Chapter Text
Cas strapped Claire into the stroller Dean had bought from Walmart. She fussed a little, always preferring to walk, but even though the daycare was only a few blocks away, it would take Claire’s little legs too long to walk there and they had an appointment to keep. Cas began walking down the street, his inner omega yowling at him to go back and take care of their alpha, but child care was hard to find and if they missed this trial, who knew when the next spot would open up.
Cas’s mind and thoughts whirled and spiraled as he made the short walk to the center. He had missed Dean while he was in hospital and was glad he was home, although looking a little worse for wear. He had wanted to visit, even though he was still mad at Dean for doing something so reckless, but he couldn’t stomach seeing him in the hospital, knowing the alpha was there because of Castiel. He wished Dean had confided in him. Cas knew Dean's intentions were honorable and that his only reason for taking Cas and Claire in was to get them off the streets and give them a safe place to live. But Dean was attractive, not to mention kind, funny and caring, and Cas would have been more than happy to accomodate any other ‘arrangement’ to keep the alpha healthy. More than happy.
Cas pushed those thoughts away as he approached the center so he could focus on Claire. He was buzzed through the gates and met with the coordinator of the center. After a quick tour, Cas and Claire were taken to the room where Claire would be spending her time. Castiel watched on as the teacher took Claire to a small table where a group of other children were playing with blocks. Claire hesitated outside the group and looked over at him. He smiled encouragingly and nodded to the table. Cas breathed a sigh of relief when Claire shyly joined the group and began to play. She had never really had a chance to interact with other children and Cas hoped this would help her development.
Once sure she was settled, Castiel was taken to the office where he spent the next hour or so completing Claire’s official enrollment forms. Up until then, Cas had been able to keep his mind off Dean and their current situation. The forms had mostly been filled out, Cas just had to add some more specific information and double check what was already there.
It was only as he was going over the forms, and there were a lot of them, and saw Dean's signature recurring over and over again, that he began to reconsider his relationship with the alpha. The only reason Claire was able to attend this school was because Dean had signed for her as her alpha. He had claimed Claire as his own without a second thought so she would have this chance.
Cas thought back on everything Dean had done for them. Everything he had given to Cas and Claire and his heart swelled with affection. Then it hit him.
“Holy crap, I love him,” he whispered to himself.
Cas sat stock still for a while as the realization sank in and flooded every cell of his body. He made up his mind that as soon as Claire was in bed that night that he and Dean were going to sit down and sort this out once and for all, and he wasn’t going to take ‘no’ for an answer. He didn’t know how Dean really felt about him, but if the alpha was willing to risk killing himself to protect them, surely it meant he felt something towards Cas, right? Even if Dean didn’t love Cas the way Castiel loved Dean, he was sure he could still be happy living with him either way as Cas was sure there was more than a small amount of affection on Dean's behalf.
There was only one way to figure this out, and Cas knew - the sooner they talked this out, the sooner they could put this mess behind them and move on, one way or another.
§§§§§
When they returned home, Claire was very excited to show Dean the art she had created at daycare, three cotton balls taped to some paper with a few colorful scribbles, but they found the alpha crashed out on the couch, covered in some of the blankets Cas had left there.
“Sorry, Claire honey, Dean tried to stay awake for you, but he’s not very well at the moment,” Bobby explained to the disappointed little girl. “But you can tell me about your picture.”
Cas was grateful for the older man, and marveled how a childless alpha like him could be so wonderful and caring with small children.
Castiel put the lasagna in the oven and Bobby stayed and ate with them. Dean woke up long enough to join them for dinner, but didn’t linger much longer than to help Castiel with the dishes before taking himself off to bed, only after promising he would take the next three days off to recuperate fully.
Cas sighed when he realized he hadn’t managed to have that talk with Dean, but secretly he was sort of glad for that fact. Putting it off for another day, just meant one more day without having to deal with any of his own emotions.
