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hold on and feel i belong

Summary:

Not today though.
Because today, Steve is knocked out of his chair and in an instant, someone’s straddling him and punching as hard as they can.
He doesn’t even see this person.
Because he can tell in a second who’s on top of him.
He could never purge the smell of his father’s cologne from his memory. Even if his father was there for one day, the house would smell like him for weeks.

Notes:

I'm SO sorry for how long it's been
I also (while trying to remember where the fuck I was) reread and realized I've contradicted myself in saying that Allen Munson is dead bc in the second fic he stabs Eddie so- shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
I also realized that I've completely forgotten about the fact that Steve is HoH, I am genuinely apologetic about forgetting, I'll try to do better moving forward. <3
Title from I'm Still Here by John Rzeznik (do I even have to say it anymore?)
Content Warnings for this behemoth:
References to Child Abuse (as well as religious trauma), Steve gets hate crimed (soz), Explicit Sexual Content (all in the tags- i think), Murder, then sex in front of the body- idk man, I think the tags are pretty thorough but I'm also sleep deprived so PLEASE lemme know if I missed an important tag or CW.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Steve laughs as he snips off an inch of hair, “Why can’t we just buy one?”

Eddie rolls his eyes fondly, “Because- I want our house to be one of a kind! That and having a playroom in the basement will keep anyone from hearing how loud you get.”

“Eddie!” Steve squawks as Robin and Chrissy laugh.

Ever since Eddie suggested the two women go out, they’ve been inseparable, Chrissy even has her own collar, something she and Steve make constant jokes about.

“No way he’s louder than Chris-”

“Birdie!” Chrissy squeaks out, “That’s like my brother!” 

Robin shrugs as she cuts Chrissy’s hair, “So? Steve is like mine, you don’t hear me whining.”

“I’m not whining-” Chrissy whines with a pout.

Robin cocks a brow, “Oh, you aren’t?”

Eddie snorts as Chrissy stiffens, eyes shifting away from the gooey flirting to make heart eyes at Steve through the mirror. Steve smiles at him before focusing back on his hair. Any and all conversation ends when Steve’s watch vibrates, they all turn and smile, “Morning, Wayne!” Steve grins, “Here for a cut?” He brandishes his scissors.

Wayne chuckles, “Ain’t got much to cut-” He grins, “But go for it, son.”

Eddie smiles, “You’ll have to wait your turn, ol’ geezer.” Wayne shakes his head, smiling fondly as Steve continues cutting Eddie’s hair. They all chat back and forth, Steve sees a side of Chrissy he hadn’t seen before- a kind of familiarity with Wayne that even Eddie doesn’t have.

Eddie catches him watching, mouthing a ‘later’ when Steve looks back at him in question.

Then Steve finishes Eddie’s hair and ushers Wayne over to his station. He takes stock of what he’s up against- very, very dry hair, “What shampoo do you use?”

Wayne shrugs, “Whatever’s cheapest.”

Steve physically recoils, “Oh- no-” He shakes his head, “No father in law of mine is gonna be using cheap shit. Come with me.” He forces Wayne to the shampoo station, missing the matching smiles Eddie and Wayne have, “I’ll give you the good stuff. For free. But you have to use it, alright?”

Wayne chuckles as he sits in the chair, “Fine, but I’m payin’ ya.” They don’t talk as Steve wets Wayne’s hair.

“Nope.” Steve answers easily, voice going more serious and quiet as he starts to work the shampoo through, “Can I ask how his dad died?”

Wayne side-eyes Eddie as he makes Chrissy laugh so hard Robin has to pull back her scissors. Wayne doesn’t answer at first, “Legally he’s only missing.” Steve’s hands stall, eyes wide, Wayne snorts as his hands resume, “But I say he’s dead because he’s been dead t’ me since he tried to kill m’ boy.” He pauses, “Again.”

Steve ponders this for a long moment, “Are you giving me plausible deniability?” He murmurs.

“I don’t know what you mean.” Wayne answers casually, “But you’d better drop it.” He smiles as Eddie comes up behind Steve.

“Whatchya two chattin’ about?” 

Wayne answers before Steve can come up with a lie, “I was tellin’ him how I think you two are good for each other.”

Steve’s cheeks heat, “And I was trying to come up with a flustered way to say thank you.” He glances back to Eddie with a small smile, one full of fondness, “And now I’m gonna tell him why cheap shampoo is a NO-NO.” He turns back to a laughing Wayne before he spends a solid ten minutes, even after they’ve gone through conditioner, even after they’re back at his station, talking just about good shampoos and conditioners.

Wayne- to his credit- stays engaged, asks questions about the shampoos he’s used throughout the years, listens as Steve explains why they blow, listens as Steve lists off the benefits of the shampoo and conditioner he’ll be sending Wayne home with.

It’s a sight that has Eddie feeling like he’s got it right.

Like every shitty decision he’s ever made- shaving his head the second his jaw had healed, tying a towel around his neck and trying to fly off the roof of his trailer (he wanted to be like Clark Kent, alright?), the resulting broken arm, taking in a cat covered in fleas that then spread to the other stray cats he’d already de-flead- 

It has him a little lost, staring at the woman he loves like a sister and her girlfriend, looks at the man he’s come to know and love as his dad, then moving his gaze to the man he’s gonna marry, the man he loves more than anything. The man who he loves more than anything- bike and fancy guitar included.

