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A gentle breeze blows by the pair as they walk, the cold air’s sting making her squint her eyes. Movement in the corner of her vision draws her attention away from the direction they’re headed, looking off at a tree as the shape of what she assumes is a squirrel rushes up the trunk of a tree. They’re almost hitting winter, seeing them is going to be next to impossible soon. A low hum leaves her at the thought.
“What, did you see something?” She didn’t even realise she’d stopped walking until Mizuki’s voice pulled her from her thoughts, drawing her attention over to them. They stood with their hand on their hip, looking over their shoulder with an almost smug grin on their face. What do they see that she doesn’t? What could they be reading on her face right now? Ena sighs, shaking her head as she picks back up walking, her arms crossing over her chest.
“I thought I did. Must have just been a squirrel or something.” She gets next to the other again before they start walking, pulling their arms behind their head with a few clicks of their tongue. It brings her to look at them with a bubbling annoyance just under her skin. The way the sun reflects off their skin is something she wishes she could capture in her pieces, but every attempt to capture this view has never looked right. She doesn’t have the skills to pull it off. To represent them the way she sees them. She’s never been able to get those colours right.
“All that and it was “just a squirrel”? C’mon, Ena, you can find a better excuse than that!”
“What excuse? That’s what I saw!” She huffs, looking ahead of them at the path they’re walking. The park stretches out as far as she cares to see on either side of them. Just another view she wishes she could capture. “Something moved in the corner of my eye, and I tried to see what it was. It ran up the tree before I could get a good look at it.”
Mizuki rolls their head around in the corner of her eye, now looking off into the park, away from her. Their arms fall, bringing Ena’s attention once again to the person she’s out with. She can’t see their face anymore, but everything about them is still so beautiful. The visibly silky hair pulled to the side of their head, the way it wraps around itself at its ends. They take such good care of it, they have to. There’s no other explanation for how it looks so gentle. Like she could run her hands through it and she’d come out the other end with the lingering feeling of a cloud in her palm. She tightens her arms over her chest to make sure she doesn’t just reach out to touch them.
“Look at that view.” Their voice comes out in a breathy whisper, both of them coming to a stop on the path as Ena looks past Mizuki at the park view in question. She has to keep in a sigh as her shoulders drop, her fingers tighten against her arms.
Grey. Everything out there.
She was hoping that this trip could help push it back, get her out of the dip, but it seems like that’s impossible. The trees, the grass, the way the sun peers through each branch. It’s like she’s looking at a monochrome landscape. She takes a step closer to Mizuki, redirecting her attention again to them. To the pink hair waving in the light breeze, their eyes sparkling in the morning sunlight, the painted nails that just bring their whole outfit together in a masterclass of style. She wishes she could look like this, that she could be so effortlessly beautiful and give light to the world around her. But just one look at her hand, the faded shadows within the creases of her palms as they look sickly pale, tells her everything she needs to know about that possibility. She shakes her head while looking back to Mizuki.
“It’s beautiful, yeah.”
“I don’t come out to the park often enough. We should come out here again when it’s snowing, that’d be a wonderful sight. Yeah?” Mizuki looks back at Ena, her cheeks starting to burn as Mizuki tilts their head with a smirk. “Were you even looking out there, Enanan?” That tease in their voice, the use of her username. They’re so playful, so light. She doesn’t even contrast well against it.
“What are you talking about?” She tears her attention away once more, looking back at the path they were walking with a huff. Her finger digs into her arm. “Of course I would be! You started talking, so I looked at you.”
“Oh, sure. Like that look in your eyes doesn’t tell a different story.”
“What look?!”
Ena feels a finger at her jaw, pulling her head back over to Mizuki. They’d gotten closer. They almost glow from this angle. The sun behind them, painting a shining ring around their silhouette. The wrinkle at the corners of their eyes as their smirk turns into a smile that alone makes her heart pump faster against her ribs. That slight tilt of their head, the subtly opened lips. This small glimpse in at the true Mizuki, the one that makes them shine from deep beneath the surface.
The Mizuki that Ena fell in love with.
“That one, Enanan.” Their voice sits quiet. A whisper that dances on her ear in a way not even the breeze’s song can compete with. The tease in their voice has completely vanished. Part of her wants to step away, wants to tear her gaze away and reject whatever could be coming next. A voice in the back of her head screams that she’s just going to muddy their beauty, that the single touch they’ve already done will just leave a stain on their finger. She breathes a soft exhale, her arms dropping to her side. It only makes Mizuki’s smile grow. Her heart is trying to break through her ribcage. She can hear it in her ears, rushing and pushing her to step away and avoid this mistake.
