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Allison wasn’t really sure what was going on between her and Scott anymore. She’d been so sure they were over for good when they’d broken up again a week before, and yet there she was, after spending almost an hour driving around, standing on his front porch, because nowhere else felt quite right.
“Want to watch a movie?” She asked when Scott opened the door, dressed in a pair of soft pajama pants and a t-shirt that she was pretty sure belonged to Stiles.
“Sure,” he said, smiling in the gentle way that he reserved just for her. Her heart may or may not have skipped a beat, but she pushed the feeling away and followed him into the house.
They pulled up Netflix on his laptop, side by side in his bed, and started the first movie they saw. It didn’t matter, because all Allison could focus on was the warmth of Scott beside her, the way their thighs were pressed together, the laptop sitting half on each of them.
They made it twenty minutes before the movie was forgotten completely, the laptop shoved aside, Scott’s hand under Allison’s shirt and his soft pajama pants somewhere on the other side of the room.
They weren’t dating, and this wasn’t getting back together - they both knew that. Allison was pretty sure that he knew she was sleeping with Lydia too, and besides, she knew he was sleeping with Stiles whenever Stiles wasn’t sleeping with Malia or Jackson. They were just good friends, who sometimes ended up in bed together. It didn’t matter that it happened every time they were alone. Allison was nothing if not a creature of habit.
***
“Have you ever slept with Scott?” Allison asked one night, when Lydia was naked beside her, her head pillowed on Allison’s chest, strawberry blonde hair fanned out around her like a halo.
“I don’t think he wants to.”
“Everyone wants to if it’s with you,” said Allison with a laugh.
“Even if he did though,” murmured Lydia, trailing her fingers down Allison’s stomach. “I feel like it would just..change things, you know?”
Allison didn’t know, but she pretended she did. “Sure,” she said, running her fingers through Lydia’s hair. “You want to go for round four?”
Lydia laughed, free and unashamed and loud, a side of her that Allison so rarely got to see, and Allison felt her stomach flutter. She tried to ignore it. It felt like a problem just waiting to happen.
“Maybe in the morning,” said Lydia, pressing a soft kiss to Allison’s nipple, giggling as Allison sucked in a surprised breath. “I’m too tired right now.”
Allison smiled, kissing the top of Lydia’s head and continuing to run her fingers through her hair, letting her eyes fall closed.
***
Stiles was up and getting dressed before Allison had even finished coming down. “You leaving already?” She asked, sitting up and pushing her hair out of her face. “We could watch a movie.”
“Nah, I’ve got homework. Thanks though. This was fun.”
Allison laughed. “Anytime.”
Stiles grinned back. “I guess that’s kind of a weird thing to say, isn’t it?”
“It’s whatever,” said Allison, suddenly feeling strangely self conscious, pulling the sheet up to cover her chest. “It’s not like we’re dating. Speaking of, why didn’t you just call Malia? We haven’t done this since... before she came to town.”
Stiles blushed. “I’m not dating Malia.”
“Aren’t you?”
“No,” said Stiles, frowning. “And even if I wanted to be, she’s on a date with Jackson right now.”
“So?” asked Allison with a shrug. “Not that I didn’t enjoy this or anything, but... You’re pretty clearly in love with both of them.”
“I’ll call them when you call Lydia and Scott.”
“I’m not-” spluttered Allison. “We’re just- That’s not the same. They’re not even- stop deflecting!”
“Right,” said Stiles, smirking. “Same time next week?”
“Yeah, okay.”
***
Allison felt her love for Scott in her chest, solid and warm and dependable, like slipping into bed at the end of a long day. She felt her love for Lydia in her stomach, sweet and comforting and familiar, like a cup of her mother’s hot chocolate on a snowy day. She couldn’t make herself pick one, and she didn’t want to.
***
Allison started noticing things slowly. First it was Scott and Lydia’s fingers brushing as they both tried to point at something in a book they were reading on kelpies, and both of them pulling away and blushing. Then it was Scott mentioning that he liked the smell of Jasmine and Lydia buying new perfume, or Lydia mentioning that green was her favorite color and Scott suddenly wearing a lot more green. They weren’t even subtle about it - not that Scott and Allison ever had been, but really, Allison thought, these two should have more tact, considering how easily they were both replacing her with each other. Finally, she understood what Lydia meant when she said that sleeping with Scott would change things. Because once she did, there was no going back.