“Eds?” Steve waves his hand in front of his face, “You there, baby?”

Eddie smiles, “Yeah, sorry. Just thinkin’.”

“‘Bout what?” Wayne cocks a brow as Steve pulls out his razor.

Eddie shrugs, shakes his head, “Just sappy stuff.” 

Chrissy giggles, “Of course you’d be thinkin’ of sappy stuff- all your favorite people are here.”

“Nu-uh-” Steve hums out, “Dustin’s not here.”

“Or Gare-” Eddie adds, he laughs as Chrissy throws the cap of a hairspray bottle at him, “But yeah.” He concedes with a nod.

The group decide to go out to dinner that night- one where Eddie orders for Steve- Steve pointedly ignores how that makes his head a little foggy- then there’s the fight over who pays the check. Eddie glares Steve into submission, but Wayne and Chrissy are still putting up a decent fight.

Eventually Eddie concedes and leans back to watch the show with Steve and Robin (who very quickly went: this is not a fight I’ll win).

Eventually Wayne wins after using the whole ‘I’m basically your dad, I want to pay for your meals.’

“Can I ask about that actually?” Robin asks, voice a bit more nervous than usual.

Chrissy nods with a smile, “My parents kicked me out when I was sixteen.” She glances at Eddie, “Eds refused to let me just-” She trails off, hand in the air, like she can’t find the words.

“She tried real hard to live in her car.”

“Which h’r shit parents took.” Wayne tacks on.

Chrissy snorts, “Not my brightest idea- but Eddie brought me home and said I could take his room in the trailer.” She shakes her head with a fond smile, “It’s weird- that trailer was cramped with all three of us and only one bathroom, but it really helped me get out of that scary headspace my mom always put me in.”

Steve smiles at her, “I’m glad you found them.”

Chrissy nods, “I am too. I really came into my own in that trailer.” Robin nods her agreement, heart eyes glued to Chrissy with a proud smile as Chrissy looks back at her.

Nobody really says anything after that- they all focus on their food, exchanging light back and forth until they’re all stuffed full. Chrissy, Robin and Steve all have the tiniest bit of leftovers, Wayne hugs every single one of them with a promise of bringing Benny with him next time before he takes his leave.

Steve has gotten used to the walking around town for the things he needs. It’s mostly groceries since he works below his apartment. 

But he really tries to leave his little place at least twice a week- whether it’s just a jog or hanging out with whatever member of the party wants to hang out. Sometimes he just peruses the little shops around Eddie’s territory now that they’re out as a couple.

For the longest while- even under Eddie’s umbrella protection, people would treat Steve hostilly around the really bad part of town. But now that most of the town knows Steve is very firmly Eddie’s boy, people treat him like he’s an actual person.

He’s made friends with the barista from the coffee shop two streets away from his salon- the two trade free coffee for free haircuts.

Their name is Jade and every time he thinks about how they became friends, he laughs a little to himself.

It was only the second day they were officially out as a couple and Steve was in desperate need of a coffee he didn’t have to make himself. He takes the backroads to avoid the people who’ve missed the whispered ‘did you know steve and eddie…’ over the past couple days to finally try the cafe Eddie talks about.

And the person at the counter?

Is stunning. They’ve got half of their head buzzed, a fourth of it dyed black and the other quarter dyed forest green, all styled into a punk mullet- 

On top of their aesthetic, the cafe has such a calming energy, his tense shoulders go lax at the black walls covered in astrological decals, there’s the obvious smell of coffee, but there’s also a lot of those earthy spices that just feel like home to Steve. 

He steps up to the counter and before he can even ask about their flavors, Jade blurts out, “Nice day collar!”

Steve’s a bit flustered at that before he sees their day collar, and it’s like it was made to match the aesthetic of the cafe because a little crescent moon charm hangs on it, “They make CHARMS for day collars?” He squawks, “Oh, I need so many.”

Jade giggles, poking at the tablet used as a register, “What’s your poison?”

He thinks for a minute, “I just really need a shit ton of coffee and some fun spices?”

Jade’s eyes go wide, “Creative freedom?” Steve nods, “Oh, fuck yes.” They scurry to the espresso machine, pressing the coffee grounds down and slotting it into the machine before turning to their spices and fruit syrups.

It’s very clear they’re putting a lot of thought into what to put in Steve’s drink as they root around their syrups. At this point there’s an armful of spices and different chocolate syrups they mix together with some creamy substance Steve doesn’t even see them grab.

It’s hypnotizing- watching them work, he doesn’t even realize his drink is ready until Jade is holding it out to him, “I’m Jade. By the way.” They add with an awkward smile.

Steve smiles back, “Steve!” He waves with his free hand before he’s tasting his drink. His shoulders slump even more, his whole face relaxes- it’s like he’s got a brand new body- no chronic pain or fatigue to be found, “Oh, shit-” He grins.

“Good?” Jade hesitantly smiles, turns the little tablet to Steve so he can pay.

“Amazing-” Steve pulls out his wallet, paying with his card before grabbing a good chunk of cash and dropping it into the tip jar, “Honestly the best coffee I’ve had in- forever?”

