Chapter Text
“Hunk your stance is off! Pidge that block was sloppy!”
“UGH!” Pidge groaned, stepping away from Hunk to glare at the blue paladin, “Why do we even need to go over this? We have the lions! Aren’t they supposed to be really powerful anyways?”
“The Voltron lions are powerful, but you have to remember Pidge, that you’re not always going to be piloting them. We’ll have missions that will require us to be outside the lions and even at times leave them behind, in those instances you need to know how to protect yourself.” Lance sighed, looking utterly annoyed. “Now. Again .” He commanded, crossing his arms as he gave Pidge a hard stare.
Pidge grumbled, annoyed, but did as instructed. Her body was aching, and she was sore in places she shouldn’t be sore at, she was exhausted and she just wanted a break but Mr. Tyrant over there wouldn’t let up.
They’ve been in the training deck since they first woke up and that was hours ago. Who in their right mind trains for hours? It was just ridiculous.
She hadn’t even been able to fully sleep. She kept waking up plagued by nightmares of their previous mission that had gone so terribly wrong, and would have gone even worse if not for Lance making an appearance. Her brain wouldn’t shut off and it kept providing her different scenarios of what would’ve happened if he hadn’t gotten to them in time. If Lance hadn’t gotten to her in time.
She wouldn’t ever be able to finish looking for her family because she wouldn’t even be given a chance.
The thought of that made her dizzy.
It was finally when she thought of what could’ve happened to her, that it finally settled on her that this wasn’t just an epic journey through space helping free other alien nations.
No.
This was a war, and it is a high probability that she could die at any given moment.
She didn’t want to die, she’s only 15 for goodness sake!
Maybe learning to properly fight and to pilot wasn’t a bad idea, but she was still scared. She could keep going out into the field and fight, but there would be one day where she wouldn’t come back.
Oh God.
What if her dad and Matt were fighting too? What if they went on a mission and never returned? Oh gosh, she couldn’t think about that.
Is it just her, or was the room spinning? It must be the room spinning because she was so out of breath, she couldn’t breathe properly.
Why couldn’t she breathe properly?
Ah shit, Hunk looks hazy. Wait, why does Hunk look hazy?? Is her stomach finally catching up to her brain? That must be it, there is no other explanation.
Nope none at all.
.
“-dge! Pidge breathe!”
Did Hunk not know she couldn’t breathe. No matter how hard she tried she couldn’t breathe.
Her father. Her brother. They were out there somewhere. And she didn’t even know if they were alive. What if they weren’t, what then? What would she tell her mother? Her mother who she left behind all by herself in search of her missing family.
Oh God.
What if she died while up here? Then who would be there for her mother?
She shouldn't have left. Shouldn't have left her mother alone. Now her mom probably thinks she’s also dead.
Would the misery never stop for the Holt family??
“Come on Pidge deep breaths, in for six, out for four,” Lance says calmly, standing close but not touching her. He coaches her through it for the next minute. The next painstakingly long minute. Once her breathing settles, and she’s much calmer, her thoughts no longer running a mile a minute she feels her whole face heat up in embarrassment and refuses to look at anyone.
With a sigh Lance dismisses them. Pidge has never run so fast in her life.
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“How’s training going?” Coran asks.
Lance sighs –He’s been doing that a lot lately he’s noticed– stepping out of the room that contained the cleaning equipment, two buckets in hand with a bunch of rags, wipes, disinfectant, and a bunch of other stuff.
“That bad?” Coran asks
“Pidge had a panic attack earlier today.”
“Really? What do you think caused it?”
“I’m not sure. There are a lot of things that could’ve caused it, but I don’t know them well enough to pinpoint the cause of it.”
“It might be the reality of the situation finally setting in.”
Lance looked at Coran, right eyebrow arched and a confused expression on his face.
“Ah right, I forget that you just joined us. It hasn’t even been a full movement.” Coran said, twirling his mustache in his fingers
“The other paladins come from a peaceful planet. A planet that is untouched by the Galra.”
“What?” Lance stopped walking, looking at Coran in shock. A planet free of the rule of Galra? Impossible.
“Just like you heard it number three. From my understanding they haven’t seen war, heard of it definitely, but never been in one.”
Never been in one huh? Wouldn’t that be something?
“That sounds like something made up, Coran.”
“Oh it does, doesn’t it.” Coran agreed, grinning at him “but, for me two movements ago the Galra were our friends and allies, the king and queen were still alive, and every other planet was free. So for me the thought of a planet being untouched by Zarkon isn’t so farfetched, for you however” Coran trailed off looking at Lance with a knowing look.
Lance gulped looking away, and instead changed the topic. “How are you handling all of this Coran? You were with family and friends enjoying a peaceful time that for you was only two movements ago. And then suddenly you wake up 10,000 deca-phoebs into the future, thrust into a raging war that you were there when it began, you and the princess the only ones left of your kind, family and friends gone forever. How do you do it?”
Coran took a moment to answer the question, looking the most serious Lance had ever seen him be.
