Chapter Text
It hurts, when they get the order. SpecGru and KorTac are together when Elias gives the speech, announcing the operation’s success. It means an end. She’s always hated those and her eyes drift across the space to Simon. He’s watching her and she smiles sadly.
She can’t see if he sends one her way or not, the distance is far too great. It’s a nice speech, but after hearing those words, she can’t focus on it. This is it. König slowly moves through the crowd and he comes to rest his hip against the crate she’s sitting on. His shoulder brushes against hers, there to support her and nothing else. She appreciates it.
Afterwards, there’s a strange sense of joy because they’re able to go home, and a stranger hint of melancholy, both from what’ll be a dry spell of action and not seeing most of the teammates for a time.
To her, it’s stranger. She has no home. Hers is with KorTac. It’s a vacation and nothing more. But not seeing Simon? That tugs on her heartstrings, those old—maybe new—emotions welling her in as she considers how long it might be before she can see him again.
Being here has been pure bliss, having both men by her side, both intimidating enough to shut up anyone who tries anything with her. She likes the members of SpecGru. It’s clear to most that she and Simon have some form of connection — he doesn’t act half as warm with any members of SpecGru as he does with her.
She and Soap have become better friends. He still doesn’t approve of her methods, but neither does Simon. He understands what’s going on, mostly. It took some time for him to get used to it, but being able to be as touchy as she wants to be with both men while in a social setting lifts a weight from her chest. And he’s funny, that doesn’t hurt either.
Simon finds her sometime later on. Of course, the alcohol has made its way forth. A preemptive goodbye celebration is what Fisker calls it and no one is about to disagree with him.
“Hi.” She smiles and bumps his shoulder with her own.
“You look like I’m gone already.”
“Am I not allowed to be a little sad?” She sighs and sips at her beer.
“’Course you are, love,” he says and nudges his hand against her own. “But you’ve got my number… You going back home?”
“Nope. Sold it.”
He frowns.
“What, the house?”
She shrugs. “Never used it. Couldn’t bear it, and I spent maybe a month there a year anyway… Maybe I’ll take a week in Vietnam, I’ve always wanted to see it.”
“We have seen it.”
“Okay, see it when we’re not trying to track down Circle spies,” she scoffs and rolls her eyes. “A week in Vietnam, past Thailand and Indonesia, Singapore? That could be fun.”
“Want company?”
Her eyebrows shoot up on her forehead. “Really?”
This time, he shrugs. “Maybe you’re right.”
“Of course, I am…”
Fisker cheers loudly from the poker table, slamming down the drink while Aksel shouts and Graves rushes to his feet, pointing and raving about how they’re surely cheating. Soap and Price bark out laughs at the blond’s expense.
“What exactly am I right about?” She asks, turning back to Simon.
“I don’t think the parts of countries I’ve seen are them at their best,” he chuckles, deep and hoarse.
“It took you until now to realise?” She huffs, but from the look in his eyes, she falters. It’s something she gets. So much blood and fighting, it’s hard to see how there’s anything else in the world. “That’s why I split it. There’s work, home, but I leave that behind when I go on vacation.”
He cocks an eyebrow. “You tellin’ me you found a proper vice?”
“Call it what you want.” She smiles sadly. “It’s worked… as has being with König.”
“Since you won’t leave KorTac… I’m glad you’ve got him around to keep you happy,” he says reluctantly, but she knows he’s come to think of him as more of a friend. Their competition has become friendlier, neither of them trying quite as hard to win but fine with the fight and bickering.
“You know I’m going to still miss you, right?”
He grins, “I’d hoped so.”
“You’re different in the best ways,” she sighs, swirling the liquid in her can. Suddenly, she whips around, pointing straight at his masked face. “But if you ever pull a shitty stunt like that or make some decision for me? I swear to God I won’t hesitate to shoot you, Si.”
“Point taken,” he laughs and grabs onto her hand, holding it between them as he turns just enough for no one else to see. It’s strangely domestic. She’s missed that about him too. Before things became all fucked, they’d go on proper dates together.
“So… would you wear this?” She grins, tugging at the bottom of his mask.
“Maybe not the whole thing.”
“It’d cause a lot more attention than if you weren’t,” she laughs and licks her lips. “Not that I mind it.”
“You wouldn’t mind me tagging along then?”
“No,” she grins, “I wouldn’t mind. But I can’t promise König won’t be there too.”
He nods. “Alright.”
König spots them, lumbering in their direction while trying to make himself look as small as possible. He always does in any social setting. He stands in front of them, reaching out and tugging her closer by her belt.
“What are the two of you whispering about, Häschen,” he says warmly. She can’t help but smile at the scent of alcohol lingering on him. The fault lies fully with Soap who was sure he could drink more than the large man, even with the size difference. She doesn’t mind, seeing him intoxicated; it’s amusing.
“Travelling after.” She smiles, running her free hand over his stomach. “Simon wants to come along, just like you. Funny how that works out, isn’t it.”
He hums and his hand clutches the back of her neck, large enough to encompass all of it. “If he’s still willing to share.”
The two men share a look. It’s enough.
It makes the actual goodbye much easier for her. König has his arm draped around her shoulders and she leans against him while speaking to Simon. That same old feeling rushes through her, but she’s made her peace with it. It can’t be the same, things have changed — and even back then it hardly worked.
König understands her, every part, and he makes things better. Always.
She takes a step forward and slings her arms around Simon’s neck, uncaring for the other people busy doing their jobs around the runway. He’s surprised. They never show this much affection in public. He’s going back to the UK — just for a few days. They’ll meet up later.
It’s not a goodbye. That’ll come later but it won’t be forever. Of course, there’s still an issue looming in the back of her mind. What if they end up on opposite sides? There will always be a chance of it. But maybe they can be prepared. It won’t be a lot, communication is mostly prohibited while they’re on short operations but a little text will be all that’s needed. A location. Hopefully, the next step is something they can figure out if it ever happens.
Yet, she can’t help watching Simon’s back as he and the rest of SpecGru file into the plane. She and KorTac will leave soon too. It hurts, watching him leave. Her eyelashes flutter as she fights back the burn behind her eyes.
Things will always be complicated between them… but around him, she’s forced to face her humanity, and remember that she does have strings of empathy and compassion somewhere deep down.
König doesn’t hold a mirror to her, he understands when she enjoys it. But maybe neither is better than the other. Maybe, that’s simply how things are: different. The massive man wraps his arms around her from behind, resting his chin atop her head and releases a deep breath. He hugs her close and squeezes the doubtful thoughts out of her.
For now, she can forget about them. Maybe when Simon returns she’ll have to think about it again but until then, she’ll revel in this and enjoy every second of it.