Jade laughs so hard they snort, “Thanks for that! Gonna hang that on my wall-” They mime a frame behind them, “Steve said it was the best.”

Steve laughs, “I can see why Eddie has been buggin’ me to get over here.” He takes another sip of his coffee, missing how Jade’s eyes widen.

“Oh- you’re Steve Steve.”

“Yeah..?” Steve cocks his head to the side, “What?”

Jade smiles wide, “I’ve heard maybe a little too much about you from Munson.”

Steve’s smile goes awkward, “Sorry about that.”

Jade laughs, waves it off with a, “No biggie- he’s very in love with you by the way.”

Steve flushes, “I’d hope so- getting married should have love involved-” He laughs a little nervously.

“Married?!” 

“Mornin’ Jade!” Steve smiles, sits at one of the barstools by the counter.

“Mornin’ hun!” They call out, already working on some new concoction for Steve to try, “How’d the meet with Wayne go?”

Steve smiles, “Really good.” 

Jade glances back with a smile, “Good! I told you it would! I know you were nervous-” The rest of their response is cut short by the bell above the door chimes, “G’morning!” Jade calls out.

Steve doesn’t really focus on the incoming customer, most people just mutter out hi’s before going to the default: ignore.

Not today though.

Because today, Steve is knocked out of his chair and in an instant, someone’s straddling him and punching as hard as they can.

He doesn’t even see this person.

Because he can tell in a second who’s on top of him.

He could never purge the smell of his father’s cologne from his memory. Even if his father was there for one day, the house would smell like him for weeks.

He can barely make out what his father is shouting, though he can probably guess since his dad always had his favorite slurs to use- his hearing aid has been knocked out and flung somewhere into Jade’s cafe and after his other ear is hit with an open hand, all he can hear is static.

He tries to block his face- even throws out a punch or two, but once he feels his nose break, things go a bit fuzzy.

He remembers Jade jumping over the counter with a pot of hot coffee-

Remembers the muffled sound of Robert Harrington shrieking at the top of his lungs-

Remembers the small, ringed hands looking him over for any other serious injuries.

Remembers how his good ear rings. The cafe starts to spin before he’s falling limp in Jade’s arms.

Then he’s sat behind the coffee bar, broken hearing aid in hand, eyes closed to try and ease the oncoming migraine. His eyes snap open at bigger ringed hands wrapping around his biceps, “Eds?”

He can see Eddie’s lips moving, but all he can hear is an almost unrecognizable muffle through the ringing- so high pitched at this point it takes everything in him to not just throw up. He can make out the words ‘you ok’ in the form of a question.

Steve nods dumbly, “He broke Stanly.” He holds his hearing aid out, he should probably talk to a doctor about the other ear that doesn’t seem to be working now.

Eddie takes it with a wet chuckle, his words more muffled over the white noise at this point. He watches as Eddie’s head turns, he says something to Jade as he holds Steve’s hearing aid, Stanly, out. He can barely make out Jade’s laugh.

Steve blinks a few times, he tries to whisper, but he’s not quite sure the volume he’s speaking at- it feels too loud, “Wanna go home, daddy-”

If Eddie’s face is any indication, Jade didn’t hear anything. Silver linings, Steve supposes.

Eddie pulls Steve up, tucks Stanly into his pocket before Steve’s trying to pull away to walk by himself. Eddie won’t loosen his grip though, “Eds- Lemme walk.”

He can feel the subtle shift of Eddie sighing, the ringing starts to ease a bit, he can make an educated guess as to what Eddie’s saying, especially when he can make out the, “-leaning on me-”

‘You’re literally leaning on me, love’

He decides it’s better to keep to himself until they get home.

Eddie sets him up on the couch, holds out one of Jade’s magic croissants with the small move of his mouth, ‘Eat.’

So Steve focuses on what he can-

The buttery goodness in his hands.

He eats while watching Eddie pull out his phone, watches as Eddie shoots out a text, watches as he calls someone, sets the croissant aside when Eddie starts to become a bit more heated at whoever’s on the other side of the phone.

If he were in a better place right now, he’d be able to control the involuntary flinch when Eddie shouts loud enough Steve can make out one word, beaten. Eddie must see because his eyes start to water and he hangs the phone up without saying goodbye.

Eddie moves slowly after that, sits on the couch before pulling Steve into his arms with a soft kiss to the crown to his head, he can make out the fact that Eddie’s said some version of I’m sorry-

“Eds?” Eddie’s chest rumbles in response, “I can’t hear anything-” He murmurs, talking through Eddie’s very clear attempt at responding, “At all.”

Eddie leans into Steve for a second before he’s coming back with his phone.

Forever?

Steve shrugs, “Dunno?” He thinks for a second, “I think this one’s getting a little better?” He points to the improving ear.

That’s scary.

Steve nods, “Can you see if there are any openings for new hearing aids?”

Eddie takes a long while to type his response. Already done. Someone’s on the way.

He relaxes into Eddie with a tired, “Thanks.”

There’s a tap on his shoulder. What happened?

Another shrug, “My dad broke my nose? I dunno. Ask Jade, he knocked Stanly out pretty quick.”

Eddie takes way too long to type out a response. But the message is short. They heard all of it.

“Ok? Then what happened?”