“It’s definitely not easy my boy. I catch myself heading to King Alfor’s bed chambers in the morn, ready to tease him for sleeping in. It will be a difficult task to rouse him up, but as always I would make so much noise pretending to look for something that we both know are not in his chambers. He will then be scared to face the queen as Melenor would already be in the dining room prim and proper as ever, ready to scold him for setting such an example on Allura. And then reality sets in when I pass by the guest bedrooms that are now the paladin’s rooms and I hear Pidge and Hunk bickering. Or I see Shiro and Keith walking back from the training deck sporting their paladin armor. And then finally I see Allura.” Coran paused looking ahead of him as if seeing ghosts, Lance wasn’t too sure he wasn’t. “Princess Allura who is far too young to be Queen, instead of seeing her sitting at the left of the table with her father at the head, and her mother at his right, she will be sitting at the head. It’s hard. I sometimes look behind ready to tell the usual guard a joke, or a comment ... .and then I do and no one is there. Everyone that worked in the palace is suddenly gone and I feel how empty it is. Sometimes I curse at Alfor for pushing me into the cryo pod without a warning. It’s not fair that I get to outlive all the people I knew and have to finish a war that started so many deca-phoebs ago. Sometimes Lance, I don’t want to get up, because the ghosts of everyone that I knew haunts me, but then I think of Allura and how she’s probably suffering as well. And the thought of her and that she is still here with me, and at least I’m not alone is enough for me to keep going.”
“At least that’s the long answer. The short answer is that there are still others that need help. And if I can provide at least a smidge of that, I’ll keep going. No matter how hard it is to get up.”
Lance nodded agreeing with Coran’s statement. It was the same for him, even if one person was in need of help he would do anything to do so.
“Now let's get rid of this heavy mood shall we! Back to the paladins!” Coran grinned, the heavy atmosphere dissipating “Do you think a team bonding exercise would help the rest in being able to form Voltron?”
Lance hummed, thinking the idea over. It wasn’t a bad idea, and according to legend the lions all meld together to form into Voltron. Lance guesses that in order to do that, all of their quintessence has to merge together. Lance, however, knows how hard it is to achieve that.
In order for their quintessence to merge, they need to be open with each other, and trust each other fully. Sometimes in dire situations their quintessence can merge due to the nature of the situation, but that is usually not reliable. And with them being chosen as paladins by the lions they need to learn to be open with each other since they are basically now a team.
What to do though? He can’t have them spar against each other, or even use the mind melds to dive into their memories since he guesses that would be met with resistance. He has to think this strategically.
What bond exercise would be good for the team?
“Don’t twist your ears too much lad. You can think it over while we make the ship sparkle!” Coran enthused, his eyes glittering as he skipped ahead. Lance could only chuckle at the Altean.
.
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.
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Frell!
He hated this. Why did he have to be chosen as the blue paladin and get stuck with these idiots!
After the excitement of the day, which thanks so much Sendak for taking control over the castle! Coran had taken Allura to her room so she could finish resting.
And all he wanted was to just lay down and never wake up again, please and thank you.
“I’m done! It’s time to recharge, if the castleship is under attack again, don’t wake me up.” Lance declared, looking tiredly at the rest of the team that were on the bridge.
“What do you mean don’t wake you up?” Shiro asked
“Should we be worried?” Hunk added nervously
“You’re going to sleep at a time like this?” Keith scoffed, shaking his head
“Yes. Why? Do you think I should wait to sleep when we're all safe and warm?” Lance mocked, fanning his eyelashes and giving the best doe eyes he could muster “Yeah right.-” he scoffed “Ta-ta. Don’t wake me up, I need my beauty sleep. I can feel the blemishes wanting to come out.” With that Lance turned around and left, leaving the rest of his team gobsmacked.
.
“I hate him” Keith grounded out, balling his fists in anger next to Shiro. “Why the hell would the blue lion even choose him, couldn’t she choose someone better?”
Keith could feel the disapproving gaze from Shiro, but he could care less.
What was that guy’s problem anyway? He looked at them like they were a chore or a burden even. He could tell, he had always been at the receiving end of those types of looks back when they were on Earth. This was no different; he could just tell that the blue paladin was annoyed by them.
Well guess what? Tough luck, the lions chose them so he had to suck it now.
“Why do you say that?” Pidge asked, tilting her head curiously. Hunk standing right next to her, looked at him expectantly.
“Yeah Keith. Please elaborate” Shiro added
“I don’t know! It’s just clear he doesn’t want to be here!”
“None of us want to be here Keith, we can’t exactly be pointing out the obvious on someone else when it's the same for us.” Pidge said
“No! I mean here, here! As in here with us!”
“What do you mean?” Hunk asked
“You can see it in his eyes. He gets annoyed at us for the simplest of things. I’m sorry I don’t know how long it takes for a Galra ship to reach point B from point A while using hyperspeed! How the hell would I even know that anyways? A few days ago I didn’t even know there was a whole thousand year alien war happening in space!”