“You’re incorrigible, Amia,” Ena answers in a somewhat shaky whisper. She curses her voice for being so weak. Herself for being so pathetic. What does Mizuki see in her? “Utterly unbearable…” That one sounded more secure. Good.
Mizuki laughs, pulling their hand away from her face and covering their mouth. It’s like each action adds a new touch of vibrancy to the world behind them, just out of Ena’s focus. The halo of light that hugs their body growing, painting her world with beauty. And their hand, their finger—it’s not tainted. She didn’t cover it up with her grey. The skin is still bright, looking just as soft as it felt against her skin. The sight tugs at her hand to reach out for it, to wrap their fingers in hers. Her heart pushes harder against her chest. It’s painful, the voices scream for her to get out. She isn’t worthy, she isn’t pretty enough to even be in this kind of presence. This kind of beauty.
Her hand reaches out, cupping the back of Mizuki’s head. The hair pulled to the side, her fingers brushing through it.
Her eyes close, the world being coated in a swirling darkness that eats away at her.
Her lips touch theirs, and the world falls still. Pink floods her vision, even with her eyes closed. Her heart finally rests.
Everything finally feels right.
It takes a soft tap to her cheek from Mizuki’s thumb for Ena to finally release the kiss the pair had locked into, her eyes fluttering open to view upon the beauty before her. How they manage to draw back the insatiable greys at the corners of her eyes she’ll never truly know, but the very sight of them seems to fill an otherwise empty world with a vibrancy she cannot begin to describe. Her cheeks burn with embarrassment as Mizuki brushes their thumb across her cheekbone, shaking their head. Even the subtle movements give enough view of the world around them for Ena to be certain that it worked.
“Sorry,” she says with a laugh hopping through her chest. Breaking their eye contact as she looks down, turning the palm of her hand once sat on Mizuki’s shoulder to her. Her body finally felt real, she finally looked okay. Her smile only grows at the sight, hidden behind Ena placing her forehead beneath the other’s chin, making them have to stifle a laugh as their hand brushes through her hair. “You were just too pretty to look away from. I had to get a closer look.”
“A closer look?” Their voice holds that tease again. It’s so gentle despite its purpose. “How are you supposed to see me when we’re kissing?”
She shrugs, which only makes Mizuki have to keep in another laugh. “You’d be surprised, the things I see when our eyes are closed.”
“Yeah? What kind of things?” Their other hand now sits at the small of her back, pulling her closer. Ena moves her head to Mizuki’s shoulder, resting their heads side-by-side.
“Mmn…” she hums with playful thought. She can see Mizuki’s eyes rolling in the back of her head. “Maybe if you behaved, I’d let you know.”
“Do you really want me to behave? Call me crazy, but it seems like you like me like this.”
Ena groans, pushing herself away from Mizuki with a gentle shove at their shoulder. The stifled laughs from before finally come out as they stumble back a few steps, the sound only further making the park around them brighter. The colours of the leaves on the ground, freshly fallen. The sun peeking over a pair of buildings in the distance, bathing the sky in an array of colours with the early morning. Before now, she couldn’t believe that she would ever wake up this early, but seeing the view before her now, with the full spectrum of colour at her disposal, she doesn’t regret a thing. She brushes some hair behind her ear while flicking her attention back to Mizuki, only now starting to recover from the laughing fit.
“Now I won’t tell you!”
“No, Enanannnn~!”
“You can’t whine your way out of this one, Amia. You didn’t behave like I asked, so you won’t get my secrets.”
Mizuki groans, their body making exaggerated movements in complaint. “You’re so mean, Enanan! Teasing me like that…”
“I’m teasing you?”
Mizuki winks at her before starting to again walk down the path they’d been taking. They put a hand at their hip, gaze trailing out to look over the park once again. Ena shakes her head, a smile impossible to take off her lips, while moving with a small jog to catch up to them. She slips her hand into theirs, making Mizuki look over at her. The smile on their face, in their eyes.
This is why she’s here. Why she’s trying so hard. The person under the surface, looking back at her with a love that she can’t even begin to explain the origin of. But a look that she so fully understands, for it’s all shared.
She’ll keep waiting. As long as she needs. It was a promise she intends to keep.