Do you really wanna know, baby?

Steve pulls himself out of Eddie’s arms, eyebrows knit together in frustration, “Yes, Eddie. I would like to know why my asshole father just kicked my shit in on a random Thursday morning.”

Eddie makes a face of apology before he’s typing out a chunk of text.

Jade said he called you a stain on the Harrington name… Called you a few slurs and wished for- But Eddie didn’t finish typing it out.

“Wished for what?” Steve sighs tiredly.

He can definitely guess.

Eddie’s eyes are teary at this point as he types. He wished you had died when you moved here.

Steve passes Eddie’s phone back before laying back into Eddie, “Jade ok?”

He can hear the muffled sound of Eddie’s laugh. Yeah. They threw coffee on your dad to get him to fuck off.

“Lucky.” Steve snorts, “I’d pay real money to see the look on his face.”

It’s muffled, but Eddie’s voice can be heard as he chuckles out a, “Me too-”

Steve lets himself rest into Eddie, maybe sleep a little while they wait for the ear people to drop by and hold on-

“Why aren’t we going to the ear people?” Steve asks a little louder than he meant to.

Eddie chuckles, attempting to verbally answer, “... thought having them… easier than…”

“I got like- halfa that.” Steve waits for Eddie to type it out.

I pulled the scary biker card. I thought it’d be easier to have them come here than to get you to them.

Steve nods in understanding before he’s back to resting against Eddie.

He must fall asleep because his eyes shoot open when Eddie sits him up, he finds his usual ear doctor hovering behind Eddie as Eddie smiles at Steve, “Stevie-” Steve can’t bite back his smile at the (mostly unmuffled) sound of Eddie’s voice, “Doc’s here.”

It’s kind of a blur after that, he’s fitted for a new hearing aid with an appointment in two days to check on the other ear before the doctor’s gone and he’s back melted into Eddie.

The next few days, his hearing gets almost to where it was before, the other ear almost works, but not quite, so it’s fitted for a hearing aid. They’ve started to build their home, most of the builders are members of the gang, so there’s not much explanation needed for Eddie’s vision since most of them already know it.

Steve spends most of his time curled up with Eddie. Though not today.

Today he wakes up to an empty bed.

Normally he’d go about his morning, get some coffee, maybe a muffin before opening the salon but Robin insisted she cover the salon until his new hearing aid gets in, so instead he curls around Eddie’s pillow, smells the telltale smell of Eddie- gasoline mixed with leather and a faint citrus.

He falls asleep like that, only woken up by firm hands and a gentle smile in front of his eyes, “Eds?”

“Hey sweet boy.” Eddie smiles, leaning to the side to grab a repaired Stanly, he helps Steve sit up before he’s putting the hearing aid on for Steve, “G’morning, love.”

Steve smiles, closes his eyes and tilts his head up, immediately met with a gentle press of the lips, “Where’d you go?”

Eddie lets out a semi-tense breath, “Had an errand to run.”

“‘N I couldn’t come with?” Steve pouts a bit.

Sure, it’s a bit juvenile, but after everything life’s thrown at Steve the past few years, he thinks he’s allowed some attachment issues.

Eddie breathes out through his nose before smiling, “Well, it’s kinda half without you, because now you gotta come with me.”

Steve smiles tiredly before he’s opening his mouth to ask for Eddie to pick his outfit but before he can, his eyes fall to Eddie’s lap, where Steve’s favorite sweater is draped over Eddie’s knees, “You picked my clothes.”

“Yeah, angel.” Eddie stands as Steve sheds his pajamas, “I need you feelin’ comfy.”

The gentle hands helping Steve get ready for this mystery outing has Steve feeling all soft and pliant, “How come, daddy?”

Eddie smiles sweetly, “Baby, I need you level headed, ok? C’mon.”

Steve nods, focusing his energy on being an actual person, rather than just Eddie’s angel. He clears his throat, “Coffee might help that.” He murmurs, feeling a bit nervous at the headspace he’s found himself in as Eddie leads him around their apartment.

But Eddie’s the lighthouse in the dark, dingy storm, “Jade had a new mix for you to try.”

Steve smiles excitedly, pulling his hand free from Eddie’s to grab his cup. He smells it first, shoulders slumping a bit at the smell of cinnamon before he’s taking a sip. It’s like a lightswitch flipping, “Oh, they’ve really outdone themselves.” He holds the cup out for Eddie to try, smiling as Eddie takes a sip.

“Fuck, that’s good!” Eddie squawks, “Maybe I should start giving them free reign.”

Steve nods before he’s drinking more of his drink, going easily as Eddie starts to pull him to the couch. He sits, setting his coffee aside to slip on his shoes before grabbing his coffee again and following Eddie out of the apartment, waving Robin bye as they leave.

While surprises usually give him the heebie jeebies, Steve finds his muscles loosening as he finishes his coffee, depositing the empty cup in the trash before he’s getting on Eddie’s bike, uncaring as to where they’re going as Eddie starts driving. His head rests on Eddie’s shoulder as the wind blowing past them has him sighing happily.

When they stop and both get off the bike, Eddie holds Steve in place in front of him, “I found your dad.”

That is decidedly not what Steve thought Eddie was going to say. He swallows roughly, “Ok?”