“He did grumble a lot when I didn’t know how to block a blow from his sword. But like I've never needed to before.” Pidge added, looking thoughtfully at the ground
“Hunk?” Shiro prodded
Hunk wrung his hands nervously before sighing and adding to the discussion “He was surprised I didn’t know how to fight given my size. And he did say I was a terrible shot with my bayard ‘You’re aiming aimlessly like a dihsgy with no sight,’ or something like that, I have no idea what that is, but it definitely was not a compliment.”
“He’s just being difficult!” Keith complained
“I don’t think that’s what it is Keith” Shiro added calmly
“Oh yeah, then what is it! Why is he being such a hardass? Every minute of every hour he has us doing something. Whether it be training at hand-to-hand combat, weapons training, endurance training, and even piloting training! We have no time to rest, and he just keeps giving us the same look of annoyance. Like we’re just a burden to him and he could probably defeat every enemy by himself! He really thinks so highly of himself? If that's the case why doesn’t he just leave and leave us alone! We can manage without him, we don’t need him.” Keith raged, raising his voice as he went
“Wha– Keith where is this coming from?” Shiro asked. Pidge and Hunk looked at him cautiously as if they didn’t know if he was going to explode again.
Damn all that pent up frustration. He himself didn't even know where that came from.
Who cares if Mr. Im-perfect-in-everything-I-do decides to leave. They’ll be better off without him, he seems to think so himself too with the way he looks at all of them.
That damn look he gives. Like they’re all beneath him and he’s doing them a favor by being here. He hates him. That damn snob of an alien. It makes his skin itch with the desire of punching him in the face and bringing his sorry ass back to reality.
“Look guys! I know he just joined but we need to give him a break, he’s just trying to help.” Shiro supplied helpfully, always being the devil’s advocate. Keith hated when he did that, he knew Shiro wanted to agree as well but was putting on the mask of the controlled responsible leader that he portrayed himself as.
“Really? Doesn’t look like it to me.” Keith huffed, crossing his arms and glaring at his pseudo-brother.
“I mean he did kind of help Pidge earlier today” Hunk said moving away from the shorter’s punch, Pidge glared at the older boy.
“We’re decidedly not talking about that” she said, pushing her glasses up and glaring at everyone else. “All you idiots need to know is he did help me out and was very mindful of my space and didn’t probe with annoying questions!”
“Anyways, aside from that he is trying to help us. He’s training us to be better, I’ve talked to him outside of training Keith, he doesn’t want us to die! He wants the opposite of that! I mean if anything I think he’s probably a little overwhelmed.”
“Why do you say that Hunk?” Shiro asked
“Put yourself in his position, Shiro. He has lived under the rule of the Galra empire for who knows how long, and with how skilled he is, he has definitely been fighting back. Now imagine being told that because a lion from legend chose you, you are now stuck with others who have also been chosen by those same alien lions. But, instead of the teammates that he probably thought were warriors and already witnessed war and can stomach anything. He gets stuck, well…. with us. Aside from Shiro, we don’t know how to fight, earth has been peaceful so we haven’t seen war let alone participated in one. Pidge and I aren’t even pilots! We went to the Garrison for different positions entirely! Aside from the fact that Coran and Allura have been asleep for thousands of years, he is the only one with solid information about the empire!! I just think it's getting to be too much on him and I can see him getting antsy. He’s probably not used to staying in one place for a long period of time, given that he is a warrior and all and probably used to getting missions every other day.” Hunk stopped talking to finally inhale air to get his circulation running again “Just give him a chance Keith! He’s probably struggling the most out of all of us combined. He’s training us, and yeah it's grueling but he’s probably thinking that if any of us get hurt out on the field he will probably blame himself since he’s the one teaching us how to fight.”
Keith scowled, not at all happy with how everything that Hunk said just now made so much sense. Damn it, could he not be angry with this one thing!
“Yeah, well I still don’t like him.”
Shiro, next to him, exhaled roughly. “Keith” he warned
“Tsk. Whatever I’m out.” Keith proclaimed loudly, walking out of the bridge and ignoring the others.
In all honesty Keith didn’t know why he was so mad at the blue paladin. Like Hunk said, he is only trying to help them become better. It still somehow managed to piss him off though.
The blue paladin just irked him for no damn reason.
“Hey there, Mr. Grouch.”
It’s like he knew he was in no mood to talk to anyone. Especially him . His response was just a glare that the other seemed to not have noticed, or if he did he pretended it wasn’t directed at him.
“Want to spar?”
An opportunity to finally beat the shit out of this pretentious prat and get some of this anger out? He didn’t have to be told twice.
After the beating he was about to give the newbie, he better not be at the receiving end of those damn looks that he gives everyone.
“Prepare to be beaten, Idiot.” He challenged
“Oouu a challenge. I like that. Alright.” Lance grinned “Loser has to be on cleaning duty with Coran for the next three movements.”
Keith still had no idea what a movement was, but he’ll be damned if he loses. “You’re on.”
Lance just kept grinning, the look in his eye changing to one of amusement. Keith would just have to change that look in his eyes.