up to Kagyeama’s face above him.

His expression was so intense, the sun glinting off the black of his hair as that stare burrowed into Hinata.

“Ask me,” Kageyama said in his gruff voice, the one HInata loved to hear call out his name on the court.

“I-I don’t want…” Hinata began, his eyes feeling so wide and dry as he struggled to understand why Kageyama would demand such a thing.

“Why did you run off when you saw me at the coffee shop?” Kageyama asked, relentlessly. He was looking at Hinata with the same concentration he had when they were in a match, trying to predict the other team’s next move.

“God, Yama! why are you—” Hinata snapped with a frown, trying to cover up his fear. Kageyama’s hand still radiated heat from where it stayed in place. “--you’re asking dumb things!”

Kageyama’s fingers clamped down harder, and he towered over Hinata then.

“It’s you, idiot,” he snapped back, then closed his eyes, exhaling hard. His tone was softer when he said it again. “The p-person I have feelings for. It’s you, okay?”

Hinata forgot how to breathe. His lungs hung useless in his chest as he gaped at Kageyama. Had he misheard? Had he blacked out? Kageyama had said he liked him. Had left a date to run after him. Oh! his brain repeated, unhelpfully.

Kageyama shook him by his shoulder then.

“Oy! Say something,” he ordered, and Hinata sucked in a much needed breath.

“You too!” He exclaimed and then flushed as Kageyama stared at him. “Er… I mean, I have feelings for you, too.”

“Thank god,” Kageyama muttered, and then released his hold only to punch Hinata’s shoulder lightly. (Ow! Hinata said reflexively.) “I thought I got it wrong for a second.”

Hinata continued to blink bewilderedly at this turn of events.

“Why didn’t you say something sooner?!” Hinata blurted out, and Kageyama snorted.

“Yeah, that would have gone well. Telling my straight best friend I like him,” he said sarcastically and rolled his eyes. “You didn’t even know I was gay.”

Hinata bristled and flung his arms out as he talked.

“Well, sorry, I didn’t even know for myself.”

“Then why didn’t you say anything?” Kageyama shot back, and Hinata pointed an accusing finger at him.

“Because I thought you were going on a date with Ito!” he argued, and they both stared at each other heatedly before Hinata burst into relieved laughter and Kageyama turned his face in an attempt to hide his smile.

“We’re terrible at confessing,” Hinata groaned, giggles still slipping out.

“Tch, you are, you mean,” Kageyama said and reached out to ruffle Hinata’s already wind-tangled curls. Hinata grinned up underneath his arm, but it faltered as Kageyama’s hand slid to the back of his head and he stepped closer. Hinata’s sense of awareness of Kageyama increased a hundred times as those fingers moved against his scalp and he had to tilt his head up to keep eye contact. The scene was so familiar to him from his daydreams but felt brand new, all anticipation.

“Kageyama…,” Hinata said the boy’s name in a breathy way he’d never used before. He tracked the movement of those blue eyes as they roved from his gaze to his suddenly too dry lips. They stood like that for who knows how long before carefully, like he’d scare away Hinata or himself, he couldn’t tell, Kageyama leaned his face down.

Hinata could only think he should close his eyes even as he kept them open as Kageyama was closing the distance between them to mere centimeters. Fingers pressed into his nape to pull him forward and then—

A loud cheer erupted from near the other side of the trees, and both boys jerked their heads apart and looked around nervously.

In the gaps between the trees, blurs of color could be seen as teenagers ran around.

A voice shouted “Nice shoot, Fumiko!” Laughter followed, and Hinata remembered that they were in a public park.

“Maybe we should go somewhere else,” Hinata suggested sheepishly, and Kageyama nodded, his cheeks just as pink. Hinata moved to retrieve his bike, and when Kageyama asked about the bags, he explained why he’d come to town.

“I can help carry them,” Kageyama offered, and together, a bag in each of Kagyeama’s hands and one on each handlebar, they walked with Hianta’s bike toward the mountain.

“My mom took Natsu to a friend’s party,” he said to make conversation, glancing at Kageyama, shyness suddenly coursing through him. They’d almost kissed!

“T-that’s nice,” Kagyeama said.

‘Yeah.”

The silence dragged for a half a block after that, and Hinata fought against the urge to hum to fill it.

Kageyama cleared his throat a couple times.

“So…,” Kageyama asked, picking the conversation back up. “Will your mom and sister be... away for a while?”

Kageyama was looking straight ahead, but his blush was spreading down his neck.

Something dawned on Hinata then, and his ears grew hotter.

“Um, at-at least for a couple m-more hours, I think?” he said, wincing as it cracked a bit at the end. He forced a cough.

Kageyama nodded.

“Okay,” he said simply, and the pit that had been in Hinata’s gut earlier was now a fluttering warmth. He now very much wished they didn’t have the bags slowing them down. Wished they were already at his house, alone, instead of on the road, out in the open.

But it was okay, Hinata reasoned later, because the afternoon gave him plenty of material for kissing daydreams to last the rest of the semester, and by the start of the week, it was Kagyeama’s and his turn to announce to the team that they were now boyfriends.