“You have a choice to make here today.” Eddie’s eyes are set firm, a sight Steve has only seen when Eddie’s in Biker Boss Mode, “I can force him to leave Hawkins and never come back.”

Fat Chance. Robert Harrington doesn’t listen to anyone unless they’re blowing smoke up his ass.

“Or?”

He already knows the other option, they both know it. Eddie doesn’t give him too much grief for asking anyway, “Or we kill ‘im.” Steve stares blankly for a minute, “Nobody knows he’s here. ‘S just you and me, baby.” Eddie rubs Steve’s bicep with his thumb, “We can come back later- or I can handle this-”

“I don’t want him anywhere near me ever again.” Steve cuts Eddie off, “And he won’t listen if we tell him to never come back.” He digs into Eddie’s leather jacket’s pocket, pulling out the pocket knife that resides there before he’s pushing past Eddie.

Eddie rushes to be in front of Steve, quick to stop Steve from getting closer to the building, “Are you sure, sweets? You don’t have to do it yourself.”

Steve stops, grip around the knife tight as he actually thinks about it.

About the years of abuse.

The fights, the drinking, the preaching.

The casual transphobia he’d grown used to.

His eyes meet Eddie’s, his stomach flutters with a feeling that should not be present in the current circumstance, “I want to.”

Eddie’s eyes widen, “You’re sure?”

Steve nods, moving as Eddie’s arms drop their hold on him. Eddie backs him, reassures him by putting his hand on the small of Steve’s back as they enter this shady warehouse.

It’s empty, only the windows light the gray concrete of the warehouse. In the center, tied to a chair, is Robert Harrington.

The man who made Steve hate himself for daring to exist at all, whether it be with over-reactions to under-aged drinking or lost sports games he didn’t even bother attending. Anything Steve did growing up would be brought into question by his father and sure, his mother was complacent, floating in and out just because she could.

But he can still hear his father’s voice anytime he makes a mistake, hears the booming sound of insults thrown his way.

His eyes harden at the sight of the man who’d decided Steve could only live as Steve if he followed the complex conditions- Straight A’s, popular jock, dating the smartest girl in school while putting down the people who wanted a slice of the poisoned pie that came with being Steve Harrington.

His father’s panicked eyes settle on Steve and he starts screaming. Steve’s learned to tune out the vitriol his father spits. He knows that Robert has no variation when it comes to the things he’ll say to put Steve down. He’s heard all of them time and time again.

They hurt at one point in Steve’s upbringing, but now it’s just noise. Annoying noise. He pulls away from Eddie, closer to his father with a barked out, “Shut the fuck up.”

Robert’s eyes widen, “Excuse me?” He pulls at the rope cutting off circulation to his fingers, “I’m your father, you can’t speak to me this-”

“I will speak to you however I damn well please.” Steve pushes forward the very personality his father had forced him into while in school, “You should never have had a child if you weren’t prepared to take care of someone.” He shakes his head, “What a disappointment you are.” 

“You will not-”

“I’m speaking.” Steve cuts him off, eyes falling away from his father to look down at the knife in his hands, “Y’know, I thought this would be harder for me.” He opens the knife, thumb trailing along the sharp side of the knife before he’s putting the tiniest bit of pressure on the tip of the knife, “You used to terrify me-” He looks back to his father, finding fear in the eyes he’d never seen fear in before, “I used to stay up all night rattling off reasons I was a disappointment to you-” He shakes his head, “Oh, I’m not the manliest man- I don’t like girls- I hate sports- I like cutting hair and cleaning and baking-” He narrows his eyes at his father, “I just don’t care what you think anymore because ultimately?” He grips his father’s chin tightly to force eye contact, “You won’t be around to see how I disappoint you next.”

“What are you gonna do to me?”

Steve smiles, feels a bit weird at how naturally it comes to him in this context, “Wouldn’t you like to know?” He pushes his father’s head away before pulling back, “Do you know how long it took for me to feel comfortable in my own skin? There are still days where I can’t stand what I see in the mirror because of you.” He glances at Eddie, cheeks heating at how intensely Eddie is staring at him, he turns back to his father, “I will never. Ever. Make my kids feel that way.” Robert’s face scrunches up in disgust, “Yeah, you heard me right. I’m gonna have kids-” He points to Eddie, “With him. I’ve seen it.”

His father opens his mouth to say something, but Steve talks over him, “And you will never meet my daughter. You don’t even get the gift of knowing her name.” He snaps, “In fact, she won’t know you exist at all. She’ll think her grandfathers are Jim Hopper and Wayne Munson.”

His father shakes his head, “You disgust me.”

“You really wanna say that to the unhinged man with a knife ready to slice your throat open, old man?”

“You’re gonna kill me anyway, right? Might as well say what’s on my mind.” He snarls, eyes giving away just how afraid he actually is.

Steve points to Robert’s eyes with the tip of the blade, “That’s it. That’s what you used to make me feel every waking hour of every goddamn day. But now I see you for who you really are.” He stalks closer, “You’re just a scared, insecure little man who-” He chuckles meanly, “Even though you’re the richest asshole in this fucking town- still can’t spend the right amount of money on a comb over that looks even a little bit real.”

In a flash, he’s gripping his father’s comb over and ripping it up roughly, heart racing at his father’s scream. His father keels over, Steve’s eyes widen at the pressure pushing against the knife.

