Chapter Text
She squinted at the video feed. It wasn’t from these offices. It was another CIA site, one defunct from explosions if she remembers. It was black and white, and she was slightly surprised at the grainy picture given Marshall’s ability. No sound but she didn’t need it.
The gasp came anyway as she saw it go from heated questioning to worse. The echo of his face hitting the metal table didn’t need sound as his nose was broken. A few more moments and the whimper from her couldn’t be stopped as she saw the man wrench his arm back, more brutally than a warning, and the accompanied scream vibrated in her head the same as the memory of when Reknov broke those same joints.
Gasps and tight lines on his face as the man continued kicking and punching him.
The expression on his face went blank as the man shoved him to the floor, getting close to deliver another heated threat and the final punch that broke his cheekbone and eye socket.
Michael Vaughn had done this. A mentor and friend she admired just as much as Miss Bristow herself. She knew from the file and vague whisperings over years that he had every right to be angry. But that video made her chest tighten and brain turn to static as much as both their screams and cries burned into their brains leading up to her son’s arrival.
Trying not to make outward noise, she closed the video, erased any trace she accessed it, and left.
Rachel didn’t know how she kept composure long enough to lock herself in the bathroom. But as soon as she did she couldn’t stop the sobs, throwing up as those images mixed with the ones she actually witnessed.
Not knowing how long it had been the young woman finally pulled herself up, cleaned her face and mouth, and continued down the hall.
She felt hollow, numb, as she approached the interview room, barely answering the one or two people she came across. Waving off the guards (surprisingly convincing) she entered the room where he now sat.
The blonde man tapped his foot, hands folded, as she shut the door.
“Miss Gibson, lovely surprise!” Sark called. Not in a suit this time but still as nicely dressed as he left the house that morning.
He raised an eyebrow as Rachel stared at him.
She couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe. And the look on his face stayed calm and cool. Only she recognized the flicker in his eyes. Something he only had in front of others or the unfortunate times they crossed missions (though not when tied to that bomb).
But all she could see were the bruises that weren’t there anymore, the crunch of bone, and she gasped, choked really. Rachel’s eyes rapidly filled with tears again and though Sark’s appearance remained the same his eyes changed, darker blue. Worried.
She slowly drifted towards him not feeling the movement and reached out. Her fingers were hesitant, not wanting to press into the wounds, but tracing over them.
The blonde man pulled back sharply, swallowing. “Rachel, they’re-” he tried to warn. It didn’t matter they’d been dating nearly a year, they had an agreement to keep it out of CIA reach.
But she shook her head, a sob breaking through. She didn’t care about the cameras Marshall and probably everyone was seeing right now. She touched his jaw that twitched, fingers over his left eye and cheekbone. Then her hands gently went down his left shoulder and cradled around his forearm. Bones that ached in the weather after several times broken.
He made a noise as if he now recognized her movements, but before either could say anything the heavy door flew open.
Rachel stood up fast and tried not to show how dizzy it made her as the tears suddenly stopped. Thank God for spy skills. Sark cleared his throat to hide his own thoughts. Dixon gestured for the woman to follow him and Rachel did so.
Dixon had that caring look on his face and squeezed her elbow. But Rachel schooled her features as one of the other Directors, Adams, walked up. He was a very tall, very stern looking man despite probably not being much older than them.
“Agent Gibson, you’ve been warned several times to stay away from Mr. Sark as he’s high ranked on the most wanted list,” Mr. Adams all but boomed. Was this guy someone who cleaned up jobs that went wrong? Hired by some fantastical group? Focus, Rachel. “Yet you continue to associate with him and have a...child with this man.”
“Sir, with all due respect, my son has nothing to do with this.”
“The man was arrested on his way to your house after reports in Romania. Someone who should not even know where one of our agents lives. Do I need to launch a full internal investigation, Miss Gibson?”
Dixon went to cut in but there wasn’t need.
