Chapter Text
Simon
I'm going to the palace to meet the Queen tomorrow...
Ayub
Oh damn!! good luck lol
But fr how are you feeling about that?
Simon
I don't know
Can we facetime?
So Simon spent his Sunday evening in bed with his phone propped up on the wall talking to Ayub. He didn't realize how much the imminent royal meeting and its uncertainty around it was affecting him until then. What was awaiting him? What would they say about them? Was their relationship something so dire they absolutely had to come to the palace to discuss it and there was no other way?
"Do you know what they want?" Ayub asked.
Simon shook his head. "Something about discussing our relationship, it just all sounded very serious and professional. I don't think it was an invitation for fika because she just wants to meet her son's boyfriend."
Ayub let out a humoured huff. "Boyfriend, shit, you really are the crown prince's boyfriend. Still crazy."
Since Simon told his friends about his and Wille's relationship barely a week ago they had begrudlingly supported it. Rosh was still mildly distrustful towards Wille and Ayub had just said that the only one who could decide what he wanted to do was him and that was that.
He was glad he had friends on his side, telling him out loud how crazy this was, something Simon couldn't bear to say out loud or even think. The whole thing was crazy and ridiculous and he still couldn't believe the situation he was in. He needed someone to remind him that this wasn't normal and who wasn't afraid to express it.
"Yeah," Simon agreed. "Crazy."
There must have been something showing on his face because Ayub's expression turned more serious and concerned. "Are you scared?"
"No, not scared, just...it's kind of daunting, you know?" Ayub shrugged in agreement.
"I just don't know what to expect. It's not like I have spent much time in the past thinking about meeting the Queen, I never wanted to have anything to do with her or the entire monarchy. And for others it might be super exciting and a huge honor but that's not really how I feel. It's not like they're super fond of me either, I'm the boy who stole away their heir and who he made a scandalous sextape with."
Ayub snorted. "Yeah, that is tough, I get it even though I will never relate to it."
Simon let out a weak chuckle and then sighed. "What am I supposed to do, like how do you act around the parents of your boyfriend who is the freaking royal couple?"
"Just be yourself, dude, you can't let them drive you crazy. Maybe be polite but stand your ground, don't let them intimidate you."
Simon smiled. He could always count on Ayub easing his worries and make things feel less terrifying or complicated. "Yeah, that sounds good." He let his head fall into his pillow, his eyes falling close for a moment.
"Getting sleepy?"
Simon hummed in reply.
"Do you want to hang up?"
"No. Can we just stay like this for a while?"
"Sure."
They both laid in their respective beds, Simon's lamp filling the room with a dark red. His eyes were starting to droop shut but he didn't want to be alone yet. He appreciated the companionable silence between them, not every second needed to be filled with words with Ayub and for that Simon was grateful.
"Should we turn off the lights?" Ayub asked after a while.
"Hmm," Simon agreed. "On three."
"One."
"Two."
"Three."
Simon turned off the lamp which left him in the dull glow of his lava lamp.
"Good night, Simme."
"Good night."
Simon managed to sleep through until 6am, a little earlier than he normally needed to but he decided to get up. He didn't want to lay in bed and brood, he wouldn't be able to fall back asleep anyway.
When he asked Wilhelm if he should wear anything in particular, Wille just shrugged and meant that he shouldn't dress up for his parents and wear something comfortable. Simon still didn't want to go with his most worn casual sweaters but he also didn't really own anything fancy so he decided on his purple buttoned up shirt and some normal trousers. There was still a school day ahead and the temperatures were only slowly starting to get warmer as the snow was melting so he ended up putting his purple hoodie over his shirt. He could still take it off later.
When he saw Wilhelm at school they smiled at each other but otherwise didn't spend much time together. Simon wanted to get through this school day not constantly distracted and he managed for a few periods before it was the last class of the day and the reminder of where they would go after kicked in again. His hands started trembling slightly when he tried to write something down and he could barely concentrate on the topic. It was no use, nerves had taken over.
After class, after he had gathered all his things and met Wille outside with Malin standing next to him, he wasn't doing much better. Wille smiled at him and grasped his hand, a welcoming comfort that managed to calm Simon a little.
"Hey, are you ready?" He asked. Simon shrugged. "As ready as I'll ever be."
Malin opened the door for Wille to get into the car and Simon crawled in after him. Their hands stayed connected through half of the car ride but when Simon felt his hand getting too sweaty, he quickly removed it and wiped it on his jeans. His nerves were showing and he tried to tamper them down.
Instead he looked over to Wille whose back was straight, his eyes staring right ahead, he had all the assurance of a calm, stoic royal but Simon could see his little nervous ticks. His jaw was stiff and clenching and his other hand was tightly fisted. Maybe he should ask Wille how he was feeling, a distraction from his own anxieties.
"Do you look forward to seeing your parents?"
Wille's head turned to him and just by looking into his eyes it told Simon everything. Wille's eyes were always the most expressive part of him, he could hide his true emotions on his face but his eyes always spoke for him and now they were expressing the same uncertainty that Simon was experiencing.
"I don't know," Wilhelm released a sigh and his shoulders loosened. "I mean, yes I do but it's never really seeing my parents, you know? Right now it's because of a meeting, not a friendly visit, it's all about the crown. I don't get to see them just as parents that often, especially my mother, she's always also the Queen. So, no, I'm not looking forward to that."
Simon squeezed Wille's hand. He couldn't imagine what it must have been like having the monarchs of the country as your parents. He could understand having a troubled, complicated relationship (he knew that with his dad all too well) but his mother was one of his most important people in the world. They had a strong bond, they both felt responsible for their family in their own way and took care of each other after Micke's problems started and the eventual split.
It wasn't always perfect, not by far (he wished sometimes some things would've been different and wondered if maybe he had been carrying too much on his shoulders at such a young age) but Simon had no doubt in his mind that she was always there for him and could count on her support, no matter what.
"It's also just weird now...without Erik. It doesn't feel right, just the three of us." Wilhelm cleared his throat and kept his eyes down on their intertwined hands.
It was the first time Wilhelm had mentioned his brother to Simon since Christmas and even before then he barely did. Simon didn’t retort anything but let Wille's words linger in the car, it didn't feel appropriate to say something. He just kept squeezing Wille's hand, trying to be a comforting presence and figured that was the only thing he could do for him.
Something else Simon couldn't and didn't want to imagine was losing his sister. Sara was his second most important person in the world, his little family meant everything to him and he couldn't bear thinking about losing her forever.
Even right now when her betrayal was still fresh and thinking about her stung and he was avoiding her, he loved Sara with all his heart and would do anything for her. He hoped it was mutual, normally Simon would've never questioned it but now after everything he found out he wasn't so sure anymore. His love for her wasn't broken but his perception and trust in her was and that was going to take time to repair if it ever even fully did.
But Wilhelm didn't get hurt by a sibling and had the choice to see or avoid them, he lost his brother in an accident. And if that wasn't enough he took on his brother's title, had to become Crown Prince. And his parents lost a son. Burying your child was something no one should ever have to experience. Simon wondered how they were even able to function and go on after that loss. It's because they had to.
Had any of them even have time to fully process it and grieve? What did 'real' mourning look like anyway? Was there ever an end to grief?