§§§§§
Dean woke with a groan the next morning. He pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes as he tried to clear the fog from his brain. He knew there was a snowball's chance in hell of avoiding any kind of altercation with Cas and he took a moment to mentally prepare himself because he knew this was not going to go well. He wondered for a moment how low he would have to stoop to just hang out with Claire for the day and use her as a type of human shield against Castiel's attack. He sighed, knowing even if he did spend the next twelve hours coloring and drinking copious cups of imaginary tea, Cas was a parent and had that innate skill that allowed him to let Dean know exactly how displeased he was with him while young Claire would be none the wiser.
He rolled out of bed and steadied himself when he stood. When the room stopped spinning, he carefully moved to the bathroom for a shower then back to his room to pull on some sweats, a zip up hoodie, and some thick fluffy socks. He shuffled down to the kitchen and started the coffee machine. As he waited for the precious black liquid to drip through the filter, Dean considered trading in his ancient machine for one of those fancy Keurig thingies he’d seen advertised.
Finally, the coffee pot was filled and he poured a large mug of the amber liquid and savored the first sip. He was standing by the sink and staring out the window considering breakfast when he heard the front door open and turned to see Cas walking in.
“Oh, hey. I didn’t know you had gone out, I thought you must have still been in bed,” he said.
Cas scoffed slightly as he hung his coat.
“With a toddler? No such thing as a sleep in.”
“Right, so where is the munchkin?”
“Daycare. I told you yesterday, if she went well at her trial session, she’d be going one day a week,” Cas explained.
“Yeah, but I didn’t think today was going to be that day.” Truthfully, he had hoped it wouldn’t be, he had been still considering the human shield option. Guess that was out the window now. “Do you want a coffee?”
“Yes, I think a coffee would be a good idea.”
Cas gratefully accepted the mug of coffee and doctored it the way he liked it, then took a sip.
“Okay, so I’m just going to go and…”
“Sit down,” Cas interrupted him.
“Sit down, right, exactly what I was gonna say,” Dean said as he moved to the table.
“Have you had breakfast?” Cas asked.
“No, not yet,” Dean replied.
Castiel opened a cupboard over the counter then dropped a packet of chocolate chip cookies on the table in front of Dean and sat down opposite the alpha.
“Look Cas, I know exactly what you’re gonna say. I was dumb. Taking the suppressants was a reckless thing to do, and I agree, so I’ll just carry on the way I have been, and don’t worry, there’s insurance on the mortgage, so when I die it will be paid off and I’ll fix it with Sammy that you and Claire can stay here for as long as you want. So, you don’t gotta worry about that, okay? Right, good chat.” Dean pressed his hands against the table too and began to stand.
“That’s not what I was going to say at all,” Cas said, deceptively calm and clasping his hands together on the table top in front of him.
Dean sighed and sat back down, knowing a quick getaway would be too much to hope for.
“What I was going to say was, yeah, you’re right. Taking those suppressants when you knew what they would do to you was stupid, and reckless, and dumb, and idiotic.”
“Hey! I wouldn’t go that far!” Dean protested weakly, closing his mouth when Cas held up a hand.
“Why Dean? Why wouldn’t you have just told me about your condition?” Cas asked.
“I was afraid you’d think I was dangerous and wouldn’t move in,” Dean admitted quietly.
“Dean, you are an amazing guy. The way you take care of us down at the docks proves that. No one has ever shown me the type of kindness that you have. If you had just told me from the beginning we could have come to some type of arrangement.”
“Look, Cas, I told you before, that’s not why I offered you to stay here. I wanted this to be a safe space for you and Claire. This whole thing with me, is my problem. You don’t need to worry about it, I’ll manage.”
“You shouldn’t have to ‘manage’ it Dean,” Cas said, lifting his hands to add the air quotes. “I’m right here and willing to help you.”
“Jesus Cas!” Dean cursed, running his hands through his hair in frustration. “I don’t want your help!”