His father looks up with tears in his eyes, Steve’s eyes glance down at the knife now plunged into Robert Harrington’s heart Only a bit upset that it was a genuine accident. He lets go of the handle, steps back roughly as the chair tips over, blood pools under the chair, starts to roll towards Steve’s feet as he stares at the dead eyes of his father.

He should feel bad.

He turns abruptly towards Eddie.

Something finds a home in his gut as he pushes himself forward towards Eddie as Eddie’s eyes soften, “Stevie, you ok-” He cuts Eddie off with a rough kiss, arms thrown haphazardly around Eddie’s neck as Eddie’s arms throw themselves around Steve’s waist to stabilize him, “Wait-” Eddie gets out, but Steve doesn’t care.

It’s consuming him- this- this need for Eddie Munson, “No-” Steve breathes out, “Just fuck me.”

Eddie nips Steve’s bottom lip, “Who’s the boss here?”

“Today?” Steve hums out, gasping sharply as Eddie grasps his ass, “Me. And I want you to make me bleed.”

Eddie groans as the two of them slowly fall to the ground, hands pushing off clothes as fast as they can, “Can do that.”

Steve’s head drops back as Eddie kisses down his throat, “Thas a good boy.” He moans at the finger wrapped around his tdick.

Eddie nips his collar bone before kissing back up Steve’s neck, pressling sloppy kisses everywhere before his finger gathers up the slick and-

Wait.

Eddie pulls back, eyes wide when he looks down at his finger, “Baby are you bleeding?”

Steve glances down, “No?” He glances over to the body a few feet away, “He is.”

“Do you want me to-”

“No-” He looks back up to Eddie, “‘S just you and me, baby.” He echoes what Eddie had said before this whole ordeal, smiling at the rabid smile Eddie has plastered on his face. Steve yelps as Eddie’s slick and blood lubed finger breaches his tight rim.

Eddie clashes their lips together again, “Thought-” Another kiss, “That’s my line-” He gets out before pulling his finger free, “Tell me what you want.”

Steve shivers as the tip of Eddie’s cock teases his hole, “Want you daddy.” He whines out, “Make me hurt.”

“I’ve got you sweet boy-” Is all the warning Steve gets before Eddie’s pushing in completely, moaning over Steve’s blood curdling scream, Steve’s nails dig into Eddie’s back as they run down the length of Eddie’s spine, “Christ-”

Steve screams with every thrust, legs held tightly by Eddie’s hands as he thrusts with a desperation neither one of them has experienced before, Eddie licks away Steve’s tears, getting a weak moan in response before Steve’s clenching around him. The increased pressure has Eddie cumming faster than he’d care to admit.

Eddie slumps on top of Steve, softening cock still nestled in that tight space.

Steve feels a lightness he’d only felt in his vision of the future with Eddie. A light that has him sighing dazedly as his eyes flutter shut, content in breathing Eddie in despite the blood beneath them tangling into his hair.

He doesn’t know how much time passes like this, keeps his fingers tangled in Eddie’s locks until Eddie’s pulling out with a groan, “‘m gonna take car’a you now, baby boy.”

Steve shakes his head, “Mm-mm.”

“Baby?” Eddie furrows his brows, “You don’t wanna cum?”

Steve hums, “N’t yet.”

“When?” Eddie noses at Steve’s throat, peppering Steve’s neck in soft kisses.

Steve giggles, “Home. Wanna cum at home.”

Eddie nips Steve’s jaw, “Let’s go home then, wanna taste you.” He murmurs.

Steve stays in that soft place while Eddie redresses them, he misses how Eddie grimaces at the blood stuck to Steve’s back. 

Steve doesn’t remember the ride home very much, remembers that Eddie has him lean pretty heavily on him, remembers the very real pain with every bump in the road, remembers how good Eddie’s hands feel on him up the flight of stairs.

Totally misses Robin giggling at how fucked out he looks.

But he does float away at Eddie getting them in the shower, feels like his head is stuffed with cotton as Eddie washes away the evidence of the warehouse, gasps a bit in pain when Eddie pulls apart his ass cheeks to gently wipe away the blood there. Steve recognizes the soft sheets under him, recognizes the telltale tug on his leg hair from Eddie’s rings as Eddie throws Steve’s legs over his shoulders before he’s sucking Steve’s tdick into his mouth.

It brings Steve back to his body, or at least- that part of his body, “Oh fuck-” His head drops back into his pillow, little whines and whimpers falling from his lips as Eddie licks a stripe up before adding his fingers to the mix.

Steve’s fingers tangle into Eddie’s hair, voice high and thready as Eddie moans against his cunt, he turns his head, biting down onto Eddie’s pillow as he screams through his orgasm, drenching Eddie’s chin. But Eddie doesn’t stop there, his body wriggles up with Steve’s as Steve tries to scramble away from Eddie’s tongue.

“Ungh-” Steve’s eyes clench shut, “F-fuck-” His back arches, pushing his tdick further into Eddie’s mouth, “D-daddy-”  

Eddie only doubles down, slurping on Steve’s tdick while his fingers speed, he pulls his mouth away for half a second, voice rough as it comes out, “Cum for daddy again.” Before his mouth’s in place again.