“Director Adams, while I am well aware of what Mr. Sark has done and probably will do, I nor my infant has anything to do with his crimes. He’s never gained information from me and a baby is not old enough to be a threat.” Where was this even coming from? She never spoke to anyone like this. “We have a...tenuous situation where we share a child, yes, but as I told after my kidnapping that’s as far as it goes. I take responsibility for my indiscretions but not his. And the first sign he’s done anything to jeopardize the child’s wellbeing or my career, I will throw him in maximum security and make sure he doesn’t see light again. I hope my record here at APO shows thus far.”
Dixon tried to hide a smile. That was quite good. He’d only heard speeches like that from Syd.
Adams was quiet for a long time and looked about to explode. Rachel was considering begging anything to keep her job and her emotions were so high she wasn’t sure if she could salvage anything.
“This is highly irregular. Need I remind you what Mr. Sark has done to several agents and offices. If Director Dixon hadn’t spoken to your skills and we didn’t need you right now, I would reassign you to a place not even your current colleagues know of. Keep that in mind, Agent,” he finished before turning to leave.
“Yes, Director.”
As soon as he was out of sight Rachel slumped against the wall.
“Whoa! Easy,” Dixon leaned to grab her. “You alright?” She didn’t respond. “I don’t approve of this arrangement but....as a child’s involved the decision is yours. But I back up Adams’ warning.”
“I know,” she nodded. “And I meant what I said. This is just a business situation for Trevor.”
But his face told he knew it was a lie. She was in love but there wasn’t anything the older man could do except try to help.
The rattle of cuffs made her look up as a guard practically shoved Sark down the hall. He had a cold look on his face but was obvious he had just heard everything.
He didn’t say anything as his hands were released and took the warning look from the older man as he was led out the back, away from their computers and important cases on display.
Rachel sighed as she left, surprised to find him leaning against the car.
“I’ll drive,” he muttered softly.
She couldn’t look at him or any resolve she had the last few minutes would break. Shaking her head she got in, waiting until he did too before driving off.
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It was a wonder she was able to drive and not crash right now. Her fingers were so tight on the wheel and he snuck glances but just shifted uncomfortably instead of the usual flirty chatter.
The baby was with Carrie and the kids. Not that she’d hear much Rachel thought bitterly lately. Carrie had taken Trevor at the last moment when she’d gotten the call so that was a small relief.
Once in the house Rachel went straight for the top cupboard for the wine. Probably not smart after the light painkillers for her ankle but she didn’t care. To reach it she had to stand on tiptoes (slightly overbalancing to protect the tender joint), an action that would normally have her boyfriend sliding up behind her, fingers on skin where her shirt hem rode up, and lips on her neck.
But that didn’t happen. She poured a glass and he just stood there.
“A little early for our date, Luv, but since the boy’s not home I don’t mind an early start,” was said in his usual nonchalance.
How was she able to glare that hard without actually looking at him?
Luv. That word. One he’d said in many occasions from casual to in bed. But now....
Head down, Luv.
“Was she is it?” Rachel finally asked.
Tall, long blonde hair, blue eyes. A slightly rounder face than hers but everything else... Then there was the last thing, the one that stuck out in the very few transcripts the CIA had - a British accent. Just like the one Rachel once used. Rounder, delicate vowels but the point stood.
“Was who what, Luv?”
Another glare.
She knew the woman was once Vaughn’s wife but betrayed them by trying to kill Sydney. But whispers from Eric was all until today.
“Lauren Reed. Was she your... ‘Luv’?” The question was asked flatly but obvious.
Sark shifted, ankles uncrossing, hands in pockets. “She was once.”
Rachel nodded.
You’re so ambitious, love it.... He said in one transcript.
“I get it now.”
“Get what, exactly, Rachel? What is this all about?” Sark’s tone turn exasperated. Why was she bringing up old memories?
“Blonde hair, blue eyes, British accent. She’s why you approached me!”