“Oh, but it was okay when I was working the streets?” Cas snapped back.
“That was different, we were both just doing what we needed to to survive!”
“Yeah Dean. It was different then, but things have changed for me! I have a good job, a safe place for Claire to grow up, and that’s because of you! You helped me, so why won’t you let me help you?”
“You don't owe me anything Cas! You’re not beholden to me for any of this!” Dean yelled, as he spread his arms wide, indicating around the room.
“That’s right! I’m not! I have full autonomy over my own life and you gave me that! You gave me the freedom to make my own decisions and this is the decision I’m making!” Cas said, frustration with the alpha opposite making him stand and slam his hand against the table top. “Do you know in all the time I spent selling myself on the streets, I only came once?” He asked, holding a single finger up in Dean's face. “One time! And that was with you! Out of all those time of being fucked in some dirty ally, you were the only time I enjoyed it! You treated me like a human, always! Like I meant something, something more than just a way to get off! You’ve given me everything I ever wanted! A house, a home. And I watch you with Claire and I fucking melt! You never complain when she’s being too rowdy, you get down on the floor and play with her, even after a long day at work! You speak to her calmly and help her work through her big emotions! You have been more of an alpha to her, to us, than her biological one ever was. You have become our family and I can’t risk losing that. I love you, Dean and I can’t risk losing you, I just can’t.”
Cas slumped back down in his seat, tears streaming down his face.
“You love me?” Dean asked, quietly.
“Yes,” Cas replied, wiping at the tears on his cheeks.
“Why?”
“Because you see me as me. I’m an abandoned omega, Dean, faulty, unlovable, unworthy for anything but a hole to use. You saw past all that. You saw me, always. You got me off the streets, you got me a respectable job, you helped me get Claire into day care.” And he had, signing the initial entrance forms as Claire’s supporting alpha. “Do you know what I did with the money from my first blowjob?”
Dean shook his head.
“I bought Claire a blanket from good will. That’s what I had to do to keep my child warm. Now though, if she so much as shivers, I have a whole cupboard full of warm blankets to choose from.” Cas stopped talking and stared at his hands.
“I bought Sammy food,” Dean said, making Cas finally look up at him. “I get it. I get the blankets, and the house, and the food, I do, but…my life is a shit show and I care too much about you and Claire to have you wading through it with me.”
“How deep are we talking here?” Cas asked. “Like, I can do knee deep, maybe to the waist, but I’ll be honest, my nipples can be kind of sensitive.”
Dean just stared at Cas open mouthed, staring at Castiel's completely neutral face, then after a moment, he burst out laughing; Cas joined him a few seconds later.
“Dean, I don’t see a shit show sitting in front of me. I see a man who loves his family, not just those related by blood. I see a man who stepped up and did what he needed to survive, to raise his brother, to keep him safe. I see a man who works his fingers to the bone to put that same brother through college and law school, debt free, so he could have the best life possible. I see a man who has so much love to give and deserves it all right back, and I want to be the one who gives it to you.” Castiel reached out and placed his hands over Deans on the table. “I love you, Dean, but if you don’t feel the same way, you can tell me and it’ll be okay. As long as I have your friendship, I will have everything I need.”
Dean stared at their hands for a moment.
“I can’t,” he said as he pulled his hand away. Castiel's face fell as he slowly withdrew his own hands, his scent turning broken. “I can’t tell you I don’t love you, because I do. But Cas, this thing I got, I don’t know what it’s gonna do, how it’s gonna go.” Dean swallowed and looked at Cas. “I’m getting worse. Are you sure you want to put yourself through that?”
Cas reached out and took Dean's hand again.
“Do you know what I keep thinking about?” He asked.
Dean shook his head.
“No, what?”
“That kiss, from the other day.”
Dean breathed out a small relieved laugh.
“Really?”
“Yeah, of course! It was my first real kiss. I really liked it,” Cas admitted shyly.
“Your first real kiss?”