Steve’s vision whites out as he cums again, it’s such an intense orgasm, he doesn’t come back to until he’s cuddled into Eddie’s arms, the older man humming to himself as he plays with Steve’s hair, Steve lets out a happy sigh, Eddie chuckles, “Back with me, baby?”

“Mhm.” He hums out, eyes still shut, head still blissfully empty.

“Not talkin’?” Eddie kisses the top of Steve’s head.

“Mm-mm.” Steve shakes his head tiredly.

Eddie smiles, “Came your brains out, huh?” Steve nods, “Let’s spend the rest of today in bed then.” He chuckles at Steve cuddling closer, “Should I be concerned at how quickly you went into subspace after-” He draws out, “Y’know?” Steve giggles, shakes his head no, “Are you okay?”

Steve sobers a bit at that, gives a hesitant nod followed by a little, “Mhm.”

“That didn’t seem sure, baby. Are you sure?” Another nod, “Steeeevie…”

Steve lets out a breath, voice coming out soft and nervous, “Do you want me to not be ok?”

Eddie chuckles tiredly, “No, baby. I want you to be ok, I just wanna make sure you’re not brushing this aside or bottling it up.”

Steve breathes Eddie in while forming a thoughtful answer while also grieving the soft place he’s leaving in talking about this, “My dad loomed over me my whole life.” He sighs, “There wasn’t a day I wasn’t afraid he’d come for me.” His fingers trace over his favorite of Eddie’s tattoos, “I always knew it’d come down to him or me.”                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  

Eddie sighs sadly, “It must be tiring to always be on guard like that.”

Steve feels the tears well up, “Yeah-” 

“Oh, baby-” Eddie breathes out, keeping his fingers moving through Steve’s hair. He lets the tears fall, a slow tearfall that’s barely noticeable. But Eddie notices, he doesn’t say anything for a long while, just holds Steve as he cries, “I’ve got you angel.”

Steve laughs through the tears, “I know.” He relaxes back into Eddie, voice quiet, “You always have me.” Eddie can feel the small smile against his chest, “I feel so safe with you.” He murmurs, “I love you so much.”

“I love you too.” Eddie murmurs back, “God, I’d do just about anything for you, my sweet love.”

Steve’s starts to laugh again, “Yeah, you goob- You offered to kill my dad for me.” 

Eddie joins in on the giggles, “I did didn’t I?” The two giggle for a little while before caving in and napping for a good chunk of the day.

“Are you sure about three spare rooms?” Steve cocks a brow.

Eddie nods, murmuring into Steve’s ear from behind him, “Yeah angel. The room closest to ours will become the nursery once you’re cookin’ her.”

Steve flushes, “But we don’t even know-”

“Just lemme have this, sweets.”

“Yessir.” Steve hums out, leaning back into Eddie’s arms as he watches the framework of their house start to look like an actual house. He pats Eddie’s hands, “C’mon. Break’s over.”

Eddie cocks a brow, “Oh, is it?”

“Mhm!” Steve smiles, pulling out of Eddie’s grip before standing, he turns, holds out his hands to help Eddie up, “Can’t just leave it for the gang! Don’t you wanna be able to say ‘I made this’ about our home?”

Eddie smiles in amusement, “Not really? Why do it when I’m paying people to do it?”

Steve snorts, “And I was the one raised rich.” He lets out a breathy laugh, “It’s really rewarding to make something that will last, love.”

Eddie finally grabs his hands and pulls himself up, “Fine, we’ll try it the Steve way.”

Turns out the Steve Way is the best for Steve and Eddie in terms of physical labor, by the time they physically cannot do anymore work, the bedrooms and game room are all ready to be painted and floored. They retreat back to their apartment, muscles screaming as they curl up on the couch to watch some sort of cartoon playing.

They’re both too sleepy to do much of anything but lazily kiss and soak in the comfort of being together.

They fall asleep on the couch that night, curled together and uncaring about the body pains they’ll wake up with.

When they wake up, the body pains are very present. They move to their bed to sleep in more but actually comfortably, sleepy kisses are exchanged before Steve’s pulling Eddie into his chest. They sleep well into the afternoon.

When they wake, they laugh through a late lunch, then jump in the shower, washing each other with gentle hands before Steve’s dropping to his knees, giving perhaps the sloppiest blow job he’s given Eddie, especially since the water hitting the two of them has made it almost impossible. Eddie cums down Steve’s throat after a few rough swallows.

They fall back onto the couch afterwards, “What’s the plan for today?”

Steve shrugs, “I got nothin’.”

“Wanna try something new?” Eddie breathes out.

Steve giggles, “You can go again?”

Eddie cocks a brow, “Who says I need to cum?”

Steve mirrors Eddie, “You really wanna play with me-” He leans closer to Eddie, lips about an inch away from Eddie’s ear, he lowers his voice to a whisper, “Without cumming in my tight little pussy, daddy?”

Eddie growls a little at that before he’s yanking Steve to their room, “Grab the blanket.” He lets go of Steve’s wrist before grabbing the box full of toys. Steve is quick to grab the blanket and spread it over the bed, he rushes strip before racing to Eddie’s feet, dropping roughly to his knees, hands resting on his thighs as he looks up at Eddie. Eddie coos, “Oh sweet thing.” Steve smiles in excitement, pouting a bit when Eddie sits on the bed with something in his hands, “Lay over my lap, love.”