All of a sudden Simon gained a different perspective and it removed the barrier he had held subconsciously in his head between them from seeing them as distant royal statutes to real human beings. He wondered if that barrier would become more or less apparent when he was actually going to meet them.
Was that how everyone saw them? Someone afar, living a crazy, unobtainable life, being literal historic figureheads? Was that how people saw Wilhelm?
Not that long ago Simon did too but everything was different now.
To lighten up the mood a little Simon asked: "So, when I meet your mamma, is there something I should know or do like bow?"
"Don't bow," Wille said immediately.
"Isn't that a thing?"
"Do you bow to me?"
Simon shook his head. "You've made me kneel but not like that, no."
Wille looked at him sharply. He apparently did not find it funny. "And I never will. Don't do anything you wouldn't do with me either, treat them like you treat me. Not something special."
"Okay." Simon would try but that was easier said than done, he knew Wille but he didn't really know his parents. And even though he didn't believe in treating people differently based on their wealth and social status, something that also wasn't very popular in Sweden, the one exception was the royal family.
After a while they arrived at Drottningholm, what Simon knew was their private residence where they lived. He hadn't expected to drive there and not to the actual castle in the old town of Stockholm. Well, apparently he was going to discover the place where Wille grew up in today.
He has never been there and seeing the baroque castle in real life was certainly different than seeing fleeting images of it. It was pretty, he couldn't lie. But it felt more like a museum to visit than an actual home. The size, the grandiosity, the beauty, the history in this place - it hit him that this was Wilhelm's actual life.
The drive had felt agonisingly long but now they were ushered out of the car and escorted inside and walked through some impressive halls until they stopped at a room with a long table in it, it all felt so fast and unreal. Simon barely had time to look where he was going and examine the place when the royal couple stepped in.
The Queen came in first, after her her husband and two women and one guy trailed after them. The Queen smiled fondly when she saw Wille and walked towards him. They shared a brief hug. "Hej, älskling, I'm so happy to see you."
"Hej, mamma." When they separated her hand caressed his cheek for a second and trailed down to stroke his shoulder before she let up and turned to Simon. To his surprise she also smiled at him and it didn't even look fake.
"Hello, Simon, nice to meet you again." She struck her hand out and Simon took it without attempting an awkward curtsy this time. "Your Majesty. Thank you for having me."
"You're welcome, thank you for coming." She still smiled warmly at him, that, coupled with her greeting of Wille already made him have to question the picture of a stern, disapproving mother he had of her in his mind. It somehow didn't quite fit.
Wille and his father had just hugged when he turned to Simon. They shook hands and he greeted Simon with the same kind face as his wife which Simon tried to emulate. "Simon, great to finally meet you."
"Hello, Your Royal Highness. Likewise. Again, thank you for having me."
Be polite. Don't let them intimidate you.
Wille frowned at him like he was disapproving of Simon's way. Did he expect Simon to just call them Kristina and Ludvig and dismiss their titles altogether? Simon might've been a monarchy critic but he wasn't going to disrespect them in their own home that they invited him into.
The rest of the entourage came up to Wille and greeted him. "Welcome home, kronprins." Wilhelm acknowledged them with a nod.
They turned to him and introduced themselves: Minou, whose name Simon recognized as the one who had picked up Kristina's phone when he and Wille had called, another woman called Farima and the man's name was Peter. They all looked younger than what Simon had imagined people from the royal court to look like. Nothing like that other guy, Jan-Olof, he saw once at Hillerska with Wilhelm.
"Please sit." Farima gestured for them to sit down and everyone took their seat as they all obviously knew where to go. Simon just followed Wilhelm and took the empty seat next to him and hoped there wasn't some special protocol about seat arrangements that didn't allow him to sit on the left or right side of the crown prince or something. You never knew.
When everyone had settled down, the staff all on the short side of the table, the Queen, who was on the opposite side to them alongside her husband, sat upright and folded her hands on the table and looked at them.
"First of all, I want to say that we are not here to tear you two apart. We support your relationship and have no intention of separating you."
That eased Simon's worries a little (they wouldn't have been able to separate them anyway) but he was still confused as to what exactly the issue was then. Was there even an issue? Had he misunderstood the intent behind this visit?
"Nonetheless we need to discuss your situation, if you're being serious about each other it's only right to talk about it and for you both be present for it."
So far, so good. They were serious and he was glad they were finally acknowledging it.
Minou stepped in. "Simon, there are a few questions we need to ask you about your secondary gender, is that alright?"
Did he have a choice? He nodded, swallowing down the lump in his throat. "Okay."
"When did you present?"
"Uh, last year, in March."
He remembered it all too well, hating it and dreading what his life was going to be like. He had ignored the signs leading up to it and at first he vehemently denied and protested against it that no, that couldn't be true, he couldn't be one of the one percent that were destined to be submissive slaves (he knew now that they were much more than that and he had to learn how to let go of his own preconceived negative connotations). He knew how omegas were treated and it wasn't pretty and he was determined not to let his life be controlled by it.
"Do you take suppressants or any other medication?"
Her sharp eyes directed at him made Simon want to slide deeper into his chair. "I got suppressants for my heat, that's it." Did he have to defend himself for using them? Did they want him to stop or were they going to control his usage now? Suddenly he got scared of what they could make him do and this whole thing felt like an interrogation.
"What is this, what do you need to know this for?" Wilhelm asked irritated, obviously not liking this either.
"Wilhelm, please just let them do their job," Kristina said.
But Wille didn't back down. "They can talk to us if they are going to stop asking Simon invasive questions." His words left no room for debate.
The Queen shared a look with the court members and then she nodded. "Alright."
"Apologies, Your Highness. Now, you said you don't want to go public, is that correct?" Wilhelm turned to Simon to look for his response so Simon nodded and then he turned back to Minou, his head held high. "Yes. For now."
"Good, it wouldn't be favourable to have you two be associated right now, the video is still too fresh. Keeping you out of the public eye is in everyone's best interest but it's still important to discuss certain strategies if you were to come out eventually. It's not going to happen over night but we could ease the public into it over the next two years, let them get used to the idea. Your second gender identities will definitely help with that."
Simon frowned. "What does that mean?"
Everyone's heads turned to him and he immediately regretted asking, he was probably supposed to listen and not speak out of turn, he just couldn't help himself.
"It means," this time Farima responded, "that if at some point you two start being out more in public and your relationship would be official once you're eighteen, we will make sure that your secondary gender is also public knowledge."
Simon still didn't quite understand. "Why?" People knowing he was an omega was probably inevitable but why did they want to 'make sure' it was known?
Simon was readying himself for barely suppressed sighs and signs of annoyance but when Farima answered him it was in a perfectly calm and neutral tone. "You being an omega actually works in our favour. The Crown Prince together with a boy will certainly throw some people off and will make them question the future of the monarchy. There have always been doubts and criticisms about the modern monarchy but the fact that you are also an alpha and an omega in a relationship - which is, let's say, more traditional and conventional - might be helpful and even it out again, making you more socially acceptable."
Simon had trouble keeping his face under control. What the fuck? He felt a weird wave of déjà vu. Hasn't he heard these words before somewhere?
