Work Text:
Han Sooyoung audibly sighed. It was unusual to receive new students midway through the year. It was even more troublesome when said student refused to utter a word.
Sometimes she really regretted choosing the occupation of a kindergarten teacher as her career.
Yoo Joonghyuk, that was the new student’s name. The child’s hand was unwillingly held by Han Sooyoung’s, as she led him to the classroom.
Yoo Joonghyuk was a few centimetres taller than the average height of the rest of the student, his features more mature as well. If Han Sooyoung wasn’t his teacher, she would’ve assumed he was a year or two older than his current age.
Upon stepping foot into the classroom, Han Sooyoung watched the boy scan the area, eyes drifting from one student to another, to the brightly coloured furniture and the pastel yellow walls filled with ‘encouraging’ posters.
The students were clustered in the middle of the classroom, seated in rows of three. At the sides of the classroom were tables, presumably for the children to work on various worksheets assigned to them.
The wall opposite of where Yoo Joonghyuk was standing was made of glass, a view of the outside visible.
His vision soon rested on a boy, visibly smaller than everybody else, seated cross footed, no different from everyone else. He was placed at the back of the horde of students, despite being one of the shortest. He seemed to be spacing out, eyes lingering on a spot behind Yoo Sangah, the co-form teacher of the class.
“Hey, Joonghyuk. Why don’t you introduce yourself to the class?” Han Sooyoung whispered, patting the boy on the back, injecting false sweetness into her voice as she plastered a smile on her face.
Yoo Joonghyuk shook his head, looking at his teacher with some sort of glare. Han Sooyoung prayed nobody noticed the vein throbbing at her forehead as she continued to urge Yoo Joonghyuk.
Finally, Yoo Joonghyuk relented, his frown deepening as he walked towards the front of the class, guided by Han Sooyoung, who was noticeably relieved from the sigh she released.
Yoo Sangah beamed at the child, telling him to tell the class his name, as well as his hobbies and interests, as other children stared at him in curiosity.
“I’m Yoo Joonghyuk. I like to play action games.” He murmured, voice barely louder than a whisper. He stared at the students in front of him, as they stared back, before Yoo Sangah ushered him into the pack of students, guiding him to the back, so that he wouldn’t block the other students.
“He said his name was Yoo Joonghyuk, and he likes action games! Let’s welcome him into our class, hm?” Yoo Sangah echoed after him, as Han Sooyoung watched on in amusement from the sidelines.
Soon, class resumed, Yoo Sangah continuing to teach the children basic vocabulary.
——
“Alright, let’s get everyone to split up into pairs for the worksheet!”
A crowd soon formed around Yoo Joonghyuk, the kids Yoo Joonghyuk didn’t even know the name of asking him to pair up with them. All except one. The same boy who had been dozing off when Yoo Joonghyuk entered was sitting at a table at the far side of the classroom, attempting the worksheet by himself.
Yoo Joonghyuk ignored the other children chattering endlessly around him, as he watched the teacher- the one with short black hair and a lavender hoodie whom he had not remembered the name of- head to the boy’s side and say something inaudible, causing a small smile to appear on the boy’s face.
Eventually, Yoo Joonghyuk diverted his attention from the boy to the people around him,finally relenting and partnering with a girl, inky hair tied up in a high ponytail. She told him to refer to her as ‘Jihye-ah’, and that his expression reminded her of a monster, but she liked monsters. (Yoo Joonghyuk did not know whether or not to take offence at that.)
Their worksheet was completed relatively quickly, most of the effort put in by Yoo Joonghyuk, as Lee Jihye incessantly yammered on about a new toy sword her parents had bought her a few days ago.
When they handed in the worksheet to the lady with silky long brown hair, Yoo a Joonghyuk allowed Lee Jihye to take credit for the effort. He didn’t mind.
The only other person who had handed in the work was the boy Yoo Joonghyuk had been fixated on previously, whose name was Kim Dokja, according to Lee Jihye. ‘Dokja’, as in reader. It suited him, considering how Kim Dokja could be seen engrossed in a book, flipping through its pages, when Yoo Joonghyuk and Lee Jihye headed back to their table.
Lee Jihye soon left Yoo Joonghyuk, heading to another table where another pair of children sat, one girl, noticeably taller than Lee Jihye, her jet black hair tied into a bun, and a male, who oddly reminded Yoo Joonghyuk of a golden retriever.
Yoo Joonghyuk’s eyes flitted from them to Kim Dokja, who was now talking to the teacher in the jacket, proceeding to stand up since the lady gestured for him to, and… oh. Were they walking his way? And, oh god, they were standing in front of him now.
Kim Dokja was timidly staring at the floor, hands clenching the bottom of his plain white t-shirt. The teacher, on the other hand, was practically radiating a joyful aura. She had a bright smile on, as if she had just conjured a jaw dropping idea to end world hunger.