Allison almost hoped they’d just get it over with so she could move on.
“Have you told them yet?” asked Stiles, shutting Allison’s bedroom door behind him and pulling off his shirt.
“Told who what?” asked Allison, not looking up from her chemistry textbook, pretending she didn’t know what he was talking about, didn’t know why he was there. She’d gotten much better at pretending lately.
“You know exactly who and what,” said Stiles. He was unbuttoning his pants now, stumbling as he pulled them off.
“Have you told Malia and Jackson?” asked Allison, finally shutting her book and pulling her own shirt over her head. She hadn’t bothered putting on a bra when she’d gotten out of her shower after school, and Stiles’ eyes lingered on her bare chest for a moment before he spoke again.
“I don’t have anything to tell them,” he said, but he didn’t even sound like he was convincing himself.
“Right,” said Allison, slipping out of her sweatpants, leaving her clad only in a pair of tiny black panties. “Get on the bed.”
Stiles followed her instructions, and after that, they didn’t talk at all.
***
For the first time, Allison didn’t spend the night at Scott’s. She’d been there less often lately, anyways, choosing instead to spend her time with Stiles, because she knew with him she didn’t have to worry about ruining the sex with feelings. Scott had called her, though, asked her in that voice that she’d never been able to resist to come watch a movie, and Allison was nothing if not a creature of habit.
“Good movie,” she said afterwards, breath heavy and face hot.
“Five stars,” said Scott. “Totally worth watching. One of my favorites, really.”
Allison knew it was just a joke, but she couldn’t stop her heart from speeding up at his words. They were done for good this time, though, they’d agreed on it.They knew there was something that didn’t work between them, something that wasn’t quite right, and there was no point trying again. If it hadn’t worked the first three times, there was no reason to think it would now.
“I have to go,” she said, before she could give herself time to second guess it.
“Oh,” said Scott sadly, and Allison almost gave up and said she was kidding. “I was hoping you could stay. Maybe watch another movie.” He paused. “Or, you know, have sex again.”
Allison laughed, but she forced herself to sit up. “Sorry, I promised my dad I’d be home tonight. Maybe some other time.”
When Allison got home, the apartment was cold and empty and all she wanted to do was go back to Scott’s. She forced herself to go to bed alone instead, but her sheets were cold, and her blankets felt thinner and less substantial than usual.
***
Stiles finally told Jackson and Malia. Technically, Stiles and Jackson got in a fight, and Stiles kissed Jackson in a fit of frustration and then was forced to explain himself, but Allison was pretty sure that it still counted. Whatever exactly happened, Allison’s bed was colder than ever, but the three of them seemed happy, so she tried to be happy for them.
She had always prided herself on her bravery, and yet Stiles had admitted his feelings, and there she was, staying silent and watching her two best friends fall in love with each other.
***
“Scott asked me to prom,” said Lydia one night, when she was naked beside Allison, her head pillowed on Allison’s chest, strawberry blonde hair fanned out around her like a halo.
Allison barely managed to stop herself from tensing up completely at the words. Her hands paused for a moment as she ran them through Lydia’s hair, but she forced herself to keep them moving, to act as if everything was fine. “Oh?” she asked.
“Yesterday. It wasn’t a big deal or anything but... It felt like it could be.”
“Oh.” said Allison, not sure what else to say.
“I said yes.”
“I assumed so.”
“I’m going to have sex with him.”
Breathe in. Breathe out. Keep your fingers moving. Control your heartbeat. “Alright.”
“That’s it?”
“Didn’t you say that would change things?”
“Change isn’t always so bad.”
Change like getting a haircut or change like forgetting about your best friend who’s completely in love with you so you can sleep with her ex boyfriend, who she’s also completely in love with? Allison wanted to ask.
“Why are you telling me?” she said instead.
Lydia pulled away from Allison’s chest and sat up, her long hair streaming down over her shoulders, brushing the tops of her still bare breasts. “Because I’m not doing it without you.”
“You want me to-?” asked Allison.
Lydia nodded.
“With you and Scott?”
She nodded again.
“Why?"
“Because you’re in love with him.”
“I’m-” started Allison, but she couldn’t finish the sentence. As much as she wanted to, she couldn’t lie to her best friend.
“He’s in love with you too. I think he always will be.”
Allison pulled her fingers away from Lydia’s hair. “No way,” she said. “Not anymore.”