"Now normally I wouldn't care or just tell him to be more discreet about it but you are an omega and Wilhelm is an alpha now, what is stopping you from being together, you are a socially acceptable match, congratulations!"
Turned out, Nils wasn't wrong. He should've never been scared that it would be a problem, no, quite the opposite apparently.
"That is not what defines us. I have no interest of making us more socially acceptable," Wilhelm said firmly. Simon was glad he didn't have to say it and that they were on the same page.
"Of course, Your Highness, it doesn't have to be how you perceive your own relationship but it's the reality of how it is going to be perceived. It will potentially help usher in not just younger, maybe more open and liberal people who weren't big fans of the monarchy before but also keep traditionalists at ease."
Simon felt like he was dreaming. But he couldn't quite figure out if it was good or a nightmare. He should've known them accepting their relationship was too good to be true. Technically they did but them talking about methods and strategies as if this wasn't about two real people with real feelings had him feeling sick. And now apparently he was even helping the monarchy to stay alive. What irony!
"So this is it, we're just going to be used?" He was glad that Wilhelm was speaking, Simon didn’t think he could get out words and it was probably better if he didn't say what was going through his mind.
"This is a good thing, Wilhelm," Kristina spoke up. "No one's going to be used."
"No, it's just all about the approval of the public and the Crown's image. And now that it wouldn't just be a scandal because we're two guys but because our second genders are traditionally compatible you approve. It has never been about real acceptance, has it?" Wilhelm basically spit out the words, fury building inside him.
"I -," Kristina corrected herself, "we love you and accept you no matter what, that is not even remotely put into question. This is merely to discuss the future and I want it to be as easy and comfortable as possible for you, we're on your side." It was meant to sound confident probably but her words came out more pleading at the end.
"And with discussing you mean you're telling us, not asking us what we think or how we feel." Wille was glaring, letting his gaze land on every single person and they all hung their head and avoided his eyes. Simon didn’t know if it was his authoritative Crown Prince or Alpha presense that made them act so deferential (or maybe both) but he couldn't quite fathom anything that was happening right now.
The man from the royal court, Peter, eventually dared to speak up. "If I may speak, Your Royal Highness - these are merely facts and information we want to bring across for your understanding. We are aware that times are different now and have evolved and male omegas can't reproduce anymore so the potential future of the monarchy could still be questioned by the people but that is not our current concern and not something for you to worry about."
Great, so now he wasn't even a proper omega, he was a defective one. What a shame he couldn't get pregnant and pop out future heirs for them to care about and gain approval of royalists. Something he wasn't worried about before they brought it up. Simon had a feeling this sentence was supposed to make them feel better but it just made him feel worse. He didn't want to be here anymore.
Wille scoffed and seemed like he was about to argue some more when his mother cut in. Maybe she noticed Simon's discomfort or was also not happy about the words because her mouth was set in a grim, thin line. "I think that's enough for now. Let's take a breather and ruminate on the said things and get back to it on a later date."
She stood up and just like that the end of that conversation was declared. Everyone else started standing up too, Simon following Wille's example. Kristina turned to them, her expression clearly attempting to be more cheerful. "Wilhelm, Simon, I would love for you to join us for dinner later."
Simon halted in his spot. He was not prepared for that.
Ludvig also smiled at them. "It would be nice to have a meal together, the four of us."
Oh. So that meant no bodyguards or members of the royal court present but only them. Simon realized this was his way in, he was invited as a dinner guest but more than that, as the Crown Prince's boyfriend. And he could very obviously not decline that invitation.
He forced a smile on his face that he hoped looked grateful. "That is very nice, I would love to, thank you."
He just had to let his mother know he was not going to be home for dinner then.
They had about 2 hours to kill before dinner and Wille led him away through the palace that Simon couldn't help but gawk at but he really only wanted to see one place.
"Am I gonna get to see your room?" He looked up to Wille who turned a light shade of red.
"If you want," Wille said, bashful. Simon nodded. He needed a distraction and he knew exactly what he wanted it to be.
They walked through more glamourous and luxurious hallways and up some stairs until they reached the doors to Wille's bedroom. It looked almost modest, well, if you took away the entire exterior. There was a bed, a desk, a closet, some knick knacks (more frogs), everything neat and tidy that some cleaner had most likely taken care of prior and had much more worth than anything in Simon's room probably. The room itself was almost as big as Simon's entire house and yet it was still one of the smaller rooms in the castle.
Being exposed to Wilhelm's life like that, his parents, his residence, the way people reacted to him was something else than just knowing about it. He never let himself forget about who Wille really was but the environment in Hillerska was still a different one. It felt like its own little world and now they took a step outside of their bubble and he was confronted with what it really meant to be the Crown Prince's boyfriend.
Simon stood in the middle of the room, looking around (he noticed an en suite bathroom) when Wilhelm walked closer to him. "Hey, I'm sorry about the whole thing. I didn't know what they were going to say and I would have never let them if -"
"It's okay." Simon tugged on Wille's shirt and put a grin on his face. "Let's not think about that now." This up close Wille was too tall and he had to go on his tip toes to kiss him. Wilhelm reciprocated the kiss eagerly, nudging his nose, Simon had to lean back and hands came around his waist to tug him closer. They both savoured their first kiss this day which was also their first one in three days. They were finally alone and not under constant watchful eyes.
Simon pulled back after a while and walked backwards to the bed. He sat down and stretched his arms out. "Come here." Wille followed him until he stood between his legs and their lips met again, tongues languorously exploring each other with no direction. It was good but it wasn't enough. Not enough distraction. He needed more.
Simon made impatient noises against his mouth and Wille let up. "What is it?"
"I want..." He whined and tugged on Wille's shirt again, a clear indicator that he wanted it off. Wille's eyes widened. "Really, you want – here? Now?"
Simon nodded. "Don't you want to fuck me in your bed?" Wilhelm let out a groan at his words and Simon grinned satisfied. He got him.
"Fuck, yes, I do but how are you feeling, you know... after that?" Seriously, did Wille have to do this now, couldn't he just be happy and horny and go with it?
"I'm fine."
"Really?"
Simon forced his most innocent smile on his face and nodded. "Mm, yes, really. It's all good."
Wilhelm still looked him over suspiciously but he apparently came to the conclusion that it wasn't worth fighting over. He let himself be tugged down and Simon crawled further on the bed. It was so much bigger than Wille's twin sized bed at Hillerska, he wasn't used to it but he wanted to take advantage of all the space.
Wille was now hovering above him, still fully dressed. He couldn't have that, Simon pulled on his shirt and Wille got the hint and took off his shirt while Simon fumbled with his own belt and pulled his jeans down.
This was taking too long. "Come on, I want you inside me." He swung his jeans away, making them land somewhere on the ground, pulled his shirt off and then went to tug down Wille's pants. Finally, they were off, now there wasn't much separating them anymore.
"Wait, did you buy the condoms?" Wilhelm sat up and angled his body so that Simon's hands couldn't reach him anymore. He groaned frustrated.
"Yes, but I don't have them with me now."
"But shouldn't we – we said we would –"
"I don't care, I wanna feel you." Simon wrapped his legs around Wille's waist, he just wanted him close, what did condoms matter?