“Hey, Yoo Joonghyuk!” She addressed him in a cheerful tone. “This is Kim Dokja, I don’t think you two have met.” She continued. Kim Dokja avoided Yoo Joonghyuk’s eyes, mouthing a silent ‘hi’.
“Well, you guys seem to like each other! I’ll leave you guys to talk then!”
Yoo Joonghyuk raised an eyebrow at her words, about to protest, but was unable to do so as the woman had already left and went to check on another group of students.
Directing his attention to Kim Dokja, he said, “sit.” Kim Dokja flinched, startled at Yoo Joonghyuk’s voice, before abiding and sliding into the chair opposite Yoo Joonghyuk.
Yoo Joonghyuk had no intention of starting a conversation with Kim Dokja, nor interacting with him at all. And so they sat in silence, as Kim Dokja fidgeted with his fingers, which were placed on the table.
“Will you stop doing that?” At his words, Kim Dokja seemed close to tears. His lips started trembling, as Yoo Joonghyuk’s expression became darker.
‘Don’t cry. I swear to god if you cry.’ Yoo Joonghyuk inwardly thought, as he continued staring at Kim Dokja’s deteriorating expression. But alas, the heavens seemed to have something against him as tears started flowing from Kim Dokja’s eyes, and a wail escaped his throat.
Yoo Joonghyuk watched him in horror as Yoo Sangah hurriedly came to their table. Yoo Joonghyuk sealed his mouth, lips forming a straight line as Yoo Sangah consoled Kim Dokja in front of him, the other children crowding around him as well. He felt as if he was viewing them like a movie, like he was a spectator not part of this world.
Their voices wavered in and out of his ears, growing faint before he snapped back to reality, when a piercing voice rang through his ears.
“Joonghyuk, what happened?” The black-haired teacher came over, her tone worried yet harsh. Yoo Joonghyuk found that he was unable to speak.
“Joonghyuk?” The voice was more concerned now, due to the lack of response from Yoo Joonghyuk.
“I didn’t do anything.” Yoo Joonghyuk finally answered, his words coming out defensive, as he pulled his arm away from Han Sooyoung’s grip.
He looked at Kim Dokja, whose eyes were red, and felt a pang of guilt. It was true. He hadn’t done anything. It was Kim Dokja’s fault. Why was he crying? Did he have it out for him? Or was it all planned by the woman when she brought the scrawny boy to his table? Did she purposely want to humiliate him?
An unexplainable rage built up inside of Yoo Joonghyuk, as he watched the other students glare at him with accusatory eyes. He didn’t realise he was clenching his fists, as he glared back at them.
It was odd. He was in a class full of people, yet he felt so utterly alone. Then, the person who was the sole cause of this incident spoke up.
“It’s true. …Joonghyuk didn’t- he didn’t do anything.” Kim Dokja piped up, fumbling over his own words. Yoo Joonghyuk blinked. Why? Wasn’t this his intention? To cause Yoo Joonghyuk harm? So why was he now denying it?
“Hah… alright. Everyone get back to their work.” Han Sooyoung gave Kim Dokja one last glance to check on his well-being, before shaking her head, heading off.
Kim Dokja didn’t say anything to Yoo Joonghyuk after that, wiping the remaining tear stains on his cheeks and walking away.
——
Yoo Joonghyuk disliked Kim Dokja. He wouldn’t call it hate, yet it wasn’t light enough to be called neutrality. It had been a month since he had transferred to the kindergarten, and majority of the children had backed off, no longer requesting for him to join their group when they were allowed to for work.
Yoo Joonghyuk had realised Kim Dokja was more or less excelling in English, whereas he wasn’t as proficient in other subjects. He was humble, refusing to take praise from teachers when they complimented him. Yoo Joonghyuk thought this could be part of Kim Dokja’s plan to receive more attention from teachers.
It didn’t seem like his plan was going well, though. He noticed that some students had not taken a liking to Kim Dokja, whispering unkind words about him behind the victim’s back.
Kim Dokja didn’t have many friends either. Due to there being an odd number of students in the class, Kim Dokja never had a partner during pair work. Yoo Joonghyuk thought Kim Dokja only had himself to blame. He was always so introverted, never bothering to initiate a conversation with others. Obviously he would not have formed good relations with the other students.
Yoo Joonghyuk fiddled with the edge of a paper rose he was holding. They were being taught how to make the roses in arts and craft class that day.
Yoo Joonghyuk’s mother often made him such paper crafts and such, and he had this picked up how to make some of them, allowing him to complete the activity faster than the others.
Using the extra paper he had by his side, Yoo Joonghyuk absentmindedly folded a paper crane, plane white in colour. He nudged it, moving it to stand beside the rose, coloured a shade of plum.
He stared at the two objects, mind drifting away to other things, such as what he would do once he went home, what his mother might cook for dinner, or which pieces of homework he would complete first.
