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Change Your Heart or Die

Summary:

Pac is doing well, well enough at least, and FitMC could not be more enamored with him. When Forever gives Fit an order to leave Pac alone or suffer the consequences, Fit can't help but go into protection mode.

Little does he know how attractive that protection is to Pac.

Notes:

Forever is a well-meaning antagonist here. Everyone has a lot of misplaced feelings.

I am working through prompts I've saved for years and years, and this will be part of that collection. Hope you enjoy xx

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Fit’s lost count of how long he’s been on the island. He’s sure it’s in the 200-day range, but he’s aware he’s losing his sense of time. Not like he had much of an awareness of that before Quesedilla Island, but many things in his life have changed since he arrived here. He has a bed to sleep in that he doesn’t worry about being griefed. He has a son, new friends, and he has Pac.

The other island residents have good intentions. Fit knows this, but he can’t help but clench up whenever someone treats Pac with kid gloves. Pac, who has survived and pushed himself forward, not only searching for his missing family but creating an antidote while under the influence, all to get them back. Pac, who designs the most gorgeous areas Fit has ever seen, despite constantly saying he’s not that great at it. Pac, who could take down half a dungeon on his own if everyone would stop being so damned careful around him all the time. Fit sometimes wonders if Pac spends so much time with him because he can see what everyone else ignores: Pac is a survivor, and if there’s anything Fit knows about, it’s surviving. It’s okay if Pac can’t always see how much of a badass he is; self-confidence is a hell of a thing. That’s where Fit comes in.

Defining his relationship with Pac is pointless. He’s spent so long alone, so long denying himself the right to dream of a place to call home; he’s happy to take whatever it is they’re doing day by day. Baby steps, he once said to himself.

It’s not his fault if his baby steps seem to be overtaken by Pac’s strides.

Pac is the one who kisses Fit first. Pac is the one who uses the word ‘date’ for the first time during one of their daily adventures. Pac has always been the driving force in whatever is going on between them, and for once in his life, Fit is more than happy to be the passenger along for the ride. He will take every ounce of affection Pac offers like a man starved, whether deserved or not. No one else needs to know about it right now. This is just for them—a refuge in an island that seems dedicated to destroying them both repeatedly.

Right now, as Fit stands in the Favela with Pac at his side, debating what to do with their day, Fit feels alive. It’s been a long time since he’s woken up in the morning excited to see what the day brings. Fit never knows if he and Pac will have a meaningful conversation about life, run around in balaclavas to spook the other islanders, or merely hang out with their kids. It’s a nice, new feeling.

As Pac and Fit decide upon their daily plan, the familiar noise of a warpstone infiltrates their quiet, relaxed world. Forever appears, clad in his suit, looking far too weary this early in the morning. Both greet him with a wave, and Forever nods their way, waving back. As he nears the two, his voice breaks through the crisp air.

“Fit, may I speak with you for a moment, please? I have some things to ask you about.”

Fit’s eyes flit from Pac over to Forever, who stands a few feet away. His trademark smile is there, and he is doing his best to look confident and kind. Fit knows that look. He may not be close to Forever or know him well, but if there’s one thing Fit excels at, it’s noticing. You don’t stay alive by walking into situations blind. Fit watches everyone constantly, notices their quirks, the way their eyes light up in joy or narrow in suspicion. He’s seen this look on Forever before and may not know what to expect, but he knows he is trying to put on a polite face to not upset Pac. Lately, people have been doing that too goddamn much for Fit’s liking. There’s a steely coolness to Forever’s eyes as Fit meets them, and a chill runs up his spine. He’s not afraid, not even worried. This is a challenge, and FitMC has never backed down from a challenge.

“Sure thing, Forever, one sec,” Fit says, turning to face Pac. “I’ll see what he wants, and we can grab lunch. Maybe stop at Philza’s on the way? See if the kids want to join us by the fishing beach?” Fit offers with a smile. His genuine smiles seem only to go the way of Pac and Ramon these days, and if anyone saw the way Pac beams at him in return, he knows they’d understand.