“I am too you know,” said Lydia, ignoring Allison’s last statement.
“You are what?”
Lydia shrugged. “In love with him. In love with you.”
“Oh,” said Allison. She didn’t know what else to say. “Okay.”
Lydia smiled and layed back down, her head returning to its spot, pillowed on Allison’s chest. It took Allison a long time to fall asleep after that.
***
They got ready for prom together. Scott was picking Lydia up at seven, so at six thirty, Allison collected her things and headed for the door.
“Where are you going?”
“To pick up Isaac. He still hasn’t told Danny how he feels, so I told him we could go together.”
“Allison, you’re not going to prom with Isaac.”
“Well I’m not third wheeling with you.”
“It’s not third wheeling if we both want you there.”
Allison wasn’t sure that she completely believed her, but she let Lydia usher her back to the bed and make her sit down, watched as she picked up her phone wand called Danny to tell him that if he didn’t go pick up Isaac and take him out to the most expensive restaurant in town she would personally make sure that the rest of his time in Beacon Hills was a living hell.
Scott arrived five minutes early, and Allison hadn’t known what she’d been expecting, but it hadn’t been this. She hadn’t even known if he’d be expecting her, and yet there he was, the dark green of his bow tie matching Lydia’s pale green mermaid gown, and his lavender vest matching Allison’s own purple dress. He had two corsages in his hand, and a smile on his face so beautiful that it took Allison’s breath away.
Allison and Lydia shared the backseat of his car on the way to dinner, whispering about him just loudly enough that they knew he could hear it with his werewolf ears, but quiet enough that they could pretend he didn’t. At the restaurant, they managed to squish themselves into a table for two, and Lydia linked their pinkies together, and Scott pressed his thigh against hers, and Allison never wanted the moment to end.
They ended up spending almost an two hours there, none of them ready to give up their private corner and return to the real world. Almost fifteen minutes were spent pushing the last bite of crème brûlée back and forth before Lydia finally snatched the dish and ate it, a smirk on her face.
“We should get to the dance,” said Scott regretfully.
“We don’t have to,” said Allison, slipping her hand into Scott’s.
“I did not buy this dress to spend the night hidden in the back of a restaurant,” said Lydia firmly, pushing the crème brûlée dish away from her. “Don’t you two want to show off your lovely date?”
***
The dance was even worse than Allison had expected. The music was mediocre at best, the venue far too large considering how small their senior class was, and most of the people there were the kind of people she’d be glad to leave and never see again the moment she graduated.
There were Danny and Isaac though, slow dancing to a pop song and stealing kisses, and Jackson and Stiles, making out furiously in a corner while Malia stood beside them, looking bored. Erica and Kira were grinding in the middle of the dance floor, seemingly unaware of the crowd of boys staring at them. Even Boyd and Cora were there, sitting in a corner drinking punch and ignoring everyone around them. It may have been horrible, Allison thought, but maybe a little perfect too.
“Are we going to dance or what?” asked Lydia, tugging them onto the dance floor with her. Allison laughed and stumbled after her, nearly tripping in the four inch heels Lydia had forced her into, and shared a fond look with Scott behind her back before Lydia pulled them in close on either side of her. Her stomach fluttered, her heartbeat sped up, and she wondered if this was what being really, truly, happy felt like.
She thought it might be.
***
They went back to Lydia’s once the dance ended, because her bed was the biggest (although none of them said it). Allison had thought it might be awkward, but she should have known Lydia wouldn’t let that happen.
She kissed Allison first, pulling away quickly and looking pointedly at Scott. Allison smiled, turning to Scott and kissing him as well. Kissing both of them was comforting, familiar, and yet this time it felt different, like the start of something new - like everything was falling into place.
Scott kissed Lydia like she was something precious, delicate, like he was afraid if he held her too close he might break her. Allison knew that feeling. No matter how many times she’d proved that should could take care of herself, there was something about Lydia that made Allison want to protect her.
There was something about Scott that made her want to protect him too though, so maybe, Allison thought, that was just what being in love felt like.
Then Lydia pulled away from Scott to kiss her again, and Allison stopped thinking completely.
***
Allison fell asleep that night with Lydia’s head pillowed on her chest, Scott’s arm stretched over Lydia’s stomach to hold her hand, and the feeling that maybe she had finally figured out what had been missing between the two of them before.