After a while, he noticed that the other students had completed their folded roses as well, and were passing them around to their friends. He then glanced at his own rose. ‘ I’ll give mine to Mia when I get home.’ He thought, a picture of his sister, just two years younger than him, appearing in his mind.
“Uhm… Joonghyuk-ah.’
Yoo Joonghyuk whipped his head up, eyes laying on the person who had uttered his name. Nobody apart from his family had addressed him that casually before.
Kim Dokja.
Kim Dokja was standing in front of him, hands cupping his own paper rose, pitch black in colour. He didn’t seem as afraid as their previous interaction, a small smile on his face, although he still seemed a bit hesitant.
“What.”
Kim Dokja’s expression grew rather uncertain at the cold, one-worded answer, before he drew in a breath, steeling himself.
“Ah… have this.” Kim Dokja said, gently laying the rose on Yoo Joonghyuk’s table, beside the other two folded papers.
Yoo Joonghyuk was caught off guard for a second, eyebrows lifting in surprise as his eyes flitted to the rose. It was well-made, almost good enough to be compared to his own.
“I-if you don’t like it, I’ll take it back.” Kim Dokja muttered, as he hastily took the rose with his right hand.
Yoo Joonghyuk grabbed his hand, stopping it as he used his other hand to grab the rose back. Kim Dokja flinched at his touch, and Yoo Joonghyuk noticed this. He bit his bottom lip, retracting his hand. Why did he grab the rose? He didn’t know.
“It's… nice.” Yoo Joonghyuk murmured. “…here.” He continued, picking up the paper crane and placing it in Kim Dokja’s palm.
Kim Dokja’s face visibly brightened, as he admired the crane. He whispered a quick ‘ thank you .’, before scurrying away. It reminded Yoo Joonghyuk of a cute mouse.
Yoo Joonghyuk felt the material of the paper rose given to him, and for some reason, he liked this one more than the one he made, despite its handiwork being more sloppy.
When Yoo Joonghyuk returned home that day, he carefully stored the rose into a box, filled with other significant items he had gained over the years, be it family pictures or travel souvenirs his parents had given him from their travels before he was born.
——
Another month had passed. Yoo Joonghyuk didn’t dislike Kim Dokja anymore. However, he wouldn’t say he particularly liked him either.
He occasionally talked to him during their break time, although it was more formal than friendly, from Yoo Joonghyuk’s side, that was.
Apart from that, Yoo Joonghyuk mostly spent the breaks everyday alone. He would stay at his seat, at the corner of the classroom, beside the glass panelled wall.
Yoo Joonghyuk observed the other students, cheerfully playing with toys they had brought from home, or playing other games such as tag. The two teachers had left a moment ago, presumably for administrative matters.
The students were the same as always, nothing much to see, until something caught Yoo Joonghyuk’s eye.
Kim Dokja, who was usually huddled on the floor among the other kids, although it was clear he was isolated, was playing tag with another boy.
Well, they weren’t really playing. It seemed more one-sided. Kim Dokja was saying something Yoo Joonghyuk couldn’t hear, yet his facial expression was clear. It was a mix of fear and worry. The other boy, whose name was… Song Minwoo? Yes, that was it.
Song Minwoo had a mischievous glint in his eye, a smirk on his face, as he pushed Kim Dokja around, acting as if they were simply playing around.
Yoo Joonghyuk didn’t approach or stop them, no, on the opposite, he stood by, curious as to what Kim Dokja would do, what the 6 year old would do to get himself out of the mess.
Turns out, he would do absolutely nothing. After Song Minwoo gave him a hard shove, Kim Dokja tumbled to the floor, hands guarding his head and his eyes squeezed shut, before letting out a meek cry.
Yoo Joonghyuk’s eyes widened, as Song Minwoo made no effort to help him up, laughing as he walked away to his friends.
Two girls and a boy rushed to Kim Dokja, helping him up, as they, as well as Yoo Joonghyuk, noticed the scrape on the former’s knee, blood trickling down Kim Dokja’s knee.
At the sight of the blood, one girl screamed while the other started acting frantically, releasing Kim Dokja’s hand, which she had been holding previously. The boy was equally surprised, as he looked around for the teacher, who was nowhere to be seen.
Yoo Joonghyuk sighed, as he pushed his chair back, pacing towards Kim Dokja.
“Come on.” He said, grabbing Kim Dokja’s wrist and leaving the other children behind as the two left the classroom.
Yoo Joonghyuk glanced at Kim Dokja’s face, where there were hints of tears at the edges of his eyes.
They soon arrived at the medical office, which Yoo Joonghyuk had noticed once when he was leaving the kindergarten.
When Yoo Joonghyuk opened the door, he came face to face with a doctor, hair white as snow, silky strands reaching her waist.
“He scraped his knee.” Yoo Joonghyuk said, gesturing to Kim Dokja as he gave little to no explanation about how it occured.