"No, Simon, I don't know about this."
"What, you don't want to fuck me?"
"Of course I do but –"
"Then fuck me like an alpha should." His words came out sharp, almost vicious.
Wille flinched at his tone and frowned. "Simon."
No. He didn't want his concerned voice, he didn't want that look, the way Wilhelm was looking at him now - all worried and not turned on. He didn't even sound mad, more disappointed. That was not how things were supposed to go.
"What?" Simon snapped. He couldn't be vulnerable right now, anything but that. He flipped them around and sat down on Wille's lap. They were both in their boxers and he started grinding down on the other, pleased to find that Wille was hard. "You do want me, so get to it finally!"
"Not like this."
"No?"
Wille shook his head. He easily could but he hasn't stopped Simon's movements.
"You don't want to fuck me raw and come inside me?"
No response. Simon kept going.
"You don't want to breed your omega and hope that it catches?"
A hitch of breath, that was reaction enough for Simon to grind down harder. "You don't want to knock me up?"
Wilhelm's hands came to encircle his slim waist and gripped him tight. "Stop it, Simon." He pressed out between gritted teeth.
"Really, you want me to stop? Do you want me to obey you like the good omega I am? Like I'm supposed to?"
"Fucking hell, Simon." Did it just feel like it or did Wilhelm glide him back and forth on his clothed cock?
Simon lost his composure for a second and cursed quietly. His own cock has been twitching, precum wetting the inside of his underwear. He didn't really know what they were doing, what kind of game they were playing but he wanted to see it through.
"Make me stop. You just have to tell me and I would have no choice, come on then, alpha."
Wille growled. Fingertips were digging harder into his waist, guiding him along on his lap.
"Yes, you're my big, strong alpha. Claim me, take me, get me pregnant. That's what my life is supposed to be, isn't it? Securing the lineage of the monarchy, always serving and obeying my alpha king."
"Fuck that," Wille gritted out, almost fully controlling his hips now. Simon could feel him throbbing underneath him.
He smiled. "Don't I belong to you? You don't want to claim me and make sure I always behave, make me obey you, no matter what?"
"No."
"No what?"
Wille's movements started getting rougher as did his voice. His hands slid further down, one to grab Simon's hip in a bruising grip and the other came down on his ass with a smack. "Just stop fucking talking."
That was an unexpected surprise. Simon gasped out loud and his cock jumped. They were both getting close. Just one more push. "Make me."
Wille crashed his lips onto his and forced Simon's mouth open. It was barely a kiss, more like teeth clashing together. There was nothing gentle about it but Simon welcomed anything but soft and sweet. He dug his nails into Wille's shoulder.
They kept grinding against each other, chasing their high. There was something thrilling about not even being fully naked, using each other for their pleasure like this. Somewhere along the lines they stopped kissing, Simon was panting against Wille's lips, managing to get out one last breathless command: "Make me yours."
It was what tipped Wilhelm over. He let out another growl and slid Simon roughly over his lap before he ceased his movements. Simon could feel his cock twitching through the thin material and he briefly wished there was nothing separating them, his hole clenching, wanting, yearning for his cum inside him. He imagined Wille filling him up and then his own orgasm hit him and he was spilling inside his boxers. They gasped and groaned against each other's lips, riding out their highs together.
They stayed for a while like this, Wilhelm's grip was loosening and that's when Simon realized the death grip he had had on his waist. When Wille removed his hands Simon looked down and saw the outline of them around his hips. There were surely going to be handprint shaped bruises later, he mused happily and slid off Wille's lap onto the bed.
Wilhelm got up and disappeared for a minute. When he came back he wore pants again and walked over to Simon. He held a pair of fresh underwear and a wet cloth in his hand and threw them next to him. "Here, use this and put these on."
Simon sat up and sluggishly removed his own sticky underwear and cleaned himself up. He put the fresh boxers on that Wille gave him, they were slightly loose on him but he immediately felt better. He wanted to thank him but the other stood on the edge of the bed with a displeased look on his face.
"What the hell was that?"
"Huh?" Simon said unintelligently. His mind and body hadn't quite caught up yet with reality.
"What the hell was that?" Wilhelm repeated, snarling angrily.
Simon didn’t want Wille to be angry with him, not when he was still recovering from his high. He wanted to curl up in the bed, make himself comfortable in the soft and silky sheets, maybe cuddle with Wille. Yeah, that sounded nice.
Not whatever was happening now.
"Please, Wille, not now."
"That bullshit the royal court said clearly upset you and we need to talk about it."
Simon sat up. "No, we don't. I got it out of my system, I'm over it now, so you can drop it," he said harshly. Wille looked taken aback at the dismissive tone but he didn't relent.
"No, I can't fucking drop it. It's not okay, I will let mamma know nothing what they said was fucking okay!"
It was kind of sweet that Wille got so upset about it partly on behalf of him but Simon couldn't really appreciate it right now. He didn't want to fight. He sighed, exasperated. "Whatever, if that's what you need to do."
"I'm doing it for us, for you."
"I can take care of myself!" Simon rarely raised his voice like this. He might snap and scoff and hiss but he didn't like to shout. A little quieter, he added: "I don't need you to fight my battles for me."
Wilhelm came closer to the bed. "It's not just your battle, this concerns both of us and don't you think I care about how things affect you? And since you decided to involve me with whatever this was," he made a broad hand gesture, "I think it's fair for me to ask."
Now Simon felt bad. Goading Wille like this was not one of his proudest moments but they both had seemed to be into it and sure, maybe they should talk about it but Simon was not ready to examine that all. He wanted to sink under the covers. "I'm sorry. I don't know what I was thinking. Please don't be mad."
Wille looked at him wide-eyed and then his shoulders deflated, loosening his attack stance a little. Simon just realized how Wille coming at him all loud and aggressive had him feeling distressed and on edge, inching away from his towering form. He couldn't handle conflict. Was that his inner omega feeling that way or just him? Whatever it was, he didn't care right now.
Wilhelm sighed. "You don't need to apologise. I'm not mad at you, I'm mad about the whole situation."
"I understand, I am too but can you please be mad another time, I can't do this right now."
Wilhelm sat down and hesitantly laid a hand on his thigh. "What do you need?"
"You," Simon looked him directly in the eyes. "Just hold me?"
Wille nodded and crawled on the bed next to him. He struck his arms out and Simon laid his head down on his chest, enjoying the feel of his bare skin against him. Feeling Wille so close immediately calmed him down and he felt Wille's heartbeat slow down to a more relaxing rhythm as well. He closed his eyes and Wille was rubbing comforting circles with his thumb against Simon's forearm.
"I love you."
Simon tightened his arms around him.
"I love you."
"So, Simon, as a transfer student, how are you finding Hillerska?"
The dining room they were sat in was less pompous than the rest of the castle but by no means smaller. The food was served and passed around and Simon almost let the bowl drop in his hands when he was being addressed. He didn't expect the Queen to turn to him first and make small talk and ask him questions. Shit, he really did not prepare well enough for this!
"Um, it's good, there are very high standards, higher than at my previous school but um, I like the opportunities it gives me and I like the challenge." That was complimenting the school, not criticising it, right? Did he sound too eager? Or did that sound like he was dumb and uneducated? Was it good to appear ambitious or rather not? Simon wasn't sure about anything.