“No problem, I will wait for you. Maybe I should message Philza and tell Cellbit we’ll come get the boys soon?”

“Thanks, Pac. You’re the best.”

Fit hands out compliments to Pac like candy. Fit is always pleased to see he can contribute a bit to everyone’s happiness around him, especially Pac’s. After everything he’s been through, it’s nice to see him smile when given a compliment again.

“Stop, you flatter me,” Pac says, smirking and rolling his eyes in the process. “Now go talk; I am starving. Hurry!”

Fit laughs as he raises his hands to his chest, palms toward Pac, to gesture he’s moving on. After a few steps, he turns on his heels, smiling over their little interaction. Forever is still beaming when Fit approaches, but the way his eyes linger on Pac for a moment too long puts Fit on edge.

“Hey, Forever. What’s up?” Fit asks. Forever sighs in response before he begins his monologue, turning his body to avoid Pac’s gaze.

“Listen, Fit, I like you. You are a good guy. However, you have been spending a lot of time with Pac lately. And that is fine; it is all good. But he is very, how do you say? He is broken easy. He has lost so much, and he carries so much sad with him. I do not want you to do anything to hurt him when he is in this state, so I think maybe you should stay away from him for a little while.”

Fit is quiet. His heart is pounding in his ears, and he’s seeing red, but he remains cool, calm, and collected. He has to. There’s enough violence around this server without him setting Forever into a death loop.

“I respect you wanting to keep Pac safe, believe me. Nothing means more to me than keeping him safe. But I think he should be the one to decide if I stay or go, Mister President.”

Fit knows the power his voice carries, and he knows how to use it to his advantage. One deep breath is all he needs to drop his tone even lower than usual. He knows how to keep his voice smooth and relaxed, even if he wants to scream in Forever’s face for not trusting Pac as much as he claims. It’s not worth it. Pac is only a few feet away, and Fit has no plans to make his day worse, no matter how much adrenaline is coursing through his system.

“Normally, I agree, but he is not in his right mind now. We both know this. I am not saying you cannot be friends; I’m just saying he needs stability right now, and you are not known for being from a stable place, Fit.”

“Are you implying you don’t trust me with Pac? Using my past against me is a bit low, don’t you think? I don’t see you doing the same for BadBoyHalo, or Cellbit, or, hell, even Philza. You let them care for the eggs and everyone else. Why is Pac different?”

Forever motions to speak, but Fit cuts him off before he can.

“The real question here is this: why don’t you trust Pac to make decisions for himself? You’ve said who we were before doesn’t define us, yet here you are telling me I’m not good enough to spend time with Pac? Regardless of how he feels about it? Are you considering his opinions, or are you just saying this so you don’t look bad if you fail to protect your family again?”

It’s a low blow, but Fit is riled up now. He can barely believe the audacity of Forever to assume that he would do anything to put Pac in danger, physically or mentally.

“Pac is my family, Fit. I have to look out for him, both as his family and as the President. You must understand.”

“Well, you got a real fucked up way of showing that then. Where were you when he went missing? Where were you when Mike went missing? Were you waking up each day to search for him? To search with him? Were you there when he came off the drugs you brought into our lives? Or the days that followed? I don’t doubt that you love him like family, but you can’t stand here, look me in the eye, and tell me you did everything you could to protect him.”

Forever’s jaw clenches. Fit knows that if Pac weren’t close by, Forever would have likely punched him by now. It amuses Fit in a way; he’s being raked over the coals for being too unstable to look out for Pac; meanwhile, Pac is the only reason he isn’t in a fistfight right now. Gotta love it.

“FIt, if you do not stop putting Pac in danger, I will be forced to take action. And I take my role very, very seriously. The Federation and I will be watching.”

“Are you threatening me, Mister President?” Fit’s control gives, and he allows his voice to grow louder, just enough to show he’s defending himself.