The lady, who Yoo Joonghyuk would later come to know as Lee Seolhwa-ssi, questioned his class, before picking up her phone and presumably sending a text to his teacher.
Then, she tended to Kim Dokja’s wound, running his knee under running water for approximately 5 minutes, then applying antibacterial ointment when the knee dried, and finally covering the knee with a bandage.
By the time she was done, Han Sooyoung had abruptly opened the door, panting, as her eyes moved from Kim Dokja to Lee Seolhwa to Yoo Joonghyuk.
“I leave the class alone for two minutes and this happens.” She muttered under her breath, before sighing and questioning Kim Dokja on the matter.
When Kim Dokja revealed nothing, she turned to Yoo Joonghyuk. Yoo Joonghyuk looked at Kim Dokja, whose eyes pleaded with him not to say anything.
“He was pus-”
“-I fell.” Kim Dokja said, ignoring the glare Yoo Joonghyuk gave him.
Han Sooyoung knew something was off. It was blatantly obvious. Kindergarteners were absolutely shit at lying, anyways. But she trusted that Kim Dokja, being the good kid he was, would tell her if something really was the matter.
Yoo Joonghyuk, on the other hand, absolutely loathed Kim Dokja at that moment. Kim Dokja shouldn’t have lied, in his opinion. He should let Song Minwoo get his just deserts, and be punished for pushing him.
Kim Dokja didn’t say anything to him, and simply stared at the ground as Han Sooyoung guided them back to the classroom.
Yoo Joonghyuk really didn’t understand Kim Dokja sometimes. The moment he thought they had finally reached a mutual understanding, Kim Dokja would go and do something like that.
——
If there was anything Yoo Joonghyuk had learnt from the 4 months he had been in the same class as Kim Dokja, it was that Kim Dokja didn’t exactly have the best family.
He probably wouldn’t have known this if it wasn’t for one day.
Yoo Joonghyuk’s mother was late to pick him up that day. Dismissal was at four in the afternoon, but it was already six in the evening, and he was still in the classroom.
The one other person who was still there was Kim Dokja.
They were both alone together, with the exception of Han Sooyoung sitting in the corner with Yoo Sangah as they chatted softly.
Kim Dokja was reading again, having started a new book that day. It was thin, roughly 50 pages, just like the other books he usually read. Yoo Joonghyuk was by his side, eyeing the pages, as he read as well, having nothing else to do.
Occasionally, a humorous moment in the book would occur, and Kim Dokja would release a small chuckle.
Yoo Joonghyuk liked Kim Dokja’s laugh. It reminded him of joy, a room full of closely-knit people, laughing along at inside jokes.
Another teacher whom Yoo Joonghyuk didn’t recognise popped her head into the classroom, calling Kim Dokja to leave, as his parents had arrived.
Kim Dokja abided, his smile dying down as he closed his book shut and grabbed his book. He bid Yoo Joonghyuk goodbye, to which Yoo Joonghyuk responded with a small wave.
After Kim Dokja left the classroom, Yoo Joonghyuk’s eyes drifted, to rest on a water bottle not belonging to him. It was Kim Dokja’s. It was plastic, with a scratched and faded image of a squid on it.
Yoo Joonghyuk grabbed it, and headed out of the classroom, as Han Sooyoung looked at him, calling for him not to leave, not that Yoo Joonghyuk abided.
As he reached the exit of the school, he noticed Kim Dokja in the distance, standing before a tall man. A few metres away from the father and son, Yoo Joonghyuk stopped.
Something was wrong.
The man was shouting at Kim Dokja, as Kim Dokja, whose face wasn’t visible to Yoo Joonghyuk, stared at the ground, as if there was an interesting image engraved on the floor.
Before Yoo Joonghyuk could react, the man had brought his hand to Kim Dokja’s face, hitting him with quite a lot of might, it seemed, since Yoo Joonghyuk could hear the sound, flinching.
Kim Dokja’s shoulders quivered, as he seemed to be wiping his cheeks.
Yoo Joonghyuk took in a breath, before rushing over to the two.
“Dokja-yah.” He had never addressed Kim Dokja like that before.
“You forgot your water bottle.” He said, shoving the bottle into Kim Dokja’s hands, finally getting a good look of Kim Dokja’s expression.
Kim Dokja’s face was tear-stained, cheek red from the slap previously. His eyes were widened from the sudden appearance of Yoo Joonghyuk, as he opened his mouth to say something.
“T-thank you.” He stuttered, as Yoo Joonghyuk gave him a worried glance, revealing emotion to the boy for the first time.
Yoo Joonghyuk didn’t know what to do after that. He turned to glare at the man, who seemed enraged, before leaving, throwing one more worried glance at Kim Dokja.
Kim Dokja didn’t come to school the next day.
——
Yoo Joonghyuk had known Kim Dokja for half a year now. After Kim Dokja had returned to school, Yoo Joonghyuk had convinced him to reveal everything to him. What he was going to do with the information, he himself was unsure.
