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Slit Throat, Silent Scream

Chapter 50: My Life, With You

Summary:

We Deserve a Soft Epilogue, My Love

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Chapter 50:  My Life, With You

 

Akira woke slowly to sunlight dappled over his eyelids, and warm comfort pressed softly to his chest.  He smiled lightly, cuddling closer to Goro and pressing his face into his hair.

 

For all the months he had spent feeling unmoored and lost, he had adapted to Goro’s presence in his life startlingly quickly.  Though, maybe that was more from the way they were practically inseparable than anything else.

 

It was… unbelievable, how comfortable his life suddenly was.  Where once he spent his days in near-silence and aimless melancholy, now he woke up warm; arms full of Goro, and chest full to bursting with adoration.  He could barely even take time to remember how things used to be – he was just too busy enjoying what he had now.

 

He couldn’t help but hold Goro tightly, needing to find some outlet for the curling contentment filling him entirely.

 

“Ugh, ‘Kira, get th’ fuck off.”  Goro hissed, curling backwards into Akira’s chest despite his sleepy protest.

 

“Good morning, love.”  Akira grinned against the nape of his neck, letting hair tickle his eyelids.

 

“No.”  Goro moved from where he’d been gently holding onto Akira’s arms in order to shove at him.  “Gross.”

 

Huffing a laugh, Akira twined his legs purposefully with Goro’s, braving his ice-cold feet to pin them more completely together.  “My darling, my sweetheart, my perfect sweetpea.”

 

“You’re vile.  Get the hell off of me.”  Goro was obviously waking up now, because he pushed futilely at Akira’s face in reprimand.

 

“You love me, really.”  Akira cheered, pressing a kiss to the hand Goro was shoving at him with.

 

“No I don’t.  Fuck off.”

 

“Not one of your most believable lies, honey.”

 

Akira was pressed close enough that he could feel Goro smile begrudgingly.  “You’re the worst.  Why the hell are you waking me up on a fucking Sunday, anyway?”

 

“You’re too perfect.  Had to hold you.”  Akira purred, laying it on extra thick just to be annoying.

 

“I’m going back to sleep.”  Goro huffed, and Akira cracked his eyes open just enough to see a radiant blush coloring his ears.

 

“Hmmm.”  Akria hummed and settled down to cuddle under their thick duvet.  Winter seemed extra cold this year, and he was clinging to the warmth of their bed with determination.  He lost track of time, drifting comfortably into a doze as Goro relaxed against him.

 

It could have been mere minutes, or an entire hour before Goro groaned – Akira was too familiar with the ways Goro groaned to mistake this for anything other than pain.

 

“Honey?”  He asked, opening his eyes to check on him.

 

“It’s nothing.  Must be a storm coming up or something.”  Goro hissed, reaching one hand up to rub at his chest.

 

They’d discovered, as Autumn turned to Winter, that Goro hadn’t escaped the Metaverse unscathed.  While everything worked just fine, and he certainly wasn’t in danger of dying – even from annoyance when Akira dragged him to Takemi in a panic for x-rays – scar tissue had embedded itself into his spine, and along his chest where the bullets had once ripped through him.

 

Warmth, regular stretches, and exercise were gradually helping Goro overcome the pain, but the shifting seasons and any pressure changes could easily cause flare-ups.

 

Concerned, Akira rubbed at the center of his back, right over his spine, pressing close to try and share even more warmth.  “You wanna just stay in bed today?”  He asked.

 

In response, Goro just scoffed at him.  “Absolutely not.  I’m not pathetic.”

 

“Taking care of your body isn’t pathetic, dumbass.”  Akira grumbled, reaching around with his other hand to pet across Goro’s chest, where scar tissue still puckered the skin.

 

“You just want an excuse to carry me around and play caretaker.”  Goro snickered at him.

 

“Maybe.”  Akira grinned.  “But you love it when I do that.”

 

“Do I?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“You sound so sure of yourself.”

 

“I just know you so well.”

 

“Well aren’t you special.”  Goro scoffed.  He paused, then grinned antagonistically.  “You’re such a special little snowflake the entire Metaverse bent to your whims.”

 

“Hey, don’t hold that against me!  It got you to come back, didn’t it?”