Pac turns from his spot, looking up from his communicator, clearly listening in. Fit knows his voice carries, and he’s done trying to play nice. If Forever wants to do this, Pac should be able to hear.

“I think you’d know better than to threaten me, of course, knowing where I come from—knowing some of the things I did before I came to the island. You’ve clearly done so much research into my past without asking me, so who is telling you about this? Your good friend Cucurucho?”

“Fit, that’s not-”

“Like hell it isn’t!” Fit says, curt and terse. “You’re allowed to use my past against me, but I can’t call you out? You’re the President. You took an oath to protect the islanders, yet the person you’re trying to protect was drugged because of your influence, and he still managed to save you both. He’s stronger than the rest of you combined. The island is full of tension right now; do you really think trying to threaten me is the way to go? I know what I’ve done. If Pac has a problem with it, he can tell me himself. If he doesn’t care, maybe it’s time for us to stop holding onto the people we used to be.”

Forever meets his eye, and Fit can read guilt all over his face. He knows emotions are high lately. Forever is allowing his guilt to eat him alive, but it’s no excuse. In a day or two, Fit will have an adult conversation with Forever and sort this all out, but right now, a desire to intimidate is running through his veins. All he wants is to have a nice day out fishing with Pac, Ramon, Richas, and their friends. Forever’s little pity party can wait.

“Fine. Have it your way. But do not crawl to me if something goes wrong.” Forever says with a broken look. Fit nods, ready to get the fuck out of the Flavela, but he can’t resist summoning 2B2T Fit for one moment, just to put the fear of god into Forever. Clearing his throat, Fit rolls his shoulders back, stretching himself to his full height. He’s eye to eye with Forever, and in a physical fight, Fit knows he can take Forever with no problem. It’s invigorating.

“I respect you, Forever. But know that if you try to come between Pac and me again, 3000 totems won’t be nearly enough to save you. Have a good day, Mr. President.”

Fit turns on his heel to walk away from Forever, only to run into Pac’s chest. How long he’d been standing behind him, he’s unsure, but judging by the soft, glassy look in Pac’s eyes, Fit would guess he overheard quite a bit.

“Goodbye Forever. Thank you for your concern. I know you didn’t mean any harm, but ask me how I feel next time. Do not talk for me. I am not one of the eggs. Remember that.” Pac says, dragging his eyes away from Forever. “C’mon Fit. Let’s go.”

Pac grabs Fit by the hand and pulls him away from the confrontation, neither bothering to give Forever a glance. Pac is pulling Fit toward the newest addition of homes to the Flavela, and it takes Fit a moment to process they’re going the opposite way they had planned.

“Pac! We’re going the wrong way, we gotta get the waystone ov–”

Fit’s voice is drowned out by Pac’s mouth crashing up into his. Pac had kissed him before, sure, but those had been fleeting kisses. Quick pecks to the lips as a thank you and once, a drawn-out, soft kiss when they escaped certain death. Pac has never kissed Fit like this.

Pac kisses the life out of him. Fit can barely get a full breath before he’s backed against one of the doors in the favela; he can’t be sure which. Pac’s lips press hard against his own, and Pac’s fingers dig into the skin of his biceps, pinning him to the door. Fit could break away easily, use his strength to change their positions or break the kiss entirely, but he’s too drawn in by the feeling of Pac’s hands on him to care. He kisses Pac back with all his energy, meeting Pac’s intensity. He wants Pac to know that however Pac feels for Fit, Fit feels it, too. Maybe more, if he’s honest with himself.

Pac breaks the kiss first, pulling away from Fit’s lips to take quick breaths, panting as he rests his forehead against Fit’s shoulder momentarily. Pac is mumbling under his breath, too quiet for Fit to hear. Fit doesn’t dare move as Pac’s hands shift from pinning his biceps to the door to running up and down over them. It’s such a slight movement, but Fit assumes this must be like being dragged through the sky by a capybara. He’s brimming with adrenaline but so happy he could almost laugh. Finally, Pac pulls his head away and looks up at Fit with those gorgeous, dark doe eyes of his. At this moment, a stiff breeze could break Fit into pieces.