He found that as he spent more time with Kim Dokja, he cared for him more. But that’s what happens when friends get to know each other better, right? No, acquaintances was a better word.
Yoo Joonghyuk didn’t want to call them friends. If he did, that would mean he had a friend for the first time. What would he do then? What exactly were friends? If he called him a friend, then he would have to care for him, and Yoo Joonghyuk might just get attached. And one day, Kim Dokja would leave him.
And so, Yoo Joonghyuk convinced himself that the only reason he cared for Kim Dokja was because of the worry he had for him, regarding the event he had witnessed. He simply felt bad for him, which was why he partnered up with the boy during pair work, so Kim Dokja wouldn’t feel lonely. Yes. That was the sole reason.
“Kim Dokja. Your answer is wrong.” Yoo Joonghyuk said, pointing at a multiple choice question, where Kim Dokja had scrawled the letter C in the brackets, when the answer was quite obviously A.
“Ah… Joonghyuk-ah, you’re so good at math.” Kim Dokja praised him, as he erased his answer, putting in the letter A instead.
Yoo Joonghyuk scoffed, as he continued working on the worksheet with Kim Dokja. Unlike the other students, Kim Dokja didn’t completely rely on Yoo Joonghyuk like he was a resource which could simply dispense answers.
Yoo Joonghyuk liked that about Kim Dokja.
Just as they finished the worksheet, after a while of Kim Dokja attempting questions and Yoo Joonghyuk correcting him, Yoo Sangah, at the front of the classroom, called for the class’s attention.
“Next week we’re having a maths competition. However, it’s not like the previous ones we’ve done. We’ll be doing it in teams.”
“Yeah, to foster teamwork and whatnot.” Han Sooyoung added.
Kim Dokja peeked at Yoo Joonghyuk, and Yoo Joonghyuk could already tell what the former was thinking.
“Hah… let’s partner, Kim Dokja.” Yoo Joonghyuk said, locking eyes with Kim Dokja. Kim Dokja beamed, nodding his head vigorously.
“You guys can do it in pairs or trios, it doesn’t really matter since it’s a friendly competition.”
The class started buzzing, discussing who they would partner with, and who the smartest in terms of mathematics was in the class. Within a matter of minutes, the teams participating had been formed.
Yoo Joonghyuk noticed that himself and Kim Dokja were the only people participating in a duo. It was fine. The rest of the students weren’t as knowledgeable as him anyways.
Kim Dokja, on the other hand, seemed rather anxious. Although Yoo Joonghyuk couldn’t tell what exactly was going on in the reader’s mind, he affirmed Kim Dokja that they would win easily, and that he had nothing to be worried about.
Kim Dokja looked at him blankly, before slowly nodding. Perhaps Yoo Joonghyuk had thought wrongly. They weren’t particularly close anyways, nor could Yoo Joonghyuk read his mind.
——
It was the day of the competition. Yoo Joonghyuk had pretty much forgotten about it. 6 year olds didn’t tend to have a relatively substantial memory. He was only reminded of it when he overheard other children talking about it on the day of the event.
It didn’t seem as if Kim Dokja had any remembrance of signing up for the competition either from the gape he gave when Yoo Joonghyuk mentioned it in passing to him.
And so now, school was over, and the two boys were sitting dumbfoundedly at a table among 6 other children, separated into two groups amongst themselves, completely unprepared.
The atmosphere was cheerful, contrary to the anxiety Yoo Joonghyuk felt. He had told his mother of the upcoming contest, and what would she think of him if he brought back bad news? Would she look down on him for not clenching the winning spot? Yoo Joonghyuk didn’t want to find out.
He felt sweat trickle down his forehead, as Han Sooyoung placed a thin sheet of paper on front of him and Kim Dokja, before backing away from them, and alerting the group that they were able to start.
When Yoo Joonghyuk laid his eyes on the paper, his mind went blank. Odd. The letters of the words seemed to scramble, forming a foreign phrase of a different language. The shapes on the worksheet became complex diagrams, lines arching out in random squiggles.
Faint sounds of the nearby children quietly discussing the questions in hushed tones drifted in and out of his ears, accompanied by a never ending shrill ring.
Then, a tap on his shoulder. A concerned face with lips moving, questioning whether he was alright. That feeling of comfort Yoo Joonghyuk rarely received.
Yoo Joonghyuk blinked, air finally entering his body once again, reality crashing back into his system. The questions reversed back to normal, as if they had never changed in the first place. The sounds became constant, no longer seeming as if he was underwater, the spoken words said by people on land directly above him, the water surface separating them.
“I think the answer is A.” Kim Dokja said, as he directed Yoo Joonghyuk’s attention back to the test.
