Work Text:
Charon runs down the hallway, metal joints creaking and echoing through the walls. There was a alert- the main foyer door seems to have been broken through. He believes that whoever here is likely from Poseidon, or maybe Zeus. Or it could just be…Cerberus, jumping out the window out of boredom again.
He makes it to the main room- and goes to open the door before remembering he should definitely knock. He does so, and within a minute or so, the dark rustic door swings open, with a amused Hades smiling back at him.
“What’s the problem, Brian?”
“Didn’t I tell you not to call me that?”
“Maybe.”
He sighs.
“There’s someone in the building, I believe they made it through the window?”
“Oh? As in the one above the door?”
“…yeah. I just fixed that one too.”
“You want me to send Jonny after him? He does good work as home defense.”
“Er; just put him on comms? Please?”
“You’re being awfully nice, shame. Yeah I’ll get him out there.”
The door shuts then, and Brian Charon is left there. He really didn’t want to clean up a dead body today, but oh well.
Preemptively, he begins to make his way to the foyer, where the noises of violence make themselves known.
Bending down to look through the door’s stained glass, he sees lasers blasting off, and the noise of yelling. He’s nearly content to just watch until he sees who Cerberus is fighting.
Thats-
He kicks open the door, feeling it crunch a bit as he steps into the room. Both Cerberus and the man pause, guns aimed at eachother.
“Hey Charon! Wanna join the fun?” Cerberus smiles, and Charon nearly wants to.
“I’m- Cerberus. Do you know who you’re aiming your gun at?”
“Hmh? Of course. You’re the one who called the intruder alarm.”
“That’s- Zeus’s son.”
He sees the man wince, before sneering, “Mind talking to me? Not sure what’s going on here.”
“You shouldn’t even be here, so no. Is Zeus trying to start up Illium again?”
“I- no. You can’t-“
“What. Did. He. Send. You. For.”
Charon might not look intimidating, with his fancy suits and clipboards. But he’s still completely made of metal and has a height to show.
The man gulps, and puts his gun back in front of him. “I was sent to retrieve Cerberus.”
Charon and Cerberus both pause. Then Cerberus laughs.
“You- you’re here for me?!”
The man blanks.
“Is- Isn’t Cerberus the Hound of Hades- guardian of the Acheron- a- yknow- dog?” The man stutters.
“A dog! Charon! They think I’m a dog!”
“I can’t believe Im hearing this with my own ears.”
“Hey- kid- do you even know what a dog is?”
“I’m not- sure. No. I don’t.”
Cerberus gives him a smirk. and that’s how Charon has to sneak the poor guy a Octokitten. Turns out, City folk don’t know what dogs are. A eight legged cat is good enough.
When the two join Persephone and Hades for drinks, they tell the tale and Hades pays for an extra round of drink out of pity.
.