"Are you participating in any school activities, any sports?"
"Yes, I sing in the choir, I really enjoy it and I did rowing." He truly loved being in the choir, it was his little refuge, singing was his passion and the choir teacher has liked and supported him from the beginning, encouraging his voice and giving him solos. Better not say he quit rowing because he fucked up at a match once and was constantly insulted and looked down upon.
How much did they even know about him? Did Wilhelm tell them stuff about him or did they have some sort of secret spy agent feed them all information about him? Could they do that?
"Hm, I hear you have a beautiful voice, I hope I get to hear it some time."
Oh. Simon struggled to control his voice and his blush. "Uh, yes, thank you, Your Majesty."
"Kristina, please." She smiled at him and Simon smiled back tentatively. "Alright, thanks."
Holy shit, he was on first name basis with the Queen, did that mean he was accepted into the royal circle?
They were served a soup, presumably an appetizer, based on the two flat plates underneath. Simon waited until the others started to eat to see what they were doing. Was there a special, fancy way to eat as a royal, was there something he had to pay attention to? No one prepared him for this, why didn't Wille tell him anything?
So far it seemed safe as nothing was out of the ordinary and he picked up the only spoon and started eating. Normal table manners, don't do anything weird and don't start slurping!
"I remember the parties at Hillerska," Kristina continued, her gaze nostalgic. "There were always held at this place we called palatset, do you have that too?"
Simon turned to Wille who hasn't said a word yet at the dinner table and did not seem like he was about to now either so Simon took it upon himself to answer. "Yeah, I know that place." For better or worse, he thought.
"You know, Wilhelm, your mother wasn't always so proper and definitely not so innocent as she wants you to think. There were some wild and crazy parties, if I remember the stories correctly," Ludvig said, smiling teasingly at his wife and they both laughed.
"Oh please, don't give the boy any ideas." Kristina chuckled while she tried to dab her mouth with a napkin. Simon watched the exchange fascinated.
Wilhelm was still eating silently. Kristina reached out and put her hand on his, halting his movements. "Hey gubben, how are you?"
Wille did not try to pick up on the cheerful mood his parents presented. He said dryly without looking up: "I'm surprised you're even asking because you don't actually seem to care."
Kristina's smile dropped. "What? Of course I do. I want to know how you're feeling."
"Maybe you should ask Simon that after you humiliated him earlier."
"What are you talking about?"
Wille dropped his spoon and finally looked up to his mother. "You can't be serious about acting all nice and happy now after this afternoon like nothing happened. None of this is sincere, none of this is real."
Now both Kristina and Ludvig looked alarmed but Kristina quickly composed herself. She cleared her throat. "There is a time and a place to discuss that but I wanted us to have a nice meal together."
"You know, that's part of the problem. It's all this pretending and lying and keeping secrets that's tearing us apart. How we're protecting people or certain things and holding on to ideals that might not even be worth it."
Kristina frowned. "What - where is this coming from?"
"You're the one who told me to see a psychologist," Wilhelm accused his mother. Her eyes briefly turned to Simon as if she was wondering if he knew that and whether that was too personal information to share at the table before she spoke again, carefully weighing her words.
"Yes, because it's important to talk about your emotions and get to know them and understand how to handle them. And if there's anything you can always come to us, you can talk to us about everything."
"But that's not enough!" He shouted.
Silence.
"Don't you both understand that?"
Wilhelm looked at his parents consecutively but none of them said anything.
Simon did not dare to breathe.
A while no one at the table said anything and they continued eating in silence, only the clatter of the cutlery was heard. After they had finished eating the soup and the plates were carried away Kristina folded her hands and turned to them. "I apologise for any inconvenience or discomfort you might have felt earlier, that was not our intention."
Wilhelm did not react to it so Simon felt responsible to be the one to answer again. "Thank you, Your - um, Kristina, that is very appreciated." He believed her that she really was sorry even if she possibly didn't quite understand what they did wrong and still believed it was right. Unlike Wilhelm though, Simon was not interested in fighting or explaining it to her, he just wanted to get through this dinner in one piece.
She nodded in acknowledgement and then spoke up again, changing the subject. "Wilhelm, I have to remind you, the school's anniversary is very soon and we're all looking forward to your speech, I hope you're well prepared." Her voice wasn't exactly cold but it had lost some of that warmth from before, it was back to a more business, Queen-like tone. Simon could basically feel the rift and distance widening between them.
"Yes, mamma." Wilhelm kept his reply short, staring ahead.
"If you want, you could practice it with us, having an audience to be able to say the whole speech to might be helpful," Ludvig said.
Wille shook his head. "No, thanks, pappa."
And that was the end of it.
"I think I am finished now." Wilhelm sat upright in his chair, a clear indicator that this dinner was over.
"Wilhelm, come on, don't be so -"
His mother started but one look at her and she fell silent. Simon only saw it from the side but Wille's glare must have been potent if it shut the Queen up.
"Let's at least eat dessert together?" Wille's father tried but to no avail.
"We should get back, it's getting late." That was a dismissal if Simon had ever heard one. And now he was also getting included in Wilhelm's tiff.
"But Wil -"
"No." It was clipped and brusk. Wilhelm didn't even raise his voice significantly but the authority in his voice was unmistakable.
Ludvig and Kristina let their head down in a sign of surrender. Simon was a little surprised about them suddenly giving in and not trying to argue further. But then he realised Wille had been using his alpha voice and that was why.
And then he noticed the several times that has happened throughout the day. It was subtle, that's why he hasn't realized it sooner but it was there. Whenever Wille got loud and upset people either got quiet or tried to placate him. Simon thought before it was because he was the crown prince but that surely wouldn't matter to his parents. It must have been his alpha presence.
Simon didn’t know how things were before Wille's presentation and how his dynamic had been with his parents but now that he thought about it everyone seemed to avoid direct arguing with him. They were defensive maybe but always careful and considerate.
And now Wille was acting like an alpha who owned the place (which he didn't, not really or at least not yet).
And Simon wasn't sure how to feel about it.
It wasn't like Wille's words and anger weren't justified and held some truth and Simon always supported Wille speaking up and calling out injustice and hypocrisy (he taught him well) but it seemed to become about power now and him making decisions over Simon's head was something he couldn't support.
"Wille," he put a hand on his shoulder. "I'm okay with having dessert." He put on a smile as if he was totally fine and not affected by what was going on and was totally not going against his alpha crown prince boyfriend right now and basically telling him to shut up, sit and eat. Simon didn't know if it was going to be seen as a good move but he didn't care, he did not want to leave now with Wilhelm on bad terms with his parents.
And what did Wille expect - for him to say 'Simon, come, we're leaving' and for him to be trailing after Wille like a perfectly trained dog? Hell no!
Wilhelm turned to him with a mildly surprised look on his face that he couldn't hide. "Really?" Simon nodded. He half expected Wille to challenge him on this (he was the alpha after all and what he said was supposed to be followed, especially by an omega) but he let out a calming sigh and relented. "Alright."
Kristina smiled wide. "Wonderful, I'll let the chef know to bring it." She stood up and walked out through an open passageway.