Yoo Joonghyuk blinked, before affirming his answer. For once, Kim Dokja had given a correct answer. Yoo Joonghyuk scribbled in the letter ‘A’ into the brackets provided, before moving his eyes to the next question.
They were all addition and subtraction questions, with an occasional simple word problem. Within fifteen minutes, the pair completed the worksheet, about the same time as the rest.
With a bright smile on her face, Yoo Sangah collected their worksheets, glancing at their answers. Her face was indiscernible, as she scanned the front page.
“We’ll announce the winners tomorrow.” She announced, before ushering the children out of the classroom.
“I’m confident in our answers on the first page.” Kim Dokja said, as he trailed behind Yoo Joonghyuk, exiting the classroom.
Yoo Joonghyuk didn’t reply.
——
“ Wow, Joonghyuk-ie, you’re so talented!”
A woman with hazel brown hair untied, length reaching her waist. The lady was taller than other mothers Yoo Joonghyuk had seen, with a better physique as well.
Yoo Joonghyuk’s mother, standing in front of him, reviewing a drawing Yoo Joonghyuk had made in class that day.
Yoo Joonghyuk was 4. His sister had just been born a few months ago, and was curled up in crib, incoherent babbles occasionally leaving her mouth as she slept.
Yoo Joonghyuk’s mother had a pleased smile, as she returned the paper back to him, ruffling his hair.
Yoo Joonghyuk contentedly grinned back. He loved his mother’s smile. It was joyous and sincere. She never put up a facade, voicing her emotions whenever she needed to.
It gave Yoo Joonghyuk this feeling, which warmed his heart. He liked this emotion. It was much different from what he felt when his mother scolded him.
When Yoo Joonghyuk’s mother reprimanded him, it would feel like his whole world was crashing. Uncontrollable tears would well up in his eyes, as a piercing wail was let out.
He absolutely hated it, not having control over his emotions, being vulnerable and weak when he cried. So he vowed to put up a barrier between his feelings and reality.
Those stupid emotions would be encased in a cage, kept away, as if they were raging monsters which should be separated from humanity.
But being the person who birthed him, his mother was the only one who could tear down Yoo Joonghyuk’s defenses.
Yoo Joonghyuk despised the fact that he had a weakness.
——
“Aw, we lost.” The sound of Kim Dokja’s voice could be heard, as Yoo Joonghyuk stared a hole into the worksheet.
If they had gotten one more question correct, they would have tied with the winning students. Yoo Joonghyuk crumpled the corner of the paper, before smoothing it back.
Kim Dokja didn’t seem to care much about the loss, humming a nursery rhyme as he absorbed the words Han Sooyoung was saying at the front.
Yoo Joonghyuk on the other hand, couldn’t care less what the teacher was saying. He was flipping through the pages, eyeing all his mistakes, the careless ones which he could’ve gotten correct.
He loathed the person he was a day ago, who was utterly oblivious to the error he had made. How would his mother react upon witnessing his carelessness? Would she be disappointed? Yoo Joonghyuk’s lower lip quivered just thinking of it.
He continued looking through the worksheet over and over again, desperate to find an error in the marking, until, the gods blessed him.
There was a calculation mistake on the third page. Where Yoo Joonghyuk and Kim Dokja should’ve gotten 5 marks, they had gotten 4.
He abruptly stood up, his chair scraping behind him, interrupting Han Sooyoung.
“Yoo Joonghyuk? Is something wrong?” Yoo Sangah, who had been standing at the back of the class, approached him.
“An error.” Yoo Joonghyuk frantically gestured to the third page, as he pointed out the mistake in calculation.
Yoo Sangah widened her eyes, as she pulled out a pen, it’s ink crimson red, and corrected her mistake in marking.
“Good eye, Yoo Joonghyuk!” Yoo Sangah exclaimed, as she handed the paper back to him. “It seems the competition had a tie. Not only did Hyunsung and Heewon win, Dokja and Joonghyuk did too!”
The class started murmuring amongst themselves, as Kim Dokja smiled brightly.
It reminded Yoo Joonghyuk of his mother’s smile.
“Joonghyuk-ah! We won! We won!” Kim Dokja squealed, as he punched his fists in the air. To top it all of, Kim Dokja hugged Yoo Joonghyuk in an embrace. His touch was warm, filled with enthusiasm.
Yoo Joonghyuk couldn’t help but smile as well, just a tiny bit.
“We tied. We didn’t win.”
“What? Same thing.”
Yoo Joonghyuk nodded, letting out a scoff at Kim Dokja’s smallmindedness.
He was happy.
When he got home, he told his mother about the results. He was praised and awarded with a pat on the shoulder, but after that, his mother left to tend to the housework and chores.
Sure, Yoo Joonghyuk was slightly let down by his mother’s reaction, but he understood that his mother had other things to do. Not everything was about him.
Following that, things seemed to get worse and worse.
First, Kim Dokja stopped coming to the kindergarten, his teacher explaining that there were some family issues when personally questioned by Yoo Joonghyuk.