 

“At this rate you’re going to think you can have a mental break every time you want something, and it’ll just be handed to you.”

 

“Well, I already have everything I want, so…”  Akira trailed off with a grin.

 

“Oh, fuck off.”  Goro shoved his way out of their little cocoon sat up with a grunt to grab his phone, obviously fighting off pain.  “Don’t you have a café to run, instead of tormenting me?”

 

Like he was pulled by a string, Akira followed closely, wrapping his arms back around Goro plaintively.  “Not today, you know Sojiro only lets me work part-time right now.”

 

“Hm.”  Goro grunted noncommittally.  He rolled his shoulders, obviously trying to be casual, but Akira caught the way his breath hitched with the movement.

 

He felt his brow furrow, and he carefully started to run his hands over Goro’s chest where he knew the mottled scars remained.  “At least let me give you a massage.”

 

“I could have places to be today, you know.”  Goro grumbled, but Akira could feel the way the knotted muscles in his chest and back were already relaxing under his hands.

 

“No one is going to blame you for staying home.  Besides, you don’t have places to be today.”  Akira kept up the gentle kneading and petting.  “Not without me, anyway.”

 

“Hmph.”  Goro grunted again, but notably didn’t protest.  It was pretty telling that they hadn’t gone anywhere without each other for months.  Well, except for school.  Goro still needed to be ‘dead’ to avoid Shido’s lingering network, so it wasn’t like he could just show up at his old school and ask to finish his third year.

 

Regardless, Akira still got vaguely anxious if Goro wasn’t within grabbing distance, and outright jumpy whenever they had to be apart for too long.  School was very much an exercise in mitigating his fears by texting Goro at every available minute.

 

Still, all of that meant that Goro almost never had plans that didn’t involve Akira, and vice versa.  The rest of the Thieves had pretty much decided that they came as a package deal at this point, and Akira did less than nothing to dissuade that notion.

 

Point being, Goro was just being difficult.

 

“Is there a specific reason you don’t want me to pamper you?  You’re obviously hurting.”  Akira wished Goro was facing him, because then he could possibly leverage a pout.  Oh well.

 

Goro just snorted.  “Maybe I just don’t want to feel like a fucking invalid.”

 

Ah.

 

“Goro, how many times do I have to tell you that you’re devastatingly capable before you believe me?”

 

He stilled against Akira’s front.  “None, I know exactly what I’m capable of.  It’s just… frustrating.”

 

“Yeah, I know.”

 

It wasn’t like Akira was perfectly fine all the time either.  He still got phantom pains in his throat, right under the lingering ‘X’ scar, and there were days where his voice fled him entirely.  Of course it was absolutely frustrating, but at the very least Goro had a clear, physical reason for his pain; Akira’s brain just liked to be a malicious fuck.

 

“I know you know.”  Goro sighed, then leaned back.  “Fine, we can stay in bed a little longer.”

 

Akira grinned, and gently maneuvered them to lay back into the comforter.  “What about that massage?”

 

With a grunt, Goro turned himself around in Akira’s arms to give him an unimpressed look.  “Soaking in the bathhouse will be more than sufficient.”

 

“Afterwards?”  Now he could pull out the pout and puppy eyes.  Goro didn’t exactly crumble like Ann tended to, but he definitely softened.  Akira had a sneaking suspicion that Goro was a little bit enamored with his eyes when he wasn’t wearing glasses.  Not that he’d ever admit it.

 

“Jesus, fine.”  Goro ceded after a long moment.  “As long as we can play chess.”

 

God forbid either of them get bored.  Akira had to grin as he wrapped his boyfriend into the warmth of their bed and gently rubbed at his back.  “Of course.  We obviously can’t let it end on a tie.”

 

“I’m going to crush you, Sakura.”  Goro grinned.

 

“Oh, are you?”  Akira still couldn’t get used to how Sojiro’s family name felt as his own, and Goro endlessly abused the way it made him soft and happy.

 

“Of course, you’re just a weak fool for me, after all.”  Goro leaned forward to press their foreheads together.

 

“Yeah, and you’re an unhinged freak for me.”  Akira retorted.  It was a lie; they were both unhinged freaks.  And both fools for that matter.