Wilhelm's father also seemed pleased and when Kristina came back with the staff serving the dessert and they started eating and the atmosphere got a little lighter again, Simon thought he saw something in their looks at him that haven't quite been there before: approval and respect.
When they said goodbye he noticed those looks again and it filled him with a sense of relief and pride. As much as Simon tried to deny he didn't come here to gain any of that from them it still felt good. That maybe he wasn't just the poor, shameful, gay boy anymore but actually someone that mattered in their eyes. That maybe he was a suitable partner for their son. Even if it might was because he was an omega and more 'socially acceptable' now.
"Take care, we'll see you on Friday!" Kristina reminded Wilhelm. Oh yeah, it was the school's 120th anniversary celebration. It was going to be a huge event with the Queen and Prince Consort coming. At choir practice they were already rehearsing the Hillerska anthem for weeks. They all knew it by heart already but of course it was supposed to be absolutely perfect for the esteemed guests.
Simon and Wille got into the backseat of the car and waved goodbye one more time till the car doors closed and they could no longer be seen through the tinted windows. After a few minutes of driving in silence Simon decided to speak, Malin was still with them in the driver's seat but it was alone enough for him. She was Wille's bodyguard, it wasn't like she didn't know everything about his life already.
"Now I have to ask this - what the hell was that?"
Wille furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. "What?"
"Your outrage and going over my head making decisions that involve both of us. I told you before, I don't care that you're an alpha or the crown prince, I will not let you get away with this behavior."
Wille seemed at a loss for words for a moment. "What - I, I thought you wanted to leave. You were so miserable and I thought the last thing you wanted was to have dinner with my parents after their disrespect."
"Actually they were behaving much more respectfully than you."
"I was trying to get you out of this, I tried to help you," Wilhelm exclaimed.
"Do I need to say it again, I don't need you to fight my battles for me." If there was anything Simon truly hated it was people feeling entitlement over him and making assumptions, like they had any right to make decisions for him and order him around. And that was exactly what Wille was doing.
Wille stared at him, still shocked and then let out a sigh. He brought a hand up to his hair and pushed away some of the dark strands. "I'm sorry, I....they just make me so angry sometimes. And I couldn't bear to see you like this after what was said, I couldn't take their behavior any longer. And you didn't say anything in your defense so I felt like I had to."
"Of course you can argue with them, they're your parents. And you did have some valid points, I'm not gonna lie but I'm not gonna tell the Queen off on my first visit, that'd be crazy. I actually don't want them to hate me and make them change their minds and maybe decide to break us up after all."
"They won't," Wille said certainly. "But I think it would actually be good for them to hear some talkback from somebody else for once. And your opinions do matter."
"Okay, I will not hold back on my thoughts next time, if that's what you want?" Simon gave a twitch of his mouth, the trace of a smile and Wilhelm returned it before he got serious again.
"But," he started hesitantly, "are you really okay with being a secret for two years?"
"What - I said I didn't care about that." Why did Wille bring that up now?
"Yeah but you said before you don't want to go back to being my secret and I understand that. I can't ask that of you, dealing with all these things, the royal court and what it means to be with me. It's a lot and -"
Simon interrupted him. "I don't care. Yes, okay, I'm not thrilled about their plans but I want to be with you in whatever way, whether that's public or in secret. I just want to be with you." He took a hold of Wille's arm and looked at him insistently. "We can handle any complications, whatever happens, we're in this together, right?"
Wille slid his hand into Simon's and Simon grasped it tight. "Right." Wille confirmed.
After that was cleared up a comfortable silence washed over them as Simon looked out of the window, watching the lights as they reached the city outskirts.
They held hands the entire rest of the car ride.
The next few days consisted of Simon telling his mother about the visit and making it sound mostly pleasant, school and choir, telling his friends about the visit and getting to freak out about it with them until it was Thursday, the last normal school day and Simon's last choir practice before the big anniversary event.
He was honestly sick of the school anthem at this point, it would've been fun to maybe perform something new and fresh for once and his choir teacher had actually suggested to make a new version of the old song but that idea was quickly shut down by the school.
Officially because the school anthem was something everyone knew and could sing along to and on a day like this it was important to stick to tradition. Simon wondered who was actually behind that decision and whether it had something to do with certain royals attending.
Simon shouldered his bag and was ready to go home. Wilhelm was getting busier and more stressed because of his speech tomorrow so he was not going to see him today. He just walked out the door when he spotted Sara in the school hallway. She came towards him but Simon continued walking, keeping his head straight forward.
"Simon -"
"What do you want?" He snapped harshly.
"Simon, please." She followed him out the door in the direction of the bus stop. "Can you hear me out?"
He slowed down. Maybe he owed her at least that. They haven't spoken till that fateful day. He stopped and turned around to Sara who stood meek and unassertive, her face looking down at the gravel that she picked at with her shoes. "Okay, then talk."
"I just wanna tell you again how sorry I am. And I want you to know that I broke it off with August right on that day. I made a huge mistake, I don't know why, I wasn't thinking straight. You were right, he is never going to change."
Simon shrugged like he was indifferent and none of this mattered to him. "I'm glad. And now what?"
Was that supposed to make everything better? Just the idea of his sister with August made him sick and he did not want to spend time thinking about it.
Sara looked up at him. "How long until you forgive me?" She looked so sad and pitiful it hurt Simon. He wanted nothing more than have his big sister back at his side and laugh with her but they were still far away from that happening again.
"I don't know, I need time."
Her lips pulled into a pout, something that has always made him give in in the past. "Okay." It was obvious she had hoped for a more specific answer.
Simon narrowed his eyes. "You really hurt me, Sara. What you did isn't something I can just magically forget and forgive."
"Do you hate me?" She asked blunt and Simon recoiled. Only she could make him believe it was an honest question and that she was genuinely wondering about that. As if he could, as if it was that easy to just hate her and move on.
He sighed, the fight leaving his body. "I will never hate you, you're my sister, I will always love you but that doesn't change anything. I honestly don't know what is going to make this better again."
Sara nodded dejected. He almost thought she wasn't going to say anything more but then her expression changed into something like determination. "I know what I can do to set this right. Maybe that can help you forgive me." She turned around and walked towards the dorms with fast steps.
Simon was confused, what did she mean by that, setting this right? He had no clue and he was too exhausted to try and figure it out now.
He continued his walk to the bus stop when his phone dinged. He dug his phone out of his jean pocket and saw Wille had texted him, asking him to come over. Simon turned around again towards the Forest Ridge house, he wasn't going to say no to seeing his boyfriend, he could still take a later bus.
Some classmates looked at him weird when he walked through the corridors, he was a non-res, he had no reason to be there but no one said anything. No Vincent or August showed up to reprimand him and Simon ignored the looks. It's not like it was the first time.
When Willhelm opened his door he looked paler than usual and Simon could immediately tell he wasn't feeling well. "Hey, how are you, what's up?" He asked, concerned after he closed the door.
Wille rubbed a hand over his face. "It's just, I've tried practicing the speech but just the thought of doing it tomorrow made me sick and...I threw up."
"Oh."
He sat down on his bed and Simon chose the spot next to him, he struck his hand out and caressed Wille's shoulder.