Then, Yoo Joonghyuk broke his favourite cup. It was raven black in colour, and made of glass. When he was carrying it to the dining table, he had accidentally let go of it, and it shattered into a million tiny pieces, cutting his feet as well.
As the blood slid down his feet, he winced, as he tried to exit the area, stepping on more shards in the process. After his mother ensured he was alright, he was heavily reprimanded.
And now, he was sitting on the floor of the classroom, panting, as he held his head, which was throbbing. The boy sitting opposite him was in an even worse state. His nose was bleeding, his lips matching. Tears endlessly poured from Song Minwoo’s eyes, as other students stood away in terror
Han Sooyoung soon came into the class, Lee Seolhwa by her side. The doctor let out a gasp of surprise, before tending to Song Minwoo, whose injuries were more severe, and throwing instructions to Han Sooyoung on how to take care of Yoo Joonghyuk’s forehead.
About fifteen minutes later, class had resumed, and Han Sooyoung had dragged Yoo Joonghyuk out of the classroom.
Yoo Joonghyuk treated Han Sooyoung’s words as white noise, blocking out her voice. He ensured that his eyes stayed at the area directly beside Han Sooyoung’s head, as Han Sooyoung continued questioning him, her questions left unanswered and ignored.
Yoo Joonghyuk did have a reason for doing what he did. He just knew that Han Sooyoung’s would think his actions were an over exaggeration of his thoughts.
He had heard Song Minwoo gossiping about Kim Dokja to his friends.
“I bet that loner got beat up.”
“Wouldn’t be surprising.”
Yoo Joonghyuk couldn’t control it. He seethed of rage. In the spur of the moment, he hit Song Minwoo. He would’ve ended it there, but the boy retaliated, aiming for his forehead, and things more or less went out of hand.
Yoo Joonghyuk didn’t regret it. Song Minwoo was the one who tempted him anyways.
“Yoo Joonghyuk. I’m going to have to call your mother, you know.”
Yoo Joonghyuk stilled, before mouthing a silent ‘okay’.
And so, approximately half an hour later, Namgung Minyoung arrived. She was slightly out of breath, as she asked a teacher at the desk outside for her child.
Yoo Joonghyuk approached her meekly, a bandage on his forehead and a timid look on his face.
“Joonghyuk-ie…” she shook her head, huffing, before continuing, “what happened?” She placed her hands on his shoulders, ushering him out, as she simultaneously bowed to Yoo Sangah, who was waving goodbye to them.
Song Minwoo and his mother were there as well, glaring at him and Namgung Mingoung as she fussed over him.
When they returned home, Namgung Minyoung sat Yoo Joonghyuk down at the couch, and the lady headed to the kitchen to make peppermint tea, Yoo Joonghyuk’s favourite.
When Yoo Joonghyuk received the mug of piping hot liquid, he muttered his thanks, bringing the cup to his lips, nearly burning himself when attempting to drink it.
“Are you ready to talk about it now?”
“It not my fault! He… he was bullying a boy.” Yoo Joonghyuk lowered his voice to a whisper after his hasty excuse, frowning.
“Of course. I’m sure you had a valid reason, but voilence isn’t the answer. Well, not in this instance.”
Yoo Joonghyuk reluctantly nodded, as he took a sip of tea.
“So, I want you to apologise to what’s-his-face tomorrow, and yeah, you can curse him in your head or something, just don’t get yourself in too much trouble, ‘Kay?”
Namgung Minyoung gave him a reassuring smile, and Yoo Joonghyuk blinked at her, before nodding.
He did exactly what his mother told him to, earning little forgiveness from Song Minwoo, and Yoo Joonghyuk genuinely thought that perhaps people like him just weren’t worth his effort.
——
Soon, Yoo Joonghyuk’s bad luck ended. His life resumed. Kim Dokja returned to the kindergarten, mood slightly off. Yoo Joonghyuk noticed something was wrong, from the way Kim Dokja was wearing long sleeved clothing, covering his hands and legs.
Usually, Kim Dokja would wear denim shorts, and a short sleeved t-shirt with a colourful image.
Yoo Joonghyuk was curious. What happened during those two weeks when Kim Dokja was gone?
Yoo Joonghyuk tried to subtly find out the reason behind the change, but Kim Dokja was more on guard than usual.
Whenever Yoo Joonghyuk approached him from behind, Kim Dokja would jerk away.
Something was most definitely wrong.
“Kim Dokja.”
Yoo Joonghyuk had finally cornered the boy, and he had nowhere left to run.
“Y..yes, Joonghyuk-ah?”
Yoo Joonghyuk opened his mouth then closed it. Huh. He hadn’t thoroughly thought through what he would say.
He grabbed Kim Dokja’s arm, and pushed his sleeve up, much to Kim Dokja’s shock.