“Ms. Reed is an uncomfortable subject, I’d rather leave it at that.”
She laughed bitterly. “Oh, you’re uncomfortable?! That’s a good one.”
There wasn’t much else, national secrets and all, but the thing that stood out was the attachment to the man in front of her. Her boyfriend. Was that even what they were?
“I’m the one who’s just now realizing my boyfriend thinks I’m completely gullible!”
He jumped up. “Rachel, normally I’d enjoy a battle of the minds with you but please do explain what you are thinking because for once I’m lost!”
“Really Sark, you’re a smart man, I’m sure you had it all planned out. You couldn’t get information for Masari so you approached me in the bar, we slept together, and it was all just the thrill of it wasn’t it? I was just a carbon copy of the woman you were with before!”
“Now, wait that’s not-”
“Just admit it, Sark, you wanted to pull one over on the CIA again, and while you didn’t expect a kid to come with the deal, you went with it to relive old fun!”
By the end Rachel was shouting full volume and had tears in her eyes but didn’t give him the bait of crying.
“So that’s what this all is,” he chuckled darkly. His spine stiffened and eyes got brighter, like when he was onto something authorities weren’t. “It’s Sark now, not Julian? But that’s no matter. What if that was what attracted me to you? What if I saw a pretty blonde who had no idea I could easily kill her, and wanted a jaunt for old time’s sake? You saw just exactly what Mr. Vaughn did when he found out his wife was my lover, didn’t you?” He wouldn’t admit to the small part of him that felt satisfaction at her flinch on the word.
“Please spare me the details, I’ve seen enough.” She was disgusted but brought it on herself. Rachel went to leave the room but he grabbed her arm tightly.
Spinning her in a way that was not sexy as usual but clear just how threatening he could be.
“Well, let me tell you Miss Gibson, the accent while quite an impressive act was the last thing on my mind.”
“So I was just Lydia, some engineer to fill your bed for the night. Is that why you still call me that?”
“Didn’t we go over this entire thing when we were captive?”
That was before Rachel knew about her.
She rolled her eyes but he wasn’t buying it anymore than she bought his attitude half the time.
“Whether you believe me or not, I was not thinking anything else that night. In the elevator I hate to admit I was embarrassed. Then I saw you in that bar and I was intrigued. I may have had a cover but what we said was the truth, don’t deny it.”
“The best way to maintain an undercover is to get as close to truth as possible,” Rachel recited, holding her glare. She swiped at the hearing aid starting to buzz.
Sark scoffed. “Come off it, Sweetheart! We both felt it. Yeah, it was fun at first but that woman outside the airport was no longer timid, she was angry. And when I was cuffed to that blasted bomb she cut me down, totally disarmed me in front of everyone who wasn’t to know about us. But...in that awful cell I saw this sweet, strong woman who would do anything to protect her child before herself.”
He moved forward, face softening again, and there it was, everything she knew was wrong by law but couldn’t deny in her chest.
“You’re right, I once had feelings for Ms. Reed and thought I could use that. And I never expected a son at all in my life,” He wasn’t even sure she’d have told him given a choice. “But after we brought Trevor home you asked me to stay....That’s not in my line of work, you two are in constant danger, but I stayed - as cliche as it is, I want this. Do you understand?”
“But she - and he beat you - I’m no good to you.” The same words from before.
Sark shook his head, tucking her hair back and lightly tracing the device over her ear. And she didn’t flinch. “I’ll never be good for you,” he said quietly. “But here we are.”
The kiss that followed made Rachel sob once again. To trace the outline of old bruises on his face no longer there.
They made mistakes and being an agent in love with one of the world’s most wanted assassins was probably the biggest. But he was right. Despite the names they used, they were just two people caught up in the most chaotic of situations and saw something neither could avoid.
Would it be the worst one ever? Absolutely. But even badguys fall in love, right? And this spitfire would be a risk he’d take every time.