“My mating was arranged, remember, so yes, my first real kiss with someone I really, truly wanted.”
Dean stood and walked around the table. He took Castiel's hand and gently tugged until the omega stood. He raised a hand and stroked Castiel’s cheek.
“Well then, perhaps we should see about giving you your third real kiss then,” he said softly.
“Third? What happened to the second?” Cas asked.
Dean leaned down and gently pressed his lips to Castiel’s, lingering for a few seconds then pulled slightly away.
“There, that’s two. Now are you ready for number three?”
Castiel surged forward and closed the few inches between their lips, meeting Deans to seize his third real kiss. Dean chuckled slightly and pulled Cas’s body flush against his, wrapping his left arm tightly around his waist and cradling the back of the omegas head with his right hand. Cas moaned quietly with happiness and this time, instead of pulling away, Dean deepened the kiss, his tongue licking across Castiel's lips until he parted them and allowed Dean access to his mouth.
They kissed and kissed and kissed right there beside Dean's dining table until Dean had to pull away. He placed his forehead against Castiel’s, just stayed still and tried to steady his breathing. He wanted more, so much more, but was afraid of scaring Cas away before they’d even had a chance.
Cas raised a hand and placed it against Dean's neck, his thumb brushing against his jaw.
“You’re having an episode, aren’t you?” He asked. “Don’t try to deny it, I can smell it on you.”
“You don’t have to worry about me, Cas, I’m fine. It’s not too bad yet,” Dean admitted.
Cas pulled back and took Dean’s hand. He looked up at the alpha with a cheeky smirk and a sparkle in his eye.
“Well, how about we go take care of it before it does get too bad?” He asked.
“Cas, you don't have too, besides, don’t you have work?” Dean replied.
“No, they switched my shift when I told them you’d been in the hospital so I could take care of you today.”
“Take care of me, huh?” Dean's mouth twitched as he tried to suppress a grin. Cas nodded, his own grin shining brightly. “And what time do we have to pick up Claire?”
“Not until three.”
“Well then, who am I to go against the boss's orders?”
His smile burst out brightly and when he pulled Cas in for another kiss, their teeth clacked together, causing them both to laugh. Finally pulling themselves together, they managed another sweet kiss as Dean began to lead them to the bedroom.
§§§§§
They removed each other’s clothing slowly, carefully, almost reverently. There was no desperate tearing of fabric as one might have expected, just slow and tender movements. Lying on the bed together, their cocks nestled beside each other as Dean explored Castiel's body, wanting to show the omega pleasure. To prove to him he was worthy of love and more than just a hole to be used.
Dean held Castiel's eyes as he pushed slowly in. Their palms slid together and fingers entwined as Cas tipped his head back and exhaled softly, accepting the alpha fully. Dean peppered the omegas exposed neck with soft kisses as he pulled back and pressed back in with a sensual roll of his hips.
They took their time, made love slowly, moving in unison to build each other’s pleasure. Cas lifted his legs and hooked his feet around the alphas thighs. Dean brought a hand down to help tilt Cas’s ass to achieve that perfect angle and when he brushed against Castiel’s prostate, the omega let out a quiet moan in pleasure.
They had somehow ended up the wrong way on the bed so Castiel had nothing to hold onto except Dean, and he wouldn’t want it any other way. One hand gripping the alphas arm, the other hand around the back of his neck as he drew him down for a searing kiss.
It was exquisite, their scents blending perfectly around them, helping Dean keep a clear head despite the burning need inside him. He could feel his knot growing, catching on Castiel’s rim more and more with each pass. He knew he wasn’t going to last much longer but wanted to bring Cas pleasure before seeking his own. Adjusting his weight to his left arm, Dean wrapped his right hand around Castiel’s cock, making him whimper..
“Shhh, it’s alright baby, I got you,” Dean murmured as he nuzzled at Castiel's neck.