“I’m so sorry, Fit, but I just had to do that. That was so…sexy. It was sexy, Fit.” Pac admits with a heavy blush, but looking more confident than Fit had seen him in weeks.

Fit catches his breath, rolling his head back against the door to look at the sky above for a moment. His heart rate is through the roof.

“Yeah, yeah. Goddamn, what a kiss. You’ve been holding out on me, Pac.” Fit teases.

“Huh? Oh yes, the kiss was sexy, too, but I mean the other thing. You. And Forever.” Pac admits with a shy smile.

“Please do not bring up Forever after you’ve just kissed the soul out of me, Pac. I have a fragile ego.” Fit jokes. Pac removes his arms from Fit’s just to slap at his shoulder, laughing.

“Not like that! Not like this! No, I mean you talking like that to Forever. You sounded so cool. You should keep doing that.”

“Keep doing what? Being an asshole?”

“No! Being terrifying! Like a, a…oh, what is it? A threat! You sounded like a threat.”

“Pac, I am not terrifying,” Fit laughs. Sure, he may be intimidating when he needs to be, but terrifying is not really his style.

“Of course not, not to me. But to others, a bit yes. It’s kinda…y’know.” Pac says, face flushed as he wiggles his eyebrows at Fit.

Fit quirks a brow of his own, taken aback by Pac’s admission.

“Wait. Are you saying me being threatening is…attractive?” Fit has never considered this before, but god, it sends his heart back into overdrive.

“Uh, I mean- Yes?” Pac says, hiding his face behind his hands, only to open two fingers to peer through and gauge Fit’s reaction.

“Oh. Well, why didn’t you say so? Goddamn, if me threatening people gets me kissed like that, then let’s issue some fucking tickets out here. Let's get a line forming!”
Pac doubles over laughing as Fit rambles excitedly.

“I think I could take ‘em. Well, maybe not all of them in hand-to-hand combat, but let me do my thing, and they’ll never know what hit ‘em. Lavacasting the Federation building wasn’t even a struggle. Imagine what I could do if I had time to plan.” Fit says, peering down at Pac with a smug smile. Pac’s face flushes as he unconsciously bites at one of his hoodie strings. Fit has never felt so proud.

“Please, Fit, I cannot take this right now; I need to lie down if you’re going to talk like this,” Pac says, fanning himself with one hand, smirking up at Fit through his lashes.

Fit laughs. He’s blushing, but his newfound confidence surges through. He reaches down and grabs one of Pac’s hands in his own.

“Alright, we’ll take a raincheck on this for now, but I won’t forget it anytime soon. Let’s get our boys and have a nice lunch. That work for you?”

Pac smiles up at Fit, nodding as he interlaces his fingers with Fit’s own.

“Sounds great, yes. I am still starving.” Pac admits with a sad look, cueing the puppy dog eyes that render Fit weak. “Please, Fit. I am wasting away! Let’s get the kids and head to Phil’s. Even if I must suffer with avocado toast.”

Fit chuckles as they walk hand in hand toward the Flavela waystone, a mischievous glint in his eye. Right before they teleport, Fit leans into Pac’s ear, dropping his pitch.

“And then maybe tonight, once the kids are asleep, I can tell you about my history of spawn-trapping and creating infinite death loops.”

“Oh my god. You are a menace.”

“Yeah, yeah. And you’re so into it.” Fit teases.

Pac looks up to Fit, all smiles. His eyes are bright, and he looks relaxed. Happy, even. Pac momentarily rests his head on Fit’s arm, breathing deeply before catching Fit’s eyes again.

“I really, really am.”

Notes:

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I spend most days quietly thirsting over Etoiles, for I am weak.