Steve rushes to his feet before laying over Eddie’s clothed thighs, only a tinge nervous at what Eddie has in store, “Mmk, daddy.”

Steve yelps at the ringed hand striking his left ass cheek, “Trying something new, baby.”

He hears the sound of a lighter lighting, “Daddy?”

“How’s some wax play sound, baby? Maybe some cig play?”

“‘S not up to me daddy. ‘M just a toy.” Steve hums out, sighing happily at the fingers trailing his back.

“That’s right, angel.” Eddie hits again, this time on the opposite cheek. He smells the distinct smell of cigarette smoke, Eddie next words come out a bit muffled, “‘Member your safewords, honey?”

“Yes, daddy.” Steve breathes out, biting back a scream at the feeling of a cigarette being pressed into the flesh of his ass, “Fuck!” He breathes out, hands gripping the edge of the mattress, a thready moan escaping as Eddie pulls it away.

Eddie rubs over it with his thumb, “That’s my good boy-” Steve hums in response, “Takin’ what daddy gives you so well.”

Steve speaks through the tears, “T-thank you daddy.”

“You cryin’ for me sweet boy?” Eddie speaks through the cigarette before bringing a hand down on the cheek without the burn.

Steve yelps a moan, “Yes, daddy-”  

Eddie shoves his fingers into Steve’s mouth, voice still muffled by his cigarette, “Wanna see baby-” He uses his fingers as a fish hook to turn Steve’s face to look up at him as best as he can, “Oh, love.” Steve looks up dazedly, indulging in the horny thought, closing his lips around Eddie’s fingers and sucking, “Such a goddamn dream angel.”

Steve swirls his tongue around Eddie’s fingers, moaning wantonly around them at the feeling of Eddie pushing on his burn.

Eddie’s fingers vanish, before Steve can even question it, the cigarette is pushed back into his skin, “What a good ashtray, baby.” Steve hums, head falling limp against Eddie’s palm as he mindlessly sucks on Eddie’s fingers. Eddie puts out the rest of the cigarette, drags the diminishing bud up to Steve’s hip. Steve chokes on a sob at the feeling, cumming with a sniffle, going easily as Eddie pulls him further onto the mattress, Eddie kisses each burn before turning Steve onto his back, “Color, sweets.”

His voice comes out soft, “‘m green, daddy.”

“My sweet boy-” Eddie kisses along Steve’s jaw, “You want more pain?”

Steve nods frantically, voice still soft and sweet, “Wanna be covered in your marks, daddy.”

Eddie pulls back with a fond smile, “I can do that, Stevie.”

Steve’s response is cut off with a rough slap to his cunt, “F-fuck-” Steve watches through half-lidded eyes as Eddie leans to the side, comes back with the lit candle before blowing it out, he slowly tips the candle over Steve’s chest, Steve’s voice cracks as it comes out- half screamed, “T-thank you daddy-”

Eddie trails the wax down Steve’s hip, to his thigh, “Such good manners, pup. Such good training.”

Steve can’t catch his breath, moans high and thready, “Can I cum? Please daddy?”

“Yeah, baby. Cum for daddy.” Eddie pours the wax up between Steve’s pecs, looping it around Steve’s nipples before Steve’s arching up with a screamed whine as he cums. Eddie’s quick to set the candle down away from the two of them before he’s hitting Steve’s cunt again, not pulling away to instead shove two fingers into Steve’s hole.

Steve gasps out a moan, “D-daddy-”

Eddie’s fingers set a quick pace, “One more time, baby.” Steve whimpers, tears streaking down Steve’s temples as his body writhes, burns scraping against the soft fabric beneath him, tender skin sore at the weight Eddie’s pressing against him, he cries through his last orgasm. Eddie’s quick to pulls Steve close, provides first aid to the burns, tosses the sex blanket off the bed to pulls Steve into his arms as Steve cries, “I’ve got you, lovey. Let it out.”

Steve shakes in Eddie’s arms, the ache comforting something deep inside, sewing together his torn apart insides, remedying a hurt Steve hadn’t realized was that bad. He feels safe. So warm and comforted, the fluffy feeling in his head takes over. He can only remember the cold feeling of water hitting his tongue, Eddie’s fingers combing through his hair, his words come out short and slurred, “L’v you.”

“I love you sweet pea. Get some rest.”

Notes:

So sorry for the MASSIVE beginning note (edit: and end note, I apparently have a lot to say).
I just have a few more things to say given all the drama going on with Steddie twt right now.
I am non-binary, maybe a trans man (idk it's something I'm still exploring) but that said- does not make me immune to writing something that may come off in the wrong way. My goal is to never make anyone uncomfortable or fetishize a group of people. I personally use this writing to explore my identity and my kinks and trauma and shit. But if ANYTHING I write makes you uncomfortable PLEASE let me know and I will do my best to change that behavior.
Alright, heavy shit out of the way-
I have two more fics planned for this series (but I also originally only had five fics planned, so that may change) I really only wanted to use this series to try out some kinks I haven't written before and I love you guys for following along. Thanks for all the love. <3

Series this work belongs to: