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Loki dodged a swipe headed for his neck, spinning around to slash at his assailant. The mutant deflected it, and after a short exchange of blows, they disengaged to circle each other.
Loki studied the mortal across from him, wondering what kind of mutant ability she had. Her shield-brother (who Loki had knocked unconscious moments prior) seemed to have the power to make select body parts of his incorporeal, which had proven to be a trait as bothersome as it had been novel.
Just as he wanted to advance on her again, he heard Jarvis's voice in his ear: "Loki, Sir urgently needs your assistance. He is injured and I'm afraid I can't access the suit"; clearly meaning for him to teleport to Anthony.
Loki's blood froze in his veins, and his momentary lack of attention nearly earned him a stab to the gut.
If Jarvis couldn't access the armor, it likely wasn't functional. Which meant that Anthony was not only injured, he also had neither means of attack nor defense.
He had to leave immediately.
Loki dropped his glamour on one hand, intercepted his opponent's next blow with it and bent down to quickly freeze the woman's arm and weapon to the ground. Though it might not hold her for long, it would buy Loki valuable time.
He put a little distance between them and concentrated on the locator spell on Anthony. A few moments later, he had ascertained his location, and used his seidr to move towards him.
Loki appeared a short stretch from Anthony's prone form. His friend's armor appeared intact, if only structurally – it didn't seem to be in working order; lights darkened except for the reactor on his chest. Another mutant (judging by the specific combat attire) was standing next to Anthony and prodding him with a foot, gun aimed down at his head.
Ready to fire if Anthony lifted his faceplate.
A fissure of rage ran through Loki, cracking his composure and filling him with the urge to slaughter. To burn.
"You dare!" Snarling, he advanced on the man.
The enemy's head snapped up and he raised his arm to aim at Loki's chest.
With a twitch of his wrist, Loki's left vambrace formed into a small shield, and he guarded his chest just in time for two bullets to reflect off of it. The mortal aimed at his head instead and Loki raised the shield higher, hearing and feeling the impact of another bullet a moment after.
Then, he was upon the other, pushing away his weapon arm to get up close and plunge a dagger into his heart.
His enemy let out a surprised grunt, eyes wide and terrified. Good. Loki grinned at him shortly, baring his teeth even as the hot rage in his veins started to cool; overtaken by concern. Not wasting a moment more, Loki kicked the man off his dagger, and turned to his friend.
"Anthony?" he called out worriedly.
Instead of an answer from his friend, there was a groan, making his eyes dart towards its source: a woman lying on the street a few dozen strides away, wearing their enemies' uniform. She was holding her head and sitting up slowly, likely having been knocked down by Anthony.
Loki quickly summoned a spear and threw it. The weapon impaled her, preventing her back from fully hitting the ground again. The mortal stared down at it in mute surprise, then up at him; motionless but for a few twitches.
Judging her to not be a threat anymore, and spotting no others in the vicinity save for two unmoving mutants in nets, he turned towards Anthony again. He recalled the spear with a small gesture – ignoring the sound of the woman's upper body and head impacting the street – and moved it into his pocket dimension.
"Anthony?" he asked, louder this time.
Still no answer.
Worry was quickly taking hold of Loki. He went to his knees, sweeping his gaze across his friend's armor as he did, and noticed what looked like a small hole in the front.
It seemed like something had penetrated it – likely the cause of the injury Jarvis had mentioned.
For lack of another option, Loki moved the armor's faceplate into his pocket dimension; and his heart stilled at the sight before him.
Anthony's eyes were closed, his features slack and lifeless.
Ice spread through Loki's veins from his suddenly frozen heart, chilling his entire body.
No. This couldn't be it.
Loki held up his clean hand to check for Anthony's breathing, and relief flooded his chest when he felt it on his skin like a light, merciful caress. He exhaled shakily.
Anthony was alive.
Loki shook himself.
But he was still injured.
The god used his hands to support his friend's head and back, then moved the armor into his dimension.
Again, he felt the cold take hold of his chest. His breathing hitched at the state of Anthony's clothing and the wetness on his hand supporting his friend's back.
There was so much blood.
Now uncontained by the armor, it freely spread on the ground, forming a puddle beneath Anthony. Whatever it was must've run through him, and now Anthony's blood was soaking the front and back of his clothing. Spilling out and dying the ground red.
The sight near paralyzed Loki. For a moment, he could only stare numbly, body still with shock and insides contorting in fear.
Norns, why couldn't he heal.
There had been a number of times in the past where Loki had wished he hadn't passed over that discipline of magic. But he had never felt it as keenly as he did now – shame and regret spiking his heart, making him pained at how utterly useless he was.
Why hadn't he learned?
Norns, he had been such a fool.
–but that wasn't helping now. Loki had to tend to his friend's wound, one way or another.
Again, Loki swept a quick glance over their surroundings. Spotting no threat, he gently lifted Anthony up a little, willed his seidr to move a clean quilt under him, then laid him down on it. Using both hands to grasp and pull up the fabric sticking to Anthony's front, he carefully ripped it apart to see the wound underneath.
It was a small, perfectly circular hole – Loki couldn't remember seeing anything like it before. It must've been caused by a mutation, the part of his mind not numbed by fear told him. It couldn't have been magic – unless it had been a very unusual or very powerful spell, it wouldn't have bypassed Loki's enchantments on the armor.
He blankly watched the blood ooze out of it for a moment, his chest seizing at his own powerlessness. Not only could he not heal it, he also had no idea how bad an injury this was for a mortal.
"Loki?" it came out of his earpiece, Jarvis's voice bringing him back to himself and reminding him that luckily, there was someone who most likely did have an idea.
He summoned Jarvis's sphere to levitate in midair and made his seidr push the button that would let the intelligence access it. The light signaling its activation blinked on.
"Jarvis," Loki forced out, carefully keeping his voice even, "how bad is it?"
The sphere's camera centered on Anthony, and Jarvis's voice sounded at once, uncharacteristically short: "Sir needs immediate emergency care. Take him here," he finished, projecting a set of coordinates into the air.
Loki's heart became complete ice.
Though they had practiced him teleporting to specific coordinates before, he hadn't managed to perfect it yet. And Jarvis would never rely on an unsure method where it concerned his creator's well-being, unless there was no other option. This had to be an injury so grave that Anthony couldn't wait for mortal means of transportation. His life or death would likely be decided within minutes.
Cursing himself for having wasted precious time, Loki used his seidr to press folded cloths to the wounds on Anthony's front and back, then carefully picked him up along with the blood-soaked quilt.
He stood and burned the coordinates into his mind, then oriented himself.
Loki focused on the exact place where he wanted to appear, and prayed to the Norns for success. He formed the spell with his seidr, taking the sphere and Anthony in his arms with him.
After a moment of darkness, his eyes registered a busy room full of both injured and uninjured people and healers clothed in white – doctors. Or nurses?
His arrival caused quite an upheaval, and he silenced the mortals with a shout, demanding help for Anthony. After a few torturous moments of stillness all around, another healer appeared, ordering him to follow her.
Loki complied and matched her quick stride while trying not to jostle Anthony too much. He looked down at his unconscious friend and found his vision blurring with tears, chest throbbing in pain.
Please, he spoke to whoever would listen.
Please don't take him from me.
They quickly arrived in front of a room that looked to be for treatment, a few other healers having appeared from someplace. The one he had followed told him to put Anthony on the cot that was ready just in front of the doors, and he laid him down on it.
They wheeled the cot inside, calling out incomprehensible things to each other. Loki instinctively made to follow but was stopped by the one that had first found him. Again, he complied, understanding that he would only be a distraction and nuisance for the healers working to keep Anthony alive.
The closing doors soon blocked his gaze, and Loki looked on as his friend, his heart disappeared. For it felt as if his very heart had been ripped out with Anthony's departure from his own presence. He numbly stared at the doors.
Loki couldn't feel the ice in his chest anymore. Neither was it painful.
All he felt was ... hollow.
He slowly moved to the side and let himself collapse against a wall. The place where his heart would've been felt like a yawning chasm. Empty, and hollow, and threatening to swallow his entire being whole.
He gazed down at his bloody hands. Most of the blood was Anthony's. For some reason, Loki couldn't bring himself to clean them.
He blinked, remembering the puddle of blood he had simply left on the ground. Cursing once again, he teleported back and cleaned it, moving the blood into a container in his pocket dimension. Although Midgard had comparatively less mages, it wouldn't do to give them material to use against Anthony.
Should he survive, his treacherous mind whispered.
Loki gritted his teeth, and teleported back again.
Anthony would survive.
He had to.
Loki went towards what looked like a cross between a row of chairs and a bench, and sat down heavily.
He stared unseeingly at the opposite wall.
...
Norns, he had been complacent.
Loki had hemmed and hawed, biding his time while thinking about how to ask Anthony to accept the Apple of Idunn, which would strengthen his body and life force.
He had hesitated time and time again, one day thinking his friend might accept it, another day unsure whether he would even consider doing so.
All the while forgetting what it meant that Anthony was, in fact, mortal. That he could die at a moment's notice, without Loki having the power to stop it. Loki might not even have known, if it hadn't been for Jarvis. Anthony would've bled to death in his own armor, with Loki off somewhere none the wiser.
He gritted his teeth, swallowing down the pitiful whine that wanted to escape him at the thought. He blinked to clear his vision, only to find it blurring anew within a scant few moments.
Maybe he should just present the Apple to Anthony.
Artlessly hand it to him, informing him of its effects.
Tell him to accept it.
Beg him.
Please.
(Please, don't leave me.)
...
There he sat, waiting and fearing. Praying that the glimpse he had gotten of Anthony's face before the doors had closed hadn't been the last time Loki would have seen him.
"Loki?" a voice gently asked from his side.
He turned his head, eyes landing on the face of Ms. Potts. She was sat next to him, an expression of concern on her face.
He simply stared at her.
"Are you alright?" she asked him carefully.
He wasn't sure he had heard that right.
"Excuse me?" he blankly replied. Had she just asked Loki whether he was alright when it was Anthony whose very life was in danger?
Apparently some of that must've shown on his face, for a look of understanding entered her eyes. She smiled just a little, though it didn't look joyful at all. Her gaze moved towards his bloody hands lying palms up on his legs, then came to rest on his middle.
"You're injured," she told him.
Loki looked down at himself. Indeed, there was a cut towards the side of his waist, bloodying his armor. He looked up at her again.
"Ah," he eloquently replied.
Her concern seemed to deepen, though she looked somewhat amused as well. Standing up, she motioned for him to follow her actions. "Come on, let's get you looked at."
Loki stared up at her.
"No. I... don't want to leave," he said. And he wouldn't. Not until he had received news of Anthony.
Her eyes upon him softened, and she hesitated before asking him, "Are you sure you'll be alright?"
"Yes," he replied. His body certainly would. His heart? Well, that was another matter entirely.
"Okay," she finally conceded. Then she signaled again for him to stand up and follow her.
He looked at her uncomprehendingly.
"Tony is being operated on somewhere else. We'll wait there," she told him.
Why hadn't she said so sooner.
He stood immediately. "Lead the way."
She gazed at him assessingly, then sighed. "Tony told me you can use magic to clean. A sterile and clean environment is important in hospitals," she admonished him gently, pointedly looking at his hands and bloodied armor.
Loki reluctantly used his seidr to follow her wishes, letting it clean him in a wave from his head downwards. He put a bandage on his cut and changed into casual clothing as he did.
"Much better," Ms. Potts commented. "And ... thank you," she finished, the gratitude mixed with concern in her eyes telling him exactly what she was referring to.
"Of course," Loki responded, meaning it. He would always come to Anthony's aid. No matter what.
Hoping they were ready to go now, he looked at her.
"Aren't you going to take Jarvis with you?" she asked him with a small smile.
Loki blinked at her, realizing that he had completely forgotten the sphere.
Norns.
Before he could leave in search of it, she turned her head a little to point to the left of Loki. With a look to the floor, she said, "There."
He turned to follow her gaze and sure enough, there the sphere sat, next to where he had waited.
Loki floated it up and took it in hand. He looked down into the camera that was focused on him. "Apologies," he directed at Jarvis.
"No harm done, Loki," the intelligence responded, tone vaguely amused. "Now, shall we?" Jarvis asked.
They walked together, and after coming to a stop in front of another room with closed double doors, sat down near the entrance.
Soon, they were joined by Hogan, and a while later by Rhodes, who had been visiting and fought today as well.
They sat and waited in silence, the other three leaving at times for one reason or another.
Loki just sat and stared, gaze and heart empty.
After an amount of time he could've only described as 'an eternity', the doors opened and a healer came towards them.
The other three stood up and Loki quickly followed suit, body tense in fearful anticipation.
The healer opened by telling them that the surgery had been successful, and that they would monitor Anthony for a while more.
Loki breathed out a shaky sigh of relief, knees dangerously close to buckling. It felt like a burden had been lifted from him. His heart thawed and started beating again, warming his body and making him come alive once more.
The healer went on to say that Anthony had been very lucky to have received emergency care so quickly, and commended whoever had brought him so fast for likely saving his life.
Loki saw the other three pale at that. He was a tad surprised. It seemed Jarvis hadn't told them?
The healer informed them that they could see Anthony after he had been brought to his room, and they exchanged a few words more, thanking him.
After that, they were left alone, and Ms. Potts and Rhodes embraced each other, their relief and joy obvious.
Loki could certainly relate.
Ms. Potts went on to hug Hogan, and Rhodes turned to him.
"Can I hug you?" Anthony's closest friend asked him, to Loki's surprise.
Loki looked at him for a moment, then answered, "I suppose."
Rhodes's arms came around his body and he embraced Loki, holding him tight. "Thank you," Rhodes whispered, voice thick with relief and … gratitude?
The god brought up one arm to return the embrace, and told the man, "You should thank Jarvis as well. I wouldn't have known were it not for him."
"I will," Rhodes answered, a note of amusement having entered his voice. He patted Loki on the back, the specific motion of it strangely reminiscent of Anthony.
He felt a small stab of jealousy. Had the both of them been so close that at some point, their manners of embracing people had begun to resemble each other? Or, considering their ages, had Anthony perhaps learned it from Rhodes?
The man stepped back, only to be replaced by Ms. Potts. "Me too," she told him, and spread her arms in a wordless question.
Loki acquiesced with a light nod, and she embraced him. After a moment, she moved back again and thanked him as well.
"It's really good to know that Tony has someone like you out there," she told him with a smile, expression a cross of relief, concern and fond affection for Anthony.
"I'm not sure I follow," he said. Usually, 'someone like you' wasn't meant positively when referring to him.
Rhodes jumped in from where he stood next to Hogan with an arm around his shoulder. "You know, someone who can and will help protect Tony when something inevitably goes to shit. I worry about him, and him having a friend like you on the team actually... really helps. Thank you," he repeated, stepping closer again and finishing his statement with a grasp and light squeeze of Loki's upper arm.
Loki blinked at him, unsure what to say.
"I agree," Hogan gruffly added. The god eyed him, somewhat surprised.
...was the mortal about to ask for a hug as well?
He didn't. Rather, he nodded at Loki, who inclined his head in turn.
"Really, I just ... thank you," Ms. Potts said, making Loki look at her again. "We all know what it's like to worry about Tony, but it's rare we can actually do something about it. You're great. And welcome to the club," she told him with a smile, and a twinkle in her eyes.
Did that mean he had been accepted into the circle of Anthony's closest friends? A part of him preened at the thought. Another part... felt dread.
Still, he politely responded, "Thank you, Ms. Potts."
Her smile widened and she said, "Please, call me Pepper."
Which was a fitting nickname indeed, though he certainly hadn't expected today to develop like it had. "Of course... Pepper."
"And me Rhodey," Rhodes grinned.
Loki eyed him. That was a little... "James," he said.
"Sure," the other responded easily.
Pepper and James turned to look at Hogan, who made a reluctant face and gruffly added, "I guess you can call me Happy."
Loki's lips twitched at the nickname. "Would you like that?" he inquired, brows raised a little.
"No," came the immediate answer.
Rhodes let out a laugh, and Ms. Potts – he couldn't quite bring himself to think of them by their nicknames yet after all – chuckled. Loki himself smiled at the man, and said, "Hogan it is"; the other's face showing clear relief at his answer.
They broke out in easy conversation, the atmosphere loosened and much improved after getting the positive news. Loki contributed here and there, though he had to expend a lot of effort to keep the sinking of his heart from showing on his face.
These three had been at Anthony's side for far longer than he had. They clearly treasured Anthony, as was apparent in the noticeable change of their attitude towards Loki from lukewarm to quite friendly indeed after he had helped save him.
And as they treasured him, so would Anthony undoubtedly treasure them.
Why hadn't he thought of this before?
Anthony might be curious beyond belief but would that curiosity be enough to make him accept the Apple, when it would lead to him outliving his friends? When it would leave him alone in the end – spare Loki, who couldn't imagine voluntarily leaving Anthony – cursed to see near everyone he knew die long before he would?
The god's insides churned in shame at his own selfishness, and idiocy. How had he ever believed there was a chance that Anthony might accept the Apple?
His chest throbbed in pain, and his eyes stung with repressed tears, devastation threatening to shatter his already cracked heart.
There wasn't.
Loki followed the three to Anthony's room, heart beginning to beat faster in anticipation.
Rhodes knocked, then entered without awaiting an answer. Apparently the two friends shared a lack of manners as well. As he looked at Ms. Potts disappearing into the room too, he heard Rhodes call out to Anthony, and make a rather ... questionable joke.
Loki stopped, feeling he needed a moment to prepare himself to keep any of the dread and sorrow that had enveloped him from his face. It might've been alright with Anthony's friends as they didn't know him too well, but Anthony himself... Loki had spent enough time with him to know that he had to be more careful.
Loki breathed deeply, closing his eyes and trying to calm his emotions. After a moment, he opened them again, his gaze landing on Hogan, who was just putting his phone back into his pocket. With a questioning look to him, the man turned to go inside, and Loki followed after him, floating Jarvis's sphere onto a chair.
He was glad he had taken the opportunity to calm himself somewhat, as his heart was immediately hit with another wave of grief and shame. Ms. Potts had just moved back from Anthony, who was looking up at her and Rhodes in affection. Both of them returned his gaze, and it was clear as day that they cherished each other.
That they loved him, and that Anthony loved them in turn.
And though Loki loved him as well, he had no right to come between them.
He almost froze in his motions, but managed to continue walking.
And there it was.
He loved Anthony.
At last, Loki's careful avoidance of the exact nature of his feelings for his friend had proven useless. The knowledge dawned on him as inevitable as a Midgardian sunrise, and though it did bring some warmth, it doomed him all the same.
His chest throbbed in pain, soothed a little as Anthony's eyes found him and he smiled at Loki, warmth and affection in his gaze. The god's chest heated, and he was helpless against the answering smile spreading on his own lips.
He loved Anthony.
And how could he not?
Anthony was ... he was perfect.
He was magnificent.
Loki vaguely registered Anthony thanking him, and managed to reply something, he was sure.
Norns, he couldn't stop looking at him.
Loki was drinking in the sight of his friend, unable to avert his eyes. Anthony half sat on the bed, legs straight and upper body reclined, his head supported by a pillow. He looked exhausted, and nowhere near as spirited as he usually was, but he was there.
He was alive.
A sudden wave of relief almost buckled Loki's knees again.
Anthony joked about not having received a hug from him and Hogan, who left after a comment and glance over the man's body.
Then Anthony looked at him, expression expectant and questioning.
Loki's heart burst with affection, bleeding warmth into the rest of his chest, and spreading it throughout his whole body. He simply loved this man.
Loki stepped up to the bed and carefully held him. He loved how Anthony's soft hair felt under his hand, the way his friend turned into his touch, and how solid his shoulder was in his grasp.
And he had almost lost him.
Belated fear struck him once again, accompanied by overwhelming relief.
"I'm glad you're alive, Anthony," Loki told him. And he was. He couldn't even begin to describe how much.
After another few moments that Loki savoured as best he could, he let go of his friend, and made to straighten up again. His eyes found Anthony's, and suddenly his mind blanked, body stilling along with it.
...
"Pardon?" Loki asked uncomprehendingly.
...
Had Anthony just asked to court him?
Loki stared at his friend, utterly lost.
Anthony's gaze darted to the side, and Loki dimly noticed the others leaving. Still, he couldn't bring himself to look away. Which certainly wasn't helped by what he had just heard – or probably not heard, but rather imagined.
Norns, had the last few hours been harrowing enough on his mind that it would see fit to produce illusions of what he wanted to hear?
Finally, Anthony's eyes found his again, and Anthony went on to explain that he had in fact meant courting, and things that came with it, like kissing and laying with each other.
How Loki wished.
He stared at his friend in astonishment. This was ... he should maybe leave and check his mind for general health and possible spells placed on it.
"What?" Loki asked.
He felt kind of sorry for the way his lack of understanding seemed to discomfit Anthony. But not too sorry either. Anthony wasn't the one being tortured by his own mind right now, showing him his dreams with a wake mind.
His friend elaborated on top of that, telling him he wanted Loki, that he was sorry for asking because he would die relatively soon but didn't want to – had already regretted it, and that he at least wanted to try. That he really liked Loki, and wanted to be with him.
Loki continued staring at Anthony, mute in his surprise.
This ... what?
His mind was of no help.
Loki simply stood there, eyes fixed on his friend, head as empty as his heart had been hours prior, when he had been uncertain of Anthony's life.
He watched as his friend got increasingly uncomfortable with the silence, averting his eyes but looking back at Loki periodically.
Finally, it seemed Anthony couldn't take it anymore, and made to rescind his confession, assuring Loki he didn't have to worry and that they could remain friends, with an expression on his face that seemed ... nervous.
Anthony Stark, nervous.
Loki hadn't even known what that looked like on his friend's face.
That was what finally returned him to his senses. A sliver of doubt beginning to creep into his certainty that he had in fact imagined all of this, he took Anthony's hand and interrupted his somewhat agitated speech.
He didn't like seeing his friend anxious, and if Anthony had actually said all of those things... he didn't want him to take them back.
Though Loki was reasonably certain that this couldn't exactly be real. But on the slight chance it was... well.
Loki allowed himself to hope a little, feeling abashed and almost ashamed at the same time. By the Nine, this would hurt once he found whatever was wrong with him and received proof of this being an illusion.
Still, he told Anthony he would think on it, and his friend seemed content with that. He watched Loki hesitantly, and carefully asked whether they would remain friends regardless.
Of course they would.
Loki had no difficulties reassuring his friend of that. He would certainly uphold their friendship, even as the ashes of the small hope he had allowed himself would lay heavily on his heart.
Anthony's head fell back in relief, then snapped back up, and he winced.
Worry flared up again, and Loki immediately stepped closer. "Are you alright?"
Anthony reassured him that it was just the medicine for pain relief wearing off, and then proceeded to actively not take any more.
What was it with this man and his lack of self-preservation?
They stared at each other for a moment, while Loki thought about how to persuade Anthony. He didn't want him to be in pain.
Having been about to shift anyway, he simply decided to give it a try. Loki changed into a cat, appearing next to Anthony's hand that held the control for the pain relief. His friend's eyes on him, he slowly laid down and extended a paw to place it on the thumb resting on the device's button. He looked up at Anthony, widening his eyes to make himself appear more innocent.
Anthony chuckled, seeming amused by his actions. "And what are you doing there?" he asked with a smile on his face.
Loki opened his eyes even wider, and kept staring when Anthony's gaze showed increasing indecision the longer it went on.
"Fine," his friend eventually relented, and pressed the button. Loki sat up, feeling triumphant. It was good to know that the 'puppy eyes' technique seemed to work on Anthony as well. He had certainly employed it on Loki often enough.
With that matter settled, Loki made his way towards his friend's head, Anthony's gaze following him. Apparently the frequency of a cat's purr was conducive to healing, and considering his need for some time to quietly think and examine himself with his seidr, he figured it would be great to combine the two.
Anthony watched him until Loki pushed his face forward with a paw, then followed Loki's wishes and rested his head.
The god settled on the pillow, leaning against the other a little. Without Anthony's distracting gaze on him, he could finally begin to examine his mind and ascertain whether what he heard had been real or not.
His friend's hair felt nice against him, and although there was a much too strong, strangely sterile note to both Anthony's and the room's scents, he could still smell his friend underneath it, making him relax further.
He started purring, for once actively engaging the muscles instead of letting it come naturally.
Slowly, Anthony's breaths lengthened, and after a while he seemed to have fallen asleep.
Loki lay there, using his seidr to examine himself. He went through multiple ways of assessing one's state and numerous inspections for different possible spells placed on him.
Nothing.
Feeling somewhat shaken, he stared down at Anthony in disbelief. His hope grew.
No. Maybe it was Anthony who had a spell on him.
Loki employed various scans on his friend, and once again found no results. His heart began to beat faster. Had Anthony actually confessed to him?
Truly?
Norns, I beg you.
Hope bloomed in his chest, and a first bud of elation carefully sprouted in his heart.
He still couldn't be certain though. Wanting more confirmation, he summoned the sphere that had been silently sitting on a chair onto the one closest to him.
Loki turned his head and wrote illusory words in the air, at a place that Anthony couldn't see should he awaken. He didn't exactly want him to witness this.
"Jarvis?"
The intelligence seemed to understand, centering his camera on the word and projecting an answer into the air below Loki's question: "Yes?"
"Did you hear Anthony confessing to me?"
"I did, indeed."
Jarvis had witnessed it.
Loki lay there, stunned. Generally, Jarvis was harder to fool with illusions than living beings were, and he also wouldn't lie to him.
Which meant ... Anthony had actually said it.
Loki's mind blanked again.
...
This certainly didn't feel real though. Had he perhaps died and gone to a kind of afterlife that showed him his deepest wishes fulfilled? Or was this simply a dream?
If it was, Loki didn't really want to go back to reality.
But then, he had never dreamed of this before. After months of even his subconscious being certain that there was no chance his feelings would ever be requited, he somehow doubted that it would just completely overturn that notion and show him Anthony confessing to him, nervous even about the result.
This simply made no sense.
Though he was beginning to think that it was real.
But it made no sense.
Unsure what exactly to say, he settled for "I don't understand."
"Sir has exhibited signs of romantic attraction to you for months now."
He what? Loki certainly had eyes, and he had never seen it. It made him doubt Jarvis's observational abilities a little.
Seeming to sense his doubts, the intelligence added, "As have you for him."
Loki felt somewhat mortified. It seemed he hadn't hidden himself well enough.
...though that did alleviate his doubts about Jarvis's abilities to some extent. If he had noticed Loki's feelings even as he had tried to hide them, then the likelihood of him being correct about his creator was even higher, given that he had known and observed him for much longer.
So that meant... Anthony wanted to be with him. Romantically.
Anthony wanted to kiss him, and bed him, and be his courted.
Norns.
The bud of elation burst and joy surged through his heart, rolling over its walls and flooding him entirely.
Loki wanted to grin, laugh out his happiness for all the world to hear, but found his facial muscles wholly inadequate for the task. Instead, his eyes narrowed in pleasure, and his purr increased in volume to such a degree, he was sure it could be heard from outside the door.
He could scarcely believe it.
But he did.
Anthony had confessed to him. Loki's feelings weren't unrequited. He would be able to get to know Anthony as a lover, as a partner.
His small body could barely contain his delight, and he found it hard to stay still. Not wanting to disturb Anthony's rest, he forced himself to stay in place, though he couldn't help his tail swishing about and quivering in excitement.
Anthony had confessed to him! his mind bellowed. It didn't matter that he had said 'like' to Loki's love. Maybe that would develop with time. Maybe it wouldn't. Loki was fine with that – even just the possibility sent his heart into spirals of glee.
He felt like he was about to burst at his seams. Maybe screaming it out would help. But he couldn't. He settled for expressing it using his illusory script, projecting an "AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH" into the air, followed by a single ":D".
Jarvis replied, "I am pleased to see your relationship progressing." Then the intelligence added something as well: ":)".
Loki felt another bolt of joy run through him. That meant Jarvis approved of him courting Anthony. "I am glad to hear that." he wrote back, and was he trembling? He might have been.
Loki didn't know what to do with all of the happiness coursing through his body. He couldn't wait for Anthony to wake up so he could give him his answer. He stilled for a moment. Thinking over when to tell him, Loki decided to wait until tomorrow, even if Anthony awoke earlier than that. He wanted him to be well rested for that conversation.
Tomorrow.
Norns, Anthony would be his courted starting tomorrow!
His tail swished wildly again.
Suddenly the Apple came to mind, making him freeze for a moment.
No, that was... even if they were together, that didn't mean Anthony would want to eventually leave his friends and his realm behind.
But people moved to different realms, changed their ways of life, and did all kinds of things for their spouses all the time.
Their spouses.
Bor and his brats, Loki was getting ahead of himself. He had to slow down.
He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself.
No, he didn't dare to offer Anthony the Apple. Not now, and maybe ... not for years to come, he thought, pained. He didn't want to overwhelm Anthony, and scare him away. Loki would be careful.
The dampening of his mood barely lasted for a few moments more before Loki's emotions were running high again.
Anthony would be his beloved, not in the secrecy of Loki's heart, but in reality.
This incredible, astonishing man had feelings for him. Desired, wanted him, Loki.
Anthony and Loki.
He liked the sound of that.
Floating on the waves of joy flowing through him, Loki lay there, willing the time to pass more quickly.
He couldn't wait for tomorrow to arrive.