 

“Hmm, maybe.”

 

It was soft, and warm, and comfortable between them.  Akira couldn’t feasibly imagine a place he’d rather be.  He just wished he could convince Goro to spend more days lounging around the attic (really, it was their apartment to some extent, especially once Sojiro managed to fit an actual bathroom in it).

 

Gently, trying to express even an iota of how much Goro meant to him, Akira leaned in for a kiss.  As always, Goro’s lips were soft, almost achingly pleasant against his own.  He moved with Akira, leaning in willingly and smirking into the kiss, which just made Akira love him even more.

 

With as much emotion as he could muster, he pulled back, then moved in again, pressing affection across Goro’s cheek, up to where his hair lay mussed against his brow line.  Then, he kissed down to the tip of Goro’s nose, and back to his lips.  While Akira was busy, Goro had apparently started laughing.

 

“You’re truly ridiculous.”  He breathed into Akira’s mouth.

 

“Nothing ridiculous about it.”  Akira chuckled.  “I just love you too much.”

 

“Too much?”  Goro questioned lightly, landing a nipping press of teeth against Akira’s lips.

 

“Yeah.  It overflows sometimes and I just have to kiss my perfect boyfriend all over.  It’s a liability really.”  At this rate, his face was going to get stuck in a permanent smile from how happy Goro made him.

 

“Hmmm.  I suppose I love you too, in that case.”  Goro snickered, but Akira could feel the blush burning up his cheeks.  Someday he’d get Goro so used to affection that this wouldn’t phase him.

 

“You suppose?”

 

“If you hold me back in a fight, I’m kicking you to the curb.”

 

That was such a Goro thing to say.  Akira pressed them closer, twining their legs together.  “Guess we’ll have to go back to sparring when it warms up in Spring.”  He started to rub circles around the spot on Goro’s spine where the knew the ache was centered.

 

“Sounds good.  Don’t you dare hold back.”  Goro quipped, even as he pressed into Akira’s hands.

 

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

 

Eventually, they would have to get out of bed, even if just to soak at the bath house, but Akira was more than happy to hold the quiet moments close and precious.  Today was a perfect fragment of peace in what Akira hoped would become a lifetime of shining moments together.

 

After all, tomorrow he and Ann were skipping a few classes to run a special errand.  There was a ring Akira had spotted in a jewelry store – a silver one that was veined through with shining obsidian – and he needed a chance to buy it without Goro noticing.

 

For now though, he cuddled close to Goro, determined to shower him with kisses and gentle affection until he was either forced to stop, or Goro broke and started giggling.

 

Just a few months ago, he’d dreaded the future.  Couldn’t even conceive of his place in it after he had lost so much of himself.  But now, he was well and truly home.

 

“Akira –”

 

He nosed his way to Goro’s throat, grinning as he allowed his eyelashes to brush just under the corner of his jawline.  There was a shake in Goro’s chest, and Akira could almost taste victory.

 

“Goddamnit, Akira, what are you even –”

 

Goro broke of with what was undeniably a giggle.  A completely adorable, perfect, choked off little giggle that was repressed so quickly that he couldn’t wait to draw it out again.  Akira claimed his triumph with a pressing kiss against the ticklish spot, smiling so wide his face hurt.

 

“Sakura, I’m going to kill you.”

 

He couldn’t wait for the rest of their lives.  Together.

 

 

End

 

 

 

Notes:

A/N:
Thank you everyone for reading what has turned into a monster of a fic! I cannot even begin to describe how much joy (and, to be totally fair, pain) this fic has brought me, and I am amazed and overjoyed by all the response and love you’ve given!

This fic started out as a complete trope with some twists – only meant to be 8 chapters and 20k words long when I planned it out. Now one year, 180k words, and fifty fucking chapters later, here we are at the end! I am SO EXCITED!

I hope you all enjoyed coming with me on this adventure!! And don’t worry! I have way more in store for P5, including stuff associated with We Locked Eyes, and some brand new fics that I’ve been a bit too busy to work on. (There’s even a NG fic that may kill me before it even gets off the ground – and will probably be even longer than this one lol).

Thank you so so so much for all of your support! Hope you enjoyed to the very end!
<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3!!!!!!