Wille clenched his fists in frustration. "I hate feeling this anxious, I should be better than that. I'm the Crown Prince, it's expected of me but Erik was always better at this and now I'm also an alpha and I'm supposed to be this all confident, never afraid, strong role model but I'm not and what's worth an alpha crown prince who can't even get that right? But if I don't do the speech August will and if I let that happen I will feel like I failed everyone and everything."
He was glad they were at a point where Wilhelm felt comfortable enough to tell him these things and that he could be there for him. (But then, Wille was always more open about his struggles than Simon and maybe, Simon thought, he was ready to be more open too but now was not the time)
Simon kept his hand where it was. "You know that's bullshit, right? You're not less of an alpha because you have anxiety and that's not a weakness. You are so strong and brave."
Wille scoffed. "That's what you told me before I did the last speech and look how that turned out. I denied the video and us."
Okay, ouch. "And I don't blame you for it, I understand why you did it. I still believe you're brave."
Wille looked at him, his eyes weary, holding all the pressure that Simon could never truly relate to or get rid of.
"Can you hold me?"
"Of course."
They manouvered on the bed until they lied down. He knew when Wille asked this sometimes he wanted to be the one to hold somebody so Simon curled up and let him wrap his arms around him from behind. He tried to emit a calming scent and Wille buried his head in Simon's neck.
They stayed like this for a while until he felt lips press against his skin, more insistent each time. Simon whined when Wille bit down on his neck, leaving a sure hickey behind. He squirmed and found an erection pressing against him, Wille slowly sliding closer.
Simon turned his head to look at Wilhelm whose gaze was heated but hesitant. "Can I?" His hands lingered between his thighs.
Simon didn’t know exactly what Wille was asking but he nodded. He could tell Wille needed the physical distraction right now and he could feel himself becoming aroused as well.
He unzipped his jeans and Wille helped him tug them down along with his underwear. Then a hand wrapped around his dick and Simon gasped. The angle must have been a little awkward but Wille's fingers were exploring every inch and vein and it had Simon drive his hips shamelessly into the air.
"Ugh." His fingers glid over his tip which started leaking and he spread the precum around. Simon bucked his hips forward once again. "Please." Begging for something, he didn't know what.
But Wille seemed to hear his prayers and fully engulfed his hand around his length and created an enclosed space for Simon to rut against. It was warm and tight and felt wonderful. He kept thrusting, chasing that friction until he felt that familiar tingle in his body, signaling him what was to come.
Omegas were not known for lasting long but Simon has long forgotten to feel ashamed about that. With another powerful thrust and a groan he released into the palm of Wille's hand. He let his head fall back into the cushion, breathing heavily and just when he started feeling too sensitive Wilhelm removed his hand.
Simon recovered enough to turn around to Wilhelm and ask if he wanted a tissue but Wille shook his head. He tugged his sweatpants and underwear down and wrapped his sperm covered hand around his own dick. Fuck, something about Wille coating his dick with his come was really fucking hot. In the back of his mind Simon was thinking but safe, but condoms! but that voice wasn't loud enough for him to interrupt.
Wilhelm sat up and hovered above Simon who was now lying fully horizontal on the bed. "Can I?" He asked again and Simon gave him the same response as before. This time Wille's fingers wandered further and grazed his entrance, one entered him and coaxed a moan out of Simon's mouth. He has already been leaking slick so a second finger fit in easily.
Wille pumped his fingers inside him for a while but avoided his prostrate, this was obviously meant to prepare him and not for mere pleasure. A third finger slid in and Simon felt full but not full enough. When he finally removed his fingers Simon helplessly clenched around nothing. Wille had made him so desperate for his cock and he eagerly anticipated the stretch.
When he felt the tip against his hole he jumped slightly but he was opened enough to let Wille glide in inch by inch perfectly smooth with no haste. Simon whined impatiently as he felt his cock slowly fill him up.
"You feel so good around me, so perfect." Wille's voice was close as he spoke, tickling his curls and Simon whimpered. He tilted his head to the side, inviting Wille's lips on his neck again. Then his hips stopped moving and Wilhelm had finally fully sunk in.
For a moment Wille stayed still and let Simon feel the entire weight of his cock. He felt so full but it was just right, as always it was like they fit perfectly together in every way.
Slowly Wilhelm started moving, he almost pushed all the way out just to slam back in and it punched a gasp out of Simon. His thrusts kept grazing his prostrate but Wille kept up a teasing and slow rhythm which drove Simon crazy. This pace was unfamiliar as they have always been much too desperate and eager to keep it slow. And it was surely passionate but this felt different. Intimate. Vulnerable. Not that it wasn't the other times but oh, it was never like this.
Wille obviously wanted to savour it and not rush and Simon tried to adjust his patience. This wasn't about a quick release, it was about the close connection.
Wilhelm put his hands around his waist and Simon hissed lightly. Wille of course caught it and removed his hands and looked down. It had been a few days but there was still a faint outline of Wille's hands from their last...intimate moment at the palace. It didn't really hurt but it was still sensitive.
Wilhelm slipped out and Simon groaned quietly, he immediately missed the fullness. "Did I do that?" Wille's fingers hovered over the spot, the curve where he had grabbed him. He let his hand fill in the previous bruise with a featherlight touch. "I'm sorry."
Simon shook his head. "Don't be." How could he explain to Wilhelm that he had relished in that hint of pain and liked having the physical reminder of Wille's touch on his skin and that he kept looking at it in his bedroom and traced over the faded marks with his own fingers?
But then Wilhelm lowered his head and put his lips right over it. He glided over Simon's stomach until he reached the other side and left another tender kiss on the other bruise with Simon squirming underneath him.
But Wille didn't stop there. He kept peppering kisses all over Simon's torso and thighs and Simon was getting close again. He buried his hand in Wille's hair and let himself feel and get lost in Wille's soft gentle touch and devotion.
He needed just one more push, he didn't want to touch his cock, it was so sensitive already. He could feel his release just around the corner and that's when Wille glided back inside him and hit his spot. Once was enough and it had Simon spilling immediately.
Wille continued thrusting throughout his orgasm and Simon was shaking and moaning. The sweet pressure was just on the edge of too much but Simon wanted Wilhelm to come inside him.
"Simon," Wille breathed against his lips, not quite touching but hovering right in the space between them. He repeated his name, his voice shaky and his thrusts getting sloppier. Simon wrapped his hands around the back of his neck. "I'm here, I've got you."
Wille closed the small distance and put their lips together. His mouth was urgent, pressing against Simon with a need that was palpable. Simon relished in the position that he was in, being able to provide Wilhelm with pleasure and comfort which this time had nothing to do with his inner omega.
In fact, there was a significant lack of their second genders present. It didn't feel like the other times when they were trying to take over, it was purely them seeking closeness and assurance. There were no primal instincts nagging him, telling them how to feel or be or a power struggle which he felt the need to break out of, it was just them. There was no pressure and no expectations.
How it used to be, how it was supposed to be.
In the moment where Wille let go and gasped out his name again and was filling him up, Simon felt truly equal. Maybe it was silly and maybe it made no sense but it hit him right then. Simon was spent, there was no way he was coming again but he was on such a high that it felt like it. There was no liquid left to dribble out of him but that didn't stop him from experiencing yet another intensely pleasured high.