Cas planted one foot on the mattress and rolled his hips up, driving Dean crazy as he pushed up into every thrust and stroke of his hand. Dean could feel his orgasm building, the burning need trying to consume him from the inside out. He lowered his head and sought out Castiel's mating gland, rubbing the tip of his nose across the sensitive skin, kissing and licking it. His thrusts became short and shallow when his knot threatened to catch and lock them together but Cas shook his head.
“Do it,” he pleaded. “I…I want to cum on your knot. Please, please knot me.”
Dean groaned and began thrusting inside him like a man possessed. He latched onto Castiel’s mating gland, pressing his teeth against it, not hard enough to break the skin, but enough that Cas could feel it. The moment his knot caught on Castiel's rim, Cas’s body locked up and he came with a cry, milking Dean’s knot and pulling the alpha right over the edge with him.
When Cas regained his senses, Dean was licking at his gland.
“One day I’m going to mark you here and the world will know you’re mine,” he whispered into Cas’s ear.
“I’m already yours,” Cas said with a smile as he reached up and stroked Dean's sweaty hair. “Don’t need the world to know it, as long as you do.”
“I love you Cas,” Dean said with a smile.
“I love you too.”
.
§§§§§
Cas and Dean applauded as they watched Claire run off stage with the rest of the six year olds.
“Great job on her costume,” Dean said as he slipped an arm around his mate's shoulders.
“I literally just stapled a couple of cardboard triangles to a head band and stuffed newspaper into some black stockings.” Cas replied with an eye roll.
“Still, she’s the cutest black cat up there. We probably should hold onto it just in case one of these guys needs it, though.”
The ‘these guys’ Dean was referring to were the triplets currently nestled safely in Castiel's womb. Dean lay a hand on the small swell of Castiel's stomach and leaned in to nuzzle at his neck, pulling some glares from those seated around them. While Cas may have given him an indulgent smile, he still gently pushed Dean's head away. Dean chuckled quietly and kissed Castiel on the cheek then looked down to where his hand rested over his pups, Cas’s hand laying on top of his, their matching gold rings sitting next to each other.
Dean leaned in to kiss Cas again. He didn’t give a shit about the people around them. He was happy and if they had a problem with that, well… then that was their problem.
It had been a hard fought journey to their mating, marriage and beyond. Six months after declaring their feelings, and four and a half months after Cas ‘officially’ moved into Dean’s room, Dean had gone for his six monthly checkup and the doctors were pleased to see the rise in his hormone levels had slowed and seemed to have leveled out. Six months after that, not only did the results show he had leveled out but they had actually begun to improve. Skeptical as Dean was, Castiel had insisted they celebrate, and maybe things got a little frisky in the bedroom, but in Dean’s defense, Castiel did bite Dean first.
One year after that, Dean was back in the doctor's office receiving the news that his hormone levels and other blood work results had come back lower than they had been in years, almost bordering normal. His feedback episodes had reduced dramatically, only having three in the previous twelve months.
The doctors were baffled and the only thing they could put it down to was having the constant presence of an omega around. Their best guess was the continuous exposure to the omegas scent and/or the bond of their mating had made Dean's condition go into some kind of remission. Sure other alphas with this illness had mates, but they were all being treated with large doses of suppressants, so any mating that might have occurred between them and an omega didn’t really change any of their results. There had been some minor damage to some of Dean’s organs, but nothing too serious and the specialists treating Dean assured him that as long as something catastrophic didn’t happen, like Cas suddenly dropping dead, Dean should be able to go on and live a long and relatively healthy life.
Dean proposed to Castiel as soon as they walked out of the hospital, and of course Cas said ‘yes’! A small intimate wedding later and here they were. Husband and husband, three beautiful new pups on the way, a new, larger house under construction and Dean’s official adoption of Claire in progress.
To say that Dean was happy would be an understatement. While initially Dean had saved Cas, well, Cas went and saved Dean right back, so if anyone has a problem with Dean kissing his beloved in public, then they were more than welcome to kiss his perky round ass!