Purple and blue bruises decorated his arm, some newer than others. Yoo Joonghyuk gaped, before shoving up Kim Dokja’s other sleeve, which was in the same state.
“Kim Dokja.” Yoo Joonghyuk repeated, looking up at Kim Dokja’s face in horror.
Kim Dokja turned away in shame, hastily pulling his sleeves back down.
“Ms Han-” Before Yoo Joonghyuk could continue, Kim Dokja clamped a hand over Yoo Joonghyuk’s mouth.
‘ Don’t’ he mouthed, an air of desperation visible on his face.
Yoo Joonghyuk sternly turned to face Kim Dokja.
“This is serious. You have to tell Teacher.”
“No I don’t.” Kim Dokja replied, as he released his hand from his mouth, glaring at him.
It was an unfamiliar look, that aura of hostility new to Yoo Joonghyuk. It was obvious Kim Dokja was no longer that happy-go-lucky boy who was always smiles and laughs.
It was amazing what two weeks of absence could do.
However, Yoo Joonghyuk had been taught since young that people like Kim Dokja needed to be aided and helped.
“ Ms Han!”
Kim Dokja nearly tackled the bigger boy to the ground.
“Joonghyuk-ah, please .”
“Kim Dokja, please. ” Just let me help you. Those were the unsaid words between the two.
Yoo Joonghyuk didn’t understand. Why wouldn’t Kim Dokja just seek help from the teachers? Surely he would be able to improve his situation if he did that.
By now, Han Sooyoung had come to the two boys, after hearing her name being called twice.
“Is everything okay?”
Kim Dokja vigorously nodded whereas Yoo Joonghyuk shook his head. Han Sooyoung lifted an eyebrow, but she didn’t leave them.
“Are you sure it’s all fine, Joonghyuk?” She asked the taller boy, who was known to be more responsible. Yoo Joonghyuk looked at Kim Dokja, whose eyes begged him to shut up. Yoo Joonghyuk had never been one to listen to others though.
“Kim Dokja’s arms-” Yoo Joonghyuk started, much to Kim Dokja’s dismay. “-are bruised.” he finished.
“Joonghyuk. That’s a really serious topic. Don’t joke about it.” Han Sooyoung said sternly, her face hardened. By now, Kim Dokja was shrinking away, slowly stepping away from the teacher and student.
“But I'm not joking!” Yoo Joonghyuk sputtered, surprised that the teacher would ever doubt him.
“Hah… Kim Dokja, come back here.” Han Sooyoung said, grabbing Kim Dokja by the shoulder and pulling him back.
Kim Dokja yelped at her touch, as he pulled his sleeves even more downward.
“Can I see?” Han Sooyoung asked for his consent, holding his arms firmly, looking at him with suspicious eyes.
Kim Dokja shook his head, attempting to retract his arms from the lady’s hold. But alas, he was simply a child and his try was futile.
Han Sooyoung released one of his arms, and pulled up his sleeve. Her eyes widened at the sight, yet her reaction was not as severe as Yoo Joonghyuk’s.
“Your mother or father? Or a relative?” She asked. Yoo Joonghyuk didn’t understand what she meant by that question, yet Kim Dokja did, answering hesitantly.
“…Father.”
“Does your mother know?” Han Sooyoung asked, her voice soft and expression sympathetic. Kim Dokja nodded in response, once again pulling his hand away from here. Han Sooyoung let him.
After that, Han Sooyoung and Kim Dokja disappeared off somewhere. Where to, Yoo Joonghyuk didn’t know.
After a while, Yoo Sangah left as well, with Kim Dokja’s bag in tow. The lady who was always smiling at the front desk came into their class, and substituted for the teachers till Yoo Sangah returned.
Yoo Joonghyuk pestered her for what happened to the teacher and child, but Yoo Sangah refused to tell him.
——
When Kim Dokja came back a week later, he seemed… lighter yet sadder. As if he was less troubled yet his mood was worse, if there was such a thing.
Nevertheless, Yoo Joonghyuk was satisfied (not that he’d ever say it), since the bruises on Kim Dokja’s arms were fainter now, and he internally patted himself on the back for helping Kim Dokja resolve his troubles.
Perhaps it was Yoo Joonghyuk’s imagination, but they seemed to get along more.
Kim Dokja and Yoo Joonghyuk were the last students in the classroom again. They were huddled together, seated on the floor, as they flipped through a picture book.
Well, Yoo Joonghyuk was. Kim Dokja had fallen asleep, leaning onto his shoulder. They had had a learning journey that day to the nearby park, and Kim Dokja seemed to have exhausted his energy from that.
Yoo Joonghyuk was happy.
Han Sooyoung watched the two, giggling to herself as she grabbed her handphone from her pocket, and sneaked a picture of the two boys.
She decided that she would show it to them when they grew up and tease them about it.
Humming the tune of a popular song, she continued watching over them. She had a feeling everything would progress smoothly for those two.