It felt like it was going on forever and even after that initial pleasure faded they didn't separate. Their bodies, coated with sweat clung to each other, their lips united and their hands wandering over each other's skin. Even when their lips disconnected they stayed close, their noses brushing, not wanting to break away, not bearing to be apart.
"How are you feeling?" Simon asked.
"Better," Wille answered.
Simon hummed against Wille's face, wearing a soft smile.
"Me too."
The next day was hectic. Simon almost woke up too late and he quickly put on his school uniform, doing a very sloppy tie and ran out to the bus stop. He only barely managed to catch the bus and found Rosh and Ayub sitting in the back, as usual.
"Hey, fancy man!" Ayub said when he saw him. "Is it a special day today?" Rosh asked and pointed to his uniform.
Simon sat down, catching his breath before he could answer. "It's the school anniversary today, 120th. The choir is singing and Wille is giving a speech. Even the Queen is attending."
They both nodded impressed. "Oh, your future mother-in-law," Rosh said, keeping a complete straight face.
Simon scoffed and pushed Rosh lightly with a barely suppressed grin. "Shut up."
She raised an eyebrow and looked to Ayub. "He's not denying it."
Ayub grinned. "Oh, is he turning red? He so is!" They laughed, making Simon look down and want to murder the two of them.
"I hate you both," he said, feigning annoyance.
They continued teasing him, still finding ways to sneak it in even when Simon managed to change the subject and they talked about something else. He appreciated how normal it felt, messing around on the bus with no one paying attention to them or caring about them. Bus rides to school has become their thing, a time the three of them spent together. It felt like real life before he entered the exclusive, elite world of Hillerska.
The little bit of reprieve Simon had with his best friends ended when he arrived at school. Everyone was running around for something, anxious anticipation filled the entire space. Preparations for the present day have been going on all week but everyone seemed especially on edge today. Their choir teacher absolutely wanted them to rehearse the song one more time and she kept tugging on her blouse the entire time.
For some reason Simon did not feel the same nervousness as his peers, he was almost relaxed. Maybe because he has already met the Queen and Prince Consort a few days ago and his nerves have been all but used up for that. There wasn't much for him to do today, just stand in the choir, sing and maybe look like he was having fun.
It was a big day for Wilhelm though, Simon hasn't seen him yet but he imagined he was probably holed up somewhere with the royal court and his parents, people floating all around him, tugging at him while trying to swallow down his fears.
They walked out on to the courtyard where a small stage was set up and tribunes for the students that were starting to fill up. Simon couldn't spot Sara anywhere amongst them. The choir had their own spot on the stairs right across from the royal family.
At 9am sharp they appeared, August included and took their assigned seats on the raised platform. Right, Simon had almost forgotten that August was now the second in line and therefore a part of any festivities whether they liked it or not. Simon could barely get a good look at Wille before the choir teacher gestured for them to start singing.
Once they finished the school anthem, the program was set for the headmistress to say a few words and then let Wilhelm have the stage.
Simon tilted his head to the side, looking at Wille. He did not look like he was ready, his hand kept alternating between tugging at the collar of his shirt and rubbing his chest. His lips were moving, talking to that guy from the royal court, Simon had no idea what he was saying but a moment later August stood up and adjusted his tie, wearing a smug smile on his face.
Simon furrowed his eyebrows. Was Wille really going to let August do the speech? He looked so unwell Simon wanted to go up there and hug him and reassure him that everything was going to be alright but he was rooted to the spot.
August has barely made it three steps when Wille suddenly stood up and made his way to the podium.
His face and body language has magically transformed and he exuded all the assurance and confidence of a regal alpha. He buttoned up his blazer with one hand and turned his head to glare at August that was so obviously and brazenly telling him to sit back down and left no doubt about who was in charge.
Simon has seen glimpses of Wille's authoritarian side and has felt conflicting things about it. Mostly he fought and protested against it when it felt like it was Wilhelm acting like he owned him. There was this fire inside him that made Simon be instantly defiant when he felt his own autonomy threatened, something that his omega instincts couldn't override.
So when Wille was being all loud and controlling, no matter to whom it grated him. He knew that was always going to be an ongoing battle for Wille to fight that side of him but Simon has also seen him use it to stand up, not just for himself but for Simon as well and he couldn't deny that it didn't leave him feeling important and cared for. That there was someone who cared so much about you and was so passionate and could under no circumstances let anything go and fought so hard on your behalf and for justice. It felt good having someone on your side willing to do anything.
And so this display of cold alpha arrogance directed towards August was absolutely satisfying to watch. Wilhelm kept walking in all his Crown Prince glory and Simon couldn't help but feel a sense of pride. What could he say, any type of humiliation for August to experience was a win in his eyes.
He took another glance around the crowd but there were still no signs of Sara anywhere. Where was she?
After a moment of silence Wille started talking, fluent and clear, he didn't even need the cards he was holding. No one would've thought anxiety was plaguing him just a few minutes ago. He was doing well, Simon thought and apparently so did the Queen and the Prince Consort and the Royal Court according to their pleased expressions.
He had been talking about the school motto and taking responsibility and taking on traditions when he stopped in the middle of the sentence, his head looking down at the cards presumably, until he eventually whispered out one word that was easily picked up by the microphone. "No."
Wille shook his head and repeated it. "No."
What?
People around Simon started putting their heads together and whispering.
"But that's a problem."
Was he going off script? The panicked and confused looks of the Queen and the others said yes.
"It's a problem when we just pass on traditions without stopping to think about which ones are good and which ones are bad. How do we create nuanced thinking and new ideals if we don't get to investigate and question our history? If we must follow traditions at all costs how are we supposed to evolve?"
Yes, he was definitely going off script.
"In order to hold them up we keep secrets from each other. We lie. We pretend to protect each other because we're afraid of what could happen if we didn't. We're afraid of the consequences. I'm scared as well."
Wilhelm looked around the crowd. "But I don't want to be like that anymore. It ends now." His voice loud and unwavering.
Taut silence followed with no one daring to cut in.
Simon couldn't see Wille's face, what exactly was he planning?
"It was me." Wille cleared his throat. "In the video. With, with Simon."
He didn't.
Simon's breath hitched. Shocked murmurs went through the crowd. Immediately after he felt the flash of a camera pointed at his face.
"It was a moment I didn't want to share with anyone else so I lied about it. But it was me." He said again with more conviction.
The royal court was trying to get the cameras to stop rolling but it was no use. Even if they did, enough students had taken out their phone and started recording Wille. But Simon knew there were probably enough filming him too, unease started filling him.
Wille slowly turned around to look at him. There was a determined, confident look on his face and a smile started forming. He seemed happy....? Relieved? Whatever it was, it seemed to be a good thing.
Wilhelm spoke the truth. Told everyone at Hillerska and potentially the entire world about them. He just did that.
And he was smiling at Simon.
Telling him it was a good thing.
The world around him faded away and he allowed himself to focus only on Wilhelm. Simon had been right, Wilhelm was strong and brave.
His frown slowly started to evaporate. He smiled back.
More cameras were flashing.